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    Season 1 

  • In the second episode, chain of custody rules over a case of attempted rape which was foiled by the victim biting her attacker's penis off leads to the immortal line:
    Meredith What am I supposed to do with a penis?
  • In episode 9 of the first season, George contracts Syphilis and undergoes a Humiliation Conga resulting in Meredith giving him a Penicillin injection in his butt with Cristina and Izzy watching to their very great amusement. The best part was when the infection was traced, resulting in George attacking Alex screaming:
    • The fact that the episode's plot centered on the fact that everyone in the hospital staff sleeping around had resulted in a full-blown syphilis outbreak.

    Season 2 

    Season 3 
  • "I Am A Tree",
  • In the Backdoor Pilot for Private Practice ("The Other Side of This Life"), Addison's lampshading of the status of elevators in Grey's Anatomy— first the long monologue about how nice it is to be somewhere where the elevators aren't aphrodisiacs (to a man she's never met), followed by her conversations with the "Elevator Gods". It's made much more hilarious because it is such a lampshade.
  • "Testing 1-2-3":
    • Addison attempts to complain after examining two pregnant woman
      Addison: I am being stalked by pregnant woman.
      Callie: You're an obstetrician.
    • Preston has his bachelor party at Joe's bar, and invites Mark Sloan, Derek, and Addison. Addison notes that she is the only woman present, and says she isn't stripping.
      Derek: That's okay, we've seen it already.
      Mark: True
      Preston: I haven't.

    Season 4 

    Season 5 
  • One of the crash victims in "Dream a Little Dream of Me" has a head injury and her memory resets every 30 seconds. While in the CT scanner, she asks what happened again and Alex proceeds to troll her by telling her she is in a spaceship.
  • In Season 5, Episode 4, Cristina going to Dermatology and being left speechless by how happy everyone is. And then Meredith and Izzie show up, stare, and talk about how much they wish they could be dermatologists.
    • George arrives later to talk them out of it:
    "Dermatologists apply lotion for a living!"
  • During the "domino surgery" mass kidney donation in "There's No "I" In Team", Meredith manages to drop a donor kidney on the floor. Bailey's reaction?
    "Five second rule! Five second rule!"
  • Mark's penile fracture.
  • At the end of "Stairway to Heaven" Meredith goes to William Dun's execution. Afterwards, she can't stop crying and Derek, for lack of a better option, goes to Cristina's house for help.
    Derek: She's in the car and she won't stop crying.
    Cristina: Did you propose?
  • In "I Will Follow You Into The Dark", Alex and his patient engage in some good-natured Interservice Rivalry - she's an Asian and Nerdy band nerd, he is a former wrestler.
    Alex: Nobody made you join the marching band. Its like spreading nerd on nerd.
    Beth: What did you do in highschool?
    Alex: I wrestled.
    Beth: You wearing tights under that lab coat?
  • The hospital finally gets the DaVinci surgical robot in "Here's To Future Days" and Webber invites Bailey to try it out. Bailey gets very excited using it and then:
    Webber: Dr. Bailey, are you making lightsaber noises?

     Season 6 
  • In the season premier, the doctors treat a young woman who lost her arms and a leg in a human-versus-propeller boating accident. Cristina dubs her "Ceviche", and Lexie uses the nickname in an attempt to break the woman out of a funk. Even the patient thinks its funny
    Lexie: People are calling you "Ceviche". You can't go out like that, Clara, with people calling you ceviche.
    Clara: Ceviche?
    Lexie: Yeah. Its a meal. Its...Peruvian, I think. I..its chopped up fish.
    Clara: Its really horrible, isn't it? starts laughing
  • "Tainted Obligation"
    • Alex meets a bear. Izzie later gives him a hard time over it, asking if it was a deer. Karmically, at the end of the episode, Izzie steps out of the trailer and we hear her scream. As she runs back into the trailer, Alex just looks at her.
      Alex: A deer?
      Izzie: We have to move.
    • Derek, Mark and Owen troll Cristina, who is desperate for a surgery, by teasing her with the offer of a complicated, challenging procedure. She jumps at the chance and heads to the patient's room and kicks the other resident out...and discovers the patient is an 82 year old getting a penis pump.
      Paitent: That fella, he was just about to shave me.
  • In "New History", Teddy Altman demonstrates her Fish out of Water status by getting excited over a rainstorm and starts dancing in it.
  • Cristina meeting Alex's brother.
    Cristina: He's so nice! Angel spawn! *to Alex* Why can't you be nice like your brother?
    Alex: *highly annoyed* Why can't you?
    Cristina: Fair enough.
  • After a fisherman gets impaled on his own (very large) hook in "Hook, Line, and Sinner", several characters take the opportunity to make the mandatory jokes in such a situation.
    Webber: Hm, caught a big one, huh?
    later in the OR
    April:After they get him off the hook, we'll go in to evacuate the hemotoma, right?
    Derek: No, I though we'd throw him back in. Catch and release.
  • "How Insensitive"
    • The doctors all get some suspiciously rushed Sensitivity Training from Dr. Bailey, in an attempt to prepare them for the imminent arrival of an obese patient. It goes exactly as well as you would expect.
    • Alex, in a minor miracle, manages to be the only resident Miranda doesn't kick off the case for making jokes, and he promptly starts a betting pool on the man's exact weight. The winner of said pool? Doctor Bailey!
      Lexie: That hypocrite!


     Season 7 
  • "With You I'm Born Again"
    • The residents gather for lunch in the tunnels and Meredith bemoans the fact she still isn't cleared for surgery. This prompts a discussion of what the doctors's alternatives would be:
      Meredith: The two of us are gonna be serving slushies at the multiplex.
      Cristina: Really? I'd choose dermatology over multiplex.
      Jackson: No, I'd go gynecology over dermatology.
      Cristina: Of course you would. Perv.
      Lexie: I think I'd go pysch. everyone looks at her. That was a joke.note 
    • Dr. Bailey returns to the hospital, offers her condolences, and orders Jackson to take care of a bowel impaction
      Bailey: I'm awfully sorry about the loss of your friends....2213 has a bowel impaction and I'm sure as hell not going to stick my hands in there.
  • In "Can't Fight Biology", the obstetrician tells Meredith she has a "hostile uterus". Meredith is irritated by this and complains about it.
  • In the "These Arms of Mine", the Documentary Episode, Alex sings a Justin Bieber song to a young girl who has to have an MRI, to keep her calm during the procedure. The camera pans to show the tech looking at Alex with the funniest look imaginable on his face.
  • In "That's Me Trying", Owen puts the residents through a trauma certification drill, instructing them that they have to keep as many of their dummy patients "alive" as possible and that a "rescue helicopter" will be along in nine minutes. As hours go by with no imaginary helicopter, it becomes clear that this was an Unwinnable Training Simulation. But when April and her group are down to their last two dummies, she flips out and refuses to give up, first claiming that she can hear the helicopter, then stealing a nearby ambulance (which was supposedly "wrecked" due to being part of the accident) and driving them round to the front of the hospital. Owen has to tell her they won to snap her out of it.
  • Everyone thinking that the Middle Eastern patient is Bono because he has guards. From the same episode, Lexie shooting ping-pong balls at everyone, including one of said guards.
    • What was particularly funny about it is that about five seconds earlier, Lexie had confiscated the ping-pong ball gun from Alex (pointing out how phenomenally inappropriate it was) for doing the exact same thing.
    • What really sells it though is the look the guard gives her. Lexie promptly puts the gun on the table and silently puts her hands behind her head as if she was being arrested.
  • In season 7, during Cristina's BSOD arc, she temporarily begins working as a bartender, to hilarious results.
  • In "P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)", Callie informs Arizona and Mark that if they are going to vote on what she does during her pregnancy, Callie gets three votes. One for herself, one for the baby, and one on behalf of the vagina the baby will exit through.
    "Anyone want to argue with my extra special vagina vote?"
  • "I Will Survive": Cristina's patient who was coughing up blood turns out to have a tree growing in his lung.
    Wife: My husband has a what?

     Season 8 
  • Richard's completly out-of-character apparent Ice-Cream Koan in "Heart-Shaped Box" as he tells Cristina that the titular box is the key to her list of dream surgeries.
  • Cristina answering April's phone in a nasally voice for her when Mount Sinai and Case Western call to withdraw their job offers after April fails her boards. Her response to Case Western is especially hilarious:
    Cristina: Well, you know what? I am an awesome surgeon. And I would've rocked your stupid little program so it is your loss. Go to hell!

     Season 9 
  • "Idle Hands" has a lot.
    • Arizona has a new prosthetic leg with a high heel. Callie is very proud of it and thinks it very sexy, as do the ladies. Callie give the guys a one-time pass on commenting on her wife's butt. Richard is the only one to take her up on the offer:
      "Well, I think it's a fine gluteal..." Arizona shushes him.
    • A worried Meredith comes up with all manner of possible conditions that could affect her baby, including "having 11 fingers". Becomes a Brick Joke when she gets an ultrasound and counts 11 fingers.
      Derek: Mm. That's not a finger.
    • In an episode-long Running Gag, everyone wants to try the new LODOX full-body scanner that does a scan in 13 seconds. Heather immediately volunteers to go first, noting that she stuck a marble up her nose when she was a kid and it never came out. She finally gets a chance when its slow...and then a motorcycle accident gets to be first. Heather does, eventually, get a scan at the end of the episode, and does find the marble.
    • Alex and his patient troll Jo's OB/GYN boyfriend Jason the entire episode, paging him all over the hospital on a wild goose chase. Alex even pulls the old phonecall gag, and Jason promptly asks the ER for a "Jenny Talia." Richard catches on, and promptly scolds Alex...for being unoriginal.
  • In "Sleeping Monster" a game of tug of war results in numerous severed fingers, which one unmaimed player collects in a cooler for the hospital
    April: Whoa! That's a lot of fingers!
    Man: Yeah, I counted six.
    Callie: No, five. This one is a turkey dog.
    • This is followed by Jackson walking around with five fingers each in their own dish of ice trying to match them, looking like some twisted parody of a waiter.
  • "Readiness Is All"
    • Paramedics bring in a construction worker impaled on rebar, April and Leah meet them.
      Leah: Let his name be Bob, please let his name be Bob.
      April: Why?
      Leah: Shishka-Bob!

     Season 10 
  • "Throwing it All Away"
    • Stephanie accidentally knocks over Arizona with a gurney, breaking her good prosthetic. Later, Paramedic Nicole arrives with a "possibly enchilada related" chest pain patient and comments on Steph's "bowling for doctors". Nicole then recommends April as a good second target, at which point Stephanie immediately rams Jackson.
      Nicole: That'll work too.
    • Stephanie leaves the ER to sarcastic applause, and someone calls "Two for two!"
    • Alex walks in on Arizona with her leg off and reacts like she's naked, hastily turning around to give her privacy.
  • "Everything I Try to Do, Nothing Seems to Turn Out Right"
    • The patient who survived cancer that left her with no control over her anal sphincter. Audible flatulent sounds are heard throughout her scenes. She had been a ballerina but had to abandon her career because her last attempt at dancing "was like freakin' spin art!" They come up with a solution: Constructing a magnetic sphincter.
      Patient: So you want to give me a bionic butthole?

     Season 11 
  • In "Don't Let's Start", Derek says he want Mer to accept Maggie as family because he had a big family and it's good. Also, she can help with Zola's hair:
    "Zola needs more black people in the family because I'm running out of ways to do her hair and Bailey won't show me anymore."
  • "Could We Start Again Please" is as hilarious as it is heartwarming. Maggie, Callie, and Meredith are over at the house Alex bought from Meredith. As they raise a glass to George's memory, Callie mentions having married George. This prompts some relating of old flings, and Callie realizes something.
    Callie: Oh God. We're all related through sex. We all have sexual relations, that is horribly weird.
  • In "When I Grow Up", Stephanie spends much of the episode attracted to one of the school trip chaperones. Eventually, she works up the courage to ask him out. It turns out he's 17 years old and helping out his little sister's class. Smash cut to the bar, where Jo is laughing her ass off as Steph is downing shots.
  • Catherine's marriage proposal to Webber. She lampshades how what she is doing is going against everything she believes, but she is willing to do it anyway, because she loves him, and because this kind of romantic gestures are a part of what he is, and by doing so she tells him that she accepts him and that she is willing to take the leap. Her gesture is so over the top and unexpected (she makes her declaration in the middle of the hospital, with roses and candles everywhere) that it is already quite funny in itself. But what tops it is Richard's answer:
    Richard: (deadpan) About damn time!
  • "Time Stops/ You're My Home"
    • Despite his critical injuries and being stuck in a car, Keith manages a sense of humor.
      He arrives at the hospital via flatbed still trapped in his car, Meredith greets him
      Keith: Thanks for having me over.
      the roof is removed and doctors crowd around
      Meredith: How do you feel?
      Keith: Popular.
    • As Amelia and Owen discuss Meredith selling the Dream House, they ponder where they'll move
      Owen: Maybe I should get a house that doesn't get parking tickets.
      Amelia: Come on. You won't miss being able to reach your toaster from your toilet?


     Season 12 
  • Attracted to a female firefighter patient, Arizona asks Richard for advice on how to find out if she's interested.
    Richard: Well, I guess you could write a note on corners and I can try to pass it to her.
    Richard: Of course it is!
  • Following Meredith's attack in "The Sound of Silence", Miranda is concerned:
    Miranda: The last time that woman got hurt working for this hospital, she purchased this hospital.
  • "My Next Life"
    • Katie Bryce, Meredith's first patient, returns to the hospital. And immediately give Mer a hard time over getting lost.
      Meredith: It was my first day!
    • Meredith reminds Bailey, who remembers the girl as well. She notes that Derek had the interns chasing their tails to figure it out...and was chasing Meredith's tail. Mer agrees with a grin.
  • "When It Hurts So Bad"
    • Catherine Avery notes the terrible weather on the East Coast, prompting some snark from Jackson.
      Catherine: It is so cold and sleeting back east - just dreadful!
      Jackson: So you came to Seattle for some sun?
      Catherine: I came to Seattle for my son.
    • Ben and Stephanie's whole Hot Skitty-on-Wailord Action discussion after a small Asian woman dislocates both hips after her much larger partner slipped.
      Ben: I met a puppy once that was half German Shepard, half Teacup Chihuahua. And all I could think did you happen?
      Stephanie: I once watched this monster truck crush this two-seater convertible at an intersection, and the truck barely had a scratch on it, but the convertible was totaled.
      Ben: I mean, logistically, if the Chihuahua is the dad, does he just hop up on the German Shepard mom?
      Stephanie: Ashley was just out for a joyride with her top down and then bam - head-on collision.
      Ben: Or is the German Shepard the dad and they give a ladder to the Chihuahua mom so that he can reach her?

     Season 13 

     Season 14 
  • A newly single Arizona hooks up with a gorgeous Italian woman at a bar. Andrew returns home to find them on the couch half-naked. He's about to leave but stops and he and the woman start to have a raging argument in Italian as Arizona just sits there, utterly baffled as she looks from one to the other.
    • It turns out Arizona's date is none other than Andrew DeLuca's sister, Carina DeLuca. Andrew leaves as his sis tells Arizona her real name. Then they go back to making out on the couch.
    • The next day, Arizona is still happy about this, thinking it was just a fun one-night stand...and then discovers that Carina is doing research at Grey Sloan.
  • Carina wants to do a study and Bailey sums up "you want to let a patient masturbate just so you can monitor their brain?" As it happens, Bailey has been annoyed at having to wear heels all day and lets the woman do it.
    • Becomes a Brick Joke when the hospital is hacked
      Carina: I thought my last patient had the saddest climax I've ever seen but it's just the screen was frozen.
  • Black Comedy as Meredith tries to have the interns find an abdomen she can use for a female transplant. One shows her a woman who's been dead for three days ("Is that a problem?"); the second shows someone who has had a shotgun blast to the abdomen ("you can't fix it?") and the third has a man and just looks confused why Meredith walks away.
  • "Come On Down To My Boat":
    • A woman who was visiting her boyfriend in jail is brought in complaining of abdominal pains, leading to the suspicion she is pregnant. During the check, a gunshot suddenly erupts from her stomach and the bullet hits another patient in the leg. Everyone is freaking out trying to figure out the source until...
      Arizona: Did you...put a your vagina?
      (after a pause, the woman slowly nods as everyone just stares in wide-eyed disbelief. Black Comedy at its finest)
    • Arizona then makes the Obligatory Joke after extracting the pistol.
      "Congratulations, everyone. It's a beautiful one pound eight pistol."
    • The guys take the day off to hang out on Jackson's new boat...where they prompting get into a knot-tying competition and compete to fillet fish. Ben starts geeking out over a salmon's two-chambered heart.
  • "Personal Jesus"
    • April is already having an awkward time with a frantic, screaming pregnant woman when her husband shows up...Matthew, the paramedic April left at the altar to run off with Jackson.
      Woman: This is April? (starts to scream even louder)
    • Paul, hospitalized with a concussion, tries to attack Jo and Jenny and gets a second concussion. As the doctors discuss who is legally responsible for him now, Jo realizes that their divorce was never finalized and she is Paul's next of kin. Jo starts laughing hysterically, apologizes, and keeps laughing.
    • April is dealing with a young man who tried to cut off his hand to stop masturbating, and everyone gets some good lines.
      April: Yeah, well, the Bible also says that God doesn't tempt us beyond our ability. He doesn't give us more than we can handle.
      Vik: I think handling it was his problem.
      April: When God created the world, he also created metaphors.
    • Richard ultimately solves the issue by having Carina talk to the man. Carina, true to form, is happy to inform the paitent of all the benefits of masturbation and points out that God made masturbation pleasurable for a reason.
  • In “(Don’t Fear) the Reaper”, Ben is buying hot dogs on the street when he gets a call from Webber about Miranda Bailey's situation. In his panic, he drops the hot dogs and runs off. What makes this funny is that the camera focuses on the hot dogs.
  • Jackson is dealing with his mother wanting to take part in a genitalia operation as "you have no filter."
    Catherine: Come on, my birthday is coming up. Think of this vagina as your gift to me.
    Jackson: Now, I'm going to smash my head in with a hammer to forget you just said that.
  • "Games People Play":
    • In a truly twisted but hilarious moment, April is carefully draining a hematoma in the ear of a rugby team manager. A nearby player throws a ball which bounces off a desk, is deflected by a moving stretcher to hit April...who then accidentally cuts off the woman's ear. Her look of horror is utterly priceless and that's before Deluca slips on the ear like a banana peel to knock himself out, at which point the patient finally realizes her ear's been cut off.
    • While Bailey and Richard are discussing the event with the legal team Alex walks in asking to give his 12 year old patient medical marijuana, everyone's face is priceless.
      Alex: I want to give my 12-year-old patient authorization for medical marijuana.
      Everyone just looks at him
      Bailey: Karev, have you met the Grey Sloan legal team?
    • Richard and Bailey meet the teen's father, who starts talking about all the technical stuff of the surgery. Bailey smugly asks if the guy is a doctor and he replies he's not...he's a medical malpractice lawyer. Bailey's smile freezes as Richard executes a Screw This, I'm Outta Here
    • And at the end of the night, Bailey and Richard are seen watching security footage of the whole thing and laughing their heads off.
    • Early in the same episode two interns hear discussion for a game night between the doctors but aren't sure if they're invited. At the end of the episode after the game night has ended they show up, Maggie just shuts the door in their face.
  • In "Judgement Day", right before a big presentation event, Arizona shares with everyone cookies she got from a patient...which are filled with medical pot. Hilarity Ensues.
  • "Bad Reputation". Alex is brought in to check on a patient...whose mother is Olivia, the nurse he infected with syphilis way back in the first season. It takes him a moment to recognize her as she puts her hands over her young son's ears and asks if Alex is still doing it or "moved on to gonorrhea?"
    • Olivia then spends the rest of the episode trolling Jo.
  • Alex and Jo's wedding is a comedy of errors.
    • First, Jackson, Maggie, Bailey, Ben, Richard, Catherine and various interns are all at a church, curious as to how Alex and Jo have so many friends they've never seen. It's only when the bride walks down the aisle that they realize they're at the wrong wedding. They try to sneak out with Levi "Glasses" Schmitt tripping. Bailey is almost out the door...and then the bride's mother suddenly collapses.
    • Amelia finds Meredith drinking and downcast and jumps to one conclusion: "You're secretly in love with Alex!"
      • She later asks if it's Jo Meredith is in love with.
    • Breaking tradition, Jo and Alex sneak into a barn for a "quickie" and get locked inside.
    Jo: I'm gonna scream now, ok?
    • Alex manages to break a window in time for Jo to realize the barn has a skeleton in it.
    Jo: He was an organ donor.
    Alex: I think that ship has sailed.
    • Deluca asks which side is for someone "who was in love with the bride before the groom beat him up?"
    • Teddy shows up at the hospital, fresh off a 12-hour flight and wondering where everyone is. Without a moment's hesitation, Bailey tells her to scrub in for a surgery.
    • Jackson and Matthew finally have a talk on how April left Matthew at the altar to run off with Jackson but is now back with him. Matthew admits he's a Christian but wants to punch Jackson.
    Jackson: Would it make you feel better if I told you I just lost a quarter of a billion dollars?
    Matthew: Yes. Yes, it would.
    Jackson: Happy to help.
    • The wedding planner pulls a drunken Deluca to do a speech. He starts ranting on his past with Jo and Alex before he's dragged off. The planner then announces that she accidentally ate some shrimp and is having an allergic reaction.
    • Meredith gives Deluca a pep talk and he kisses her. He's sorry about it as he realizes "this was not a seduction."
    Deluca: Am I fired?
    Meredith: No. But I am flattered.
    • The gang do their best to help the wedding planner out, including cutting open her throat. The sight of the blood makes Glasses faint...right onto the wedding cake.
  • Bailey's entry into the surgical innovation contest is a hydro colonospy device she calls the "Trailblazer". After Meredith dubs it the "Tailblazer", Bailey realizes the device's alternative uses and contracts with a sex toy company to make it.

     Season 15 
  • "With a Wonder and a Wild Desire"
    • Alex and Jo are on their honeymoon at the beach. The sheer incongruity of bright sunshine forcing them to wear sunglasses and Jo in a bikini is jarring.
    • Jo ditches Alex when she gets a brainwave, leaving Alex to sit with her sandcastle. He later finds her at the bar scribbling notes on napkins, and the sympathetic bartender hands him a beer on the house.
    • A patient comes in with something up his butt which he insists is a "growth", prompting some snark from the doctors. Moves to Mood Whiplash when Vik inadvertently detonates what turns out to hairspray, burning himself and mortally wounding the patient.
      Carina: Are we taking bets on what this is?
      Richard: I'm going with a candle.
      Vik: My money's on shampoo bottle.
      Carina: Flashlight.
      Richard: You know, that one is strangely popular...
  • "Broken Together": Dahlia spends the entire episode trying to find a dog loose in the hospital. The first time she finds it, someone else lets it loose, sending her on another chase.
    "Third in my class!..."
  • In "Girlfriend in a Coma", Maggie suggests they leave a New Year's Eve party early
    • At a New Year's Party, Maggie sugests they leave early:
    Jackson: The ball hasn't even dropped yet.
    Maggie: The ball can drop in our bed.
    Beat, Jackson looks at her
    Maggie: ...I did not mean that to sound so graphic.
  • Alex is in a rush to get to a party at Jacksons's and when told "Mrs. Karev" is in the waiting room, he tells his assistant to tell her to meet him at Jackson's place...unaware that this "Mrs. Karev" is his mother.
  • Megan is at first ecstatic to hear Teddy has had Owen's baby, assuming they finally got together. As soon as she hears it was a one-night stand and Tom walks in to talk about the house he's found for Teddy to buy, Megan just laughs while berating her brother as a "dum dum."
  • Amelia is hiding in an X-Ray room and ranting about her sex life. Maggie spins her chair around to reveal Bailey standing in the doorway with a trio of young students there for a class project.
    • Minutes later, Catherine is upset to find a solider has lied about having a "support system" for an artificial graft. She marches out, declaring to everyone "I am not giving that man a penis today!" Cue Bailey and the kids.
    Bailey: Any questions about urology? (kids all raise their hands)
  • As Meredith is taking responsibility for insurance fraud, Alex and Richard come in and have their I Am Spartacus moment. Meredith tries desperatly to shut them up and Bailey is furious, reminding them that they're not interns and that this is not an LVAD wire. The way the whole scene plays out is just hilarious.

     Season 16 

  • Going into labor, Teddy is less freaked out about the pain and more upon learning that Owen had a fling with Carina.
    • Carina asks Teddy to "spread your legs for me" on the table. Teddy and Owen just give her "you had to pick those words?" looks.
  • Amelia comes to see Carina, who notes the "fullness of her breasts" and other changes in her body and had been wondering if Amelia would come see her. Amelia assumes Carina is hitting on her and is glad to hear that the feeling is mutual, as she'd had a crush on Carina for a while.
    Carina: Amelia, are you here for your pregnancy or just asking for a menage à trois?
Carina watches Amelia as she talks through it and realizes that she is, in fact, pregnant.
  • A pair of sisters are heartbroken to be brought in as their other sister was found in a pit, her face so mangled that she could only be identified by her purse ID. After hours of tears, they agree to pull the plug on the brain-dead woman, tearfully telling her "go into the light." At which point, one sister's cell phone rings and to her shock, it turns out it's their actual sister. One blurts "you mean her spirit?" only to be told she's alive. The two leap back as they realize they've spent the last few hours crying over a complete stranger and purse thief.
    Haylee: Plug her back, plug her back in!
    Webber: Well, it's a little late now!
    Haylee: (to woman) Do not go into the light! Don't head for the light!
    (Webber just throws up his hands and walks out)
  • Jo insists on working at a hospital...on Halloween...dressed as a corpse bride.
  • Jo is at home with a baby she was supposed to have taken to the hospital. When there's a knock at the door, she's freaked out and worried about cover stories. When she hears it's Meredith, she relaxes and lets her in.
    Meredith: Oh, you stole a baby? Me too once.
    Lincoln: Why are people stealing babies?!
    Meredith: So you wanted to make sure he didn't grow up with a crappy life like you did.
    Jo: See, she gets me!
    Meredith: Well, I'm a convicted felon.

     Season 17 
  • Jackson is surprised to find Victoria at his doorstep in a long coat while she's surprised he's with his toddler. It turns out Victoria misinterpreted his text of "come on over if you've got nothing on" for a hookup and is naked under her coat.
  • Meredith spends most of the season unconscious in a hospital bed, having become victim to the COVID-19 Pandemic. This actually results in a number of cameo appearances from former characters, who appear in her fever-dream hallucinations: George (TR Knight), Lexie (Chyler Leigh), Mark (Eric Dane) and Derek "McDreamy" Shepherd (Patrick Dempsey) drop in at various times. But one cameo is sold solely by SMS messaging and Kevin McKidd's Facial Dialogue:
    Cristina: Update???
    Owen: (sighs) No update, she's good.
    Cristina: That's still an update. Send pics of her monitors.
    Owen: "Okay..." (types) Cristina, I know how to read her monitors.
    Cristina: I don't care.
    Owen: (gives up, takes picture)

[[folder: Season 18]]

     Season 19 
  • Benson and Mika commiserate over their supervising Attendings.
    Benson: [Dr. Ndugu]'s married to Dr. Pierce...and there are clearly issues.
    Mika: Ah, do they back-seat drive each other's rectals?
    Benson:...What is that a euphemism for?
    Mika: Nothing. I literally just experienced that with Dr. Altman and Dr. Hunt.
    Benson: Why is everyone married to each other?
    Mika: Because doctors have no lives and no time to meet normal people.
    • Speaking of which, the rectal in question happened because Owen is suspended from practising medicine unsupervised and Teddy is pissed at him for landing himself in that situation. Also, the item lodged in the patient's rectum was his wife's phone because he got sick of her using it so much.
  • At the end of the episode, Jules tries to bond with the other new interns by handing out stuffed animals from the gift shop. After a brief heartwarming moment where she explains studies showing that they can help relieve stress regardless of the person's age, she tells them that they each owe her twelve dollars for them.


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