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The webcomic:

  • Abigail's utterly unimpressed reaction to learning her task:
    Head Witch of South: Abigail... you are the key to bringing about... the END of the WORLD.
    Abigail: (beat) Okay.
  • The head of the Krud coven telling Daniel to go and try to talk to the Tummy Boys. When Daniel asks why he has to...
    Head of the Krud coven: (grumpy) I don't want to! Okay! And I'm making you do it! Which I can!!!
  • Abigail apparently doesn't have a grasp at the concept of jokes. This doesn't stop her from being hilarious.
    Daniel: Are you by chance a... a gun for hire?
    Abigail: *completely serious* No. I am a gun for a higher calling.
    • That is followed by a calm speech about the nearing end of the world and how it makes worldly worries gratuitous, while Daniel and the bartender gape at her.
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  • Peppo Bismo. For upset tummies.
  • When Daniel asks Abigail whether she has slept at all, Abigail states she doesn't know what he means by that, but she finds it very rude that he just stopped talking to her for several hours.
  • "Anything will be more glamorous than garbage man! Even-" "Role: TOWN MORON"
  • Daniel's failure at getting up in the morning.
  • During a ceremony of the Society of Clocks, on a rooftop, in dramatic rain, and with Daniel desperately trying to convince the Society not to harm Abigail, the latter suddenly crashes out of the casket the Society has shut her into, flinging the lid and the surrounding candles violently away... only to yawn and ask them all politely to keep it down a bit, because she'd been sleeping.
  • The duo needs $2 to pass a toll booth. Abigail, upon being asked, rips her arm and gun through the front of a T-shirt she was wearing over her poncho. When the booth keeper and Daniel panic, Abigail realizes that "dollar" does not mean "gun" and asks what a dollar is.
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  • "You gotta ask... politely." "Politely give us those two dole-airs."
  • In the chapel in Daggum, cue weddings:
    Abigail: Daniel... What's love?
    Daniel: Love... is, uh... when you really really really really... like someone.
    Abigail: Oh. *suddenly appears in Love Bubbles and Bishie Sparkle* ...Daniel?
    Daniel: *breaks out in cold sweat* W-w-w-wwwwww-wwwhat, Abigail?
    Abigail: *cheerful* I don't love you.
    Daniel: *relieved* Th-that's okay. You don't have t—
  • Abigail mistaking poker chips for edible chips.
  • Confronted by Queenie's Boys who bring her a threatening "invitation" to Queenie who wants to "talk" to her, Abigail... still doesn't get social nuances.
    Abigail: We want to save the princess! Give it!

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