- The moment in the pilot that shows off Ben's Butt-Monkey status - he wakes up with no clothes, has to wear a women's silky bathrobe, goes out and bumps into the Carnivale's Giant, is knocked into a puddle of mud and horseshit, and to top it all off, Jonesy makes kissy faces and mocks him in front of everyone.
- Justin and Iris's hilariously pedantic and cliched argument in "After the Ball is Over" - Justin's still fixated on both his weird dreams and perving on his sister in the shower and Iris calls him out on not hearing a word she's just said. His stammered response consists of "is that a new dress?"
- Ben screaming after Sofie when she kicks him out of the car in "Tipton" - then calmly repeating himself:Ben: Crazy damn bitch![Car reverses.]Sofie: What did you call me?Ben: (deadpan) I called you a crazy damn bitch.
- Samson's half-assed, self-conscious chanting during the revival show in "Tipton".Samson: Jesus... Jesus... Jesus...
- From "Black Blizzard":Lila: Jonesy? That boy don't squat unless Samson says "shit".Samson: Shit!
- The "Fireball Show" in "Insomnia" where Stumpy successfully shows the crowd a Man Eating Chicken. The reactions on the crowd are just priceless.Stumpy: Behold! The MAN EATING CHICKEN!
- After their unsucessful visit to the Templar Lodge:Samson: Bunch of fat buckwheats!Ben: What'd you expect? Black capes and... horns?Samson: (cracks up laughing) They was playin' gin rummy!
- Stumpy gleefully asking Sofie's crystal ball: "What color is my piss gonna be tomorrow?!"
- Ruthie's freakout when she sees Stroud kidnap Scudder and she thinks she's still seeing ghosts."They have cars!"
- The lengths the carnies go to in order to invent shows can be pretty funny. Further, Stumpy's sales pitch for every cootch show is based on hyping the event by exaggerating it, while going by whatever theme is on that night. Some of the things Stumpy slaps together are pretty chuckle-worthy.
Stumpy: Find out if it's true what they say about Eastern women: Is the basket swinging straight up and down... or sideways?
- Such as when Sofie pretends to be an Oriental cootch dancer:
- After Management dies, the image of his face appears on his pillowcase (a la The Shroud of Turin). Sampson shows it to to Ben and says "Look at what you killed, you ignorant hayseed!".
- Sampson taking the piss out of Heroic Sacrifice in this blasphemous screed.Sampson: What the hell is it with you people?Ben: What do you mean?Sampson: You know what I mean. Management, you, Jesus, John the Baptist, the whole bunch of you! All fired up to throw your lives away.Ben: They did what they had to do.Sampson: Hogwash. You think the Lord had to die to make his point? What if when they said, "Come on down from that cross" old Jesus just come on down and spit right in their eye? What harm would that have done?Ben: That's about the dumbest thing I ever heard.Sampson: No, it ain't! The dumbest thing is dying when you ain't got to. Dying, just 'cause you're piss-poor at living.
Funny / Carnivāle