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Funny / Key & Peele

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"I said biiiiiitch!"
  • The sketch where an African warlord asks one of his mooks to Mercy Kill him so he doesn't have to surrender to the enemy, who will torture him for weeks. The mook repeatedly screws up; first he stabs the warlord, without killing him. Then instead of shooting him in the head, he shoots him in the knee. Then when he actually is about to shoot him in the head, he runs out of bullets. Then he resorts to just hitting him over the head with the pistol. Then the warlord finally just tells him to grab some more bullets, only for the mook to throw a steel cooking pot at him. After some more convincing, he goes off to find more bullets....
    Mook: I did not find the bullets.
    Warlord: What!?
    Mook: But I did find something better: boiling hot water.
    Warlord: What are you going to do wi-
    Mook: (pours the boiling water on the warlord's crotch)
    Warlord: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! (runs out of the room and towards the fighting) I SURRENDER! I AM THE GENERAL-
    Mook: (horrified) Commander! Don't go! They'll torture you!
  • The Obama sketches with his anger translator, Luther.
    • The man himself has given these sketches his stamp of approval, even referencing them on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
    • White House Correspondents Dinner, April 24 2015. Obama invites Luther on-stage. Damn...
      • This bit:
        Obama: No—no. No, we're not.
        Luther: We're not?
        Obama: No.
        Luther: WHO THE HELL SAID THAT?!
      • And then Obama gets so worked up about climate change that Luther has to calm him down before he flees the stage to avoid Barry's wrath.
    • Obama and Luther crossing paths with Hillary Clinton and her Anger Translator Savannah. "Damn, some peoples is just too angry," Luther muses afterward...
    • Culminating in the "Farewell Address" video:
      • Towards the end, Luther books the Obama family a four-year hotel stay for five in Sweden. When Obama asks why five, he hastily claims it's for the dog Bo - and then whispers "Make it six..."
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    • Obama sits down with Republican leaders to hash out an agenda. Republicans, being openly obstructionist, say "we're going to disagree" right off the bat. So Obama pulls the "Do the opposite" gag on them, tricking the Republicans into agreeing to an ambitious liberal agenda. And the Republicans had gotten themselves so hard-wired to oppose everything Obama stands for that they can't stop themselves, one of them going so far as to cut his own tongue out in a futile attempt.
    Obama (gloating like a Magnificent Bastard): Nobody better toss me a cigarette. (catches one in his hand) (Aside Glance) Ain't I a stinker?
  • The East Coast/West Coast College Bowl sketch, featuring Key and Peele (and a token white guy) as a group of bizarrely named players (some of which don't even go to college — one is from a state prison).
    • That would be Torque [Construction Noise] Lewith, from Nevada State Penitentiary. The middle part is pronounced by the sounds of a jackhammer.
  • The entire skit with the inner city substitute teacher who keeps mispronouncing his students' names, such as calling Jacqueline Jay-qwel-lin and Blake Ba-la-key, only to think they're messing with him when they try to correct him. With each polite correction he just gets angrier and angrier culminating in...
    Teacher: Why didn't you answer the first time I said A-A-Ron?
    Aaron: ...Because it's pronounced Aaron.
    Teacher: SON OF A BITCH! (turns and around and swipes everything off his desk) YOU DONE MESSED UP A-A-RON! Now take your ass on down to O-Shag-Henessy's office right now and tell him what you did!
    Aaron: Who?
    Teacher: O-Shag-Henessy!
    Aaron: Principal O'Shaughnessy?
    Teacher: Get out of my goddamned classroom before I break my foot off in your ass! Insubordinate and churlish!
    • And then the punchline where the only kid he got the name right (Timothy, said as Tim-oh-thay) is a black kid that was out of view until the last second.
    Timothy: Pree-sant.
    • Part 3 is pretty freakin hilarious as well with the same teacher and students but instead of names, they argue over whether or not school clubs exist at the school. Must be seen to be fully appreciated.
    • This is taken Up to Eleven when the principal makes an announcement for all club members to come get their yearbook pictures taken, only for the teacher to say it's a fake announcement, with several of the students having absolutely mutinous looks on their faces.
    Teacher: Now does anybody have a REAL reason to leave class early?
    (one student raises his hand)
    Teacher: Yes, Timothy?
    Teacher: You're excused.
  • Flicker: Basically what would happen if Christopher Nolan and Michael McCann decided to make an episode of The Office.
  • "I said… (looks around for the wife) 'biiiiiiiiitch...'" They continue to do this even while they're floating in space. What's more, the series ends with their wives openly bragging about calling their husbands "bitch" without any concern that their husbands are right there hearing them.
  • East-West College Bowl 2.
  • The skit with the man who is mistaken for a terrorist and being tortured by a government agent. The whole thing is just gold.
    Terrorist: Terrier-ist! The phone call said terrier-ist! Me and my friends, we.. we breed dogs, and we write fiction! We discuss terrier-ist plots-
    (interrogator punches him in the stomach)
    Agent: Cut the shit Rashid!
    • And then at the end, it's revealed he really WAS a terrorist... and also a terrier-ist. The White House gets attacked by a bunch of small dogs.
  • Superman bed. Starts at 2:06
  • The fake Mr. T Public Service Announcement.
  • The Power Falcons sketch: it starts off as a Power Rangers parody, until they start calling Peele's character "Black Falcon". He's not the Black Falcon.
  • The rap battle with Barack Obama:
    Obama: (gets out of his limo) I'm the leader of the free world.
    (Mic Drop, exit Obama in his limo)
  • The sketch with the nervous boyfriend/husband looking at internet porn.
  • Some of the intro bits deserve some credit too.
  • "Aerobics Meltdown" a parody of the 'Crystal Light Aerobics Championship' videos from the 80s on YouTube.
  • Cat Poster. Jordan Peele's smarmy voice makes Carter Finley's idiotic attempts to be sneaky even more hilarious. "Hong...Inthar?"
    Finley: His name was... Baldy Tallman... Coffee... Coop.
    Detective: [Drinking from a coffee cup.] Now you're just talking about me! I'll give you one last chance, Finley... who... is in charge?
    Finley: [Still straight-faced.] His name was... Angry Man. The warehouse is located in the Diploma... for Being a Detective.
  • The Al-Qaeda Terrorist Meeting(Warning: NSFW language). All of it.
  • The East-West Pro Bowl went even further than its predecessors by having real NFL players with odd names (like D'Brickashaw Ferguson, who inspired the sketch in the first place, as well as Dahistorius Lamystorius and Hukalakanaka Hakanakaheekaluckahukahakafaka) interspersed with Key and Peele in various guises. It's capped off with Aaron Rodgers... who reads his name as "A. A. Ron Rod-Gers".
  • The Game Of Thrones recap. Which pretty much summarizes the series up to Season Four before the two answer the Call of the Blue.
  • Key and Peele taking the pre-game pump-up a little too serious. With each escalation more violent until we're into Kill Bill territory.
    Peele: (driving away from the explosion, sips tea in victory) Play this game... like it's the last game of your lives...
  • In this sketch Key, Peele, and several other black people form a flash mob dance to music that sounds very much like Thriller when this happens:
  • Dicknanigans. Warning: May elicit winces from those either involved with performance art or with dicks.
  • Harriet Tubman tries to lead some escaped slaves to freedom on the underground railroad. Unfortunately for them, Harriet is the world's first "free runner" aka, a hardcore parkour enthusiast.
    Escaped Slave: Where the hell is she now?
    (Harriet dives through a closed window then gets up like nothing happened)
    Harriet Tubman: That was the easy part. Now stay close. This next five hundred miles gets a little sticky.
  • The Retired Military Specialist sketch is a masterclass in how to subvert a cliche and simultaneously stretch a joke as far as humanly possible while still remaining utterly hilarious.
  • The "Les Mis" sketch, the moment when Key as Legataux sings "Now, where did this bitch come from?" is particularly funny in the context of the dark, serious material surrounding it.
  • Key as a unstable Macedonian cafe owner. [1]
  • Wendell's "Power of Wings" video shows where his budget went. The captive princess (who is on camera for like 10 seconds) cost him eight grand to cast. Worse, she appears to be just a common theater arts student.
    • Could count as a bit of Fridge Brilliance. Wendell has little, if any, contact with women of any kind, so he'd be completely unaware this amateur actress was outrageously overcharging.
  • Hingle Mccringleberry's outrageous Serial Escalation of his touchdown celebrations. Culminating in him inflating and frolicking in a Bounce Castle in the end zone.
  • "Post Apocalyptic Hunt:" the hero quests to find another human survivor in the wasteland, and final does... who turns out to be a hyperactive, childish, and annoying lunatic. He wordlessly offs him and then continues his search as if this encounter never happened.

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