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Disproportionate Retribution / Dan Vs.

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Only to Dan would a bad case of maple syrup justify icing over an entire country.

As a show with a Hair-Trigger Temper Villain Protagonist and Revenge as its main premise, Dan Vs. has many examples of Disproportionate Retribution.


Episode Premises:

  • In “The Wolfman,” it seems like Dan is doing everything in his power to kill the Wolfman just for getting his car scratched. Then at the end, it turns out everything he did was just to locate the Wolfman's car and scratch it in return. When a surprised Chris reveals that he thought Dan was going to do otherwise, a genuinely shocked Dan responds that killing him just for scratching his car is a bit extreme. That doesn’t change the fact Dan successfully shot the Wolfman with a silver arrow while pursuing him.
  • In “New Mexico,” Dan tries to blow up a hot air balloon festival because of a few minor inconveniences and a broken window (this was coincidentally tied to cults, but still). Elise goes one step further, stealing a UFO to wreak havoc over Santa Fe because her cotton candy was stolen by roadrunners and her balloon popped by a cactus.
  • Dan tries (and fails) to poison the animals at a nearby Animal Shelter, then successfully blows the location up (albeit letting the animals free) because the ruckus was keeping him up at night. Bear in mind, the shelter was there before he moved in.
  • Dan holds a grudge against Canada for producing a bad comic book, having annoying geese, and producing maple syrup, in which he got covered. Chris, meanwhile, is ashamed that his great grandfather was a yeti lover. As a result, the two destroy a weak spot in a glacier, covering the entire country in snow and ice, which they had not recovered from as of “Monster Under the Bed.”
  • “Traffic” sees Dan blow up a car dealership and release vertigo-inducing chemicals over the city because gridlock kept him from getting home in time to use the bathroom.
  • Because of a bad experience at “Ye Olde Shakespeare Dinner Theatre,” Dan seeks to shut the place down. This includes pouring soda down an actor’s ear (fully aware it will cause hospitalization) and inciting a riot.
  • Dan kidnaps the Commissioner of Baseball and is willing to break his legs (before it becomes unnecessary) because his favorite TV show was preempted by the World Series and his mirror was damaged by fans trying to catch a home-run. Worse yet, it turns out the Commissioner is a Nice Guy and fan of the same show, so he likely would have resolved both issues had Dan just asked nicely.
  • Dan mistakenly parks his car to be donated to the Salvation Armed Forces. As a result, he seeks to undermine their entire used car reissue program.
  • Despite George Washington being long dead, Dan tries to blow up Mount Vernon because he believes the late president fell a tree onto his car. Eventually, he settles for writing an embarrassing entry into his diary.
  • In “Technology,” Dan threatens the life of Steve Jobs equivalent Barry Ditmer over planned obsolescence, while Hiram, Barry’s former business partner, tries to kill him over lack of proper credit.
  • Dan attempts to get Elise’s parents arrested for being in the Mafia (false accusation), because their visit with Elise means Chris is unable to go to the Renaissance Fair with Dan.
  • From “The Family Thanksgiving,” "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. If you can't join 'em ... BURN THEIR HOUSE TO THE GROUND."
  • While the Mall Santa is a Jerkass, that doesn’t necessitate Dan trying to kill him with sharpened candy canes. When Chris calls Dan out on choosing petty revenge over his cat, Mr. Mumbles, Dan pretends to go along, only to fell a tree onto the Mall Santa.
  • In "Neighbors," Dan tries to run his neighbors out of their new home because he believes their kind nature is simply a front for more devious intentions (eventually determining cannibalism the most likely), and also because their pie splattered onto his car (which he dropped the pie on). While this response could make sense if he couldn’t get the police involved, Dan’s evidence is flimsy at best, and in fact, the neighbors really were nice people.
  • Dan attempts to undermine the foundation of a dance hall because of a competition taking away his time with Chris.
  • Dan verbally lashes out at a bank employee, breaks bullet-proof glass with his head, steals pens, and later, pulls a full-on bank heist. Why? Because the fees for five dollar withdrawals went up by fifty cents. (Granted, he only intended to rob enough to compensate for the fee, but he still did a lot of damage in doing so.)
  • Dan, upset by Hortense’s marriage with Jeremiah Burger, decides to crash and ruin the wedding. While it was entirely reasonable to be concerned with Jeremiah’s long string of failed marriages, this was not the inciting information, and Dan wouldn’t let it go after the issue was addressed.
  • Dan is right to be upset with Gigundo-Mart because of the traffic, and as seen later, predatory pricing and Chris’s shopping addiction. This does not justify his attempt to blow the place up.
  • Chris, in his titular episode, decides to keep a ray gun he won in a contest for himself, but allows Dan to see it anytime. Dan’s response is to try and steal it, taking rather extreme measures.
  • The most extreme one happens in "Anger Management", where Dan gets into a US military base and almost launches a bunch of nuclear missiles that would wipe out all of humanity. Why? An unspecified incident where a family of squirrels did something that annoyed him.
  • Because Dan is unhappy with Burgerphile replacing their fries with vegetables, Dan tries to eradicate all vegetables from the city, uncaring for the difficulty this causes for the city’s vegans.
  • In “The Superhero,” Terrifiguy destroys Dan’s car through carelessness. While Dan is understandably angry, this does not justify holding the fireworks factory hostage, as no one there had anything to do with it.
  • Ultimately subverted, at least by Dan's standards, in "Wild West Town." While he does go on a ridiculous revenge scheme against a disappointing wild west theme park because they won't refund his money, he eventually ceases his hostilities and lets them keep his money because he feels the things he got to do during his revenge scheme, such as a bank robbery and a showdown at high noon, were well worth the money he paid.

Other Examples:

  • The librarian from “New Mexico” agrees to help Dan and Chris get even with New Mexico, but first expects them to kill the man his wife is cheating with.
  • Elise’s response to Chris being hit with an epee in “Ye Olde Shakespeare Dinner Theatre” is to send the offender to a work camp in North Korea.
  • The barber from "The Barber" definitely qualifies. First, he responds to learning Dan is dating his daughter by giving Dan a Traumatic Haircut. And after Dan retaliates by giving the barber a Traumatic Haircut of his ownnote , his response is to try and kill Dan!
  • Because Dan attempts to stop Chris from participating in a dance off, which Chris wants no part in regardless, Elise sends Dan to a ghost town, presumably to die.
  • The Imposter, in his debut, attempted to steal Dan’s identity, only to be outwitted. In his return, he is solely focused on getting even with Dan - calling him at all hours, tracking his every move, and planting a transmitter on his tooth so Dan would hear his voice without witnesses. This successfully drives Dan mad, and eventually leads to his arrest.
  • In “Chris,” Elise’s parents, dissatisfied with their daughter’s marriage to Chris, have shown willingness to have him killed and actively attempt to ship him to a ball bearing factory in Siberia. Also, Chris’s response to Dan’s attempted theft is to give away everything Dan owns, including his cat, Mr. Mumbles.
  • In "Lemonade Stand Gang," Dan's idea of getting even against The Lemonade Stand Gang for beating up and extorting money from himself and Chris numerous times is only to smash their bikes so they can't get to his neighborhood as easily. The kids retaliate by blowing up Chris' car; Elise, who finally takes them seriously after previously mocking Chris for being beat up by fifth graders, starts planning to make them "disappear" by sending them all to a weapons factory in North Korea to do sweatshop labor, where they will never be heard from again.
  • “Anger Management”
    • Inverted in the cold open. Dan expects to be charged for treason and attempted mass murder but he only gets mandatory anger management classes. The government doesn't want the world to know just how close it came to nuclear annihilation. They especially don't want anyone to know that one angry little moron acting alone managed to infiltrate NORAD and acquire nuclear launch codes.
    • Played straight by the members of the anger management class, who, incited by Dan, destroy Amber’s car because her car alarm went off.
    • Also played straight by Amber, who fills a man’s car with trash over a piece of litter, ruins her sister’s wedding over a long past spill, and tries to kill Chris for leaving wrappers on the grass.
  • In "The Common Cold," a scientist infects Dan with a lethal virus that nearly kills him just because Dan called him a geek and stole lab equipment.
  • Terrifiguy from “The Superhero” has every right to be annoyed by Dan wasting time that could be spent on other crimes. However, this doesn’t justify his (interrupted) attempt to send him to the never dimension, as opposed to just jail.

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