Die Fremde (When We Leave) is a 2010 drama film directed by Feo Aladag. It is a German and Turkish production.
Umay (Sibel Kekilli) leaves her home Istambul with her son Cem in order to escape her violent husband, and returns to her family in Berlin, Germany. She is hoping for their support, but her father orders her to return to her husband. She refuses. Her siblings are forced to endure their community's rejection.
Their friends shun them and her younger sister's fiancé nearly ends their relationship until the father offers the other family a large sum of money.
When the young woman flees the family apartment after realizing that they are planning to kidnap her son and send him back to his father, they shun her outright and her brother begins stalking and harassing her, culminating in him trying to stab her (after her younger brother can't bring himself to shoot her).
Tropes present in this work
- Armor-Piercing Question:
- Umay tells her mother about her plans to find work and go to school. Her mother tells her daughter that as a 25-year-old mother, Umay's too old, and brings up that she gave up everything for her own children.
Umay: Do you want me to end up like you?- When Umay tells her father about her plans, he tells her she is not alone (as in, her actions affect the family's reputation): "Did we raise you to bring shame upon us?"
- "Do you see what you have done for us? How can we look at people in the eye?"
- Burn Baby Burn: Umay burns her passport after her father orders her to return to her abusive husband.
- Death of a Child: Cem is killed when his uncle tries to shoot his mother, who was carrying the boy in her arms.
- Downer Ending: Umay's older brother tries to stab her but ends up accidentally killing her son, whom she was holding in her arms at the time. Ironically, despite having no remorse about trying to kill his own sister, he is horrified at having killed his nephew.
- Family Honor: After Umay leaves her abusive husband and refuses to return or to send back her son to live with his father, the community turns its back on her family. Umay is told explicitly that if her family has to choose between her and the community, they will not choose her.
- Get a Hold of Yourself: Kader's words to Umay after she insists her son Cem's place is with her instead of his abusive father in Turkey.
- Honor-Related Abuse: Umay's family make plans to abduct her son and take him back to his father in Turkey. She escapes and moves to a women's shelter. They eventually decide that her youngest brother must kill her to restore the family's honor
- Shower Scene: Soon after arriving at her family's home, Umay takes a shower. Her mother tells her that she cannot separate a son from his father, despite seeing the bruises on Umay's back.
- Slut-Shaming: Kader slaps Umay and calls her a whore. He tells her that Kemal called her a "German whore" and does not want her back.
- Would Hit a Girl: Umay's older brother knocks her to the ground when he tries to abduct Cem.
