A bizarre mixture — a My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic fanfic featuring two different narratives, "Pink Personal Hell", an Odd Couple story where Pinkie Pie appears to be temporarily living with a human while getting on his nerves, and "Altering Fate", a Slice of Life story where a blue unicorn named Nickel Steel is being sent to Ponyville to live and his attempts to fit in. At first, it seems almost like the two have nothing to do with each other apart from the presence of ponies but it eventually blends in, explaining just what a "Pink Personal Hell" has in common with ones' fate being altered.
So it's like Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World... only with the Unicorns being MLP unicorns. May be read here
or here.
Originally written for entertainment with his friends, it gained a prequel in the form of The Altered Fate of Draco Scales, detailing on the story of one character.
Tropes:
- Accentuate the Negative: The mirror acts a little like this — always showing the moments where Dominic was alone.
- Brick Joke: In one scene, a Prank Bit that bounces away whenever she tries to catch it temporarily distracts Pinkie Pie. Then at the end of the scene, it bounces into the magic shop... followed by Pinkie Pie herself.
- Butt-Monkey: Dominic. Potentially this couldn't be the case. (See Unreliable Narrator)
- The Cat Came Back: Dominic tries to shake off Gummy only Gummy keeps holding on no matter what he does.
- Character Development: The "Altering Fate" narrative shows Nickel Steel being somewhat shy, but he opens up to the rest of Ponyville. Revealed to be Dominic from "Pink Personal Hell", who was pretty much a complete doormat.
- Comically Missing the Point: Dominic is told that he broke a Pinkie Promise - and tries to justify it by saying that Pinkie Pie doesn't have pinkies.
- Extreme Doormat: Dominic shows traces of this =- it's implied in the past he had been like this (hiding from everyone else rather than being shoved away) and never does anything about Pinkie Pie (literally!) walking all over him except protest. Nickel Steel is a little like that as well. He gets better.
- Foreshadowing: Several things seem to be playing towards the twist. Among them:
- Nickel Steel playing with the sign. Foreshadowing Dominic playing with the mirror later on.
- Pinkie Pie seems to know Nickel Steel in Altering Fate…and she’s making a new friend in Pink Personal Hell. Gee, I wonder who that can be...
- Food Porn: Dominic describes Pinkie Pie's delicacies as "softcore food porn".
- Hidden Depths: Full Beats is actually highly competent with music.
- Hikikomori: Dominic is only shown leaving his house to go to school apart from the one occasion where he is apprehensive about Following Pinkie Pie to Equestria. Nickel Steel begins as this, flat out being afraid to leave his bedroom unless accompanied by somepony else. They get better.
- Human-Focused Adaptation: Played With — the "Pink Personal Hell" narrative follows a human straight one interacting with a pony funny-one, but Altering Fate is all about ponies.
- Humans Through Alien Eyes: Pinkie Pie refers to humans as "Minotaurs" and finds TV amusing.
- I Choose to Stay: Dominic decides to stay as Nickel Steel.
- Informed Flaw: Nickel Steel doesn’t think himself to be too capable with magic. Everyone else tries to tell him otherwise since his cutie mark is supposed to be a magic symbol not unlike Trixie or Twilight's. He seems to get better later on, no longer telling himself that he's just not very good with magic.
- In Medias Res: "Pink Personal Hell" is revealed to be this to "Altering Fate".
Word of God claims it's actually a subtle Shout-Out to Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World this way with two different narration styles.
- Odd Couple: The incredibly hyperactive Pinkie Pie and Butt-Monkey Dominic.
- Painting the Medium: Written in one big part, the "Pink Personal Hell" line is separated from the "Altering Fate" line by having the names of the lines bolded at the start of the scene(s). When Dominic goes to Equestria, rather than jumping to "Altering Fate", it jumps to "Pink Personal Hell" and "Altering Fate".
- The Reveal: Comes about 3/4s of the way in. Dominic is Nickel Steel
- Rhymes on a Dime: Zecora. It's also contagious.
- Rule of Funny: It's implied that Luna has a sense of humour and likes to correct people by using her royal voice... just because she finds it funny.
- Running Gag:
- Full Beats eating large amounts of food or stealing it when people aren’t looking.
- Gummy likes to bite onto Dominic.
- Nickel Steel having problems with stairs.
- Sequel Hook: It's implied at the end that that there will be future adventures in Ponyville, as well as relief that the mirror was not discovered by someone else who did not have interests as altruistic as the princesses. While not entirely a sequel, "Burned Bridges" takes place in the same version of Ponyville. However it is very loosely connected to Pink Personal Hell.
- Shapeshifting: Draco Scales, who apparently is able to turn into a dragon. It's not technically explained how it is possible for him to do so in the main story, but the prequel explains it.
- Shout-Out:
- The style of narrative is a Shout-Out to Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World by Haruki Murakami.
- The term "Altering Fate" is a shout-out to The Vision of Escaflowne. The Escaflowne shout-outs continue when he assumes Dilandau is going to tackle him.
- Pinkie Pie says "Laughter is the very best medicine". Dominic responds with, "I'll remember that when my appendix bursts next week."
- Must... control... fist of death.
- Gummy's biting onto Dominic is a Shout-Out to FoxTrot, specifically the part where he tells Gummy to let go and then Gummy simply substitutes his finger for his nose.
- Unreliable Narrator: Dominic is likely to be one. He describes a group cutting him off and making him do the work, but when he gives the presentation (With an alligator stuck to his finger) they don't seem to be reacting with hatred. In fact, his exile is "self-imposed", implying that Dominic's problems were more from him just being an Extreme Doormat.
