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"Nobody would know. Nobody."

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  • The very first lines of the movie:
    Tony: [bouncing off a force field] Shit!
    Cap: Language!
    • A few minutes later:
      Tony: Wait a second. No-one else is gonna deal with the fact that Cap just said "language"?
      Steve: I know! [pauses to hurl his bike through the front of a jeep] It just slipped out.
    • Then shortly after that, as they're coordinating strategy:
      Tony: And for gosh's sake, watch your language!
    • Better yet, Steve knowing he'll Never Live It Down:
      Steve: [resigned voice] That's not going away any time soon...
    • This then becomes a running gag...
      Maria Hill: Steve, he [Hawkeye] said a bad language word.
      Steve: [exasperated, to Tony] Did you tell everyone about that??
    • ...with everyone...
      Fury: Outwit the platinum bastard.
      Natasha: [matter-of-fact-ly] Steve doesn't like that kind of talk.
      Steve: [trying not to smile] You know what, Romanov...?
    • ...up to and including Fury getting in on it.
      Steve: Fury, you son of a bitch!
      Fury: Ooh, do you kiss your mother with that mouth of yours?
    • With the last one, note the irony of Samuel L. Jackson telling Cap to watch his language.
    • It's almost a meta-joke, where Cap is reminding Iron Man of the kiddies in the audience.
    • And one final note of hilarity, in the TBS Broadcast Edit, Tony's curse is bowdlerized to a mere "dang it!", making Cap sound like even more of a prude.
  • While the badass shot of all six Avengers leaping into battle is awesome, Hulk turns to the camera as if he's posing for a picture.
  • Quicksilver quipping "You didn't see that coming?" with a smirk after attacking Hawkeye. In turn, Clint saying the exact same thing while surprising Pietro in the Avengers Tower by shooting the floor out from under Pietro's feet.
  • Strucker receives his sitrep:
    Henchman: Herr Strucker, it's the Avengers!
    Strucker: Can we hold them?!
    Henchman: They're the Avengers...
  • Tony breaks into the fort and everyone starts firing at him:
    Tony: [unfazed] Guys, stop. We gotta talk this through.
    [unleashes the anti-personnel cannons on his shoulders from his first movie]
    Tony: Good talk.
    Henchman: [weakly from the floor] No, it wasn't!
  • After Tony neutralizes the henchmen, JARVIS informs him of a suspiciously reinforced wall and air current "on his left." Tony's childish glee at the prospect of finding a secret entrance is precious.
    Tony: [very quickly] Please be a secret door, please be a secret door, please be a secret door...
    [secret door opens]
    Tony: Yay!
  • Baron Von Strucker telling his men that they will never surrender, before turning to his second-in-command and saying:
  • Hawkeye is wounded and Natasha goes to help him.
    Natasha: [dodging bullets] Can someone take care of that bunker?
    [Hulk comes charging in and smashes the bunker to pieces]
    Natasha: Thank you.
    • This exchange
      Bruce: How's he doing?
      Tony: Well, unfortunately, he's still Barton.
      Bruce: That's terrible.
    • Natasha's joke about the situation at Barton's expense:
      Natasha: Are you sure he's going to be OK? Pretending to need this guy really brings the team together.
    • And Tony returning with Barton's drink, insisting that he's dead and they need to call his time of death, to which Barton smoothly replies he's going to live forever due to being made of the plastic that Dr. Cho is repairing his side with.
  • While the Avengers were cooling off in the Quinjet after the battle in the first scenes, Natasha tries to comfort a wary and drawn Bruce about the people he'd injured or killed. For support, Natasha turns to Thor, which might not have been the best idea.
    Natasha: Thor, report on the Hulk.
    Thor: [enthusiastically] The gates of Hel are filled with the screams of his victims. [Fist Pump]
    Natasha: [glares at him as if to say "Dude, Not Funny!" while Bruce groans and puts his head in his hands]
    • And then Thor tries to correct his faux pas. (With Steve grimacing all the while in the background.)
      Thor: But not the screams of the dead, of course. No, no... wounded screams... mainly whimpering, a great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids and...gout.
  • Anytime Steve catches Thor at his dude-not-really-the-right-time moments, really.
  • Tony telling JARVIS to take over piloting the Quinjet, before the camera zooms to reveal a bumper sticker on the dashboard saying 'JARVIS is my co-pilot'.
  • The Avengers playing Let's See Who Can Pick Up Thor's Hammer.
    • Clint indulges in some Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe describing the worthiness requirement:
      Barton: "Whosoevereth be he worthy shall haveth the powerrrrrr!"
    • Tony tries bare handed. Then he puts on his Iron Man gauntlet. Then he enlists Rhodey and his gauntlet and they still can't do it. Eventually he says "Thor's fingerprints are the direct translation".
      Tony: If I lift it, I then rule Asgard?
      Thor: Of course.
      Tony: (Trailer dialogue) I shall be fair, but firmly cruel...and maybe work out 'the wench clause.'
      Tony: (Film dialogue) I shall be reinstating the Prima Nocta.
    • Though he doesn't lift it, Steve is able to budge Mjolnir. Thor, for a brief moment, looks a bit worried.note 
      • For reference, Thor had casually promised Asgard to anyone who could lift it. It's doubtful any of his friends would have actually taken him up on it, least of all Captain Rogers, but that doesn't diminish the hilarity of the whole scene.
    • Bruce pretends to Hulk Out while trying to lift it, trying to scare the others. It doesn't work. It's pretty funny if you remember that Hulk, the brute-force guy, already tried that in the first movie, and couldn't budge it.
    • Natasha refuses to try, saying "That's not a question I need answered." In the comics, she eventually does wield the hammer.
      • Her line could also be a mild dig at her friends' pissing contest.
    • At the end, Thor approaches Mjolnir and says very smugly/teasing that there's a simple explanation. He dramatically reaches for it... and then hoists it like a knife and flips it like a spatula. "You are all not worthy."
    • Blink and you'll miss it, but Clint sticks his tongue out in response to the above.
    • Pay close attention and you'll notice that Thor deliberately doesn't touch the hammer with his fingertips, thus proving Tony wrong.
  • Scarlet Witch takes out the Avengers one-by-one... until she gets to Hawkeye. Who snaps around and gets her right in the face with an arrowhead which unfolds to attach to her forehead and shock her senseless.
    • There's a bit of meta-humor in this since Jeremy Renner complained about his character spending the majority of the previous film brainwashed.
  • During the fight in the tanker, after Hawkeye incapacitates Wanda. Pietro rushes in and knocks him through a window before running off with his sister. Hawkeye's response?
    Hawkeye: [groaning] Yeah, you better run.
  • When the Avengers confront Tony in his lab after Ultron's first attack, Tony breaks into inappropriate giggles. Kinda ruins the solemn mood, but it's Bruce's frantic Tony-not-freaking-now shaking of the head that clinches it.
    Bruce: Tony, maybe this might not be the time...
    Tony: Really? That's it? You just roll over and show your belly, every time somebody snarls?
    Bruce: Only when I've created a murder-bot.
    Thor: Because Stark is right.
    Bruce: Oh no, it's definitely the end times.
  • Laura Barton telling her husband "You know I totally support your avenging."
  • Tony rationalizes that Ultron will probably go after him first in the final battle. Cue The Vision walking by in the background, saying "That's true, he hates you the most." Clearly, J.A.R.V.I.S.' voice wasn't all that made it into him. Tony says nothing, but his face is clearly saying, "We all knew that, but did you have to say it?"
    • Vision's Establishing Character Moment? As Barton, Stark, Banner, Thor and the Maximoffs are deciding whether they can trust Vision, he hands Thor his hammer as if it's no big deal. This is immediately followed by several well-deserved seconds of uncomfortable, stunned silence. And then afterwards, Thor gives Tony a pat on the back and a "Well done."
  • Discussions on the role division in the team.
    Hill: All set up, boss.
    Stark: Actually, he's the boss. [gestures to Cap] I just pay for everything...and design everything...and make everyone look cooler.
  • Natasha weaving through traffic on a motorcycle:
    Natasha: [to Cap on the radio] I'm coming in. Can you keep him occupied?
    Cap: [while fighting Ultron on top of truck] What do you think I've been doing?!
  • Even Ultron gets his moments.
    Ultron: I can't physically throw up in my mouth...
  • Ultron has a lot of memorable scenes, and often comes across as more human than actual human MCU villains. Case in point, hacking off Klaue's arm in a rage after being compared to Tony Stark... then apologizing and awkwardly reassuring him that it's probably going to be okay.
    • When Ultron first meets the Maximoffs, he tries to make a grand speech on people engineering their own destruction, but ruins the moment by forgetting important words.
      Ultron: Everyone creates the thing they dread. Men of peace create engines of war. Invaders create Avengers. People create... smaller people...? Uh... CHILDREN! [chuckles in embarrassment] I lost the word there...
    • When asked if he means to end the Avengers, he clarifies, "I'm here to save the world! [beat] But also... yeah."
    • He doesn't have much respect for Cap's shield.
      Ultron: The most versatile substance on the planet, and they used it to make a Frisbee.
    • In general, Ultron's greatest character trait is his humorous ability to go from grandiose speaking, full of cold and condescending visions of his perfect future, to an almost whiny tone about how he's getting stiffed.
  • Neither Gwyneth Paltrow nor Natalie Portman actually appear in the movie, their characters being written out as managing her own company and being caught up in important scientific research respectively. Thor and Tony make a "my-girlfriend-is-better-than-yours" contest out of it, with Thor getting the last word in: "Jane's still better."
    • With Maria coughing "testosterone" under her breath for good measure.
      • For that matter, Maria seems a lot looser and less tense in this move than in The Avengers (as well as a bit more comedic, not unlike a certain Canadian news anchor).
    • A minor note, but the way Thor stumbles over the term "Nobel Prize" shows that, yes, he's getting better, but no, he still doesn't quite get Midgard.
  • Stan Lee's Cameo as a Normandy veteran at the Avenger Tower party who demands Thor to let him have a sip of the special thousand-year old Asgardian brew that he and Steve are drinking:
    Thor: It is not meant for mortal men.
    Lee: Neither was Omaha Beach, blondie. Stop trying to scare us, come on.
    Thor: All right. [pours some mead]
    [Cut to Lee being carried off in a daze]
    Lee: [muttered] Egg...shell...sea...oar. note 
    • His fellow veterans didn't do much better. Some are slumped over the counter, while others are still on their feet, but unconscious.
  • Steve comments that Natasha isn't just flirting with Bruce, because he's been up close to her flirting. Then, after telling Bruce to give it a shot, Bruce frowns and asks, "Wait, what do you mean up close?"
  • During the chaos of Ultron's first attack on the Avengers, Bruce accidentally falls into Natasha's cleavage.
    • Which was because he pulled her out of the way, behind the bar. While he's on top, she says "Don't turn green." Could be a call back to The Incredible Hulk, and with a similar scene in that movie, could be a case of Getting Crap Past the Radar.
  • When Thor confronts Tony Stark about creating Ultron, he grabs him by the neck and lifts him a foot off the ground.
    Tony: [strained] C'mon, use your words, buddy!
    Thor: I have more than enough words to describe you, Stark!
  • Klaue being unimpressed with the Maximoffs and treats them like children by offering them sweets. Pietro uses his superhuman speed to grab one.
    • His biggest fear? Cuttlefish note .
  • Further demonstrating, however much he would deny it, how much Ultron takes after Tony: he responds to Thor saying that no one needs to break anything with "Clearly you've never made an omelet," to which Tony mutters in aside, "He beat me by one second..."
  • Quicksilver tries to grab Mjolnir while it's in mid-flight, and goes sailing through the air.
    • His face when he first sees Mjolnir is all childlike-glee and screams "This is awesome, I've got to do this!" When things go wrong, his Oh, Crap! face is something to behold.
  • Wanda puts a spell on Thor which seems to not affect him at first but as he warns the others:
    Thor: The girl tried to warp my mind. Take special care, I doubt a human could keep her at bay. Fortunately, I am mighty. [looks around and realizes he's in Hel]
  • After Wanda messes with Bruce's brain and turns him into the Hulk. Tony tries to calm him down by stating he's better then Wanda's mind control. However, because Tony called him "Banner", this just seems to make the Hulk angrier.
    Tony: Listen to me. That little witch is messing with your mind. You're stronger than her. You're smarter than her. You're Bruce Banner—
    Hulk: [highly indignant roar]
    Tony: RIGHTRIGHTRIGHT don't mention puny Banner! [catches the car Hulk throws at him, only for Hulk to punch through it]
    • He calls him Bruce a couple more times after this, too.
      Tony: Oh, in the back? DICK MOVE, Banner!
      Tony: C'mon, Bruce, you gotta work with me!
  • Tony's Hulkbuster armor has a piston fist capable of Rapid-Fire Fisticuffs, which he uses to punch the Hulk in the face like a bobblehead.
    Tony: [while punching] Gotosleepgotosleepgotosleep...
    • Funnier when you realize this is basically Stark's best attempt at Natasha's Lullaby.
  • This stellar moment:
    Tony: GOING DOWN?? [smashes Hulk overhead with an improvised elevator morning star, then lunges in and decks Hulk]
    Hulk: [turns to look at him, spits out a tooth, and glares]
    Tony: [meekly] ...I'm sorry.
    [cut to the Hulkbuster suit flying through a solid wall]
    • Before that, you can see one of the guys in the elevator rapidly pressing what is undoubtedly the close door button when he sees Iron Man and the Hulk duking it out in front of them.
  • After the Hulk seriously damages his Hulkbuster, Tony demands a damage report. The suit just emits a garbled squawk.
    Tony: That was comprehensive!
  • Tony Stark, finding an empty skyscraper to plough into to stun a raging Hulk:
  • And in the end, he knocks Bruce out the same way Hulk punched Thor away in the first film.
  • When she shows up, Tony thinks that the pregnant Laura Barton is "an agent of some kind." Then Clint's kids come in. A dumbfounded Tony tries to say that they're "two smaller agents".
    • Especially funny given that it mirrors his creation Ultron's "smaller people" line from earlier.
    • Better yet, look at Cap's expression upon reacting to the fact that Hawkeye is married and has two kids. What did Cap think at the time, anyway? Fondue?
  • Thor accidentally breaks the Lego toys of Barton's kids and quietly tries to sweep them under a chair with his foot while no one (aside from a judgmental-looking/disapproving Steve) is looking.
    • Then, Clint's little daughter GLARES at a now sheepish Thor. The only character in the MCU (Thus Far) capable of going toe to toe with the Hulk sheepishly denies having done anything at all to a little girl.
  • Nick Fury on Ultron.
    Fury: Guy’s multiplying faster than a Catholic rabbit.
    • Cut to Steve doing a double-take at Clint, the only one of the team who has "multiplied."note 
  • Selvig walks out of a school to find Thor standing on the passenger side of his car in Midgardian casual wear, including a dark sweater with the hood raised.
    Selvig: Nice look. If you're going for inconspicuous, though, near miss.
  • Tony would like to clarify that he doesn't want Bruce to help him put JARVIS into The Vision. He wants to help Bruce put JARVIS into The Vision.
    • There's also Tony's incredibly awkward attempts to bring up his idea to put JARVIS in The Vision instead of destroying the body. It's like he's saying, "Yeah, I know the last time we tried this ended incredibly badly, but hear me out!"
    • Bruce's response that "I'm in a time loop!" as the only possible explanation why Tony wants to again do the very thing that got them into this mess in the first place.
  • When Tony is in Norway searching the internet for answers, two techs can be seen in the background taking a selfie with him.
  • Nat going "Beep beep!" while zooming through the city on a motorcycle.
  • Quicksilver tries to rally the police into getting the city evacuated, but it takes a couple tries.
    Quicksilver: [zooms in] We're under attack! Clear the city! Now! [zooms away]
    [everyone shrugs and returns to whatever they were doing, one guard continues gaming]
    (beat)
    Quicksilver: [zooms back in with an assault rifle and fires a burst into the ceiling] Get off your asses. [tosses the rifle to a nearby guy and zooms off again]
    • It's his tone of voice that really makes the moment. It screams 'My country has the worst police force ever'.
  • Tony breaks into a collapsing skyscraper to save some civilians, which leads to a demand you don't often hear from superheroes.
    Tony: [awkwardly] Hiiii... [searches the room] Okay, get in the tub!
  • After Hawkeye and Wanda manage to finish taking out a batch of drones.
    Hawkeye: We're clear here.
    Steve: [still fighting on his end] We are not clear here! We are very not clear!
  • A member of the Sokovian police, trying to shoot at the Ultron drones, accidentally hits Quicksilver as he's evacuating the city. The shot then cuts to the police looking at each other accusingly, then back to Quicksilver, whose expression can only be described as "...Dude! Really?!" The next time Quicksilver gets shot, it's a lot less funny.
  • Cap and Tony have a firewood-chopping contest at Clint's farm to let off steam. When Laura calls Tony in to look at their tractor, he warns Cap not to take from his pile...which is slightly less than half the size of Steve's.
    • At one point during their discussion, Steve gets so angry at Tony that he rips one of the logs in half with his bare hands.
  • It's very quick, but when Tony goes into the barn to fix the tractor, he greets it with a congenial, "Hello, dear..." almost as if this very basic machine were a cow. The joke comes when you realize the brand is a John Deere. Tony really can't help himself sometimes.
    • The subtitles make the "Hello, Deere" so blatant you have to wonder if the company got a Product Placement deal just so Tony could make that joke.
    • In the same scene, Nick Fury appears to ask Tony to not bring the tractor to life like he did with Ultron.
    • Behind the scenes, the line wasn't actually scripted. Robert Downey Jr. ad-libbed it and Joss Whedon was furious with himself for not thinking of it first and scripting it.
  • Natasha was told that Laura's child would be named after her. When Laura tells her that they're having a boy, she whispers "traitor" to her stomach.
    • Made heartwarming in the end when he's named Nathaniel with Pietro as his middle name. Then goes back to funny when Natasha comments that the baby is "fat".
  • Natasha kisses Bruce, only to push him off a ledge. He comes back as the Hulk and takes her to Ultron's floating island by leaping really high. The sound of the normally unflappable Black Widow crying out in fear is priceless. Lampshaded mere seconds later.
    Black Widow: I really hope this makes us even.
  • After being overwhelmed by Vision, Thor and Iron Man, Ultron realizes he's not going to win this one and tries to talk his way out.
    Ultron: You know, with the benefit of hindsight... [he's sent flying by Hulk mid-sentence].
    • Hulk then proceeds to turn and growl at a group of other bots, who immediately run in fear.
  • In the grand finale, when Ultron has stolen the Avengers' Quinjet, Hulk jumps on board, followed by the most hilariously exasperated: "Oh, for God's sake!" from Ultron before he gets thrown out of the plane. The fact that it happens all off camera makes the moment.
    • We hear the Hulk and Ultron, then we have the eight-foot-tall robot get chucked out of the jet screaming and waving his limbs around.
    • The best part is the delivery: Ultron does not lose his calm demeanor all the while this is happening, treating being beaten up and thrown out of a jet like a minor nuisance. Made more hilarious that we know he's capable of actually flying into a rage.
  • Add a seemingly never ending wave of robots with a World of Snark, and at times the heroes complain about the attacks.
    Tony: Cap, you got incoming!
    Steve: [groaning after being hit by a bot a few seconds before] ...Incoming already came in.
  • After Steve and Thor narrowly save a woman from plunging off a bridge, an Ultron advances on Steve, ranting about how he can't save them all.
    Ultron: You'll neve-
    [Steve hits him with the shield, then summons it back with his gauntlet. Ultron flies off the cliff]
    Steve: I'll never what?! YOU DIDN'T FINISH!
  • After above mentioned scene, a car crashes down next to Steve, with Thor on top of the car. After the two leave, the driver and passenger in said car slowly crawl out of the car and the driver is about to throw up. Steve's reaction:
    Steve: [to Thor] What? Were you napping?
    • Also a nice subtle Call-Back to the Battle of New York from the first movie:
    Thor: Ready for another bout?
    Steve: What? You getting sleepy?
  • Ultron casually saying, "THOR... you're bothering me."
  • While being choked by Ultron:
    Thor: I am Thor, son of Odin, and as long as there is life in my breast, I am...running out of things to say, are you ready? [looks past Ultron]
    [Ultron turns in time for Vision to whack him with Mjolnir]
    • Which is then followed by Thor and Vision casually commenting on how well balanced the hammer is, with Thor noting that you lose power on the swing if you put too much weight into it.
  • Thor asks "Is that the best you can do?!". Ultron chuckles a bit and summons a swarm of his droids towards them. Captain America is quick to say "You had to ask."
  • Tony helping Rhodey protect the Helicarrier and the evacuating civilians, which leads to this conversation that probably sounded a lot better in his head.
    Rhodey: What? You don't think I can hold my own?
    Tony: Tell you what. After this is over, I'll hold your own.
    Rhodey: You HAD to make it weird...
  • The S.H.I.E.L.D. technician who sends out the rescue craft has some trouble with his terminology.
    Technician: Number 6 boat is topped and locked, or, uh, or stocked, topped, s- it... It's, uh, full of people.
  • War Machine and Vision's team-up, which really confuses Rhodey. His 'WTF just happened?' expression is priceless. Clearly, nobody is keeping Rhodes updated on recent events.
    Rhodey: Okay, what?
  • The final conversation Thor has with Steve and Tony: It's about Mjolnir worthiness and elevators. Which could be a hilarious Call-Back to when Thor hung it up on a coat hanger. Considering all the talk about the worthiness of said hanger, it has now become an Ascended Meme. And then there's Thor's clearly-amused reaction that he's gonna miss these little talks of theirs.
  • Ultron accuses the Vision of naïveté. Vision points out: "Well, I was born yesterday."
  • After she patches up Hawkeye, Dr. Cho is invited to the Avengers' post-battle party. She points out that unlike some people she has work to do, and can't really spare the time to party. Then...
    "Will Thor be there?"
  • After the Avengers receive the call to head to the church, Quicksilver dashes to where Hawkeye and Scarlet Witch are fighting, picks up his sister and teases Barton over his age and lack of super-speed. As Pietro runs off, Clint readies his bow and starts telling himself no one would know if he fired at Pietro and just starts ranting about it.
    Clint: [aiming] Nobody would know. Nobody. [sheathes arrow] "Last I saw him, an Ultron was sitting on him. Yeah, he'll be missed, that quick little bastard. I miss him already!"
    • Clint and Pietro's annoying-brothers relationship in general. (Crosses over with Heartwarming.) Clint was the first one who gets attacked by Quicksilver in the Sokovia raid, and they try and one-up each other in the movie, even after Pietro defects from Ultron's side. Which makes it all the more heartbreaking when Quicksilver dies saving Hawkeye. Damn it, Whedon.
  • This line from Tony to Nat and the Hulk.
    Tony: You better not be playing "hide the zucchini."
    • Some dubs use "playing doctor" instead, which still works.
  • At the Avengers' party, Rhodey's trading stories with Thor and Tony. When he finishes his War Machine story, Tony and Thor expect there to be more than there is, to Rhodey's dismay. Later we see him telling the same party to some civilians, who react to the Bond One-Liner ("BOOM! You looking for this!?") he delivers in the way he'd expect, then cue a close up on his face that reveals that Rhodey specifically sought out some civilians to tell the story to so he can get some reassurance that he is a badass.
  • When Steve teases Natasha about her staring at the wall on her own while she was waiting for Cap by the end of the movie, Natasha has a suitable comeback:
    Natasha: I thought you and Tony were still gazing into each other's eyes.
  • Clint is trying to convince Wanda to help and fight.
    Clint: The city is flying. We're fighting an army of robots. And I have a bow and arrow. None of this makes sense!
    • Which is also something of a Brick Joke for those who remember this Saturday Night Live sketch, where Jeremy Renner makes fun of his character being an archer amidst superheroes.
    • After Wanda helps out and blasts one of the drones before it could blast her, the drone's energy blast takes out another nearby drone
  • Captain America: "I miss the days when the weirdest thing science created was me."
  • Thor reassures Steve and Tony that he'll find out the truth about the Infinity Stones.
    Thor: Except for this one [pats Stark], everything has an explanation.
    • After Heimdall picks him up, Tony and Steve are left staring at the Bifrost burn on the grass.
      Tony: That man has no respect for lawn maintenance.
  • After Clint's been throwing darts in the background for a while, he freaks Tony out by throwing one right past his face. It's at least four darts at once in a cluster, all of them hitting the bull's eye.
  • Serious as the scene was, Ultron calling out to Pietro and Wanda after they discover his true plan and abandon him was pretty silly. His tone of voice is saying "Aww, c'mon, guys, it's just world extermination. No big deal really!" He sounds like a whiny kid who's been blown off by his friends.
  • When Tony arrives in the church to confront Ultron, Ultron plays priest.
    Ultron: Come to confess your sins?
    Tony: That depends, how much time you got?
    • On seeing Ultron's new body, Tony asks the killer robot "Have you been juicing?"
  • Even when he's talking to Dr. Cho, who's under mind control as she's downloading his matrix into the Vision body, Ultron acts impatient and apologizes. Both Spader's line reading and the animation of Ultron is hilarious as he acts like a guy getting a checkup.
    Ultron: How soon? I'm not being pushy.
    • When Dr. Cho disconnects the cradle after Wanda subtly frees from her mind control, Ultron just gives an annoyed sigh as if to say, "Really?"
  • When the Avengers learn Ultron had killed Strucker in his cell, they that he was covering up Strucker's connections but Ultron erased all their data on him. Cut to all the Avengers poring over boxes of files trying to find any lead. The sight of these superheroes, especially Thor, rifling through papers is amusing. It's also reminiscent of scenes of Joss Whedon's TV show Buffy the Vampire Slayer whenever the Scooby Gang would do research on a demon in the school library.
  • When Tony mentioned that he knows Ulysses Klaue from back during his days as an Arms Dealer, Cap immediately glares at Tony judgmentally, to which Tony responds in clearly "oh-come-on" tone with, "There are conventions, all right? You meet people. I didn't sell him anything."
  • Clint and Natasha once again proving they've Seen It All by Clint casually bouncing home improvement ideas off of Natasha as they're driving to escape a city about to plunge thousands of feet to the ground.
  • When Natasha prepares to transfer the cradle while in mid-air to the quinjet, Barton positions the jet to get ready to receive it:
    Natasha: Get ready I'm sending the package to you.
    Barton: How do you want me to take it?
    Natasha: Umm, You might wish you hadn't asked that.
    • It involves Widow shoving the cradle into midair, and right into the Quinjet's rear hatch. Double Entendre nothing...
  • Stark discusses what he might do as he leaves the team at the end.
    Tony: Maybe I'll take a page out of Barton's book, build Pepper a farm. [beat] Hope nobody blows it up...
  • The film ends with Cap and his new team of Avengers together for the first time. What happens when he sounds the battle cry?
    Captain America: Avengers A—
    [cut to credits]
    • If there was ever a moment that proved Joss Whedon is trolling the fanbase...
      • Better yet, Whedon wanted this movie to be a minute shorter than the first. Every second counts, apparently!
  • There is something subtly amusing about newborn Vision giving Thor a sideways look, and then silently forming a Badass Cape of his own, clearly having thought that it looks good enough on Thor that he should try it too.

     Trailers and Pre-Release 
  • When the first trailer for Age of Ultron got leaked online, Marvel tweeted this in response. Evil Is Petty indeed.
  • Bilingual Bonus — Wanda and Pietro are not Slavic names but Sokovia is — hilariously so. Sokovia would be the English spelling of Sokovija, meaning land of Sokovi. Sokovi means "juices" and so Sokovia is "the land of juices".
  • A pretty sly Shout-Out with Nick Fury's cameo: he's got his eyepatch back and is wearing a black beanie cap. Demoman confirmed for Avengers?
  • The very fact that Hawkeye owns a farm. If you're a fan of Black Comedy, finding out that Hawkeye bought a farm is even more worthy of a snicker considering who is heading up this film...
  • A meta example: fans have joked that Disney convinced Marvel to join them just by describing the awesomeness of Ultron + a creepy rendition of "I've Got No Strings".
    • So then someone photoshopped Ultron into the album art of *NSYNC's No Strings Attached, the other most famous reference to "no strings". And then someone replaced the trailer's music with the song in particular.
  • Anthony Mackie is so happy to be on the poster.
  • The mood behind-the-scenes is really happy.
  • Rhodey's brand-new War Machine 2.0 armor is just a recolored Iron Patriot suit, or rather, the Iron Patriot paint job was the Air Force's doing.

     Meta 
  • The gag reel:
    • The big, tough looking Thor in the middle of a battle suddenly screeching, "HELP ME!"
    • Cap loves to troll with us just as much as Joss does.
    Cap: Avengers.... [points at the camera] Ahhhh...I didn't say...
    Widow: [whilst jumping behind him] Assemble!
    Selvig: [walking down university steps whilst talking to a student] I'll see you at 8. [beat] Bring your swimsuit.
    (Take Two)
    Selvig: I'll see you at 8. [beat] Bring your sister.
    (Take Three)
    Selvig: I'll see you at 8. [beat] No need to bring your mother this time.
    Fury: Hulk just jacked Ultron's ride. [orders Nat to the deck]
    Natasha: Why am I going over here?
    Fury: To... see him on the thing.
    Natasha: But why would I do that?
    Fury: And tell him: "don't be going all stealth mode, muthaf***a, we can't see you."
    • The end of the gag reel where Hulk jumps into the air to board the Quinjet Ultron is in...and doesn't make it.
  • When Natasha says traitor, she means traitor.
  • Quicksilver's death. While it isn't really funny his last words to Hawkeye ("You didn't see that coming.") are funny on meta level when you realise that most of the internet was convinced that Hawkeye was going to die in this movie after some comments from Joss Whedon.
  • One of James Spader's more notable roles prior to this movie was Robert California. This led some people to replace Ultron's dialogue with quotes from Robert California, like this.

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