Earth is... perfectly safe.
Du-ug: Have you any more Smirnoff Ice?
Kenny: Yeah, there's half of one in the fridge.
Du-ug: You will die painlessly!
Kenny: Yeah, there's half of one in the fridge.
Du-ug: You will die painlessly!
My-ik (Diedrich Bader) and Du-ug (Chris Parnell) have come from the planet Kabijj, with simple orders:
1. Conquer Earth.
2. Annihilate all human life.
Their orders are not so much:
3. Develop drinking problem.
4. Fall in love with divorced hussy.
Their plans are complicated by a transmat malfunction, turning their mighty swords into tooth-picks. Nevertheless, they have 24 hours to decapitate every human being on Earth before the overlords send the head-eating giant CROKER!!! (Tyler Labine) to, uh, eat their heads.
This movie contains examples of:
- Alien Arts Are Appreciated: My-Ik and Du-Ug fall deeply in love with Smirnoff Ice vodka coolers. They also consider Kenny and Ron's digs to be "An abomination!" which is great praise on Kabijj.
- Kabijjians also seem to like fast food pretty well, since there's a huge lineup of them in the epilogue when the EAC's open a burger shack.
- Aliens Are Bastards: Their superiors want them to wipe out humanity and conquer Earth.
- Aliens Speaking English: the only word not in English is "Endus," which is used similarly to "Glory" or "Honour" (ex, "Endus for Revere").
- Bizarre Alien Biology: Kabijjians can reattatch severed limbs in an instant, and have no blood. Also, their males become pregnant.
- Bizarre Sexual Dimorphism: In Kabijj the men look like human males, but the women look...just plain weird.
- Call a Smeerp a "Rabbit": "Cats" are apparently a sort of edible plant on Kabijj."Cat's bark? My appetite stirs..."
- Chewing the Scenery: "IT WOULD TAKE A THOUSAND OF YOUR TINY MEALS TO SLAKE MY GIGANTIC APPETITE!!!"
- Cross Cultural Kerfuffle: Kabijjians consider dire insults to be worshipful praise.
- Incoming Ham: CROKER!!! stomps into a restaurant, and screams at the diners.
- Incredible Shrinking Man: CROKER!!! is about 50 feet tall, until the same transmat malfunction that shrunk our heroes' swords shrinks him down to about 6 feet. He doesn't seem to notice, though.
- Large Ham: All the aliens are this, but especially CROKER!!!
- Law of Alien Names: Averted, the aliens are named My-Ik, Du-Ug, Pe-Ny, and Ja-An. The only two strange names are Revere (which may be a title, as he's the alien King) and Croker (which isn't too far off from Kroeger).
- Make Me Wanna Shout: My-Ik and Du-Ug screech "EEEEEEEEE" at people when they're sufficiently upset.
- No Indoor Voice: Two guesses.
- Running Gag:
- The Transmat operator being knocked unconsious, which Revere finds hilarious.
- Ron warning people "Don't to touch my sun chips and crystal geysers."
- Teleporter Accident: A plot-point is that the interstellar teleporter is very finicky. It actually hadn't destroyed the first wave of invaders ( who really just went into hiding), so they fixed it. They actually broke it. Now it randomly shrinks items (and people) sent through it, making My-Ik and Du-Ug's BFS's into cocktail skewers and their makeup kits into compacts. It also turns Kroker the Giant into a normal-sized man.
- Teleporters and Transporters: Kabijjians use a helmet-mounted teleport gun to invade other worlds.
- Trademark Favorite Food: Smirnoff Ice for the invaders, and Ron warns everyone not to touch his Sun Chips and Crystal Geyser bottled water.
- Toilet Humor: the Ceremonial Dunk.
- You Kill It, You Bought It: Kenny accidentally kills Revere and becomes the new King of Kabijj.
