Virtually the entire movie in one way or another. However, if we have to pick some specific examples...
- One of the best bits in the film comes near the beginning as the Benbow's patrons are leaving:Mrs. Bluveridge: Be sure to be back tomorrow for our weekly special: roast suckling...(A group of pigs look scandalized)Mrs. Bluveridge: ...potatoes!(The pigs are mollified. Then a very offended potato-woman walks by)Mrs. Bluveridge: No offense, madam, no offense.Potato-Woman: Mah.
- Blind Pew the "Visually challenged" fiend, spends a majority of his scenes making one Blind Mistake after another; HE thinks a living moose head is Billy Bones, and during the pirates' raid on the Admiral Benbow, he opens a clock's case, rushes in, and bangs his head on the pendulum. When the inn is on fire, and everyone else is panicking, all Pew says is, "I think I smell something burning, no?"
- "He died? And this is supposed to be a kids movie!"
(they all freak out, Rizzo and Gonzo run down the stairs and Jim runs the wrong way)
- "But I'm not Jimmy-Jim-Jimmy-Jim-Jim-Jim-Jim! He's Jimmy-Jim-Jimmy-Jim-Jim-Jim-Jim!"
- Billy Bones's last words: "Beware of running with scissors or any other pointy objects, it's all good fun until somebody loses an—AAAAGH!!" *dies*
- "We're standing in a room with A DEAD GUY!!!"
- While looking for the treasure map, Gonzo finds Diplomacy by Henry Kissinger and throws it in disgust.
- The running gag of Mrs. Bulveridge able to hear someone slacking off despite being in a completely different room or upstairs. When Billy Bones wants rum, you hear her screaming "Don't be giving him anymore rum!" Everyone stares up as Billy moans "How does she bloody do that?!"
Jim, Gonzo and Rizzo: How does she do that?!
- It pays off as the last we see of her, she's literally smashed through the wall of the burning inn, fighting a half dozen pirates at once and telling the guys to just run, she'll hold them off.
- When Gonzo spills gunpowder all over the store room floor at the Admiral Benbow, and then the pirates attack him and Rizzo; they drop a lit candle onto the spilled gunpowder, with awesome and hilarious results.Dog Pirate: Oh, woof.
- Statler and Waldorf's first exchange:Statler: Take a cruise, you said. See the world, you said. Now, we're stuck on the front of this stupid ship.Waldorf: Well, it could be worse. We could be stuck in the audience.Both: DOH-ho-ho-ho!!
- This dialogue when Polly Lobster is introduced:Gonzo: I thought sailors had talking parrots as pets.Long John Silver: Talking... parrots?
- "...and people die by falling overboard!" Great line to insert in a cheery song about sailing for adventure.
- "...and margaritas at the midnight buffet!" "MARGARITAS AT THE MIDNIGHT BUFFET!"
- The roll call scene.Samuel Arrow: Big-fat-ugly-bug-faced-baby-eating-O'Brien? (Smollett does a Double Take and looks at the list)
Attractive Woman: (deep male voice) Aye.
(Arrrow and Smollett do a Jaw Drop)
Samuel Arrow: Angel Marie!
- Followed by:
Really Ugly Muppet: AYE! AYE!
Arrow: Old Tom!
- Pretty much every single name called is a gag.
Old Tom: Aye!
Arrow: Real Old Tom!
Older Tom: Aye!
Arrow: Dead Tom!
Dead Tom: *a Muppet skeleton steps into frame, manipulated by another Muppet* Aye-aye!
Arrow and Smollett exchange looks as if saying "what do you know about that!"
Arrow: Clueless Morgan!
Clueless Morgan: Huh?
Arrow: Headless Bill! (beat) Headless Bill?
Arrow and Smollett lead over and see a headless guy, who gives them a salute.
- Earlier, there's One-Eyed Jack, who does indeed have only one eye...covered by an eyepatch.
- After the roll is called and Kermit (and the audience) get a good look at the rather unsavory crew, he very calmly and politely asks to see the main characters in his cabin. Cut to him screaming "WHO HIRED THIS CREW? THIS IS UNDOUBTEDLY THE SEEDIEST BUNCH OF CUTTHROATS, VILLAINS AND SCOUNDRELS I HAVE EVER SEEN, SO WHO HIRED 'EM?!?!? *huff* *huff*" Everyone points to Fozzie, who points at his own finger.Smollett: Your finger hired the crew???
Squire: No, that's silly! That man who lives in my finger hired the crew. Mr. Bimble *listens to his finger* What? Ah, yeah, he relied heavily on the advice of our excellent cook, Long John Silver.
Smollet: A cook, and a guy who lives in a bear's finger???
Smollett: I'm starting to worry about this voyage.
- During the scene where Long John and Smollett debate over drinking alcohol, Fozzie keeps pouring himself a glass when Long John makes a point and throwing it out the window when Smollett objects, until finally, a trio of annoyed rats appear at the window:Male Rat: (To Fozzie) You wanna knock it off with the booze?! It's peeling the paint off the shuffleboard court!
- Clueless Morgan and company trying to torture Gonzo for information. They put Gonzo on the rack, but the only thing they succeed at doing is making his arms and legs ten feet long.Gonzo: I might even have a future in the NBA!
- Even funnier in that if you watch the scene closely one of Gonzo's arms or legs gets over to where Smollett is standing and starts tickling him while Smollett stares into the camera.
- The "Cabin Fever" number.
- The highlight of that would be the outer shot of the ship with spotlight waving wildly, specifically during the lyrics "This once proud vessel has become a floating psycho ward...".
- "I'd like to get my hands on whoever wrote this script."
- At the very end, nobody even remembers that the Cabin Fever song even happened, except for Clueless, making it an In-Universe Big-Lipped Alligator Moment too.
- The following exchange as Gonzo and Rizzo sit eating apples:Gonzo: This feels so weird.Rizzo: What? That Mr. Arrow's dead?Gonzo: That, and my pants are filled with starfish.Rizzo: (beat) You and your hobbies.
- Made even better in the film's climax when Gonzo whips out said starfish to use as ninja stars against one of the pirates.
- When Silver begins the "Professional Pirate" song, Jim is looking around with an expression of "the hell?"
- Benjamina's spoiled entrance. "You stupid anteater!"
- The Swedish Chef's very random appearance (complete with a fake pig snout) as the tribe's chef. The veggies says what the audience is thinking.Vegetable: Well, how else d'you think we were gonna get him in this movie?
- Captain Flint killed fifteen men and hung up two of them on the path to the treasure because he thought it was funny... and then we find out that he dated Benjamina. Who complained that he was co-dependent.
- This exchange:"Dead Tom's dead! Long John shot him!""But—Dead Tom's always been dead. That's why he's called 'Dead Tom.'""Oh." (drops the bones)
Long John: The Black Spot? You dare to give me the Black Spot?Clueless Morgan: (fearful and quickly points at Polly Lobster) He told me too!Polly: Shut up, will ya!Long John: And it's drawn on a page from the Bible? You tore a page from the Holy Scriptures to make a pirates death sentence?!(Crowd parts to show Mad Monty holding said bible. He quickly tries to get rid of it)
- And Long John rolling his eyes in the background.
- And this one:
Long John: OOOOHHH, the red-hot GATES OF HELL are creeping open! SATAN is heatin' his pokers for you, you blasphemous HEATHENS! Fall down on your KNEES, and BEG for deliverance from DAMNATION!
- "Very good. *eye roll* You're forgiven."
- Adding to the humor is the earlier scene Played for Drama when Long John shoots at the pirates when they turned against him, and when we cut back to them we find out the only person "killed" from the shootout was Dead Tom.
- Benjamina's reunion with Long John SilverBenjamina: Well hello, Looooooooooong John!
- The... "showdown" between the pirates and pig islanders.Chieftain: You! Tiny pirate men stand down, or die like stinking dogs!
* Long John shoots his headdress off*
Chieftain: We see you have boom-boom sticks. *beat* Bye bye.
* tribe runs away*
Benjamina: (facepalms) Oh brother...
- The reaction from Benjamina:
Silver: Now, Benjamina!
Benjamina: (still exasperated and not looking at him) What?
- Samuel Arrow is still not done gauging the lifeboat's seaworthiness as he rows ashore, as he then asks the others to join him in the "exceptionally safe" lifeboat.
- Hearing that pirates are superstitious, Bunsen thinks up a way to get Silver's pirate crew to leave. Sam rises out into the ship's platform in white flour, with a deadpan performance as a 'ghost': "Boogie, boogie, boogie. I am the ghost of Samuel Arrow." *beat* "Boogie!" Followed by the entire pirate crew throwing themselves off the ship in panic.
- Statler and Waldorf in their last appearance, after they save Kermit and Miss Piggy.Statler: Waldorf you old fool. We're heroes! We saved the pig and the frog.Waldorf: Well, it was too late to save the movie. (All laugh)
- In the middle of Kermit's Flynning, Silver says "Excuse me", and a distracted Kermit lets the sword go flying. Made better by the look of "you've gotta be kidding me" on Curry's face.
- Arrow's reaction. He face palms...while punching Polly Lobster without even looking.
- A massive Mood Whiplash occurs after Kermit and Mrs. Piggy has sung "Love Led Us Here". Miss Piggy's rope suddenly burns up and she is about to fall to her death coupled with hysterical screaming. Kermit manages to catch her, and he has Wide Eyes and Shrunken Irises and a very expressive mouth as he struggles to support her weight.
Benjamina: You know, I'm beginning to see a pattern in the men I date.
- Love Led Us Here is in itself very funny, considering it's an Award Bait parody song where the participants are hanging upside down throughout. Also, Kermit and Piggy's ballad is intercut with scenes of Long John and the pirates gleefully frolicking in the gold at her house.
- And prior to the song, only Smollett was hanging. Once Benjamina gives up the location of the treasure to get Silver to let him go, she ends up in the same situation and delivers this line:
- Smollett's idea for dealing with the pirates once Jim and the others have told him about Silver's planned mutiny.Smollett: The plan is simple. Once the pirates are ashore, we set sail and return in a year or so. By then all the fight should be out of them.
- The final fight scene is full of hilarious moments; such as Gonzo making use of his starfish-filled pants, Miss Piggy defeating one of the pirates by kissing him, and when Clueless Morgan gives up and falls over with an "Uncle, uncle... I'm dead" Jim just rolls his eyes.
- Near the end, Silver manages to escape, steal the treasure, and row away from the Hispaniola...except, as Arrow revealed, the jolly boat he took was "Very unsafe". Next scene, Silver's dinghy is sinking, and Silver is forced to swim back to Treasure Island! And to twist the knife a little further, the credits show the rats salvaging the loot. The final scene during the credits reveals that since the boars went with Benjamina, the only company Silver has on the island is one very annoying pig statue...Pig statue: Hey, Johnny! Can I call you Johnny? Why does the ocean roar? Give up? You would too, if you had crabs on your bottom, and oysters in your bed! Huh? Huh? I tell ya, I gotta a million more just like it!
- Thanks to the 3-disc CD-ROM, Billy Bones ends up being Spared By Adaptation, walking away from the events with only a Heroic BSoD. His last set of words:Bones: The Black Spot! The Black Spo-ot!