Funny / Fire Emblem Gaiden

"Alm, no." "Alm, yes." "Alm, pls."

• In the original Gaiden, the Brigands' sprite animation has them flailing their axes left and right, making it look like they are dancing to the music.
• Almost any exchange between Gray and Tobin. One from early in the game when Alm suggests storming the southern fort to rescue Clair.
  Gray: ...Listen, just stop and think about this. I know it's hard, but try. Clair is a GIRL. And if we save a GIRL... Eh? You follow?
  Tobin: I can't believe you're the same man who mocks the fact that I fight for gold.
  • Honestly, almost anything out of Gray's mouth in general, thanks to his new personality combined with Max Mittelman's delivery. Another good example is one of his possible base conversations, starting in Act 3:
    Gray:^note (referring to Alm and Celica's argument) How do I know it's all women? Hey, I've been to a town! I've seen, like... a dozen women! Hell, maybe even more!
• When you enter the first dungeon in the game in Echoes, there's a thief at the entrance... who promptly freaks out the moment he sees you and screams like a little girl before running for his life. The voice acting and his line are priceless.
  Brigand: I'm only the stupid watchman! I just watch things!
  • If the player leaves the Thieves' Shrine before defeating the Brigand Boss for whatever reason and then comes back, the watchman will return... and he will once again freak out and flee. He must be pretty bad at his job.
  • Not to mention this:
    Message: The brigand has fled. ...Again.
• Likewise, Mae and Boey are Those Two Guys for Team Celica. It's made even better by there being a veneer of Belligerent Sexual Tension to it all.
  Boey: Good, because I'm coming too. I'm not letting the two of you off on your own.
  Mae: "Letting" us? Heh, you say that like you think you can keep us safe!
  Boey: I do! And I can! I'll be more help than you, at least.
  Mae: Uh, rude? AND wrong. I can conjure lightning, Boey. Big, hurty lightning. What've you got, fire? Maybe I'll call you if I want to roast marshmallows.
  
  Boey: Pfft, your tune changes more easily than a traveling minstrel's! Back on the ship, it was all bellyaching... mostly about your aching belly.
  Mae: Hey, I was seasick! It's a medical thing! And you're hardly one to talk, Boey! You were drooling all over yourself after that buxom maid offered her "thanks".
  Boey: I did no such thing!
  Celica: *giggle*
  Mae: Now look what you've done, you boob! You've got Celica laughing at us again!
  • What really sells "big hurty lightning" in particular is Cherami Leigh's delivery. Pretty much every time Mae opens her mouth, Leigh makes sure it's hilarious.
• Select Mae in battle if she has around half health left, and she gives this gem. The contrast between how her voice actress delivers the two lines is what makes it:
  Mae: Sure, I'm still hyper. [Beat] LET'S GO!
• At the very beginning of Act 2, the old timer sailor asks them to fight pirates. Mae's reaction is, "Do we look like fighters to you? We're delicate little blossoms!" To add to that hilarity, Boey is horrified by being included in that description and cries, "Speak for yourself!"
• Mae and Boey's comments when the masked knight reveals himself are yet again comedy gold.
  Mae: But man, he sure is a lot less moody once the mask comes off, huh? He's like a completely different guy.
  Boey: Almost as if he pretends to be someone else while in disguise... imagine that.
  Mae: Oh yeah... Hee hee! Yeah, that was dumb.
• Boey's scream during a cutscene in Act 4.
  • What really sells it is that Boey almost seemed like he was finally ready to get over his fear of Terrors at Mae's encouragement... only to be met with a graveyard full of Necrodragons.
• Many of the level up quotes when only gaining one stat (or no stats) are very hilarious ^note Keep in mind that the growth rates in Echoes are much closer to the growth rates in the Game Boy Advance/NES era, so expect this to be very common.:
  Mae: Huh? Was that a mosquito?
  Boey: Uhhh...what?
  Atlas: Ah-CHOO! ...The heck did that come from?
  Delthea: I'm waaaaaittttinnnng.....
  Lukas: My mind must be playing tricks on me... ^note Keep in mind that his portrait is still smiling on this.
  Python: Well, that was...underwhelming.
  Tobin: Umm... ^note The kicker is he adds a loud "UH-HUM!" before saying his line
  Gray: Um, what was THAT?
  Faye: Hmm... I thought I felt something.
  Kliff: Hm...? Maybe I'm imagining things.
  Leon: This feels funny—and not the ha-ha kind.
  Saber: Hm? The hell was that?
  Clive: Hm. I thought I felt a tingling, but then...nothing.
  Valbar: Was, uh... was something supposed to happen just now?
• After the battle ends and in the Summary screen, if none of your allies died, some of the quotes from other characters can be pretty funny:
  Delthea: I did it! Oh, and you helped, or whatever...
  Luthier: Of course we won. I'm here.
  Mae: Woo! That was amazing!
  Leon: Honestly? I was pretty much perfect back there.
  Sonya: Over already? How boring.
  Conrad: An inevitable result. [Beat] With me around, that is.
• Try feeding your units food they may not like or like a lot.
  • Some characters' food preferences can be unintentionally hilarious. Who would expect Deen, of all people, to love sweets?
  • Due to some... interesting choice of provisions, your characters can be made to eat raw meat and raw flour. Silque and Atlas will particularly love flour, as it is considered a "rough" food that only the two of them love.
  • If you feed Python a food he dislikes, he'll go "Wow!"[Beat] "This is really terrible!"
  • Feeding Luthier something he dislikes will prompt him to point out that the food is "Clearly not edible!"
  • Delthea takes it a step further by audibly expressing her disdain with a "Blech!" before asking what is wrong with you.
  • Feed Tobin something he doesn't like and he'll go "Uhh, is this even food?" Robbie Daymond's delivery of the line is what really makes it funny.
  • Tatiana, Boey, Valbar, and Deen only hate foods in the "yucky" category. The only provision in the yucky category is Duma Moss. That's right. The only thing they completely detest eating is moss.
• During Celica's part of Act 3, Mae hangs a lampshade on the frequent use of His Name Is... in boss death quotes.
  Mae: Dangit, I hate it when they die right before they say something important!
• A lot of things out of Clair's mouth early on qualify. At first it seems like she might just be putting on airs, but then you realize... no, she's a bit new to warfare and being out in the world and really was that sheltered in her life in the Zofian capital previously. Alm, Gray and Tobin are all a bit unsure what to make of her.
  Clair: What is it like to chase cows every day? I'll wager they bite, the nasty creatures. Hm... and yet, you aren't smothered in manure. This is not what I pictured.
  Alm: Right. Um...
  (later)
  Clair: Might I ask you more about your village later? I'm ever so curious! [...] I've always wanted to know about cows and pigs and such!
  Alm: Yes, they're... they're amazing creatures...
  • Lukas gently tells her that she should remember to treat him as an equal, rather than a commoner. As such, Clair is remiss and sincerely hopes that "the peasant forgive his lady for this gauche breach in etiquette!"
    Alm: (with his sweat drop portrait) It's alright. The peasant - who's name is Alm - will get over it.
  • Another good example comes from her B Support with Alm, where she gives him an overly-flowery greeting in an attempt to impress him, and he comments how ridiculous it actually sounds. Alm ends up lampshading Clair's Innocently Insensitive nature, and she runs off in a huff after denying that she sounds anything like that.
• In Echoes, after Nuibaba is defeated, Alm and Co. rescue Tatiana from her cell. Tatiana then first freaks out upon hearing that they're the Deliverance, calls out to Zeke before recalling that he's not there, tries finding out who of them is the leader of the Deliverance, and is hilariously shocked when she sees it's Alm...
  Tatiana: It's just that you're so young and... young!
• This exchange between Kamui and Leon:
  Kamui: Hey, Leon. Tell me something.
  Leon: Something.
• One of Jesse's base talks ends up with Celica leaving the conversation.
  Jesse: Women are the gods’ most perfect creation. So I want as many as I can g— Er, are you leaving? But I was… No? We’re done? Okay, I think we’re done.
  • When Jesse promotes using a Mila Shrine, he makes an extremely funny, yet weirdly in character comment:
    "My body is your plaything, Mila."
• Heck, the majority of Jesse's introduction is one big funny moment. After getting freed from the Desert Stronghold, he explains how he tried to go save Est (because she's cute), only to get captured because going up against a gang of thieves alone probably wasn't a good idea. Then, when Boey asks what would happen if his plan to get to Grieth's Citadel fails and Jesse just says they'd probably be screwed, Boey comments that it's amazing he's managed to be a mercenary for so long. Jesse interprets that as a compliment.
• One of Genny's base conversations is her describing how she can't wait to be able to recount Celica's journey as an epic. She begins to tell the outline of the tale, with details such as Celica reuniting and bonding with her father. It ends with her exclaiming how she's already planning a sequel.
• The Suitable Suitor DLC Memory Prism, which has Fernand discussing the topic of Clair not being able to find the right suitor in an order of knights. Then she says this to him about his own preferences for a suitor:
  Clair: Besides, Clive already told me what your true weakness is. He claims you prefer ladies like your oranges—full and ripe. Now which of the Knights' eligible ladies is juicy enough for you? Hmm...
  Fernand: I am going to find your brother and bury him in a very deep hole...
  • To say nothing of how earlier, Clair had teased Fernand about how close he is to Clive, and he gets QUITE flustered about it. It almost comes across as Ho Yay thanks to his reaction.
• The Side Quest involving the "Cheese Lover" has quite a bit of this, as seen here. The guy is such a passionate lover of cheese that, if the player gets him a very rare cheese made with pegasus milk, he'll wax Purple Prose about its texture and taste.
• Zeke's win pose has him planting his lance on the ground... and then flipping his blond hair.
• Clive and Mathilda's reunion—especially Alm's reaction to it.
  Clive: Mathilda!
  Mathilda: *gasp* Clive! Oh, how I have missed you, my sweet Clive!
  Clive: Forgive me, Mathilda. I should never have left you to suffer for so long. Speak now your loathing for me, and I will gladly bear it all.
  Mathilda: Oh, stop your nonsense. You did what any commander ought. Your judgment was sound. And I bear the blame for my capture, not you. I was careless. So let us speak no more of blame.
  Clive: As you wish.
  Mathilda: Good. Now, I wonder what comes next...
  Clive: What indeed...
  Alm: ......^note Alm is visibly blushing.
  Gray: What a woman! Yowza! ...Um, Alm? You’re blushing.
  Alm: Wh-what? No I’m not!
• Kamui's reaction should Celica and co. wander into a necrodragon's lair in Act 2.
  Kamui: Whoa, whoa, whoa—hey, Priestess! Did you forget our little chat about staying clear of the Seabound Shrine? Because this is not staying clear! This is the exact OPPOSITE of staying clear!
  Celica: I'm sorry, did we discuss that? I must have been preoccupied... What if there's something of use here? Surely you would want to— Ooooh, I remember now. You're scared of necrodragons, aren't you, Kamui? How careless of me. It completely slipped my mind!
  Kamui: Slipped your mind... That's it. I'm waiting on the boat.
  Celica: Er, actually...
  [roar]
  Kamui: GyaaaeeeeeeeEEEEEEEK! It's HERE!
  • If Kamui isn't there for whatever reason, Boey and Saber are the ones not amused. And Boey again Screams Like a Little Girl.
• Tobin's retreat quote on Casual Mode or if he gets taken down before his Plot Armor expires on Classic Mode.
  Tobin: I can take it... Nope! No, no I can't. You better go on without me...
• Early in Act 5, Celica's companions turn Snark-to-Snark Combat and Casual Danger Dialog into a beautiful combination.
  Saber: Blast it all! This place is crawling with Terrors. So much for "begone to wherever you will," you damn useless priest!
  Boey: And what is that supposed to mean? You’re not actually thinking of leaving Celica in there and running away?!
  Saber: Did you hear me say anything about running away? Gimme some credit here, you little snot!
  Conrad: Stop flapping your jaws and focus on the fight! I'd prefer not to die here, if it’s all the same to you two fools!
• Celica shows that she's Not So Above It All when examining pirate treasures:
  Celica: My my. Look at all this pirate booty...Heh.
• You'd think that Boey and Mae's last support would end in a heartwarming love confession. It kind of does, except this is Boey and Mae:
  Boey: Then that's where I'm going as well.
  Mae: Huh? Wait, what's that mean?
  Boey: Are you really such a dope that you can't figure it out?
  Mae: WAAAAAAT?!
  • If they're both alive after defeating the final boss, their endings can come off as this to some players. The two get married and have children together soon afterwards, but the game doesn't specify how many. Boey's ending describes it as "in plentiful number" while in Mae's it's simply "many." Hmm...
• In Act 1, as Alm inspires the other villagers to leave the village and join the war, Kliff has this gem:
  Kliff: Splendid idea. Maybe we can all get impaled on the same lance!
  • Alm replies that them all going together sounds fun. He then quickly feels the need to clarify that he means joining the Deliverance, not getting impaled on a lance.
  • It takes on a darker twist if one remembers that in the manga for the original Gaiden, Kliff actually was killed by being impaled on a lance.
• The infamous Shut Up, Tobin.
• Luthier and Delthea's entire support conversation, but special mention goes to their A-Support. Luthier informs his sister that he's made his first friend: Alm. He recounts that he asked Alm if they were friends, and Alm nodded. Luthier's delivery really sells it.
  • Naturally, Delthea lampshades it, replying that most people wouldn't be mean enough to directly say no to that kind of question.
• Delthea's supports with Clair are also great. She gets a Precocious Crush on Clive and starts rambling about how he's so much cooler than her own brother. When their A Support rolls around, Clair starts to insult Luthier as well... only for Delthea to step in and defend him. Clair suspected she'd do that, and Delthea's delivery of the following line really sells it:
  Delthea:^note (with her ticked off portrait) HEY, WAIT! Did you just trick me into saying nice stuff about my brother?!
• Forsyth's DLC supports with Clive center around Clive trying to get Forsyth to loosen up a bit. Clive eventually asks him to imagine that he's talking to Python instead. Forsyth gets a worried look on his face and asks if he really means for him to talk to Clive exactly like he does to Python. ...Clive pauses, and then admits that's maybe not the best idea after all.
• Any time Alm and Celica Squee over the various cats you can find around towns.
• If a unit misses or only does 1HP damage, it can be commented on by another unit.
• Similarly, while most of the things the characters can say to each other after they do well in combat are on the heartwarming side... there are still a couple of funny examples.
  Forsyth: (one of two things he can say to Python) Wow, he's actually trying!
  Kliff: Of course, you MEANT to do that!
  Kamui: Nice. Keep doing my work for me!
  Boey: (to Mae) Not bad, for you!
• Jedah giving a 2-minute speech while face-down in the mud should you defeat him in the Swamps of Duma battle is rather hilarious.

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