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Funny / Brainbent

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  • John's reaction when he's asked why he's in the institution:
    John: (blushing) I did the "Windy Thing" in public.
  • Sollux and Gamzee made a cake and had a fight with icing... and ended up getting it on, right on the kitchen floor, while still covered in icing.
    • "[Sollux] now knows what the word "motherfucker" tastes like when sighed from one mouth into another, and it is driving him insane."
    • Earlier in the story, Sollux takes the liberty of kindly informing the new orderly (who's busy reading stuff about urethral piercing on his smartphone instead of watching them) that getting such body modification at home can only end badly- i.e. his penis will "get infected and fall off, for fuck’th thake!". He would have been punched, had Gamzee not come to the rescue.
  • VastDerp kindly provided a translation of everything Latula and Mituna said (i.e. provided a non-quirk version) and translated Mituna answering Latula with 'Fuck you' as 'As you wish, my flower'.
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    • Mituna's... X-rated comments during that entire post.
  • Jade got angry at Karkat and told him to go boil his shirt. Karkat just said, "Boil my what?"
  • Nepeta: Be the bacon Cthulhu.
  • Sollux: "Who ii2 thii2 tiiny walkiing ragega2m and why doe2 hii2 head keep makiing noii2e2?"
  • At one point, Dave complains that they name everything after him. Sollux named the new computer Dave, and when Dave tried to rename it, it quoted 2001: A Space Odyssey at him.
  • Gamzee going berserk...over Paula Deen.
  • Clubs Deuce telling Sollux that he has to promise to apologise, "Right here, in this car, with Nicki Minaj as our witness."
    • In that vein, the entire story of Dad 1/Pol's 40th birthday.
  • Karkat Is A Vengeful God. Title says it all, really.
  • Dave was asked what he thought of Terezi. Rose summed up his response as 'Fascinating. So, in essence, Ms Pyrope can best be described in your opinion as being too legit to quit.' Dave was... just a tad freaked out.
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  • Kanaya explaining about how plants can be edible, and then started explaining all the ways in which one can eat roses.
  • Gamzee wishing Dave luck twice, because he forget he already did it the first time.
  • Rose and Kanaya playing dream therapists. And what happens when Equius finds out.
    • At one point, a man asks for advice about an extremely homoerotic dream he had (as in, "all male orgy" levels of homoerotic), Rose and Kanaya's first response is to hound him for more details.
  • Sollux and Gamzee interacting with Calliope. In particular, Sollux complaining that Gamzee "dragged him away from Candy Crush Saga", then asking Gamzee if they're going to the laundry room (Gamzee confirms that they'll do that later), Gamzee not swearing in front of Calliope and Calliope's adorable comic about a cat that steals rent money from a mouse before getting kicked by a knight who bears a very strong resemblance to Dave. And then there's Calliope's little message at the end:
    that's only ok for my comic we dont kick real cats its mean
    • When Gamzee says that they're going to meet 'Bright Eyes' (his nickname for Calliope), Sollux assumes that he's talking about the band. Gamzee has no clue what he's talking about, and when they actually meet Calliope, Sollux's first line is 'oh, uh, hello liittle giirl who ii2 not conor ober2t'.
  • Gamzee and Jade singing "Come Together" by the Youngbloods, though Gamzee alters some of the lyrics. Then there's Karkat's hilariously over the top response.
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  • Karkat's reaction to fall is to kick trees and scream 'Turn green, you fuckers!' at the leaves.
  • Nepeta discovering how to make eye contact.
  • Someone asks the staff and residents what they'd wish for most if they could have one wish before they died. While most of the responses are either Tearjerkers or heartwarming, Tavros decides to be a cheeky little shit and ask if he can wish for immortality.

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