Funny / The Longest Journey Saga

aka: Dreamfall Chapters

The Longest Journey

• At the police station:
  Dumpy file clerk lady: "You again? Why do you keep bugging me?"
  April: "Because I'm an evil bitch who enjoys making life miserable for people with menial jobs."
• Do the monkeeeeeeeeeey!
• "Come here and let me pet you - AGGGH!"
• April makes a Funny Background Event in a news report.
  • Afterwards, the news reporter has a meltdown.
• The Pizza machine gets closed by the department of biological warfare. If you check it, you get told that if anyone's enjoyed a pizza from one of those machines, to immediately go to the hospital.
• It's easy to miss, but there's a man standing next to Warren's apartment on Hope street with his back turned, looking down at something, and making strange motions with his left arm. April is properly grossed out. Even worse is that if that's what he's really doing, he's doing it in broad daylight.
• The Outtakes.
• SOLAR ECLIPSE!
• April and her diary is full of irony. For example:
  "Sundays are made for sleeping in. Sundays are made for walking around in baggy clothes, watching movies, nursing headaches and hanging out with your friends at the cafe. Sundays are NOT made for going to the worst neighbourhood in town to find a kid who might be able to give you the information necessary to infiltrate a powerful cult that plans to take over the known universe. That's what Mondays are for."
• April trying to use a computer like apparatus:
  April: F.U.B.?
  Terminal: Fair Use Bureau. They are authorized to carry deadly weapons."
• And then there is Crow. He is the talking bird side-kick that makes this game good.
  April: Crow, I need you to fly over there and get some of those berries for me. And Crow?
  Crow: Yes, ma'am?
  April: Don't eat the berries.
  Crow: No, ma'am."
• April, at one point, tries to flirt with a cop to get information on a shuttle crash. The cop bluntly retorts, "Sorry, Ma'am, but I'm gay."
• April forges a work form to get two lazy maintenance guys to fix the police station entrance.
  "Fix the damn door!"
• When April rescues Crow from the cups man, she struggles to fit him into her "inventory".
• April asking for directions from the Maps Merchant, and every Non Sequitur therein.
• April is all about the tall tales of sea dogs and pirates, and every cliche imagination about sailing. Captain Nebevay is deeply, DEEPLY unamused by her talk.
• Even after giving Jerry the clerk ("It's GEROLD!") a great deal of trouble, acting as The Thing That Would Not Leave, all it takes to fool him into allowing April full access to the office of his boss is her waving around a pizza box - even if she doesn't even leave the building between pestering him and using the box.

Dreamfall: The Longest Journey

• When Zoe and Crow are riding on an airship:
  Zoë: It was nice chatting with you, Crow. It's been very informative.
  Crow: Glad to help, doll.
  Zoë: "Doll"?
  Crow: D'oh, I mean independent and self-reliant female person who's not an object to be ogled or used solely for my own personal amusement and pleasure.
• The description of the robots in the WATIcorp Museum are pretty funny:
  [BunnyBot] The first BunnyBot was ten feet tall and weighted more than three hundred kilograms. After several unfortunate casualities—of which WATIcorp has been completely absolved—a smaller and lighter version was put into production. The BunnyBot has remained one of WATIcorp's most popular toybots, and it's still being sold to happy children and concerned adults across the world today.
  [Li'l Big Cat] Li'l Big Cat was WATIcorp's first furry robot. Accompanied by a very popular animated show, The Amazing Adventures of Li'l Big Cat & Bob, it proved to be a huge success. The show ran for eight years and ended with a very special episode where Bob - the reformed child murder - killed, boiled and ate Li'l Big Cat. Fans have been demanding the return of Li'l Big Cat and WATIcorp is currently considering bringing this popular and twisted toybot back to the markets - and to your screens.
• The awkward elevator scene.
• Wonkers, a children's toy, has to say "shit-faced" at one point, while relaying Reza's message to Zoe.
• There are two taverns in Marcuria with interesting names: "The Salty Seaman", and "The Cock and the Puss." Zoe shrugs the latter off with an unimpressed "Okay."
• In the market, you can hear the merchants shouting to sell their wares. The spice merchant, who doesn't have anything in his stall at the moment, has a few different phrases he might yell. One of them is "I have nothing to sell, but I am shouting nonetheless!"
• Once again, April infiltrates one of the most secure locations she comes across by posing as a food delivery person.

Dreamfall Chapters

• Zoë is tasked with taking a robot named Shitbot out and testing its functions. It's as terrible as it's name suggests, and as such is incredibly hilarious.
  • The return of Shitbot - while not as funny as the first time, its "Welding welding welding welding welding welding!" is just as funny as it was before... and its description of how Mira's perimeter defenses will kill Zoë in incredibly graphic ways.
• On the other hand, seeing her reaction to Kidbot is as amusing as it is cute.
  Zoë: If we ever adopt, I want it to be a robot!
  • Kidbot decides they should play mommy and baby. Cue Kidbot calling "Baby!" across the river and Zoë saying plenty of "Ok mom"'s.
  • During the ferry riddle, the ferry man will get understandibly panicked by the bell. Kidbot simply summarizes the situation with "He's upset." and if one repeats the procedure, it will instead gleefully claim it's having fun.
• Mira's Establishing Character Moment:
  "Goddamn this shitty shitting shit shit. SHIT!"
• Both Kian and Zoe's Lame Pun Reactions to their own bad puns... particularly because they both say, "God/Goddess, I'm losing my mind," in exactly the same tone.
• Zoe's dialogue about Mr. Planty in her apartment.
• Kian's confusion about the taverns name and his realization once he voices it.
  Kian: The Rooster and Kitten? Why not name it The Cock and- Oh.
  • When Zoe and Crow find a advertisment poster for it, it's even more on the nose.
    Crow: Is that a pussy riding a co-
  • When Zoe confronts the barkeep, she is baffled that he changed the name since he thought the name was a too sophisticated pun on "cocky cockerel".
• If one rejected Anna and then gets the Evensong, she will appear and believe to now know why he rejected her.

  Anna: I expected a lot, but...Goats?

• Kian really loves his yams.

  Kian: Plain, boring old apples. They're certainly no yams.

  Kian: Are those...yams? No, they're only apples. (sigh)

  Kian: In a world with yams, who needs apples?

  • There's also a ridiculously long scene of Kian eating yam snacks in Ulvics tavern...
• Mira's response to Zoë vanishing? "This shitty shitting shit just got weird."
• In the second interlude, have Saga interact with some of the items around her house, such as her father's hat, the guitar, and an umbrella.
• During the section in Mr. London's warehouse, Zoe uses different programming for bots to get past the guards. She tricks a guard into thinking he's been smoking far too many drugs. The bots themselves are Chewing the Scenery, and utterly hilarious for it.
• A severe case of Black Comedy, but Mr. London is torturing a guy by playing golf, hitting the victim with an electric ball. The real kicker is the victim is in front of a backdrop of a sand trap.
• Kian is utterly baffled when trying to use yams to catch a rat. It makes no sense to him that rats wouldn't like them.
• When Zoe tries to decide what to order from Ulvic, she has some explanations for each choice. Except beer. Where her justification is simply "Beer".
• When Kian has to open a magical passage by singing, Crow is not impressed with his performance and mocks him more and more with each failure to hit the right notes.
• Crow tries to get stoic, disciplined Kian to laugh. After one try, Kian has to promise the appalled Crow to never laugh again.
• Saga's preferred way to pass the time while holding open a shift for people to pass through: snark at everyone to hurry up already.
• While in Zoe's apartment, turn on the television. An opening for a very bizarre-looking series comes on. Zoe offers no comment.
• If the player tries to have Zoe leave her apartment before getting her fully dressed, Zoe comments:
  "Much as I'd like to go out dressed in nothing but my knickers, I think I'll get dressed."
• A cop warns Nela that her permit is about to expire.
  Cop: "You have 24 hours to comply."
  Nela: "YOU have 24 hours to comply!"
  Cop: "That doesn't make any sense."
• After the EYE curfew is in place, a bot is assigned as Zoe's escort to her registered destination.
  EYEbot: Every step you take, I'll be watching you, as mandated by martial law.
  Zoe: How about every breath I... Oh, I give up.

---