The Vasselheim story arc splits the party into two groups to prove their worth to the "Slayer's Take," a local adventurer's guild in the continent of Vasselheim. This arc features guest appearances by Felicia Day, Mary Elizabeth McGlynn, Wil Wheaton, and Will Friedle, adding a new twist to the now-divided adventuring band. This arc also includes the first backstory related episode (episode 22), as Keyleth visits a related druid tribe.
- Scanlan gets the episode off to a flying start by mourning for Pike's departure in his own unique way: By finding a secluded spot in the ruined temple of Sarenrae and taking a huge dump while humming Boyz II Men's "How Do I Say Goodbye to Yesterday". Suffice to say, the whole cast loses it.Orion: This is not romantic at all, you know that, right?Matt: (to the audience) Welcome back guys!Laura: Oh, I missed you guys.
- Bonus points for the fact that the cast starts figuring out what Sam is about to do right after Matt mentions that Scanlan feels a rumbling in his stomach.
- To top it off, since Scanlan downed a potion before doing his business, Matt makes the mistake of mentioning that Scanlan's turd is blue in color. Cue the rest of the cast bickering in their usual manner about how to respond to this situation, while a clearly embarrassed Matt just hangs his head in his hands.Sam: I left a magic dump!Travis: Should we collect the dump? [...] I think we need the blue shit!Marisha: Can you cast detect magic on the poo?
- Before heading into an arena pit, Scanlan tells Grog to think of a fighting pseudonym. His answer...Grog: PHILLIP!
- Scanlan's entire plan of how to occasionally check in on their MIA teammate.
- Grog's Heroic BSoD after losing the fight is as much hilarious as it is sad to watch.Scanlan: That's not even chicken, that's just a piece of wood!
- What's even sadder is that Grog had actually beaten his opponent (Matt said he was at -5 HP), but thanks to a racial ability of orcs to bring themselves back to 1 HP from what would otherwise be a death-dealing blow, Grog's opponent was able to land a knockout blow on him instead. The half-orc essentially used Once More to get the final hit. THAT... is depressing on a whole other level.
- Vex is the one who asks where the nearest whorehouse is (which is funny on several levels):Tiberius: Don't put on that red light.Vex: We'll get you ice cream, Grog. And a whore. How's that sound?
- Matt hilariously describes a sloppy-drunk Grog's... inability to perform after spending most of the night at the bar. It was not a good day for our favorite Barbarian.
- Then to top it all off, the group takes their mid-session break immediately after it. It's finally too much for Travis, who storms off and delivers a great off-camera F Bomb.
- Tiberius's morning-after intervention, where he asks the bartender to replace Grog's ale with water. Grog's too hung over to notice.Grog: It's pretty smooth.
- Matt reminds the party to mark off their expenses, including their gambling losses from Grog's defeat.Travis/Grog: (pouting) Where do I mark off my loss of pride?Matt: (mimicking Travis) That would be under "Additional Notes."
- A bit unrelated, but when the party is making their preparations to fight the Hydra, Travis shines the laser pointer in his eyes, capping off this series of embarrassing events for Travis/Grog.
- Right before the Crucible fight, Keyleth polymorphs into her tiger form (nicknamed "Minxy") for no apparent reason. She stays that way through the night, then frightens a guest at the inn when she goes upstairs to look for the others.Marisha: Why does this always happen to me?
- Vax hears the commotion and finds her, and she rolls over onto her back and demands her belly rubbed. Vax does so... then Laura and the chat point out that he essentially just groped Keyleth.
- Scanlan's unfortunate double entendre:Scanlan: I'm going to turn us all deep green. With Seeming.Vax: With what now?Scanlan: Seeeeeming. I spread my Seeming all over us. Turning us green. With Seeming all over us.Percy: Nothing you can't ruin.
- Sam singing along to the fight music during the battle with the hydra.
- The guy from Slayer's Take yells at Vox Machina "What the FUCK WERE YOU DOING?!", they innocently reply "Killing a hydra?" totally unaware they've done anything wrong.
- Zac once again puts his foot in his mouth — as a result of hitting 5,000 subscribers he would have to wear a penguin kigurumi the day after. His apparent off-screen reaction to this: Screw This, I'm Outta Here!
- "The [person] you're looking for is...on the other page."
- One of the letters includes the line 'May your dice be blessed by anyone but Wil Wheaton.' Guess who was announced to be one of the guest stars minutes prior?
- The final gift of the episode — a selfie stick for Matt.
- While Matt is introducing the show, he gets a random peck on the cheek from Orion.Matt: Mysterious headkiss. This is the best Thursday ever!
- Percy/Taliesin putting his foot up on the table, much to the chagrin of Vex'ahlia/Laura.
- When Scanlan's introducing himself to Zahra...Scanlan: Me? Well, I'm known by different names in different places...Grog: Ain't that the truth.Scanlan: Some call me Kingslayer...some call me Scanlan...some just call me when they want a good time.
- Lyra's Establishing Character Moment is arriving late, tripping and scattering papayas across the guild's lobby floor. Then she bursts into apologies and excited greetings. The rest of her introduction is also hilarious, and Mertin as Straight Man to her enthusiasm makes it even funnier.
- Vex, noticing Grog is getting bored (a dangerous thing for everyone), points out the papaya Lyra spilled on the floor, and Grog immediately starts devouring it. Then Trinket wanders in and starts eating it too, and Grog play-fights him over it. Percy, who missed breakfast, comments that he's hungry before hastening to clarify that he's not so hungry he'd eat papaya off the floor. Beautiful improvisation from all concerned.
- Zahra's introduction as she walks into the room and says "I don't know you," to everyone but Grog, who she knew due to his fight with the Hammer. Grog immediately says that was Philip the Terrible, not Grog the Unintimidated. The entire time Zahra is just indifferent to everyone.
- The Ro-Sham-Bo battle between Vex and Zahra.
- When Mary learns Zahra can't use Mask of Many Faces to copy the appearance of someone she hasn't met, she lets out a frustrated "Oh, BALLS!" (Which she later intensifies as "Balls and a half!")
- For some reason Grog is really eager to help make a campfire. First he really wants to contribute some firewood from the Bag of Holding, then he gets super excited over cutting down a tree (and says to the rest of them "Don't tell Keyleth,") then he tries and fails to light the fire after several solid minutes and pouts when Vex does it in half a second.
- Made even better when you stop to realize that Travis voiced another character who is "useless in the rain".
- Vex and Zahra's campsite fire is overall sweet, but there is this moment when Vex mentions that her father is still alive. Zahra asks "what is he", presumably in the sense of "is he human or elf" or "what is his profession", but Vex nonchalantly replies "an asshole". Then Zahra cheerfully concurs that they have something in common, because her (dead) father wasn't a pleasant individual either.
- Grog gets into an encounter in the wilderness and gleefully bellows "PLAY TIME!" Matt then chooses that time to...go on break, much to the chagrin of everyone else. When they come back, then he tells them to roll initiative, catching everyone off guard.
- Percy's gunslinging rampage is done in his pyjamas, with his butt showing.Taliesin: I'm wearing the pyjamas with the butt-flap, and the butt-flap is down. The butt-flap is DOWN!
- Later, Matt reminds Taliesin that, since he's already established that he's wearing the pyjamas with the butt-flap, Percy's Armor Class is lower than normal. Taliesin vows revenge.
- The group manages to capture and interrogate one of the enemies, an orc, for information about the dragon. The moment the prisoner has nothing more to say, Grog (because it's Grog) decapitates him. What makes this a winner:
- Scanlan's total indifference. "Oh no. Stop. Wait."
- Lyra is outraged because it's not how she wants to conduct things "as the leader" and calls a Talk Circle. Grog tries to make amends by offering her the orc's severed head to keep, incidentally getting brain matter all over her clothes. "There's loads of stuff in it!"
- Percy's obviously put off but tries to rally by joking about taking a tongue instead of the whole head - which Grog decides to actually do, causing Percy to Face Palm.
- After an off-hand question from Percy, making camp to rest is officially (that is, by Lyra) re-designated "Sleepytimes."
- As they ride for the dragon's lair, Lyra (with some excellent comedic timing from Felicia) tells the party aaaaaaall about Aldor. Scanlan eggs her on the entire time, leaving Vex and Percy near-comatose from boredom while Grog and Zahra make a deal.Grog: Can we make an agreement? I kill you, you kill me?Zahra: Yes.
- Grog knows things. Watch Percy/Taliesin looking more and more scandalised, too.Scanlan: Grog, what's the term for when your penis is inverted? The opposite of a boner?Grog: Bellybutton.
- Matt ruling on Lyra's various failed checks.Matt: (insight on a prisoner) He looks...constipated?Matt: (religion on a distant glowing blue thing in some ruins) It's spooky and you don't like it.Matt: (perception on finding a path up a mountain) You've read about mountains and you've seen pictures of them, but you've never seen one up close. They're a lot bigger than you thought they'd be.
- Laura playing as Grog. Priceless.
- Rolling a 1 as the first thing Laura-Grog does is phenomenal.Travis: I heard I rolled really well in the beginning of this.Matt: Yeah, wonderfully. (makes a 'shhhh' motion to the camera)
- Apparently according to Laura, Giant sounds a little bit like a cross between Tim "the Tool Man" Taylor and Taz the Tasmanian Devil.
- Rolling a 1 as the first thing Laura-Grog does is phenomenal.
- After essentially pulling off a Thanos and disintegrating a giant, Lyra attempts to deliver a Bond One-Liner in Giant... that basically means, "My cat is your friend."
- Matt's comment that the most dangerous class in D&D is being a mother or a parent of any kind and to never have children in a fantasy world because you won't last past 30.
- For once, Scanlan tries to be the trap detector of the team. It...doesn't go well.
- In a hilarious Call-Back to before the campaign was livestreamed, Scanlan introduces himself to Rimefang as Burt Reynolds. Hilarity Ensues.
- Specifically, Matt - in character as Rimefang - addresses Scanlan as "Burt" and only narrowly manages to avoid cracking up entirely.
- "You leave when Burt Reynolds tells you to leave!"
- Somehow, Felicia rolls -1 for initiative against Rimefang.
- Felicia: I'm never going! I'm just going to have a snack.
- The chat rolls a natural 1 on research checking when it turns out Dragons being Vex's favored enemy doesn't give her advantage on her rolls.
- Matt: The chat would like to Rage.
- Grog rescues Scanlan from death's door by rage-feeding him a potion and then slinging him across the floor like a curling stone.
- Vex fires an exploding arrow right after Percy's grenade explodes, leading to Matt describing the hilarious image of Grog and Scanlan ducking and taking cover twice in a row, and Percy...er...'apologizing'.Percy: I'm sorry, I'm a genius, I'm sorry! Oh, god I'm clever!
- Turns out Vanessa and her husband had a bet going to see if Vex's team would make it back alive. (To her credit, Vanessa did bet in favor of the team.)
- Zahra's conversation with Trinket is both this and heartwarming. First he tells Zahra that he'll do anything to protect his Vex (at which Vex/Laura squees in joy), then Zahra asks him if he's a boy (while the party says he's a guy) and Trinket leans back in a position that shows his genitalia. Lyra covers her eyes and says "Eww!" but Scanlan says "It's like looking in a mirror!" with a grin.
- After Trinket nuzzles Vex to show affection, Lyra says she wishes Aldor would do that to her. Scanlan replies "Show you his giant cock?" and everyone cracks up. Lyra ends up saying "I saw it once, it was glorious!"
- While Lyra was politely declining membership in Vox Machina:Lyra: I really appreciate it, but um — given the kiss that we had [Scanlan], I realize why Aldor doesn't love me is that I don't have enough experience — sexually. So, I need to stay in town to spread my wings in that area.Zahra: Spread your what?
- Even though Percy and Vex had it covered, Grog rolls a history check on the contract writer. It ends very poorly.
- One of the fan letters is essentially a restraining order for Lyra from Aldor.
- When Rimefang attempts to sway the mind-controlled Frost Giants to his side:Mary/Zahra: I use... fuck me.(everyone loses it)Felicia: What's the DC on that?Mary: It's very high!
- Both guest stars role play a charisma Dump Stat, Vax is irritable because he's separate from his twin, and then there's Tiberius "I'm usually the grumpy one" Stormwind. Because of this, the chatroom dubs them "Team Grumpy".
- EVERYTHING between Keyleth and Kashaw.Kashaw: Is she always like this?
- Kashaw and Thorbir having trouble with Tiberius' name becomes a Running Gag through the first half of the episode.
- Triple combination of a Funny Moment, Moment of Awesome, and a Tear Jerker: The Wheaton Dice Curse rears its head once again. Not even Matt switching their d20s helps. (And Matt's increasing disbelief and astonishment is amusing, also.) According to Wil, he rolled five 1s that night.Wil: HAHA, THERE IT IS!Orion: 20?
- "Please let me step into a bucket..."
- Matt's theory: "I don't know what ancient Aztec deity's temple you defaced when you were a child..."
- He critically fails a History check for information about a wealthy merchant, so Matt rules that on top of knowing nothing, he can't remember the guy's name.
- Wil's final roll of the night after the game has wrapped up? 19.
- Just before the break, Wil turns the failed History check into a Brick Joke by suddenly shouting "Tyrell! Now I remember!"
- Vax and Keyleth dress in fancy robes to fit in with the Velvet Caberet, and Keyleth Adorkably asks if they can have aliases. Vax instantly shoots down her being Vex "because that would be weird" (possibly because of his feelings for her), only for him to take "Scanlan Shorthalt".Keyleth: Oh, I can't be Vex but you can be Scanlan? That's a Double Standard!
- Meta example: Laura did not react well to Kashaw's idea of trying to score a date with Vex.
- And it was prompted by Kashaw asking Vax what his twin sister looks like. Vax points at himself.
- Kash's reaction to Vax's invented backstory for "Scanlan of the Short Halts".Kashaw: You have a Gnome. Shoe. Empire.
- Liam is running a little late coming back from the bathroom after the break. ("He's stealthed. He rolled a 28 and disappeared!") The others agree that when he comes back, they'll just stare at him awkwardly. Liam's reaction to this treatment is what takes the cake.Liam: (deadpan, without prompting) Disadvantage on my next five attacks.
- As the party decides on their roles for infiltration, Keyleth and Vax discuss her posing as his wife. Cue a storm of awkward as Matt looks on very intently. Incidentally, he was just about to drink something and the result was just short of a Spit Take.
- Thorbir's opinion of an elven wine vintage: Giant Dwarven Airquotes, "wine".
- When things were about to throw down, Keyleth uses windwall to close the doors, shutters, and blow out all candle lights.Keyleth: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that, I... I sometimes... get a little out of control, but remain calm, alright!? Jesus... REMAIN CALM!Tiberius: Look, you calm down!Keyleth: (not calm) I'M SORRY! I'M TRYING TO REMAIN CALM, TOO!Kashaw: (deadpan) Doing a great job.Keyleth: (still freaking out) THANK YOU! ...OKAY!
Matt: (points to Marisha) Persuasion Check.Marisha: Dammit! note
- Right after that:
Tiberius: More calm, more calm, more calm.Kashaw: (deadpan) Still doing a great job with the calm.Keyleth: (still not calm) I'm trying. Sorry, I get emotional.Kashaw: (deadpan) I got it. Yeah.
- And as they're grilling Vince for information:
- After chasing Hozin and realizing after he No Sells a few spells that he's probably the Rakshasa they're looking for, Tiberius dashes back to the others to inform them. But in the heat of the moment he can't get out many coherent words, leading the others to think he's speaking Draconian.
- As the rest of the group are failing to find any secret passages in a room, Wil Wheaton's character intervenes... and somehow manages an Epic Fail on an action that doesn't require a dice roll.Wil: [As Thorbir] So I look around, I look at the rug, I sigh heavily, and I pull the rug.Matt: You pull the rug (woosh) ...revealing a wooden floor.Marisha/Keyleth: [Laughs] You thought that was going to be good! [Everyone at the table cracks up]
- After a few too many terrible rolls, Kashaw winds up making an Insight check on Thorbir out of suspicion that 1) Thorbir is deliberately sabotaging the group and/or 2) the Slayer's Take is actually composed of idiots, because he can't think of a good reason anyone could be that unhelpful.
- When Kashaw slips and goes deeper into the tunnel, Tiberius and Keyleth can't help themselves and willingly slide after him for fun.
- For his first turn, Tiberius spends six minutes using two spells and doing the math for them, as Marisha jokingly says upon his turn finally ending, "I knitted a sweater."
- Keyleth wants you to be our guest. None of the others are even slightly into it, possibly due to the acid-dunking they know to be imminent. Poor Keyleth.
- The Wheaton Dice Curse comes back with a vengeance. In particular, the initiative roll after Wil finally lands Natural 20 promptly restores the balance.
Wil: 20, MOTHERFUCKERS! I want to know everything about him. I want to know his parents' name, I want to know his Social Security Number, I want to know what his bank account balance is, and I WANT TO KNOW HIS ASHLEY MADISON PASSWORD!
- And what did Wil — who's playing a dwarven fighter, remember — roll that 20 on? An Insight check.
- Fighters of Thorbir's level get three attacks, but the Wheaton Curse reduces them all to failure (2,3,1). Matt narrates this as Thorbir failing to hit any rats when he is standing on top of a swarm of them.
- Due to the Wheaton Curse, one of the rats bites Thorbir in his Dwarf Crotch. This is totally a canonical thing in all games.
- Kashaw takes part of his turn in combat to say "Seriously?"
- Tiberius Kraghammer gets a callback.
- When the carpet loses its enchantment from the acid, Vax laments that Vex is going to kill him. Indeed, you could hear a Big "NO!" from Laura right as he says this. The best part is the timing.Vax: Vex is gonna kill us.
Kashaw: Who's that?
(Laura's and Travis's screams echo from the other room, since they just saw what happened on a delay. Liam cringes.)
Vax: My sister.
- A possessed Vax attacks Kashaw three times...which Liam O'Brien finds hilarious for some reasonKashaw/Wil: WHY ARE YOU SMILING?
- Rakshasa! *jazz hands*
- When at last they kill their target, Keyleth asks who has the contract for it. Everyone else says "not me". For a moment, there is fear that they left it back at the Slayer's Take guildhall. Then it turns out that Keyleth had it the whole time, but forgot.
- More Wheaton Curse jokes. In the previous episode, Wil W said that his improbable bad luck balanced the universe against someone's else improbable good luck. In this episode, several people score natural 20s. After Marisha's second consecutive one, this exchange happens.Matt: There is a purpose you serve.Wil W: And there is balance on both sides of the room.
- Kashaw's more than a little squeamish at having to harvest the remains of the Rakshasa. Wil gets Matt to lose it with one line:Kashaw: Thorbir, you want the taint? There's tons of magic in it.(Matt actually collapses laughing)
- Kashaw's exit. He pays his respects to the party, turns to Keyleth and tells her, "And you... you might be the most annoying person I've ever met in my life." Then he kisses her, winks, and walks out. It's Keyleth's First Kiss, too!
- Laura and Wil both lament that a chance for them to play in the same sessions together was missed. (Nodding to both of them appearing in Titansgrave, of course.)Laura: We could've both been rolling 1s!Wil: Get Yuri in here and we'll create a singularity.
- Matt's at a loss for words with the last present, but...Matt: ...Well, guys... roll initiative.Everyone Else: Oh, Crap!
- The first thing Taliesin does in the episode is clear the air of Wil's shit rolling, or try to. It doesn't help — he eventually did roll a 1.
- Travis's advice on the Gynosphinx:Travis: You saw Harry Potter. The hippogriff will jack you up. BOW BACK.
- Vex comments that Vanessa won't be happy with what she sees through Scanlan's eyes. Playing for an absent Sam, Matt just nods enthusiastically in response.
- Vax reporting on the Big Damn Kiss:Vax: He planted one on Keyleth.Grog: Planted one what? Like a tree?
- The instant Vanessa dismisses Vox Machina, they immediately talk about their experiences while divided. Like kids who want to confuse their parent, Tiberius, Vax and Keyleth are all talking over each other trying to explain how the carpet lost its flying enchantment. Even Grog is suspicious:Grog: I'm sorry, you said it went in the acid?
Vax: Just a little bit, but only completely.
- Vex is distraught, then she allows that if the whole team collects their money, they might buy a new enchantment:Vex: It's OK, we'll just pool out funds together and find somebody to do the enchantment! You didn't spend any money?
Tiberius: ...well, we spent a lot.
Keyleth: I mean, no!
Vax: But we're still alive!
- Percy is so overwhelmed by their stories he can only exasperatedly complain about his bunkmate:
- Vex giving Grog a "Shut Up" Kiss to stop his complaining about not getting a kiss compared to Keyleth and Scanlan.
Grog: What the fuck just happened?
- More specifically, Laura actually gives Travis a big kiss to literally shut him up, hence his bewilderment.
Percy: This is what happens when you de-enchant the carpet!
- Most of the above can be watched in its lunacy on YouTube.
- Describing Zahra featuring Percy's helpful counting.Grog: She had horns -Percy: Two of them.Grog: - and teeth.Percy: More than two.Vex: And eyes!Percy: Definitely two.
- Turns out Pike found the scry-enchanted dump that Scanlan left at the temple.
- "Let's not rub shit on the carpet."
- Keyleth telling the story of Kashaw and her First Kiss is adorable and hilarious, thanks to Marisha's acting. It's even funnier the second time, when she's telling Pike.Pike: (after Keyleth describes the god Vesh) Oh. Ohhhh.Matt: You don't know who that is.Pike: I don't know who that is! (everyone starts laughing)
- Then there's this exchange after Keyleth explains who Vesh is:Vex: Wait, wait, wait. A guy... who's married to a god... kissed you?Percy: Oh, yes, I see how that could work out poorly.Pike: What if she gets... mad?Keyleth: You know, I thought about that a little bit, and then I tried not to think about that a lotta bit, so... yes.
- Then there's this exchange after Keyleth explains who Vesh is:
- Tiberius asks Pike to "bless his quarterstaff". Because of Scanlan's long-term influence, this sounds wrong to everyone. The dragonborn quickly clarifies that he means it in a strict, platonic and arcane sense.
- Matt's amazing scene as the pet salesman, and his other stint as the cartographer. For example:Tiberius: (after buying a sickly pseudodragon) Any tips for - you know, food-wise...?Matt: Don't let it die. Feed it. Give it water.
- Naturally, Grog is the exact opposite of Vex when it comes to haggling — he gives away more than what the merchant asked for in exchange for a potion. Percy was there, but became too appalled to speak.Grog: Vex will be so proud of me!
- Vex's reaction? "I Hunter's Mark him. Level three."
- Vex gets completely plastered due to Vax losing the carpet's enchantment and Grog's attempt at haggling the merchant. And possibly due to kissing Grog himself beforehand.Vax: This one started before we got here. (Laura points to her tankard with a mouthful of ale) Just keep 'em coming.
- A particularly loud belch in the room causes Keyleth to compliment Grog. Marisha's wrong — it was Laura! Everyone's reaction to that is what sells it.
- The group feels proud of their high-brow jokes:Percy is examining two different paths.Percy: That wouldn't make much of a difference.Matt: (smugly) We're cultured.
- When the Fire Ashari trap the party in a wall of stone, Grog does a strength check and Pike decides to assist. Grog rolls a 19 and Pike decides not to assist and it turns heartwarming for a moment as Grog says he'll welcome Pike's help anytime. It then turns funny again.Pike: I rolled a 9. Tink!
- As Matt describes the volcano and the Plane of Fire, the party feels the inhospitable conditions. Except for Tiberius; being a red dragonborn he thinks it's a vacation spot. Orion mimes him sunning himself. It's kind of like a Funny Background Event.
- Even during the boss battle, when the fire elementals set him on fire and Tiberius takes damage, Orion continues the joke.
- Keyleth transforms into a water elemental to take on a fire elemental. Matt points out that her attack means she catches on fire... then immediately houserules that no, a water elemental can't catch on fire. Because that's stupid.
- At one point in the battle, Grog's beard once again catches on fire.Matt: The smell of burning hair once again reaches your nostrils.(Travis frowns)Liam/Vax: It could be your pubes; don't jump to conclusions!Travis/Grog: I'm hairless! I don't have any pubes!
- In an attempt to end the fight, Tiberius asks the last fire elemental, "Do you really need me to do this?" Matt explains that the fire elemental cannot speak, causing Liam to imitate it gurgling through the flames with his arms waving in the air.
- Cue the rest of the group imitating the fire elemental as "like one of those creatures at a gas station", proceeding to wave their arms in the air like inflatable tube men.
- Tiberius stops himself from being on fire by using Control Flames to juggle them.
- One of the presents Travis gets is a consolation medal for his narrow loss at the Crucible. Despite Travis's outrage, Matt decides to make it canon.Travis: (to the gifter) Canada ain't far enough buddy, I'm coming for ya! Son of a bitch, it comes with a ribbon... It just keeps stinging.
- Liam's one-off joke about a "Tiefling Trio" in the previous episode (backed by a fanart piece) is made canon when Scanlan claims to have run into Zahra and had a "slumber party" while the rest of Vox Machina were journeying to Pyrah.Travis: Can I roll to see if he's bullshitting?Matt: You can go ahead, this would be Insight.Travis: Yeah, Grog Insight check! Modifier is 0 — that's a 9.Matt: You are enthralled by his tale.
- Tiberius wants Grog and Kern to have their rematch, so he encourages violence. Grog immediately takes off running through Vasselheim to find his opponent.
- Keyleth's attempt to get an audience for the Grog/Kern rematch.
- Everyone betting on Grog. Percy bets 500 gold, Tiberius bets 612, Grog bets 1363, Vex bets 600, and Keyleth bets... 5.
- Also Scanlan secretly betting 100 gold against Grog.
- Keyleth, again, trying to spread the message about the fight - except that she's whispering to Taliesin, who is in full sass mode:Keyleth: Yeah, yeah, did you see that? Kern's fighting Phillip!Percy: Why are you telling me this? Of course I know.Keyleth: Oh. (to Orion) Kern's fighting -Tiberius: I also know this.Percy: Maybe make a friend. Like a new friend.
- When the fight starts, the party as well as their players are very engrossed in it. In fact, they're even given popcorn!
- Vex's, uh... fanservice. Yeah, fanservice.*
Scanlan: Ohmigod it's her tits it's her tits! She just showed her tits that's inspiring!
- Even better? Scanlan's immediate reaction and the look on both Matt and Travis's faces.
- Matt admits that if it did work, it would have probably caused Grog to drop his rage.
- Scanlan's Cutting Words to Kern during his fight with Grog.Scanlan: Oh, Kern! Do you need some dick? because I gave some to Your Mom last night!
- After the battle, Scanlan goes up to Grog and suggests that he be a graceful winner, find Kern, acknowledge him as a worthy opponent and make sure they understand each other. "You won't feel good about yourself unless you do." With the most perfect comedic timing imaginable, Matt describes a bookie handing Grog a huge sack of gold.Grog: (beat) Fuck that shit.
Taliesen: And that, kids, is Chaotic Neutral.
- Travis saying afterwards that he really was going to do it right up until the gold is arguably the cherry.
- Vex is delighted to hear how much Grog's winnings amount to. So delighted in fact that she puts an arm around Grog and says he can pay her back for how much she lost in his previous fight, like he (supposedly) said he would. Grog immediately does so because of her "dragon eyes of money hoarding".
- Keyleth and Tiberius getting arrested for helping. They get rescued by Scanlan doing his Burt Reynolds routine again.Scanlan: Good thing you were represented by an Ace Attorney!Orion: (in Apollo Justice's voice) HOLD IT!
Matt: However, if I see either of you two causing any trouble anywhere in Vassalheim... it's down to the oubliette you go, you hear me?Scanlan: Ooh, say that word again, what? Oubliette?Matt: (still in character) The (incoherent mumbling and baby noises as he fails to pronounce everything, looking at his hands in horror). What is wrong with me? Get out of here!Everyone: (bursts out laughing)Scanlan: You've been bested!Tiberius: He's speaking Draconian!
- In that very same scene, Matt dissolving into Angrish (in character!) when he tries to pronounce "oubliette".
Taliesin: (in character) "Excuse me? If someone were to be an idiot, where would you hold them while other people decided how much of an idiot they were?"
- It flew over everyone's head (except for Orion), but Taliesin's one liner regarding Tiberius' suggestion they just ask the other guards where they were taken after being arrested.
- The fine for cheating is 500 gold for the pair of them. Vex has to fight the impulse to haggle, succeeds with help from "Burt Reynolds" and then looks physically pained as she parts with the coins.
- Everybody misinterprets Grog's request to go to a tavern, find a young boy, and ask him if he'd like to make some money. He just wants someone to send Kern his participation medal.Travis: You sick fucks!
Scanlan: Would you like any young boys to come with you?
- This gets a Call-Back later when Grog asks for the twins to go with him to speak with Earthbreaker Groon.
- Percy's conversation with Victor the black powder prospector. Taliesin could barely compose himself during the scene, everyone else was flat-out corpsing.
Vex: ...Is that a pig's head?Keyleth: It is literally a pig's head.Percy: I don't - yes. It is in fact a pig's head. It's complicated.
- When Matt first speaks as Victor, Sam and Liam both look over in sync at Matt after looking down at the table/away.
- When Percy leaves the house, after a moment trying to process what just happened, he crowns the whole scene by announcing that he is going to "become very excited at the prospect of a new accent."
- And the result, in which Victor gives Percy a hogshead worth of black powder:
- Percy's visit to the blacksmith's after being covered in blackpowder who repeatedly asks him to not enter the forge and part of Percy's haggling is to promise to shower twice which the blacksmith agrees to.Matt: (as a blacksmith): Remember, bathed.Percy: Very bathed.
- This exchange:Matt: (as a Tavernmaster) Apparently [Earthbreaker Groon] was summoned to watch your battle.Vex: And what does that mean?Matt: (still in character) I have no fucking clue!
- Kynan's meeting with Vox Machina is this, heartwarming and a tearjerker but the funniest parts are when he fanboys over Vox Machina and begging to join and Vax non-lethal sneak attacks him for 66 damage.
- Within it, we have this comment:
- Right after the break, the entire party gets smashed at a pub. It's awesome. Tiberius falls over, and Percy starts slurring out "brilliant but slightly inebriated" thoughts and insulting Keyleth's antlers.Tiberius: I'm sure you'd like to go to a pub of some sorts?Keyleth: We're in a pub!Tiberius: Oh, fuck!Scanlan: That's how drunk we are.