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  • Everything on the Things Never Seen website, which goes over some of the ways that you can break the game for ensuing hilarity.
  • It's possible (very easy, in fact) for Paul to get hit by a stray NSF bullet in the starting docks. This will result in him chasing down every NSF terrorist on the ground level with the stun prod, zapping them unconscious one by one even under a hail of gunfire. He'll also try to stun the security bot if he gets too close.
  • Anytime you use the tranquilizer dart - the poisoned target will run around in a panic, grunting as their energy is sapped, before collapsing face first into the ground.
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    • Made better by the fact that the target will grunt and scream in pain (using the same voice clips as the target does when shot) before collapsing on the ground with a relatively quiet moan.
  • The artificial stupidity of most of the guards means that the biggest reaction a dead body will elicit is mild irritation. In fact, it's possible for the player to carry an unconscious body right in front of a pair of guards and drop it in the (very visible) canal with no repercussions at all.
  • Gunther complaining to Anna Navarre about his own private conspiracy theory.
    Anna: Are you sure you pressed the right button?
    Gunther: I do not make mistakes of that kind!
    Anna: Your hand might have slipped.
    Gunther: No, I wanted orange. It gave me lemon-lime.
    Anna: The machine would not make a mistake.
    Gunther: It's the maintenance man. He knows I like orange!
    Anna: So you think the staff has some kind of plot?
    Gunther: Yes! They do it on purpose!
  • Who could forget this exchange:
    Jock: Oh my god, JC, a bomb!
    JC: A BOMB!
    • And then there's JC's way of "expressing" sympathy:
      JC: He was a good man. *lip smack* What a rotten way to die.
  • Disposing of Gunther:
    Gunther Hermann: Eet ees a simple message I am demonstreting. Ve know vere you are going and vat you intend.
    JC Denton: And I know something about you.
    Gunther Hermann: You kno you vill be defeeted.
    JC Denton: I know your UNATCO killphrase: "Laputan Machine."
    Gunther Hermann: I am not a mashee
    JC Denton: Sticks and stones.
    Gunther Hermann: (LUDICROUS GIBS)
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  • Snarking Walton after the above exchange:
    JC Denton: You're worried, Simons. We almost have a cure.
    Walton Simons: You have nothing. Even if Everett succeeds, you can't synthesize enough vaccine to stop an epidemic. You'd need a Universal Constructor, and don't think Page Industries is going to leave one lying around, not after what you did to the one in Hong Kong.
    JC Denton: I was never properly trained in its operation.
    Walton Simons: Laugh it up, Denton.
  • There's an e-memo in the Majestic-12 sewer base from a Dr. Harleen Quinzel talking about a "company picnic", as if they were just a corporate business.
  • JC's player-defined personality combined with his monotone can result in some pretty hilarious moments if you so choose. For example, after defusing a hostage situation by detonating the bombs killing both the innocent and the terrorists, you can tell two soldiers to use the non-lethal weapons they were given to save more lives. JC's complete disregard for disparencies like this combined with his monotone makes it seem like he is either insane or that he just doesn't give a shit.
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  • In Hong Kong, you can chat with a bartender in the lucky money. At first, you just ask him a simple question about triads... and eventually you'll be chatting about politics and both use the longest words they can come up with.
  • If you break into the storeroom of the nightclub in Paris (which sadly has more chips than clips) you'll get a message from Icarus noting that since you like casually breaking the law, you should join Majestic-12.
  • Near the end of the game, in the nuclear silo, you meet a captured scientist, who tells you that the soldiers that locked him up as part of a conspiracy calling themselves Majestic-12, clearly expecting J.C. to dismiss him as a Conspiracy Theorist. J.C., who has spent more than half the game after these guys, only replies with "interesting".
  • In the undersea lab, Walton Simons attempts a final confrontation. With the right augments, you can not only walk right past him, you can steal his submarine and leave him behind to rant to empty air.
  • There's quite a few standout moments in the final level; Area 51.
    • For starters, as you touch down outside the base, you're treated to a rather tense orchestral piece that does well to set the mood for what's to come... and then you find yourself in a fight. At which point, the soundtrack does a complete 180.
    • If JC eluded Simons in an earlier level and runs into him here:
    Walton Simons: You take another step forward and here I am again, like your own reflection in a hall of mirrors.
    JC Denton: That makes me one ugly son of a bitch.
    • If the player keeps revisiting the same locations, Bob will mock, "Lost?" Bonus points if the player really is lost.
    • And when JC and Bob Page finally come face to face
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