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The protagonist of the series. Sandra is a typical middle school girl with a pet talking raccoon. She does have a bit of an egotistical side; she likes dressing up as "The Empress of Northia" and addressing her stuffed animal "subjects".
- Affectionate Nickname: Sandy.
- Barrier Maiden: Is revealed to be the only thing standing between Cloud being the Nice Guy he is and him turning into a vicious crime lord.
- Bad Liar: Averted. She's a surprisingly good one. She also can do it with minimal preparation.
- Betty and Veronica: For Cloud, the Betty to Larisa's Veronica. Cloud chooses Sandra.
- Berserk Button: Coming off as a threat to Sandra's relationship with Cloud is unwise.
- Beware the Nice Ones: When the "hand of god" replaces Woo with Tom the talking toast, Sandra first eats the toast. Then she makes the hand an offer it cannot refuse.
- A Boy and His X: A girl and her raccoon.
- Character Blog: Sandra has a YouTube channel, also going by her alter ego Sandy the Third, empress and supreme ruler of Northia, there. It has not even been logged on since 2010, though.
- Clingy Jealous Girl: A mild example, but Larisa really shouldn't flirt with Cloud while she's around.
- Covert Pervert: Yes, Cloud, girls have naughty thoughts too.
- She also finds Cloud sexy when he is forced to crossdress.
- Granola Girl: Mild example, she considers herself a conservationist.
- Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold
- Missing Mom
- Outdoorsy Gal: Not so much after she started to hit puberty.
- Spammer: Spams Cloud's mail account for scaring Woo into losing control of his bladder while sitting on her lap.
- Tomboyish Ponytail
- You Are Worth Hell: Not said out loud, but Larisa is willing to make a Deal with the Devil to save her.
Sandra's pet raccoon. Sandra rescued him from an abusive owner, and he's lived with her since. He seems to divide his time between living with Sandra and exploring the woods with his animal friends.
- Carnivore Confusion: Both averted and played straight. Woo is friendly with Shadow, a fox, and Sid, a squirrel. They regularly try to eat each other, but as the tagline says, fail. This doesn't stop Woo and Shadow from eating other woodland creatures, successfully.
- Civilized Animal: While Woo likes living with the Norths, he still goes back to the woods, where his partner Lily lives. Like other raccoons, he likes to eat a lot of food, including leftovers and other human foods!
- Deadpan Snarker
- Happily Married: Well, not exactly "married", but he's certainly found a perfect mate in Lily.
- Intellectual Animal: Woo is no slouch intellectually. He can speak to humans and attempted subliminal cookie acquisition. His spelling skills do need some work, though this may be a Shout-Out to Hobbes, who has a similar problem.
- Motivational Lie: As he learned from Sandra, "The outcome justifies even the biggest lie".
- Pals With Seeoahtlahmakaskay
- Rascally Raccoon: To quote writer Oliver Knorzler's own description: "He will break your heart with a smile and then, while you are looking away for a second, raid your fridge." A classic example of Woo's modus operandi can be seen here.
- Superpowered Alter Ego: Apparently, Woo has a dangerous "expert mode".
- Talking Animal: Specifically, a Civilized Animal. Though all the animals talk to each other, Woo is the only one specifically shown as talking to humans. Sandra freaks out when she first discovers he can talk!
- This Is My Human: And he'll find her.
Sandra's best friend and later boyfriend. Though he seems non-threatening and sweet-tempered, he's actually much stronger than his outward appearance would have you believe.
- Adorkable: Big time. He can still kick your ass if you make him mad.
- Anime Hair: Cloud has an Idiot Hair and this...
- Badass Adorable: He's one of the cutest boys, yet he can use a plastic knife as a weapon.
- Betty and Veronica: Sandra and Larisa, respectively, with Cloud as Archie. He chooses Sandra.
- Beware the Nice Ones: He's a really good guy, but if you get on his bad side, he can give you the walloping of a lifetime.
- Was recently revealed to have the potential to become a brutal crime lord if he loses Sandra.
- Bully Hunter: After this moment, the only problem at school is Larisa.
- Bullying a Dragon: Ralph the bully makes this mistake with Cloud. In fairness, Cloud doesn't look particularly threatening.
- Chick Magnet: He's a 10 in the girls' ranking.
- Crush Blush: Not as much as Landon, but still.
- Cute Bruiser: Can you believe this adorable young teen can beat men twice his size?
- Future Badass: Strips that feature hypotethical futures mostly depict Cloud following in the steps of his mom. "The Divine Comedy" reveals he has all the latent potential to be a vicious crime lord if he ever loses Sandra.
- Implausible Fencing Powers: See Bullying a Dragon above, he can slash you with a PLASTIC KNIFE.
- Look at his mom and say his skills don't make sense.
- He also takes on a bunch of Heartless armed only with a wooden sword.
- Look at his mom and say his skills don't make sense.
- Master Swordsman: He's able to keep up with Sir Elgamore!
- Non-Standard Character Design: Drawn in a more animesque style than the other characters.
- Rebel Leader: He wishes to be the leader of the Burmese rebellion when he grows older, as most of his relatives from his mother's side have suffered a lot in the war.
- Red Is Heroic: The red-haired protector of his school's weaker students.
One of Sandra's best friends, Larisa has a strong mischievous streak. She likes to tease Sandra, flirt with Cloud, and generally cause trouble. However, there are hints of a darker side to her personality.
- Affectionate Nickname: Sandra calls her Liz.
- Betty and Veronica: The Veronica to Sandra's Betty.
- Be Yourself: Hilariously subverted. Sandra, being Liz's friend, gives her the wise advice of not being herself when in front of Landon's mom.
- Bi the Way: Tells everyone in her class, in the form of a report, that the reason she doesn't kiss girls is because of the unavailability of willing partners.
- When she finds out Zoey likes girls, Larisa isn't shocked until Zoey says she has no interest in guys.
- She also asks a girl from her annual fire workshop if she's single, after she lit a fire faster than her.
- Braids of Action: A single, characteristic braid.
- The Bully: To Zoey. Her appearances usually involve having Larisa doing something nasty to her. To put this into perspective, we haven't seen Zoey do anything to her at all, and she's often depicted as a Jerk Ass.
- Larisa herself denies the accusation, see Disproportionate Retribution.
- The Corrupter: Since her Deal with the Devil (see below), she almost always try and have her friends take the sexier option about whatever they're doing.
- Cute and Psycho: A very pretty, even hot, girl that just happens to find causing random mayhem fun and is estatic about the idea of becoming a succubus for the Devil to the point of openly drooling.
- Cute but Troubled
- The Dreaded: "The Divine Comedy" reveals that pretty much the entire city knows about Larisa's love for fires; an entire mall full of people fled after seeing her close to a little flaming paper.
- Deal with the Devil: In order to save Sandra's life from one of the human god's pranks, she signed a contract with the devil that would condemn her soul to hell upon death (the contract would be rendered void if they failed to save her). Although, it was more like a job offering than an eternity of torment (the devil wanted to put her talents to use as a succubus).
- Disproportionate Retribution: Debatable. She force-fed Zoey her French homework in retaliation for calling Sandra names behind her back. They both agree that maybe they should both back off a bit.
- Everyone Loves Blondes: She's considered for the boys a 10 in attractiveness, and could remain as 10 if it wasn't for her craziness giving her a -1. She's even recognized as the prettiest girl in her school in the 721 strip.
- Fille Fatale: Larisa likes to dress sexy to appeal to boys, has already smooched with around a dozen of them, and doesn't mind being called a bad example for this sort of behavior... She's also digging more conservative family values, though.
- She was a bit annoyed about being called a slut. Sorta.
- Flirty girl. Leading to this gem by a commenter.The New Larisa 500:
0 to Flirtatious in two seconds flat!
- First-Name Basis: She calls her parents by their names, showing how little she considers them an authority over her.
- Flight: She can defy gravity for the hell of it without explanation how.
- Funetik Aksent: Averted. Larisa speaks with a Russian accent, but you wouldn't know this unless you read Novil's posts or played the game.
- Give Geeks a Chance: Larisa starts going out with Landon after he helps her get a B- on a math quiz.
- Good Bad Girl: Saying that she's a wild girl is a bit of an understatement; Larisa has smooched half the boy's populace in school, flirts with men older than her, and her own mother has given up trying to control her and is only concerned about her daughter's virginity being intact. But whenever needed, her heart is always in the right place, and she is currently in a healthy and stable relationship with Landon and has reconciled with her enemy.
- Heteronormative Crusader: Zigzagged; she tells to Zoey that she's completely OK with lesbians (of course, in the pragmatic way of "less competition for hot guys"). Gay guys, on the other hand, are fair game (because it means she can't have them and they add to the competition).
- Hidden Buxom: Judging by this panel, she has quite the knockers for her young age.
- Hidden Depths: Larisa asks deep questions, though she hardly seems stupid.
- Ill Girl: Larisa is diabetic, suffers from allergies, and has some other medical condition she hasn't told her friends about, which may explain her Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour.
- And now her condition has been precisely diagnosed as Wolfram Syndrome, which will blind her within ten years and kill her in twenty.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Larisa may be kinda of a jerk, but she cares for those she loves. Additionally, despite not liking Zoey, she worries for her when she sees her crying. As well as being quite outraged that Zoey thinks Larisa bullies her.
- She recently was willing to sell her soul to the Devil for the sake of saving Sandra and preventing Cloud from making a Face–Heel Turn.
- Just Friends: Type IV gets; gets averted outright, right after other characters discuss almost verbatim the trope's older older name (Friend Zone).
- Like You Were Dying: Larisa's antics get more disturbing as the reader gets more hints about her condition.
- Mad Artist: She paints as a hobby, and her pyromania alone definitely qualifies her as "mad."
- Manic Pixie Dream Girl: To Landon. He was rather invisible and stuck in the mud until they started dating and she does shake his world.
- Mistaken for Junkie: Larisa, who is diabetic, is caught by a teacher when giving herself an insulin shot during recess. She's then sent to the principal who informs her that taking this "dangerous drug" violates the school's zero tolerance policy against drugs. The plot was inspired by a similar incident on a U.S. middle school in the 1990s. Start reading here.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero!: Granted, Landon's mother overreacts to everything, but Larisa slipping into her Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour definitely put her on Landon's mother's bad side.
- Overly Long Tongue: In #982, she enlarges her tongue to about two or three of it's normal size to lick Sandra's ice.
- Pyromaniac: She really likes to set things on fire. She even has an annual seminar with her friends to instruct them on fire related activities and when trying to act as her own opposite, she proclaims a love for ice.
- Rubber Girl: Extends her mouth, so that her lips reach Landon's house and she can kiss him despite being grounded.
- Seen It All: She cannot be surprised by anything.
- Sensual Slavs: She's considered very attractive by her schoolmates, has no qualms (and in fact prefers) to use sex appeal to get what she wants, and speaks with a noticeable Russian accent.
- Shameless Fanservice Girl: She has no problem with the fact that she accidentally sent a nude pic to over 60 million people. There is a reason for this.Larisa: I’ll be blind in ten years and dead in twenty. I don’t give a damn if some puritans have a problem with my naked body.
- Single Woman Seeks Good Man: Her crush on Cloud and her relationship with Landon. Notice that her affections for the latter come about because he was the only one kind enough to actually help her (as opposed to every other boy — except Cloud — who just lusts after her but is unwilling to help her), rather than simply because he helped her got a good grade — i.e. he treated her like an actual PERSON rather than just a hot babe.
- Snake People: In #762, she is able to unhinge her lower jaw (referring to an erroneous belief about snakes being able to unhinge their jaws to swallow animals whole) to open her mouth superhumanly wide to eat a really big burito in one bite and reveals fangs and tongue like a snake. She claims to be a descendant not of Adam and Eve, but of the biblical Serpent.
- Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour:
- Larisa carries a lighter just to set random fires, jokes about being a "junkie" when she injects insulin, accuses a teacher of molesting her to get out of a homework assignment (and has to be warned against molesting her guide on the camping trip), and flirts with the boys at an... adult level. Apparently, all the girls have been warned about her. Suggestions that she's got bigger problems than diabetes put this in a more disturbing light.
- "You're still a virgin, right?" And remember. This is her mother.
- True Art Is Incomprehensible : She spouts explanations of a painting in the museum -- all contradictory.
- Alternatively, a subversion: Her "Larisa Presents" strips seem to suggest she's making fun of modern artists and their attempts at being "clever" and "inventive," and seems to take great pleasure in seeing art patrons buy into the BS she makes up on the fly about paintings — however, she loves Van Gogh's Starry Night for its simple beauty.
Richard NorthA single father raising Sandra since his wife died two years prior to the series.
- Beware the Nice Ones: Normally a very kind father, but after hearing Woo's previous owner abuse him, he locks him in the raccoon cage.
- One of the Kids: A huge video game addict.
David and Ye Thuza WilliamsCloud's father and mother, respectively. Both are huge nerds, even going so far as naming their children after Final Fantasy characters. Ye Thuza is a Burmese immigrant who used to be a rebel back in her home country.
- Adorkable: Fork shield!
- Action Mom: Cloud's mom Ye Thuza is not only a loving mother and housewife, but also an urban ninja who single-handedly nails a tonberry (a dangerous monster in the Final Fantasy series) to a concrete wall with a wooden staff. Not to mention she's also a former Child Soldier. Possibly a Deconstruction of the tropes. While certainly not a bad mom, her rebel experiences have left her "still somewhat messed up".
- Amazingly Embarrassing Parents: The best kind. Also see Shipper on Deck.
- Child Soldier: Cloud's mom was a Burmese guerrilla fighter in her teens, making her literally a Former Teen Rebel.
- Happily Married
- Manchild: In one strip, David was horrified that he was getting old (he liked vegetables better than the dessert!). Ye Thuza calms him down saying he was still too immature to be considered an adult yet. He's relieved.
- Open-Minded Parent: Cloud's mother seems to have no problem with having her son explore abandoned factories for treasure, unless he forgets to pack the rope. Of course, these are the same parents that sign him up for sword training.
- Retired Badass: Ye Thuza.
- Shipper on Deck: Cloud's mother and sister, much to Cloud's annoyance. (And yes, that is him hanging a lampshade on it.)
- Team Normal: David is the only normal member of this Badass Family.
Yuna WilliamsCloud's younger sister. An adorable, smart, but annoying kid.
- Annoying Younger Sibling: To Cloud, teasing him about his relationship with Sandra (like the rest of his family), taking his things without warning, etc.
- Child Prodigy: Yuna is capable of making a home-made nuclear reactor and understands interuniversal Teichmüller theory. She's also a little math genius, and her parents tried to get her a personal tutor.
- Ditzy Genius: While she loves her math, science, and physics theory and is very able to put them in practice, she's not very good with mental arithmetics, needing to write her numbers down (which is what cost her a tutor). She also lacks the common sense and tact to realize that her mother's teachings on "self-defense" are way too extreme for her age and peaceful society, and she didn't know that "motherfucker" is a highly crude word.
- Genius Bruiser: Able to hold her own in hand-to-hand combat and a little genius.
- Little Miss Badass: Just like her brother, her mother has been training her. Unlike Cloud, there's very few moments when Yuna is being badass.
- Strong Family Resemblance: She looks like a mini Ye Thuza, and sometimes behaves like her.
- Troubling Unchildlike Behavior:
- Yuna's way of playing with dolls is recreating a story where the Disney Princesses have had enough of Merida and plot her murder. And then finishing it with a song!
- She also scares the crap out of anyone that gets in her way, even her teachers, who are convinced that she will become a supervillain "able to put all James Bond's villains to shame".
- Wise Beyond Their Years: She tends to ask the most surprising questions. She's also incredibly smart for her age, to the point she feels that normal school holds her down.
- Wrong Genre Savvy: Uses guerrilla knowledge in a pacific Slice of Life.
Ivan and Jelena KorolevLarisa's painter father and his wife/manager Jelena.
- Ambiguously Bi: There's little doubt that Ivan and Jelena are attracted to women and men respectly, but Ivan admits to finding Nick from Zootopia hot and Jelena shares Larisa's feelings about Judy.
- Berserk Button: Ivan hates Thomas Kinkade.
- Facial Profiling: The parents of Larisa have pronounced cheekbones and jaw-lines to have them look more Slavic.
- Foreign Cuss Word: Ivan vents his anger about how Russian policy is depicted in US the trough somehow OK-ish Russian mat.
- Parents as People: Larisa's parents have long ago gave up trying to control their daughter, but they still care about her and work hard to provide her with any medical need. It's just difficult to raise a child with both diabetes, allergies, and a disease that will kill her in her 30's.
- Parental Neglect: Mild example; Larisa's behavior has driven Jelena to the point where she doesn't care as long as Larisa's still a virgin.
- Overprotective Dad: Ivan's first comments to Landon sound like this — then he subverts it by giving actual advice.Ivan: (To Landon) Better you as her boyfriend than some thug.
- Vodka Drunkenski: After cursing seemed to be insufficient, he changed into an Adidas training jacket and pants (most likely referencing the gopnik cliche) and sought relief in vodka and pickled cucumber (that's an actually correct depiction of what Russians eat together with vodka).
Landon HillLarisa's new boyfriend, whose advent does much to break up Larisa's flirting-with-Cloud habit.
- Adorkable: He's a nerdy, sweet guy who does everything he can to make his girlfriend happy.
- Crush Blush: Unsurprising, given Larisa's forthright manner.
- Dating What Mommy Hates: Landon's mother is very against his relation with Larisa, since Harriet is a very strict and religious person. After Larisa's visit, she's convinced the girl is actually a witch and just lets them date to keep Landon from becoming gay and as long as Larisa remains away from her. Ironically, Landon's dad seems OK with her.
- A Day in the Limelight: Landon gets an arc focused on issues related to his relationship with Larisa and his mother disapproving of it.
- Deadpan Snarker: He has his moments.Call me a naysayer, but I don't think it's possible to learn geometry through osmosis with a math book.
- Early-Bird Cameo: He has one where he gets saved from a bully by Cloud.
- Heroic B.S.O.D.: The guy literally has one when Larisa said that she would be ready in 10 seconds for them to take their relationship to the next level.
- Nerds Are Sexy: Larisa certainly thinks so.
- Nice Guy: See Adorkable
- Promoted to Love Interest: He was just a background character until he helped Larisa study for an important test when no one else did. Larisa started to date him afterwards.
- Promoted to Opening Credits: Still not as prominent as Sandra, Larisa, and Cloud, but is the most-shown child after those three.
- Satellite Love Interest: Rare Male Example. We still don't get a strip showing Landon without Larisa and/or in a situation that doesn't involve her.
- Savvy Guy, Energetic Girl: The savvy guy to Larisa's (over)energetic girl.
- Uptight Loves Wild: Kinda of an inversion as it was Larisa who started the relationship, but still applies.
Zoey IrwinOne of Sandra's classmates and Larisa's enemy. Best friends with Michelle, who she is later shown to be in love with.
- Alpha Bitch: She is stated as being one of the more popular girls in class as well as being shown insulting Sandra on a couple occasions.
- Butt-Monkey: Tends to be on the receiving end of Larisa's pranks. In more recent strips, however, it's her losing to Sandra that invokes this.
- Coming-Out Story: Her Day in the Limelight revolves around dealing with her unrequited crush, her heart getting broken, and her admitting she's a lesbian (and not bi).
- A Day in the Limelight: Zoey has her own arc now, where she deals with her lesbian issues, starting here.
- Deadpan Snarker: Even when depressed, she can still keep up the snark.
- Forceful Kiss: Gives one to Michelle, thinking that she would reciprocate her feelings. She didn't.
- Incompatible Orientation: Has a crush on Michelle, her best friend, who has a crush on Cloud.
- Unrequited Love: Finds out the hard way that Michelle has no interest in her and that she is disgusted by gay people.
- Inelegant Blubbering: In this strip. She tries to pass this off in the last panel as Beauty Is Never Tarnished, which only earns her a confused look from Michelle.
- Kick the Dog: Middle school girls: The only known species that always tortures its prey before devouring it.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Even Larisa can tell something's wrong here.
- Schoolgirl Lesbian: Much to Larisa's shock.
- Secret Keeper: She is the only one Larisa has told her secret medical condition to, in exchange for Zoey telling her about her sexuality.
- Sore Loser: She does not take losing to Sandra well.
- Those Two Girls: Up until she and Michelle got more focus, they were just background characters that always appeared together.
- Took a Level in Kindness: Admittedly, she considered Larisa a bully, so she never felt the need to show her or Sandra kindness, but after agreeing to a truce with Larisa, she has become a kinder person... to the audience.
- Tropaholics Anonymous: Got their help to become less of a bully.
MichelleOne of Sandra's classmates. She has a huge crush on Cloud, which generally shows itself as jealousy. Best friends with Zoey.
- Ascended Extra: Thanks to Zoey's A Day In The Lime Light as well as more focus overall, Michelle to has received more focus.
- Alpha Bitch: Like Zoey, she is a popular girl whose majority of appearances are of her insulting Sandra or Larisa.
- Closet Key: To Zoey.
- Green-Eyed Monster: She is incredibly jealous of Sandra's relationship with Cloud.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: While pretty much all of her appearances have been of her insulting Sandra or Larisa, she tries to help Larisa and Landon's relationship.
- Those Two Girls: It's not often that she won't be seen with Zoey at her side.
- Unrequited Love: To say she has no chance with Cloud is something of an understatement.
Luna HerreraOne of Sandra's classmates, who just came from Camden, New Jersey after some troubles with local folks.
- Beady-Eyed Loser: Her character design.
- Beware the Nice Ones: She can get really passionate about football. And best part? The referee actually did what she said.
- Book Dumb: She's not very good at factorizing. How bad she is? She gets to traumatize her former teacher and after some help and 20 terms, Sandra just got one nervous breakdown.
- The Caretaker: She looks after her dad now that he fell into a deep depression after a robbery and his wife's murder.
- Chekhov's Gun: In strip 663, Larisa gave a blue box containing what she later described as a Plot Device to be used as a Deus ex Machina at a later moment. It got used in strip 842.
- A Friend in Need: Her classmates donated their own old furniture for her empty apartment and collected enough money for her bills for a while. Larisa even sold her precious flamethrower. One of them agrees to give her leftovers of his family's butchery and another gave her dresses she made with her tailoress aunt. She's brought to tears at all the kindness.
- Polyamory: She's in a happy open relationship with three boys.
- Limited Wardrobe: She doesn't have that much clothes, and gets chewed out by Zoey as a result.
- Missing Mom: Her mom was killed by a crackhead.
- The Pollyanna: Despite coming from a city where murder is considered a cause of natural death, she thinks of the place as "not so bad" and has managed to stay strong in her situation.
- My God, You Are Serious: Larisa doesn't appreciate that Luna didn't take her seminar seriously.
- Shrinking Violet
- Tears of Joy: Our 666th strip is about a shy girl trying on dresses and crying tears of joy.
SidWoo's squirrel friend. Has to occasionally avoid being eaten by Shadow and Woo.
- The Chew Toy: Winter is not a very good season for him with tons of hungry predators around.
- Misplaced Wildlife: He is a Eurasian red squirrel living in North America, because his pregnant mother fell into a tourist's suitcase in France.
- Odd Friendship: Him and Shadow were practically raised together, as they were under the same animal saver's care.
- Ship Tease: With Ruth.
- Talking Animal
- Every Proper Lady Should Curtsy: Especially in front of a racoon celebrity.
- Mama Bear: HAH! Lily's overprotectiveness on her new born kits puts mama bears to shame. She shotgun threatens Woo to stay away from them and won't let him see the kits until they're three and a half years old (aka adults) and btw, Woo is the kits' father.
- Not Good With Humans: As she's scared of them hunting her or smacking her neck with one hand.
- Pals With Seeoahtlahmakaskay
- Relationship Upgrade: She and Woo were in a Friends with Benefits sorta of relationship; it was after Woo saved her life that she decided on both being a monogamous Official Couple.
- Satellite Love Interest: She's normally seen with Woo. Recent strips are subverting this as she's meeting more of Woo's friends, like Sid and Sandra, though with the latter she has some problems.
- Talking Animal
- Violently Protective Girlfriend: She give a nasty glare at Butterfly for daring to hint Woo is a liar.
ButterflyA raccoon celebrity, famous for being able to climb higher than any other raccoon.
- Crushing Handshake: Gives one to Woo, not out of aggression but because she Does Not Know Her Own Strength.
- Performance Anxiety: "21 hours, 17 minutes and 14 seconds before I fall to my death...
- You Need to Get Laid: The raccoon goddess suggests that she to look for a new goal after Butterfly climbed the most difficult mountain in the world, finishing her 'to do' list. She was meaning Butterfly founding a mate and having babies. Amusingly, Butterfly doesn't get it and starts planning more difficult and awesome challenges.
- Until The Stinger on the arc hinted that the goddess had arranged it anyway, but much more surreptitiously.
RuthA self-described "Level 5 predator", a squirrel that hunts predatory animals such as wolves and bears.
- Action Girl
- Ascended to Carnivorism
- Crazy Awesome: Again, hunts wolves.
- Death by Irony: Her victims are predators whose method of death was "killed and eaten by a squirrel".
- The Dreaded: For proof, just see this.
- The Hunter Becomes the Hunted: Her presence causes this.
- Orgasmically Delicious: In #770, she describes a steak she stole from Sandra's father's fridge and how she will eat it in very sexual terms.
- Ship Tease: Judging for this chapter, there's something going on between her and Sid.
- Shrouded in Myth: The eagle describes her with "razor-sharp claws and fiery eyes".
Sirius, Canopus, Arcturus, and VegaWoo and Lily's kits.
- Animal Stereotypes: Seeoahtlahmakaskay, Coyote, El-ahrairah, and Reynard are tricksters, and Isengrim and Roc are very mighty beasts. Meanwhile, Thomas is more on the order side of Order Versus Chaos.
- Blue and Orange Morality: They all favor their own subjects, which leads to conflict when one animal clearly intends to eat another.
- Carnivore Confusion: Ratatoskr seems a tad bit nervous about the presence of predators in the room.
- Jerkass Gods / The Gods Must Be Lazy: They all have signs of this. Except Roc.
SeeoahtlahmakaskayThe Raccoon God. She's rather close to Woo and Lily.
- Big Good
- The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You: If flashy-thinging becomes necessary, she can do it to the reader.
- Great Gazoo: Has certain hints of this.
- Rascally Raccoon: Especially if you ask Thomas.
- Stealth Mentor / Trickster Mentor
Thomas J. GodThe Human God.
- God: Has the appearance of Him, but is slightly different in purpose.
- God Is Dead: Killed by Odin at the end of the "Divine Comedy" story arc.
- Legacy Character: He's immediately replaced when a random human is offered to take over his job. It's implied Thomas wasn't the first one to hold the position.
- Grandpa God: He has the stereotypical "old-aged man" look, with his all-white hair and big beard and mustache.
- Jerkass God: To the point even the devil is disgusted.
- Made of Bologna: When Odin kills Thomas J. God, he is not shown to have any inner organs... And dissolves into nothing like a video game character.
- Villain with Good Publicity: Every single horrible thing he does gets blamed on the Devil thanks to the organized religions.
- The Cameo: Is here to remind us that Sandra and Woo and Gunnerkrigg Court actually take place in the same universe.
- Those Wily Coyotes
- The Atoner: After accidentally causing the Cretaceous-Palaeogene extinction event which killed off most of the dinosaurs, he spends most of his time answering the prayers of the last surviving ones, which are birds.
- The Gods Must Be Lazy: Averted. Compared to other gods, he's a workaholic. There's a very good reason for this.
- My Greatest Failure: See Phlebotinum Killed the Dinosaurs.
- Noble Bird of Prey
- Phlebotinum Killed the Dinosaurs: He did it, by accident.
The DevilThomas' main enemy.
- Affably Evil: Makes no mystery to be evil, but he's so damn nice about it you can't help but sympathize.
- The Corrupter: In a very nice way.
- Deal with the Devil: Of course. Given how he is, it's more a job offer than anything.
- Even Evil Has Standards: Even he is disgusted by Thomas' antics.
- Not Me This Time: A regular occurrence for him: he doesn't cause so much trouble for humanity, especially compared to Thomas, but he's always blamed because the one who does has a multi-billion dollar P.R. agency.
- Tom the Dark Lord: He's actually named Kevin.
OdinThe God of Valhalla.
- Big Damn Heroes: Saves the day in the "Divine Comedy" arc.
- Deus ex Machina: Literally: he's a god, and pops out of a small blue box up to kill Thomas right as he's about to pass judgement on (read: '''murder''!) Sandra.
- Frame-Up: Thomas once put on him the blame for manipulating the driver's logbook, hence his status when he appears in the series.
- Sealed Good in a Can: He's been imprisoned into a blue box for millennia.
- Disproportionate Retribution: Upper Management put him in the box for allegedly tampering with the driver's logbook.
- Walking Spoiler: Big time.
John J. GodThe new God of Humanity.
- Deity of Human Origin
- God Job: Seeoahtlahmakaskay offers him the job after Thomas is killed by Odin.
- Hope Spot: With him replacing Thomas, Seeoahtlahmakaskay believes that humanity's woes are finally (mostly) over, and starts saying it. Only for John to make clear that the power got to his head.
- We Hardly Knew Ye: The next time we see him after his debut, he ends up killed by Fortuna.
FortunaGoddess of fate. For the love of God, don't make her cry.
- Berserk Button: Messing with her fate alteration engine will get you eaten by the Cthulhu-like spider monster that comes out of her mouth. In a twist, she doesn't get mad when it's pressed, she just starts crying.
- Beware the Nice Ones: She seems like a sweet lady...until you make her cry, as John learned the hard way.
- The Dreaded: When Satan realizes that John made her cry, he starts panicking.
Dorothy CambridgeA "moral police" member who becomes the biology teacher in Sandra's school.
- Expy: To Dolores Umbridge, naturally.
- Does Not Like Men: Cloud describes her as a men-hater while talking with his mother.
- Henpecked Husband: Variation. Her husband is supportive to her hardcore feminism and he seems to have no problem with her being the one wearing the pants in the relationship. He even asks her if he can make her a sandwich.
- Killed Off for Real: May be the case, though she just disappeared with a "Puff". After getting on Ye Thuza's bad side.
- Straw Feminist: In her introduction, she takes over the former biology teacher (who's dragged off the classroom by two female masked thugs) for teaching that women are statistically less smart than men; she then proceeds to shut close all men's bathrooms while calling females the "better sex", give extra points to girls despite boys' answers being the very same, and forcing the boys to wear skirts as uniforms, all while preaching about gender equality with actions that clearly favor the girls. In her last appearance, she goes as far as to state that gender equality can only be achieved by castrating all men.
- It gets even worse in her introduction... the biology teacher said men have higher statistical variance... his next line was, presumably, going to point out there are more stupid men than there are stupid women.
- What Happened to the Mouse?: She just disappeared after going into a room. Puff. She has never been mentioned or acknowledged since then.
Melody CrawfordOne of Richard North's new coworkers, and head of the graphics programming department. She and him seem to disagree on just about everything, particularly when it comes to the esoterica of computer science.
- Anything but That!/ Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: In order to go after Richard, she changes the indent style on all of his code. He doesn't take it well.Jack: I can provide an alibi for you on Saturday from 4 P.M. to 6 P.M.Richard: [while sharpening an axe] I always knew I could count on you when it really mattered, Jack.
- Belligerent Sexual Tension: Seems to be going this way with Richard, although given how little attraction there is between the two, it may be plain old belligerence.
- It got bad enough that they were brought into mediation, and drove the mediator to drink.
- And then Richard invites her to dinner...
- Cloud Cuckoolander: She leaps on the table during the mediation session in order to throw further childish taunts to Richard.
- Cute and Psycho: She's a nice girl who likes to write code for open projects, cooks fancy three course meals, and sexually identifies herself as a praying mantis who devours her lovers' heads after intercourse while flashing a pair of gardening scissors. Then it's implied she might actually be a serial killer.Richard: (thinking while looking clearly disappointed) There's always something.
- Hollywood Nerd: Not as extreme as some examples, but she's definitely not bad-looking.
- Nerd: In her first introduction, she's wearing a t-shirt that references the P versus NP problem.
- She actually goes so far as to refer to Richard as a "filthy casual."
- Nerd Glasses: A part of her Hollywood Nerd getup.
- Rich Boredom: She won two million dollars from the lottery, but quickly grew bored and started to seek a job or getting hobbies for the sake of doing something.
- Volleying Insults: It's easier to count the things she does agree with Richard on.