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An unpublished comic series made by yours truly. What started out as a series of simple Dexter's Laboratory fancomics when I was 9, turned into an actual series with loads of characters, crazy plots, and two or three jokes a page.

In a nutshell, it's a cartoonish comedy-dominant Horror Comedy.

In a more detailed explanation, the comic follows the adventures of three siblings; Lovable Alpha Bitch D.D., Deadpan Snarker Luke and Insufferable Genius Dexter. And yes, D.D. and Dexter are from Dexter's Laboratory (with their personalities exaggerated to absurd levels.), while Luke is an Author Avatar (one of two; I'll explain that later). Together, they form a group called D.L.D., which solves various supernatural cases, for just 60 dollars a client! The monsters of the week range from vampires, werewolves and zombies to man-eating sofas, soul-sucking ice-cream, haunted girls' bathrooms and the such.


Also, all the characters are LGBT+.

This comic, with its 20 year run, has used many tropes, including, but not limited to...

  • Artificial Afterlife: In Heaven is a Place on Earth, a tribute episode to Black Mirror: San Junipero, Dexter creates a digital afterlife in the form of a beach town where ghosts can upload themselves into it and spend eternity in a virtual heaven. The only ghost not willing to upload herself is the Lady in Grey, whose lover the Lady in Lightgreen immediately immerses herself into the program. In the end, the Lady in Grey uploads herself and the two Ladies spend the rest of forever together.
  • Attack of the Killer Whatever: A killer stone wall, Killer Rabbit, killer donuts, donuts that make you kill, killer Barbie doll (and later a killer teddy bear), killer snowmen, the sofa and the ice-cream mentioned above, and so on...
  • Advertisement:
  • Better Than a Bare Bulb: Lampshade hanging by the motherload.
  • Bloodier and Gorier: Only in Bloody Hilarious form; if there's blood, chances are something un-serious is the cause of it.
  • But for Me, It Was Tuesday: A rare non-villainous version:
    Woman:D.L.D.! How great it is to see you again! Remember me?
    D.D.: (stares blankly)
    Woman: You know, you rescued me and the tenants of our building from those zombies? Everybody almost died?
    D.D.: (still stares blankly)
    D.D.: Look, lady, the day you and your tenants were attacked by zombies was the scariest day of your lives... but for us, it was Tuesday!
  • Cast Full of Gay: There is one confirmed gay character (Luke), one asexual character (Dr. Apartheid), seven lesbian characters (Lisa & Ammy, the Lady in Grey & the Lady in Lightgreen, Kittenwoman & Ally Lizzen and Lucy) and one transgender character (Zack); everybody else is either bisexual or heteroflexible..
  • Compressed Adaptation: The Marvel comic book miniseries House of M ran for 8 issues - which is about 220 pages, while the D.L.D. Parody Episode of it, called House of D, has 45 pages.
    • In it, Veronika goes crazy and creates a reality in which the D.L.D. rule the world. In the end, she utters the words "No more D.L.D.", and creates a world where there is no D.L.D. or any D.L.D.-type group whatsoever (the next episode brings them back though).
    • Likewise, The Infinity Gauntlet ran for 6 issues, which is about 256 pages, while the Parody Episode of it, The Infinity Fingerless Glove, also has 45 pages.
  • Darker and Edgier: Subverted. Yes, there's swearing, gore and sex, but only in the form of Precision F-Strike, Bloody Hilarious and Naked People Are Funny.
  • Downer Ending + Gainax Ending + Tearjerker + Kill 'Em All + Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies: All of these tropes apply to episode 120, They Luke'd Up and Screamed; Luke attemmpts to kill the entire cast so he could take over the comic and make it better. Unfortunately, things do not go well, as everybody (including Luke) dies under a collapsing building and gets Killed Off for Real. In the next episode, we are introduced to a new cast of characters, a new D.L.D., and everything seems just fine... until the old cast rises from their graves and they are not happy with their replacements...
Thankfully, though, they become alive again, and the status quo is somewhat restored.
  • Eldritch Location: The Demented Dimension: It's a vast desolate desert-like world where everything is in one color (which randomly changes), and is home to weird bug-like creatures. And let's not forger the resident...
    • Eldritch Abomination: A giant worm-like monster. It's as big as a skyscraper. It has millions of tentacles. And also, 30 mouths. Later on it turns out there's more of them, though in different sizes.
    • The episode How the Demented Dimension Came to Be reveals the Dimension is actually a Patchwork World Gone Horribly Wrong made by a team of mad scientists and all its residents and monsters are the result of mutations and inbreeding.
    • Sex Tourism: Sex in the Demented Dimension has the D.L.D., with no other option to make money, open the Dimension to straight women and gay men who are willing to pay money to have sex with the Dimension's locals, who don't care about the gender of their partner.
  • "Freaky Friday" Flip: In the episode Weirdo Wednesday the League of Extraordinary Villains, D.LD. and S.G.T. swap bodies. What follows is:
    • While in the Lady in Grey's body, Dr. Apartheid can't stop touching himself.
    • Tina in Luke's body rapes him while he's in her body.
    • D.D. and Sally mutilate each others bodies, starting with Sally shaving of D.D.'s hair and D.D. making a tattoo on Sally's head that says "I ♥ cock", and ends with D.D. and Sally chopping off their limbs (and Sally's head).
  • Future Me Scares Me: The episode Stories from the Future - Part 2 in which the D.L.D. are visited by their 13-year old selves who have traveled from the past (namely, Part 1 which was made 10 years earlier). The younger D.L.D. were not happy with the many changes over the years and attempted to go back in the past and make sure to change the future, only to have their memories of the encounter erased.
  • Gag Series: Zig-zagged. At first it was fairly light, then became more and more sillier to the point of absurdity, now throwing in some seriousness to all that sillyness.
  • Gainaxing: Any girl with visible boobs. And yes, this is possible in a comic!
  • Improbably Female Cast: 33 females, 16 males.
  • Loads and Loads of Characters: 49 characters and that doesn't even include the recurring extras and characters that appeared more than once...
  • Log Fic: The episode The Great D.L.D. Group Chat of July 21st 2019 is written and drawn in the form of a group chat on Tina's phone between a majority of the characters.
    • TikTok Schlock offers a variation, as it's about Tina going through the characters' videos on TikTok.
    • D.D.'s Lexicon is another variation, as it's written and drawn in the form of a lexicon D.D. made and gave her friends when she was 14.
  • The Lost Lenore: Luke's dead crush Prescott, a tragic case of Incompatible Orientation. Their relationship was the center of these episodes:
    • The Long-ass Goodbye
    • Greetings from Lower Ann
    • One More Long-ass Goodbye
    • Broken off Chalk
  • Milestone Celebration:
    • Kids Gotten Badder: A Decade of Shits - The 10th anniversary special; the D.L.D. remember their "Most ____ Moments" and the episode ends with them committing suicide.
    • The D.L.D. 20th Anniversary Special, in which every single character remembers their favorite moment from the series.
  • Monochrome Casting: Out of the 48 characters, we have only six non-white characters.
  • Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: The episode Robotic Lesbian Vampire Cheerleaders from Mars (and the sequel My Babysitter's a Robotic Lesbian Vampire Cheerleader from Mars). They're robot girls... who are lesbians,... who suck blood... and they're cheerleaders... and they come from Mars.
  • No Fourth Wall: None whatsoever. Characters refer to previous events as "several episodes ago", frequently interact with the Author, and do stuff like hit each other with their word balloons, skip in and out of panels, snark about the episode's quality, and so on.
  • Only Six Faces
  • Queer Romance: Here are the the episodes focusing on LGBT+ romance:
    • Medusa's Brokeback Mountain - Luke and Zarry Mopper have a shortlived romance, while Medusa terrorizes Hugwartz.
    • Nice Day for a Crazy Wedding - The wedding of the Lady in Grey and the Lady in Lightgreen.
    • Nice Day for Another Crazy Wedding - The wedding of Lisa and Ammy.
    • LGBTD.L.D. - An Omnibus consisting of these short stories:
      • Lisa and Ammy go to a karaoke bar where they sing love songs to each other.
      • Zack starts taking testosterone and gets a penis transplant provided by Dr. Apartheid.
      • Kittenwoman saves Ally Lizzen from the KKK.
      • Luke gets addicted to Skam and dreams of finding his own significant other.
      • The immortal asexual Dr. Apartheid must face all the people throughout history that had a sexual interest in him.
    • Honeymoon in the Demented Dimension - Lisa and Ammy's... well, the title speaks for itself.
    • Call Your Girlfriend - Just as they reunite with Goth Girl and Sally, Bludweiser and Luke rekindle their romance.
    • Our Polyamorous Lesbian Rivals -The S.G.T. enter a polyamorous relationship with each other.
    • Darla Off the Shits - Parody of Leah on the Offbeat featuring Darla.
    • We, Thompson - Thompson gets it on with his evil clone.
    • Vicky Loves Vicky - Two versions of Vicky... get it on.
    • But I'm a Goth Cheerleader - In an Affectionate Parody of But I'm a Cheerleader, Tiffany the goth cheerleader is sent to a conversion camp where she not only falls in love with one of the counselors, but the two of them start a revolution.
    • Just Experimenting... Unless..? - D.L.D.'s parents remember their same-sex relationships in college. Was it just experimenting or something more?
    • Thought It Was Done But I Guess It's Never Really Over - Tina and Luke's Distaff Counterpart Lucy start a relationship.
    • LuNa - A chronicle of Lucy and Tina's new life in the Alternate Universe version of Metropolis, River City.
    • Her and I - A chronicle of Kittenwoman and Ally Lizzen's life during the Coronavirus pandemic.
  • Rage Against the Author: The characters openly hate their Author.
  • Ripped from the Headlines: Real life events like the 2009 swine flu or the 2015 Syrian refugee crisis appear in the comic. Special mention goes to the "Coronavirus Arc":
    Tina: What if I had really died?
    Luke: Then I would have buried you so I could dance on your grave.
    • You Can Go Home; Luke and Tina no longer have the Coronavirus, and return to Metropolis.
    • We Go Together; Dr. Kvasimodo of the League of Extraordinary Villains has Coronavirus, so he arrives in the Demented Dimension along with the rest of the League, even though none of them can get infected (one being immortal, and the other two being ghosts.)
    • Get This Corona Party Started; Milly, Lilly and Filly organize a Corona Party which Kittenwoman puts a stop to.
    • Her and I; a series of videochats between Kittenwoman and Ally Lizzen during quarantine, at least until their school reopens.
  • Trapped in Another World: The Demented Dimension arc mentioned above. Later, New D.L.D. & Co. get trapped in another world (which was more like a Alternate Universe of ours), and then all characters are back where they belong.
  • Self-Deprecation: Every once in a while, a character would bitch about how the episode sucks, the comic sucks, the Author sucks, and sometimes all three (with many variations).
  • Spin-Off: Several, some of which never got past 10 episodes:
  • The End: The "The end!" tag at the end of every episode which changes its font and/or look with every appearance.
  • The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You: Some episodes end with either the Monster of the Week or someone else attacking the reader.
  • Tome of Eldritch Lore: During the first episodes there was a mini-arc concerning the Four Books of Evil, each of which, when read, brings a huge disaster (like raising the dead, for instance). There was also a Fifth Book that when read releases a demon that brings evil and doom... through neverending parties (which is why that book is discredited).
  • Un-Cancelled: I tried to give it up seven times... only to continue with it afterwards. This comic really grew on me.
  • Villains Out Shopping: The members of the League of Extraordinary Villains, when they're not planning on how to kill the D.L.D., can usually be found doing stuff like shopping for groceries, playing Dance Dance Revolution, playing Twister,...
  • World of Snark
  • Writing by the Seat of Your Pants: Since the beginning, and to this day.
  • X Meets Y: At first the comic started out as an idea of combining Dexter's Laboratory with the horror of Dylan Dog and the humor of Garfield. However, as I grew, so did my creative influences, and the series became so much more.

Wham Episodes
  • Wham Episode: Hoo boy..:
    • Episode 50, D.L.D. and Craizie & Maddy VS the League of Extraordinary Villains is not only a crossover with another one of my comics (sadly, short-lived), but also the longest and most action-filled episode at the time.
    • Episode 79, D.L.D.: Alien force in which it's revealed Luke is actually one of billion alien clones whose boss (the main alien) plans to take over the world. Betrayal, destruction and incredibly silly aliens vs humans battles ensue. In the end, all the aliens are destroyed, except for one, another Luke clone whom D.D. and Dexter decide to take in as a replacement for their brother... except, he has evil plans of his own. Told you it was crazy.
    • Episode 120, They Luke'd up and screamed; see Downer Ending above.
    • Episode 121, Dramatic entrance! Enter Zoë! which gives us the new cast and the old zombie cast.
    • Episode 132, Happy birthday, Zoë; Klara's old Friendly Enemy Damjanka Jadranov returns as a second Big Bad and Jasmine reveals she's a robot.
    • Episode 139, The last wave; starts out like any usual episode, until the end where the old zombie cast accidentally reveal themselves to the new one, and vowing to have their revenge, thus adding a whole new level of conflict to the "zombies vs newbies" arc. It is also when the relationship between Bludweiser and Vicky starts to grow, and also a Klara/Thompson/Yoko Love Triangle begins. Of these three events, only the latter two are being Played for Laughs (meaning no actual drama will come out of them.)
    • Episode 150, Battle ROFLMAO; the old zombie cast comes up with a device that can create a portal that leads into other dimensions and universes, which they plan to use on the new cast and finally get rid of them. Once again, things go horribly right; not only are the newbies sent through the portal (except for Thompson), but so are all the old characters, with no knowing where they ended up (the next episode reveals they're stuck in a weirld world known as the Demented Dimension). With the device accidentally destroyed, Thompson is left to himself, having to figure out a way to bring them back.
    • Episode 162, New D.L.D.; everybody manages to escape the Demented Dimension, but... the old cast is back in our world, while the newbies are stranded and stuck in an Alternate Universe similar to our world.
    • Episode 164, The Rise and Fall of the D.L.D.; the newbies manage to come back to our world, and a big bloody battle between them and the oldies breaks out. In the end, the oldies and the newbies are mashed into a single cast of characters.
    • Episode 183, Trouble in the Opposite Sex Universe; everybody meets their opposite sex selves from another universe, and some, including Marion, hook up with them. In the end, the portal between the two worlds is closed forever, and later on, Marion's female version, Marian, turns out to be pregnant.
    • Episode 186, Boy Meets Ghoul reveals who the mother of Thompson's kids from the future is, and episode 189 The Revealing has her and Thompson meeting each other.
    • Episode 190, Clip-show with a Surprise ends with the S.G.T. releasing a tell-all book that reveals all the bad the things the D.L.D. has done (like abandoning the newbies in an alternate universe and actively trying to get rid of them), causing the D.L.D. to lose their job.
      • Episode 203, however, restores the status quo; thanks to the S.G.T.'s inability to catch a monster that killed 17 people which the D.L.D. later successfully kill, the D.L.D. have their job back, while the S.G.T. are again their unsuccessful competition.
    • Episode 192, Greetings from the Demented Dimension; all the newbies open a travel agency where they take people on tours through the Demented Dimension. In the end, the Syrian refugees want to go live there, given they can no longer go back to their own countries and they're not that wanted everywhere else; so all the newbies take the refugees to their new life in the Dimension where they will protect and take care of them, and only come back to our world once or twice a week to get supplies and necessities.
    • Episode 209 has Luke leaving the D.L.D. to live with his Distaff Counterpart Lucy in the Opposite Sex Universe.
      • 22 episodes later, he comes back.
    • Episodes 223-225 saw the departure of many characters: the League of Extraordinary Villains, Walter van Heavenwing and Veronika Oštrić were Put on a Bus, Maiya got into a Bus Crash, Hunter and Day were Ret-Gone and Thompson was Driven to Suicide.
    • Episode 240, Our Girl Zoë; a big company builds a mall and apartment buildings in the Demented Dimension, thus making it available to the general public.
    • Episode 244 however, has a giant monster killing the Syrian refugees and destroy their town, forcing the newbies to leave the Demented Dimension and go back to our world.
    • Episode 256, How It Used To Be, has Zoe wishing Thompson was alive and the wish is fulfilled by making all the events after episode 120 never happen.
    • Episode 260, Return of the Written-off, has Lisa and Tina awake and overturn Zoe's wish, thus bringing things back to how they were.
    • Special Episode 150, The Terry Family Reunion, sees the cosmic entity known as Nameless revive Thompson, Maiya, Hunter and Day, as per Zoe wishing so (and in exchange for half a KitKat).
    • Episode 278, The Return of Episode 120, has Walter and Veronika uncover an ancient artifact that brings them into an alternate reality where, once again, everything after episode 120 never happened.
    • Episode 281, however, ends with the D.L.D., S.G.T. and Lisa & Ammy being trapped in the Demented Dimension and getting eaten by its monsters, while Walter and Veronika return to their reality.
    • Special Episode 165, We, The Kids from Veronika's Cabin; seeing as Vicky is depowered and Stuart and Anisha no longer have a legal guardian, Child Services takes them and they are adopted by none other than The Addams Family.
    • Episode 300, The Truth About D.L.D., in which the D.L.D. die while battling a monster, and learn in the afterlife that they're the latest in a long line of trios whose task is to protect people from evil. Before the episode ends, they even see their successors; three children much like how they were in the beginning.
However, the following episode, One and Only D.L.D., restores the status quo; as it turns out, neither one of D.L.D.'s replacements wants to do their job, which is why they're brought back to life.
  • Episode 302, That Meddling Lucy has Lucy travel back to episode 120 to Set Right What Once Went Wrong and succeeds, so once again the events of it never occur.
  • Episode 308, The Disappearance, has the League of Extraordinary Villains accidentally erase ALL 55+ characters (including themselves), thus paving the way for a third cast of characters, if only for one episode.
  • Special Episode 221, Reboot, for the 4th time resets the whole story back to the infamous episode 120. Of course, it doesn't last.
  • Episode 329, Popularity Contest, once again has the S.G.T. become more successful than the D.L.D., thus starting a 3-month arc in which the D.L.D. try to find their way back to the top.
  • Episode 347, The Finding has yet again reverse everything back to episode 120, except this time, not only are all the characters aware that time has been reversed, but so is the entire world. This also has Luke's dead crush Prescott not die and nobody ends up in the Demented Dimension!
  • Special Episode 274, Status Quo; Prescott dies and the the D.L.D. reclaim their throne as the top group that fights supernatural forces.

The titular trio; D.D., Luke and Dexter. When they're not arguing, fighting or insulting each other, they are solving supernatural mysteries. And even then they don't get along very well, but somehow manage to save the day.


League of Extraordinary Villains
A group consisting of four of D.L.D.'s former enemies; two mad scientists and two ghosts. The only thing they have in common is the mutual hatred of D.L.D. for one reason or another. In fact, their relationship is worse than the D.L.D.'s!

The original group was made of:

  • Dr. Lucifer Apartheid - A 1000 year old Mad Scientist.
  • The Lady in Grey - Real name Mirela Bundadolo. The ghost of a Black Widow.
  • The Lady in Lightgreen - Real name Annabelle Perkins. The ghost of The Lady in Grey's servant girl and lover.
  • Dr. Kvas Kvasimodo - Another, hunchbacked Mad Scientist.

Then, the two Ladies ascended to Dexter's Artificial Afterlife, leaving two spots open for new members (at least until Lucifer and Kvas cloned them with all their memories intact). They were:

The D.L.D.'s rivals; Sally Winthrope, Gina Dazzywazzy and Tina Monotonous. It was eventually revealed Sally thought of forming a three-man group that would fight monsters and stuff like that, and that D.D. stole the idea from her (which is how their rivalry started).

  • D.L.D.'s parents - D.D., Luke and Dexter's mom and dad, both Expies from Dexter's Laboratory.

  • Veronika Oštrić - The Hot Witch.

  • The staff of D.L.D.'s school - Consists of principal Pearl Peterson, homeroom teacher Ms. Elaine Peanutbrain and school counselor Zhanna Dickle. The former two are only in it for the paycheck, much to the displeasure of the latter.

  • Sylvia Croissant - An Emotionless Girl with a Gag Nose.

  • Mee-mee and Lee-lee - Another pair from the original series.

  • School of Hugwartz - In the episode Anti-Hogwarts, the D.L.D. visit a really crappy wizard school run by principal Al Dummydoor, and made friends with its two most mischievous students; Zarry Mopper and Meina Kinezović.

  • Satan - Yep, Big Red himself.

  • Death - The Grim Reaper herself. Since anytime somebody dies in this series they come back later (one way or another), her job is kinda pointless.

  • Metropolis Newz - The local TV news station. Hosted by David Fernsberry and reported by Charmaine Ladis, it appears whenever something related to D.L.D. happens.

  • Walter van Heavenwing - A monster hunter who would often collaborate with the D.L.D.

  • Lucy - Luke's Distaff Counterpart from the Opposite Gender Universe.

  • The Author - The omnipresent creator of the comic. Anytime something illogical and/or unoriginal happens, the characters berate him; he usually responds by drawing a mustache on them.

Characters who are neither secondary or tertiary, but whose only purpose is to fill the background.

  • The 13 ghosts - A group of identical generic looking ghosts who even in their debut episode didn't pose any real threat. Since then they have appeared 3-4 times as a background gag.

  • Ricky Smithins - A blonde kid from D.L.D.'s school frequently seen in the background, or used as some one-note gag.

  • Goth Girl and her friend - The former, a girl clad completely in black; the latter, her bespectacled redhaired friend. Usually found in D.L.D.'s school among other students.

  • Katherine - A shorthaired girl also frequently found in D.L.D.'s school.

  • Kristy - A girl first seen the last time D.L.D. were in high school, later in the background.

  • Kool-Aid Man - Yup, the one. Used only as a background gag.

Characters - new cast

When compared to the old cast, these new ones are fairly Lighter and Softer; they don't argue or snark at each other, and even the main villain seems kind of sympathetic (until another villain shows up).

As of episode 165 they are put together with the old cast, for better or worse. As of episode 192, they are in the Demented Dimension where they're helping the Syrian refugees who have a started a new life there (since, sadly, they really had no other place to go).As of episode 244 they are back in our world.

New D.L.D.

10 of New D.L.D.'s friends, a Big Bad Ensemble and a reporter.

  • Martina Latina - The Spicy Latina.

  • Jasmine - The Robot Girl.

  • Zhao-Len Chang - Former member of Z.C.Z., the Chinese D.L.D.-type group (did I mention every country in the world has a D.L.D.-type group? It does), now living in the West.

  • Linda Stefani - The Ditz.

  • Lona Lynn - A majorette.

  • Bludweiser - A broody, sulky goth guy.

  • Darla - The Plucky Genki Fat Girl.

  • Vicky Oštrić - Veronika's little sister, a Cute Witch.

  • Yoko Subarashii - A Cosplay Otaku Girl.

  • Klara - She's not so much as a Perky Goth, but a Genki Goth.

  • Debra Deborah - The new anchorwoman and reporter for Metropolis Newz, a Sassy Black Woman.

The New League of Extraordinary Villains
A Big Bad duo that's set out to destroy the D.L.D.; first the newbies, and now the originals.As of episode 287, the group is completely disbanded.They were:

  • Dr. Marvin Zero - A Mad Scientist.

  • Damjanka Jadranov - A girl who can't stand society and is simply evil. From head to toe she's dressed in black (her shirt, hoodie jacket, pants, boots, hair, make-up, spiked collar... all black).

  • Hunter and Day Terry - Thompson's teenage kids from 26 years in the future, the year 2040, appeared in episode 163 The Terries.

  • Maiya - In episode 186, Boy Meets Ghoul, New D.L.D. investigates a building that's haunted by a ghost of a woman who hides her face. In the end, however, it turns out this woman is not only a living person named Maiya (she hides her face because, as she puts it, it brought her nothing but trouble), but also the mother of Hunter and Day.

  • Marcy - Canon Immigrant from Little Witch Vicky; a Cute Witch with a magical talking diary.

Gina: Sally, why are we here?
Sally: Because this is a haunted house, and we're in a horror comic!

D.D. (possessed): Sally Winthrope, you must die!
Sally: But I have a manicure at 3'0 clock!

Dexter: Guys, you better buckle up, 'cuz it's rock'n'roll time!
D.D.: Oh, that's promising.

Po: Time for mindless violence!

Dexter: So now what?
D.D.: We have to go back! I just hope things haven't gotten worse!
[cut to Metropolis Newz]
David: This is David Fernsberry and things have gotten worse!

D.D.: So, Rex, we can solve this in two ways... nonsensical cartoon violence or calm peaceful negotiation. And we all know how we work things out around here, don't we?
Rex: Already ahead of you! [suddenly dressed as Lord Voldemort ] Prepare to die!

Dr. Apartheid: What?! No way! If me and my group are gonna be accepted into your union, then it's gonna be beacuse of our strengths and skills, not because we saved your asses! So forget it!
(beat - the rest of the League glare at him)
Leader of the United Villains: Lucifer, you're a fucking moron. An honorable fucking moron, but a fucking moron nonetheless.

Dexter: So, how's principal Dummydoor?
Meina: Still boring and old as always!
D.D.: Yeah, I always thought that as a recurring character he's pretty useless!
Dummydoor: Hello, I'm right here! And why do I have to sit on this stupid tripod?!
D.D.: 'Cause you're old and useless! Now shut up!

Tina: [to Luke] And I know how you and I will fight, my darling chocolate cake! First we'll strip naked, then you'll rub lubricant into my ass, then I'll take a cucumber, and then...
[Luke punches her]
Tina: O.K., fine, I'll take a carrot!

Luke: Quick, let's kill it!
D.D.: We can't! Even though it's a horrible little demon, it's still Gina's baby, and I'm sure that as a mother, she wouldn't want-

[to the tune of This is Halloween from The Nightmare Before Christmas]
13 ghosts:
Boys and girls of every age
Wouldn't you like to see something deranged?
Come with us and you will see
This, our show called "D.L.D."
This is D.L.D
This is D.L.D.
They are full of depravity
This is D.L.D.
This is D.L.D.
They like to swear and scream
Try not to wet your panties
It's their show
Everybody scream
At the sight of D.L.D.
I am the one with the pretty blonde hair
Pretty in pink, that's what I wear
I am the one who's always on crack
Drinking booze and gallons of Jack
This is D.L.D.
This is D.L.D.
But who could forget about me?
In this town we call home
Everyone likes our parody songs
Principal Peterson:
In this show
Our standards are very low
Everyone's waiting for the next episode
Round that corner, man
Hiding in the trash can
It's our rivals who wanna say
This is D.L.D.
Refuge in
Aren't you scared?
Lisa and Ammy:
Well, that's just fine
Watch it once, watch it twice
And we will hear your cries
Stare in awe at our blight
Dr. Apartheid:
Everybody scream
Everybody scream
Rest of the League:
In this show with no pity
I am a witch without a goal
Just a space filler, that's my role
I am the one from the ghetto, yo
We're the onry non-whites in this show
I am Satan, the one from Hell
Actually harmless, as you can tell
This is D.L.D.
This is D.L.D.
D.L.D., D.L.D., D.L.D, D.L.D.
Mom and Dad:
We're the parents without a clue
Of what horrors our kids are due
David Fernsberry:
And our job
Charmaine Ladis:
Is reporting
David and Charmaine:
About the actions of D.L.D.
In this show
Counselor Dickle:
Our standards are very low
Everyone's waiting for the next episode
Guess who's back
The gang on crack
And they're gonna do some stupid stunt
Scare! This is D.L.D.
Everybody scream
One day we will make them die
Oh this gang is so overrated
They can't even do their job right
This is D.L.D.
This is D.L.D
D.L.D. D.L.D. D.L.D D.L.D.
Zarry and Meina:
In your town you call home
You know you like our parody songs
La la la la D.L.D.
La la la la la la, bla bla bla, yecch!

[to the tune of Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In from Hair]
In the Season 11 finale
The whole cast kicked the bucket
Then we came in to replace them
If you don't like it...
New D.L.D.:
Well, you can suck it!
This is the dawning of the age of new characters
Age of new characters
Age of new characters
New characters
New characters

Harmony and understanding
That is what we require
We won't be too demanding
Don't throw us into the fire
New characters
New characters
It's our first time so be gentle
Don't judge us by how we act
If you think the Author's gone mental
New D.L.D.:
You're right, so give him flak!
This is the dawning of the age of new characters
Age of new characters
Age of new characters
New characters
New characters

Let the fun times
Let the fun times begin
The fun times begin...

Mrs. Rogač: Our house is...alive?! That is stupid and doesn't make any sense!
Luke: Don't worry, it's not the weirdest thing that ever happened in this comic!
Mrs. Rogač: What comic?!
Luke: THIS comic! We live in a comic book, y'know!
Mrs. Rogač: What are you talking about, this is no comic book, this is real life!
D.D.: I don't like her! She's not in touch with reality!

D.D.: Stop terrorizing this family, and give in, Evil Doll!
Possessed doll (demon voice): FUCK THE POLICE!

Persephone: The Author has another case of writer's block.
Gina: Another? And when did one of them end?

Thompson: You probably still live with your parents and fight monsters, all the same, every day! You will never move forward, and you will never experience the kind of love me and my friends had!
D.D.: O.K., you know what? Fuck you, Thompson. You're acting like you're better than us, while you spent how many years doing our job? Three! You have far less experience than us, and yet you're still being cocky!
And just so you'd know, even if I become a move/music star, I'd still hunt monsters because no matter how much I complain about it, it's still something I'm the best at, and I wouldn't do anything else!
By the way, do you even know why the Author got rid of you all? Because you're BORING. Almost all of you were the same age and the same personalities, and there was no conflict to make you look interesting, unlike us, who vary more when it comes to age and personality! I mean, you and your friends were so homogenous you may as well have had your own show on the CW!

David Fernsberry: And in other news, this morning a bakery was robbed! But it was not money that was taken, but food! Luckily, the police managed to catch the culprit. Here's what she had to say...

Vicky: What are you doing in Metropolis?
Morticia Addams: Well, back in our old town, we were considered freaky and weird. Metropolis, however, has a lot of weird stuff going on, so we fit right in!

Luke: What was that thing?
Dexter: I have a word for it, but you're not gonna like it.
Luke: Try me.
Dexter: That was a psychic space mutant!
Dexter: That creature feeds on our memories and uses them to scare us and eventually eat us!
Luke: Well, if we're making fun of something, I don't know what's worse; the original or the parody!

Luke: I am beat! How long have we been walking for?
Ammy: 15 minutes.
Luke: Oh.

[Group chat]
Tina: Hey yall! What's up???
D.D.: Not much. We're waiting to see if we're gonna have new episodes.
Vicky: I was gonna have my own spinoff, but nothing happened.
Luke: Yeah, we know.
Vicky: I'm still bitter about that.

Almond: For my book report I read Tom Sawyer. It's about a boy named Tom Sawyer. He's a ninja that fights against Lord Voldemort, but together they win The Hunger Games against Narnia!

Tina: [sees Lucy] Gasp! Oh, no! My two passions; McDonald's and Luke Botey! Or, to be precise, the female version of him from an alternate universe!

Dr. Kvasimodo: So, where did they [D.L.D.] end up?
Dr. Apartheid: In the Demented Dimension! Wait, are we supposed to know about that place?
Lady in Grey: Don't ask me! I'm still trying to figure out if this is the version of reality in which we're still together!

Tina: I bought 60 cans of fruit, 35 loaves of bread, 43 chocolates, 32 boxes of cookies and a pack of diet Coke.
Charmaine Ladis: So you're ready for the Coronavirus?
Tina: The what now?

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