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Beskar and Braids

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Beskar and Braids is a Star Wars fanfic written on Archive of Our Own by cousinD.

Who would have known it was dangerous for a Jedi's health to fight in the depths of a power generator? Obi-Wan certainly hadn't taken this measly detail in account, but that's fine, he's bringing Anakin and his master's body back to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, he can get treated there.

Except that the ship's hyperdrive doesn't work anymore, and a little ambush by pirates wind up them stranding them in the middle of nowhere. With his big brother figure injured and out of commission, little Anakin panics and sends a distress call for anyone to hear and rescue them.

The closest ship happens to be a Mandalorian vessel bearing Jaster Mereel, currently on the rise as the next Mandalore. Naturally he cannot do less than rescuing two distressed kids, and potentially adopt them while he's at it.

The Jedi Order just might have a problem with that. Or not.

Contains the following tropes

  • Accidental Proposal: Aware of the Mandalorian enjoyment for fighting and battle, Mace offers to spar with Jaster before having a discussion about how to best take care of Obi-Wan and Anakin. Cue Jaster swooning from the sheer romantism of a Jedi wanting to test his skill and raise ade with him.
  • Adaptational Dumbass: Nobody ever suspected Palpatine's true nature and agenda in canon until it was far too late to stop his plan from coming to fruition. Here, he allows his greed for powerful apprentices to overcome him when he meets Anakin and Obi-Wan, causing people to get smart to the fact he's bad news.
  • Amazon Chaser: Considering the importance of fighting in Mandalorian mores, their society has this as an expected standard. Cue a lot of fawning over the Jedi Masters when they visit.
  • Badass Bookworm: Jaster would rather eschew the party celebrating his kicking a challenger to the title of Mand'alor and read about archeological findings about ancient art instead.
  • Child Soldiers:
    • A deconstruction with Anakin who's absolutely not okay with blowing up the Trade Federation's mothership over Naboo and keeps having traumatized flashbacks when his surroundings get too noisy, such as fireworks at a festival.
    • Years after Melida/Daan finally stopped the unending civil war, Obi-Wan still has nightmares about the whole deal, and Jaster is deeply upset to learn children had to take arms in order to protect themselves from their parents.
  • Conditioned to Accept Horror:
    • As a child slave on Tatooine, Anakin's idea of a compliment is to tell Obi-Wan that he would make a lot of money as a Sex Slave.
    • Jedi are labouring under constant poverty due to the Senate granting them the barest minimum to fund the Temple, viewing actual food and beds as a luxury they only indulge when on a mission.
  • Culture Clash: A former child slave of Tatooine and a Jedi Padawan stumble head-first within Mandalorian space, that was inevitable. Satine as a Coruscant-raised young woman and Padmé as a Naboo queen later add to the mix.
  • Delicate and Sickly:
    • For a great deal of the story, Obi-Wan slowly declines from Arkhon poisoning courtesy of the battle in Naboo's power generator, and his Mandalorian watchers have to wait for the Jedi to send the cure in time.
    • Dealing with corrupt Senators for so long gave Mace an ulcer that couldn't be fully treated because the Jedi Temple couldn't access that kind of advanced healing. He winds up puking blood when he's offered an extremely spicy Mandalorian stew to eat and is brought to the infirmary in a hurry to finally fix the problem.
  • Demonic Possession: Palpatine manages to slip a piece of his essence within his secretary in order for her body to infiltrate Mandalore, and can jump between hosts. Of course, it tends to be so harsh on the host body that it leads to death, but who cares?
  • Drives Like Crazy: Dooku would like for everyone to know he never crashed a ship when he was driving it. By the way, why is Mace turning green and warning people to never let him be a pilot?
  • Heritage Disconnect: With the Duke Kryze insisting to raise her on Coruscant with pacifist ideals, Satine is deeply insecure about her ability to ever understand the Mandalorian people or having any right to call herself Mandalorian. Jaster finds it rather saddening and gently pushes her to learn more about the culture to alleviate her unease.
  • I'm Taking Her Home with Me!: A Mandalorian tenet is to adopt any cute kid able to threaten you with a blaster or a knife. However, it's given a more sinister angle with Herna as she's fanatically bent on having Obi-Wan as her foundling, when he's already happy and well-cared with the Jedi and later Jaster.
  • Innocent Fanservice Girl: Mace, Plo and Dooku — Obi-Wan didn't have the time to warn them the Mandalorian culture is extremely body-shy and views baring any skin beyond the hands and face as indecent, leading people to drool over their wrists. Quinlan thinks it's absolutely hilarious.
  • I Want Grandkids: When Jango threatens to adopt three millions foundlings with nary a warning, Jaster's reaction is far from dread.
  • Ma'am Shock: Dooku is quite miffled by Jango respectfully calling him "Honored Elder''. Surely he's not that old at barely seventy-three?
  • Moving Beyond Bereavement: Qui-Gon's untimely demise at Darth Maul's hands shape a major part of the story, as his lineage is obviously struggling in the wake of his departure to mourn and get used to his absence.
  • Oblivious to Love:
    • Obi-Wan has studied flirting as a diplomatic tool and distraction so he can identify the markers, but he assumes it's never serious. Satine is rather dismayed about it.
    • Mace is even worse than Obi-Wan as he didn't took the seduction course at all. Cue Accidental Proposal and his utter bafflement when a Mando lady offers to polish his lightsaber.
  • Our Nudity Is Different: Mandalorians don bodysuits covering them fully except for the face and the hands, deeming more exposure of skin obscene. Jaster is scandalized by Obi-Wan rolling up his sleeves above the elbow, Satine's handmaid refused to let her wear a knee-length sundress when the young Duchess first arrived on Mandalore, and more than a few people are drooling over the sight of Mace's wrist.
  • Papa Wolf:
    • Jaster leaps on the opportunity to rescue two helpless kids from a malfunctioning ship and ensure their safety until their guardians come to bring them home. He's also infuriated by Satine's advisor seeking to isolate and groom her, and disapproves of fourteen years old Padmé having to mantle a queen's duties and responsibilities when she ought to enjoy her teenagehood.
    • Nothing will keep Dooku away from his grandpadawans. When he learns a crazy Mando is targeting Obi-Wan, he coldly concludes murder will send a strong message that you don't mess with a Jedi kid.
    • Yoda outright dismisses the newly elected Chancellor's demand for two Jedi younglings — Yoda's own great-padawans — to visit him without a chaperone, and proceeds to uproot the whole Jedi Order because one politician thinking himself entitled to their children won't fly at all.
  • Pedophilia Is a Special Kind of Evil: Oh yes. The Jedi Order is ready to evacuate the Temple and flee Coruscant entirely over the new Chancellor wanting some time alone with Anakin and Obi-Wan, both underage according Jedi criteria, and Lubek splattering Satine and Anakin with pink paint is seen as unforgivable.
  • Pink Is Erotic: A Mandalorian's idea of intimacy with their significant other is painting each other's faces with pink pigment. When Lubek attempts to apply pink paint on Satine's face and splatters Anakin while doing so, every Mandalorian in the palace basically treats that as sexual assault.
  • Pregnant Badass: Satine's handmaid Nole goes ballistic on a Death Watch fighter, half-mangling the dude while she scolds him for assaulting a delicate, pregnant lady such as her. Obi-Wan actually ponders intervening to save the terrorist from her wrath.
  • Protocol Peril: Mace, Plo and Dooku are hell-bent on avoiding any kind of provokation regarding the Mandalorians, since they historically opposed the Jedi Order a great many times and are currently detaining two of their younglings. Fortunately, Jaster is quite the relaxed fellow and opened to explain a fumble.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure: Goran Pav. For all he's The Fundamentalist, he nonetheless believes Jaster Mereel has earned the seat of Mand'alor by his own merit, firmly disagrees with Death Watch's terrorist agenda and tries to remind Herna she cannot take a foundling as her own if he's already cared for.
  • Shipper on Deck: Anakin doesn't really get love courtesy of being nine years old, but he can see Satine is in love with Obi-Wan and isn't opposed to them becoming a couple. Following Mace's Accidental Proposal, he swiftly enlists Obi-Wan and Satine to help the Jedi Master and Jaster to properly court each other.
  • Silk Hiding Steel: For all she favours diplomacy and pacifism over fighting, Satine nonetheless remains a force to be reckoned with as she politely and staunchly refuses to back down from allying with Jaster in spite of her advisor dismissing and insulting her decision, or remaining at a school rigged with explosives until everyone else has been safely evacuated because she knows the terrorist won't dare to risk her life.
  • Simple Solution Won't Work: When it becomes clear that Tor Vizsla won't stop harassing and murdering the Jedi Order for keeping the Darksaber out of his hands, Satine suggests to merely give him the weapon. The Jedis are horrified by the idea, since a lightsaber is just as sacred to them as beskar armor is to Mandalorians — relinquishing the Darksaber would be spiting on the original wielder's soul.
  • Superhuman Trafficking: Jedi Padawans and younglings are heavily chaperoned because the Order is horrendously aware of the temptation their Force-sensitivity is for greedy people.
  • Take Care of the Kids: Dooku thinks he's dreaming of a memory in which Qui-Gon is beseeching him to babysit a young Obi-Wan while the Knight is busy on a mission — only for Qui-Gon to veer off the script and ask if Dooku can take care of "the boys", prompting the aged Jedi to realize this isn't exactly a dream.
  • Traumatic Haircut: Herna outright rips Obi-Wan's Padawan braid to sever the blatant link with the Jedi Order. Since a Padawan's braid is meant to be cut by their Master as they officially are acknowledged as a Knight, it's an horrific experience for Obi-Wan.
  • Yandere: Herna got a glimpse of Obi-Wan in a spaceport and decided she had to steal him as her foundling, in spite of all the hints pointing at him being perfectly happy with the Jedi Order. She sabotages the hyperdrive to strand him in space and give her the opportunity to kidnap him, throws a fit at the idea of another person becoming his Parental Substitute, discards her armor to approach him under a disguise and won't balk at using Anakin as hostage to achieve her goal. Her Tribe's Goran concludes she went too far and names her dar'manda for her unbridled obsession.

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