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Funny / Cyborg 009

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2001 series

  • Love all the banter in episode one.
    009: Why is it that no matter where I go or how carefully I follow your directions...I keep bumping into the enemy?
    001: Oh, sorry. I wanted to see the extent of your abilities.
    009: When I see you I'm gonna punch your lights out!
    • Later... After 009 sees he's a baby.
    • "You're on flight 002. Don't fight everything so much. Relax, or you'll fall!"
  • In the episode "The Hero", Cyborg 002 (Jet) meets a little boy whom he tells stories of the Cyborgs. Of course he's the hero of said stories.
  • 002's inital reaction to the name of their captured vessel, the Dolphin.
    002: WHAT!?
    • Double when the Cyborgs are actually trying to paint the Dolphin's facade. Specially when they start fighting over it and using their powers to win.
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  • 002 vs. Phil the Psychic Assassin. 002's Gag Nose. Phil gets close and, when he's about to get captured, he bites on 002's nose to get free.
  • The end of "Man or Machine." 002, 004 and 009 tells Gilmore that he should get married. Gilmore retorts that he doesn't need to, and besides 006 is the best team mom around. Cue to the cyborgs imagining 006 dressed as an old woman and trying to use his powers to take care of Gilmore.
  • 002 lamenting his inability to cook.
  • The second episode has the team make a harsh crash-landing into a cave. When the ship is brought to a full stop, 002 asks, "Well, is everyone alright?" We see that everyone else ended up knocked back in a jumbled heap in the back of the ship.
    007: *trapped under 005* Well I'm not alright, someone get me out of here!
    • This is followed up with the team enjoying a meal 006 made for them. 003 and 007 really enjoy it until they find out the meat is.
    006: I made a Cambodian dish with Chinese barbecue sauce. I used a whole lot of them. *indicates upward at bats covering the ceiling.
    007 & 003: *SQUICK*
    006: I bet you'll never guess what I used to make the stew!
    007: *noticing a snake slithering by* That's okay, you don't have to tell us!

1979 series

  • In episode 3, 'The Giant of the Arc de Triumph', 007 changes into a flying fish to avoid an attack from the giant.
    002: You moron! Fish can't fly!
    • A few episodes later, he does it again.
    006: Fishes can't float around in midair, so stop transforming into one! It's utter nonsense!


Birth arc:

  • After the team first escapes the Black Ghost scientists and rendezvous on X Island, they're hungry and decide to go hunting for food. Joe can only watch and react in shock and confusion as his fellow team members gather wildlife to eat. 002 gathers up a bunch of birds (and eggs) so 004 can chop them up for their meat. 004 nonchalantly describes his abilities to the bewildered 009:
    I make an excellent minced meat, you know. My left hand can function as a knife. See! And my right hand, a machine gun. It does all sorts of tricks. Haven't even tested most of them. It's like I'm a living, breathing weapon. The scientists nicknamed me "The God of Death".
    • This is followed by 006 suddenly bursting from the ground and startling 009:
    004: 006's codename is "The Mole!"
    009: Oh my god, he's dug through solid rock!
    • Some time later, 001 is in need of milk, so 002 goes dashing off and brings back a goat- and proceeds to start milking it in front of the team.
  • When 007 first demonstrates his transformation ability, he begins to strip down, leading to another comically startled reaction from 009:
    009: WHAT!?
    004: We call 007 "Chameleon". He can change his cellular structure into any shape he chooses!
  • While the group is trying to escape past a group of enemy soldiers trying to find them, 007 comes up with the brilliant plan of shapeshifting into one of the Black Ghost's scientists and pretending he lost his clothes while swimming. He gets found out in seconds, because the soldiers knew where the real scientist was and that scientist also couldn't swim. The team has to just knock out the soldiers to move on. This is all also lampshaded by 004:
    Oh yeah, an old man. That'll blend in nicely!

Assassins arc:

  • As 009, 007, and 004 are trying to escape from 0012, a sentient mansion controlled by a woman's brain, we get this exchange note :
    007: Me mum laughed like that.

Yomi arc:

  • Viina has been giving 004 exposition on her history. 004, not buying it and becoming quite tired of her jabbering, spins around and yells "Stop trying to explain things!"


  • When the group is trying to track down a secret island with the latest Black Ghost missile weapon on it, they decide to find the place by having 008 knock out and abduct several of the Black Ghost's dolphin scouts. 004 tries to communicate with them telepathically for interrogation, only to note that it isn't working. 009 advises him to try again, after they've woken up.
  • This exchange, courtesy of 007:
    007: We're going to have to grab that rocket and drag it back to Earth!
    009: How do you stop a rocket?
    007: Well... you use another rocket... or something.
  • In the chapter "In Pursuit", 009 and 007 are following a girl being dragged off by some shady men. Joe notes with some dismay that the men have a getaway car, only for 007 (who had transformed into a dog as a disguise) to notice a taxi and exclaim, "Well, whaddaya know, a taxi! I love living in a comic!" He then proceeds to flag down the taxi while still in dog form, causing the taxi driver no end of confusion ("Eh? I could have sworn that dog just waved me down..."). When 009 and 007 hop in the taxi, the driver informs them dogs can't ride in the cab. 007, again while still a dog, responds with, "No dogs allowed, is it?" and then transforms back into a (naked) man, irritably asking, "Anything else?" The cab driver runs away, forcing the cyborgs to have to chase the girl on foot anyway.
  • In one story arc, the cyborgs find an escaped convict who apparently was a witness to some very strange things they want to investigate... but the trauma of it all caused him to regress to a childlike state. The cyborgs start trying to put him in various frightening situations with the hope that shocking him enough will cause him to snap out of it. 008's plan was to ride the convict on his back through the water at a fast pace. It... isn't too successful.
    Convict: *happily clapping his hands Yah, yaha!
    008: No use...he thinks it's fun.
  • When 009, 006, and 007 have to escape from an enemy's attacks, 007 goes missing. 006 is convinced he's dead and is a Large Ham in his grief.
    006: Nnohoho, Great's dead and gone, I can feel iiiit! I'll never get to return the five yen I borrowed!
    007: *reappearing* That's not true at all! Fork it over.
    • The follow-up is priceless - 007 asks if he can get a free dinner from 006's restaurant, while 006 kisses 007's head until 007 gets disgusted and towels it off. Then, 007 asks in all seriousness for 006 to pony up the money, while 006 tries to get out of it.
  • During the Northern Gods/Edda arc, 002 is flying around when he suddenly loses consciousness and falls to the ground head first. 007 tries to catch him by his nose but that's obviously not enough to break Jet's fall, and he ends with his nose plunged deep into the ground.
  • In the Lorelei Song arc, Joe boards a plane and goes to visit Albert in Germany. During the flight he's approached by a hostess who, speaking in German, asks him how he's doing and if he needs anything. He thanks her in German, and she compliments him for how well he speaks. She walks away, and a flustered Joe openly admits he didn't actually understand a single word she had just said.

Archaia graphic novel

  • While 006 is cooking for the team, he and 005 have this exchange:
    006: You know Junior, that lizard would make a great soup.
    005: No.
    • Adding to this is the lizard in question's distressed reaction and expression.
  • There's also the exchange between 004 and 007, as the group steals a jet to first escaping Black Ghost and 004 takes the controls.
    007: Are you sure you know how to do this?
    004 (still recovering his memories): I was a captain in the German air force - and a pilot for Lufthansa airlines...I think...
    007: You think? Oh, blimey.
  • After blowing up Black Ghost's hide-out, 007 asks "Think they'll mind our redecorating?" 005's response? "I hope so".
  • While breaking into one of Black Ghost's bases, 009 finds himself captured by a worker there. The "worker" tells 009, "I'm taking you directly to Sekar" before revealing himself as a disguised 007 and finishing, "So we can save the world!" 009 just comments "A bit dramatic, wouldn't you say?"

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