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Funny / Demetri Martin

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  • During Will Forte's soulful solos in "Personal Information Waltz," Demetri himself can't help but break into laughter.
    • Also in "Personal Information Waltz,"
      Will: Panchos, chasm, other previous jokes, fortnight, fortnight! Fort—n—ight.
  • From his stand-up special "Person": "I wanna put stickers on turtles! I don't know why!"
  • "When someone shows you photos of their kid, what they don't want to hear is 'Oh yeah, I got some photos of your kid too.'"
  • "If I owned a bookstore, I'd make the Mystery section really hard to find."
  • "I wonder what was the most intelligent thing ever said starting with the word 'dude'."
  • "I'm not much of an athlete. I was on the basketball team for my church community center, but that was only because I was Greek and had legs."
  • "When you're having sex with somebody, you can say "yes" or "yeah" or "uh huh." But for some reason you can't say "yep."