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Funny / Bullets over Broadway

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  • Harvey Fierstein steals every scene he's in.
    Partygoer: Helen has such a-a-a... a new vitality. Even her face looks so smooth.
    Sid: I know. The monkey glands are working.
  • Helen: Look, I haven't had a drink since New Year's Eve.
    Sid: You're talking Chinese New Year's.
    Helen: Naturally. Still, that's two days, Sid! You know how long that is for me?
  • David's near Spit Take right after Helen makes this corker of a line:
    Helen: You stand on the brink of greatness. The world will open to you like an oyster. No... not like an oyster. The world will open to you like a magnificent vagina.