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Funny / Immortals After Dark

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A Hunger Like No Other

Regin: And remember your training.
Emma: What, you mean that training where you whack me on the ass with a sword and say, 'Pow. You're dead. Pow, you're dead again.' I'll get right on that.
Regin: No, I mean that training where you run like hell whenever you hear that I am looking for you to train.

Wicked Deeds on a Winter's Night

Mariketa: My best friend thinks "Laissez les bon temps rouler" means "Plastic beads replace attire".

Dark Needs at Nights Edge

  • Nix to Neomi and Conrad after describing some of what their kids will get up to:
    "Auntie Nix will not be available to babysit those decades."


  • Dani, the Ice Queen Valkyrie gave Murdoch a telephone number, 867-5309, which is the name of a song by Tommy Tutone. When he called the recorded message was this:
    “If you’ve reached this message and you weren’t trying to contact Regin the Radiant then I know three things about you. One of my half sisters just tooled your ass and never wants to see you again. B. You’re pop-culturally illiterate not to know that this number is a song. And three, you’ll never tell another male about this humiliating prank, so the number trick can be continued indefinitely. If, however, you called for moi, then say something to amuse me after the beep.”


  • Lothaire entering the Valkyrie house and noticing one of the Scourge, who used to be a Macedonian warrioress
    “Didn’t I do you when you were pretty?” Another furious shriek, then she was swept away in the tide of their tempest. Lothaire shrugged. “Guess I did.”

Nix's t-shirts

  • I play with my prey
  • Heels Tall, Bikini Small
  • It'll only hurt for a second. Promise...
  • Sexually Liberated Uninhibited Tart
  • Why can’t we be friends?
    • This was a message to Lothaire

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