Funny / Ambition of the Red Princess

• The Establishing Series Moment, that is what Malty thinks when she sees her father snubbing Naofumi after the summoning:
  Oh.
  Well, there goes the idea of getting the Shield Hero on Melromarc's side.
  Is he going senile?
  No, seriously. IS FATHER GOING SENILE?
  • She confirms said opinion, and more, when her father springs on her the plan to frame Naofumi for rape.
• Malty spying on the Heroes... And quickly concluding Naofumi is the only sane one.
• When Malty and Naofumi visit Elhart's shop, the blacksmith tries to convince Malty to take a practical armor rather than her canonical stomach-exposing and form-fitting ivory breastplate, and she blurts out that way she would "look like a dirty commoner". Cue her desperate attempt at backpedaling from that.
  • In the end, Elhart convinces Naofumi to buy Malty the leather armor and a helmet. Malty starts considering that he is the demon the Three Heroes Church was trying to warn everyone about.
• The way Malty's narration describes the Orange Balloon attached to Naofumi crotch under his cloak.
• Malty trying to make sense, and eventually giving up, on Naofumi using terminology from our world.
  "Shame we can't keep them like Pokemon." He remarks using another unfamiliar term.
  Mein wisely decides to ignore the comment.
  • This specific comment becomes much funnier when Naofumi actually figures out how to do just that.
• Possibly unintended, but Malty finding a common connection with Naofumi when he sees through an innkeeper offering a round to "celebrate" the presence of the Four Heroes remains quite amusing.
• Malty scouting the other Heroes to see which one attach herself to once she betrays Naofumi:
  • First she goes investigating Motoyasu... By talking to one of his drunken companions, who knows her. After the scouting, she decides to pass him over because she doesn't want to micromanage him.
  • Then she goes to Ren. It goes so badly that the Sword Heroes' companions pity her.
  • Finally she goes to Itsuki. It goes well... Then he suddenly has a fanatical outburst about being finally able to become a hero for justice that leaves the poor princess in Stunned Silence for minutes.
    "Are you okay, Miss Mein? Your face look a little... funny."
    Mein is standing still as a statue, her face caught in an expression somewhere between enlightenment and mind numbing terror. She tries to speak and after a while of her mouth uselessly flapping open and closed with nary a sound coming out she finally manages to regain her voice.
  • Meta: a reviewer asked if Itsuki had been saved by a holder of One For All.
  • In the end, Malty has to push herself to not get in her bed in a Troubled Fetal Position and cry herself to sleep. And she actually considers sticking with Naofumi: because of the other three Itsuki was the best bet, and risking to get dragged to hell with Naofumi if the queen didn't come back in time to put her father and the pope in their place may still be better than dealing with his insanity.
• Naofumi's "trial" has a few moments:
  • Malty finds herself sympathizing with Naofumi and his situation. What does she thinks to steer herself on the path of her father's plan?
    La, la, la, la, la~ Not thinking about it!
  • In the end, Malty does clear Naofumi. The description of the general reaction is priceless:
    For a brief moment, the throne room falls deathly silent. Father, his advisers, the Spear Hero and the soldiers who have Naofumi pinned to his knees all have their jaws hit the floor. The gathered nobles begin to whisper quietly amongst themselves, decorum be damned.
  • Motoyasu going from rabidly shouting at Naofumi and being ready to murder him to supporting him as if he had been on his side the whole time once Malty clears him.
  • The king finding himself on the accused's side is amusing enough, but the worst accuse in Motoyasu's eyes (and the obvious reaction) takes the cake:
    "Yeah! And you made Mein cry! That's the worst offense here!" The Spear Hero also hops forward to yell at father. The Sword and Bow heroes both give the clueless fool a very distant and disdainful look.
    "Kitamura-San. You should apologize to Iwatani-san." The Bow Hero says as he squeezes the bridge of his nose.
    "What!? Why? I didn't do anything!" The Spear Hero jumps on his feet, he looks very surprised by this suggestion.
    Mein wonders if the Spear Hero was simply born this way, or if he has to work very hard to become this stupid. Perhaps he was dropped on his head when he was little?
    "You obviously believed him guilty even before Mein showed up." The Bow Hero explains slowly, as if talking to a particularly dense child. Meanwhile the Sword Hero lets out a tired sigh. He mumbles something about needing a proper vacation rather than this. He certainly looks like he wants to ask for a day off after this joke of a trial, even when he was not the one accused.
    [...]
    The Bow Hero is still caught in a back and forth argument with the Spear wielding blond idiot. If the face of the 'Ally of Justice' is any indication then it looks like the longer the Bow Hero talks to the Spear Hero the more he is considering joining the Sword Hero on his vacation. "Just apologize to Iwatani-san. You don't want Mein to hate you, do you?" It seems like after a while the Bow Hero finally finds the correct button to push when dealing with the idiotic skirt chaser.
    The Spear Hero looks back at Mein. The undercover princess pulls her hands off her face to give him her best pleading puppy dog eyes, eyes that are still full of tears. "Okay! Alright. I'm sorry for not believing in you..." He finally gives out with a huff, crossing his arms over his chest and turning his head away petulantly. He wasn't even speaking to Naofumi, but rather to the air next to him.
    • What Malty believes makes the Shield Hero really dangerous: he's adorable.
  • Later that day, Motoyasu invites Naofumi and Malty to drink with his party... And gets bitten by one of the balloons under Naofumi's cloak. The scene (and Itsuki "saving" him) has to read. And then, there's Motoyasu complaining that everyone is treating him like an idiot for what has happened:
  "So that's how it is…" He speaks in quiet and somber tone. "Summoned to another world against my will. Abandoned by all of my so allies. Left behind by a cute girl in favor of someone else and falsely accused when I am the real victim…"
  The Spear wielding drama queen picks up a clay mug standing in front of him and slowly moves it up to his mouth. He seems to stare into it, lost to the outside world. After several seconds he suddenly chugs down the contents in one go and slams it back down on the table. He somehow looks even more depressed now.
  "…Even the once delicious food and drink have lost their taste. This world, it's completely drained of flavor now…" Mein can feel her eye starting to twitch again.
  After a second the Bow Hero angrily stands up and snatches the mug away from where the Spear Clown left it. He takes a nearby water pitcher and refills it, letting out a frustrated sigh.
  "That's because it was water! And it wasn't even yours!"

  • The above is taken up to eleven in that said complaint by Motoyasu is in actuality a summation of the entire Trauma Conga Line that Canon-Naofumi experienced after being summoned to Melromarc in the first place.
• The Heroes discussing which of them would be the protagonist if they were in a light novel. Naofumi, obviously, wouldn't be.
• Every time Malty learns something about Naofumi's backstory or world... And, not knowing the context, immediately takes a logical but completely wrong conclusion:
  • Naofumi mentions he's used to sleep on the ground, referring to the futon. Not knowing about it, Malty immediately thinks he grew up similar to Cinderella (mentioned by name by Naofumi when he denies)... And grows protective.
    "Oh, Master Naofumi… I am so, so sorry. You will never have to put up with something so horrible ever again while I am with you…" Those monsters! How dare they mistreat such a sweet and innocent boy like that!? No wonder he grew up reclusive.
    The fact that Mein was only that morning considering the possibility of framing said sweet and innocent boy for rape, was conveniently ignored.
  • Malty finds out Naofumi's faulty information on her world comes from a book. She immediately guesses the Heroes' worlds have sacred texts to inform potential Heroes about the worlds they may be summoned to defend, Naofumi read the book of an heretic sect, and there were wars of religion about that.
  • An offhand comment by Naofumi causes Malty to think his people bathe themselves with the feces of some kind of monster called Sham. Naofumi has to quickly explain what shampoo actually is.
• Malty's first attempt at seducing Naofumi fails... Because he forgot to pop one of the Balloons. And then everyone else at the Inn, including the other Heroes come to the rescue.
  Needless to say, after that incident more awful rumors popped up, regarding the Shield Hero and his female companion… and their apparent attempts at using monsters to diversify their love life.
  • Later it seems a female Siltvelt agent is about to throw herself at Naofumi... And Malty already anticipates the same happening to her, before Naofumi stops her.
  • Malty's utter terror of the things due to the experience, and the commentary that comes out of it once in a while.
• As she's coming back to the camp from selling their loot, Malty hears fighting noises and strange shouts coming from it. Imagining a number of bad scenarios, Malty comes to the rescue... And finds Naofumi using the round red, white and blue shield he unlocked the previous day to play Captain America. Badly.
  Mein slowly lowers and sheathes her sword while straightening from her fencing stance. Once both of her hands are free she lifts them to her face and lets her head fall into them.
• Naofumi's epic Entertainingly Wrong moment, in which, from the exchanges between Malty and two low-level Siltvelt spies, he concludes that the "Wise King" Aultclay and the Queen are a couple of Magnificent Bastards who summoned all the Heroes in order to stave off a Siltvelt invasion that they couldn't hope to fight off, by effectively taking the entire world hostage in order to force the stronger countries to keep Siltvelt down, with the Queen being at the conference for the sake of Plausible Deniability – rather than a moment of spite from a bitter old man with too much power. And it makes enough sense that Malty starts believing it to be the case.
  • The royal spymaster's reaction when he's shown a recording of Naofumi's reasoning.
• After Beloukas describes the Rabbit people, Naofumi compares them to the Viera of Ivalice. Somehow, Lady Viera of the Rabbit People was a companion of the first Shield Hero. It also goes to confirm Malty's guess about the sacred texts.
  • She's not the only odd name: the slaves Naofumi takes in alongside Raphtalia are a fanatic Ax-Crazy lizardman named Lautrec, and a friendly but unexpressive rabbit man named Kyubey. After Viera and Lautrec turned out to be Meaningful Names, Naofumi is obviously spooked at the latter.
    • And later, it turns out he's actually named after a past Shield Hero – thus his name is actually Kyubei...
• Malty choose to have her alias Mein hail from Samphor, because it's completely out of way and nobody would care. So, of course, Naofumi asks her a very precise question about her supposed hometown, and one she actually needs to answer truthfully.
  • And later Ren and Itsuki meet Mein of Samphor, the adventurer. As in, an actual adventurer named Mein who hails from Samphor, complete with red hair and green eyes. And apparently, her mother got her name from a trashy novel...
• Malty's sadistic commentary of the sealing of the Orange Balloons – and then it turning into horror when the Balloons show affection to him the way that dogs do, and she convinces herself they're already breaking free.
  • To calm it down, Naofumi tells it he'll give it some meat of a rabbit previously captured... In the presence of newly acquired rabbit man Kyubey. Naofumi didn't do it on purpose... But Malty does nothing to explain Kyubey that, no, Naofumi won't feed him to the Balloon if he doesn't behave.
  • And when it comes to feed a sick Raphtalia, Naofumi mentions he has some rabbit pill jerky.
• The non-canon omake where Malty is right about the Balloons.
• Lautrec and the tamed Balloons trying to help Naofumi convince an innkeeper that they're harmless.
  • Mein's opinion on said innkeeper and his reaction to Raphtalia.
    Deidric's eyes visibly widen in shock and pity and he raises a hand to cover his mouth. Mein on the other hand has no sympathy towards this innkeeper who is currently standing between her empty stomach and a nice warm meal. She simply pushes Raphtalia to the front of the lobby to let Deidric have a good look at the still more than a little sickly looking demi-human child.
• When it comes to outfit the new members of the party, the group has some trouble with the armors:
  • Raphtalia is given an armor similar to Malty's, only in the smallest size available... which is still far too large for the poor raccoon girl.
  • Elhard proposes to Naofumi to switch to the Barbarian Armor from canon, but Malty objects on account it would make him look like a bandit leader, and gets reprimanded for thinking more about looks than anything. She explains that her reasons are actually that in a Wave he'd risk being attacked by knights too much on-edge to recognize the Shield Hero, especially as the design is originally from Siltvelt... But the narration admits Elhard was right, at least for the main reason.
  • With himself and the girls outfitted, Naofumi now has a spare set of mail to give to either Lautrec or Kyubey... And Lautrec makes his opinion known:
    "You can let the grass muncher have his armor. My goddess will watch over me, her embrace is my shroud. She'll not let me be killed by a stray arrow, or the maw of monsters."
    The only response Naofumi dignify the lizard with is to slowly edging away from the deranged reptile. Mein honestly can't blame her Naofumi in this case, as she too begin to slowly put the counter between herself and Lautrec in an effort to shield herself.
  • The general reaction at Naofumi's cooking.
    • Raphtalia mistakenly thinking she ate Balloon Monsters due Naofumi naming his trio after the pomelo fruit and putting the actual fruit in the dish.
    • Malty deciding Naofumi lied about the Balloons' names to not scare Raphtalia with their true horrifying names.
  • The king's reaction when he's told a rather abridged version of Malty's misadventures with the Balloons.
• Naofumi buying things... From a merchant Malty extorted that very morning. You can guess how it goes...
• The identities of the Sword, Spear, Bow, and Shield Heroes of the previous generation: Kirigaya Kazuto, Itou Makoto, Emiya Shirou, and Mikami Mikage (AKA the King of Rape). For obvious reasons, the only one Naofumi doesn't recognize is his own predecessor.
• Malty's horror when she thinks Naofumi is a Filorial fetishist like her mother, her sister... And herself, no matter how much she tries to deny it.
• There's something incredibly funny in Gaston praising someone as a better hunter than himself.
• Malty's costume for a celebratory banquet causes two other noblewomen to try to get similar costumes commissioned for themselves, thinking they'd be like superheroes in such outfits.
• Malty not knowing the name of one of Amelia's bodyguards, so she chooses to call the bodyguard she recognizes as "Henchman number 2".
  • By Chapter 30, Malty later learns the name of Henchmen number 2 being, Dida.
• Ancient magic tomes are akin to philosophy texts, and the Grimoire of Water exposes the idea of non-violence. After reading its initial passages, Malty tries and envisions how its Fire counterpart would start... And she envisions the Sith Code.
  Peace is a lie. There is only passion. Through Passion I gain Strength. Through Strength I gain Power. Through Power I gain Victory. Through Victory my chains are Broken.
  Yeah, that feels about right.
  • Seeing that Malty is acting somewhat strange while reading the Grimoire, Naofumi, knowing it came from Lucius Malfoy himself, asks her if she saw words suddenly appearing in it or started hearing voices. Malty is quite surprised by how well versed Naofumi is on demonic and outside influences.
• Everything about Zylden Von Balveproven, the Imp of Casterly Rock, and his boasts about being "the greatest behind the door lover you'll find this side of Medea". Plus, the adults' reaction at his antics:
  Mein quickly covers Raphtalia's ears. The words spewing out of the imp's ear isn't fitting for a young lady.
• In a rather dark way, Malty's suggestion that Raphtalia survived her previous owner because the queen was using her as a Honey Trap of sorts for Naofumi. Even Malty thinks the idea is utterly ludicrous and such a plan would be as ill-conceived as her father's False Rape Accusation. An earlier chapter confirms that was indeed Mirellia's plan.
• In Burden's Rest, Gaston brings Naofumi and his party to the inn of his old friend... LeFou. Who alludes to something that happened between Gaston and a girl named Belle before Gaston interrupts him.
• Gaelion sheepishly admitting that Wyndia didn't go to see her friend, more rather he forbade her and she snuck out. Both Ren and Naofumi point out how that's a basic pitfall of parenting, forbidding a child from doing something will make them want to do it more.
• During her duel against Eclair, Weiss Schnee uses a spell to lighten her body and increase her jumping ability. During one such leap, she strikes a dramatic pose... only for Eclair to grab her by the face and choke slam her into the ground.
• Malty's mental rant after a single look at Cattleya's gigantic breasts.
• Upon learning that rubbing a demihuman's animal traits is generally only done by parents or lovers, Naofumi nearly falls down the stairs in his shock.
• When they meet at Balafon village, Motoyasu gloating at Naofumi, affirming the superiority of his two Filorials over Filo while Naofumi tries to point out they're not rivals... And then, Filo kicks Motoyasu in the groin.
  • Later in the chapter, Motoyasu continues strangling his wounded crotch in the bandages.
• Naofumi tries to understand how the Life Root grew so fast, only for Motoyasu to brush it off as "magic", causing Naofumi to remark that he clearly failed grade school.
  Motoyasu: I'll have you know I only started failing my life science tests in high school!
  Naofumi: And you are PROUD of this, because?!
• How Malty and Raphtalia learn that Filo has turned into a proper Monarch Filorial:
  That's when they, and probably a number of other people heard what can only be described as a pained scream of pure despair and agony from Shield Hero. It's fit for a man who just found out he murdered his wife and unborn child in a fit of cursed wrath.
  
  "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
  
  Both the princess and the demi-human child turn around as fast as they could. A number of Balafon farmers, Whiterun and Claes guardsmen, the Spear Hero and his companions are already running towards inside the village palisade. Mein and Raphtalia half hop, half dash their way into the village and push their way through the gathered people. They find Naofumi currently lying on the ground in a fetal position while hammering the earth. "My chocobo turned into a giant rubber DUCKY !"
  
  The princess turns her head up to take a good look at what her Naofumi is currently groveling about. She has to spend a moment to pause at what she sees. Firo, Wolfgang, and the four birds brought along by the Spear Hero all look much bigger... and fatter from the night before. Even their elongated neck is no longer visible, as their heads look like a fluffy stump propped over their puffy, spherical bodies that can easily fit two, maybe three adult men inside.
• During their travel to the former Seatto lands, Naofumi and his party set to camp for the night, with a party of a noble child and her four escorts camping nearby. Mein doesn't have much trouble... Up until she recognizes her sister. Malty's horror at everything that follows has to be read.
  • When day comes, Naofumi and his party leave... Then they notice that Melty hid inside Filo.
    • Malty's attempt to get rid of Melty... By telling her where Motoyasu is and that he'd gladly raise a dozen Monarch Filorials for her. Too bad Melty can get Filorials any time she wants, but going on an adventure with her is a one-in-a-lifetime occasion...
• During the battle with the Bitch Lord, she starts hurling threats... Then Naofumi starts slamming her with a stone shield. That is just irritating, but then Naofumi grabs her arm with a club prothesis and uses that to smack her into unconsciousness (the club uses the Bitch Lord's own attack rating).
• At the end of the Third Wave, Lautrec returns and summons his goddess, that is the web novel version of Raphtalia, who, quite understandably, wants Malty dead... And has to deal with her local counterpart defending her and revealing how exactly she considers Malty:
  The dimensional invader seems to freeze for a brief moment, before she grabs Raphtalia's sword and throws her away like an afterthought. Raphtalia lands on the ground with a roll, and she bounces right back at the goddess. "I'm not losing another Mother of mine to you damn WAVE!"
  
  "What?!" The goddess actually seems completely shocked at Raphtalia's reaction, as she simply stands in the open without doing anything.
• Right before the apex of the Three Heroes Church arc, Sigmar Conservatie corners Naofumi and his remaining companions, and, thinking himself invincible, he doesn't relent even after the other Heroes come to the rescue, and instead charges at them. Motoyasu drops the flat of his spear on his head, spanks him, and ties him to a tree.
  • After Balmus shows up and engages the Heroes himself while declaring his philosophy, Sigmar starts cheering for him, also declaring that soon enough he'll kill Balmus himself. Balmus calmly walks to the tree and takes from him the artifact that was making him immortal.

---