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Funny / Frozen Hearts

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  • Heins asking "Is it true?" and the revelation that he's asking about the condition of the suit he designed for Hans.
  • Hans cross-dressing as Princess Orion, enabling himself to get out of the castle for a little while and Heins to avoid having to spend the day with Orion.
  • In a darkly comedic moment, Harken's proposal for how to deal with Hans.
    Harken: I could whip him. I've only just procured the most marvelous cat of nine tails. Glass shards imbedded in the leather, guaranteed to cleave flesh with each stroke. (gets a Slasher Smile)
    Helm: That is not an option.
    Horatio: The last man father placed you in charge of whipping died the next day.
    Harken: Exactly. That should tell you how much I need the practice.
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  • The entire idea of a pirate and a prince of Arendelle who is said pirate's captain having an Embarrassing Nickname for each other.
  • Anna's threat to Hans:
    Anna: You stay back! *Grabs frying pan* I've got a-a...big skillet! And I'm not afraid to use it, either.
  • Hell, the whole of Chapter 12 could count:
    • First, Anna attacks Heins when he was trying to bow to her.
    Heins: Your highness-
    Kristoff: Great, you see? Now you've done it!
    Kristoff: Has he got a thick skull? Anna, don't worry about these guys attacking you, worry about whether or not you gave him brain damage from that frying pan! He wasn't trying to startle you, he was trying to bow.
    Anna: Oh...*taps mittens together* Oops.
    • Anna's apology, following that:
    Anna: I'm Princess Anna, of Arendelle, and I'm sorry for throwing a pan at you.
    Anna: I know! Oh, I know! I've got it! The Winter Gala!
    Heins: Winter Gala? You mean a party?
    Anna: Ohhh it's what I wanted to tell you, Kristoff! Elsa and I were talking and we decided that to make people feel better about the situation, we're gonna hold a huge ball! Well, OK, she didn't exactly say yes, but I've got her on the ropes!
    Kristoff: A BALL? Anna, are you sure that's a good idea? You'll need more then a few days to plan that.
    Anna: I know, I know, but I've already got the basics figured out! We'll have soup, roast and-
    Anna: YES!
    Heins: Wait wait wait. Would it be at the castle? With the woman in ballgowns and the men and suits and music and dancing and those little tiny appetizers you have to pick up with the toothpicks in them?
    Anna: Absolutely!
    Heins: Please pinch me! Pinch me, somebody, I'M DREAMING! I'm going to a party thrown by the queen and princess of Arendelle! Oh my god! *Gasps* WHAT WILL I WEAR?
    • When the two brothers are riding in a carriage through the marketplace:
    Heins: Hans! HANS! Look at that; they're actually hanging the fish in the air like a banner or flag, and awwww it's so cute, look at the little tiny ones-
    • And when Hans suggests his plan:
    Heins: You mean we'll have to live like...peasants?
    Hans:...I'm afraid so.
    Heins: That's great! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE A PEASANT!
    • When the brothers get out:
    Heins: Do I have to go down the way with all the baked goods they're bringing out? I'm hungry...
    Kristoff: *Fishes in his pocket and hands him a carrot* Here. It's not much, but it's all I've got with me.
    Heins: Thanks! *Notices Sven* Awww, do you want some, too? *Takes bite and hands it to Sven, who thanks him* You don't have to thank me, you deserve it for pulling us all the way here!
    • When Heins leaves:
    Heins: Alright, I'm ready! Good luck, Ha-I mean, whoever you are!
    Hans: We are doomed.
  • Chapter 16:
    Heins: *On Hans's new suit* Oh, just wait until the ladies see you tonight! You're going to turn so many heads everyone is going home with whiplash. Now take it off and hang it up for anticipation.
  • This. Especially the food fight.


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