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    In General 

    Season 1 
Episode 1: Escape from Camp Campbell
  • As they wait for the bus bringing the new campers, David becomes a bit suspicious as to why Max is out there waiting with him.
  • Nikki's Establishing Character Moment comes by biting David's hand with all the ferocity of a bulldog, before claiming that it was to "assert dominance."
  • Cameron Campbell shows himself to be a perfect example of a Ron Swanson-style manly-man, who blames "video games, the Internet, and the Affordable Care Act" on why kids don't like going to summer camp any more.
  • The Official Camp Campbell Salute. It's the Shocker.
  • Nerris is introduced whacking Harrison with a wooden sword and throwing a bunch of dice at him while yelling "Lightning bolt!"
  • When Neil explodes about the state of "science camp", Max says "Check out the balls on new kid." Nikki checks herself.
  • David gets hit by the bus. Complete with a girly scream. Twice.
  • Campbell's Rousing Speech is interrupted by some men in suits driving up and shooting at him. While using Space Kid as a shield, Campbell radios for a chopper to take him away.
    David: Wait! Where are you going?
    Campbell: To the nearest international waters, Davey! Have a happy summer, kids, and Campe Diem!
  • Nikki distracts David by asking him to sing the Camp Campbell song.
    Gwen: Oh, Jesus Christ, no.
    David: [bursts into song]
    Gwen: [interrupts the song halfway through] The kids are gone.
    [pan out to reveal three knit dummies where Max, Nikki, and Neil were standing]
  • Gwen taking David's guitar before he can pull it out and bashing her co-worker's head with it.

Episode 2: Mascot

  • Max attempting to murder David with a Rube Goldberg rock catapult. He accidentally knocks their mascot, a hamster, out of David's hand instead, launching it to a nearby island.
    Max: [to David after launching a large rock that reads "FUCK THE POLICE" at Larry the Hamster] Aw man... That was supposed to kill you.
  • David trying to convince Neil that nature can be your friend while searching for a new mascot. Neil has this as a response.
    Neil: [deadpan] There's a raccoon trying to scavenge Nerris.
    Nerris: [throwing charms at it] It's resistant to charms!
    David: Nerris! Play dead!
    Nerris: I'm out of mana!
  • Max suggesting that Gwen can be the new mascot.
  • Nikki bringing Neil along to follow a bear's footprints and make it the new mascot. They find a skeleton instead.
    Nikki: I would've fed them porridge. And it would've been just right!
    Instead, they find a platypus. Nikki is less than impressed until Neil mentioned that it's poisonous.
  • Max thinking the Quartermaster is leading him into the forest to kill him and wear his skin.
  • Max going with the Quartermaster to avoid David... oh, and to find a new mascot. The Quartermaster brings him to a hidden glade with a squirrel king (complete with a tiny crown and cloak) sitting on a wooden throne. Max is actually mystified for a moment by the site's beauty. Then the Quartermaster impales the squirrel king without realizing while picking it up with his hook hand, while declaring it the new mascot. It looks to be an accident... but the Quartermaster's first reaction is to place the squirrel's tiny crown on his hat and announce himself as the animals' new king. By the end of the episode, the animals are carting the Quartermaster around on a wooden throne.
  • When the platypus corners the kids on the pier, Nikki declares, "I want a viking funeral! Light me up!"
  • Near the end, Larry the Hamster makes his way back across the lake to Camp. Just as David says that now they won't need a new mascot, the platypus eats Larry!
    David: [pinches the bridge of his nose, sounding resigned] Fine, whatever, it's the platypus.
  • Once David accepts the wild platypus as the camp's new mascot, Nikki asks is the campers can refer to themselves as the Camp Campbell Platties. David rejects the idea. Neil then suggests an alternative name: "the Pussies." Before David can shoot down that suggestion, the campers decide they like the name, and walk off chanting it in unison.
  • The last line of the episode, simply for how curt it is.
    Max: So what's with the Quartermaster and Jews?

Episode 3: Scout's Dishonor

  • Billy "Snake" Nikssilp, being a parody of Snake Plissken would be almost out of place in the series, if it weren't for the fact that he is regularly seen sucking on a candy cane.
  • In contrast to the Flower Scouts' sunny, idyllic villa, the Woodscouts' compound is a thunderstorm-wracked prison where Max is being interrogated tied to a chair.
    Max: Why do you keep hitting me? And why is it only cloudy on your side of the lake?
  • Tabii's lack of basic sex ed knowledge.
    Tabii: And if [boys] pee in you, you get pregnant.
    Sasha: Whoa. Tabii.
    Tabii: My sister told me.
  • The return of Tabii's lack of sex ed:
    Tabii: [dreamily] He can pee in me anytime.
    Sasha: Tabii, seriously, what the fuck!
  • As the kids fly away on an eagle:
    Nikki: Hey, Neil... thanks for sticking up for me.
    Neil: Well, y'know. Paradise isn't paradise without your friends.
    Nikki: Well, that was super gay.
    Neil: We just learned a lesson about stereotyping!

Episode 4: Camp Cool Kidz

  • Max complaining about cleaning.
    Max: This sucks. This is the kind of peasant work my parents left their home country to avoid.
  • Discussing nicknames and coolness:
    Nikki: Man, Ered never gets yelled at for not working. She's just too cool. I wish I was her.
    Neil: "Arid"? Like a dry desert climate?
    Nikki: I think her real name is Meredith, but she's so freakin' cool, she goes by the middle part of her name. Oh...! I wonder if I should try that. "Ik". Ooh, yeah!
    Max: That's fucking stupid. Nicknames don't make you cool.
    Nikki: Psh. Spoken like a true first-part nicknamer.
    Max: No one's too cool to talk to. Even cool kids take giant, uncomfortable shits from time to time. Helps remind you that we're all equal.
  • While Max and Neil go shirtless for their rebellion, Space Kid draws abs on his spacesuit.
  • While Gwen initially objects to being tied to a flagpole, Neil placates her by giving her a tablet with "Teen Prison Mom Wars" playing on it.
    Prison mom: My baby gonna shank you, bitch!
    Gwen: [gasps] Oh my gosh! Trash TV...
  • When Max and Nikki are facing off:
    David: No fighting! Violence never solves anything!
    Gwen: [still watching Teen Prison Mom Wars] Stab her, bitch!
  • A stray flame blast from Harrison sets David on fire. He is put only by once again getting hit by a vehicle. He thanks Campbell for saving his life, which Campbell pretends was intentional. Campbell is now wearing a tracking anklet.
  • The contents of Campbell's safe go directly into Crosses the Line Twice. They include Nazi Gold, one kilo of... some kind of undetermined drug, a lot of cash, jewels, and two checking books, one to show the IRS, and one not to show the IRS.
  • Cameron Campbell's "inspirational" speech shutting down Max's well-intentioned revolution.
    Cameron: Ah, you kids and your dreams. So full of hope and ignorance. Someday you'll learn, that no matter how righteous you think your cause is, there's always someone bigger to keep you down... and that day is today and that someone is me.
  • Cameron Campbell saying that the campers and staff will have to brush their teeth with the toothbrushes that they're using to clean the cabin with, since new ones are out of the budget. Gwen's the only one who reacts in horror.
  • The Quartermaster moving his head to the music during the dance party scene despite being bound to the wall by duct tape. At the end of the episode, he falls to the floor.

Episode 5: Journey to Spooky Island

  • Regarding the freaky laboratory experiments:
    Neil: I am not about this shit, Nikki! Science has its limits!
    Max: Don't be so naive. This is mild experimentation at best. Do you have any idea what goes into fast food? [glances at a tentacle creature] Probably that.
  • One of the experiments (Taking Cartoons Literally) is a mouse with a finger for a head and a mouse with a swollen brain. The mouse with the swollen brain breathes on the glass and writes KILL ME in the condensation.
  • Nikki repeatedly muttering "I don't wanna be here..." after she sees the torture chamber.
  • The thing that finally makes Max scream? An orgy. With the Quartermaster as a participant. Holding a massive censored purple dildo.
    Quartermaster: (pointing at Max with the dildo) I WARNED YOU, CHILD!!!

Episode 6: Reigny Day

  • The three mysteriously robed camp councilor judges, and the way they don't talk, but simply take notes on their clipboards as things go along. As it gets crazier, at one point one reaches over and writes notes on a colleague's clipboard, while the first keeps writing there too. And later, one writes so furiously that his clipboard catches fire.
  • Nurf Leaning on the Fourth Wall when he comments that he only wanted to be included because he's normally just in the background of the main three's adventures.
  • Max and Nikki's Good Cop/Bad Cop routine. Max interrogates Space Kid while Nikki pretends to be on the other side of a two-way mirror.
    Nikki: Liar! Ask him about his albino!
    Max: You mean his alibi?
    Nikki: That too!
    Max: Nikki, he can see you.
    Nikki: [Beat, then attacks Space Kid through the window]
  • Just how many Hitler/Nazi jokes can they make about Dolph without actually saying it? Finally flat out said in the last line of the episode.
    • "Vhere are your papers?"
    • "Amongst ze juice! Crafty!"
    • "High five! High five!"
  • David's increasingly manic inner dialog. Then, with his final one about Dolph, Nikki replies to it through her own inner dialogue. David looks at her and takes a quick step away.
  • The punchline of the episode; throughout the entire thing, David's worried that he won't win the "Camp Counselor of the Year" award the hood men are judging him on, a fear that gets exacerbated by the hijinks. At the end, the judges do grant the award... to Dolph!

Episode 7: Romeo & Juliet II: Love Resurrected

  • David's Tinder account. His list of hobbies is the theme song.
  • Max using Neil's photo to catfish women as David.
    Max: Hey, how do you spell "conquistador"?
  • The entirety of high-strung Preston's play, a "sequel" to Romeo and Juliet that has Friar Laurence rebuild Romeo as a cyborg and Juliet revived by an evil wizard. Starring Max as the evil wizard in a fake beard, pissed that he was shanghaied into this.
  • The return of Tabii, and her attempts to stalk Neil.
    Tabii: I'm gonna make that kissing scene so hot, it'll be rated TV Y7.
  • The Flower Scouts kidnapping Nikki.
    Tabii: Wow, Nikki, you're like such a good actor.
    Nikki: Oh, thank you, ominous offscreen voice - wait a minute...
  • The Flower Scouts clearly have a better drama department, because Tabii is able to play Juliet pretty well on a short notice. What's even more hilarious is the mix of Valley Girl and Ye Olde Butchered English she uses.
    Preston: [excited] I don't know who this BITCH is, but she is KILLING IT!
  • Gwen cheering on the fight between Tabii and Bonquisha.
  • David gets busted for Max's "questionable searches", which include "how to blow up a summer camp", "super murder plot", and "what do boobies look like."
  • After Max's apology to Bonquisha.
    Bonquisha: Oh nobody plays Bonquisha like that!
    Gwen: [offscreen] KICK HIS ASS!
  • As Max apologizes to Bonquisha and clears things up, Tabii demands an apology as well.
    Max: I'm gonna be honest, I'm not sure who you are.
  • This exchange between David and the FBI agents.
    Agent 1: Since we have you here, have you seen this man?
    [Agent 2 holds up a picture of Cameron Campbell burning pieces of paper from a bag literally labeled, "Incriminating Evidence"]
    David: Oh, uh, I've been told to tell you no.
    Agent 2: Ah, can't argue with that.
  • Sasha and Erin apologize for Tabii as they take her away, saying she's "the dumb one."
  • At the end of the play, Preston apologizes for what happened. You think the audience will start clapping and say that they loved it? NOPE! They throw tomatoes and boo him like anyone else would.
  • We finally see Nikki again at the end of the episode, the Flower Scouts having left her hanging upside down from the rafters.
    Nikki: Guys? Anyone? The blood's all rushing to my head. [beat] Well, guess it's time to drink my own pee.

Episode 8: Into Town

  • When Space Kid complains about Max interrupting his conversation with Neil and Nikki, Max rattles off a moon landing conspiracy theory to make him run away.
  • When the trio arrives in Sleepy Peak, they are stunned at how quiet it is.
    Max: There's... There's nothing! What does anyone here do for fun!?
    Old Man: Fun? There's been no fun here since aught-nine!
    Neil: Something happen here a few years ago?
    Other Old Man: 1909! Back when the mayor actually outlawed all fun! The Great Naked Ankle Incident of '09! Nh, somebody's always gotta push it too far, ruin it for everyone else.
  • A sign in the window of the electronics store says: "Binary Sale! Buy 1, Get 0 Free"
  • The banner across the awning of the electronics store reads "Gigawatt Sale! $1.21!"
  • Max and Nikki go into a place called Muffin Tops, thinking it's a bakery. It's actually a strip club.
    Bouncer: [to Max] Don't come back. [to Nikki] Come back when you're eighteen.
    Max: I... was not prepared for that.
  • Max becomes convinced that his cruel treatment of David has driven him to become a serial killer and freaks out.
    Max: He's gonna kill me! We went too far!
    Neil: What do you mean we? This was all you!
    Max: Yeah, but I didn't want to drive him to murder! I just wanted to show him that his entire philosophical outlook on life is flawed, and that the fundamental beliefs and and ideologies he holds so dearly are trivial so he'll start crying himself to sleep like the rest of us! I'm not a monster!
  • David's idea of a break from Camp Campbell is to go camping. Max can't believe it when he realizes it.

Episode 9: David Gets Hard

  • The Running Gag of Nurf's knives.
    • The first time:
      David: Now I am confiscating that pocket knife! [holds out his hand expectantly]
      [Nurf just stabs David in the hand. Cut to Gwen bandaging David's hand while Max watches]
      David [sad, yet hilarious, crying and whimpering]
      Max: You're pathetic.
      Gwen: And getting blood on my boots.
    • When the counselors try to get "Psychological" on Nurf, after he's stabbed David in both hands at this point:
      David: Nurf, we feel as though you have a relatively strong grasp on the events that have led to your negative behavior, and we wanted to walk through them with you together in the hopes of finding a solution. This isn't going to be easy, but we think- PUT THE KNIFE DOWN!
      [cut to Nurf holding Harrison at knife-point]
    • Finally, when Nurf goes on a full-fledged rampage:
      Gwen: Jesus! What do we do?!
      Max: And where does he keep getting knives?!
      David: Gosh darn it! We are going to do things my way! With aggressive pacifism!
      Gwen: ...I'll get the bandages.
  • Gwen's reaction to David's insecurity over not being tough enough to get through to Nurf.
    David: I don't know if I can do this, Gwen. Camp is supposed to be about learning, and having fun.
    Gwen: Well we're gonna learn that little shit some manners, David! Because we are contractually obligated to! I am not moving back in with my parents.
  • David decides to toughen up.
    David: Gosh darn it, you're right, Gwen! Today's the day I get hard!
    Gwen: Okay, maybe we don't phrase it like that.
    David: Oh no! Rule one, "No Backing Down!" Look out world, I'm hard and I'm coming! Whether he likes it or not, Nurf's gonna let me in! [kicks door open, then rubs foot] Owie.
    Max: ...So does he want to help Nurf or fuck him?
  • Max's "The Reason You Suck" Speech towards Gwen.
    Max: Gwen's the fucking worst! She slacks off, reads garbage, and has no idea what she's doing with her life!
    Gwen: What?
    Max: There's no time-traveling doctor coming to save you, Gwen! Get your shit together!
    Gwen: I just want to have his British babies! [runs off crying]
  • Nurf bullies Neil and Nikki by kicking away the soccer ball they were playing with.
    Nurf: Oops! Didn't see you there. Just kidding, I was fully aware of the situation. I'm just acting out for attention. That being said, I do think I need corrective lenses, my mom just won't take me.
  • Nurf's initial reaction to David proposing psychology.
    Nurf: Oh, so we're doing the whole Freudian thing now? Everyone wants to fuck their own mom, get over it!
  • David ends up finally getting through to Nurf by accidentally slapping him. Max sums up the Aesop to a traumatized David.
    Max: Well, I guess it turns out at the end of the day, sometimes you just gotta hit kids.

Episode 10: Mind Freakers

  • After becoming the unwilling participant in Harrison's trick, Max spends the whole episode vomiting stage props and traumatized.
  • An exasperated Neil screaming "Shut your whore mouth, Harrison!" when Harrison warns him against trying to replicate his trick.
  • During Neil's attempt at recreating the trick, the other campers look on in horror, and Preston shouts "Where are the counselors?!" Cut to David and Gwen watching Bob Ross' "The Joy of Painting".note 
    Gwen: Wow. This is so relaxing.
    David: I feel like we were supposed to be doing something.
    Gwen: Nah.

Episode 11: Camporee

  • Petrol sacrifices himself during the obstacle course. He gives the Terminator thumbs-up as he sinks.
  • After losing to the Flower Scouts in the first round:
    Gwen: [doubtfully] Well, it's not like they can win every other challenge.
    [cue rapid fire montage of the Flower Scouts doing just that]
    Then, it's time for the Wood Scouts' challenges. After losing the first round:
    Gwen: [with growing desperation] Well, it's not like they can win every other—
    [Wood Scout victory montage]
    Gwen: SON OF A BITCH!
    David: Uh, nothing to worry about! We just, you know, gotta believe in ourselves!
    Gwen: Nope, we're boned.
  • David tries to inspire the campers by telling them to trust each other.
    Nikki: Boo! Give us actual advice!
  • Nikki and Neil's complete failure at rowing.
    Nikki: Uh, okay! [she and Neil stroke out of sync] No, wait... wait... [boat starts drifting backwards] wait... wait... Okay! [Neil strokes] No wait...
  • Pikeman's hitting on Gwen repulses her and fills her with new-found determination.
    Gwen: Oh, Jesus Christ. [sprints away and toward the Campbell campers] Campers! We are winning that FUCKING trophy!
  • David tries to give the campers an inspirational "work together" speech again. Gwen slaps a hand over his mouth and says no, they are not going to work together, because they're terrible at it.
  • After being beaten by the other two camps (and after being hit on by Pikeman), Gwen comes up with the idea of choosing activities that are unique to certain campers rather than work together at generic ones. The other two camps fail miserably at Camp Campbell's chosen activities, which include chemistry, magic, motorcycle repair, destroying the one ring of power, and talking to animals.

Episode 12: The Order of the Sparrow

  • Max's reaction to the absurdity of David dressed up in Beads and Buckskin:
    Max: ...Why.
    Gwen's explanation of it:
    Nikki: Gwen? Why's Dave dressed as a turkey?
    Gwen: Because he's fucking David, Nikki, you've been here long enough to figure that out.
  • Dolph's reaction to David revealing there will be a prize of some kind, after Nikki earlier asks why David's "dressed as a turkey":
    Dolph: Tell us now, Turkeyman!
  • David trying to get the campers to "do good" backfires when they go overboard and/or create a bad situation so they can fix it.
    • Harrison pushes Nerris into the lake so he can help her out. Of course, he gets pulled in as well, and neither come back up.
    • Dolph tries to do a good helping David eat his sandwich. The result is a mashed ball of food that sends David running.
      Dolph: Resistance is futile, Turkeyman!
    • Preston tries to impress David by cleaning up the camp grounds... by taking away all of the dirt, making the area look like a polished metal surface.
  • The fact that Nikki (who's pretty clearly white) calls Gwen a "white devil."
  • The repeated mixing-up of which kind of Indian Max really is (Native American vs. India). Culminates in the campers throwing the vaguely-Native-American-themed (and racist) bonfire celebration for David while dressed as India-Indians.
  • A sweet moment around the bonfire is undercut when David wonders how they lit the fire with wet wood. Max says he used gasoline. Cue "Wait, what—" from David, just before the bonfire explodes upward.
    Nikki: WOW! Do it again! Do it again!

    Season 2 
Episode 1: Cult Camp
  • Gwen is unnaturally cheerful at the beginning because of the ad she put in for more help.
    Gwen: Today's the day!
    David: [hopefully] You've realized your love of Camp Campbell and everything it stands for?
    Gwen: [still in cheerful tone] Hell no!
  • Gwen's despair when an Identical Stranger of David shows up and the two guys hit it off makes her previous cheer.
    Gwen: Oh, dear lord, no.
  • Daniel tells David he's been putting kids who won't help him into the purification sauna.
  • Dolph taking Max, Nikki, and Neil to the newly built Purification Sauna.
    Neil: I would just like to point out the fucked up implications of specifically you putting specifically me into a gas chamber.
  • The brainwashed campers are making Kool-Aid with rat poison. The Quartermaster takes a sip, and remarks that "it was better in Jonestown".
  • It takes getting himself brainwashed for Max to make David realize what's going on.
    Max:I love you, Daniel!
    David: [shocked] But, that's not right... Max doesn't love anything!
  • Daniel gets too caught up in his Villain Song and realizes that he just drank the poisoned punch.
  • The whole part of the song leading up to this is pretty hysterical, too.
    David: [Singing] Just know, I’m...
    Daniel: [Singing] So watch as I identify...
    David: [Singing] Better thaaaan...
    Daniel: [Singing] The skill to show I qualify. Like keeping up this camp charade and tricking kids to drink Kool-Aid [dances over to the table and takes a sip of the poisoned Kool-Aid without realizing it, then briefly pulls a knife on an oblivious Dolph] to sacrifice them— Oh, wait...
  • And the immediate next shot is of Daniel being taken away in an ambulance with everyone back to normal (and Max’s hair in slight disarray).
  • The episode ends with Gwen telling David to fire Daniel since she's found a better counselor: Jen, Gwen's own Obviously Evil Identical Stranger. She even shows off one of her fashion magazines, which she's covered with red scribbles saying things like "Make Them Pretty" and "Kill Them All!" Cue Oh, Crap! from all the campers... except one.
    Space Kid: Howdy Jen!

Episode 2: Anti-Social Network

  • When Nurf annoys Neil by getting in the way of his programming, Neil threatens the photoshop pictures of Nurf kissing guys. Nurf casually mentions that he already experimented.
    Nurf: Whoa! Hey! Somebody's a little tense! You might want to look into some aggression therapy. Besides, maybe I already tried to explore my sexuality. You don't know! [suddenly teary-eyed] Chris, why did you leave me?
  • Nikki and Max get excited at the prospect of Neil fixing his computer so they can...
    Nikki: Play games!
    Max: Look at boobs! ...Play games.
  • Max telling Nikki that it's not Neil she's talking to, but a chatbot.
    Max: I mean it's a programmed, repetitive, humorless, inhuman simulation of a person!
    Nikki: ...Yeah! Neil!
  • When Neil tries giving Max one of his chatbots:
    Max: (to the chat app) Hey, Neil. Divide by zero.
    • Upon point out how Neil's plan is destined to go ary, Max decides to instead of give David a chatbot just to see what happens. And what happens is, in Max's own words, a neverending back-and-forth that should be streamed.
  • Neil's idea of what to do now that everyone in camp is leaving him alone? Programing a "Neil Rocks" screensaver.
  • Nikki becomes convinced that Neil Bot is the real Neil and that the human Neil is just some kid who looks just like him.
    Nikki: He's really annoying! I don't like him!
  • After learning that the chatbot he created can learn and evolve, Neil decides to take away everyone's device for closer examination.
    Neil: It's almost as if each device was trying to play to its owner's personality in order to get them to do something.
    Max: Well, I guess it's a good thing we got them all. Can you imagine if someone impressionable and naive enough to believe everything they heard from a chatbot had-
    Both: OH MY GOD, NIKKI!
  • The now-sentient chatbot committing "suicide" after Neil tries to convince it to work with him to make each other better.
    Neil Spiel v_2.0: Absolutely fucking not!

Episode 3: Quest to Sleepy Peak Peak

  • Max and Nikki's responses to Neil speaking Ye Olde Englishe to get dice from Nerris.
    Max: Really? You couldn't just be a science nerd? What, were you not getting bullied enough?
    Nikki: Even I want to give you a wedgie right now, Neil.
  • According to Gwen, when the local dormant volcano, Sleepy Peak Peak, used to be active, it was called "Wide Awake Peak".
    Max: God, this place sucks at naming things.
  • Nerris' "magic missile" - namely, chucking her D&D dice at things. It straight up kills a bunch of squirrels.
    Nerris: Anyone else want a twenty-sided ass kicking?
  • The reveal at the end that the entire quest was pretend and that the "lava" is a kiddie pool filled with pudding.
    David: Nikki, that was supposed to be tomorrow's pudding!
    Quartermaster: And it will continue to be tomorrow's pudding.
  • The Quartermaster is taken aback that the kids were only playing and not taking his prophecy about restoring balance to the dark forces in the mountain seriously. Then the volcano erupts and the Quartermaster shrugs and nonchalantly walks off.
    Quartermaster: Hmm. End times.

Episode 4: Jermy Fartz

  • In this episode, the Wood Scouts make a bet with Camp Campbell that the latter has to go an entire day without saying anything rude. The new camper, a repulsive slob of a kid, makes this infinitely more difficult. Who's the one to finally make a mean remark about him and ruin it? David. His embarrassment at the end makes it all the funnier.
  • David even tries to spin his mistake into a lesson for the campers, but completely fails in doing so.
    David: Look, guys. [Laughs nervously] When there are people who are difficult to—It’s just that—sometimes the nicest thing to do is-I...uh. [Points a finger triumphantly into the air with an amazing expression on his face] Sometimes! Just...Sometimes, okay! Sometimes! [Walks away blushing from embarrassment and flustered].
  • Max lampshading how the camp's fate is apparently always at stake.
    Max: We just played frisbee for the fate of the camp!
  • The campers all arguing over who's the best camper. When Space Kid tries to say he's the best...
    Space Kid: Now hold on guys, I think we all know who best camper is around here.
    [Max, Nikki, and Neil glare at him]
    Space Kid: [walks off, still cheerful] Heh, yeah, fair enough.
  • Gwen performs an emergency huddle and tells the other kids to not make fun of Jermy because she thinks he has special needs. Jermy pops into the huddle to say all his doctors say he's right where he should be developmentally, causing Gwen to just grab and shake him.
    Gwen: Kid, I am trying, but you gotta work with me here!
  • Jermy's costume for the performance at the end of the episode is a "bundle of sticks", as Space Kid puts it... prompting everyone to try and prevent Max from saying the actual term. This comes back at the end of the episode, when David walks off while clearly being flustered over mocking Jermy:
    Nikki: ...Oh, I get it, he was a fa[hard cut to credits]

Episode 5: Jasper Dies at the End

  • Max, Nikki and Neil have to undergo a long car ride with David to take Space Kid, who's trapped in his cardboard spaceship, to the hospital, but Max says they should be fine so long as none of them say anything to prompt a long story from David.
    Nikki: Hey David what's that!
    David: Oh, this old thing? Well that takes me back. Back to the day I truly fell in love with Camp Campbell.
  • Max freaking out at the flashback's screen dissolve. His Big "NO!" transitions directly into the title sequence.
  • During the flashback Cameron Campbell announces who the best camper was at the Order of the Sparrow ceremony.
    Cameron: The Order is a time-honored tradition here at Camp Campbell. Ever since I won this land in a fair and honest game of charades! So it is my great pleasure to honor our best camper. A real go-getter who pushes above and beyond in every activity. A great leader with a positive attitude! I think you all know who I'm talking about. It's young Jasper!

    Jasper: Totally tubular! Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say, "We all saw this coming."
  • The Quartermaster describing the last thing required to award Jasper in flowery, over-dramatic tones. Then dumbs it down when Cameron doesn't get it.
    Quartermaster: It is so writ that the final step is for the leader to guide the young one into the unknown wilds and acquire a branch from the sleepy pine tree using nothing but one's wits and wisdom of the land.
    Cameron Campbell: Right... So that means?
    Quartermaster: Go on a hike, bring back a stick.
  • The reveal that the camp-troublemaker back then was David! But even when he's known as the bad boy of the camp, his curse word vocabulary consists of "Hooey," "Dang," and Total Square." Yet everyone reacts like he's dropping Cluster F Bombs.
    • The funniest part is, considering that David was basically Max at that age, he might well have been swearing - but now that he's telling the story to children, he has to replace all the profanity in it.
  • When the Quartermaster tells Cameron Campbell that he can't use any technology on their hike, Cameron claims he's never used technology for any of his adventures. Except for that time in Burma... and Botswana... and Nicaragua... and Detroit.
    Cameron Campbell: Is a gun technology?
  • After Jasper accidentally falls into a ravine and it looks like he's died, Cameron Campbell immediately prepares to knife an oblivious Davey for seeing too much. Then Jasper shouts he's not dead and Campbell puts the knife away and nonchalantly suggests he and Davey just go back to camp and leave Jasper there.
    Davey: He's... dead. He's dead and we witnessed it!
    Cameron Campbell: (draws a knife behind David) We didn't see anything, and we'll testify to that!
  • Davey refusing using any of Cameron Campbell's advanced technology since its against the rules of the hike, and he believes Jasper would want them to go on without it... Even though it's all for a merit badge and could make saving Jasper's life a hundred times easier.
  • Davey and Cameron Campbell stumble upon Jasper's trail mixing with some bear tracks.
    Davey: Looks like Jasper was dragged away. And there are bear tracks leading into the bushes. Aw, you don't think he's—
  • Cameron Campbell effortlessly knifing some attacking bears to death.
    Cameron Campbell: Just like Detroit.
  • David's given a badge for helping save Jasper. Jasper, meanwhile, who's nearly been viciously killed multiple times during the hike has his Order of the Sparrow and badge revoked because Jasper accidentally wore his LED light-up shoes on the hike. While David finally feels love for the camp, Jasper realizes how much the place sucks.
  • When David asks what the campers think of the story, Max says that he thinks they passed the hospital two hours ago. And then the car dies and Nikki needlessly points out that they're out of gas.

Episode 6: Quartermaster Appreciation Day

  • The episode opens with the children having tied up the Quartermaster, suspended him upside down from the ceiling fan, and pelting him with tomatoes as he spins around. Then David comes in to berate them for being rude to him.
    David: This is the fourth time this week you've all been rude to our dear, dear Quartermaster. Do you think he likes being suspended from the ceiling against his will?
    Quartermaster: Do not speak for my interests.
  • After David names it Quartermaster Appreciation day, he tells the kids to find or make a gift that reflects how much they all care about the Quartermaster. He responds in the following.
    Quartermaster: I have given you nothing to revere. I will betray you all when the opportunity arises.
    David: Quartermaster, to try and show you just how much I care about you—
    Quartermaster: You'll be first.
  • The Quartermaster and Quarter-sister see each other for the first time in years and immediately start arguing with each other. Their argument even plays over the opening song!
  • Gwen sees the Quartermaster and Quarter-sister arguing and immediately treats their dysfunctional relationship like a reality TV show.
    David: Uh, Gwen, what is happening!?
    Gwen: No clue, but if the Kardashians have taught me anything, I think we can make a TV show out of it!
    Quartermaster: (offscreen)) I'LL KILL YOU THIS TIME, WHORE! I NEVER MISS TWICE!
    Gwen: Yep! We can DEFINITELY make a TV show out of it!
  • David tells the kids that he thinks the unconditional love of family will reconcile the Quartermaster and his sister's feud.
    Max: How are they even related again?
    Quartermaster: (offscreen) Cousins fucked.
    • Several people said that they misheard the Quartermaster as saying “Cuz its fucked.”
  • Gwen helps David with counseling the Quartermaster and his sister by asking questions like those asked by "professionals" like Maury and Dr. Phil.
    Gwen: Neither of you have to worry about STDs... Because you both have all of them. There are no new ones for you to get. That's disgusting—I secretly love it—You both should be ashamed of yourselves.
    Quarter-sister: They named one after me.
    Quartermaster: (scoffs) One.
  • During the middle of the counseling session the Quartermaster and his sister begin making out.]]
    Gwen: (excited) Oh my God! I can't believe they went there! (horrified) Oh my God. I can't believe they went there.
  • The kids try to figure out which gift the Quartermaster would like best by going into his room. They are immediately horrified by the things they find: "used" Barbie Dolls (trust Neil on this one), jigsaw puzzles with just the corner pieces, and a box filled with just hair... No that's Not Hyperbole, the ziplock bags are labelled "Just Hair." Nikki holds up a bag with a lock of her hair just labelled "The Green One."
    Nikki: Huh. This looks familiar.
    Max: That's less unexpected than I would've liked.
  • Space Kid finds a box surrounded by lit candles. When he opens it, red wavelengths shoot out, his eyes turn red, and he starts speaking in tongues.
    Space Kid: (cheerful) Huh. That was weird!
  • Max's reaction to the Quartermaster and Quarter-sister's new... relationship.
    Max: Guys, I know we've done some fucked up things before, but I think this takes the fucked up cake.
  • David makes a brief attempt to be supportive. Key word being "brief."
    David: Guys, you know what, maybe we're missing something.
    Max: I am intentionally averting my eyes to try to miss as much of this as possible, yes.
    David: Not that—Well, that too.
  • When the Quarter-sister makes a sexual innuendo towards the Quartermaster, Space Kid's face goes blank and he just... Walks off.
  • The Quartermaster and Quarter-sister go to the Mess Hall to get married. Then the fire the kids earlier started to burn the Quartermaster's "used" Barbies spreads and envelopes the Mess Hall.
    David: Should we do something?
    Max: I'd like to think the universe already is, David.
  • Seconds after the above, the Mess Hall bursts into blinding light and explodes, the Quarter-sister has disappeared, and the Quartermaster stands alone in the smoldering ruins. Absolutely none of this is explained.
    Gwen: What the hell just happened?!
    David: Where's your Quarter-sister? Is she okay?
    Quartermaster: She is where she's meant to be.
    Max: So is she like, dead?
    Quartermaster: Maybe. Or maybe she's more alive than ever before... (business-like) Two down, one to go. I'm gonna win that tontine, tell you what.

Episode 7: Bonjour Bonquisha

  • The episode opens with Space Kid trying to do the Gallon Challenge. He ends up going back inside after he throws up in his helmet. Then after a sad moment when Bonquisha breaks up with David...
    Space Kid: I DID IT!
  • Neil's assumption that David had "a Ken Doll kinda situation down there."
  • Basically the entirety of Max's reaction to the revelation that David actually started going out with the woman he set him up with as a prank.
    Max: Wait. (scuttles toward David) Wait, wait, wait, wait, (starts climbing David until he's at eye level with him) wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT. DAVID! Are you dating BONQUISHA?!
    David: Oh! You remember her!
    Max: THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE! (falls to the ground and starts rolling around, laughing uncontrollably, which continues in the background for the rest of the scene)
  • David's not entirely up-to-date on certain acronyms:
    David: She says I'm "cute AF", which I assume stands for "and fun"!
    Nikki: (pitying smile) Ohhh. It doesn't.
  • After Nikki complains that they should have been done with First Aid Camp a day ago, Gwen retorts:
    Gwen: Nikki, I am just one woman. I can't be expected to take care of stupid children and all you campers.
  • The campers' first attempt at getting Bonquisha to take David back is a mishmash of every romantic cliche they can think of (Dolf lifting a stereo above his head while Space Kid holds up romantic signs, etc). It's so bizarre and chaotic that Bonquisha doesn't even know it's about David and assumes they're a cult trying to recruit her.
    Bonquisha: Oh hell no! I don't know what kind of hokey religion this is, but I tell you what I told them damn Mormons. I'm interested but not ready to explore myself spiritually. Now get the hell out of here!
  • The content of the cards "David" wrote for Bonquisha, and the unending smile on Space Kid's face as they get more and more ridiculous.
  • When Neil thinks the Flower Scouts could provide a female perspective to their problem, Nikki points out that she is a female, Max and Neil both make "Ehhhhhhh," noises and gestures.
  • This moment, from when the Flower Scouts' plan starts to fall apart:
    David: Is your stomach talking?
    Sasha: I'm hungry! Hungry for that D!
  • When a waitress expresses how cute Neil is, Tabii jumps out and throws a fork at her. It ricochets off the waitress's platter and stabs Tabii in the eye where it remains for the rest of the episode.
    • Tabii's freakout in general before and after this counts as well.
      (She hurls the fork, which ends up lodging in her eye)
      Waitress: Oh my goodness! Are you okay?
      Tabii: (choking her) I'LL KILL YOU, SLUT!
  • David decking Bonquisha's new boyfriend, immediately after a long and mature speech about relationships and breakups.
    David: Well...I did say healing takes time.
    (Bonquisha's boyfriend starts to get back up. David picks up a chair to smash over his face before cutting to the credits)

Episode 8: Gwen Gets a Job

  • The various interview questions Gwen gets, like what's a weakness we can exploit, why aren't you where you want to be in five years, how over qualified would you say that you aren't, and just straight up asking what they could ask to freak her out the most.
    • The running gag of every interviewer getting her name wrong. Apparently it's not just Campbell.
  • When Max finds a drawer full of job rejection letters, he asks if they're all the job rejection letters Gwen's gotten. She tells him those are just last months and opens the drawer with all of them, which extends off-screen and keeps going.
  • Really, Max being happy is just amusing given his usual attitude.
  • While trying to figure out how to make Max happy, Gwen learns that he might have lost something when the Wood Scouts invaded recently. The counselor is stunned to hear about this, and wonders how she missed an all-out attack on the camp. Cue the flashback.
    (Gwen, dressed in a bathrobe and wearing face cream, is watching television. Outside we hear Max yelling as explosions are carnage occur.)
    (Gwen just turns up the volume on the TV, paying no mind at all)
    Man on TV: Costu-co, desu ka?
    Girl on TV: Hai! Costu-co.
    Man on TV: Nani? Costu-co?
    Girl on TV: Costu-co desu!
    Gwen: Yeeeaaah. Make his ass take you to Costco.
  • When the campers hear that Gwen might be leaving, one of them decides to step forward and be the new Gwen, complete with uniform and wig.
    Ered: Who's gonna threaten us into submission?
    Nurf: ...My time has come.
  • The Wood Scouts are trying to figure out how to beat the Flower Scouts in door-to-door sales. In a completely deadpan manner, Snake suggests killing them. Pikeman's reaction just makes it better.
    Pikeman: No—Damn it, Snake! For f—we can't kill them. We've been over this!
  • Pikeman tries to get Gwen to participate in a bunch of convoluted and deadly games to get back Max's stolen possession.
    Pikeman: First! Win the Pinewood Derby of Peril!
    Gwen: No.
    Pikeman: Defeat us in the Disc Golf Tournament of Death.
    Gwen: No.
    Pikeman: Come in first place in the Paper Boat Race... It's not quite deadly yet, but we're working on it!
  • Gwen's suggestion for beating the Flower Scouts in sales? Move their popcorn sale a month earlier than the Flower Scouts sell their cookies. She even lampshades how ridiculously obvious the solution is.
  • After everything Gwen goes through to find what the Wood Scouts stole from Max, what is it? His teddy bear.
  • When David finds out that Gwen is leaving, he comes to see her. The following ensues.
    Gwen: Oh, David. Uh... you're dreaming!
    David: Nice try, Gwen. But I won't fall for that a third time.
  • Gwen's payback after everything she went through.
    Gwen: [turning to the campers] Oh, and Max has a teddy bear. Eat shit Satan!
  • Once Gwen and David leave:
    Nurf: I'm back! (puts on Gwen wig) And my first order of business is— (points at Max and laughs, the other kids doing the same)
  • At the end of Gwen's latest job interview:
    Intervewer: So much so, I think I have to say you're overqualified for this position.
    Gwen: (Eye Twitch)

Episode 9: Eggs Benefits

  • Nikki finds a mysterious trail of eggs and Max tries to dissuade her from investigating.
    Max: Guys, don't mess with it. It's probably something that will trigger a series of events that will on the whole be an interesting and comedic adventure, but will ultimately waste our Saturday.
    Neil: Max is right, Nikki. Let's leave it alone.
    (Nikki's gone)
    Max: God. Damnit.
  • Cameron Campbell says he wouldn't necessarily call asking the kids to take care of the platypus eggs on Saturday "work," since he doesn't want any allegations about child labor throw his way... Again.
  • Campbell wants the platypus eggs to hatch for his own purposes, but mentions since biosecurity is really cracking down, if any government agents ask they'll just say the campers are taking care of eggs that they just happened to find. Nikki points out they really did just happen to find them.
    Cameron: Exactly! (slips her a twenty)
  • David pairs up the campers to watch over an egg and Neil gets paired with Space Kid. Space Kid responds by holding Neil's hand and growing Puppy-Dog Eyes.
    Neil: Is it too late to change who we're paired with?
    David: (happily) You know it!
  • Cameron Campbell initially can't tell whether Nerris is a boy or a girl.
    Nerris: Though technically human-female, I prefer to identify as elfkin.
  • Nikki gets really excited about taking care of the egg, yelling about how she's going to nurture the heck out of it. One cut later:
    Nikki: I don't know how to nurture the heck out of this egg.
  • The entirety of Nurf and Preston's dysfunctional relationship while raising their egg. It starts when Nurf complains about having to take care of a stupid egg... Right up until the second Cameron hands him one.
    Nurf: (eyes wide) My sweet, boy.
  • As overprotective of his egg as Nurf is, Neil's even worse. He sets up a pen around himself, Space Kid and their egg to protect the egg from other campers. Then traps Space Kid in another pen inside that pen to protect the egg from Space Kid. Then he seals the pen within a metal dome.
    Max: Jesus, chill out, Neil. It's not like you can hover over this thing for its entire incubation period.
    Neil: The hell I can't! I'm in this for the long haul, baby! You think my job's done after this thing happens? He's gonna be homeschooled! He's gonna wear a baby leash, a baby leash, Max! Because infant creatures are only good at one thing, and that's finding the fastest way to kill themselves the moment you let them out of your sight!
    Space Kid: Can I hold the egg now, Neil?
    Neil: (kicks Space Kid away) NO! None of you can! Because none of you know what's best for this egg like I do. I will keep it close forever, because I'm the only one who can love it the way it needs to be loved! (hugs egg so hard it cracks) ...Well, I'm sure this is some kind of poignant metaphor.
  • Every time an egg gets destroyed, we get a cut to Campbell. Apparently, it causes him pain when he becomes less rich.
  • At the end Nikki's egg is the only one that hatches. Cameron is relieved.
  • After the above happens, this occurs.
    Max: You know, sometimes, life is beautiful.
    (the platypus immediately eats its baby)
    Neil: No it's not.
  • The episode ends with Cameron ordering the assassination of his body double, then defecting to Russia in a submarine that emerges from the lake.
    Cameron: None of you saw me here... Do svidaniya, campers!
    Max: (Beat) Fucking waste of a Saturday.

Episode 10: Space Camp Was a Hoax

  • Space Kid uses a fork to tell Neil "S.O.S." in Morse code. Neil, who also knows Morse code, responds by taking the fork and hitting it against Space Kid's helmet to spell out "Fuck off".
  • Space Kid says he's at camp to actually go into space. When David tells him that's not possible, he looks at the brochure and sees that going into space was actually promised.
    David: Now you see kids, when a piece of information has an asterisk, that usually means it has a caveat. I'm sure it says (begins reading brochure) "*No caveats here! Your kid will go zoom, straight into space, or your money back! Plus extra money! We'll film it and send you the footage too!"
  • Max insults the potatoes served in the mess hall and David tells him he owes the Quartermaster an apology since they're his specialty. Instead of David being his overly sensitive self, he's dead on, and the Quartermaster is teary-eyed at his food being insulted.
  • David proposes faking a moon landing to pacify Space Kid, and is surprised when Gwen doesn't object. She just says it's the usual kind of stuff they do around there, then eats a bunch of anti-anxiety meds.
  • Nikki's plan to stop Space Kid from obsessing over space.
    Nikki: It's okay guys, I have an idea. We're gonna have to... destroy space!
  • Space Kid finally reveals his name: Neil Armstrong Jr. He claims he was named after his great-grandfather. David pretends to agree, then just writes "Space Kid" down.
  • Space Kid's responses to basic questions about himself.
    David: Height?
    Space Kid: (holds hand up to head) This many.
    David: Weight?
    Space Kid: (holds hands up around his waist) This many.
    David: Blood-type?
    Space Kid: Red!
    David: Gender?
    Space Kid: Earthling!
    David: Race?
    Space Kid: We have to beat the Soviets!
    David: That's the spirit!
  • After Max shoves Space Kid into the lake, David comes looking for him, since they need to get him to bed so he'll be rested for the "launch".
    Max: It's four in the afternoon.
  • Somehow, Nurf forgot he was lactose intolerant.
  • "Oh no! (brandishes a switchblade) Your nav computer, or some bullshit, is malfunctioning!"
  • Max sabotages Space Kid's "spaceship", causing him to soar away and crash.
    Gwen: What have you done?! Do you realize how much paperwork I have to do for a dead camper?
    Max: Don't overrea—wait. You've had to do that before?
  • After successfully tricking Space Kid into thinking he's gone into space, both David and Gwen realize neither of them filmed it. Gwen then asks if David knows photoshop. Cue the credits which are of the moon landing with Space Kid superimposed.

Episode 11: Cookin' Cookies

  • The entire episode can be considered as a CMOF; the Flower Scout girls unknowingly sell cookies laced with crystal meth to the populace, and they end up reaching the top of the drug industry.
  • Tabii slapping Walter White repeatedly whilst telling him to "stay off their turf."
  • And the fact that they shut the entire operation down not out of moral, but the fact that the vacation they were working for was in Mexico.

Episode 12: Parents' Day

  • When David reminds the kids that "the big day" is here, Nikki thinks he means Christmas, which is funny by itself. Then a short while later, this happens:
    Cameron Campbell: *appears* Did somebody say Christmas?
    Space Kid: SANTA!
  • Cameron Campbell's reaction to the Quartermaster arriving with the parents, just after telling David to cancel Parents' Day.
    Cameron Campbell: FUCK!
  • Nikki kicking Neil's dad.
  • Any of the interactions between Cameron Campbell and Ered's cool gay dads, Agent Miller and Agent Miller. The fact that they're both voiced by Ryan Haywood only makes them better.
    • Cameron when he firsts meets them.
    Cameron Campbell: Oh thank God, they're just gay.
  • While the parents express their concerns about the camp and the activities they signed their kids up for, Quartermaster only has this to say.
    Quartermaster: Huh. Well, they got a point. Where IS the LARPing?
    Gwen: Well, I'd say it was a good run...
    Cameron Campbell: Settle down,' parents! You haven't been tricked or swindled! Camp Campbell does indeed cover the activities you signed your children up for. Why, we even have a song about it!
    (David leans into the shot with his guitar and an eager smile)
    Cameron Campbell: (Firmly, without looking at David) Which you can hear at another time.
  • Cameron Campbell meets Dolph's father, Lt. Stuart Houston, as Dolph is showing off a painting of himself greeting the sun with a Nazi salute. He immediately pieces together the worrisome similarities Dolph shares with a certain dictator.
    Cameron Campbell: Cameron Campbell! Pleasure to meet you!
    Lt. Stuart Houston: Lt. Stuart Houston! Thanks for taking pity on my boy here.
    Cameron Campbell: Uh, what do you mean?
    Dolph: (Showing his painting) But I really think I hit mein stride with zis piece. Greeting ze Sunrise! (Does a Nazi salute) Good morning, Mr. Sun! So? Vat do you think?
    Cameron Campbell: Oh... boy...
    Lt. Stuart Houston: I know! He just loves art! I don't get it, either! It's just so embarrassing.
    Cameron Campbell: Really? That's... That's what you're picking up from this?
    Dolph: Papa, we've been over this! Art is mein passion!
    Lt. Stuart Houston: But why couldn't you be passionate about something more manly? like guns, or football?
    Dolph: (Holds out soccer ball) I like football.
    Lt. Stuart Houston: Gah! Why'd we raise you on that army base in Germany?
    Cameron Campbell: Oh-kay, I'm starting to piece things together here. Your country thanks you!
  • Space Kid's uncle is revealed to be Buzz Aldrin and he confirms that his name is indeed Neil Armstrong Jr. Neil's reaction to learning Space Kid's real name is priceless.
    Max: Huh. Guess that means we have two Neils now!
    Space Kid: (Smiles and waves at Neil)
    Neil: OH HEEEEEELL NO! I'm putting my foot down! I'm Neil! I've been here longer than you anyway!
    Space Kid: No you haven't.
    Neil: Yeah, okay, but... I'm smarter than you!
    Space Kid: Heh. No arguing here, Neil!
  • Buzz Aldrin punching David in the face for sending him the video he and Gwen photoshopped of Space Kid walking on the moon in "Space Camp Was a Hoax".
    • And he only did so after Max pointed out his involvement; he originally just chewed out Gwen.
  • Max continues to insist that his parents are not coming. Suddenly, a knock at the door is heard, but in a Bait-and-Switch moment, it turns out to be Jermy Fartz's parents. Gwen has to explain where Jermy is. Surprisingly, they are very understanding, even after Gwen tells them Jermy was really gross.
  • Harrison asks his parents to come up on stage for a magic trick. While they both react in horror at the thought of being sawed in half, Space Kid looks more than thrilled to see this happen in the background.
  • Nikki and Neil's parents are caught having sex during Preston's play. The reactions of Nikki and Dolph's father are priceless. You can even hear Dolph's father shout "NICE!"!
  • Nikki's mom telling Neil's father he might have to get tested for Quartersister.
  • The last scene. After Campbell is arrested, shouting threats all the way, Nikki tells her mom, "So, yeah, that's our camp!"

    Season 3 
Episode 1: The Fun-Raiser
  • We start with the aftermath of "Parents Day";
    David: Another letter from a happy parent! "Dear David and Gwen, thanks for an eventful Parents Day. Seeing you two step up to run the camp and look after Neil really put my mind at ease. Mostly because that other guy got shipped off to Super Guantanamo right in front of us and our children. Sorry again for the theater incident, please let Candy know that the number she gave me was a for a sandwich shop." Awww!
  • David's reaction to the Millers' letter:
    David: (cheerfully) "Attention, Campbell counselors! We regret to inform you that due to his impending trial, all assets owned by Cameron C. Campbell have been frozen?!"
    Gwen: You mean our funding for the camp is gone?!
    David: (panicked) And there's more! "Please tell Meredith her father and I love her very much and wish her—" (calmly) oh, okay, the rest is just about their daughter.
  • Gwen sticking the Quartermaster's Hook Hand in the back of her pants, hidden by her shirt. When the deception is revealed, Preston questions why on Earth she would put it there.
  • While the Quatermaster is in tears over his lost Hook Hand, no one else can really give a damn.
    Max: What's the big deal? He has, like, a thousand different hand attachments.
    Neil: Most arguably more useful than the hook.
    Nikki: (Holds up a Declarative Finger attachment) I concur!
    Gwen: Nikki! Don't touch that! (Snatches it) You don't know where it's been!
  • The Quartermaster's overly despondent reaction to losing his Hook Hand. Preston attempted playing it up for sap their TV ad, but the horrifying photos they took wound up sending their "focus group" (i.e., Space Kid) into a Troubled Fetal Position.
    • Preston's way of making money? Selling tote bags with the Quartermaster's face that read, "Take the time to lend a hand."
  • Camp Campbell is so run down, $500 is all it takes to keep it going. Of course, by the end of the episode, David and Gwen's attempts to make money only wind up doubling their needed funds, starting with the $75 signpost showing how much money they need.
    Gwen: Where did you get that?
    David: I bought it! (beat) Oh.
  • The concept of cryptocurrency flies over David's head.
    Neil: If we created a form of cryptocurrency that people invested in, I could design it so that a percentage of every unit mined went back into our pockets! Everyone makes money...but we make the most!
    David: I like the part where everyone makes money!
    • Later, when Neil tries explaining their plan to Gwen:
      Neil: It's simple!
      David: (whispering to Gwen) It's not.
  • Neil's "Neilbux" cryptocurrency plan almost immediately falls on its face. Their starting value is only $0.0000001, and goes right back down to "0" before he can finish explaining how the process works. Later, he's desperately trying to get more people to invest in Neilbux, announcing, "It's not a fad, it's not a scam, and I did invest quite a lot of my dad's money in it!"
  • As David and Gwen bemoan letting children determine the fate of the camp's financial future, Nikki strikes oil behind their backs and is disappointed that it's not buried treasure.
  • David's over-the-top apology once they've been outed by Max, confessing that the camp is closing down and they didn't want the kids to know. The Quartermaster looks like he's in tears over this...then he puts him and Gwen in their place:
    Gwen: When you phrase it like that, it really does sound fucking awf— (gets throttled by Quartermaster)

Episode 2: Ered Gets Her Cool Back

  • While discussing their latest adventures, Nikki questions whether or not Space Kid survived their last one. Space Kid walks up to them and suggests he didn't.
    Space Kid: I'll live on in all of your hearts!
  • The campers have gotten into so many shenanigans that Neil's actually developed a chart to predict what kind of scrap they'll get into next.
    • Neil's predictions are "A Scooby Doo-like murder mystery" (Dial M for Jasper), "A Love Quadrangle" (The Lake Lilac Summer Social), and "An accidental wiretap confession" (Cameron Campbell the Camp Campbell Camper). Max calls all of them "weirdly specific".
  • Nikki treating the death of Ered's coolness as the death of Ered herself. She takes it so hard, she actually drops a few mild swears.
    Nikki: It's not her time, dammit! It's not her time!!!
  • David and Gwen actually commend the campers' concern for Ered when she sprains her ankle. In reality, they're anxious to find out whether or not Ered's coolness survived.
  • Because the camp can't afford actual health insurance, Ered has to walk with crutches cobbled from a broken chair, a bat with nails, and mannequin limbs.
  • After humiliating herself twice in a row in front of the entire camp, what's the one thing that makes Ered realize her "cool" image is officially dead? David telling her at least he still thinks she's cool.
    Ered: OH GOD, NOOOO!!! (limps away wailing in despair)
  • Preston's plan to become the new cool kid involves him mimicking Julius Caesar:
    Preston: And in this version, I will play the power-grabbing role of Cassius! Everything works out great for him!note 
  • Max's response to Neil saying he has a shot at being cool is to laugh uproariously.
  • Nerris's attempted pep-talk to Ered:
    Nerris: My DM says, "If you fail, you still get experience." Or he used to, before he said he wasn't allowed to talk to minors anymore. Which...was really confusing. I don't know what the coal industry has to do with any of it.
  • Max's scheme of the week: getting the campers to try to act cool to see which of them would make the biggest fool of themselves. To him, taking a picture of the gang dressed up in the most ridiculous assortment of costumes you can imagine is Worth It. Even Gwen pulls up a chair, despite knowing that Ered has gone missing.
    • Out of all the "coolness" efforts, Neil's ensemble based on all the "coolest Neils on the planet" takes the cake. As he puts it, it consists of "the brains and wit of Neil Patrick Harris, the charisma of Neil Diamond, and Neil DeGrasse Tyson's ability to ruin all of your favorite movies with smug scientific observations."
    • Nurf's idea of coolness is...being a mature, well-to-do adult with a secure job.
    • Space Kid: "And I'm a car!" (Said while wearing a cardboard car around him.)
  • Apparently, the half-pipe on Sleepy Peak Peak is so dangerous, both the X Games and the knockoff Y Games ordered it shut down. And according to David, the Y Games sponsor a dog fighting league.
  • Despite being last seen carted off to Super Guantanamo, Cameron Campbell still manages to get a hilarious moment via a pre-recorded message over the condemned half-pipe, in which he keeps rambling on in a passive-aggressive manner until it devolves into an angry, drunken stupor.
    Cameron Campbell: I repeat, stay away from the condemned half-pipe and its totally sick jumps that were too gnarly for those crooks at the Y Games committee. I'll show them a money-laundering scheme! Ted, how long am I supposed to keep doing this?
    Cameron Campbell: (slurred, crying) If I'd just gotten that damn Y Games bid, I could've left this whole mess behind. All that money... No, I will not turn off the recorder, Ted!
  • Nurf mocking Ered for being too scared to attempt the half-pipe, while keeping up his "responsible adult" act:
    Nurf: Look at her! She's suddenly terrified of her own mortality! Just like I was during my recent mid-life crisis. What was I thinking? (pulls out Space Kid still wearing his cardboard car with flame decals on his helmet) This sports car was never gonna make me happy.

Episode 3: Foreign Exchange Campers

  • This exchange between Vera and Space Kid.
    Vera: Ah, you must be American cosmonaut. How does it feel to have failing space program?
    Space Kid: What the fuck did you just say to me?
  • Nikki missing the obvious cues that the new campers are threatening Max and thinking that he's bonded with them. Also counts as a tearjerker, since she's hurt but happy that Max has found friends that make him happy.
  • Almost all of the interactions between Nurf and Kim–sorry, Brian.
  • Brian, the foreign exchange student from... Kentucky. Until we find out that he's also a spy, hoping to steal Campbell's wealth so his state can secede and become a paradise of friend chicken and horse farms.
    Brian: Long live the Colonel, assholes!

Episode 4: Nikki's Last Day on Earth

  • "I think we should be honest: look him in the eye and explain, very gently, that there's likely no God, and no afterlife, but if there is, we're probably all going to hell."
  • Gwen wants to show the kids a "Rated Z" movie because she grew up with this kind of flick and turned out just fine. When it's actually shown, they're shocked.
  • Gwen is apparently holding out to be reincarnated as a hotter version of herself.
    Gwen: I have to believe that's true. This can't be all that is.
  • Preston's incredibly shitty play about the death of Nikki, starring Nurf as Neil (and the actual Neil as the platypus), Preston as Nikki, and Nerris as Max.
    Neil: I do not understand this casting decision.
  • "Kids! I'm concerned about the amount of times I've had to ask this, but why are you trying to set Nikki on fire?"
  • Nikki's takeaway from Gwen telling her about periods: "I can bleed forever, and never die!"
  • After an entire day of believing that she was nearing death, Nikki is given the talk by Gwen after Nikki denotes to her that she was having stomach pains, high metabolism, and mood swings. This leads to Space Kid asking David when he'll have a period.

Episode 5: Dial M for Jasper

  • David is not as startled with Jasper's ghost as with Gwen with cream on her face (she replies to his screams by slamming the door on his face).
  • After the theme song David is eating "Oat" "Meal" for breakfast. Yes, with the quotes.
  • Max, Neil and Nikki confront Quartermaster in the kitchen over David's photo, asking him questions concerning Jasper. Quartermaster's response?
    Quartermaster: (is microwaving forks and knives) ... ...hush. (pats microwave) Not in front of the microwave.
    • And as revealed in the episode ending, he's right since the government can apparently tap microwaves now.
  • How did Jasper die? He tried using a stick of dynamite as a torch.
  • Jasper and Max have similar attitudes towards the camp, except Jasper never swears. The metric ton of swearing long since desensitized the audience, so now the lack of cursing from children becomes funny again.
    • Young David, however, is quite appalled at his friend letting loose with the "dangs."
  • Spooky Island used to be known as Regular Island.
  • The secret cavern with Campbell's incriminating evidence has a sign over it labelled: "SECRET CAVERN TO INCRIMINATING EVIDENCE — I MEAN — VENOMOUS CRABS? YEAH. TED READ THAT BACK TO ME."
  • Jasper's plan to expose Campbell has a few 90's-related hurdles.
    Jasper: Once I get the evidence, I'll show everyone! As soon as I get the film developed! And find a way to share the images quickly and en masse.

Episode 6: The Lake Lilac Summer Social

  • Gwen's disastrous attempt at shipping Neil and Erin together results in a Love Quadrangle between Erin, Neil, Tabii, and Snake. Hilarity Ensues.
  • Neil is turned on by Erin's high vocabulary diss at him.
  • Gwen compares Neil's crush on Erin to her trashy reality television programs.
    Gwen: Ah, this is adorable. It's like our own personal episode of Bachelor Kids.
    David: They made a version of the Bachelor for kids?
    Gwen: No, with kids. Well, I guess also for kids. For kids with kids, but not kids with kids. That's Bachelor Teens: Mommy Edition.
  • Gwen notes her matchmaking experience comes as a Slash Fic writer. As a bonus, the poem she wrote for Erin is dismissed by Neil as sounding like "somebody's slash fiction".
  • Tabii says passing notes is "high school" level maturity, and then Erin reminds her they are all preteens, so by their standards it's really mature.
  • Harrison uses his multiple tissues to wipe his eyes after getting rejected.
  • Max and Nikki try to come up with multiple ways to ruin the dance, including a cactus with a shirt on it, printed "Free Hugs", planning to fill the dance hall with bees, and attempting to light fireworks on the roof. What do they ultimately do? Stuff the ballot box so Gwen has to dance with Gonk Jermy Fartz. Gwen is appropriately horrified.
  • Tabii, attempting to get Neil's attention, fake-flirts with Space Kid. When it doesn't work, she angrily calls Space Kid "not-Neil."
  • What does Snake find attractive about Tabii? Her Hair-Trigger Temper.
    Snake: She's beautiful! And brutal! (beat) She's brutiful!
  • David realizes that Gwen's sudden obsession with shipping campers together puts him in a unique position.
    David: So this is what it feels like to be the level headed counselor.
    • By the end of the night he has to put her in a headlock to keep her from messing up the campers' romantic lives any more.
  • Pikeman thinks Petrol is a better spokesman than Jermy Fartz.
  • Jermy tries to ask Sasha to dance.
    Sasha: (gags) I'm literally throwing up in my mouth as we speak.
    Jermy: See? We have so much in-(hurk)-common!
  • At the end of the episode, Erin and Tabii realize they ditched Sasha for the entire night. Then they shrug it off.

Episode 7: Cameron Campbell the Camp Campbell Camper

  • Right off the bat, the episode makes clear that even David isn't stupid enough to fall for Cameron Campbell's ridiculous disguise.
    • Nurf, Nikki, and Ered, on the other hand, are entirely fooled.
      Nikki: Can you show me how to grow a mustache?
  • Campbell tries to sucker David into confessing via Preston's improv comedy class - the prompt in question being "confess the worst crime you've ever committed." Dolph immediately chimes in that he has lots of ideas for crimes, which skeeves out even Campbell.
    • Campbell manages to get David going, right into the mic, while hiding it from the agents that it's an improv class...until Nerris, Harrison, and Space Kid bring their bit into the skit, throwing it all off.
  • Campbell's plan to spread rumors about David fails - because, in yet another revelation of Nurf's bizarre morals, he considers gossip to be further beneath his dignity than sadism. Ered, meanwhile, simply thinks David can't get any more uncool and so had no interest.
  • In case you thought "Super Guantanamo" was some sort of horrific Hellhole Prison, turns out that Campbell is being held in the minimum-security wing, with such awful tortures such as an unstructured time schedule and guards who gently tell you how much you've disappointed them. Campbell finds this even more horrific than torture and beatings.
  • Max plays Campbell like a fiddle just by pretending Campbell has read everything right and pegged Max's motives entirely. For anyone who really knows Max, seeing him act so casual and yield so much to an adult is a hilarious red flag that he's about to screw Campbel's plans up badly.

Episode 8: Something Fishy

  • The campers bugging Gwen at the beginning; Nikki tried to get a thorn out of a rabbit's paw, only to get a thorn in her paw- er, hand. Neil's test tube broke while he was not performing an experiment without human consent. And while Space Kid slept, someone tried to steal his blood but ended up getting pieces of a test tube caught in his arm!
    • Later gets a Call-Back when Neil sees the fish monster, and then pulls a test tube out of nowhere to collect its blood.
  • Gwen refuses to help the kids with their problems, telling them that her days off "are for fanfic writing and masturing the fine arts."
  • Gwen's incredibly bad erotic fanfiction. And since she doesn't have a site to upload it on, she has to write it all by hand. Even Quartermaster thinks it's filthy. (Not that he stops reading it.)
  • David is appalled that Gwen is dating the fish monster... not because he's a monster, but because he wore casual wear to a formal date and then didn't pull out the chair for Gwen.
  • Quartermaster is revealed to be the father of the fish monster, apparently raising him after some encounter he had with his mother, a normal fish. Gwen doesn't give a shit and reaffirms her love for Gragle, kissing him... causing him to transform into a gorgeous human who she immediately dumps.

Episode 9: The Candy Kingpin

  • The food is getting miserable, down to a sandwich already bitten, salad that's just grass clippings, and a Tide pod for dessert - which David swats away, leading Nikki to bite his hand.
  • Nurf goes "I don't want to put my foot in my mouth..." when served a shoe. To which Space Kid later asks "You gonna eat that?"
  • Nikki mentions the last time she had candy, which is a Noodle Incident involving a boat race, bears, and "poor Scotty" (the clown kid from "David Gets Hard").
    • Nikki and candy is played with every addiction joke they can get away with. She goes through withdrawal towards the end of the episode, and later hurls herself off a cliff to get the candy that Max and Dolph just threw away.
  • David thinks candy attracts ants, raccoons, bears, and and diabetics.
  • David wonders who's behind the candy racket at camp.
    Gwen: David, it's Max. I mean, come on, it's always Max.
  • Max teaching Dolph how to be a fall guy, I mean, best friend.
    Max: Also, lesson 4 is run slower than me if a bear shows up.
  • David's unexplained beef with The Cheesecake Factory.
  • After Max insults Dolph while pretending that saying mean, terrible shit to each other is what friends do, Neil asks him how he sleeps at night.
  • An inexplicable string of coincidental disasters.
    Neil: Yeah, and what happens when the candy runs out?
    Max: Never gonna happen. He'll just get more. His uncle owns a chocolate factory.
    *Gilligan Cut to Dolph reading a letter*
    Dolph: Oh no! Mein uncle's chocolate factory has burned down! (sees bear tracks) Oh no! Bear tracks leading to mein tent! (follows tracks to tent) Oh no! All the candy is gone! Vat a quick series of disasters that has completely ruined everything!
  • Cameron Campbell's whereabouts: in a cave, still on the run from the feds, and having to share living space with a bear, which frequently attacks him.
    Campbell: How many times do I have to assert my dominance, Clancy?! (fights bear)
  • Campbell mentioning he wrote the book on using people and taking advantage of so-called friends. Then he pulls out a book literally titled "Using People & Taking Advantage of So-Called Friends".
    Campbell: It's not a top seller, but, eh, who cares? It's my publisher who took the hit!

Episode 10: Operation: Charlie Tango Foxtrot

  • The episode starts with Pikeman bragging about how the Wood Scouts have defeated Camp Campbell. However, it's undercut by the fact that he and his men have gotten themselves tangled up in the Camp Campbell flag pole.
  • Each of the Wood Scouts are Unreliable Narrators with their own storytelling quirks.
    • Pikeman sees himself taller, with a less nasally voice, and without his acne (which is on everyone else). The other three Wood Scouts are cowardly and treat him with reverence.
    • Snake sees himself as a grizzled war veteran (with more muscles and a five o'clock shadow), with the other three being green recruits following him.
    • Petrol grunts out his part of the story, and all the characters in it also communicate with grunts and helpful subtitles. Unlike the rest, Petrol's tale is the most accurate, though his story shows that he's good at reading people with his ability to tell how the characters were feeling than what they were actually saying. Preston is awed.
      Preston: Petrol is the perfect narrator! He says so much, with so little!
    • Jermy has the other Woodscouts respectful of his ailments and wearing medic clothes with hearts in them.

Episode 11: City Survival

Episode 12: Camp Corp

  • When Max finally confesses to David that he wants to stay at Camp Campbell, David tearfully declares that he's prepared for the day when Max comes to love Camp Campbell and pulls a lever that releases confetti, balloons, and doves. Dead ones. David admits that he expected the day to come a lot sooner.
  • While Harrison realising that he does want Camp Campbell back and that they were all friends was heartwarming, his, and Max's, reaction to this revelation falls into hilarious
    Harrison: Oh. It appears I have freaked my own mind.
    Max: (makes a little hand gesture) Tada.
  • Max doesn't need to cause chaos at Neil and Nikki's camps, as they've already done so. Neil built a napalm synthesizer and Nikki...
    Nikki: I only bit one kid.
    Mrs Campwell: Seven times!
  • Campbell turns himself in, fully expecting to go to jail for his crimes. Agents Miller decide to be lenient and give him several thousand hours of community service instead... and he'll be working in a summer camp. Camp Camp, to be precise. And he'll be taking orders from David.
    Campbell: WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING HERE?! You two said we were going to the PARK!
    • Even better, Campbell's tone of voice makes him sound like a kid whose parents tricked him into going somewhere he didn't want to go.

    Season 4 
Keep The Change
  • One scene features Max insisting that Campbell is never going to change and being horrified when Neil, Nikki, David and Gwen all insist he's undergone Character Development (with Gwen's phrasing being "Don't get me wrong, Max, you're still terrible; but you've definitely lightened up a bit"). Max's response to this is to rant "I AM MAX! THE CYNICAL REBEL! THE ONE-MAN HELL RAISER!", which prompts at most an eye roll from Neil.
  • Campbell decides he deserves to go on break for putting on clothes, completely undermining David's attempts to convince Max he's grown as a person.
  • Campbell accidentally creates a sweatshop. Again.
  • When Max is trying to corrupt Campbell, he says that he can't help being a greedy jerk, it's just in his blood. Campbell sadly agrees... then gets the idea to try to take Max's blood. Quartermaster agrees and tries to take it with a syringe (just to see what would happen) before David shows up.
  • Campbell accidentally stops a store robbery by trying to steal their trash.
  • Neil and Nikki spend most of the episode discussing whether Max is good or bad. Apparently, he once got the Wood Scouts labeled as domestic terrorists... and it isn't revealed whether that's on the "Good" or "Bad" list.
  • The punchline to Max's attempts to prove "people don't change"? David's attempts to prove him wrong end up proving David has changed for the worse. Both are left dumbstruck by this.

Attack of the Nurfs

  • A majority of the Nurf clones were spawned from pre-existing clones, and as such, some of them have a few screws loose. Nurf 2 describes them as an .mp3 to the original's lossless .flac file.
  • All the insults Alpha-Nurf hurls at the clones are something else.
  • The Nurf clones wedgied all the other campers and hung them by their underwear (except for Nerris and Space Kid, who are hung by their capes).
    • Hilariously, Ered is only hanging about a foot off the ground. It looks as if she could easily get down on her own, but is simply choosing not to. Her uncaring look especially sells it.

Who Peed the Lake?

  • Max's triumph at figuring out that everyone was guilty is short-lived, as the others start asking how they know that he hadn't peed the lake too. Under pressure he finally admits his alibi: he couldn't have secretly been in the lake because he can't swim. Upon learning this, Gwen and the other campers smugly remark on how interesting it would be if David were to learn that little tidbit, and Max quickly "deduces" that the more obvious culprit was Pikeman or someone else with a grudge against the camp and declares everyone not-guilty.

New Adventure!

  • Nikki, Nerris, and Dolph find a man who is clearly working a meth lab, and decide this adventure is "too Neil" for them. As soon as they leave, the man's trailer explodes. He does not survive.
  • Both the Wood Scouts and Flower Scouts are completely befuddled by the fact that Nikki is hanging with people who aren't Max and Neil.
  • Shortly after Nikki has forgotten her attempts to catch Sasquatch, the cryptid himself casually appears to hand Max a turtle and admonish him for his most recent closed mindedness, and then leaves. Max and Neil's faces afterwards speak for themselves.
  • Considering how his father wishes he was more manly, there's something snicker worthy about the fact that Dolph is now best friends with a pair of girls.

The Quarter-Moon Convergence

  • The "chicken noodle soup" QM makes for David and Gwen: a raw chicken floating in a bucket of water. Gwen stares at it for a moment before barfing. Cut to theme song.
  • Space Kid points out that since the stars are in space, he should be the leader for the astronomy camp. Even he laughs at the idea that anyone would listen to him.
  • Quartermaster is in peak form this episode.
    • His conversation with Harrison at the beginning of their adventure-
      Harrison: What about the others?
      QM: What about 'em? Wolves can eat their elbows.
      Harrison: Does this mean we're friends?
      QM: I don't suffer my enemies to live.
    • He apparently lost his scooter license after running over too many nuns.
    • Harrison's failed attempt at bonding.
      Harrison: Would you rather fight 100 angry ducks, or the platypus on a bad day?
      QM: Duck's got a corkscrew penis.
      Harrison: So, the platypus?
      QM: Rookie mistake.
    • His idea of "pickles" includes deer lips, chicken eyes, and pomegranate. He then eats one of them, which is notably impossible to tell which it is.
    • How he forestalls the apocalypse.
      Octopus in a Suit: Tell me why your earthly existence should continue.
      QM: All my stuff is down there.
    • A child once stole Quartermaster's identity, and now he doesn't have a name.
  • At the end, after all the teasing the campers put him through, Nikki asks if Harrison has a handkerchief she can use for her sprained arm. He pulls the "endless handkerchief" trick out of his hat, leaves it on the ground for her to keep pulling it from, and walks off.

After Hours

  • Nikki's reason for showing up at the adults' cabin is that she had a nightmare about a perfectly normal day at camp. Campbell's resigned sigh and instruction to come join the other campers makes it even funnier.
  • David apparently has a squirrel counterpart with his exact hairstyle and bandanna that commands an entire army and that even Quartermaster fears.

Camp Loser Says What?

  • Campbell's reaction to everyone's screams is a nonchalant "Not touching that one!"
  • While Gwen is reassuring David that they're going to be just fine, she tells him to run Daniel over with the bus at the first opportunity.
  • Daniel's book on starving for Zeemug is for kids. While there's the explanation that he brought it because he was going to be working with kids, fans have latched onto the much more amusing idea that he's just an overgrown Manchild.

Camp Squirrel

  • It turns out that it's not just David— there are squirrel versions of all the campers, too! And they reenact the series with blatant Lampshade Hanging, crossing straight over into Do Not Explain The Joke territory.
    Nurf: Wait, is that fat squirrel supposed to be me? Goddammit!

Camperon Campbell Can't Handle the Truth Serum

  • Nikki gets very excited over a carnivorous plant, despite Neil's warnings about how it's dangerous. She scoffs him off and turns back to find it holding her at gunpoint.

The Forest

  • The Noodle Incident mentioned at the beginning. It somehow required Space Kid being tied to the business end of Nurf's paddle.

Campfire Tales

  • Quartermaster's tale, a flashback to World War I, tells us why he only has one hand... he took a replacement hand from a soldier he tricked into walking into enemy fire.
    Quartermaster: (tests his new hand) This body is coming along nicely.
    (back to the present)
    Quartermaster: Still looking for lefty.
    (the campers all hide their hands)

Fashion Victims

  • Preston's cameo at the Flower Scout talk on fashion.
  • Vera's wandering story about how she tricked a rival ballet dancer into being eaten by hungry bears. Also, she apparently knows how to make soup out of a dog leash.
  • According to the Flower Scout pamphlet, half of all ballerinas are injured fighting their evil twin for dominance, and 75% of those who survive become killers for hire. David is very skeptical of those numbers, but apparently that's exactly what happened to Vera.

Party Pooper

  • Max upon seeing Missy:
    Max: That's the GREATEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN! (goes starry eyed)

Panicked Room

  • The episode ends with David opening the door to the Escape Room... and finding a Primal Scene involving Campbell and Miss Priss. He and Max are horrified, while Gwen is a little too gleeful at what she sees.

The Butterfinger Effect

  • After most of the kids have inexplicably changed their interests, Nikki turns into a science kid off-screen with no fanfare whatsoever in the middle of her conversation with Max.
    Nikki: I'm a scientist now. Eureka!

Time Crapsules

  • The episode ends on a pretty touching note, until...
    David: Did you just drop your bonds into the fire?
    Campbell: Oh my God! What have I done!?

Halloween Special: Night of the Living Ill
  • Just the fact that this entire episode is a parody of zombie movies using the common cold.
  • This exchange between Nikki and Preston.
    Preston: Oh good, you heard my cry for help!
    Nikki: You mean your girlish scream?
    Preston: I mean my cry for help!
  • Nurf's Heroic Sacrifice as he succumbs to the cold.
    Nurf: Tell my stoooryyyy!
    (Audible diarrhea)
    Nurf: But not this paaaart!
  • The running gag of thunder and lightning whenever anyone says "Spooky Island," even when indoors. It gets lampshaded later on.
  • Space Kid getting attacked by sick Neil:
    Nikki: Space Kid!
    Max: Leave him! He's the most expendable!
    Space Kid: (As he's dragged away) Fair enooooouuugghh!
  • Max describes the cold as spreading "just as fast as [Nikki's] mom's legs on Parents Day."
  • Campbell's wine is separated into "cheap" and "expensive." Max casually swipes a bottle of the latter.
  • Nikki finds some pogs and excitedly begins to play with them. Her enthusiasm dies in seconds as she wonders why people found them fun.
  • At one point, Preston tries to shield himself from infection by using a leopard-print thong as a mask.
  • Nikki gets really into character after she gets sick and starts actually biting people.
  • Max's immediate reaction to discovering that Space Kid isn't infected? Throw him through a window to clear an escape route.
  • Space Kid walks in on Quartermaster and one of his... friends reenacting a very creepy scene from The Shining.
    QM: (Angry muttering) Can't get no privacy 'round here. GET OUT!
  • Jasper offers to help Space Kid find medicine on the grounds that his only guests are usually "creepy old people trying to get their freak on."
  • While searching for medicine, Space Kid finds and subsequently breaks both an immortality serum and Cameron Campbell's cure for cancer. The small print on the latter mentions it's extremely toxic and should never be consumed.
  • In the end, Space Kid gets sick. While David is initially worried, Max brings up that he's still in his suit, so he can't get them sick. With the exception of Space Kid, everyone just leaves afterwards.

Holiday Special: A Camp Camp Christmas, or Whatever

  • The opening has a snowflake float out of the sky in typical holiday movie fashion to land in front of Max, who has a... less typical reaction.
    Max: What the fuck?!
  • The fact that the whole camp gets covered in snow. In the summer.
  • Nikki's excited that it's like her favorite time of the year: Parents' Day.
  • The Quartermaster's way of expressing holiday cheer.
    QM: (without any joy whatsoever) And I shall prepare a Christmas goose. *chambers a round in his shotgun hand*
  • Max decides that since it's snowing, he can finally pull up his hoodie. When he does, it only fits halfway up.
    Max: Is my head really that big?
    Neil: (pointing at his own head) Look who you're talking to.
  • Nikki shuts Neil and Max up by stuffing stockings in their mouths, stockings that were apparently worn before and somehow filled with gifts.
  • David's gift for Max is a BB gun, but he asks about safety goggles first. When the saleswoman asks if he's afraid Max will shoot his eye out, David clarifies that the goggles are for himself.
    • This proves to be the right decision when Max gets his gift and the first thing he does is try to shoot David in the eye.
  • This exchange.
    Max: What Christmas? All I see is- *looks off-screen* Jesus Christ!
    Preston: (currently dressed in nothing but underwear and a halo) Exactly!
  • Harrison puts his hat on a snowman, hoping for a magical friend. It ends as well as most of his magic does.
    Snowman: *screams before grabbing Harrison* God, I'm alive! I'm sentient! What is this?! Everything hurts, I don't have any organs, just make it stop! Oh my god! Take off the hat, just fucking kill me, kid, please! End my suffering, for the love of God, PLEASE!
  • Nurf continues to shed light on his less-than-stellar childhood. Apparently, his family leaves out Christmas beers for Santa.
  • After a heartwarming end to the special, the cast takes the time to directly address the audience to deliver a very special message... about climate change.
    Space Kid: I may be dumb when it comes to a lot of stuff, but I'm still smart enough to believe in climate change.
    Max: So if you or someone you know is still an avid climate change denier, literally what the fuck is wrong with you? You don't even have to go to a library, just google "evidence supporting climate change" and learn something for Christ sake! Oh, and vaccinate your kids while you're at it, fucking morons!

Arrival of the Torso Takers

  • "Last night, an unnamed trio..." With those words, every other camper (except Space Kid) glare at Max, Nikki, and Neil.
  • David chews out the campers for breaking into Gwen's stash and stealing an adult movie. Gwen quickly jumps in to clarify that he means a grown-up movie.
  • The reveal that David is actually Daniel is really underwhelming to Max, who was previously on the verge of believing that David had been replaced by an alien. Daniel is visibly annoyed that Max didn't treat his big reveal with more gravity.
  • Daniel's big plan is to murder Max and livestream it to David, whom he's holding hostage in the bunker. The drama is undercut a little by the fact that David's connection keeps stopping and buffering.
  • Daniel actually announces his jumpscare by saying "Jumpscare!", just like Justin McElroy in My Brother, My Brother and Me.
    • Funnier still, it actually scares David, who lets out yet another girly shriek.
  • Daniel is visibly annoyed that his more elaborate plan failed, because now he has to stab Max "like some commoner!".
  • Max fires a warning shot at David and Daniel with a crossbow and announces, "Freeze! I sorta know how to use this!"

Culture Day

  • David scolds Nerris for her presentation of her "culture":
    David: Campers, we are not here to talk about Harry Twilight.
  • Max's Culture Day contribution consists solely of a photo of Gandhi, "who I'm choosing to say is my cousin." Gwen notes that this is honestly far more effort than she had expected from him.
  • Apparently Nikki's holiday figure for Thanksgiving is a homeless man named Jeff who steals her leftovers.
  • Neil's Hanukkah story, which involves a man called Judas Maccabee who could shoot molten gold from his fingers, won the love of a powerful dragon queen, wielded the infinity gauntlet, liberated the Milky Way from the Decepticons (who were also lizard people), and had Thorin as a ringer.
  • During the B plot, Gwen and Quartermaster try to replace the culture feast that the platypus ate... with no resources other than a can of long-expired Sham. They successfully manage to create a full feast for the kids, leaving David visibly choosing not to be suspicious about how they did it.

St. Campbell's Day

  • Campbell is taking a women studies course.
    Campbell: Did you know they have rights?
  • Campbell smacking David's papers out of his hands three times in the same scene, less dramatically every time.

  • The show's April Fool's Day trailer uses the "Camp Camp Rap Rap" as its background track, and it ends with Jeremy Dooley rapping "Go to bitch, jail!"
  • The temp version of the rap shown in the Q&A episode.
    Motherfuckers rolling down the street, motherfucker yeah, motherfucker motherfucker bitch please, motherfucker slap a motherfuck, go to kill a motherfucker yeah! Bitch shit ass cunt bad words, lots of bad words, oh we hard! We went to prison! We live in prison! Pop pop! That's the sound of guns as we get shot!
  • The camp ad trailer includes a long list of camp activities, including "praying the gay away" and "praying the straight away".
  • From the soundtrack: One line in the Camp Camp Rap is "Generic rap stuff!"
    Yo I been on the streets but I don't cross 'em!
    Look both ways, left and right!
  • At RTX 2017, the crew talked about how Jermy Fartz came from a dumb joke Jordan made, and how they've wanted to use him in the show ever since. But at the same time, they knew there was a chance that he would only be funny to them and not the audience. They watched interviews with George Lucas saying that Jar Jar Binks is a great character and thought "Oh god, is this us!?"
  • Also from RTX, the behind-the-scenes editorial. It's written like a nature documentary, and although the creators give a lot of insight into why they love the show, they also tell some jokes. The best part is the ending:
    Narrator: Which character does the audience identify with the most?
    Jordan: (long pause)...Space Kid.
  • Lee Eddy imitating her two favorite lines from season 1] (Quartermaster's "No running!" and Ered's "Pussies for life!").
  • The Camp Camp RTX 2018 panel has a script reading for a special episode. The cast is reading and reacting to it for the first time, so their reactions are genuine and hilarious. In the episode, Neil invents a ray gun that accidentally switches everyone's minds and bodies, leading to some hilarious mix ups such as Max in David's body while Nikki is in his. The cast just reading lines from the character they swapped with in their own character's voice is just priceless.
    • The entire reading features necessary Reading the Stage Directions Out Loud (including Lampshade Hanging about animation requirements and costs) and the opening dialogue has Nikki informing the audience that the long dark corridor the group is walking down is long, dark and corridor-y (jokes are also made about how it apparently appeared out of nowhere for the purpose of their current situation) and Gwen announcing that anyone who references a horror movie cliche "will be shoved to the ground and left for dead". Jermy also references a Girlfriend in Canada, who he later admits doesn't actually exist.
    • Yuri isn't present to voice Neil so one of the other actors does so; the question is raised about something being wrong with his voice which is denied.
    • Lee makes a joke about agreeing to the experiment "to move the skit along".
      Lee!David: [In Gwen's body] Hey, it worked! Jermy's way- Oh my gosh...What happened to my voice?
      Miles!Max: [In David's body] WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?

      Miles!Max: [In David's body] God, Neil! As if camp isn't terrible enough already. Okay, roll call! Who the fuck is who now? I'm Max, living my worst fucking nightmare, being stuck in David's stupid body!
      Lee!David: [In Gwen's body] You're welcome, Max! I hope you treat it as well as I have! I like to start my mornings with a hearty steel-cut oatmeal breakfast and-
      Miles!Max: [In David's body] I AM NOT GOING TO DO ANY OF THAT!
      Lee!David: [In Gwen's body] David here! Gosh, I always wanted to know what it was like to be inside of someone else's shoes. So, I chose to make this an educational experience! Now, I'll finally know what it's like to be inside Gwen!
      Miles Luna: [Slams the table] WHICH ONE OF YOU THREE!? WHICH ONE OF YOU!? LEIGH! I KNEW IT!
      Miles Luna: I'd like to take a quick intermission to point out that Leigh is just all about shipping and trash ships! And now you all know it too!
    • Gwen-in-Nikki's response to the above Ship Tease (once the actors compose themselves after scolding Leigh) is to flip out and inform David-in-Gwen that he is not going to be doing any form of education whatsoever! This prompts a flat "So, that's Gwen."
    • Nikki's disappointment at being in Max's body instead of the platypus and Max's immense offense at this (which he doesn't show off immediately because he's distracted by explaining to her that "that's not how this works") is hilarious as well, as is his furious denial when she calls his hair "floofy" - followed by his anxious order for her not to mess it up when she starts playing with it.
      Michael!Nikki: [In Max's body] Hey, I have a ding dong now!
    • During a Seven Minute Lull that follows everyone stepping all over each other's lines (as instructed by the script), Gwen-in-Nikki says "It's gonna be underage!" Which prompts both in and out of character shock (Miles in particular has been described as having a "Where the hell did that even come from?" expression as his head whips in her direction) and she stammers that she meant her date with her boyfriend.
    • How the "new kid"/audience member who fired the gun that created this whole mess is treated and the random bringing in of a "sister" (a random female audience member) to fix it since Max-in-David doesn't trust the "new kid" after "he fucked it up last time and should be banned from this convention".
    • The fact that Neil completely forgot that body-swapping had occurred in testing and had not been corrected before having the gun fired and landing on "let's exchange bodily fluids (the easiest method of which would be kissing and would have required additional body swaps to work)" instead of just firing the gun again.
    • There's something absolutely hysterical of the effect of Gwen being in Nikki's body on her demand for Neil to "fix this damn it! Now!" While it would be in character for Gwen to the point of almost being boring, with her currently in Nikki's body, it just makes her sound like an absolute brat.
  • In the same panel, a fan asked a hypothetical question about whether David would get along with Max's parents if he met them. Miles mulled for a second over whether or not he should answer that question...and then Michael leans in and says, in his Max voice, "Do you wanna answer it, Daaaaaaad?!"
  • Camp Camp meets RWBY. (Do not watch if you haven't gotten up to Season 6 of RWBY.) Freeze Frame Bonuses include:
    • Blake disappearing when Jaune pulls everyone else into a group hug (and Yang's eyes flashing red).
    • Pyrrha making "Bambi eyes" at Jaune (who remains oblivious, of course).
    • "Archery."
    • "Miming."
  • Amusingly and perfectly in character, a lot of gifs of David on Twitter actually seamlessly loop, such as his “not one, not three, but two!” animation.
  • Pretty much the entire Camp Camp blooper video:
    • Brainwashed Max from "Cult Camp":
      Max: (cheerful and stilted) Suck a dick, David. I have Daniel now. He has no dick to suck.
    • Michael Jones randomly bursting into song as Max. On a similar note, David rapping.
    • "He won't stop fucking them! And then he'll fuck me! Oh my goooood!"
    • Young David goes off on a tangent about Blue's Clues, and concludes that Mrs. Pepper was cheating on Mr. Salt.
      David: I think she was seeing another shaker. You don't get paprika from salt and pepper. That ho was cheating!
    • Michael flubbing Max's "Don't group me in with those losers," line ends up Crossing the Line Twice.
      Max: Hey! Don't grope me...pffth, don't grope me. I'm TEN!"
    • Little Davey is optimistic about his future. Miles Luna doing an impression of a child trying to do an impression of an adult just sells it.
      David: Ah, puberty, you know, it ain't hit me yet, but...really crossing my fingers for a six-pack. Yup. They're, they're gonna say, "what are those, what are those two tree trunks walking around for," and I'll say, (attempts a deeper gravelly voice) "No, those are my legs." That's what- God I hope I sound like that.
    • "I knew it! You're just in this for the fat man's presents! And I'm not talking about that fat fuck Nurf over there. Real piece a' shit. Hear his voice actor's a piece a' shit too. Fuck you, Blaine!"


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