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Funny / Dragonheart

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    Dragonheart (1996) 
  • Near the beginning of the film, we have this little gem of an exchange:
    Einon: The peasants are revolting!
    Brok: They've always been revolting, prince. Now they're rebellin'.
  • The scene where Brother Gilbert sits on Draco, who has disguised himself as a white boulder. Gilbert is attempting to write a song about Bowen and taps his quill on Draco's head to sharpen the point. The "boulder" opens one eye in surprise and annoyance, creating a bit of visual hilarity.
  • And when the villagers decide to sacrifice Kara (who is a rebellious troublemaker) to Draco in order to get him to leave. The following exchange happens between Bowen and Draco.
    Draco: Who's the girl?
    Bowen: A nuisance, get rid of her!
    Draco: Why?
    Bowen: They're trying to placate you with a sacrifice!
    Draco: Oh, and who ever gave them that bright idea?
    Bowen: Just get rid of her!
    Draco: How?
    Bowen: her!
    Draco: Oh please, yuck!
    Bowen: Are we squeamish? You ate Sir Eglemoor, hypocrite!
    Draco: I merely chewed in self-defense! But I never swallowed.
    • Especially as that's likely a dragon's version of "I didn't inhale".
    • The novelization has a tad bit more banter:
    Bowen: I suppose scorching her's out of the question.
    Draco: Absolutely!
    Bowen: It would impress the yokels.
    Draco: Will you listen to yourself?
    • Later on, when Bowen comes to check up on them, Draco admits to being... distracted.
    • Distracted is an understatement; Draco is charming the hell out of Kara. Which takes on a bit of meta-hilarity when you remember Sean Connery's turn as James Bond, ladies' man extraordinaire.
    • And then it gets even better when Kara thinks she's defending Draco from Bowen, he starts admitting the ruse, while in the background, Draco is silently waving his hand to indicate "No, stop!", and ends by quickly drawing a line across his throat in the universal sign of "Shut UP!". Also funny from a meta-perspective - think of how slow and expensive CGI was at the time, and they're using it to make a quick joke like that.
      • Certainly is more amusing as in the novelization, Draco's trying hard not to laugh while Kara's jumping Bowen.
  • Draco diving out of the lake after being "killed" by Bowen and seeing a herd of sheep: "Well... hello." Dinner ensues.
  • The third attempt at fake dragon slaying, with Kara trying to reason to the villagers they're frauds and Brother Gilbert suddenly coming to Bowen's rescue of his daring fighting prowess (who has no idea of their bargain after their standstill).
    Kara: Don't you see? He's in league with the dragon!
    (everyone stares at her, before bursting into full-blown laughter)
    • Then there was the actual crossbow attempt, which goes well... until Draco hits shallow water headfirst.
      Bowen: *whispers* Come on sink! SINK!
      Draco: *whispers* I can't, it doesn't get any deeper.
      • And the amused look on Kara's face upon seeing this.
      • Even better in the novelization: Kara climbs on top of Draco to jump on his stomach, causing him to start Corpsing.
      • And the piece of resistance: all the villagers chasing the dragon for 'meat', prompting him to fly away for his life (and in turn blowing the ruse)
      • And while the Power Trio are attempting to escape, Bowen swinging Brother Gilbert up onto his horse causes BG to accidentally cop a feel on Kara.
      • There's a very quick bit when he's running across the shallow water, and suddenly stumbles and falls into a dip in the lake bed. The snarl he lets out seems to be about half, "Dammit, I fell!" and half "Oh, sure, here it's deep!"
      • It gets even better: After Draco flies off, the villagers turn and start advancing on Bowen and company, while still chanting the word "meat."
      • You can't forget Brother Gilbert's congratulations!
        Brother Gilbert: Well done Bowen! You've done it again! What a brute! Why, he's even bigger than the last one!
        Bowen: Actually, he's about the same size...
  • Draco and Bowen's Mexican Standoff.
  • Brother Gilbert suddenly coming up with a good verse. "Wait, that was good...what did I just say?"
  • At one point, Bowen is having a hard time lighting a cooking fire, and Draco offers to help. Never mind that the result is like taking a flamethrower to a tissue - "I hope you like it well done..." - but the way Draco lights it is good for a laugh; with almost a bored expression on his face, Draco pinches one nostril shut and exhales out the other as if he's blowing his nose.
  • When Draco rescues Bowen, Kara, and Brother Gilbert from the cannibalistic villagers, we are then treated to several fantastic shots of Draco flying through the evening sky. And what do we hear?
  • During the scene where Bowen is training the villagers to fight against Einan's army, he teaches Brother Gilbert how to shoot a bow and arrow. Brother Gilbert manages to shoot the dummy right in the head on the first try. Hewe simply chalks it up as Beginner's Luck, and tells him to try again. He does, and where does the arrow hit the dummy this time? Right in the crotch.
    Bowen: Brother Gilbert... You're a natural!

    Dragonheart: A New Beginning (2000) 
  • The sequence of Drake's first flight after he saves Geoff from being pushed off a cliff.
  • There's a scene where Lian is fighting a bunch of soldiers. She knocks one guy's sword out of his hands, and it flies straight as an arrow and sinks into a post next to Geoff. A few moments later, a second sword flies at the pole and sticks into it as well, next to the first. And if that isn't enough, one of the soldiers has a decorative point on the top of his helmet and ends up getting thrown headfirst at the pole and getting stuck in it as well.
  • Drake being taught how to use the rare "ice lung" dragon ability, during which he intentionally drools on Geoff before firing a spit projectile hits Mansel right in the face with Drake fearing that he killed him.
  • Imprisoned in a cell, an undisguised Lian plays dumb with the guards and quickly turns the tables on them.

    Dragonheart 3: The Sorcerer's Curse (2015) 
  • In the forest, Gareth introduces himself to Drago and describes the Picts, only for an unamused Drago to say his first words.
    Gareth: Me, Gareth. Me, strong. Good. Good human. Uh...The others, savages. Bad. Really awful, evil, smelly...
    Drago: I shared my heart with the village idiot.
    • When Lorne speaks to Drago, in the same manner, a minute later:
    Lorne: Me, human. You, dragon.
    Drago: Been through that, thank you.
  • The sequence of Drago trying to teach Gareth "shadowjumping" after Rhonu offers to "carry him over the threshold" of a cave.
  • Drago teases Gareth for his developing feelings for Rhonu and Gareth calls Drago a "talking saddlebag". Then Drago and Gareth begin hurting themselves in order to hurt the other. Ending on an especially funny note when Gareth punches himself in the groin as Rhonu watches unbeknownst to him, only for Drago to be unaffected by it, except for maybe feeling a small tickle.

    Dragonheart: Battle for the Heartfire (2017) 
  • Edric tries to figure out how Mehgan stole Drago's heartfire:
    Edric: So, just to be clear, she just walked right up to you and took your fire? ...I mean, do you even count as a dragon anymore? You're more like a worm. Like a leggy worm.
  • Mehgan is given a tour of the castle with some nice dramatic shots, and then she is shown the royal bedchamber... and discovers it completely trashed, with a clucking chicken sitting on the table. Her only comment is "Boys."
  • When out at sea with his Viking captors, Edric forces one halfway through the bottom of their boat and escapes with Drago. The Vikings then try to get their companion unstuck, only to decide against it since doing so will sink their boat.

     Dragonheart: Vengeance (2020) 
  • Siveth, Darius, and Lukas all have a number of Deadpan Snarker moments, especially as they play off of each other, and whenever Siveth talks to herself.
    Siveth: Humans. High and mighty. Screaming for salvation. Hmm? Even you don't follow your own advice.
  • Siveth tries to give Lukas dating advice. It goes poorly somewhere around the 'compliment her scent' part.


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