Funny / Edge (Wrestler)

aka: Edge

• His five-second poses with Christian (and later, Kurt Angle) in 2000.
  Edge: For the benefit of those with flash photography...
• Mentioning Kurt Angle, Edge's 2002 feud with him was filled with Crowning Moments Of Funny.
  • Getting the fans to chant "You Suck!" and "What?" in time with Kurt Angle's entrance theme may be his greatest comedic achievement - It stuck with Angle for the rest of his WWE career.
  Kurt Angle: Play my music!! (Beat) Nono wait! Don't play my music! DON'T PLAY MY MUSIC!
  • One famous backstage segment is Edge showing Kurt Angle some photos, but every single one of them had scribbled signs on the back trolling the heck out of him. Twenty years later, Edge does it again and Kurt fell for it once more. Even better is that Kurt became somewhat Genre Savvy and flipped the first photo to double check that he wasn't tricked but still fell for it since Edge only left the first photo blank.
• Edge came out, interrupted current champion Sheamus's "Waa waa, everyone's out to get me" rant, then compared the red-headed champion to Beaker, followed by Edge making Beaker's meeping noises and casually walking to the ring.
  • This turned into one HELL of a Brick Joke at the 10/31/11 RAW, which featured The Muppets as guest 'stars.' Sheamus, now a face, runs off Christian, who was bullying - you guessed it. Beaker. Then Sheamus and Beaker have a conversation, where Sheamus comments that he's "not gonna be able to make it to the family reunion this year."
  • And the match he was wrestling was an Elimination 5-on-5 Tag Team match against The Nexus. After Chris Jericho immediately walked out of the match, Edge gets in the ring, acts as if he's getting ready to fight... And shoves the referee to the ground to get intentionally disqualified. The smug look on Edge's face as he walks to the back whilst Randy Orton, John Cena, & Sheamus just stand there stunned as they watch him walk away is PRICELESS.
• For more Edge/Sheamus fun, on the Raw following the 2010 Royal Rumble, Edge's promo is interrupted by then WWE Champion Sheamus, who tells him a lot has changed since he was gone. Edge replies, "You're right, a lot has changed! Apparently Raw's been taken over by an evil Ronald McDonald!" You can see Sheamus trying to hold in his laughter.
• Edge's crusade to destroy everything stupid in the WWE (which led to some hilarious tweets from the likes of Joey Styles, saying "Michael Cole is only ten feet away!"). Highlights include:
  • Smashing the computer used to communicate with the "anonymous general manager" of RAW, while said "anonymous general manager" begs for mercy in a GLaDOS-esque electronic voice
    Edge: WHY DO YOU KEEP INTERFERING IN MY BUSINESS?! WHY—(Beat)...why am I arguing with a computer?
  • Trashing Jack Swagger's homecoming celebration, including his mascot, the "Swagger Soaring Eagle," and mocking his lisp in the process:
    Edge: The fact that you named it the Thwagger Thoaring Eagle makes it especially thtupid!
    SPEAR.
    Michael Cole: Dead bird! Dead bird! Dead bird!!
  Swagger: (as said Eagle is being loaded up on a stretcher) Do you know how hard it is for an eagle to get medical insurance?!
• At the 2010 Slammys, Christian came out to present the ""Oh Snap, Meltdown Of The Year" award with Edge. Well, Edge won the award for the time he destroyed the GM Laptop, and started ranting about the Anonymous RAW GM. At which point, the "New Email" alert went off on Christian's phone, and he started to read the email... Before he revealed he was just kidding, since Edge was having another meltdown. After regaining his composure, Edge motions to Christian to make his phone play the jingle again, and proceeds to parody Michael Cole, before walking backstage with his trademark smirk on his face.
  Edge: And I quote... [Beat] Michael Cole...is STILL a massive tool.
• Edge dances with Jillian Hall.
• Vickie trying to spear him, failing epically and the look on his face was priceless.
• Everything he says to Michael Cole, while on commentary during Christian vs Alberto Del Rio on Smackdown 4/8/11.
  • "You're built like a bag of golf balls, Michael Cole, you should shut up."
• According to Edge, "NOBODY CARES ABOUT MICHAEL COLE!"
• His parody of Ric Flair's 2005 road rage incident, culminating in pulling Robbie E out of a car, chopping him several times, and putting him in a figure four leglock in the middle of a highway, dressed in nothing but a blonde wig and pink robe.
• SPEAR SPEAR SPEAR.
  Edge: (to Chris Jericho) You beat The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin in one night SPEAR. You beat Shawn Michaels in his own match SPEAR. You beat three WWE Hall of Famers in one night at Wrestlemania last year SPEARSPEAR. You beat The Undertaker twice SPEARSPEARSPEAR.
• Edge abducting Paul Bearer in order to torment Kane. In the meantime, he proceeds to torture Paul in a variety of ways, including racing around with him, dumping food on him, and playing dodgeball with him.
  Paul Bearer: BASTARDS! BASTARDS!! BASTARDS!!!
• Anytime Edge lets everyone know he's proved his doubters wrong. Sorry, that should read WRONG.
  Edge: Guess what? You were all WRONG. WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG. WROOOOOONG!! You were wrong. (circles the ring, pointing at fans) You were wrong. You were wrong, you were wrong, you were definitely wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong..... hey, kid. Hey, kid, you know what? You know what, fella? When you grow up? You're gonna be WRONG!!! Each and every one of you were 100% WROOOOOONG!!!!!
  • "You're all like big fat failure turtles."
• One promo from the Team RECK ^note  Rhyno, Edge, Christian and Kurt Angle era had Kurt Angle ranting to Edge about all the things he hated about Chris Jericho. Edge's mannerisms when Kurt gets to "long haired, blond, Canadian" are priceless.
  • Even better is that Angle would later do the exact same thing with Edge & Jericho's roles flipped.
• Vickie Guerrero gets fired NANANANANANA HEY HEY HEY GOOD BYYYYYYYYE!
• Edge's return in 2012. Particularly his comments on Kane and the awkwardness on that hug.
  Edge: You are not Barney, the big red dinosaur! You are the big red machine! You and I have done things—okay, I stole your wife and then you broke up my wedding your exwife by tombstoning a priest!
• Edge trolling Beth Phoenix as she promotes her first post-WWE signing from off-screen as he recovers from his neck surgery by shoving a note in front of her demanding cookies, interrupting her mid-sentance by calling her phone (Which features his WWE theme as the ringtone when he calls), and finally, busting out a cowbell. She then politely excuses herself, then all we hear are some pained groans.
• "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE, JEFF HARDY?! DIDN'T YOU DIE LIKE THREE YEARS AGO?!"
• His asides on the 15th anniversary special of Smackdown.
• When he and Christian came back to guest host the last Raw of 2014, they had their talk shows near the end, with the guest being Seth Rollins. Rollins brought out Big Show, who had turned heel. After Rollins had ranted, saying that he was above Edge and Christian, Edge delivers the funniest line of the night:
  Edge: (to Seth Rollins) You couldn't be above me if you had a live sex celebration with the Big Goiter over here!
• During the first Smackdown of 2015, he and Christian were hosting the show that night. The last thing they did before they left? Vandalize the "Muscle and Fitness" cover featuring Triple H and Stephanie.
• At Fastlane 2016, during the Cutting Edge Peep Show, he and Christian are confronted by the League of Nations and declare that the ring is theirs, with Sheamus telling them to leave the ring. But E&C are not done yet.
  Edge: You know, guys. We, uh, we were gonna give these people a 5-second pose tonight...but, you know, maybe you four should take that honor.
  Christian: Right. So, for the benefit of those with flash photography...Cleveland, we give you...
  Edge: ...the international house of dumbasses.
  (The New Day jumps around while laughing)
  Kofi: Hey, hey. Bomber Wade. Bomber Wade. When we said "turn the other cheek", THIS is what we meant.
  (Xavier Woods sits playing his trombone)
  Christian: And right after Fastlane...right after Fastlane...Watch (Beat) our show! Watch our show! Watch our show! Watch our show!
  • For bonus points, Christian delivered his last line to the rhythm of The New Day's own "New Day rocks!"
• Civil Rights Advocate Edge.