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Fanfic / Discord's New Business

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Discord's opened a new shop. He did it legally. This will end well, I'm sure...

Discord's New Business is a My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic fanfiction by Jonathan "KnightMysterio" Spires (yes, he of Waking Nightmares fame) set somewhere after season 6.

As the title indicates, Discord puts in place a business. A legal one.

Which business? Why, turning ponies into other species for 24 hours! And because he's feeling nice, he gave a free transformation to Twilight and all her friends.

Each chapter is focused on one character, his/her transformation for the day, and what happens to him/her.


And you decide who gets transformed into what!

Can be read here.

This fanfic provides examples of:

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     In general 
  • Audience Participation: As said above, the readers decide who gets transformed into what. More precisely, each chapter ends on revealing who will be the focus of the next chapter. From its publication, the readers have one week to vote for what transformation they want to see.
    • Some chapters let you choose both the transformation and the character, or the transformation instead of the characters.
  • The Mind Is a Plaything of the Body: Some transformations provoke the trope. See Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Starlight Glimmer and Rarity's chapters for more details.
  • Ship Tease: Plenty in the story.
    • In "Customer 1: Fluttershy - Draconequus", when Discord sees Fluttershy's draconequus form, he starts chirping like a bird, puffs out his chest (which gains a large tuft), and creates a bunch of flowers, lollipops, and ice cream cones that start singing around him. Fluttershy immediately recognizes it as a mating display.
    • In "Customer 2: Applejack - Minotaur", after Applejack's impromptu wrestling match against Iron Will, Iron Will asks Applejack out on a date, which Applejack actually gives consideration.
    • In "Customer 3: Spike - Unicorn", near the end of the chapter, Rarity reveals that she likes the idea of being with Spike.
    • In "Customer 5: Starlight Glimmer - Changeling Royalty (Chrysalis-type)", Starlight, as a Changeling Queen, takes Sunburst to be the king of her new hive. He manages to talk her down, and the end of the chapter shows Starlight is now pregnant.
    • In "Customer 7: Rainbow Dash - Griffon", it's revealed that Gilda and Greta have feelings for each other. Also, Gabby apparently catches the eye of a hawk-like male Griffon.
  • Voluntary Shapeshifting: The theme of the fic. Discord, for a fee, transforms his customer into what they want for 24 hours (or more).
    • The possible transformations are: Earth pony, pegasus, unicorn, alicorn, zebra, donkey, griffon, minotaur, old-type changeling (Pre-season 6), new-type changeling (Post-season 6), changeling royalty (Chrysalis and Thorax types), dragon, and draconequus. Special requests are possible.
      • Alicorn, changeling royalty, dragon, and draconequus are more expensive than the others, and require signing a "If I do bullshit during my transformation, it's my fault and not Discord's" form.
    • Later on, Diamond Dog, Genderswap, hippogriff, catfolk, tatzlpony, age manipulation and (for the reader's vote) transformation error are added to the list.
    • Some other forms are seen through other customers, like human.

     Prologue: Opening day 
  • OOC Is Serious Business: The fact that Discord has a permit for his business is what worries Twilight the most.
    Twilight: A permit. As in he's doing this completely legally. As in he somehow managed the patience to actually sit through doing all the necessary paperwork.
  • Reality Ensues: Fluttershy gets to find out how it's like to be a tree. It's not as great as she thought...

     Customer 1: Fluttershy - Draconequus 

     Customer 2: Applejack - Minotaur 
  • Ship Tease: Between Applejack and Iron Will.
  • What the Hell, Hero?: A light version. Rainbow Dash and the Apple family aren't happy at all to see Applejack be a Workaholic.
    Rainbow Dash: AJ... I am disappoint...
  • Workaholic: Applejack uses her freebie and her day off to do more work.
  • Wrestler in All of Us: Applejack gets herself in a wrestling match against Iron Will.

     Customer 3: Spike - Unicorn 
  • Cassandra Truth: Twilight, Discord and Pinkie Pie all tell Spike that his Shapeshifting Seducer plan is a bad idea. He doesn't listen. Rarity figures out who he is almost immediately.
  • Secretly Wealthy: Pinkie Pie has invested her money well, that's why she can afford to throw welcome parties for free. It's also hinted it's not meant to be a secret, she just doesn't think it's important.
  • Shapeshifting Seducer: A rated-G version. Spike chooses to take on a unicorn form for one week (he pays the additional days) to try and flirt with Rarity.

     Customer 4: Pinkie Pie - Alicorn 

     Customer 5: Starlight Glimmer - Changeling Royalty (Chrysalis-type) 
  • Berserk Button: Starlight ends up pushing Discord's by taking on Fluttershy's form.
  • The Mind Is a Plaything of the Body: Starlight craves love as a changeling and instinctively slips into the form Discord would love most of all. She later does the same thing with Twilight, initially impersonating Shining Armour, before regaining control. Then she sees Sunburst and completely gives in to her queen instincts.
  • Relationship Upgrade: Starlight and Sunburst.
  • Wham Line:
    Starlight Glimmer: So, I think I'm pregnant.

     Customer 6: Rarity - Diamond Dog 
  • Affectionate Nickname: Lyra calls Discord Dissy as she thanks him for turning her human. Discord decides he likes it.
  • Big Friendly Dog: Rarity starts acting this way as a Diamond Dog.
  • Bizarre Alien Biology: Apparently, the gestation period for Changelings takes about a year. However, since Starlight is giving birth to hybrids, it might be different.
  • Didn't See That Coming: Both In-Universe and Out-of-Universe.
    Discord: ...Congratulations. You're now one of the only beings in the history of EVER who've caught me off-guard.
  • Humans Through Alien Eyes: Mild case but the chapter opens with Discord explaining the concept of clothes to Lyra when he turns her (per request) into a human.

     Second visit: Rarity - Dragon 
  • Beat the Curse Out of Him: How Ember brings Rarity back to her senses after she succumbs to Greedgrowth Insanity.
  • Karma Houdini: Lampshaded by Rarity herself. Nopony's mad at her for kidnapping them, since they all got something beneficial out of it, including business opportunities and a chance to relax in a natural hot spring.
  • One-Winged Angel: Both Rarity and Ember. Rarity grows to a large size because of Greedgrowth Insanity. Ember is temporarily aged up into an adult dragon to fight her.
  • Really Gets Around: Not technically, but... Rarity kidnaps people she finds physically attractive. We have: Spike, Big Macintosh, Applejack, Fancy Pants, Blueblood, Zecora, Trixie, Filthy Rich, Bulk Biceps, and a changeling.
  • Whole Plot Reference: This chapter is more or less "Secret of my Excess, the Remake", but with Spike and Rarity's roles reversed.

     Customer 7: Rainbow Dash - Griffon 
  • Fantastic Slur: "Magpie".
  • "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Gilda delivers a brutal one on the other griffons on how they let their selfishness and greed destroy their nation.
  • Slapstick Knows No Gender: Rarity, after deciding she's had enough of Discord's sense of humour, decides to leave.
    Rarity: I suppose I walked right into that one. (Rarity turns to leave and collides with a signpost Discord placed right behind her.)
    Discord: No, you walked right into THAT one!

     Customer 8: Princess Luna - Zebra 
  • Adaptational Villainy: Remember Jet Set and Upper Crust, the two jerks from Sweet and Elite? Here, they're revealed to be fanatical racists who, with the help of corrupt guards, beat up non-ponies and brainwash them into never coming back to Canterlot, all in the name of keeping the city "pure". They already had 18 victims, and Luna would have been the 19th...
  • Big Sister Instinct: When Celestia discovers that Luna was attacked while she was disguised, she goes beyond mad.
  • Darker and Edgier: Not that Darker and Edgier, but the chapter is much more serious than the previous ones.
  • Fantastic Racism: During her exploration of Canterlot, Zebra Luna is turned away and treated like crap by a pair of high-end businesses... And is then beaten up by corrupt guards in the service of the pony Ku Klux Klan, as had 18 non-ponies before her. To say the least, Princess Celestia does not take the revelation lightly.
  • Genre Blind: The two racist monsters take sadistic pleasure in gloating to their victims before brainwashing them. Luna takes an equal pleasure into lampshading their stupidity before getting away from them.
  • Mugging the Monster: Everyone who messed with Zebra!Luna.
  • Oh, Crap!: Jet Set, Upper Crust and the corrupt guards when they learn the Zebra they attacked is Luna, and everyone when Celestia gets angry.
  • Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: You. Hurt. My. Sister.
  • Seeking Sanctuary: Canterlot's nobles have the right to extend the protection of sanctuary to anyone they want, and only the Princesses can break it. Fancy Pants invokes his right to protect Zebra Luna.

     Customer 9: Fancy Pants and Fleur Dis Lee - Genderswap 
  • Easy Sex Change: Discord makes Fancy sneeze his mustache off, which is the trigger for her turning female. He then puts the mustache on Fleur, which turns her male.
  • Gender Bender: What Fancy Pants and Fleur Dis Lee decide to have their transformation be. Fancy takes the name Fancy Dress afterward, while Fleur doesn't change his name upon becoming male.
  • Men Are Strong, Women Are Pretty: Fleur tries to invoke this as a joke, lifting up Big Mac's cart. He can't do it, and is immediately shown up by a little filly.
  • Affably Evil, Even Evil Has Standards, Chaotic Is Not Evil, and arguably Blue-and-Orange Morality: We get an insight into Discord's character when we see his anger at Jet Set and Upper Crust.
    Discord: And even then, when I do it, it's FUNNY! Harmless little pranks! General annoyance! Just BEATING someone for being different... No class, no class at all. It's RUDE.
    Fleur: The priorities of a chaotic being...

     Customer 10: Trixie Lulamoon - Alicorn 

     Customer 11: Princess Celestia - Seapony/Siren 
  • Heel–Face Turn: The Dazzlings, at various degrees. Sonata completed hers, Aria's in the middle of it, and Adagio still hasn't begun.
  • Shout-Out: To The Infinite Loops. Queen Novo in this storyline subscribes to the idea of 'seapony diplomacy.' Her method of dealing with pirates who kidnapped her involves dropping a tsunami on them.
  • There Is No Kill Like Overkill: Queen Novo loves this trope.
    Sonata: Novo and the concept of overkill have had a long, lasting love affair.

     Customer 12: Sunset Shimmer - Transformation Error 
  • Cuteness Proximity: Human!Fluttershy thinks Sunset Shimmer as a unicorn is the cutest thing ever, immediately wanting to give her mane brushes and tummy rubs.
  • Shout-Out: During Pony/Draconequus!Fluttershy's attempts at transforming Sunset (which don't work like she expected), one of the transformations is into Twilight. Spike's amused response: "Oh no, it's Lavender Alicorn Syndrome!"

     Customer 13: The Cutie Mark Crusaders - Age Manipulation 
  • Adult Fear: Rarity, Applejack and RD are scared of what could happen to the girls. And they're right.
    • Barely a few minutes after the CMC reach Manehattan, they're targeted by a rapist. Luckily, Discord is here to Mind Rape him.
    • When they go at a bar, a creep tries to pull a Date Rape on Scootaloo. This time, Applebloom's wariness and the bouncer's quick thinking foil the plot.
  • Didn't Think This Through: The Crusaders realize quickly that their plan to spend the day in Manehattan as adults has some holes in it.
  • Kids Shouldn't Watch Horror Films: The CMC became adults mainly because they wanted to watch a play that's an Expy of Marbel Hornets. After watching the play, they're scared out of their minds.
  • Nightmare Fetishist: Of all the beings who saw Granite Wasps, Discord was the only one who wasn't scared by it. If anything, he absolutely ADORED it.
  • Nightmare Fuel: In-Universe. The Crusaders go to see the adults-only play Granite Wasps and are left traumatized by it.
  • OOC Is Serious Business: Honestly, the fact that Maud Pie got traumatized by Granite Wasps should have been a red flag, girls...
Rainbow Dash: It was so weird, seeing her actually emote.


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