Police officers have to treasure those moments when things take a turn for the absurd.
- In one episode, The guys try everything to rid the unit of a nasty smell, but it keeps getting worse. Originally it was a perfume spill but air freshener and gasoline got mixed in as they try desperately to cover it up.
- In the episode "Training Wheels," Officer Wells suggests having several officers impersonate paperboys using unclaimed bicycles to try to trap a group of car strippers. Wells gets the short end of the stick several times: first, he arrives late at the beginning of the tour and winds up with a girls bike; then, he's yelled at by an irate newspaper customer (after Malloy tells her that Wells is her paperboy); and lastly, the bike he's riding is wrecked when capturing the car strippers. The look on the little girl's face when he tries to explain how her bike got wrecked is priceless.
- The trouble with The Alleged Car in "Beast", in an it-wasn't-funny-at-the-time sort of way.
- Speaking of The Alleged Car, a pair of drug dealers' choice of hiding place fails in a Dumb Crook Story kind of way: they hid the heroin in the gas tank—and a bag ruptured. Heroin + Engine = Kaput.
- In another episode, a burglar raids a synagogue, but is going to have some trouble fencing the typewriter, which is designed solely for Hebrew.
- In one of the airport episodes, a thief picks the pocket of a Marine bound for Okinawa and tells Reed and Malloy it's his own money for Chicago—not realizing the Marine has already changed his money into yen.
- A drug dealer tries to dry his pot in a laundromat dryer.