- Everything to do with the Digital Conveyor, everything.(After beaming up the pig-lizard)
Jason: What? What was that?
Alex: Uh, nothing.
Jason: I heard some squealing or something.
Gwen: Oh, no. Everything's fine.
Teb (as if the others have somehow overlooked this fact): But the animal is inside out.
(all humans in the Conveyor room glare at Teb)
Jason: I heard that! It turned inside out?
Teb: (not moving despite being covered in Ludicrous Gibs) And it exploded.
Jason: It turned inside out, and then it exploded?
Gwen: (resigned) Hold, please...
- Jason trying to prevent Alex from abandoning the convention at the beginning of the film.
- Gwen's indignation at having to go through the deadly corridor: "Well, forget it! I'm not doing it! This episode was badly written!"
- Any of Alex' irritable Serious Actor moments.Alex: You're just going to have to figure out what it wants. What is its motivation?Jason: It's a rock monster. It doesn't have motivation!Alex: See, that's your problem, Jason. You were never serious about the craft!
Alexander: I am... a rock. I just want to be... a rock. Cold, still, and peaceful...
- The deleted version of that scene is even better, as it involves Alex using method acting to give Jason an idea.
- Plus a Fun with Subtitles gag on the film's DVD when the rock-monster goes flying off into the vacuum of space.. happy and content because finally all the noises have stopped.
- When they've landed the shuttle, and Guy is at the height of his nervous breakdown while Fred goes to open the door:Guy: Wait, don't open that! It's an alien planet! Is there air? You don't know! (inhales loudly and holds his breath)
Fred: (sniffs a few times, exhales) Seems okay.
- Guy's breakdown itself, in which he appears to forget that he actually does have a last name:Jason: You're not gonna die on the planet, Guy.
Guy: I'm not? Then what's my last name?
Jason: It's, uh, uh- -I don't know.
Guy: Nobody knows! Do you know why? Because my character isn't important enough for a last name, because I'm gonna die five minutes in!
Gwen: Guy, you have a last name.
Guy: DO I?! DO I?!
Guy: For all you know, I'm just "Crewman Number Six"! (breaks down weeping) Mommy... mommy...
Alexander: Are we there yet?
- Guy's breakdown itself, in which he appears to forget that he actually does have a last name:
- When the cast is first being shown around the ship:Mathesar: The medical quarters are to the left...
Tommy: What the hell is going on?!!?
Alexander: Jason, what have you gotten us into?
Gwen: I don't believe this, it's insane.
Fred: Wow, the floors are so clean.
Kwan: Did you see that? That door stuck a little bit there, I'll get one of my boys down here with a can of WD-40...
- Especially funny given the 'screensaver' on the Special Features screen, of a Thermian sweeping and then licking a floor. Okay, he licks a finger that he rubbed on it, but essentially the same.
- Even funnier knowing that Fred Kwan was played by Tony Shalhoub.
- And then near the end of the film, where Kwan has just spaced one of Sarris's men who had been ready to do the same to them.
- When the actors are first trying to explain that Galaxy Quest was just a show.Gwen: I mean, surely you don't think Gilligan's Island is—
[chorus of mournful exclamations from the Thermians]
Mathasar: Those poor people.note
- Fred's whole personality, especially given his later series.
- Clearing out the control room:Fred: Besides, [cackles] I just had an interesting idea.
Guy: Are you stoned?
(cue rock monster)
Fred: [watching Gorignak whaling on the alien goons with a beatific smile, one arm around Guy and one around his girlfriend, with identical expressions] It's the simple things in life you treasure.
- Guy's reaction to Fred and Lailari's, er... public display of affection: "Oh! That's not right."
- On the way out of the spacedock, Laredo manages to scrape the entire ship against the side of the docking bay. Everyone on the bridge cringes as an almighty "EEEEEEEE" echoes through the hull.
- After uber-fan Brandon has spent a solid 30 seconds explaining how he realizes it's only a show, and the whole thing is fiction...Jason: Brandon, Brandon! ...it's all real.
Brandon: Oh, my God! I Knew It!!
- (Alexander, poor in tone but rich in self-loathing) "By Grabthar's hammer... what a savings."Seanbaby: Alan Rickman can pack so much tragedy, rage, injustice and disgust into a single line that you'd swear it was a McRib.
- The lead up is great too. the other actors say their lines, then there's a big pause as they motion Alexander to go. Eventually, Gwen nudges Alexander, who reacts to acknowledge. Then there's a close-up shot of Alexander suffering that goes for a long time before he finally utters the line.
- This damage report from Tech Sgt Chen.
- Then there was the aftermath where Chen got the engineering crew to group hug.
- This takes place during the climax of the film when Sarris transports to the ship and starts killing off the crew, forcing Jason to activate the Omega 13. The camera makes a point of showing a close-up of the faces of all the main characters who get shot, and that the Earth is getting very big in the window: chilling stuff. But then, right before Jason pushes the Big Red Button to set off the potential universe-ending bomb, the camera shows Guy right in the middle of the line of fire, still alive... after he's been complaining the whole movie about the fact that he's doomed. Plucky Comic Relief indeed!
- When the crew are first beamed aboard the ship, every one of them is completely frozen in horror at what just happened. Except for Fred, who doesn't seem to be the slightest bit traumatized by the experience.
A Thermian: Our most sincere apologies. We forgot about our appearance generators.
- "That was a helluva thing."
- There's Guy's Delayed Reaction to being surrounded by the Thermians in their other, more alien forms.
Jason: You guys came! Who wants the grand tour?
Guy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! ....ahhh!
Jason: ...Anyone else?
- Gwen: My TV Guide interview was six paragraphs about my boobs, and how they fit into my suit!
- Sigourney Weaver playing a bimbo is one big CMOF in itself.
- "There's a... red thingy... moving towards the... green thingy... I think we're the green thingy..."
- When Jason first calls Sarris:Jason: Hey Sarris, how're you doing?Sarris: (shows the head of his lieutenant mounted on a stick) Better than my lieutenant!
- After Jason barks out a series of orders to the crew and insults to the bad guy Sarris, including "he's as stupid as he is ugly" while Gwen is busy trying to get his attention...Jason: Gwen, put me back on with him.
Gwen: That's what I've been trying to tell you, you are back with him.
Sarris: Perhaps I'm not as stupid as I am ugly, commander.
Jason: (to Gwen) I gave you the [swipes finger across his throat pointedly] 'kill' gesture.
Gwen: No, you gave me the 'we're dead' signal. I was agreeing with you. Like I know where the hold button is.
- Adding to this is a brief cut of Alexander face-palming despairingly.
- During the first engagement with Sarris, Gwen inadvertantly begins to re-embrace her old role on the show.Ship Computer: Enemy is matching velocity.Gwen: Enemy is matching velocity!Alexander: We heard it the first time!Gwen: Oh God, I'm doing it. I'm repeating the darn computer.
Computer: Negative, there is no replacement Beryllium Sphere on board.
- Later on...
Gwen: [to crew] No, there is no replacement Beryllium Sphere on board.
Tommy: You know, that is really getting annoying!
Gwen: [Suddenly SHOUTING!] Look! I have one job on this lousy ship, it's stupid, but I'm gonna do it! Okay!?
Tommy: [leaning away from Gwen] Sure, no problem.
- After everyone telling Guy he isn't going to die on the mining planet. The moment the children aliens kill one of their own, Gwen gets this golden line: "Let's go before one of those things kills Guy!"
Guy: Are we doing episode 81?
- Within a minute after Guy hears that line, the team starts thinking up a plan.... Like that one they did on episode 81? Guy turns white and interrupts the group's brainstorming.
Jason: [very irritated] It's just a rough plan Guy, what difference does it make if it's episode 81 or not?!
Guy: Because I died... ON EPISODE 81!!!!
- Jason and the rock monster: "Go for the mouth or its throat, its vulnerable spots!" "It's a rock, it doesn't have any vulnerable spots!"
Guy: I know! You construct a weapon... look around you, can you form some sort of rudimentary lathe...? [promptly dragged away from the communicator]
- The incomparable:
Jason: A lathe?! Get off the line, Guy!!
- "Alex, where are you going?" (Beat) "To see if there's a pub!"
- A fangirl faints seeing Jason and Gwen kiss.
- Brandon gives a geeky, technobabble explanation of what his plans are, and his mother's response is to remind him when dinner is. Once he leaves, she notes to his father, "Well he's outside." While hilarious, her reaction is more-or-less how most Real Life supportive parents handle their fanchild.
"Mother, I cannot stress enough to you the severity of Commander Taggart's situation! I must get to-""Don't forget the recyclables!"
- The part where Brandon's line goes dead on Jason in a life-or-death situation, and the movie then cuts to Brandon hurriedly taking out the trash at the insistence of his mom.
- "You broke the ship. You BROKE THE BLOODY SHIP!"
- The DVD has three audio options, with the first two being whether you want it in standard or surround stand... And the last of them being to watch the film in the Thermian language.
- Tommy letting out a high-pitched scream after breaking his arm. He continues screaming as Mathesar carries him off to medical quarters.
- "You remember yesterday at the convention? Those people dressed like aliens? They were aliens! They were termites, or dalmatians! I don't remember 'cause I was pretty hungover!"
- During Jason's Shirtless Scene, Alexander snarks "I see you managed to get your shirt off."
- Even better: according to George Takei, they actually said that about William Shatner (who Jason is an Affectionate Parody of) whenever Kirk's fight scene resulted in shirtlessness.
- Brandon rallying his friends to bring their nerdy knowledge to assist Jason and the rest of the crew.Kyle: Hey Brandon, what's up?Brandon: No time for pleasantries Kyle, we have a Level 5 Emergency!
- Just as Sarris finds out that the crew have escaped, one of the two Mooks that got blasted out of the airlock earlier smacks against the ship's windshield.
- After Alexander has his Big Damn Hero moment, the Thermians cry out, "He saved us! Commander Taggert has saved us!"Alexander: (sighing) It just isn't fair.
- When the crew lands on the mining planet and spot the seemingly empty facility, Gwen wonders where the miners are. A few moments later, after they see the alients that look like children:Alexander: Could they be the miners?Fred: Oh, sure. They're, like, three years old.[everyone turns to stare at Fred]Alexander: [incredulous] Miners, not minors!Fred: ...You lost me.
- A hungover Jason tells the Thermians that "mum's the word", at which they start repeating the word with a variety of lengths and inflections.
- At the finale, when Saris stumbles out of the crashed Protector into the convention, some of the fans shoot their Nerf guns at him.
Funny / Galaxy Quest