William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet rewritten as a comedy, the first in a series of retooled Shakespeare plays by Shrikecatcher.
Can be read here
Tropes
- Bus Crash: Lady Montague."Alas, my liege," Montague wept. "My wife is dead tonight."
- Captain Ersatz: No, Mercutio isn't dressed as Donald Duck for the costume party, what are you talking about?"Who are you supposed to be?" [the security guard] asked Mercutio. "Donald Duck?""Of course not, good fellow," Mercutio laughed. "I don't want to be sued.""Walt is inside, he'll be the judge of that." He opened the front door for Mercutio, and through it we all saw the partygoers going at it at the party.
- Feathered Fiend: A gull flies through the roof and attempts a Groin Attack on a post-coital Romeo because he doesn't like birds.
- Foreshadowing: Lampshaded, of course.Now That's What I Call Foreshadowing! Featuring music by Eiffel 65, BBMak, and Macy Gray! Wait, what do you mean it's not 2000 anymore?
- Footnote Fever: Act III, Scene iii: Look, a footnote! And Act IV, Scene iv:Really, you can go up to your friends right now and call them all "whoresons," and no harm will be done. *
- Grammar Nazi: Invoked.By the way, grammar Nazis, there's a double negative mocking you ruthlessly at the beginning of this paragraph.
- Have a Gay Old Time: The use of the word "ho" is exploited for all its worth.
- Hope Spot: While Romeo is visiting her tomb, Juliet sneezes every so often, indicating life, but of course he doesn't notice.
- The Immodest Orgasm: While Juliet is getting it on with Romeo upstairs, Capulet, his wife and Paris think that's the sound of her weeping over Tybalt's death.
- Precision F-Strike: Lampshaded; we're only allowed two f-bombs in this story. We get three. The FCC isn't too happy about that.
- Pretentious Pronunciation: The costume party is referred to as a par-tay.We were par-taying at the par-tay, almost to the point of adding a second hyphen, when we bumped into a drunk Master Capulet.
- Shout-Out: Many, starting with the Tagline:
- Sophisticated as Hell: Dialogue alternates between the original Shakespearean and more modern conversation.
- Silly Reason for War: Late in the story, it is revealed that in this version, the families are at war because for generations, the children have sold kittens (Capulets) or puppies (Montagues) on opposite sides of the street, which sometimes doesn't end well.
- Special Effect Failure: In-universe, when the tomb explodes in the last act, the resulting mushroom cloud is only medium-sized because the budget is running low.
