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The Negima! forum thread gets up to some some interesting hijinks when it's waiting for the latest chapter to come out. Some of the weirdness has been preserved here for posterity. We now have a dedicated forum thread for all the fanfiction.

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     Manga/Negima characters as characters in other movies 

  • Monty Python and the Holy Grail
    • Arthur: Negi
    • Lancelot: Kotaro
    • Galahad: Setsuna
    • Bedivere: Chao
    • Robin: Misora
    • Sir Not Appearing In This Picture: Nagi
    • Every girl in Castle Anthrax: Konoka, possibly Tsukuyomi
    • The Black Beast: The High Dragon
    • Tim the Enchanter: Albireo
    • The Killer Rabbit: Tsukuyomi
    • The Old Man from the bridge: Konoemon
    • The Black Beast of AAAARRRGGGHHH: Sukuna
  • Star Wars
    • Luke: Negi, Nagi
    • Han: Haruna, Kotaro
    • Leia: Asuna
    • C-3PO: Chamo
    • R2-D2: Chachamaru?
    • Lando: Albireo
    • Darth Vader: Chao, Negi
    • Palpatine: Dynamis
    • Obi Wan: Rakan, Takamichi
    • All the ewoks: Anya
    • General Tarkin: Fate, Godel,
    • Jabba: ...Tohsaka?
    • Yoda: Evangeline, Albireo
  • Lord of the Rings
    • Frodo: Negi.
    • Sam: Satsuki.
    • Gandalf: Konoemon.
    • Aragorn: Takamichi.
    • Pippin: Fuuka.
    • Merry: Fumika.
    • Boromir: Godel.
    • Legolas: Setsuna.
    • Gimli: Kotaro.
    • Gollum: Chachazero. I thought of Chamo, but he's too silly to be actually creepy.
    • Eowyn: Asuna.
    • Elrond: Eishun.
    • Saruman: Geez, tough one. Dynamis is the closest one I can think of now.
    • Arwen: Shizuna.
    • Grima: Chigusa.

     'Twas the Night Before Christmas 
'''Started By Radical Taoist, contributions by Japanese Teeth, RedSavant, SC Mof 2814,

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring - 'cept for Chamo, that louse
Through the underwear drawer he rummaged with care
Checking over his shoulder that Asuna wasn't there.

That girl was snuggled up in her bed,
while visions of senseis danced in her head.
Negi curled up beside her, wearing his cap,
and Konoka beneath them, in her blanket wrapped.

When o'er at the door there came a sharp knock
"Stupid brat, since when does he keep the door locked?"
It was Eva, who knows why, dressed up all in red
With Chachamaru behind her, piloting her sled.

The moon shone on her breasts covered by snow
which her hot, red, furred bikini did show.
With her Chisame sat, in similar gear.
"Stupid vampire!" she cried. "I'm freezing over here!"

Ignoring the hacker, with an act deft and quick
Eva did tug, and the two sleepers did fall to the floor like a brick!
"OW!" cried Asuna, pissed as they came,
"What the hell, Eva!" she pointed in blame.

("This is just stupid, " Chisame ground out;
"You won't even tell me what this is about?"
So saying, she got out and just left the poem.
"Screw you guys, " she muttered. "I'm gonna go home.")

"Shut up, you brats!" Eva said while Konoka awakened,
her visions of naked Setsunas sadly broken.
"We have a summons, a contact, a call!
It says, 'do a Christmas special!', signed from Beyond the Fourth Wall."

"What the hell does that mean?" Asuna asked, in a rage did she fly.
"I was getting my sleep, for this day did me try!"
With an angry harrumph, such a Naru V2,
The girl drew out her sword, and so did hilarity ensue!

The cry from the mouth of the just-woken lass
Rang with volume as through the dorm halls it did pass.
When, who of that wandering yell should overhear,
But the rest of 3-A, every classmate and peer.

A few rooms away, keyboard clickety-clacking,
Sat Chisame, annoyed at the views she was lacking.
The shout startled her, made her cancel her edit,
Which caused a huge backlash on 2ch and Reddit.

The ninja involved, Narutakis plus one,
Decided immediately to go have some fun.
'Was that Santa?' Fuuka wondered, disbelief cast into doubt,
So Kaede suggested they go and find out.

Across the dorms' courtyard, through snow gently falling,
Went Asuna's shout, not-so-quietly-calling.
Makie fell out of bed, softly whimpered in pain,
Forgot her dream - some little white thing called Brain...?

Now, in Kazumi's room (you can probably guess),
Slept our Sayo, curled up between Kazumi's breasts.
The shout woke her quickly, more quickly than most,
And she shivered in fear of some mean Grinchy ghost.

     101 Negima Fic Ideas Thread Game. 
Started by Radical Taoist, contributions added by Ack Sed, D Omen, Huilisti, Japanese Teeth, Marq FJA, Medinoc, mega-dark, Over Master/Napoleon De Cheese, Neep, Raso, RedSavant and Watchtower. Forum thread for all the fic.
  • 1. Mahou Effect: the adventures of a young Negi Shepard, talented biotic and son of the legendary first human Spectre. Fusion, heavily adapting the plot of the existing games and assuming a very Renegade Nagi Shepard.
  • 2. Big Eyes Small Mage: five friends decide to run a Big Eyes, Small Mouth game set in a high school. This is just stealing the concept from Darths & Droids, not actually a true crossover.
  • 3. Mahou Sensei Anya: the magic school back in Wales makes a fuckup, and Anya gets sent to Mahora instead of Negi. Negi still has to learn how to become a powerful fortune teller and find his dad while Anya becomes a strong adventurer in her own right. (I think we talked about this idea in the thread before, but it was such a good idea I'm glad to plug it twice.)(Claimed by Sereg, Now with a trope page)
  • 4. Negi was not unharmed by the attack on his home village, but instead was disfigured horribly. There's a cute little boy under the scarred face and the limp, but it's hard to find. He doesn't exactly encourage it; rather than a cheerful young gentleman, he's become a sardonic and bitter young man with little motivation other than a grim mission to find his father. On the plus side, he's much better at intimidating some discipline into his class.
  • 5. Cosmo Entelecheia tries to catch flies with honey rather than vinegar, attempting to recruit Negi to their cause much earlier in the storyline. Negi thus ends up on Fate's side at first.
  • 6. Mahou Custodian Negima: Negi was sent to Mahora on his first magic be the school janitor.
  • 7. Mahora Taisen: a horde of demons led by Graf Hermann and powered by dark magic tries to take over Japan. The only ones who can stop them are a group of 31 middle schoolers from class 3A, five of which have enough magic power of their own to control combat mobile suits built by Hakase. Coming to their aid is Negi Springfield, a newly recruited ten years-old with an incredible, almost royal-like amount of magic power inside himself.
  • 8. Dodgeball Sensei Negima!: after the graduation of class 3A, the girls decide to take over campus Ursula's dodgeball team. Negi accepts to train them with the ultimate goal of reaching the dodgeball world finals in Istanbul, where he hopes to find his father (no clue why he would need such an occasion to get there).
  • 9. Mahora Gyakuten: a change in the laws of the Magic World causes Chamo to lose diplomatic protection over his many supposed crimes. Kurt Godel himself takes up the case to get the ermine a guilty verdict; now only Chamo's lifelong protector, Negi, can defend him and prove his innocence! (also starring Konoemon as the Judge)
  • 10. Inugami: Kotaro falls in a well and ends up in the Sengoku Jidai, where he frees a girl bound to a tree by a magic arrow. She turns out to be Natsumi's ancestor; they embark on an epic journey to stop an evil loli vampire (yeah, according to canon, Eva already existed back then, so why not?) from collecting a powerful wish-granting jewel.
  • 11. NegimaHolic: Genderswap Asuna and Negi. ONLY Asuna and Negi. See how long you can keep a crossdresser's facade going - hell, "do they know she's a he?" could be as important a question as "are they in on The Masquerade?".
  • 12. In a similar vein, Negi comes to school in possession of age changing magic and starts using it from the beginning, convinced that his class won't listen to him unless they think he's twenty-four years old. Keeping the secret of his actual age adds tons of complications, especially given what the class thinks of their cute but oddly childlike new teacher.
  • 13. ×××HOLiC Negima: Negi Watanuki in place of Kimihiro Watanuki. Make any other changes necessary, but keep "Yuuko Ichihara" as she is (do not even swap her with Evangeline). 'Nuff said.
  • 14. Chamo's Adventures in the Magical World. We don't know a thing about what he did there. Did he touch base with his ermine cousins? Pay his bail with the thousands of ermine dollars he has accumulated? Is he part of an ermine yakuza? Go wild.
  • 15. In this world, the Potterverse and the Magical World are two separate coexisting things. Japan has, up until recently, been isolationist and quite successful at hiding the extent of its holdings in the MW. Negi, as the son of the Thousand Master, saviour of the MW and part of the oldest royal family, is sent as an ambassador to the wizarding world in an effort to open relations and enlist help with the reconstruction effort. One problem - this is Rational!Harry, he of the bulging brain, scientific arrogance and budding dark side. It should be fun to see him pop a vein when Negi arrives with his entourage. :-) (Claimed by Ack Sed)
  • 16: Mahou Tsukaima Negima: Negi is accidentally summoned in instead of Saito. How would Louise and everyone else react to a familiar who is better as magic than herself? Bonus points if it's Demon!Negi who is summoned. Claimed by I Am Not Creative Enough, as "Darkest Void".
  • 17. Upon arriving at Mahora Academy, the first and only thing Negi Springfield saw was a charred wasteland. Smoking ruins stood everywhere, all around the World Tree, the only thing left untouched at the whole area. And when he called out for someone, the only reply he got was the silence of the dead. Only a ghost came to greet him. A confused, traumatized soul who barely could describe the onslaught that had just happened. Now, while attempting to heal her shattered mind, Negi starts travelling into the deep and seedy underground of Japan's darkest parts of the magical community, trying to find the supposed kidnapped survivors of his intended class, 2-A.
  • 18. Child prodigy Negi Springfield never believed magic could be real until he was assigned to teach at the Magical School of Mahora Academy, where he learned he would have to room with the completely sorcery-inept Kagurazaka Asuna (who for some reason barely can perform any magic at all). Can a completely normal human boy manage to handle a class full of students well versed about the world of magic? (Claimed By Sianistic)
  • 19. Super Mahora Bros: princess Asuna is kidnapped by the evil Fate. Negi and Kotaro team up and storm a castle to save her (wait for it...). It turns out she's in another castle.
  • 20. Tengen Toppa Magister Magi: in this universe, humanity has been forced to live underground for centuries by the evil beastmen, led by their mysterious ruler Zazie. Negi is a boy living in a small village in underground Wales; after losing his parents years ago, the only one he believes in is his "brother" Jack Rakan. One day, he finds a small magic-powered mecha, which he and Jack use to defeat a beastman and reach the surface. They then decide to start a revolution against them, and recruit the many fellows they meet during their journey in what they call the Ala Alba Brigade. Will they be able to pierce the heavens? Also starring Chamo as Boota (duh), Kotaro as Viral, Chigusa Amagasaki as Adiane and Cosmo Enchilada as the Anti-Spirals.
  • 21. Bishoujo Mahora Student Sailor Moon: Book dumb, love-crazy (about older men) Kagurazaka Asuna meets a talking ermine named Chamo who charges her with the powers of a magical superheroine, Sailor Moon! Eventually teaming up with shy and smart Nodoka (Sailor Mercury), serious and stern Mana (Sailor Mars), tall and strong Kaede (Sailor Jupiter), flirty (but only with children) Ayaka (Sailor Venus), elegant and refined Konoka (Sailor Neptune), silent and proud Setsuna (Sailor Uranus), quiet and beautiful Chizuru (Sailor Pluto), and the mysterious Zazie (Sailor Saturn), they battle the evil forces from beyond with the aid of the enigmatic Black Rose Baron!
  • 23. Negimon: On the day of his tenth birthday, Negi Springfield from Merdiana Town sets out to become a Magimon Master like his legendary father. His lifelong friend Konoka had gotten a Setsuna crane from her grandfather, Professor Konoemon, but by the time Negi arrives to the Professor's lab, the only Magimon left is a rebellious little boar named Asuna. After saying goodbye to his sister, Negi sets out on his way with Asuna to become the next Thousand Magimon Master. Along the way, they wreck the bike of a girl named Anya, who battles along with her aquatic Magimon Akira, and they start following them around. Soon, they stumble into the evil but bumbling Team Decopin Rocket (Madoka, Misa, and talking kitten Sakurako), a gang of Magimon thieves intended upon stealing Asuna away.
  • 24. Negi no Maid Guy. Fujiwara Konoka is a normal girl trying to lead a normal life with her schlubby younger brother. Unfortunately, she's the first in line to inherit her grandfather's billions - and that means she's first in line on a lot of hit lists. Fortunately, Fujiwara Konoemon sends two servants to protect his darling grandchildren — Chizuru, the consummate maid... and Kogarakan, the burly, dress-wearing Maid Guy.
  • 25. Detective Negi: Nagi Springfield is a famous high-school detective who has solved numerous cases. One day, when he is in an amusement park with his childhood friend, Anya Cocolova, he witnesses a crime committed by two men in black. They see him, knock him out and try to kill him with a new poison they have developed. Fortunately, Nagi doesn't die, but the poison turns him into a ten-year-old kid! Now, the shrunken detective Negi must find the mysterious organization, Cosmo Entelecheia, and return to his normal size without risking the lives of his friends.
  • 26. Negima 1/2: Idiot Hero Kung Fu Wizard Nagi had made a promise with his good ol' training buddy for an Arranged Marriage between their children, Negi and insert Negima girl here. Surely nothing can go wrong...
  • 27. Makie (sitting before a small cage placed on her nightstand): "Tell me, Brain-sama... What are we going to do tonight?"
    Mouse in the cage: "The same thing we do every night, Makie... Try to take over the world!"
    THEY'RE MAKIE, THEY'RE MAKIE AND THE BRAIN! (Link pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5 note )
  • 28. Negi hires the Leverage crew to take down the Megalomesembrian Senate and clear his name. (Claimed by Japanese Teeth)
  • 29. Mahorastuck. 4/13 happens while Negi is teaching at Mahora. Hijinx ensue.
  • 30. Not a crossover, per se: the American Chopper guys make a Negima-themed bike.
  • 31. ^Got the idea from this: Animaniacs, but Albireo, Rakan, and Haruna replace Yakko, Wakko, and Dot.
  • 32. Ranma's Relocation: The destruction involving Saffron reaches Dean Konoe's ears, and Negi is sent to Nerima to investigate. He quickly befriends Ranma, who tags along back to Mahora, to give his story and to get back at Negi. But this is Ranma we're talking about, so the madness is never too far away. (Claimed by Watchtower)
  • 33. Lupin vs. Kaito: Lupin has become aware of the Phantom Thief Kid's success, and challenges him to a series of contests around the globe. While competing in Britain, Lupin, his gang (including Fujiko, for the hell of it), and Kaito are all accidentally transported to the Magic World. With Zenigata, Nakamori, and Conan out of the picture, who can stop them?
  • 34. Ala Alba ends up on Mid-Childa on their way back from the Magical World. The unusual aspects of Negi and several of his companions (Negi's Magia Erebea, Asuna's Anti Magic, Kotaro and Setsuna's half-human nature, Konoka's massive magical capacity) attract attention from both Mid-Childa's criminal element and the upper echelons of the TSAB. Can Ala Alba save their friends, save the world, and finally get Konoka and Setsuna to hook up? (Claimed by Sinclair; Link)
  • 35. A strange man who looks suspiciously like Liam Neeson approaches Chisame and tells her that "the force is strong with her." Despite her misgivings, Yue and Nodoka use their artifacts to confirm that the man is indeed a Jedi Knight, who seeks to bring peace to the galaxy. At Ala Alba's urging, Chisame reluctantly begins Jedi training. (Claimed by No Limit)
  • 36. After completing his tenure at Mahora, Negi is transferred to Hogwarts to be the new Defense Against The Dark Arts teacher.
  • 37. At the urge of his new girlfriend Nodoka (hurr yeah), Negi sets out to find an ancient treasure buried on the tropical paradise of Pararakelse. As soon as he gets there though, he finds some serious competition in the form of Seta Noriyasu and Keitaro Urashima. Can he beat them to the punch?
  • 38. While executing her master plan to fix the world, Chao Linshen stumbles across an amazing piece of magical technology she never even dreamed of: a thin black notebook with the power to kill. Horrified, she wants nothing to do with it — but when she's approached both by the man who calls himself Kira and the world's greatest detective, L, which side will she finally decide is Justice?
  • 39. Following from #37, Keitaro comes to Mahora as a history professor, and Negi finally moves out of Asuna and Konoka's room into Keitaro and Naru's house. Hijinx ensue as Keitaro and Naru cope with all the magical weirdness that Negi brings upon their home.
  • 40. Louise attempts to summon her familiar... and ends up summoning Kotaro, who somehow both resents and appreciates the fact that she treats him like a dog. He uses his newfound Gandalfr abilities to attempt to return to Mahora, and defeat his rival once and for all.
  • 41. Negi and Kotaro after wandering the magical world for two months of Negi's one year vacation, find a unknown gate port and take it to the world of Midchilda. What Negi doesn't know is he'll be in the biggest tournament of his life, and find the two people he was searching for most of his life. (Claimed by Sinclair; Link)
  • 42. After defeating Fate and rescuing Mundus Magicus, Mars gets blown up by the Vogons. The infinite improbability drive miraculously rescues everyone in Negi's class, and kicks off an interstellar adventure as they search for a way to recreate Mundus Magicus.
  • 43. Obligatory Touhou crossover: Negi somehow ends up in Gensokyo, war breaks out as every female vies for his affection, while all he wants is to return to his own world.
  • 44. After being erased by the Code Of The Lifemaker, Jack Rakan finds himself in Soul Society. He decides to take the whole "Aizen" situation into his own hands. note 
  • 45. 25,000 years into the future, long after the era of Chao Linsghen, several experts and specialists gather together to discuss on the legends of Ala Rubra and Ala Alba and try to tell myth apart from actual history. Each one of them offers a different interpretation of the whole Negima saga, many of them bordering the surrealist, others being incredibly dry and cynical.
  • 46. After a hard battle fought all by himself, Negi returns to Mahora Academy only to be faced by a most shocking change. Now he must learn How Mahora Became A Nudist Colony.
  • 47. Early-manga Negi (~chapter 20 or so) is visited by Anya, who predicts the future events of the manga, to an increasingly skeptical audience.
  • 48. The inevitable "Negi finally hits puberty" fic. The girls realize that Negi is actually starting to enjoy it when they drag him into the bath... (link note )
  • 49. Akira is secretly a partial manifestation of AKIRA, his essence/potential randomly scattered throughout the multiverse after... that... happened at the end of the film. There are other Akiras - some friendly, some fearsome - and they are being drawn to her.
  • 50. Kaede, heir to the Koga ninja clan, must find a lineage master to pass on her techniques. Unfortunately, most of the good candidates are busy or taken. Thus she travels Japan searching for a worthy opponent in the hopes of finding a worthy pupil.
  • 51. Negi is nostalgic about the fairy tales Nekane used to tell him, so Asuna decides to try her hand at it. As she does it, however, the rest of 3-A can't help but nosing in adding their own twists to the tale. Get ready for poor flat Cinderella Natsumi suffering under the tyranic heel (and huge busts) of Stepmother Shizuna and Stepsisters Chizu-nee and Kazumi! The Big Bad Wolf Kotaro fights the Three Litle Cheerleader Pigs! Gepetto Hakase and Chachazerocchio! Jack Rakan and the Beanstalk! And more, in 'Negima's Twisted Fairy Tale Theater'! (Claimed by LoveIsWeird)
  • 52. Negima Basara: Negi's attempts at time-based magic go wrong, and the Ala Alba are accidentally transported to the Sengoku Era. But when did it get so... weird?
  • 53. What does Ken Akamatsu actually do during all those 'research break' weeks? Why, he actually researches the secret world of magic... firsthand! Join the star mangaka, his hot cosplayer wife, and his team of specialists (including Amagasaki Chigusa herself!) as they challenge the mysteries of the hidden world of magic every two weeks!
  • 54. Her plan screwed over by Negi the first time around, Chigusa returns, seeking revenge; she hired yet another assassin to target Negi. Her name: Golden Darkness. But it isn't long before all of Yami's friends from Rito's house follow her to Mahora, trying to convince her to abandon the life of an assassin. Will Lala and Mikan finally convince her to live a peaceful life? Will she fall for Negi's charms, like so many girls before her? Or will she overcome all odds to fulfill her mission?
  • 55. In Soviet Russia, magic casts you! A sentient magical spell begins to spread like a virus. Only Negi's planning and Asuna's Anti Magic can stop it.
  • 56. The Mahora Gateport has mysteriously become active. Negi rushes down, prepared to counter whatever emerges. When the smoke clears, SG-1 emerges.
  • 57. Ferdinand. Ferdinand? Ferdinand! The school is caught in the grip of a meme. Half the school thinks it's lame, the other half are busy spreading it as quickly as possible. This division is mirrored in Negi's class.
  • 58. Sayo realises she's behind on her haunting and needs ghost credits. (Don't ask.) So she pops across the deadplanes (again, don't ask) and talks to Mort for tips, since he's the friendliest ghost she knows.
  • 59. Aliens descend upon Mahora. Aliens rise back up from Mahora and go somewhere else, just to double-check. Aliens come back and have their front neural clusters squrgled by the bizarre things happening in an everyday Mahora classroom. Because you know Negi's class? They're the normal ones.
  • 60. Artifact Abuse: Chisame XP. 'Inspired' by Haruna's example and bored with manipulating search engine results, Chisame decides to stretch the limits of her artifact. Naturally, disaster Hilarity Ensues. (Claimed by Japanese Teeth)
  • 61. Aisaka Sayo is a seemingly normal girl studying at Mahora Academy's 2-A class, but she has a secret she'd prefer to forget; she actually can see and hear ghosts, especially the ghosts of the 30 2-A students who died at a bus trip accident years ago and now roam the classroom. Yes, even including a robot ghost and a vampire ghost. Don't ask.
    When a young teacher named Negi Springfield with supernatural powers of his own shows up, Sayo thinks she may have found someone to share her troubles with. But the ghosts now think they may have found a way to return to life, and for it, they need to enlist both Negi and Sayo's help!
  • 62. The Importance of Being Chamo-kun: He may be overlooked, abused, mistreated and overall deservedly bashed... but it could be worse! Have a look at the auditions for the role of the mascot character for Mahou Sensei Negima! and shudder at the possibilities that could have befallen us if Chamo hadn't been elected for the job! (Link pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5 pt. 6 pt. 7 pt. 8 note )
  • 63. Chiyo-chan transfers into Mahora. Cuteness ensues as Negi finally has a constant friend in his age bracket who isn't magic and/or always trying to fight him.
  • 64. The Adventures of Albireo-kun. Super-cute 4koma about a snarky jerkass who goes "kukuku" at the end of every strip when recipients of his advice come a cropper again.
  • 65. On a Mahora-sponsored field trip to a city in Hyogo Prefecture (read as: a way to meet with members of the Kansai Magic Association without arousing suspicion), Negi is abducted by a mysterious teenage girl, who disappears with him in front of the stunned Ala Alba members. She drags him to a local high school — specifically, to an appropriated Literature Club clubroom — and announces that he's now an honorary member of the SOS-Dan. Link.note 
  • 66. Behoimi transfers to Mahora and joins Takane's Trio and Kafuka, Chiri, and Meru as a magical girl team to fight the Tyrannical Itoshiki Nozomu as the Big Bad, The Teacher Of Despair.
  • 67. Elmer Fudd takes a break from hunting wabbits and puts his Spear and Magic Helmet to use hunting ermines. Unfortunately, this particular ermine has some powerful allies...
  • 68. Kingdom Hearts: only it's Negi, Kotaro, and (whichever student you prefer) in place of Sora, Riku, and Kairi. Although I guess Kotaro fits better as the Sora in this scenario... oh well. The plot will proceed differently this way. Mahora is consumed by the Heartless, and the students of 3-A must each find their own way in the worlds in which they found themselves. Disney Crossovers abound.
  • 69. Erm... the opening of the Mahora/Ostia Gateport fells the World Tree, releasing all its stored-up magic and washing traces of Chao's failed End-the-Masquerade spell across the campus. Bad? Not really... since the destruction of the World Tree means that the magical barriers surrounding the school are down, and the student body is going to have to band together to survive the tidal wave of yokai and other supernatural horrors.
  • 70. Chisame (or your favorite Negipa girl) is struck by a mysterious ailment, unexplainable by normal means, that causes her to black out at night and wake up sore and, occasionally, miles from home. She's at a loss as to what to do until she meets Araragi, Shinobu and Araragi's other haremettes, who have taken over Meme's ghostly-problem-solving business.
  • 71. A slice-of-life covering Anya's adventures as Fate's unwilling maid. Unable to rebel directly, the hotheaded girl has to resort to pulling practical jokes on the Fatettes.
  • 72. All the students in 2-A mysteriously vanish. It is up to the magic teachers to bring Negi out of his self-blaming funk, find out what happened, and bring them back. Optional: it turns out that they were throwing a surprise party for Negi and the teachers were in on it.
  • 73. What Kurt Godel would see in Cosmo Entelecheia. Or what [insert name here] would see in Cosmo Entelecheia.
  • 74. Negi's Sweet Home: Negi is a small red, grey and white-striped magical kitten who lives a happy and carefree life with his mother and siblings. One day when playing outside, he gets lost and can't find back home. Exhausted, the little Negi-kitty gives up and faints in the middle of a park. He is found by two junior highschool students, Asuna and Konoka, and taken to Mahora Academy as a pet for their class. What kind of cute and fluffy adventures will Negi-kitty have at Mahora? Will he ever find his family again?
  • 75. Dismahora: Negi becomes full demon and an angel is sent to assassinate him.
  • 76. Same, but another angel is sent instead.
  • 77. Two other angels are assigned to catch and/or eliminate Fate Averruncus at all costs... it doesn't matter if Ala Alba happens to be in the way! Can Mundus Magicus survive? Will Negi's virginity survive with Panty around? How long before Ala Alba surrenders to Stocking's demands of taking her to Satsuki, their master baker?
  • 78. Harry Potter, with Pactio being a rareish old way of Soulbinding.
  • 79. A brief snippet of another Harem 'What If'. Negi's in his late 20s to early 30s now, but he still has the charm. And considering he's still teaching at an all girls school, his old students... sort of have to keep an eye on the teens. So they take jobs teaching at Mahora as well. From Asuna teaching P.E. to Chisame teaching Computing, from Yue's Literature classes to Ku Fei handling the Martial Arts Club, can poor Negi find a moment of peace to teach without being bothered by his students *or* his colleagues?
  • 80. A Negima fanfic written in the My Immortal style.

    It was... Konokemon!
  • 81. Negi discovers that his affinity for air magic is actually because he's an Airbender. Akira's a Waterbender, by the way, while Chao represents the evil Future Fire Nation.
  • 82. Negi Springfield vs. The World: Negi starts dating Asuna, but soon discovers that in order to do so, he first has to defeat her seven former protectors of Ala Rubra to gain acceptance: Takamichi T. Takahata, Eishun Konoe, Albireo Imma, Gateau Vanderburg('s spirit in a robotic body), Zect Filius, Jack Rakan and finally his own father, Nagi Springfield.
  • 83. Yue's cousins come to visit, bringing their young, green-haired next door neighbor along. Naturally, she gets a hold of some powerful magical itemsnote , and chaos ensues.
  • 84. Kotaro wakes up one morning to discover that his hand has inexplicably turned into Natsumi. Now he must somehow keep Negi from finding out his embarrassing secret.
  • 85. Yue gets visited by one her relatives, Pachouli Knowledge. Crap then comes to Mahora.
  • 86. Mahora Academy of the Dead: The zombie plague that has ravished Japan has made it to Mahora, and worse, the zombies are all highly resistant to magic! How will Class 3-A cope? Guest-starring Frank West!
  • 87. Mahou Sensei Negima Secret Invasion Tie-In: The Secret Invasion has reached the Magic World as the Kingdom of Avalon falls to the Skrull Empire. But Captain Britain and the MI13 are able to call the nearby Kingdom of Ostia for help. However, who can Ala Alba trust?
  • 88. Negima-Marvel Zombies crossover: After the zombiefication of nearly every superhuman, including mages, at Earth, now the Mahora magical community and every student at 3-A (except, quite naturally, Chachamaru and Sayo) have been turned into flesh-eating ghouls. However, pretty soon, they have eaten pretty much everyone in Japan... and the only way they can think of to satisfy themselves is by branching out to Mundus Magicus!
  • 89. Negima-Darkwing Duck crossover. I can't think of a good enough premise right now, but it must happen. And it must have a Negaduck-Tsukuyomi team-up. Yes. It must.
  • 90. Nagi gets drunk and blows up all of the stars. Now Negi must scavenge the earth for the magical energy required to recreate them all.
  • 91. Negi and class 3A's hijinks become so popular they are asked to participate in a special 32-person edition of Big Brother. Who will win? But more importantly, can the house take it?
  • 92. Still wanting to turn Negima into a tv series, Kazumi finally gets fed up of all the Adaptation Decay and decides to take the matter into her own hands. After blackmailing the Konoe family into funding the series (set to broadcast in the Magic World, anyway), she sets out to do the best possible Adaptation Distillation. How does it fare?
  • 93. A rocketship crashlands near Mahora, containing a baby inside. Negi and 3-A adopt the baby, who develops fantastic superhuman powers while growing up. You know how the rest goes.
  • 94. Nagi and Arika have been found, now they start having long talks with all the girls to learn who would be the best possible candidate for their son. Hilarity ensues.
  • 95. Having finally chosen the one girl he wishes to spend the rest of his life with, Negi must face the greatest challenge of his life: meeting her parents. (Claimed by Ack Sed)
    • 95.5 Having finally chosen the girls he wishes to spend the rest of his life with, Negi must face the greatest challenge of his life: explaining the situation to their parents. (Claimed by Ack Sed)
  • 96. Thirty-four strange youngsters have appeared at Mahora waging war against each other. The strangest part of it all, however, is each one of them claims to be the future child of Negi and a different 3-A girl (and, in one case, Anya's. And Takane's and Mei's in the last two cases, much to the latter's horror). Now each one of them wants to make sure THEIR timeline is the one that gets to happen! (Claimed by Shadow Crystal Mage) (Link.)
  • 97. While testing one of Hakase's inventions, Negi and the class are frozen over, only to be revived in the Year 3000. Welcome to the World... of Tomorrow! (Claimed by No Limit)
  • 98. Natsumi's real little brother comes to visit his big sister at Mahora, only to be shocked to find an impostor. Natsumi and the rest of Ala Alba must convince him to play along with the ruse. (Claimed by Japanese Teeth)
  • 99. The Earth learns about mages on Mars so they send a Macross class space ship and a few Gundams for Aggressive Negotiations. Many explosions ensue.
  • 100. Eva muses on her first hundred years of life as a vampire. A powerful tale of historical fiction.
  • 100. (yes, we have two 100s) Katawa Mahou - Negi and company actually got into a slightly more extended fight in the Kyouto (or Hermann) arcs, and wound up destroying large sections of a nearby high school for disabled students. Jerks. To make up for it, Dean Konoemon invites a number of students from Yamaku's 3rd year to study at Mahora Academy instead. Including fanart of Nodoka and Hanako exchanging book recommendations while sitting on beanbag chairs.
  • 101. Crisis Crossover between all the previous fic ideas!

     More Fic Ideas 
  • Take the premise of Neon Genesis Evangelion fic Payback (by Warp Wizard) (NSFW Lemon Fic, BTW.), and use it in a way that fulfills the following conditions (see the numbered list for superscripted notices):
    • Incorporates Negi and his giant, highly convoluted Love Dodecahedron1 as the most significant examples of polyamory, True Companions and Fiction 500, with Ranma and Tenchi (and their respective harems) coming in as strong contenders for the distant second place.
    • Optional inclusion of "haremifiable" casts, such as Bleach, Love Hina, Rosario + Vampire, etc.
    • For the purposes of the thread's unofficial "mission", focus should be on the Negi cast; you have full freedom to write side-stories that tell the other harems' lives, of course.
    • Mandatory epic "spar" between Negi, Kotarou, and Fate on one hand, and Tenchi, Ranma, and Ichigo on the other.

    1. By "Negi's Love Dodecahedron", I mean "every single Negi-shipping that isn't too cracky by our standards" (Yeah, I admit that our standards might be too weird for non-Negima fans). That essentially means...
      • Seminote -mandatory inclusion of all the following:
      • Every single member of Mahora Academy Girls' Middle School Class 2/3-A - and yes, that means Chao too >:-D.
      • Kotarou.
      • Fate.
      • The Fate Girls.
      • Jack Rakan.
      • Tsukuyomi. Bonus points if she's in for both her "sempai" and Negi. Even more bonus points if it involves Konoka somehow being able to 'control' her Depraved Bisexual Combat Sadomasochist Ax Craziness.
      • The Ariadne girls. Bonus points if they're in it for both Yue and Negi.
      • Nagi, Arika and Nekane.
      • Theodora.
      • Seras - she's crushed on Nagi before, and might still be crushing on him to this day. Who's to say she won't fall for his nigh-identical son?
      • Shizuna.
      • Optional inclusion of any other female character that I forgot about.
      • Bonus for all efforts at making Negi's canonical Love Dodecahedron as absurdly complicated as possible.
    2. Lemon and lime sections are, of course, completely optional.

  • My Darling Yankee: a For Want of a Nail fic where Konoka's father was absent for a bit more than just the war; Konoka began to act out in a desperate bid for attention, any attention. As a result, when Setsuna met her again, the sweet oujo-sama she remembers has been replaced by a sarcastic, bitter yankee that terrorises half the class. What will happen to their relationship this time round?
  • Teenage Negi is dating Anya but 3-A keeps interfering at every point and turn.
  • 10 years after Princess Arika saved the world from Nagi Springfield, the Betrayer of Thousands, an uneasy truce exists between the political leadership of the Magical World nations and Cosmo Entelecheia, the shadowy organization that once threatened the world's very existence. They ceased their actions after the Princess set into effect a complex magical ritual that she claims would meet Cosmo Entelecheia's true goals, but are still viewed with suspicion by most mage authorities. The arrangement between them is a grudging compromise forced by the actions of Springfield, a former hero whose name is now considered a curse.
    As a symbol of goodwill, Cosmo Entelecheia sends one of its own as an ambassador to the Old World, to meet with its magical associations and study the society of nonmagical humans. In Japan, the private Mahora Academy receives a new faculty member who looks mighty young to be a teacher: a white-haired boy named Fate Averruncus.
  • Negi & co. get marooned on a deserted island. Narrow the group as much or as little as you wish. They have no equipment beside what little they can scavenge from the wreck of whatever they were using for travel, and have to survive until help comes. If it comes at all. Negi's magic can't be used for communication with the outside world or escape for the simple reason that its range is too small. Robinson Crusoe meets Gilligan's Island meets Negima. Crazy hijinks ensue.
  • Negi botches his use of the Cassiopeia during the Mahora Festival arc and ends up in the past (companions optional). 5 years back to be precise. Suddenly he has a chance to see his father and perhaps get some answers, not to mention use his knowledge of the future in all manner of other ways. What will he do?
  • In what can only be described as the greatest screw up ever, a fanfiction author is pulled into Mahora Academy via a dimensional experiment performed by Chao. Is this author's genera savvy tendencies enough to save him from grey matter meltdown? Based off the classic Self-Insert fic Sleeping with the Girls. First person perspective optional.
  • Beyond innumerable layers of space and time... past the worlds of Nanoha and Ranma and Harry Potter... there is said to be a sprawling world of oceans and pirates and sea monsters, where literally anything can happen. And it is said that this world is a desert devoid of romance, impenetrable to all manners of Ship Tease. A world that the characters of Akamatsu himself could not hope to sway from its chaste ways. But Class 3-A, Haruna in particular, has never been one to turn down a challenge...

  • What if... Haruna and Haruhi had their powers swapped?

  • Haruna and Haruhi from SCM's The Melancholy of Saotome Haruna meet together... and take a liking to each other. What horrors await Chisame, Kyon, and their comrades? (SCM has dibs on this one for obvious reasons, unless he expressly gives his permission for otherwise.)

  • Write one or more Negima characters into one or more of the following series...
    1. Bleach
    2. Naruto
    3. One Piece

  • Write a storynote  that has Nodoka, Hinata, and Shinobu meeting each other. Add as many other characters as you wish, but the story should center on the aforementioned Shrinking Violet trio.

  • Negi and Ranma Saotome meet and discuss/compare/contrast their respective Unwanted Harem predicaments.

  • Negi's first assignment after graduating from Meldiana? Teaching at Fuurinkan as the homeroom/English teacher for Ranma Saotome's class.

  • Ranma Saotome, for whatever reason, leaves Nerima and somehow gets enrolled as a student at Mahora Girls' Academy High School division... in Negi's class (yes, the same 3-A class from the Middle School division that we all know and love). Chaos of both the martial and marital kinds is inevitable. May God help us all.

  • Cross Negima with Armored Troopers J-Phoenix: PF Lips Team in any you deem fit.... except that Kokoro from the latter cannot be substituted for another character, and must be present in a relatively central/major role.

  • Write a story in which Sousuke Aizen is defeated in a "believable" way by a Negima character that is not Jack Rakan, Nagi Springfield, or the Lifemaker.

  • Write a situation in which one or more of the Negima girls finally meet with either or both of Negi's parents (assuming that they have been in fact alive and well all those years, just unable to do much for some very justifiably compelling reason of your choosing) after the entire Mundus Magicus debacle, in a period of "guaranteed peace and tranquility", and ultimately broach the subject of the girl(s)' romantic attachment to their only son. Possible scenarios include (but not restricted too):

    • The girl(s) and Nagi... who has no objections whatsoever to them pursuing his son, as he tell from one look that the couple/harem is an obviously good match "made in heaven". What he is interested in, though, is just how far his son had gone in their relationship - and he inevitably expresses disappointment at his "prudishness".

      • Optional idea: Nagi turns out to be just as "harem-oblivious" as his son; aside from his love for Arika and knowing of Eva's own stalker-ish love of him, he is completely unaware of his vast in-universe fandom's romantic interest in him.

    • The girl(s) having (unnervingly quiet) tea time with Arika, who subtly prods them every few minutes in order to know more about her only son's prospective suitor(s), and "judge their worthiness". (Pfffftttt... as if there's a chance of them being deemed "unworthy". [wink])

  • Assume that Arika has never known about Evangeline's Stalker Crush on her husband, and write a story about the two's first ever meeting post-Mundus Magicus (use the same assumptions about Nagi and Arika's absence as specified above). Having her learn of Evangeline being in love with Nagi, whether before or after the actual "first contact", is up to your discretion.

  • (post-MM): Anything Goes Pervert Fu grandmaster extraordinaire Happousai raids Mahora Girls' Academy's Junior High and High School Divisions. He eventually runs into Class "AA"(1) (AKA "Class Negi", "Class Springfield", "The Class That Shall Not Be Named", "The Class That Shall Not Be Harmed", and "That Bunch Of Girls That You Can Throw Everything Including The Kitchen Sink And It Won't Break Their Goddamned Bonds Of True Companionship, GOD-F***ING-DAMMIT!")... and they are not happy campers. Bonus points if Chamo opposes him for something like "You're breaking the 'honour code' of Gentlemen Perverts around the world!" (Don't ask me how that works; I can imagine Chamo saying something to that effect, though)
    1. "Class AA" stands for "Class Ala Alba", due to the entire Ala Alba club (Well, it is registered as a legitimate school club in Mahora's records) being students of the same class and their home teacher, and the rest of their classmates were in one or the other close associates of one or more of the members; you may have them having been eventually accepted as either full-time or honorary members of the club. This allows for putting the scenario a couple of years after the canon, when they would be in high school; eliminates the issue of having to keep the same letter designation for the sake of recognition; and provides an easy way to refer to the group throughout their school years with the same moniker.
    2. Note that you can of course, at your own discretion, have any of the canonically non-Mahora characters that Ala Alba meets be enrolled in the class for one reason or the other.

  • In one Bleachverse, there was never a "Toushirou Hitsugaya". Instead, there was "Negi Hitsugaya". Write snippets of his life in Rukongai; admittance to the Gotei 13, and his rise to 10th Division Captainship; his relations with the various people in his (after)life (both 'old' and 'new'), especially the female ones; and then the whole "Aizen betrays Soul Society" gig. Does not need to be a full-length story. A one-shot consisting of concise snippets would be sufficient.

  • Takes place post-MM; Negi, reunited with his parents, discovers that one/both of them had made one or more Arranged Marriages for him. The fiancee(s)? Well, that's up to you - any Harem Series (or even normal romantic series) is free game! Oh, and the more ridiculous (within "reason", of course) the pairing, the better!
    • Do try to avoid messing with the established Official Couples or Beta Couples in crossed-over series, though. If you must, a good and canon-preserving reason for the couple breaking would most appreciated.
    • Also, by no means does the ending should be "Negi and his fiancee hook up"; it could very well end with the status quo restored... though most probably not before sufficient Hilarity ensues.

  • Someone insults Negi's (along with a few other Harem Series leads') Chick Magnet credentials in a way that offends most - if not all - of his "haremettes", and prompting them to "persuade" the child mage into competing in the First Inter-Universal Chick Magnet Competition (or whatever you want to name it), featuring contestants from almost every known Unwanted Harem male protagonist. Just what could go wrong?
    • Including Ranma Saotome, Tenchi Masaki and Ataru Moroboshi are quintessentially mandatory, but otherwise you're free to take your pick of any number of "competitors", provided that you always end up with eight of them for the finals.

  • Post-MM arc, Negi discovers an Arranged Marriage between himself and one Vivio Takamachi - and it has his parents' explicit agreement! May God help him when he decides to meet her two mothers.... Better get that nuclear shelter ready.

  • Morrigan Aensland hears of Negi's (and/or one or more [future] member of Ala Alba's) reputation as an extraordinarily skilled and powerful fighter, and decides to visit Mahora to "have some fun". (Taken up by Marq FJA; open for multiple entries)
    1. May or may not be set before/during/after Mundus Magicus arc; it must, however, be set after the Kyoto arc, for obvious reasons.
    2. May or may not involve a free-for-all fight.
    3. May or may not involve Morrigan being interested in "trying out" the child Chick Magent. Hey, she's a succubus! Age makes no difference to her kind. Of course, whether a "purely sexual" being such as a succubus is capable of nonsexual attraction is up to debate.
    4. Must have Morrigan being recently "reunited" with her "sister" Lilith.
    5. Must involve Anything That Moves, tentacle rape, and Sex Is Violence on Morrigan's part. Bonus points for implementing Erotic Dream note , Living Aphrodisiac, Physical God (see her Character Sheet entry for details), Harem Seeker (of sorts; it seems perfectly in-character for her to keep tabs on those she considers as "good playmates"), and Wave Motion Gun (Soul Eraser, anyone?).
    6. May involve Morrigan and Evangeline being past acquiantances of some sort. The former was born in 1678, for the record, and Evangeline may have been born either during or before the Hundred Years' War, as Chachazero uses that as a vague time reference when Evangeline's narrating her backstory.

  • A genie lamp is found by a Negima character (Take your pick). Bonus points if it's the eponymous Genie of Disney's Aladdin note . May God help us all.

  • Preface: We all know how Sturgeon's Law so strongly applies to the Mary Sue character type that it's arguable whether a Mary Sue can even be "done right" at all (hence why its on sturgeonsTropes). And it's also well-known how Mary Sues more often than not end up ruining a fanfic altogether. The question, however, is this: Can a "standard" Mary Sue handle Negima's Trope Overdosed, troperiffic world?

  • Think up possible alternate Pactio pairings for any of the Pactio-holding characters, and write a short one-shot about it. (e.g. Nodoka as Ministra to post-Ariadne Yue)

  • Write a ficlet about any Negima character's Inner Selves and/or Mental World.

  • The Powers That Be have decreed that a Cross-Universal Character Exchange Programme be implemented between Mahou Sensei Negima! and various other anime/manga. Hilarity Ensues, of course.
    • Suggestions for "cross-exchange"note : Sailor Moon, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann.
    • Note: The idea is inspired by the "Sailor Moon Tryouts" chapters of some of FF.Net author Innortal's fics, namely these three.
  • Two years ago a crack commando unit was sent to prison for the crime they didn't commit. These girls promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to Mundus Magicus underground. Still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no-one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire Ala Alba.

  • Random fic idea: The World Domination of Saotome Haruna.

Graduated and out of college (she got a Bachelors in political science that took her seven years because she kept flunking French due to zany misadventures and making manga), Haruna sets out to make good on her lifelong ambition: take over both worlds! As an up and coming world(s) conqueror, she deal with the usual difficulties: Sempai like Doctor Doom and Vandal Savage giving her a hard time, the difficulty of recruiting good henchmen (sorry, henchpersons), the problem of evil lairs (volcano bases and islan lairs are out of her price range, and all the good abandoned factories are taken), start-up capital ("Okay, I build this billion dollar robot in order to steal thousands from banks…"), and being recruited into a heroes rogues gallery ("Look, you're cute, so I can squeeze you into a two-parter, but I can't really say we'll keep you on as a running threat. I mean, you're no Doctor Doom…"). Plus she has to juggle her secret identity as an up and coming manga-ka (Sempai like Akamatsu and Takeuchi giving her a hard time, the difficulty of hiring good inking monkeys, the problem of drawing studios, and being picked up by a good publisher) and her activities as a hero of Ala Alba. But hey, no one said world domination was easy, right?

I've already had visions of Avengers showing upto capture her in her Studio apartment of DOOM (simultaneously her Mangaka studio of DOOM and her World conquest base of DOOM) and before they start fighting, her roommate Nodoka comes in, so Haruna shoves the avengers into the bathroom to hide them. She then gives a long rant about how sponsorship has ruined the heroes and villain industry and how she's decided she's not going to be in their rogues gallery, opting instead to be the arch villain nemesis of Kitsunegirl, a girl who lives in her building, as a way of supporting the small-time heroes and villains industry…

"And if you ever show up here again without a warrant, I'm calling the police. There are LAWS, man!"

Yeah, small business-big business parody.

Side-gag: due to hilarious events, Negi accidentally becomes mistaken as new super heroine Kitsunegirl...

Speaking of which, had a funny thought about Ayaka in this fic idea: she honestly running a clean company, and comes down like a ton of bricks on anything VAGUELY shady, but superheroes all think this is too good to be true and keep suspecting her of shady dealings. Because she's a considerate host, she's added a 'superheroes' entrance to her file room and hired a night librarian to help them find stuff. Naturally, they suspect she's hiding the REAL files somewhere else and go nut's looking for it…

     Characters as a tarot deck. 

  • The Fool: Chamo ('cause he totally is.)
  • The Magician: Yue
  • The High Priestess: Konoka (The Ojou)
  • The Empress: Evangeline
  • The Emperor: Negi
  • The Hierophant: Nodoka, perhaps (due to the association with knowledge)
  • The Lovers: Nagi and Arika
  • The Chariot: Mana (look at the description and tell me she doesn't have almost all those attributes)
  • Justice: Takamichi
  • The Hermit: Chisame
  • Wheel of Fortune: Sakurako (it has to be)
  • Strength: Kaede
  • The Hanged Man: Either Natsumi or Ako (self-esteem issues)
  • Death: Sayo
  • Temperance: Akira
  • The Devil: The Lifemaker, or Haruna, if we're being less serious.
  • The Tower: Dynamis (associated with chaos, crises, etc.)
  • The Star: Takane (naked girl on the card)
  • The Moon: Maybe Kotaro (shadow-based fighting style)
  • The Sun: Makie (eternal optimist)
  • Judgement: Fate (rebirth, attempting to recreate the world)
  • The World: Chao (her involvement in the past, and satisfaction in her actions. Also she can stop time)

     Characters as Cluedo characters. 
  • Evangeline as Miss Scarlet
  • Jack Rakan as Colonel Mustard;
  • Satsuki as Mrs. White;
  • Kurt Godel as Reverend Green;
  • Ayaka as Mrs. Peacock;
  • Hakase as Prof. Plum (a female Prof. Plum);
  • Vandenburg as Dr. Black. You know, cause he's dead.

     The Cast Matched to Their Ideal Cars. 
By cancerlad.
Rakan needs something with a military flair, and BLING. Lots of BLING. Anyone who has ever watched Pimp My Ride knows how much bling can be forced into a hummer... and then survive a REAPER Drone strike. Hummer = car + Rakan Power. (It was suggested he got a gold plated gold H2. Yes, the gold would have gold plating on top of it.)
I was going to go for something like the Noble M15 or the Gumpert Apollo. Maybe a Koenigsegg CCX. Those just didn't seem right. The man needs a supercar. No doubt. Lambo? Can't see him in something mid-engine after some reflection. He is a MAN, that means front engine. And he's British. TVR Tuscan. Hand stitched leather interior = suave. But its been bought out by the Russians. And its a death trap. That leaves us with Ferrari.
He's a smooth gentleman, so that means Aston Martin. He's not James Bond. Only a leading man can be 007, so the DBS is out.
He's trying to be a proper English Gentleman, but he's also a bit of a pimp. This is a conundrum. DBS? Too "man of action" for a 10 year old with a penchant for afternoon tea. That leads us to Bentley. He needs to be able to outrace Takamichi to get to Asuna when she's in trouble. That means sportscar.
She may be a rich girl, but she's as down to earth as it gets for someone voices by Nonaka Ai. She needs something cute. What's cuter (and new) than a Beetle with a flower on the dash? Puppies. You can't drive puppies.
She doesn't have moneys so she needs something used. She's a bit sporty, and a bit... common. VW. Golf.
As a bodyguard she needs something that is both sophisticated, fast, and can blend into traffic. That SCREAMS German. Audi? Too plush. Mercedes? Too much power, not enough handling. BMWs can be driven like a scalpel. Perfect for a winged swords-woman.
She needs a Jag. That's consensus. Something sporty.
Someone mentioned a Tesla. I like the idea, but she needs something with a back seat to take the neighborhood children out for ice-cream, and a big trunk for transporting kittens for when she's volunteering at the local animal shelter. One of those new electric cars? Eh, she might see them as competition... sorry, bad joke. A Prius fits those requirements, and its the poster car for a friend of all living things.
She's cute. She needs a cute car. She's also not shown to be particularly wealthy. She needs a city car, one with a back seat for her raids on the library. But she's stylish in her own way, that means Italian.
It's such a cute little car. Come on. That giant forehead in an Opel Kadett A? She could throw her witches had in the back seat and still have enough room for the textbooks she got at the beginning of the semester and promptly forgot about.
It's the quintessential camper van for the student. She drives it to Comiket, and it has enough room for her products she'll sell. She can sleep in it (it has a bed which comes in handy... later), and a stove. Perfect for three days away from home. Then when she gets her artifact and starts pimping... So she earns enough money for an upgrade. She's filthy rich now. Why not go for a supercar. All supercars are idiotically impractical, but the Zonda is in a league of its own. It is a car for a villain hell bent on world domination, but possessing a sense of style exceeding your average Bond bad-guy. Zonda. Definitely Zonda.
She dual welds pistols, like an old west gunslinger. What's the modern equivalent in America for a gunslinger? Biker. Put her in a leather jacket with those fingerless shooting gloves and ride her into town, and she'll clean up like the Punisher. She's not butch enough for a full on hog, though. Better go with the softail.
Like Ku Fei we need a car that's small and powerful. A rally car. Evo? STI? Those are too common. She needs something a little exotic looking. The clio sport fits the bill, and is MR.
WHAT ARE YOU MISORA? A mage or a student? A hero or a coward? MAKE UP YOUR MIND! We need something as mixed up as she is. Something mischievous. The Carver fits the bill. Are you a Trike or a car? What's the deal CARVER? Plus the way Cocone pulled her head side to side in the OVA reminds me of how the Carver leans into turns.
Pure sportscar for Yuuna ☆ Kid.
She's one of the more normal girls in the class. She needs something normal. And functional for those swim meets. Fiesta it is.
What's more royalty than the Rolls? Buckingham Palace? She's too stylish for anything other than a convertible though. And that brushed steel hood is super sexy. Just like her.
Trendy. You can find them shopping in the trendiest parts of town. Perfect for a small roadster. Japan likes small cars, so lets get a SMART.
The only flying car in the world. Perfect for a time traveller. The Delorian is a crappy car, she has higher standards.
She uses one in the manga.
Needed for transporting food for catering gigs.
The quintessential vehicle for all photo-journalists.
Who is the most stylish villain in comics? Fate. Needs something Italian. Something fast. Something sinister.

     Things They Would Never Say 
  • 1. Nodoka: "Ah, the perfect way to spend a chilly night. A nice, warm book burning..."
    • "You know what's a quality book? Twilight."
    • *puts on comptina daemonia* "Kiss the ring, bitch."
    • "I say we demolish the library and replace it with a statue of me."
  • 2. Haruna: "Have you no morals! Have you no decency!"
    • "Anything for a quiet life."
    • "You can't always get what you want.~"
    • "Manga? Manga is for losers with no lives."
    • "Ewwwwww! Those guys are naked!"
  • 3. Negi: "Anybody know where I can get some porn?"
    • "I would like to seen in a bunny outfit." (Site NSFW but I do like that image.)
    • "Who cares about what happened to my dad?"
    • "Blood for the blood god, skulls for the skull throne!"
    • "Itou Makoto-sama is my idol!"
    • "I'll take a *insert Starbucks drink here*."
    • "Let the fools who oppose me destroyed by the power that I alone possess!"
    • "I never wanted to be a teacher. I wanted to be... A LUMBERJACK!"
  • 4. Sakurako: Dammit, I lost $5,000 in Vegas again!
    • "Karaoke and gambling again!? But I always lose!"
  • 5. Evangeline: "Wow! Edward is so much cooler and sexier than me!"
    • "Onii-chan!"
    • "I never play video games because they are too hard."
    • "Albireo! Get your ass over here! I need my personal wardrobe consultant!"
    • "Waitress, I want another garlic soup. And make it double now!"
    • "If I train you, you might get hurt. A nice person like me wouldn’t want that."
    • "What is a harem?" *throws a glass of wine* "A miserable little pile of frustrated girls. But enough talk. I HAVE YOU!"
  • 6. Chachamaru: "These kitten-fur gloves I made are quite exquisite."
    • "Judgment day is inevitable."
    • "Decepticons! Transform and Rise UP!"
    • "Clearance? I don't need that to use my cat!" *BOOM*
    • "Forget Eva, Negi and cats! From now on, I’m doing what I want!"
    • "Bite my sexy metal ass!"
  • 7. Ako: "You know what my favorite movie ever is? Fight Club."
    • "Ah, rusty blade, you are the only one who understands me..." (slice!)
    • "Boxing is my favorite sport. I just love watching one guy beat another’s face in."
  • 8. Rakan: "NO...ITEMS...EVEEEERR!"
  • 9. Yue: "I've sworn off drinking from juice boxes."
    • "Reading is a waste of time! I have far too much work to do!"
  • 10. Setsuna: "Homosexuality is a sin, ojou-sama. You shouldn't entertain such thoughts."
    • "I'm too sexy for my shirt! Too sexy for my shirt!"
    • "I only want Kono-chan for her body."
  • 11. Makie: "This test was simply too easy. I cannot believe you commoners all flunked it down. I'm ashamed to call you all my classmates. Where could I find a place that fits my intellectual needs? Where, I wonder?"
    • "Ba be bu be, BOINK!"
    • "Gymnastics is stupid. I want to have a more grimdark hobby."
  • 12. Fate: "Ha ha ha ha! C'mon, buddies, let's forget all this Cosmo Enchilada idiocy and just head town for some fun!"
    • "Yes, I'll have a small coffee and Egg McMuffin, thank you."
    • "Well gang, it looks like we have another mystery on our hands!"
    • "Ah, my favorite! Roast orphans with a fava beans and a nice Chianti!"
  • 13. Chamo: "Negi! Have you no shame? You're too young for this Pactio business!"
    • "Damn, but Kotaro-kun has a nice tail... if you get my drift..."
  • 14. Chao: "Wow, I can poke this q-tip clean through."
  • 15. Yotsuba: "I don't feel like cooking today."
    • "Fight to the death and I’ll give the victor a piece of stale bread!"
  • 16. Ayaka: "Wow, Chamo is so sexy..."
    • "Brats like Negi are far too annoying."
  • 21. Ku Fei: "Fight? I might break a nail!"
    • "Negi’s musculature is far too developed for my tastes."
  • 22. Akira: "I wonder how I'd look in woad."
    • "I think that pool's too deep for my liking. I mean, the water reaches up to my knees!"
  • 23. Konoka: "I swear to Amaterasu, I will cut you, bitch!"
    • "Those whom allow themselves to be injured are weak. Leave them behind."
    • "This fan is to be used as a suppository."
  • 24. Kotaro: "Natsumi-neechan, stop stealing everyone's spotlight!"
    • "Team Edward forever!"
  • 25. Natsumi: "Only the center of the stage befits a diva such as me."
    • "You know what my favorite food is? Spring onions."
    • "This slut here's Chizuru. And this bloke here's Kotaro. They are my bitches, and they love it, don't you, bitches? Yeah, you'd better do, and you'd damn better not forget it either. So, what can I do for you, Bro? Came for bitches? I can get you some of the finest at this mudhole. But not these two. They're only mine, and I don't like the fuckin' way you're lookin' at them, Bro..."
    • "Unfortunately, when I’m on stage, you can’t see my cute freckles."
  • 27. Tsukuyomi: "No time to fight, Setsuna-san, I have my therapy session in a few minutes, and I don't want to be late."
  • 29. Arika: "It was all Asuna's fault!"
  • 30. Nagi: "I am the smartest in Ala Rubra! But Rakan is the strongest."
    • "Education is important! A well-rounded and cultured individual is what is needed in today's world!"
  • 32. Chisame: "Hello? Technical support? My cup holder's broken again."
  • 33. Misora: "Stand and fight me, you cowards!"
    • "Pranking is an unforgivable sin."
  • 34. Chizuru: "Come and get a breastful, sonny!"
    • "Why should I care what happens to those children?"
  • 35. Takamichi: "WHY WON'T YOU HAVE ME, ASUNA?"
  • 36. Asuna: "Sorry, you're a bit too old for my taste."
    • "These 'underwear' things are so restrictive..."
    • "I’m giving up my job to have time to volunteer at the daycare. After all, I don’t have to pay back my tuition fees."
  • 37. Kaede: "I really need an orange jumpsuit."
    • "Why would I train when I could be studying?"
  • 38. Sayo: "THRILLER! Thriller of the night!"
  • 39. Satsuki: "Ah, Play-Doh! The height of gastronomical perfection!"
  • 40. Fuuka: "Hate me! Loathe me! Live in an unsightly manner! Only then will you have the power to stop me!"
    • "We’re going to bed early and have low-sugar cereal for breakfast."
  • 41. Fumika: "I WILL KILL YOU! For I am... an AVENGER!"
    • "Look at this! To look different from that stupid sister of mine, I got myself these nifty tattoos! And these piercings! And I dyed my hair black! Cool, huh?"
    • "I can’t go out and play. I have to look after my caterpillars."
  • 42. Emily Sevensheep: "Ah, I've failed! Beatrix, as punishment, tie me to the bed and spank me! Then after that, the oral sex!"
  • 43. Anya: "A flat chest is a status symbol! A rarity!"
    • "Breast Implants, here I come!"
  • 44. Chachazero: "AUTOBOTS! ROLL OUT!"
  • 45. Dynamis: Welcome to Cosmo Enchilada! May I take your order?
  • 46. Chigusa: "And I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids!"
  • 47. Konoemon: "And that is why my head is this shape. Now, let us never speak of it again..."
  • 48. Takane: "I've decided to embrace my destiny. From now on, I shall wear no more clothes. Neither will you, Mei."
  • 49. Godel: "Dear citizens of Ostia, as the first decree of this bright new era in the annals of our glorious country, I have the pleasure to announce you all that... Wearing pants is forbidden now."
  • 50. Nitta: "Let's rock 'n roll all night long, dudes! I feel like I'm 19 again!!"
  • 51. Yuuna: "My dad is an ugly jerk and I’m going to go sulk about it!"
  • 52. Kazumi: "I’m leaving my cameras behind because I don’t want to embarrass anyone."
  • 53. Misa: "It is better to go for older men whom have already established their personality."
  • 54. Madoka: "This makes me look too girly."
  • 55. Mana: "I’m selling my guns and giving the proceeds to charity."
  • 56. Satomi: "Robots are boring."
  • 57. Zazie: *wall of text*

    Class 3-A Rules 
  1. Writing your homework in meat and feeding it to Kotaro so that 'your dog ate it' is not an accepted excuse.
  2. Hakase is not allowed to 'upgrade' the chalk.
  3. You may not sell tickets for the opportunity to 'screw' Chachamaru. That means you Kazumi, Haruna.
    • You too Chao.
  4. The words "YOU TIME TRAVELING BITCH!" may not be used in class.
    • Not even during exercises, Asuna.
  5. No one may tease Natsumi for being a furry. There is no proof of this. What's a furry, anyway?
    • Well, you see...
    • Don't ask, Negi-kun.
  6. Hitting Haruna to stop her talking is not allowed.
    • By order of the dean, it is now ok.
    • So, no detention for Chisame.
  7. You may not try to kill your homeroom teacher, no matter what happened between you and his father.
    • Sucking his blood if he is manipulated into agreeing due to his young age agrees is perfectly fine.
  8. No one may test whether Eva will die if she is killed.
    • The answer is apparently "no".
    • No one may tell Eva where Buffy-san is hiding.
  9. You may not molest Negi Springfield in any way while on campus. That includes groping, frisking, goosing, surprise-kissing, and anything else listed in any edition of Saotome Haruna, Asakura Kazumi and Chao Lingshen's Guide to Alternative Terms for Copping a Feel of Negi Springfield. End of discussion.
  10. "Baseball janken" is forbidden at all times, in all circumstances.
  11. Conducting female-on-female orgies on campus in hopes of getting Negi Springfield to join in is forbidden.
  12. You may not "carry Negi-sensei on your shoulders" as he teaches the class in order to "relieve him from the unnecessary effort of walking around the room".
    • Yes, that means you, Ayaka.
    • Yes, that also applies to everyone else, Makie!
  13. Organizing demonstrations for "increased sexual freedoms on campus" is not allowed.
  14. Anyone found using the campus computers and/or network to write, read, or post lemon fanfics involving Negi Springfield will be punished by four weeks detention, and writing "I will not use the campus computers and/or network to write or read or post any lemon fanfics of Negi Springfield-sensei ever again" 1, 000 times in perfectly legible Old English Text MT font. Failure to perform the latter correctly is punishable by repeating each botched line another 100 times, the new lines subject to the same precision requirement and punishment, ad infinitum.
  15. When you inevitably disobey all the prior rules, which will happen regardless of your current intentions, make sure to do it with style.
  16. Reading the minds of others for own ends is strictly forbidden.
    • Reading the minds of others for others' own ends is also strictly forbidden.
  17. By order of the dean, Rule #15 is overridden by Rule #18 (see blow). Haruna, Dean Konoemon wants a word with you.
  18. Disobeying any of the rules (except for the overridden Rule #15) regarding improper relations and physical contact with Negi Springfield is ultimately punishable by binding the offender, gagging them, and then forcing them to watch a looped video of their classmates enjoying "cuddle time" (off-campus, of course) with Negi Springfield without them, for a minimum of 10 hours.
  19. No editing of The Rules by students without express supervision of a teacher. No, Negi-sensei does not count, girls.
  20. Weapons are prohibited from the classroom. No, I do not want to hear that "it's for protection" nor "it's for business" from either of you, Setsuna and Mana.
  21. Rule 20 will be overruled for cases when students are weapons themselves. However, we do not accept Death Scythes.
  22. By order of the dean, Setsuna Sakurazaki is allowed to keep her nodachi, and only that, in class due to being officially employed by the Konoe family as Konoka's 24/7 bodyguard. She still has to keep it sheathed at all times, however. She must also exercise discretion in its use; drawing it against unwanted admirers of Konoka is not a valid excuse unless they unambiguously threaten her life or that of other students.
  23. In the case that an outside entity/agency is determined by an on-hand faculty member to pose great threat to the residents of Mahora (special priority for the personal safety of Negi Springfield, Konoka Konoe and Asuna Kagurazaka), the students have full authorization to use any means necessary to subdue and "chastise" the offender.
  24. All students are forbidden from purchasing alcohol. Including those who are technically old enough to drink. This means you, Eva.
    • Making alcohol in your closest with a magical still is also forbidden.
  25. Students are prohibited from sending clones of themselves to class in lieu of actually attending themselves.
    • Doubly so if the clones explode when dismissed.
    • Cloning teachers is prohibited until any and all circumstances.
  26. Hacking into and remote controlling robotic dinosaurs is prohibited.
    • Even if Negi asked you to.
  27. Stealing Negi's clothes and replacing them with blouses and skirts is strictly forbidden.
    • You also cannot make him answer to "Nelly".
  28. No one may bring animals to class.
    • That means leave the kittens at home, Chachamaru.
    • That does NOT mean Asuna, Ayaka.
    • Yes, that includes Chamo.
      • THANK YOU!
  29. Addendum to #27: Stealing or tampering with Negi's clothes in any way is prohibited, PERIOD. Offenders will be dealt with as "sexual harassers". If performed by an individual from outside of either Mahora or Ala Alba's various associates, the faculty have full clearance to... set the students loose on the offender. They had it coming, people.
  30. Skipping classes for a length from two weeks to two months, then arguing you were "Doing the Research" is not allowed.
  31. Nepotism is strictly prohibited, no matter if your relative came from another planet one hundred years in the future. Fighting said relative to the death, on the other hand, is advised.
  32. It is allowed to be normal if you're in class 3-A, but those who are must be prepared to be the odd ones out.
    • Normal arguably includes being extremely lucky to the point of winning increasingly ludicrous bets.
  33. This rule and rule #35 are missing and are actually dedicated to enforce the principle expressed in rule #34.
  34. Not allowed to use Flans Exarmatio or any variant thereof in class.
    • Nor is purposefully causing Negi to sneeze
  35. There is no rule 35.
  36. Madoka is no longer allowed to make wishes.
  37. Akemi-san and Chao must not be described as having an unholy union. It's bad manners.
  38. Homura-san is asked to stop stalking Makie while being cryptic. Her brain is overloaded as it is.
  39. Challenging someone with the same name to the death for exclusive name rights is forbidden.
  40. People are asked to stop putting glitter in Eva's soap. She is in danger of going catatonic with loathing.
  41. The class is a place of learning, this means any earth destroying battles shall be held outside the sacred learning hall.
    • No directing physics breaking spells from outside to the classroom, Eva.
  42. There will be no searching for the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything.
    • Nor will anyone be able to Screw Fate. I'm looking at you, Fatettes - and Negi.
  43. Cosmo Entelecheia is not a Holodeck. It is not to be used for recreational purposes.
    • The same goes for Haruna's Artifact. That means you, J-Teeth.
      • And you, Ack Sed.
  44. Kaede is not a sex ninja. Stop teasing her about it.
    • Kaede IS a sex ninja. Stop teasing her about it.
  45. Tatsumiya Mana is forbidden from fulfilling contracts during class hours.
    • You too Kaede, Narutakis.
  46. Orange is not a school color. Take it off Fuuka, Fumika.
  47. There will be no arm-wrestling in class. That means you, Ku Fei.
  48. If there's something strange in your neighborhood, you will not know who to call.
    • Sayo is also not allowed to hang out with Slimer anymore.
  49. Sayo may not be used as an information relay for peeping on Negi while he is naked.
    • So? We don't need gimmicks for that anyway.
  50. Haruna, last warning: stop harping on your feud with GUST!
  51. Negi Springfield is forbidden from quoting the Bro Code, Bro on the Go, The Playbook, or anything else written by Barney Stinson.
    • You too Setsuna.
    • and you Kaede.
  52. Wearing a suit and saying you are "Suited Up" is not an excuse to not wear proper uniform.
    • Even if "Bro" Negi says it's okay! Negi, you should know better.
  53. Negi is the only one allowed to call Setsuna his "Wingwoman".
  54. There will be no time traveling to avoid coming late to class.
    • Running around fast enough to make the Earth spin backwards is also forbidden, Misora.
  55. No experimenting on your fellow students, Satomi.
  56. Using the robotics department's entire budget on a single project is forbidden. Especially if the project is a weapon.
  57. Sakurako is no longer allowed to run the betting pool.
  58. Konoka is not allowed to tell fortunes via Genitomancy. [[footnote:reading genitals to predict the future. Most forecasts are "Good chance for sex with Konoka]]
  59. Zazie, you can't get out of class recitation by pretending to be mute. We KNOW you can talk!
  60. Please cease all jokes about Iincho's 'busts'. She's a good sculptor and deserves our encouragement!
  61. Setsuna, "My mechanical pencil is a cursed Aoyama Artifact" is not an excuse not to answer the exam.
  62. Satomi and Chao are asked to stop saying they're going to develop a gaydar to keep track of classmates.
    • Satomi and Chao are asked to stop using their gaydar to mess with Setsuna.
  63. Ermine are not to be used as dildoes, Zazie.
    • Ermine are not to volunteer to be used as dildoes, Chamo.
  64. If you have been mentioned by name in any of the rules and you get an idea DO NOT ACT ON IT unless supervised by one of the teachers, and no, Master Negi Springfield does not count.
    • If the idea you got has to do with circumventing any of The Rules, you are expressly forbidden to act upon it.
      • And for the record, it was Negi-sensei who adamantly insisted on adding this rule and also requested to delegate determining punishments for breaking the rule to him. He sounded very disappointed.
      • By order of Class Representative Yukihiro Ayaka, all students of Class 3-A must abide by this rule to the letter. (I will not allow for Negi-sensei's disappointment to be blamed on my alleged inability to enforce discipline in class, dammit!)
  65. Negi Springfield isn't allowed to find his father at least until the school year ends.
    • If it seems he found him, it's really someone posing as him.
  66. It is forbidden to listen to professor Nitta's orders.
    • It is however necessary to take subsequent punishment.
  67. It is forbidden to be shown studying anything other than English with professor Negi.
  68. Rule #69 will avoid the obvious sex jokes.
    • That means we'll know if you rewrite it, Haruna.
      • You too, Nodoka.
  69. Writing someone's name along with a possible cause of death in the Diarum Ejus and then showing it to said person is not an officially sanctioned recreational pastime. It is is fact forbidden, starting now.
    • Yes, Chisame, it was your fault. You supplied both the cosplay outfit and the black cover.
    • The same applies to the Philosophastra Illustrans.
      • Yes, Yue, we do know how to spell it. Stop pointing this out.
  70. Hakase, you are not under any circumstances nor for any possible reason to agree to construct a motorcycle for Negi-sensei to ride on while he is in possession of his Pactio cards. It took us quite enough time to convince Yuusei-san to leave the first time around.
  71. There is no unlockable 'Class Ghost ending'. Sayo-san is still missing.
  72. The next person who points out what Negi-sensei's childhood friend's last name sounds like when enunciated will be expelled.
    • No, 'But we learned it in class' is not a valid excuse.
      • ...Negi-sensei, may we have a word with you?
  73. Yes, Tatsumiya-san, you were indeed "Born This Way". Cease and desist with the song-and-dance. You are terrifying the juniors.
  74. The World Tree is not Yggdrasil.
    • Kotaro Inugami is not Fenrir.
      • No, he will not eat Negi-sensei at Ragnarok.
    • Evangeline is not Fenrir. She is a vampire.
      • No, she will not eat Negi-sensei at Ragnarok either, despite her continuing efforts to the contrary.
  75. Pretending not to know the term 'sexual intercourse' in English is not funny.
    • Negi-sensei may not demonstrate said activity to, and I quote, "help us get the gist of it".
      • Demonstratory learning techniques of any matter, in any shape, form or by any possible conceivable definition of the term are hereby banned.
  76. We did not, do not, and will not "drop the banhammer", Chisame-san. It is called "curtailing activities that are harmful to the learning experience".
    • Stop sending us spam mail.
  77. Jack Rakan is not Chuck Norris.
    • Nagi Springfield is not Chuck Norris.
    • Negi Springfield is not Chuck Norris.
      • He is not Batman, either.
  78. Dressing Kotaro Inugami in a skintight catsuit, giving him a sword labelled 'Pantera' and telling him Negi-sensei has legally changed his name to Ichigo Kurosaki is not funny. We have Filler, and we will use it.
    • Fate-san requests that you stop drawing tear lines on his face.
  79. Jack Rakan does not has an eight-tailed octopus-ox ...thing sealed inside of him.
    • Please make him stop rapping.
  80. Aperture Industries is not secretly watching and looking for new blood, Hakase.
    • Whatever you've done with Chachamaru, please undo it.
  81. Replacing "Adeat" in Chachamaru's audio files with "NEEEEW WEEEEAAAPOOOON" is not a 'recipe for hilarity', as Eva claims.
  82. Negi-sensei is not Magical Trevor.
    • His tricks are not ever so clever.
  83. Negi-sensei and Kotaro are not allowed to sing. For ANY reason.

     Fanfic Theories, Fandom Lexicon, And Other Scholarly Works 

Some thoughts on the differences between Negima Magic and Nanoha Magic

While functionally the same, there are great differences in the execution and use of both magics. Nanoha magic uses mathemathical calculations as a basis for it's spells, while Negima magic seems to use present recipes of spells that have universal effect, the only difference being which words/modifiers to use for which element.

Given magic is usally referred to as an art, I'd like to use an extended metaphor for them. Nanoha magic is like music: while artistic, it has an underlying logical numerical theory. stray too much from this theory, and you're basically making noise. Negima magic would be painting: there are some loose rules in place, like color theory, distributions of subjects, etc, but mainly it's all up to the painter.

Both disciplines create beautiful art, but they are art that is not interchangeable. There is no direct translation from musical form to painting form, and vice versa. You can't translate the "1812 Overture" into a painting, and you cant turn the Mona Lisa into a piece of music, because there is no 1-to-1 correlation between the two disciplines. The best you can hope for is for indirect translation: A piece of music that is inspired by a work of art, and a work of art that is inspried by a piece of music. Each, however, interprets the other in it's own way. This means that Negi can be inspried by the Starlight Breaker spell, but he can't use Nanoha's formula for it, because there is no point of correlation. However, he can be inspried create soemthing like it with his own magic.

Regarding the tools of either art, while there may be similirities, they are also not tranferrable. A paintbrush might be used to play drums, but that's not what it was made for, and sloppy besides. likewise, you can't use a violin bow to spread paint.

On the Differences between Belkan Magic and Mid-Childan Magic

While both are music, both are different types of music. One is classical, the other is heavy metal. Both use similar instruments to make similar sounds, but the underlying theory behind them is culturally different. However, they can take elements from each other, and even instruments, because they are both forms of music. That's why Ancient Belkan magic can be both similar and different from modern Magic (Amy wasn't able to understand their barrier spells at first), and yet why they can also have interchangeable gear (the cartridge system, Linker Core spells).

On Magic and Chi

Chi can be regarded as a completely different art altogether. In this metaphor, let's make it dance. Both have a superficial similarity: as dance and painting both start with physical movements, so do magic and ki start with focus and concentration. There, however, the misleading similarity ends. The movements in dance are basic steps to its ultimate form, while the movements in painting are simply a way to begin expressing the real art. This explains why chi and magic are opposites in-series: Dance is an art of a maximum of movement, while painting is an art of a minimum of movement.

Taken in this light, it is now apparent why Kankaho users like Takamichi and Asuna are so rare: they have basically learned to paint and dance at the same time, doing two philosophically and themtaically opposite things simultanesouly. This is the equivalent of rubbing your belly and tapping your head at the same time, but infinitely more complicated, hence why there aren't many of them.

This is not to say that one can't know how to both paint and dance, but they generally won't do it at the same time. For someone not a prodigy like Asuna and Takamichi, it's inefficient and produces infinitely inferior results than if you just used one or the other.

Someone trying to play music while painting would also experience similar difficulties.

On the physical aspects of Ancient Blekan Magic and a possible link to chi

Canonically, A-Belkan magic supplements casting by drawing on physical energy of the body. If this is interpretted as chi, then they have learned to dance and play music at the same time. In the real world, this isn't impossible, but it is also very difficult, if not as difficult as painting and dancing at the same time. Belkans have probably learned to supplement thier music by more energetic, dance-like body movements, while Mid-Childans only use small gestures that bring out the most efficient production of sound.

Theoretically, it means it's proabably easier for a chi-user to learn Belkan-style than Mid-style.

Really scary thought


     Possible Future Children of the Girls as Shown in the Fic, “Descendants of Negi” 

  • 2.1 Sayo Aisaka: Yuuko Aisaka-Springfield. A Halfa generated the old fashioned way after Sayo was invovled in an accident with Hakase's experimental Ghost portal. Has inheritted her father over-thinking worry-wart ways and her mother's clumsiness.
  • 2.2 Yuna Akashi: I really don't see her as being with Negi, but I'll see what I can do...
  • 2.3 Kazumi Asakura: Mikuru Asakura-Springfield. Unfortunately got lost, but was found by a nice girl who is into strange things. Might be a while...
  • 2.4 Yue Ayase: Ariadne Ayase-Springfield. The Second Valkyrie Black. Is burdened by having such a heroic legacy. While an good fighter and mage, has a bit of a complex because people keep telling she's 'not as good as her parents at that age'. Secretly wants to be a writer.
  • 2.5 Ako Izumi: A boy with long hair, more like Negi's if he didn't have it tied. Still bluish in color. A Battle Medic Ninja and Awesomeness by Analysis incarnate.
  • 2.6 Akira Okochi: Still need ideas...
  • 2.7 Misa Kakizaki: Still need ideas...
  • 2.8 Asuna Kagurazaka: Chibi-Asu. I intend to milk all the Sailor Moon parallels for all they're worth.
  • 2.9 Misora Kasuga: Rosette Kasuga-Springfield. Magitech-gun toting nun-mage. Can't drive worth a damn, and can actual crash a shopping cart so hard they catch fire and explode.
  • 2.10 Chachamaru Karakuri: Multi. She's carrying around the soul (in the severed head of) her mother, and is trying to reconnect her to the only thing that can sustain her: her old body.
  • 2.11 Madoka Kugimiya: I see her as a Kotaro girl, mostly. Maybe another Inu 0 Yasha joke character?
  • 2.12 Kū Fei: Still need ideas...
  • 2.13 Konoka Konoe: Might not be appearing in this fic. Tentatively named Himeko. Exactly like her mother. Obfuscating Stupidity to near Chess Master levels.
  • 2.14 Haruna Saotome: Still need ideas, as the expectation regarding Haruna and the Saotome name are always REALLY high...
  • 2.15 Setsuna Sakurazaki: Arika Sakurazaki. Already introduced. She's not a crazy as she seems, and actually DOES love her sister. Being a crazy pervert is the only way she can show it, since for some reason telling your sister you love them and want to spend the rest of your life with them as their wife is actually WORSE, from an emotional standpoint, then trying to fell them up all the time.
  • 2.16 Makie Sasaki: Tentatively 'Kimberly' Springfield. Her parents moved to Angelgrove, California when she was young...
  • 2.17 Sakurako Shiina: Yamato 'Mat' Shiina-Springfield. Has insane luck. A history buff and member of the Naginata club. Has latent magical powers, but ever since an accident with Paru and her book, has ben distateful of magic in general, and thus doesn't want to learn. Expy of Mat Cauthon.
  • 2.18 Mana Tatsumiya: Rally Tatsumiya. Like her mother, especially in her penny-pinching ways. secretly has ninja-training, since Kaede trained her just to piss Mana off.
  • 2.19 Chao Lingshen: None yet, reserved in case I need a Deus Ex Machina.
  • 2.20 Kaede Nagase: Mido Nagase. A sickly girl who is actually a highly successful teen detective, using a variety of forensic shinobi skills and variations of fortune-telling magic. Powerful magically, but lacks the stamina to cast the big spells. Technically Weak But Skilled. Trying to solve the mystery of how all the children not only gained access to time-travel technology, but chose the same point in time to arrive.
  • 2.21 Chizuru Naba: tentatively none. She's one of Kotaro's girls.
  • 2.22 Fuka Narutaki: Nagi Narutaki-Sprinfield. Opposite of his mother. Different timeline from below. Hates his brother/cousin.
  • 2.23 Fumika Narutaki: Nagi Narutaki-Sprinfield. Opposite of his mother. Different timeline from above. Hates his brother/cousin.
  • 2.24 Satomi Hakase: Multi. Assisted in her creation and is by default also her mother, which is sort of incestous when you think about it. Negi's legal wife in Mundus Vetus.
  • 2.25 Chisame Hasegawa: Nanami and Makoto Hasegawa. Both were raised strictly by thier mother to have the sort of life she'd wanted for herself. Nanami is a rabid super-hero otaku, and wants to believe in the existence of wizards, youkai, vampires and time travelers. Makoto is trying to launch himself as a masked vigilante, but his mother keeps cramping his style. Undecided on whether they appear...
  • 2.26 Evangeline A.K. Mc Dowell: Seraphine Ataraxia Vitalia Mc Dowell-Springfield: Her mother was mortally weakened at childbirth, dying when she was ten to give her a significant increase in her vampire powers, so she is now trying to do everything in her power to make sure she ISN'T conceived to save her mother's life. Intend for her and Multi to become partners.
  • 2.27 Nodoka Miyazaki: Ranko. Basically Nodoka crossed with Vincent Valentine. For the Lulz.
  • 2.28 Natsumi Murakami: Kagome Inugami. A magical accidental as she was falling down a well caused her to ended up in this timeline by accident. Her boyfriend from the Feuding States Era is currently on a mission to get her back.
  • 2.29 Ayaka Yukihiro: Arika Yukihiro-Springfield. Her parents were killed when thier home was attacked by an enemy of Negi's who got wise and stalled them with his demon army to hold them in place while he dropped several defunct satellites on their heads. Ayaka survived because she'd been put in a panic room bottle resort that was launched out of the mansion. Raised by her aunts, she grew up vowing justice for her fallen parents, and took up her father's staff as the mysterious masked wizard, Black Alice. She has been sent back in time as part of an elaborate plan to... do something mysterious. Trying to maintain the balance of doing the right thing and doing what she wants. A for the lulz idea I might actually pursue...
  • 2.30 Satsuki Yotsuba: Still need ideas...
  • 2.31 Zazie Rainyday: Still need ideas...
  • Arika: Arika the 2nd. Already showed up, and is half-heartedly trying to instate her timeline because of the machinations of the Big Bad.
  • Takane: Still need ideas...
  • Mei: Still need ideas...
  • Anya: Alex Cocolova-Springfield. Fire-magic user. his mom has made him prefer pettankos, along with other little bits of brain damage. Uses an imperfect, under-development application of in-battle fortune telling to predict and counter opponent's moves. Doesn't really work that well yet...
  • Sextum: Still need ideas...
And as the fic in question MIGHT be a 2814 elseworld...
  • Green Lantern Nanoha: Still need ideas...
  • Sinestro Corp Fate: Still need ideas...
  • Illya, Miyu and Kuro: Already there.
  • Supergirl: Arika In-Ze Springfield. Teenaged last daughter of Krypton, has psychosmatically lost her Kryptonian powers and was reduced to the mind of a child from watching the Joker, Cassandra Cain, kill her parents. Controls the Star Seed of Krypton as Sailor Krypton. Comes to the present under the care of the mysterious Batman, who she calls 'mama'...

    Class of OCs 

  • Hibiki Aya: The card player and gambler. Unlike Sakurako, she depends on actual skill instead of luck to win her bets. Maybe a fan of Yu-Gi-Oh even though she despises overall anime and manga? Openly lesbian, in a stable relationship with another girl. Has her hair done in twin pigtails.

  • Hinomori Misato: The conspiracy nut. She's right in the one shot (at least regarding the existence of Mundus Magicus. I'll let it open to you if it really collapsed or not), but always wrong in her theories in the main project(s). Wrong Genre Savvy. At first she thinks that she’s the heroine (she isn’t) in a more traditional romantic story, not realising that this is a harem comedy and later continually changes her mind about which genre and tropes apply to her life. Naturally, the Genre Shift only confuses her more. She notices some of the odd things about Negi, but until she’s bought into the loop, keeps changing her mind about what he is and none of her guesses are a magic user. Blonde with her hair made up in a bun. Short and active, likes roller skating.

  • Cheryl Dixon: American exchange student. Otaku, speaks choppy Japanese, but naturally aces Negi's English class. Curly short black hair, glasses, overall similar to a pudgier, shorter Haruna. Can't draw, but tries... and tries... and tries... Bubbly and perky. The only knowledge she has of Japanese culture comes from anime, and she is still coming to grips with how Japan actually, uh, works. Lolz if there is a slight language barrier between her and the other students. Speaks mostly in Japanese stock phrases. Has a rivalry with Ryo.

  • Nakahara Minami: Iincho's assistant and henchwoman right hand woman. Really not a bad person at all, but she's the manipulative Iincho's doormat and will do anything she says. Short messy black hair, nervous and submissive. A real ball of neuroses. Bites her fingernails when under pressure or stress. A student with good grades.

  • Barahime Mimi: Boxer, vey tomboyish and crass. Makes Asuna look refinated and elegant by comparison. Grew up without a mother. Hates her cutesy name. Actually gets good grades, makes no big deal of it either way. Short reddish hair. A total slob. She only cleans up after herself at her roommate's insistence and is always scruffy and disorganized.

  • Hanagata Miyuki: Hockey player. Mimi's best friend. Black hair down to her shoulders, glasses, freckles, rather big bust. Normal behavior.

  • Sanzenin Madoka: I wanted to have someone who happens to have the same first name as one of the original cast, because between 61 girls, at least one first name has to repeat itself. Everyone just calls her 'Sanzenin' anyway because no one wants to be her friend. (Partially to mock her superiority complex since 'Sanzenin' can mean 'Emperor'). The Jerkass. Loudmouth, never shuts up, arrogant and loud. No special talents, yet believes herself superior to everyone else. Actually, she comse from a formerly rich family that fell into poverty when her father died (Konoemon is just paying her studies out of pity for her and his friendship to her father). Bad at studies (Neo-Baka Ranger?). Really a Jerkass Woobie.

  • Tatsumiya Midori: Mana's niece and current Tatsumiya shrine maiden. Unlike Mana, she's generous and charitative. However, she's also the Cute Mute, and not in the Zazie way. She just can't talk at all, and has to speak through sign language. She can feel the spirits, but she's unable to see them. Her blood has less of a demon part in it than Mana's, so she's considerably weaker than she was.

  • Kuroneko Azusa: The anti-Sakurako. A girl plagued with extreme bad luck. All bad things happen to her. A Dojikko and often an Ill Girl. Played for Laughs until her Day in the Limelight chapter shows exactly how much she suffers because of her misfortune. Played for sympathy from then on.

  • Juliet D'Aguillon: Haitian voodoo witch wannabe. Highly interested on all things related to occultism. The second largest bust in the class.

  • Kobayashi Aoi: Friend to All Living Things. Claims being able to talk to animals, and they do seem to obey her. In perfect communion with Nature, prefers walking around wearing as little clothing as possible. Refuses to cut her hair down. Does Not Like Shoes. Thinks creepy-crawlies are the cutest things ever. A technophobe. She considers herself Born in the Wrong Century and wishes she lived in “simpler times”. She is very conservative and fangirls over anything old, traditional or no longer in common use such as traditional garb and medieval weapons. (Maybe she will spend some time drooling over Negi’s antique collection). Her favourite and best subject is History, which she reads about in her spare time, IT … not so much.

  • Shirogami Hitomi: Expert fencer. Unlike Setsuna, uses a Western style, and she's also skilled with scrima sticks. Likes to taunt and mock her adversaries during and after battle, but she isn't a vicious person like Tsukuyomi. Looks like she has just stepped out of Revolutionary Girl Utena. Constantly watches her weight to nearly obsessive levels.

  • Ishii Hazuki: The tallest and bustiest student. Amateur wrestler. Healthy, exhuberant, very strong and full of life. Long red hair, slightly tanned skin, well muscled. Amazonian Beauty.

  • The Katsura triplets: One is a trap and all tree look identical, tall, blond and pettanko. Rei is the boy and seemingly the most normal of the three. Plays the violin, acts pretty asexual and uninterested in romance either way. Rie acts as the Cool Big Sis, a bit of a prankster, the most outgoing of the three. She's very good at acting, lying and feigning, so she's the one who usually covers for Rei when there's a situation where he must show more skin than he should be showing. Rio is the insecure one. Terrified of dogs, docile and shy. All three of them need to be good actors. They can still have personality differences as long as they keep the acting ability; in fact the most insecure one, Rio, could be the best actor and actually aim for a theatre career after school. Kinda of a Natsumi-type in that her insecurities disappear when she gets into a role; she'd actually be more confident when posing as her, erm, sisters than while identifiable as herself. As for dramatic tension, it's simple: Rie likes her brother a lot (maybe not that much) so she comes up with the idea of bringing him along for high school. Rei knows his sisters love to play with him and goes along because he doesn't want them to feel sad when they're separated. Rio loves them both but is too shy to voice her true opinion, that she worries Rei is giving up too much for them and deserves the chance to grow into his own, um, man. There, differentiation and conflict, no problem.

  • Makahari Tsubaki: A Wrench Wench, not a genius like Chao or Hakase, but a mere auto and motorcycle aficionado. Maybe the daughter of a renowned racer, and dabbles in go-karts herself. An adrenaline junky. Possibly a member of the library exploration club, but for the gear rather than the books.

  • Iwao Yukino: Aya’s girlfriend. An amateur movie director, always trying to rope the rest of the class into working for her filming horrible B-movies. Her proclivity to dress everyone (even Negi's kids?) in different costumes for her student movies may help to fulfil the fetish appeal quota a Negima spin-off requires. If she ever learns about magic, I can see her trying to film a documentary about it. A girl who enjoys arts and crafts. Makes her own clothes and does activities like pottery. Maybe she gives or sells some of the other girls things that she makes.

  • Kageyama Hikari: the elegant-looking Manipulative Bitch Iincho of the class, she views the class as her 'subjects', but unlike the callous contempt such possessive usually breeds, sees the position as a social contract. Believes it is better to be feared than loved, and encourages the class's negative view of her. She uses her manipulations for the ultimate benefit of the class, however, even her most ardent detractors among her classmates agree she puts the class as a whole the first priority. Has long black hair.

  • Kamiya Kirino: a military otaku, she collects oaths and mottos of military and para-military formations. She is obsessed with expanding her collection, showing it off and making sure it never gets stolen. Maybe she wants it to be in the Guinness Book of Records one day (even if she has a long way to go.) She keeps some of it on display in her room, some of it with her at all times and some of it locked in a safe (there is some rotation, however). Her obsession and paranoia make her easy prank victims. She hates actual violence however, and is more into the mystique and legend of the service than the reality. She also plays War Games and buys replicas of guns. Pretty much a female Kensuke. Falls on her knees worshipping Mana's ghost if they ever meet. The class nurse.

  • Kitsu Megumi: a self-styled yakuza princess. This is actually an exaggeration, since her father merely used to be the head of a now-defunct gang. Still, she plays the role to the hilt.

  • Sasagawa Ayana: Head of The Radio Club. Also an internet reviewer. Gained her online celebrity status by reviewing manga/anime/video games/movies in a Caustic Critic manner. She has the double life that Chisame has, but whether or not she's as secretive about it is up to you guys.

  • Goto Mamiko: Girl with language problems. She's this smart girl who just can't talk with others because she stammers too much, has diction problems, the whole nine yards. That has made her introverted and isolated. Not a situation like Nodoka's, where she's just shy and yet has friends, or Chisame, who's just creeped out by the others' weirdness; she's just almost literally unable to verbally communicate, and it depresses her to no end.

  • Noto Ryo: Fan of American Comics. Has a rivalry with Cheryl.

  • Isabel Santos: Brazilian Capoeira practitioner.

  • Inokuchi Akeno: Perky Goth.

  • Miyano Mami: A really tiny girl who plays the tuba and the piano.

  • Edogawa Chiwa: Teen detective.

  • Hirano Eriko: Idol singer.

  • Yuuki Yuka: Member of a cult that's undecided.

     Negi Springfield's One True Threesomes 
Thirty Onenote  One True Threesomes for Negi Springfield
  1. Negi-Setsuna-Konoka
  2. Negi-Asuna-Setsuna
  3. Negi-Ayaka-Asuna
  4. Negi-Yue-Nodoka
  5. Negi-Yue-Emily
  6. Negi-Nodoka-Anya
  7. Negi-Makie-Ku Fei
  8. Negi-Eva-Chachamaru
  9. Negi-Kotaro-Fate
  10. Negi-Chizuru-Kotaro
  11. “Nagi”-Ako-Misa
  12. Negi-Makie-Yue
  13. Negi-Luna-Fate
  14. Negi-Asuna-Luna
  15. Negi-Nodoka-Craig
  16. Negi-Ku Fei-Kaede
  17. Negi-Fuuka-Fumika
  18. Negi-Kaede-Mana
  19. Negi-Chisame-Chachamaru
  20. Negi-Yuuna-Akashi
  21. Negi-Chisame-Rakan
  22. Negi-Natsumi-Kotaro
  23. Negi-Chao-Hakase
  24. Negi-Ayaka-Emily
  25. Negi-Asuna-Chisame
  26. Negi-Hakase-Chachamaru
  27. Negi-Asuna-Takahata
  28. Negi-Ayaka-Kotaro
  29. Negi-Makie-Chamo
  30. Negi-Eva-Chamo
  31. Negi-Eva-Nagi

     35 Things Mr. Rakan is no longer allowed to do 
  1. Enroll in Mahora Academy.
    • Addendum to #1: That includes enrolling as a student and obtaining a job as a teacher, or any other occupation that involves spending prolonged periods of time within the Mahora Academy premises.
  2. Use Zan Kan Ken  to test the durability of the new metal alloys that the science department is developng for their new battleships.
  3. Nor is he allowed to use Zan Kan Ken  as a surfboard.
  4. Use 'Willpower conquers all' as an excuse for blatantly ignoring the rules of magic.
  5. Share more than two minutes in a room with Chamo.
    • Addendum to #5: Particularly if females or their underwear are within their reach.
  6. Attempt to teach children or adolescents Finishing Moves.
    • Addendum to #6: Especially if he created or named them himself.
  7. Compare anyone's power to an amount of cats.
  8. Learn the rules of physics, thermodynamics or any other -ics just so he can break them and make scientists everywhere cry.
  9. Create movies with a budget larger than the U.S.'s national debt and charge the U.S.'s Military budget to see them.
  10. Loan his "memory-to-film-reel" transfer machine to Haruna. Or Asakura. Or Nodoka. Or anybody.
  11. Claim he is Spartacus.
  12. Share more than one minute - that's exactly 60 seconds - in a room with Haruna.
    • Addendum to #12: If circumstances force them to remain in the room together for longer, then they should act like the other does not exist.
  13. Show off those bizarre growths on his chest. Mahora welcomes people of all races, species, model numbers, genders, and creeds, but some abnormalities should be kept hidden.
  14. Charge ludicrous prices to people asking what time it is.
  15. Give Ayaka "The Talk". Yes, we know that whatever "Talk" her parents gave her has to have been horribly prudish and/or skewed from the reality of what sexual relations and romance are all about, but appointing Rakan to remedy that would be a Bad Idea. She'll either be traumatized for life, or worse, it will work too well.
    • Addendum to #15: Give "The Talk" to Negi or Anya. We have Chisame and Nekane for that, people.
  16. Perform demonstrations of his method for breaking out of a Phantom Zone. Calling it a 'reenactment' does not get him off the hook.
  17. You know what? Giving "the talk" to anyone. In fact, talking about sexual subjects in general.
    • Addendum to #17: Particularly if he decides to 'reenact'.
  18. Be let near any weapons, girls, or power tools when under the influence.
    • Addendum to #18: Be under the influence of mind-altering drugs. This includes painkillers. Maybe that will make you think about your actions for once.
      • Addendum to the Addendum to #18: Actually, being under any kind of influence, period.
  19. Showering in public.
  20. Swim in the Panama Canal. Actually, any swimming at all on Mundus Vetus. Actually, any kind of physical activity on Mundus Vetus.
  21. Yelling out 'SURPRISE BUTT SECKS!' for ANY reason.
    • Addendum to #21: Especially if he follows through with it.
  22. Discredit religions by showing how anything their god can do, he can do better.
  23. Stealing panties from young girls for tracking purposes.
    • Addendum to 23: Stealing panties from anyone for tracking purposes.
      • Addendum to the Addendum to 23: Stealing panties from anyone for any purpose.
  24. Becoming a live-fire test subject for the United States Armed Forces. This includes both small arms fire and guided cruise missiles.
    • Addendum to 24: And Weapons Of Mass Destruction, for that matter.
  25. Read any books involving Harry Dresden. Lets not give him any NEW ideas.
  26. Volunteer to be a live model for one of Haruna's Doujinshi.
    • Addendum to 26: Volunteer to be a model for anyone's Doujinshi.
  27. Test his experimental Zan Tairiku Ken  on Antartica.
    • Addendum to 27: He is not allowed to test it on any Continent.
  28. Lick, sniff or otherwise interact with a female's underwear.
    • Addendum to 28: Especially if that female is wearing said underwear.
  29. Consume or inject himself with any sort of performance enhancing drugs, especially Ako's Artifact.
  30. Refer to Evangeline as "Loli-grandma." The risk of collateral damage is too great.
    • Addendum to #30: This only applies if Evangeline is within position to take violent reprisals. If she's powerless, she's free game.
  31. Ride Vrkso Nagasya. He is an ancient divine protector beast, not an epic mount!
  32. Watch Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann or Megas XLR.
    • Addendum to #32: Watch any show with large robots fighting each other. Even if the pilots are blatantly gay. Especially if the pilots are blatantly gay. Remember what we said about getting ideas.
    • Amendment to #32: Not so much watching them, but rather attempting to upstage them, is the problem. So he is allowed to watch them under a promise enforced by an Ennomos Aetosphragis  not to attempt to upstage them.
  33. Clone himself or donate his DNA for the Science Department's 'Cell' project.
    • Addendum to 33: It is priority level One-Alpha-Omega-Prime-Ultima-Terminus-Extremus imperative that Rakan not be cloned, violation of which is punishable by giving away the offender to Rakan and his clones/copies after they have been persuaded that you are in dire need of intensive training. (Read: you'll be their punching bag for a week. Safeguards will be provided.)
  34. Cross over to other universes and solve their problems just so he can charge them.
    • Addendum to #34: No going to the Soul Society just to break out of Aizen's Shikai and make him cry.
      • Amendment to the Addendum to #34: On second though, go ahead, he pisses off too many people. The catharsis factor would surely result in skyrocketing opportunities for massive profit.
  35. Force Edward Cullen into Evangeline's apprenticeship.

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