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Main Characters
The King
King Harkinian, ruler of Hyrule.
- Abusive Parent: Takes on a fatherly role to Link, and often throws him out of the castle for saying his catchphrase. It's Played for Laughs, though.
- Adaptational Dumbass: From the original CD-i games, where he's portrayed as The Good King. Here, he's an idiot.
- Adipose Rex: Just like the original game, he's a king and he's fat.
- The Alcoholic: The first thing he says when on vacation is, "Who wants to watch me drink?" It's to the point where Zelda is concerned for his health.
- Big Eater: Of course! The man loves dinner.
- Big Fun: Always ready to have a good time and go on lighthearted capers.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Tries to sail to Tennessee to vote even though the election is over, fears going to Hell because he saw himself in Hell in a YouTube Poop, and goes nuts when his favorite cereal is taken off the market.
- Fat Bastard: He's a hedonistic fat man and on his worst days treats people like shipt.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With Gwonam; whenever he sees him he screams with joy.
- Impoverished Patrician: Downplayed; he's the King of a large realm with multiple city-states, seemingly in modern times, but lives life more like a middle-class American. One may think he's just saving money, but given his impulsive nature and constant complaints about his shit house, shit car, etc. That's a stretch to believe.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He's selfish and irritable, but he dotes on Zelda and deep down loves Link.
- Mad Libs Catchphrase: "My shit (car/house/job/boyfriend)".
- Nervous Wreck: "Developed an anxiety disorder" since Link moved in, has an existential crisis when he sees a YTP of himself going to Hell, frequently calls out "Wii wii! Emergency" when bothered, is horrified by Mario Head, and freaks out when his favorite cereal stops production. This might explain some of his more dickish moments.
- The Nicknamer: "My boy" for Link, "Gwo" or "Gwony" for Gwonam.
- Politically Incorrect Hero: Teaches Link the stereotype that Italians will do anything for gum.
- Speech Impediment: Sometimes pronounces his Rs as Ws. ("We want wadio")
- Straight Gay: Well, bisexual. He had a wife, bangs HOAHs, is dating Morshu, and according to Gwonam's scroll he's queer. He's not stereotypical at all.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: As much as he loves Gwonam, the two get on each other's nerves sometimes.
Link
- Affectionate Nickname: "My boy".
- Big Eater: Possibly moreso than Harky. He's constantly complaining about being hungry. This may be less about gluttony and more because he's a boy in his early teens working as a warrior, and really does require a lot of fuel.
- Butt-Monkey: Frequently dissed and slapped around by other characters.
- Catchphrase: "Gee, it sure is boring around here..." Much to the King's dismay.
- Creepy Child: Lampshaded by Gay Luigi in episode 12 when he goes into too much detail with a toilet metaphor; "He's one creepy kid!" Zelda agrees.
- A Day in the Limelight: Episode 12.
- Dogged Nice Guy: To Zelda, although there are hints she may feel the same way.
- Dumb Is Good: The dumbest character by far, and also the sweetest.
- The Gadfly: In the first few episodes, before his Too Dumb to Live characterization took over.
- Kiddie Kid: In his last year of middle school/first year of high sCOOL; but still plays with his toiis and in general talks like a young child. Lampshaded by Gwonam.
- Obfuscating Stupidity: Grabs his "stupid face" to annoy Gwonam.
- Race Lift: He reveals to the audience in one skit that he's Black.
- Secondary Character Title: The King is the star of most plots, despite Link's name being in the title.
- Too Dumb to Live: Thought spaghetti would cook faster in the toaster.
- Troll: In earlier episodes. Later weaponized in Episode 10, where he intentionally annoys Ganon into defeat.
Zelda
- Cloudcuckoolander's Minder: Living with the likes of Harkinian and Link, it's a full-time job.
- Daddy's Girl: Loves her father and worries about his health. Also enjoys laughing with him in almost every episode.
- Jerkass Ball: "We were just about to have a feast. ... Without you."
- Odd Friendship: With Link; one would think that the Only Sane Woman Princess and the King's ditzy ward wouldn't have much to talk about, but along with Impa he's the one Zelda confides in, and he in turn holds a high view of her.
- Only Sane Woman: Dealing with Harkinian, Link, and Gwonam makes her seem like the smartest person in the world.
- Parenting The Parent: More mature than Harkinian and often speaks to him as if speaking to a child.
- Sitcom Archnemesis: Becomes this with Gwonam by the end of the series; she's annoyed by her father spending all his time with him, and the two often argue.
- Surrounded by Idiots
- Unrequited Love Switcheroo: Asks Link for a kiss but is told he gave up on her "years ago"... but that he still loves her.
- Will They or Won't They?: With Link.
Gwonam
Harkinian's herald and best friend with a flying carpet and a penchant for Koridian lingo.
- The Ace: "G's cool. G's hip with it."
- Ambiguously Brown
- Butt-Monkey: Not as bad as Link, but he gets saddled with scrubbing all the floors and gets his house stolen by Michael Rosen.
- Cloudcuckoolander: His priorities are... odd.
- Cool Old Guy
- Deadpan Snarker
- Dirty Old Man: Shows up in Harky's bathtub "nakey", and tries to get with Link, who is underage.
- Grumpy Old Man: It's hard to blame him, though, considering what he puts up with.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With King Harkinian.
- Jerkass to One: Link, until he finds out he's mentally ill. Seems to shift his vitriol to Zelda later.
- Mr. Exposition: This is basically his job.
- My Name Is Not Shazam: His name is NOT Squadala!
- Not So Above It All: Often groans at Harkie's eccentricities, but he himself pulls weird shipt as well; like showing up in the King's bathtub naked, playing "sentimental" music under emotional moments, forcing Kordian lingo, and "recapping" events that didn't happen in episode 12.
- Only Sane Man: Sometimes...
- Out-of-Character Moment: Attempting to proposition Link in Episode 10. Nowhere else in the series indicates that he's attracted to Link.
- Sitcom Archnemesis: With Zelda.
- Totally Radical: His insistence on using Koridian Lingo.
- Toxic Friend Influence: Depending on the episode. On the one hand, he helps Kingy overcome his anxieties. On the other, he enables his unhealthy alcoholism and at one point sets his face on fire just for YouTube views.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: With all three of the main characters.
The King's Court
Impa
- Cool Old Lady
- Informed Deformity: The King's song describes her as "fat and ugly", but she appears average for an older woman.
- The Mentor: The only older female guidance Zelda has in her life.
- Nice Girl: A bit bumbling but overall as sweet as she was in the original game. She always assures Zelda that Harkinian will be OK, and tries to reminisce about high school with Link before Harkinian makes fun of her age and tells Fari take her away.
Fari
- Ambiguously Brown: Hyrule Gang continues a common YTP trend of portraying Fari as Hispanic. ("Si, Senior King!")
- Jerkass Ball: Normally a loyal servant to the King, willing to indulge his strange hobbies in, in Episode 12 he tells him to "Piss off, your Majesty!" when all the King wanted was to hang out with somebody.
- Motor Mouth: "Dukeonkledbeyrayedthekingdukeon..."
Around the Kingdom
Morshu
A shopkeeper, and Harkinian's on-off boyfriend.
- Catchphrase: Mmmmmmmmmmm...
- Domestic Abuser: Openly admits to this and has no remorse; in Episode 12 he humiliates Harkinian For the Lulz.
- Jerkass: "Yes I'm a dick to Kingy, but I can't give a shit."
- Lack of Empathy
- Laser-Guided Karma: Along with Ganon, they humiliated the King for "teh lulz", so he humiliates them back.
- Fat Bastard: The biggest (literally and figuatively) asshole in the show.
- The Friend Nobody Likes: Everyone agrees he's a dick, he doesn't seem to like them much either, yet he still dates the King and hangs out in the castle.
- No Accounting for Taste: Sure, Harkinian has his... eccentricities. But why a powerful, fun-loving monarch willingly dates an ugly merchant-class man with an awful personality who hates his guts is anyone's guess.
- Sitcom Archnemesis: To Link, and strangely enough, the King.
- Slap-Slap-Kiss: We ONLY see the slap, however; he and Harkinian never really hang out onscreen and are pretty hostile to each other, but apparently they are dating.
- Straight Gay
- Those Two Guys: With Ganon in Episode 12.
- Troll: Likes to mess with Link.
Ganon
The Kingdom's greatest enemy, who also sometimes shows up to chill.
- Affably Evil
- Arch-Enemy: To The Kingdom as a whole, but specifically to Zelda and Link. He still hangs out with them sometimes though.
- Big Bad
- Card-Carrying Villain
- A Day in the Limelight: Normally just there for a quick gag or as an offscreen enemy, Episode 10 is all about his plan to murder Zelda and the King.
- Go-Karting with Bowser: Hangs out with Link & co. despite being their enemy on paper. They seem to enjoy his company more than Morshu's, who's not even a villain, but just a dick.
- Hidden Depths: Enjoys poetry and performs at poetry readings in Bikini Bottom.
- Laser-Guided Karma: Along with Morshu, they humiliated the King for "teh lulz", so he humiliates them back.
- Offscreen Villainy: Zelda offhandedly mentions "battling Ganon's evil legions".
- Politically Incorrect Villain: He has a literal phobia of the mentally ill.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: "I'll show myself out!"
- Temporarily a Villain: Villainous so little of the time, that his one truly evil plan in Episode 10 almost comes across as this.
- Those Two Guys: With Morshu in Episode 12.
Fat Mario
- Butt-Monkey
- Defrosting Ice King: Towards Link.
- Catchphrase: "No."
- Everyone Has Standards: He finds Link annoying, but is also disgusted by Mary-O's active bullying of him.
- New Powers as the Plot Demands: His mustache glows and has telekinesis in Episode 12.
- Only Sane Man
- The Smart Guy: King Harkinkan tries to invoke this, reasoning they needed him for the mail because "He can wead." Gwonam retorts that so can the rest of them.
- Unexplained Recovery: He koradies and goes to Hell, but shows up later alive and well.
- Vague Age: Presented as a grown man most of the time, but is in high sCOOL in Episode 12.
- Weirdness Magnet: As much as he might not want to be, characters like Mario Head and Link see him as a confidant.
- Why Do You Keep Changing Jobs?: Has been a doctor, a construction worker, a high school student, and of course a plumber.
Gay Luigi
- The Bully: Only when with Mary-O.
- Divergent Character Evolution
- Took a Level in Jerkass: When he starts hanging out with Mary-O.
Duke Onkled
- Adaptational Heroism: In his original game, he's a sniveling, cowardly traitor. Here, he's shown as nothing but loyal to the King. However, see Ambiguously Evil.
- Ambiguously Evil: Fari goes on and on about how he "betrayed" the King, but we never see him punished for it. Perhaps he IS plotting against him, but Fari's warnings fall on deaf ears?
- Chronic Backstabbing Disorder: If Fari is correct about him.
- Nice Guy: When the King takes the cinnamon challenge, he gives him water instead of laughing like Morshu and Ganon.
High sCOOL
Michael Rosen
- Ambiguously Gay: If his rap in Episode 7 is canon and he did, indeed, fuck the King. However, this was in a YTP the King made in-universe.
- The Gadfly: Seems to exist to make things more difficult for everybody.
- Jerkass
- Sadist Teacher: -After sending Link to the Principal's office- "I love my job!"
- The Sociopath
Principal Frollo
- Adaptational Nice Guy: In Hunchback, he's a genocidal hypocrite who abuses his adopted son. In "Hyrule Gang", he's a long-suffering grump who still physically abuses Link, but is overall genuinely trying to help.
- Cool Old Guy
- Cool Teacher: Despite being annoyed by Link, he immediately knows he's not the one causing trouble and gives him advice on dealing with bullies.
- Grumpy Old Man
- Mis-blamed: Refreshingly averted. He knows right away that Rosen is full of shit and that Link wasn't the one causing trouble.
- Only Sane Employee: At High sCool.
- Only Sane Man
Mary-O
- The Bully
- Jerk with a Heart of Jerk: Appears to have taken Link's speech to heart... Gilligan Cut to Link in the dumpster.
- Palette Swap: A version of Hotel Mario's title character wearing purple and with a higher voice.
Other
Mario Head
- Eldritch Horror
- Knight of Cerebus: Treated so in-universe.
- Nightmare Fuel: to The King.
- The Sociopath: Low-functioning, as he makes no secret his desire to mutilate people and steal their shipt.
Weegee
Spob
Prick
Phil
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