- In the first chapter after the prologue, after Shirou defies canon by making nice with Illya, this gem pops up:And though neither of them knew it at the time, they had just ensured that the plans of basically every single person in the conflict to come were going to go completely wrong. Except Rin. Her plans went wrong just fine without any outside help.
- In Chapter 5, Berserker has made short work of Rider and is prepared to do the same to Rin. Shirou won't have this and leaps in front, fully expecting to get skewered. And then Berserker... stops his descending sword, picks up Shirou "with the air of a gorilla lifting a kitten", and gently deposits him to the side. Everyone falls silent in shock (yes, even Shinji)... Then Berserker resumes his assigned task.
- In Chapter 6, we get to the customary "Shirou asks Saber to train him scene", where he promises to be her best pupil ever:Shirou: [smiling widely] Bring it on, sensei. I can take whatever you can dish out!
-Four Hours Later-
[Shirou is bruised, sweating, and gasping for breath]
Saber: Would you like to continue?
Shirou: ... maybe... we... should... stop... for... lunch.
Saber: That would be acceptable, yes.
- Chapter 7, after Shirou arrives home 5 hours late to face Saber and Taiga:Shirou stood before the Judges of Hell, and knew that he was amongst the damned.
- Watching Shinji getting battered in various ways through Chapters 3-5.
- Every single time someone (usually a Servant) applies the Fastball Special. It never gets old. Never.
- Especially when Archer does it to Rin a second time:"I can run! Just set me down and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Rin said, as Archer threw her. He was much stronger than a normal person, and he didn't need much more than a fairly low-key motion of his muscles to manage it. In his defense, though, he didn't throw her into a bush again.
It was a pond.
- Especially when Archer does it to Rin a second time:
- Archer's Ladies and Germs moment in Chapter 3:"Good-bye, Ladies and Gentlemen. Well... ladies, gentleman, and Shinji."
- Rin and Archer's banter (mostly Archer) is invariably hilarious.Rin: If you throw me into a bush again I will smash your face!
Archer: Rin, I am trying to make us not die. If the best way to do this is to throw you into a bush, or throwing you into a bush would make me laugh, or...
Rin: I hate you!
[Archer projects a Kanshou and stabs it into the ground.]
Rin: What was that?
Archer: Strategy. Too complicated for you, I think.
Rin: Ass. LEFT! LEFT!
[Archer dodges an attack.]
Archer: Thanks, missed that one.
Rin: Thank me by dodging the next thirty!
- Chapter 18: Lancer's torture scene.
- Chapter 18: Illya believing an oversized trenchcoat and sunglasses are enough to disguise her quite unique appearance.
- Chapter 19, Saber makes a persuading explanation attempt to Shirou while leaving out important facts of Illyasviel in order to not raise questions about it. And when she finishes a paragraph...There! Informative, and yet leaving out anything that might give away the Lady Einzbern. Saber felt she was doing rather well at this subterfuge thing, and she didn't even have sunglasses.
- Chapter 23 is a much-needed Breather Episode after the last series of events, which of course means plenty of humour. Bright spots include Archer's world-weary snark, Illya's condescending to Rin about being from a "backwater" country (with the "peasant" Rin rising to the bait), and, most of all, Shirou freaking out when he realises that he's been taking Illya on dates. It only gets worse for him when he tries (and fails) to explain what was happening to Rin and Saber. Illya then voices her mistaken belief that he knew they were dates but didn't know she was 19, oblivious to how that's making things worse.
- Chapter 25: Illya walks in on Shiro getting into the bath and is very forward in her advances on him. The dialogue is priceless.Illya: Hell-o!
- Chapter 30: Kirei delivering the most sophisticated bit of Black Comedy to Sakura by casually revealing "in the interests of honesty" that he killed her (and Rin's) birth father.Kirei: If you wish to kill me for this, by all means.
- Archer's snarky response to Dark Sakura's philosophical declaration:Dark Sakura: This world, Angra Mainyu's birthplace, is my nursery. And every single person in it is my beloved child.
[Archer impales her with a sword]
Archer: So, I guess the thing to say now would be 'you're not my real mom'?
- Near the end of Chapter 33: Kid!Gilgamesh appears! And he gets the ball rolling by trolling the heck out of Rin without even noticing. What makes it especially funny is the way he speaks: He's not a jerk, and is even polite, but he's still got Adult!Gilgamesh's arrogance, creating an odd mix of superiority and generosity. Every word out of his mouth is hilarious:Shirou: Oh, hey, he's waking up!
Gil: Yes, he is. He also has too much dignity to be carried like a sack of wheat, so please set him down.
Gil: [Falls over] You didn't see that.
[Illya insults him]
Gil: The King would chastise you, but his legs appear to be not working totally right. He requests you roll him over and prop him against a wall.
[Shirou does so]
Gil: Ah, my thanks, vassal.
Gil: Do not doubt my royalty, peasant.
Gil: [Falls over again] ...I also find my muscles to be quite numb. Please hold me upright.
[Shirou does so]
Gil: Ah, you are a valiant slave. When I next procure a castle, you shall be my primary manservant.
- Kid Gil's words of wisdom and statements of superiority during the last Breather Episode.
- The way Illya's thoughts casually insult Rin.She stepped outside the manor, ignoring the tingling of the exceedingly barbaric bounded field Rin's ancestors had probably cobbled together out of fishing wire and rusty cans, and found a tree.
She knew Shirou had come for her[...] She could taste the power of the Servants that fought alongside him[...] She suspected Rin was probably around, too, though that hardly mattered.
For a moment, the world was right again, as his voice just melted away every last bit of fear and self-loathing and every negative emotion in her heart except the usual hate she felt for Rin.
- Chapter 36 has the standoff between Kid!Gil and Saber Alter. Also doubles as a CMOA.Saber was King Arthur, the wielder of Excalibur, the sword of kings that could shatter armies in a single swing. It gleamed in her hands, a hungry darkness that devoured everything around it, like it was a black hole in her hand. It told the universe: I have crushed nations beneath my boot, and I am stronger then I was then. Kneel or die.
Archer was Gilgamesh, the king of heroes, first and mightiest. The light he emitted was not so brilliant as the perfect radiance of his adult form, but it still shone brightly enough to outline half the mountain in gold, vanishing only where Saber's darkness countered it. It told the universe: I am the barest fraction of what I one day will be, and my power can still shake the heavens. You are nothing before me.
Rin Tohsaka was a human, and she had never felt more human than at that moment. She looked back at forth between them, and said "We should run away." It told the universe: Oh, shit.
- Rin's snarky lines when she and Shirou arrive at the cavern of the Greater Grail.Dark Sakura: There Was a Door, sister dear. I know we left out a little welcome mat for you.
Rin Tohsaka: The tunnels were confusing, and your welcome mat tried to kill us. We decided to let ourselves in. Sakura, you look terrible in black. Kirei, you look terrible alive.
- Kid Gil wondering why his older self likes Saber. Her Excaliburing the mountain gives him a few clues.
- Also, him saying that Gilgamesh never did anything that was illegal... because he made the laws...
- Everyones reactions to post-corruption Saber, particularly her personality.
- During the epic melee between Servants and Angra Mainyu's Curses, Achilles freaks out when Robin Hood suddenly appears next to him in his chariot. While fighting side by side, Francis Drake hits on Karna, which causes the normally unflappable Karna to become nervous. Nero complains about having to fight all by herself, and Tamamo repeatedly points out she's standing right next to her, which Nero ignores.
- When Shirou and Saber finally defeat Emiya Alter and Morgan Le Fay, they are left totally confused because they were so busy fighting that they completely missed Illya and Sakura summoning everyone in the Throne of Heroes.
- The Final Battle in Chapter 43 sees the return of a nearly forgotten Running Gag:Shirou: Wait. First, where are Illya and Sakura?
Medea: Our Masters, you mean? They summoned us all, so Avenger was targeting them specifically. I hid them somewhere safe and warded them to slow its detection efforts. I don't think anyone would find them now.
Shirou: Oh? Where are they?
[Cut to Illya and Sakura lying in a pond]
Illya: I hate your girlfriend.
- Illya and Sakura's Hate at First Sight reaction to Shakespeare.
- Cu Chulainn sees his Caster iteration helping in the fight against Avenger and finds it kinda brain-breaking.
- His reaction when everybody oppose Medea Lily being a leader for being a dark sorceress is to remark that they evidently never met Scathach.
- He also asks why every Greek hero he's met is a total jerk, noting that back in his time, his enemies were much more polite. Except Medb, that is; she was a bitch.
- Archer!Herakles sees Medusa in her Gorgon form. He asks her if she would like to be his fifth wife.
- For that measure, his barely concealed anger every time he interacts with Shakespeare.
- Caster!Gilles de Rais is still his gloriously creepy, insane self who disturbs anyone he meets. Saber confesses she still likes meeting him now better than their last interaction.
- Medea Lily has none of the memories of her other incarnations, so she's understandably confused when every main character and surviving Servant from the Fifth War all tell her that they: don't like her, don't trust her, and barely consider The Apocalypse to be a serious enough reason to work with her instead of killing her immediately.Medea Lily: "Why do you all hate me?!"
- The entire Kangaroo Court scene with Rin, Illya and Saber basically trolling the Association. And then Zelretch joins in on the fun.
- "Was Taiga just awful? I bet she was just awful. Sella hates her. You probably knew that. Why do you let her stay? She eats all the food and smells like alcohol and underachievement. And..."
- Sakura makes several funny remarks while at the Einzbern castle.
Funny / Chaos Theory