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Funny / Hope Springs Eternal

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  • Pain takes his work for Hades seriously. "We drew charts and pictures and everything. And we made sure to color inside the lines, this time."
  • Persephone has had a scare and Hades tries to make her laugh about the Furies' weird tastes: "Y'know, I think they get together with the Fates every few months and hold a quilting bee. Brrr! Scary stuff."
  • Aphrodite's thought on Hades and Persephone's relationship.
    "Okay, so it's kind of a May/December-Romance-thing," she announced, (thinking silently it really looked more like a Lolita Complex, though that was centuries ahead of their time)...
  • The chapter summaries on the Master List are all hilarious.
    In which Hades visits the happiest island in the Ionic Sea and manages not to vomit, and Persephone demonstrates poetic teenaged angst about her mother's plans. (contains singing)
  • Hades and Persephone's first meeting, where Hades panics and resorts to his "fast-talking used car salesman" gimmick:
    Hades: "Ahem. Hades, Lord of the Dead, hi howya doin'?"
    Persephone: "Uh, hi... Persephone, newly-appointed goddess of Spring, I'm just fine, thanks."
  • Hermes walking in on Persephone and Hades having sex. Hades doesn't even bother covering up as he yells at Hermes.
    "Hey, Hermes. There's this little invention, you might have heard of it. It's called 'a door'. You knock on it. Get the fucking gist?"
    • Even better is Hermes's reaction when he sees it.
    Holy Hera's hairnet!" "Oh shit, I think I've gone blind. Put on a chiton or something, willya please? We gotta rap, man, and I mean NOW!"
  • When Demeter refuses to let Hades have her daughter, Persephone shoots back with this:
    Persephone: Jeez, mother, he's had me already!