This page is about the fictionalized personas of Jordan Klepper and his Citizen Journalists. Their bios are taken directly from their Comedy Central page.
- Conspiracy Theorist: Jordan Klepper and his "citizen journalists" all espouse conspiracy theories.
- Insistent Terminology: Klepper always refers to his correspondents as "citizen journalists."
- Insane Troll Logic: All of them have this.
Jordan Klepper is an American, a freethinker and a human, in that order. Klepper, an outsider, spent three years as a mole within the mainstream media, first with leftist puppet Jon Stewart, then with millennial leftist puppet Trevor Noah. While undercover, Jordan founded The Oppo Radio Network, where he regularly exposed Establishment lies on his flagship six-hour show, “Mouth Justice.” Jordan’s hobbies include red-pilling the masses and defending America, a country that he barely even recognizes nowadays.
- Expy: To Stephen Colbert’s character from The Colbert Report, right down to the daddy issues.
- Insane Troll Logic: In a segment in which Klepper looked at "good" and "bad" numbers, he engaged in some mental gymnastics to make the $400,000 Secretary of Health Tom Price spent on private flights a "good" number. Even Klepper himself seemed to find it quite straining.Jordan Klepper: $400,000. Four. Four is the number of legs of a horse. And horses were popular in the 1830s, 1830 is military time for 6:30. And 6:30 is when the sun goes down. And son is also a male child, which is who Tom Price was visiting. And "visiting" has eight letters. And a son is half a father. Eight divided in half is four. And what has four letters? "Good."
- Know-Nothing Know-It-All: When Klepper isn't misinterpreting the news, he's getting his facts wrong, but so what? The important thing is that he messes up with great sincerity and conviction.
- Lack of Empathy: He claims that empathy is "a weakness" and Donald Trump is engaged in a "national empathy rollback".Jordan Klepper: Empathy is a waste of time. That's why it's one of the Seven Deadly Sins.
- The Mole: He explains his appearances on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and The Daily Show with Trevor Noah as him being a mole sent to infiltrate it. He didn't seem to be very good at it.Trevor Noah: What are you doing?
Jordan Klepper: I'm a mole. I mean, nothing.
[Zooms in on Trevor Noah, text appears saying "CLUELESS STOOGE"] - Never My Fault: Klepper will always insist that it’s always somebody else’s fault.
- "Well Done, Son" Guy: Klepper has thinly veiled daddy issues. For example, when a line in "O Canada" was made gender-neutral, with the phrase "all thy sons" changed to "all of us", his reaction was:Jordan Klepper: Refusing to praise sons? Since when did the Canadian national anthem become my dad?
Tim Baltz was born in the red-blooded, working-class steel mill fires of Joliet, Illinois. He's a veteran of 11 rage suppression seminars, three different Wall Street jobs and one college degree (double major in physical education and finance). Baltz currently hosts the number one, number three and number 11 shows on The Oppo Radio Network: Go to Bed Angry, Driving with Anger and The Alpha Free-Thinking Conspiracy Hour. In his free time, he enjoys exposing globalist indoctrination, not apologizing for how masculine he is and laughing with friends.
- Hair-Trigger Temper: As lampshaded in his bio, part of his shtick is that he always seems a moment away from yelling at someone or throwing a punch.
Laura Grey is a professional pundit, social commentator, political commentator, writer, radio personality, toe model, macrame genius and skilled riflewoman. While in law school, she was impregnated with the ideas of Ayn Rand and became a born-again conservative, prompting her to drop out and become a successful mommy blogger before she even had kids. Soon afterward, she was tapped to host her own show on The Oppo Radio Network, where she regularly advocates for guns, shares her favorite meatloaf recipes and exposes the lies of the feminist Vagenda (TM). Her movie credits include Steve Bannon's The Undefeated and White Chicks (as a featured extra). She'd like to thank her husband, Cole, for being, well, Cole.
- Female Misogynist: Type 2 as she goes on and on about how feminism is supposedly ruining America. Even becoming a mommy blogger despite not having children, and being an all-around hypocrite.
Niccole Thurman joined The Opposition years ago, when, as a communications/fashion major at ASU, she realized that the individualized, conservative way of making things happen suited her personality much better than the "everyone is equal" mentality of liberal America. Some people are just better than others, and usually it's because they have money. Plus, being black and conservative is way more rare, so it helped her get attention, which is very important. She considers herself a cultural savant, as well as an expert at scamming people to get what you want — be it drinks, entry to parties or policy change. You may recognize her from her viral expose on political hookups, "Hate-Banging Your Enemies," which she produced herself. It has garnered over 8,025 hits on YouTube!
- Attention Whore: It's clear that Niccole really doesn't care about politics, she's just doing this to gain fame. Towards the end of the series she becomes clearly inclined into becoming a social media personality.
- Only in It for the Money: Unlike the others, Niccole really doesn't care about politics, she's just doing this to gain fame.
Kobi Libii is a self-recognized expert in an astonishing array of fields ranging from mathematics to psychology to pointing out Italy on a map. He has lectured at a number of soon-to-be-accredited universities and has been awarded multiple prizes as a result of his research into how to be awarded prizes. His books include Credibility for Non-Experts, Books and How to Skim Them and the Newark Times best-selling So, You've Padded Your Resume, for which he won the Nobel Peace Prize. Kobi is the host of The Oppo Radio Network's Kobi Libii Teaches At You.
- Know-Nothing Know-It-All: He's a Con Man who pretends to be smarter than he actually is.
Aaron Jackson/Josh Sharpnote is a patriot, a proud defender of free speech and a gay conservative. Deal with it!!! A graduate of Pecan Creek State College, he is a classically trained theatre minor. He's the co-host of the radio show RAW TALK: An Unprotected Chat with Josh & Aaron. He's a singular voice in the new media landscape, and you'll never find anyone like him.
- Attention Whore: Even moreso then Nicole. In their last "Going at the Movies" segment, they openly admitted that they don't believe anything they say and just want people to listen to them.
- Camp Gay: Both of them.
- The Dividual: They're always seen together, and their personalities are very similar.
- Gay Conservative: Their whole schtick, and definitely the Boomerang Bigot variety as they actively oppose LGBT rights.
- Expy: To Jim, the unseen man Stephen Colbert always directed on The Colbert Report (and on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, since Stephen brought Jim along to work with him there).
- The Ghost: He is always offscreen.
