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Funny / Gladiator

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  • The Colosseum announcer's wig and eyebrows.
  • When Maximus is looking at the dolls of his wife and son. Juba approaches and asks what he is telling them.
    Maximus: To my son, I tell him I will see him again soon. To keep his heels down while riding his horse. To my wife..... that is not your business.
  • Proximo greets his trader by grabbing his balls and complaining about the giraffes he was sold not breeding
    Proximo: Those giraffes you sold me. They won't mate. They just...walk around in circles. You sold me...queer giraffes. I want my money back.
    • We catch a glimpse of them later.
  • Proximo to his caravan: "Come on! How long does it take to get into my own house!"
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  • Before the first arena fight, the slave chained to Hagen pisses himself in sheer terror. Maximus, behind him, notices this... and shuffles backward.
  • When Maximus is served his daily gruel after revealing himself, he sits down with his friends, who wordlessly advise him against eating it. Hagen, the big German, taste tests it, and immediately begins choking before cracking up.
  • Maximus looks amused and offended when young Lucius expresses surprise at how small big buff brawny Maximus is in person.
    Lucius: They said you were a giant.
  • During the reenactment of the Battle of Carthage, when Maximus gets a sword and twirls it around, Commodus goes "whoo hoo" while waving his hands and head about.
    • His reaction after the battle, in which the "Barbarian Horde" utterly trounced the "Roman Legionaries":
    Commodus: My history's a little hazy Cassius, but shouldn't the barbarians lose the Battle of Carthage?
  • Commodus' leer at Maximus being branded 'Maximus the Merciful' following his fight with Tigris quickly becoming the source of another tantrum.
  • A Black Comedy example, during the opening battle with a decapitated messenger's head thrown back at them. Maximus replied "They say no".
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