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Funny / Elf

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  • All together now: "SAAAAAAANTAAAAAAA!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!"
  • Santa taking a slow, sinister bite out of his cookie after hearing a suspicious noise (baby Buddy getting out of his crib) in his introduction.
    • And then Buddy gets his name because his diaper read "Little Buddy Diapers".
  • On his journey from the North Pole to New York City, Buddy's encounter with an unfriendly Rascally Raccoon. It hisses at him, then he asks, "Does someone need a hug?" and tries to hug it, but it attacks him and he says, "That's not cool! I just wanted a hug!".
  • All of Buddy's Fish out of Water moments in New York City, where he ends up treating a revolving door and zebra-stripe crosswalk as games. Also this:
    Buddy: Have you seen these toilets? They're ginormous!
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  • Buddy at one point gets hit by a taxi-cab going at full speed. The force of the cab causes him to literally flip over. He responds by apologizing for getting in the driver's way and runs off as if he didn't get run over!
  • Buddy trying to go up the escalator. It's as funny as it sounds!
  • Buddy mistaking his dad's potential client, a hot-tempered little person, for an elf is Cringe Comedy gold.
    "He's an angry elf."
    • At the end, he still thinks the guy is an elf, but concludes he must be a South Pole one.
  • Will Ferrell at his Will Ferrel-iest while confronting the Mall Santa:
    "You sit on a throne of lies."
    "You smell like beef and cheese, you don't smell like Santa."
  • [answering a phone] "Buddy the Elf, what's your favorite color?"
    • And that the caller immediately hangs up without saying anything.
  • Buddy hitting all the buttons in the Empire State elevator. The poor sap going to the top keeps a straight face all the way.
    • "Oh, wait! I forgot to give you a hug!"
    • When all the buttons are pressed, he claims it looks like a Christmas tree.
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  • [after being hit with a snowball] "Owwww! Son of a nutcracker!"
  • Trying to buy women's sexy lingerie for his dad. No, really (he bought it because the lingerie said it was "for someone special").
    Val: (bemused) What's that?
  • "I traveled through the seven levels of the Candy Cane Forest, past the Sea of Swirly Twirly Gumdrops, and then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel."
  • Buddy's first impression of the mail room. "This place kinda reminds me of Santa's workshop. Except it smells like mushrooms and everyone looks like they want to hurt me."
    • Buddy recounting his story of how he came to New York (see above), then asking his new co-worker how he got there. The guy simply replies that he's on work release.
    • The guy sharing his "syrup" (liquor) with Buddy, followed by the two of them hanging out drunk in a couple of mail bins, though it ends on a sweet note with the two of them tickle-fighting gleefully.
    Guy: I'm twenty-six and I've got nothing to show for it.
    Buddy: (dazed) Oh, you're young, you're young. My papa, he didn't make head tinkerer 'till he was 490.
    (The guy howls with laughter before he and Buddy start tickle-fighting)
    • Buddy dancing on the table, distracting the other workers from work.
  • Buddy singing in Gimbels:
    Buddy: I'm SINGING! I'm in a store and I'm SINGING! I'm in a store AND I'M SINGING!
    Gimbels Manager: Hey! There's no singing in the North Pole.
    Buddy: Yes, there is.
    Gimbels Manager: No, there's not.
    Buddy: We sing all the time. Especially when we make toys.
    • His reason for singing the "I'm in a store and I'm singing" song was because Jovie told him that she couldn't sing. Buddy replied that it's just like talking except "louder, longer, and you move your voice up and down." She replied that she could sing, but chose not to in front of other people, so he sang the song to prove that there's no difference between singing alone and singing in front of other people.
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  • The Bigfoot-esque video of Buddy in the park.
  • When Michael looks up the name of the female reporter in Santa's List and reads that she wants an engagement ring and her boyfriend to commit.
  • "YOU DID IT! CONGRATULATIONS! [beat] World's best cup of coffee!" (Context: Buddy sees that sign on a cafe and thinks it's a prize the cafe won.)
    • Later, on his date with Jovie....
      Jovie: (sipping it while blindfolded) It tastes like a crappy cup of coffee.
      (Buddy chuckles in a "She has no idea" kind of way as she takes off the blindfold)
      Jovie: It is a crappy cup of coffee.
      Buddy: No it's not. It's the world's best cup of coffee!
  • The end where Buddy's stepdad realizes he has not one but two normal sized people to look after.
  • Buddy filling in the male part of "Baby It's Cold Outside" while Jovie is in the shower. While she freaks out, he puts his hands over his eyes and attempts to run out, and runs right into a locker face-first.
  • During the single saddest moment in the film, we get this little bit of comic relief during Buddy's goodbye message (written on an Etch-E-Sketch, of course).
    "I'm sorry that I ruined your life and crammed eleven cookies into the VCR."
  • When Walter asks Buddy how he got the photo of him and Susan Wells.
    Walter: Who gave you this photo?
    Buddy: (without a hint of irony in his voice) Papa Elf.
    (Walter stares at Buddy in complete silence for two seconds as he realizes this is going to be a lot harder than he thought)
    • And then when they leave the police precinct, Buddy tries to hold his hand, only for Walter to smack it away without a second thought.
    • Walter thinks Buddy is a Christmas gram, so he asks Buddy to sing him a song. Buddy sings a song he made up on the fly that has lyrics such as "I was adopted and you didn't know I was born" and ends with an off-key "And, guess what? I love you! I love you! I love you-ou!".
      Walter: "Whoa, that was weird! Usually, you guys just put my name into Jingle Bells or something."
      Buddy: "It's me, your son!"
      Walter: "Who sent this Christmas gram?"
      Buddy: "What's a Christmas gram?! I want one!"
  • The Running Gag of Buddy putting candy in all his food and drink (he even claims that the four main food groups are all candy.)
    Buddy: "Please pass the maple syrup."
    Walter's wife: "I didn't put... it's spaghetti."
    Buddy: "I always carry some with me. (puts syrup on his spaghetti)"
    Walter's wife: "You... like sugar, huh?"
    Buddy: "Is there sugar in syrup?"
    Walter's wife: "Y-yes..."
    Buddy: "Then, yes!"
  • Buddy complimenting a woman's purple outfit by calling it very "purpley".
  • Buddy thinking the radiator is an "evil box" because it makes a weird noise.
  • At the table, Buddy burps loudly then asks, "Did you hear that?", which prompts Michael to say, "You're so weird."
  • When Buddy gets his DNA test, he is eating cotton balls, then when his finger is pricked, he claims it has a heartbeat. It's around that time he meets the little girl.
    Buddy: "I'm an elf. Well, technically I'm a human, but I was raised by elves."
    Carolyn: "Oh. I'm a human. Raised by humans."
  • When the writers are trying to think of book ideas, they're all about anthropomorphic fruit and vegetables: a tomato on a farm (rejected for being 'too vulnerable' and farm stories being too generic; that writer was later called a hypocrite because he himself thought of a story about a peach on a farm), and a group of asparagus children who are self-conscious about the way their pee smells.
  • Buddy doing a Big "NO!" when he finds out that Walter is on the 'naughty' list.
  • Buddy having fun saying the phrase "San Francisco" over and over.
  • Santa's advice to Buddy: "If you see gum on the street, leave it there. It's not free candy. There are a many Ray's Pizzas who all claim to be the original but the real one's on eleventh. And if you see a sign that says, 'Peep Show', that doesn't mean they're letting you look at presents before Christmas."
  • Buddy's list of activities to do with his father include ice skating, eating sugar plums and cookie dough, and snuggling. Walter is so confident that Buddy isn't his son that he promises to do them all, adding that "we'll even paint eggs."
    Buddy: "Well, paint eggs? That's Easter!"
  • Walter tells Buddy to lose his tights "as soon as possible", so he drops them then and there.

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