- Chowder screaming "I'm too young to die!" when the house tries to eat them.
- And there's this in that same scene:Chowder: Jenny, I've always loved you!
- And there's this in that same scene:
- Mr. Nebbercracker's first appearance involves him running out onto his front lawn, shrieking at a little girl on a tricycle, "Do you want to be eaten alive?!" is frightening in one sense, but takes a funny turn when she answers, "No."
- During the flashback of the house's origin, a paperboy tosses a paper at the house. The house immediately tosses it back at him and smacks him off his bike.
- The running gag of the boys' pee bottles. Spending all night staring at the house, the boys forego using the restroom and relieve themselves in their empty Mountain Dew bottles. The next morning, Zee comes in to check on them, and absentmindedly picks up one of the bottles, only for DJ to tell her "Don't drink those." Later, Jenny comes up to the room where the boys fight over trying to impress her when:Jenny: [spots the bottle] Is that PEE?
Chowder: gasp D.J, you pee in bottles?
D.J: What do you mean, this is your pee!
- Chowder's sadness over losing his basketball in Nebbercracker's yard:Chowder: [in tears] I paid 28 dollars for that ball! I raked ten yards! And asked my mom for a dollar 26 times! I never worked that hard in my life!
- This dialogue when DJ and Chowder are escaping from the Monster House.DJ: (as he and Chowder flee back into his house) Don't look back!
Chowder: (looks back anyway and the house makes a scary face) AHHHH, I LOOKED BACK!
- Chowder's insults at the house in the climax.You ain't nothin'! You're a shack! You're an out-house!
- There's also how he's constantly honking the tractor's horn all while being chased by the house.
- And DJ's attempt at lightening a situation at the end.
- DJ climbing out to destroy the house after getting a Motivational Kiss from Jenny.DJ: [gleefully] I kissed a girl! I kissed a girl ON THE LIPS!
- This gem:Jenny: If those are the teeth and thats the tongue, then that must be the uvula.
Chowder: Oh. So its a girl house...
Jenny: *disgusted* What? No. It stimulates the gag reflex. Everyone has a uvula.
Chowder: Not me.
- TV spots and trailers for the movie showed the house swallowing the police car whole with the cops inside, and all that there's left is the car's hubcap, which continues to spin in the middle of the street.
- The house itself, despite being the antagonist of the movie, actually gets a few funny moments, especially in the original script.
- There's one scene where the house shows Chowder his basketball to try and lure him in, and it uses the small staircase in its foyer to dribble it, and also somehow manages to draw a scary face on it.
- One of the house's antics in the original script involves two characters that were cut from the movie, two neighborhood bullies named Ryan and Cameron, who throw eggs at the house. The house manages to catch the eggs with its tree branches and throws them back at the bullies.
- Another one from the original script includes the house letting out a loud belch right after eating the vacuum cleaner-dummy.
- It may be subject to Nightmare Retardant, but the way the script describes how the house was originally supposed to eat the squad car is strangely funny. It allegedly states that the house is holding the car with two of its tree-hands similar to how a human would hold a hamburger.
- Chowder tells DJ to try being more calm and rational like Chowder himself. Chowder then mistakenly turns on the bulldozer he was playing on and freaks the hell out.Chowder: Aaargh! Aaargh! Aaargh! Make it stop!
- Basically every line from officer Landers and Lister. One is even voiced by Kevin James, who can always be counted on for a laugh.
Funny / Monster House