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We're All Going to Die Young Anyway is a sci-fi novel by Strix Obscuro, currently in development.

In a not-too-distant future, the Sand Chapel serves as high-security prison for superpowered teenage delinquents. Of course, "delinquency" is very broadly defined, and so the prison is brimming with kids whose crimes range from minor vandalism to mass murder. Every now and then, the rules are relaxed and the kids are given the run of the main holding chamber, as a way to test the guards' training and to demonstrate to the kids that they cannot be left to their own devices.


During one of these breaks, prisoner Halfwit accidentally leads a group of inmates outside of holding, and they soon find themselves unable to return before the chamber is locked down again. Fearing that they will die if they turn themselves in, the kids decide to make an attempt to escape the Sand Chapel entirely, but must work together to get past the security.

This book contains examples of:

  • Anyone Can Die: Halfwit and his crew are all considered expendable by the management at Sand Chapel.
  • Blessed with Suck: Sadsack is an empath. She has some control over her powers, but using them causes her to absorb other people's emotions.
  • Dehumanizing Insult: Every prisoner at the Sand Chapel gets an unflattering nickname in order to remind them that the Chapel hates them.
  • Elemental Shapeshifter: Bedwetter is capable of assuming a liquid form. The tricky part is making himself solid again.
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  • Making a Splash: Bedwetter's water-based powers have all kinds of useful applications, but he's too focused on maintaining molecular coherence to really explore them.
  • Meaningful Name: All the main characters have nicknames that sort of describe their powers - Sadsack is an empath, Halfwit can possess people, Dumbass feels no pain, etc.
  • Sugary Malice: The Warden, being inspired by Granny Goodness, radiates malevolence even as she speaks affectionately toward her "little dears".
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Example of: