- This gem from the P.E. scene:Amber: My plastic surgeon doesn't want me doing any activity where balls fly at my nose!Dionne: Well, there goes your social life.
- Christian asks Cher if she likes Billie Holiday. She responds, "I love him!"
- A random boy tries to hug Cher, who responds by shoving him away with a very hammy utterance of her catchphrase, "Ugh! As if!"
- Cher's description of Amber: "She's a Monet! You know, looks okay from far away, but up close, she's just a big ol' mess!"
- Murray dropping all pretense of hip-hop coolness and screaming in utter terror while Dionne panics behind the wheel and nearly slams her car into an 18-wheeler.
- Mel is unimpressed by Cher's skimpy designer outfit she wears for her date:Mel: Cher, get in here!Cher: What's up, Daddy?Mel: What the hell is that?Cher: A dress.Mel: Says who?Cher: Calvin Klein.
- When Cher gets mugged, the mugger than orders her to get down on the ground. Cher responds she can't because of her dress; it's "like, a totally important designer."
- His response: "And I will totally shoot you in the head. Get down!"
- The fact that Cher whines like a little child not getting her own way is what really makes the scene.
- The scene are the party where Dionne freaks out about about Murray shaving his head:Dionne: Why do you care what he thinks, Murray? I'm the one who has to look at you! What am I gonna do with you now? And right before the yearbook pictures? What am I gonna tell my grandchildren? You know what? That's it...Murray: That's it!Dionne: You wanna play games?Murray: You wanna play games?Dionne: I'm calling your mother!Murray: Wait! Don't call my mom! Don't call my mom...
- Cher's having her driving test, but she's pretty terrible at it, accidentally scraping a parked car and knocking the side mirror off.Cher: Oops! Should I write them a note?
- When Christian shows up to take Cher out on a date:Mel: Hey, you! I Anything happens to my daughter, I got a .45 and shovel. I doubt anybody would miss you.
- When Cher manipulates and argues her way into higher grades:Mel: What'd you do? Turn in some extra-credit reports?Cher: No.Mel: You take the mid-terms over?Cher: Uh-uh.Mel: You mean to tell me that you argued your way from a C+ to an A-?Cher: Totally based on my powers of persuasion. You proud?Mel: Honey, I couldn't be happier than if they were based on real grades.
- Not too unjustified considering that he's a litigator - a lawyer whose job is to argue cases rather than settle or research.
- "Why should I listen to you anyway? You're a virgin who can't drive."
- Cher and Dion befriending Tai:Cher: Let's do a make-over!(Dion gasp enthusiastly)Tai: No.Dion: Oh, c'mon! Let us! Cher's main thrill in life is a make-over. OK, it gives her a sense of control on a world full of chaos.Cher: Pleeeaaase?Tai: Sure. Why not? Shit! You guys! I have never had straight friends before.(Cher and Dion look at each other in confusion and then awkwardly smile back at Tai.)
Funny / Clueless