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How Aquaman Should Have Ended
- After wondering why Batman and Superman are trying to take over his movie, Aquaman realizes that both of them are jealous since not only did his movie was well received but it also made a billion dollars. And to further rub it in their faces, he tells them not only are both of his parents are still alive, his mother is not named "Martha". Cue Batman and Superman going into a Heroic BSoD over this!
How The Meg Should Have Ended
- The Shark from Jaws supporting the protagonist due to be jealous of the Megladon and once the latter is killed, the former turns on the humans.
How Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse Should Have Ended
- Much like the movie condensing Spider-Man's overall comic and movie history into three minutes, the HISHE opens up with Spider-Verse Spidey recounting his previous HISHEs, with the "we don't really talk about this" incident being when he held Batman hostage back in the Amazing Spider-Man 2 HISHE.Spider-Man: Yeah, that one got dark, not gonna lie.
- Miles' Spider-Sense kicks in and he saves his Uncle Aaron AKA "The Prowler" just in time from a gunshot fired by Kingpin.Aaron: Whoa, thanks Miles. You saved my life.
Miles: You're welcome, Uncle Aaron.
Spider-Ham: But you're still going to prison!
Aaron: Aw, man...
- Peter B's cruelly accurate put down of Batman and Superman mocking other people's work when their own recent screen appearances were not very good:Miles: Is that Batman and Superman?
Peter B. Parker: [stage whisper] Yeah, they just sit here all the time and pass judgment on other people's work. It's kinda sad but it's all they've got, so just go along with it. [loud voice] Hey fellas!
- Batman's attempt to be a Caustic Critic ends up failing miserably when he suffers an emotional breakdown and admits that he considers Spider-Verse to be the GOAT of superhero movies, even admiting that Noir is his favorite. Miles, for his part, is both flattered and horrified by Batman getting so emotional.
- Superman claiming that Spider-Man Noir sounds a bit familiar.
- The Fridge Logic of an alternate Kingpin going on a Roaring Rampage of Revenge after the main Kingpin takes his family from an alternate universe is discussed, before an alternate Fisk in white appears in the Villain Pub guns blazing.
- Batman's own idea of a Spider-Verse like event where he hangs out in a cafe with Adam West Batman, Michael Keaton Batman, Val Kilmer Batman, Christian Bale Batman, DCAU Batman and the original Detective Comics Batman that devolves into who should say "Because I'm Batman" that Ben Affleck Batman ("I was Batman!") and even Terry McGinnis join in on. There's also Lego Batman standing on the table.
- Miles showing Batman the shoulder touch.
How Captain Marvel Should Have Ended
- Superman congratulates Carol for doing exactly what the former did in his first movie: saving the Earth and flying out into space. He then reminds her that she needs to smile for the camera to complete the comparisons. She isn't exactly happy with what he suggested.
- When Goose uses its tentacles to swallow Batman's mug, he pulls another one, already filled with coffee, from his utility belt. How Batman managed to carry a cup of coffee on his belt without spilling any is a mystery to us, but definitely not for him. Because he's Batman.
- Fury decides to page Carol during the Chituari invasion in 2012, leading to her annihilating the alien forces, as well as the ship that powers the Chitauri. The Avengers can only look towards the wormhole with confusion as Fury tries to explain himself.Cap: Who the heck was that?!
Fury: Oh! That's uh... that's Captain Marvel. She's kind of the first Avenger.
Cap: I thought I was the first Avenger!
- As soon as Carol makes her departure through the wormhole, the Avengers keep staring, and Iron Man can only say "I'm not sure how I feel about this".
- As to where Carol goes, it's right towards Thanos, still resting on his chair. He can only have a You Have Got to Be Kidding Me! reaction as Carol flies into him.
- In The Stinger, Monica is randomly changing Carol's Kree outfit colour, and she ends up changing the suit itself into Shazam's.note Carol can only panic and beg Monica to change it back to normal.
How Shazam Should Have Ended
- When Superman joins Shazam and Freddy at the lunch table, he's shown with that infamous mustache.Superman: It's a long story.
- And then Batman shows up.Shazam: I thought you quit.Shazam: Wow. That was a really hurtful way of saying that. But, I'm glad you're here.
- Then the rest of the Justice League show up, followed by Billy's foster siblings becoming the Shazam family. But that isn't enough to satisfy the other kids in the cafeteria when they start chanting "Endgame! Endgame! Endgame!", due to the film having taken the spotlight after its release. Batman responds by asking the audience to "shut up and let [them] have this".
- If one looks closely in the crowd of students, the Losers Club can be seen.
Spider-Man Far From Home Trailer
- In addition to Nick Fury and Maria Hill stating why they couldn't contact Thor or Captain Marvel, they shoot down Peter suggesting Black Panther ("He's running a country!"), Hawkeye ("He's got a family!"), Hulk ("He hurt his arm." and "Plus, he doesn't like smashing things anymore."), Bucky, Steve and Falcon.Peter: But what about—Fury: That's it, no more "but"s! Got it?Peter: Yes Mr. Fury.Fury: Alright, let's go to the—Fury: Oh my gosh!Hill: They're too faraway!Peter: What about Doctor Strange then? He can teleport! Or War Machine? Or Scarlet Witch? She almost killed Thanos all by herself! They'd be way better at doing this job than me! (Nick and Maria just look at each other) And what about Valkyrie? She literally has a flying horse! Did you see that thing? I even rode it! I'm still a highschooler!Fury: Fine, you don't wanna do this?! We'll call somebody else!
- And then all the aforementioned heroes show up to face Hydro Man.
- When Peter and Mysterio discuss the multiverse, an offscreen voice says they like to call it the Spider-Verse. Pan over to reveal Miles Morales, Peter B. Parker, Spider-Gwen, Spider-Man Noir, Peni Parker and Spider-Ham.Miles: Hey.
How Aladdin Should Have Ended (1992)
- Aladdin decides to tell Jasmine the truth sooner, which leads to this surprising response.Jasmine: So you inherited royalty without doing anything to earn it?
Jasmine: Sounds exactly like a true Prince to me.
- The Sultan's response is just as funny: "Excellent! You've fallen in love after only one day! How realistic! You two shall be married at once!"
How Avengers: Endgame Should Have Ended
- When Thanos' ship firing missiles at the Avengers HQ, Ebony Maw discovers that none of the occupants were harmed. Thanos is displeased, and orders Ebony Maw to fire on it again. The screams of the Avengers are heard as the HQ erupts into a ball of flame, and it cuts to eight labelled gravestones, with the same bagpipe music heard in Captain America: Civil War's HISHE.Rhodey's grave: NOT TERRENCE HOWARD
Scott's grave: SOME OWNER OF AN UGLY VAN
Clint's grave: ROBIN HOOD BUT GOTH
Rocket's grave: SOMEONE'S PET RACCOON LIKED TO PLAY DRESS UP
Steve's grave: SOME GUY WITH A PATRIOTIC SHIELD
Tony's grave: A MAN WITH A FAT WALLET AND A LIGHT ATTACHED TO HIS CHEST.
Thor's grave: A FAT SLOB
Bruce's grave: A GREEN PERSON APPARENTLY DIED BURNING HIS ARM.
- Thanos gets the Nano Gauntlet and is about to snap his fingers. But instead of Tony's sacrifice, we get this:Thanos: I am inevitable. (prepares to snap)
Groot: (playing his game) I am Groot.
Thanos: I am inevitable.
Groot: I am Groot!
Thanos: I am inevitable!
Groot: I am Groot!
Thanos: I am inevitable!
Groot: I am Groot!
Batman: And I'm... Batman! Awwww snap! (snaps his fingers, and Thanos simply pops like a bubble despite Batman not wearing the gauntlet) Because I'm Batman.
- Falcon has an Oh, Crap! when he realized since he's now the new Captain America, Old Steve sings the Captain America theme song to him just how in the past everyone always made fun of Steve using that song.
- Remember how in the Avengers HISHE, the Avengers were covered in box office money? Here, everyone in the Super Cafe gets crushed by a gigantic pile of box office money. Three separate times.
- The rat that saved Ant-Man is also on the table with them.
- In the "Alternate Version":
- Thor manages to kill Thanos on his farm before he destroyed the Infinity Stones. Ant-Man unshrinks and laments that Thor killed Thanos before he could go up his butt and expand to kill him. Thor is understandably grossed out by this and leaves as Ant-Man rambles about the admittedly more sensible and less disgusting entries like the ear or the mouth.
- Afterwards, there is a funeral for Thanos parodying Tony's, attended by Chucky, Hela, Voldemort, the Joker, Harley Quinn, Electro, Loki (holding the Tesseract), General Zod, Jaws, Cobra Commander, Magneto, Khan, a Xenomorph, a Predator, Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, Freddy Krueger, Pennywise , Maleficent, the T-800, a Dalek, a Cylon, Bane, Poison Ivy, Bowser and Palpatine. And Harley Keener is randomly there as well.
- During the behind the scenes video, the voice of the animator constantly bemoans that there are too many characters in this movie.
- In "How Captain America Should Have Returned the Stones", Captain America is trying to return all the stones and encounters various problems.
- Mind Stone: Has to travel back for Loki's Scepter but otherwise no problems. And he stops to stare at his past self's ass.
- Time Stone: Returns it to the Ancient One immediately after Hulk leaves. Assumes all the others will be as easy.
- Space Stone: Has to travel back for the Tesseract, which is taped back together.
- Power Stone: After knocking out Star-Lord again with Mjolnir, he can't even touch the stone. After Hulk gives him the "ball thingy", he burns his arm putting it back into the force field.
- Reality Stone: Jane runs away from him trying to inject it back inside her. Then he flies halfway across Asgard as Thor, assuming he's Loki, summons Mjolnir.
- Soul Stone: Learns that the Soul Stone's guardian is the Red Skull, much to his shock.Cap: Red Skull?! Son of a- (gets whacked with his own shield)
Deadpool: Uh, uh, uh! Language, Captain!
- Then Cap is finally fed up with everything he had to do to return the stones and just straight up chucks the Soul Stone at the Red Skull before leaving, taking the shield with him, to Deadpool's dismay. And doing a "Whoop whoop whoop!" sound at Deadpool as he's leaving.
How Venom Should Have Ended
- HISHE eats Gilligan by having Doctor Skirth just call the police on Drake.Drake: You don't understand! I'm a scientist! That makes it okay for me to kill people in a lab! I'm not a bad person...
- Speaking of Call Backs, the "Here's a bright idea" scientist from the Spider-Man 3 HISHE returns to reprimand Drake for creating drones that simply slams into things instead of drones that shot missiles or lasers.Drake: Oh my gosh, we're so stupid.
- Speaking of Call Backs, the "Here's a bright idea" scientist from the Spider-Man 3 HISHE returns to reprimand Drake for creating drones that simply slams into things instead of drones that shot missiles or lasers.
- Due to Venom's anti-heroic nature and thus a real lack of place at either the Super Cafe or the Villain Pub, HISHE re-introduced Machete's Chimichangas from the Deadpool 2 HISHE, a food truck frequented by other anti-heroes like Deadpool, The Punisher, John Rambo, Blue the Raptor, and the Bride.
How The Lion King Should Have Ended
- Simba pounces on Zazu...and eats him. Mufasa is appalled by his son's action, but when Simba explains that it's the "circle of life", he agrees before they laugh together.
- While Scar is placing the blame for Mufasa's death on Simba, Mufasa's spirit appears in the clouds and reveals that Scar is the one who killed him. Simba, however, has a question first.Simba: Wait, Dad! You just told me that when we die, we turn into the grass. Why are you in the clouds?Spirit Mufasa: Never mind that right now, Simba.
- He also says what had happened: Scar shoved him into the stampede and is a big jerk.
- Even death doesn't stop Mufasa from arguing with Sarabi over who should have watching Simba.
- Simba gets onto Pride Rock, where he proclaims that he's king now.Spirit Mufasa: Simba, it's too soon!Simba: I told you, I couldn't wait.
- Once Scar is exiled for being revealed to be Mufasa's murderer, he ends up in Timon and Pumbaa's jungle, where he chases the duo over their log.Timon: This lion does NOT wanna Hakuna Matata with us!Pumbaa: He's gonna eat me!Timon: Run, Pumbaa! Run for my life!
How Spider-Man: Far From Home Should Have Ended
- The "Here's a bright idea" scientist from the Spider-Man 3 HISHE makes a comeback, advising Tony not to give E.D.I.T.H. to a hormone-addled teenager like Peter, so he instead gives it to Rhodey.
- Jason Ionello discussing the Fridge Horror coming from Hulk reversing the Snap.
- Peter discovers Mysterio's deception a little too early...Peter: (attempts to touch Mysterio, but finds out he's a hologram) Why are you a ghost?!Mysterio: Whelp, gotta go! (flies away while still in a sitting position) BYYEEE!!!
- This joke is repeated with the fight against Molten Man with Peter wearing a fireman hat with his Night Monkey suit and throwing a jet of water at it from a fire hose.Nick Fury: (disappointed) Now that is some bullcrap.
Maria Hill: Nick Fury wouldn't say "crap."
Nick Fury: Dangit girl, you're gonna give me away!
- This joke is repeated with the fight against Molten Man with Peter wearing a fireman hat with his Night Monkey suit and throwing a jet of water at it from a fire hose.
- The other live-action cinematic Spider-Men and the Spider-Gang aiding Peter in the fight against Mysterio. Highlights include:
- Noir shooting at drones while saying, "Pew, pew, pew."
- Miles using the Venom Strike on a drone while invoking the shoulder touch.
- Maguire Spider-Man performs his infamous upside-down kiss on a drone. And the drone blushes, despite being a robot, before Garfield Spider-Man uppercuts it while riding a skateboard.
- After Mysterio collapses, Spider-Ham offers to check if he's still alive by poking him with a stick.
- At the Villain Pub, Loki calls Mysterio a copy of Syndrome, and Syndrome himself appears to tell Mysterio to go stand next to Aldrich Killian.note
- Followed by Beck saying that they're all just jealous because he's more attractive much to their chagrin (Zod asks "What about Killmonger? I mean me?"), Voldemort saying he's the most attractive before Palpatine tells everyone to be quiet because he's preparing for his return and Joker leaning against Quentin saying "I wish I could quit you."note
- Talos drops his disguise when a swarm of drones appears and shoots him down.
- When Spidey reunites with Batman and Superman at the Super Café, we have this Subverted Catchphrase from Batman:Batman: Because I'm... an adult, and I can handle it.
- Which serves as Foreshadowing that he and Supes are Skrulls, with Batman being Talos in disguise. When Talos drops the disguise and contacts the real Batman:Talos: They don't seem to suspect anything.
Batman: Did you say, "Because I'm Batman"?
Talos: (Beat) No.
Batman: You gotta say, "Because I'm Batman"!
Batman: Because I'm Batman!
Talos: I'm sorry! The opportunity didn't really present itself!
Batman: I seriously doubt that.
Talos: I don't know what to do! They're all gone now!
Batman: Just don't forget next time! Ugh!
- Which serves as Foreshadowing that he and Supes are Skrulls, with Batman being Talos in disguise. When Talos drops the disguise and contacts the real Batman:
- When Peter tells about how he revealed his secret identity to MJ, EDITH tells him to say "Well, I did and I'm awesome, so in your face."
- Peter has E.D.I.T.H. hack J. Jonah Jameson's broadcast to hide his identity as Spidey. Cue Jameson's message being replaced with a corny text-to-speech voice framing him as Spider-Man and calling Spidey a hero, making Jameson angrily fire his staff.
How Godzilla: King of the Monsters Should Have Ended
- Ghidorah, Rodan, and Mothra mocking Godzilla for not being able to fly—only for Godzilla to use his atomic Breath to launch himself ala Godzilla vs. Hedorah and rams himself into the former two.