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Funny / LISA

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"Joined you after a destiny deciding bowel movement."
While LISA is a dark game, it also has some of the funniest humor in any RPG Maker game.
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     LISA The First 

     LISA: The Painful RPG 
  • Does Brad falling flat on his face ever get old?
  • Nern is set up to be an Exposition Fairy... except he ends up making personal ramblings on his life instead. Hilariously, the only time he says something relevant about the setting, he declares it to be boring and starts rambling about his visit to the doctor.
  • Terry Hintz means well, but is ultimately an ineffectual companion at first . His regular attack just has him tripping and brushing his head against an enemy. Bonus points if it ends up being the finishing blow.
    • His special moves in general. His knuckle drop is considered ineffectual (though they deal decent damage). Each upgrade talks about how it will never not not be an effectual maneuver.
    • His hot dance and hottest dance descriptions. Even the game cannot make out how he's dishing out so much damage with those moves.
  • There's a guy in the Fishman Village dressed as a fishman. If you talk to him, he tries to make fish noises before telling Brad that the fish people understand him. He then shows up in the Jury in court...
  • Harvey's introductory scene.
  • The item description for Diet Cocola Cola.
    If you throw this can at someone it won't hurt, it's a soft drink! Recovers 200 SP.
  • The bulldozer driver's hilariously dismal backstory, in which he repeatedly ruins his life by trying (and failing) to drive a bulldozer.
  • One area is populated by people who pray to their god for sustenance every day. After a lot of build-up, it turns out that their god is a drive-thru speaker, and their prayers sound like somebody placing an order at a restaurant. The person on the other end of the speaker is significantly less funny.
  • In the crossroad between Area 1 and 2, there is a blonde man who melodramatically narrates his demise until his last breath, calling out to the only witness (a random man with sunglasses) to remember him. The name of this guy? Lukas. The witness' apathy seals it.
  • When you pass through a Rando camp, you are stopped by four soldiers. Upon turning back and talking to them, they will ask what your business is here. You can either say that you're looking for someone, just passing through... or just say "Fuck you" to the group. The latter will cause all of them, even the calm Mystic Pete, to attack you at once.
  • How Rando's introduction is a combination of awesome, badass, Oh, Crap!, and funny, as Brad just smashes his motorcycle into him with no seemingly lasting effect, besides an apology for destroying the bike.
  • In area 2, there is a sign that points out that there is something very important at the top. As you climb, epic music is played (think Snake Eater's ladder climbing sequence). Only to find a giant middle finger statue
    • Attempting to commit suicide at the top has the game nonchalantly declaring to you "nah, you don't want to do that. Just climb down" and forces you back.
  • Percy Monsoon's introduction (in the top picture of this page).
    • In the art book, every character has a description which elaborates more on their character. Percy's description? "Who cares."
  • In some areas, the background music sounds like it's coming from a trombone. If you were to ascend in the higher parts of area 1, you can find the man who has been playing that. He stops playing the moment he enters the screen and gives you an awkward look. Turns out it's Dr. Yado. There is a reason why he is doing this.
  • Some of the Salvation Rangers' Spoof Aesop lines can come off as this. Then you hear Salvation Black's, which is "No race jokes, please!" accompanied by his animal noise... a monkey screech.
  • A henchman of the Russian Roulette host can tell you some bad puns.
    "A broken pencil is pointless."
    • Another henchman, at the bottom of that same area, will attempt to tell you a bad pun... but it was so poorly executed that he decides to kill himself.
  • The surnames of Nern's old neighbors are all puns based on tableware. Tom "Fork-knife". Karen "Plate-burger". Dale Spooner.
    • Which makes sense since according to Word of God, Nern is a reference to a kung fu flick called Fight Among the Supers (1984). The main characters are gods of tableware.
  • Columbo's introduction, where he rides in on top of a deer, trying to look badass.
    "Howdy, mother fucker."
  • Some of the reasons for people wanting to attack Brad can be down right stupid. The members of the men's hair club, for example, are kind to Brad at first... only to realize he's bald. So their hair combines to form a giant middle finger, and becomes sentient enough to attack you.
    • One other character attempts to ambush you prior to entering a cave. Turns out he's wearing two eye patches.
    • One very memorable ambush is a blonde guy ("Scott Lawson, Master of Surprise!") coming in to kick Brad in the crotch before running. Catching up to him will initiate a battle where Brad immediately performs a surprise attack, that hits him so hard, he clinches onto his crotch for eternity. When you examine him, Brad has this to say:
    "He's dead on the inside."
    • Iori Stevens, a Kickstarter enemy found in Skull Town, will attack Brad because you interrupted his intense wall-staring.
  • Somehow managing to lose to Trips Breezer (the Rando Army guy who doesn't want to fight you and will never attack, instead wasting his turns crying and stalling) will have him say this before you get a game over:
    "I don't know how you lost to me holy shit."
  • Hawk Hollywood, an insufferable narcissist who makes a flashy entrance (literally) complete with a fluttery Leitmotif. Regardless of how the player responds (agreeing with or insulting him), Hawk takes it as an insult and attacks. After being defeated, a roughed-up Hawk slowly frolics his way off-screen accompanied by the aforementioned melody.
    • While his battle is significantly less funny in Pain Mode, with him becoming a Joy Mutant, the fact that his mutant form looks like a flag pole is somewhat darkly amusing.
  • The side-quest required to recruit Queen Roger. It involves having Brad cross-dress, complete with lipstick on. You then have to seduce a handful of men, which plays out like a normal battle, except you use abilities consisting of talking dirty, scratching, or biting. Even their defeat animations consist of them sprouting out hearts, with a sped up version of Gotta Die Sometime playing.
    • Completing the quest allows you to wear the dress at any time.
  • The flashback to Rick's horrible family life.
    I'm going to watch TV.

     LISA: The Joyful 
  • It is possible to die in roughly three seconds from the moment you take control by walking off a cliff. In a flashback sequence.
  • On the path to Lardy Hernandez has Gary the Hot Soup appearing completely out of nowhere, stopping an oncoming truck with his bare hands, and then you fight him. His theme music? "666 Kill Chop Deluxe", a crunkcore song that samples some random yodeling and MLG airhorns. It's as awesome as it is hilariously unexpected.
  • Larry Stintz, who can help you activate the easy mode. The game repeatedly mocks you the whole way and just ends when you beat the second boss, including a disdainful thumbs-up statue replacing the "Brad" scarecrow.
    • When you enter the area with him? It plays a much slower version of "666 Kill Chop Deluxe". When you fight the first boss? A much faster version of it plays!
    • A rather amusing tidbit during this segment is the so-called "REAL weapon" that Larry gives you if you opt in, which is... a foam stick, which raises your ATK and S.ATK stats to absurd levels.
    The strongest weapon weapon a warrior could ever want. *wink*
  • Vega Van Dam's Bishie Sparkles. So annoying, even his henchmen rudely tell him to stop it.
  • The rope climb appears again. But it's actually averted as you get a few free bottles, and a heartfelt message from Austin Jorgensen telling you about how he's thankful that you're playing his games, and offers you a reward for your care at the next screen. Yep, it's another middle finger statue. Like last time, the game refuses to let you kill yourself.
  • Terry Hintz' kingdom may be a massive tear jerker, but there is something amusing about finding a mask that looks like Terry's face.

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