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Drinking Game / The Simpsons

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If you played by all the rules here, your heart too would fail in this manner.

  • Take a drink every time you notice that the episode's plot changed.
  • Every time Homer says "D'oh!", or Screams Like a Little Girl, drink.
    • Likewise, drink if he says, "WOO HOO!" or "WHY YOU LITTLE...!" and strangles Bart.
    • Same goes for "Mmmm... donuts..." and/or that drooling noise he makes.
    • Drink whenever he drinks alcohol or eats donuts.
  • Take a drink every time Homer is injured in some way.
    • Take two drinks every time Homer dies during the Couch Gags and Treehouse of Horror segments.
    • Drink every time he delves into a continuity-laden rant that somehow delves into the realm of the Metaphorgotten. Take an extra finger if the rant calls back to an occupation/crazy scheme that occurred that very season.
    • If, in seasons 9-12, Homer is seen holding a humorous pennant, take a shot. If it's somehow plot-related, take an additional finger.
  • Take two drinks if a character other than Homer says "D'oh!".
    • Take three drinks if the character is not a Simpson.
  • Take a shot for every item a repo man isn't supposed to take takes.
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  • Every time Marge does her frustrated murmur, drink.
  • Every time Marge is a killjoy, take a drink. Drink the whole bottle if this habit of hers is lampshaded (ex. everybody turns to see if Marge will naysay the idea of a casino in "$pringfield") or is central to the plot (ex. "Bart After Dark" or "Bart's Inner Child").
  • Every time Barney burps, drink.
  • Every time a celebrity does a guest voice on the show.
    • Take two fingers if it's obvious the voice is a celebrity or not.
    • Take another drink if a character on the show addresses the celebrity by name and occupation.
    • Take a shot if the celebrity's appearance is a cameo (ex. Metallica or Cindi Lauper). Take two shots if the appearance is short but helps the plot (ex. Elton John, Paul McCartney). Down the whole bottle if the whole episode revolves around the guest appearance (ex. Dustin Hoffman, Michael Jackson, Lady Gaga, Elon Musk).
  • Every time Nelson says "Ha-ha!", drink.
    • Extra rule: If watching the first 5 seasons and this gag comes in through an odd variation.
    • If the laugh follows him beating someone up, take a second drink.
    • Take an additional drink if Laser-Guided Karma gets him right after he mocks someone.
    • Take a shot every time Nelson showcases some Hidden Depths. Down the bottle if the whole episode revolves around them.
  • Take a shot every time Kent Brockman does Kent Brockman News.
  • Take a shot every time the writers make a gag about how they will never say where Springfield is located.
    • Take a shot every time the structure of the town is changed for the sake of a gag (like Moe's Bar and the church being within running distance of each other in The Movie).
    • Down the whole bottle every time things are added to the town that are utterly nonsensical to the point of borderline Eldritch (such as West Springfield being a desert three times the size of Texas in "Half-Decent Proposal").
  • Take a shot every time there is a gag that demonstrates that's every single business in Springfield is either already Incompetence, Inc. or will be in due time. Recurrently-appearing businesesses like Krusty Burger and the nuclear plant will get as many shots as gags appear in an episode. Take two shots if the incompetence gag is life-threatening in any way, shape or form.
  • Every time Mr. Burns says "Excellent".
  • Any time, Smithers or Patty's homosexuality is brought up, drink.
  • Every time the Comic Book Guy says "Worst (insert word) ever", take a shot.
    • Two shots if it's "Best (insert word) ever" instead.
  • Every time Dr. Nick cheers "Hi everybody!", drink.
    • Two sips if it's an odd variation.
  • Every time Krusty says, "HEY, HEY!" or "Hi, Kids!" followed by his goofy laugh, drink.
    • If this is almost immediately followed by his usual crabass attitude, either by time skip or otherwise, take two more drinks. Take two more drinks if the gag involves him him being cruel to his co-workers.
    • Take a shot if Krusty is a corporate whore in some way. Take two shots if the gag involves something life-threatening in any way, shape or form (such as Krusty answering to a Noodle Incident). Gags regarding his horrifyingly unsanitary mismanagement of Krusty Burger will get shots from this and the "incompetence gag" bullet point above.
  • Every time Sideshow Bob says, "Hello, Bart." drink.
    • If someone screams "Sideshow Bob!" in fright, drink.
    • If Bob tries to kill Bart, take two drinks
      • If Bob tries to kill anyone else (Including other Simpsons) take three drinks.
      • Alternatively, if Sideshow Bob tries to help Bart, take the bottle and drink every drop.
  • Drink for every one of Ned Flanders's goofy sayings.
  • Every time Abe goes to sleep in the middle of telling a long story, drink.
  • Drink every time Duffman says "DUFFMAN!" or "OH YEAH!"
    • Take two shots if it's followed by a scene in which Duffman's speaking and acting in a normal way.
  • Every time Moe gets a prank call from Bart, drink.
    • Take two drinks if someone with the name Bart used actually answers.
  • Every time Mrs. Krabapple laughs ("Ha!"), drink.
  • Every time Mrs. Krabapple is mentioned in recent episodes, down your whole drink.
  • Every time there's a reference to Homer stealing Flanders' stuff, drink.
  • Every time Agnes Skinner yells, "Seymour!", drink.
    • Every time Seymour replies, "Yes, mother", or some variation, drink.
  • Every time Superintendent Chalmers comes in and yells, "SKINN-ER!", drink.
    • Take another drink if Skinner gasps, "Superintendent Chalmers!"
  • Every time Maggie sucks on her pacifier, drink.
    • Every time Maggie falls on her face.
  • Every time Maggie does something unusual, take three drinks. If it happens in a Treehouse of Horror episode, only take one drink.
  • For every Treehouse of Horror episode, drink every time Kang and/or Kodos make an appearance.
  • Drink for every single instance of comical death and/or violence in a Treehouse of Horror episode.
  • Take a drink for every film, TV special, etc. Troy McClure says you might remember him from.
  • If Milhouse's bed-wetting problem comes up, take a drink.
  • Take a drink if Apu says, "Thank you, come again!"
  • If Homer actually says "Let's all go out for frosty chocolate milkshakes!" or some variation, down a whole drink.
  • Take a drink if Dr. Hibbert laughs.
    • Take two if it's preceded by some sort of horrible news or inappropriate comment.
    • Take three drinks if Dr. Hibbert doesn't laughs at something (an additional finger if someone points this out is optional).
    • Take a drink every time Dr. Hibbert shows that he has a Morally Ambiguous Doctorate in any way, shape or form. Take two drinks if he is the Only Sane Man. In Bait-and-Switch gags, congrats, that means you must drink thrice.
  • Take a drink every time something bad happens to Hans Moleman. Take two drinks if the implication is that Hans died to his misfortune.
  • In "My Fair Laddy", take a drink every time the new gym coach says the word, "Bombardment!" If you take this one, make sure you have an ambulance nearby.
  • Take a drink if Sideshow Mel interjects with a hammy sentence.
  • Take a drink for every time Disco Stu says his name.
  • Take a drink for every child of Cletus that shows up in the episode you're watching.
  • Take a drink for every Non-Sequitur Ralph Wiggum says.
    • Down your drink if there isn't a non-sequitur.
  • Take a drink for every time Gil predicts/hopes that his luck is finally turning around. Take another if he refers to himself as "ol' Gil" in the process.
    • Take an additional drink if his luck only gets worse instead.
    • Take an additional drink if Gil admonishes himself for something he said/did out loud, possibly in front of people who really didn't need to hear it.
  • Take a drink for every time Moe wishes he were dead or that someone would kill him. Take another whenever he actually attempts suicide. (Use caution when watching the Christmas episode segment which is entirely about Moe being suicidal.)
  • Take a drink whenever Yes Guy says, "Eeye-e-e-es!"
  • Take a drink whenever a telephone hotline plays hold music that's extremely inappropriate for the crisis at hand.
  • Take a drink for every time Professor Frink makes one of his Jerry Lewis-like nonsense sounds.
  • Take a drink every time Patty or Selma mention MacGyver or Grandpa mentions Matlock, two if someone else mentions it.
  • Take a drink if Springfield Gorge is referenced or shown.
    • Down 3 while spinning if they make it across
  • Every time there's a Bland-Name Product mentioned or shown, such as Mapple, drink.
  • Take a drink for every instance of Biting-the-Hand Humor towards Fox (and/or as of now, Disney.
  • Take a drink every time there is a gag that references the fact the show has been running for a long time.
  • Take a drink every time something supernatural happens that's just a gag.
  • Take a drink every time someone mocks the fact cartoons are an allegedly cheaper medium and some gag happens that could be chalked to a cheap (or angry) production staff (ex. Ned getting voiced by The Other Darrin for a few seconds).
  • Take a shot if Lisa is reading a book. If there's a close-up of the book's cover, chug it.
  • Take a drink if the giant Olmec head (received as a gift from Mr. Burns) is shown.
  • Every time Burns says "Smithers, who is that (insert here)?" And Smithers says "that's Homer Simpson, sir, one of your (insert here) from Sector 7G", take a shot. Down an additional shot if Smithers references that Homer and Burns have interacted many times in the past.
    • You"ll be wasted during Who Shot Mr Burns.
  • In the early 2000s episodes, take a drink for every swipe at VeggieTales.
    • Take a drink every time Homer does something stupid. We sincerely recommend you do not use alcohol for this challenge.
      • Take a drink if Homer regrets his actions for any reason.
      • Down a bottle every time that stupid thing he does hurts someone else in any way, shape or form.
      • Down an additional bottle if that person getting hurt is a member of the family.
      • Down an additional bottle if there is an Inferred Holocaust from his action, and one more if it actually gets someone killed on screen.
      • Down as many shots as needed if Homer tries to make things right and bumbles along the way, and an additional bottle if Homer prefers to be an unapologetic Jerkass instead.
      • Down an additional bottle if Homer's actions make the other characters act like jerks as well.
      • Down an additional bottle if Homer's antics make Marge want to divorce him.
    • Down a bottle every time the Simpsons family goes someplace. Down an additional bottle if it's another country. Down a big glass if everybody celebrates going (take two if Lisa or some other shout "The Simpsons are going to (location)!!"). Down a bottle if Marge reminds the audience that her greatest dream is to travel to Paris.
    • Down half a bottle every time there is a Take That! to something or someone. Considering the Grammy Awards getting lambasted is a Running Gag, a very tall glass can be used instead for this particular example.
    • In the post-Seasonal Rot episodes, take a drink every time Ned is used as a strawman for religious fundamentalists. Screw it, the ambulance can't save you.
    • In the post-Seasonal Rot episodes, take a drink for any strawman representing conservative politics or religious fundamentalists that isn't Ned Flanders.
    • Every time you hear a wolf howl, or someone coughs when a crowd is quiet after a joke, take a drink.


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