In addition to the main, playable cast of Grand Theft Auto, the radio characters also shine and tend to be another connection point in-between games, or in a few cases, continuities. Characters from TV shows are also included here.
Perhaps the only character to appear in every major installment of Grand Theft Auto, Lazlow is introduced in III as host of Chatterbox FM, where he is bombarded with a colorful array of guests and insane people. Lazlow would often mention his stint on a rock station — V-Rock from Vice City, having taken over from its former DJ, Couzin Ed (as heard on Vice City Stories, where he was an intern). After he quit in a rage, Lazlow eventually landed a job as a DJ of WCTR's Entertaining America in San Andreas, where after only two shows, he also quit. By the time IV took place, Lazlow was the washed-up host of Integrity 2.0, trying, failing, and desperately making a comeback. As of V, his career seems to be looking up again, with him hosting the Reality Show Fame or Shame and having returned to WCTR with a new show, Chattersphere.
Lazlow is voiced by real-life radio personality Lazlow Jones, who wrote most of the radio scripts from III onwards.
- Adam Westing: Lazlow is a real-life radio personality and many of his dialogue throughout the Grand Theft Auto series since III feature parodies of his profession.
- Especially in Vice City Stories, where he is the co-host/intern to Couzin Ed, who constantly belittles him for his high-pitched voice, his long hair and so on.
- In V, he gets humiliated not once, but twice, for acting inappropriately towards Michael's daughter Tracey. The first time, he gets chased into a drainage ditch by Michael and Trevor and is forced to do an unflattering dance with his pants around his ankles as Trevor recorded him on his phone. The second time, Michael gives Lazlow a number of humiliating piercings before cutting off his ponytail and tattooing a penis on him.
- Blue Oni, Red Oni: His oni code has somewhat gone into a drastic scale - By Vice City Stories, he was the purple oni to Couzin Ed's red, then 2 years later he mellowed out into a cool blue throughout the series until he gets reduced to a egotistical, idiotic and jerky red in the HD universe.
- Butt-Monkey: In Vice City Stories, as intern to Couzin Ed. Ed would frequently berate and humiliate Lazlow in-between the songs.
- Deadpan Snarker: It wouldn't be Lazlow without him mocking his guests, or himself.
- Dumbass DJ: Pretty much inverted in III, where he is the Only Sane Man, while his guests and callers are anything but smart.
- Flanderization: Ignoring the chronological order of the games, Lazlow gets more pathetic in each new game released. Lazlow starts off as the Only Sane Man in III, mocking the sea of lunatics who call him. Vice City had him as a fairly normal, if egotistical, rock host. In San Andreas, he had no bite and was mostly at the mercy of his guests. By IV, he was a sad wash-up, and in V, he's bitter and angry, in a job he hates, with a co-host he hates, in a town he hates. He spends the majority of his segment arguing with his coworker, on the defensive about his life choices. And to cap it all off, when he actually appears in V's story, it's so he can getting physically humiliated — twice — by the main characters.
- Hates the Job, Loves the Limelight: As shown in San Andreas, Liberty City Stories, and III, he tries to love the job and likes being on the radio. His grief mostly comes from the callers and interviewees.
- He Who Must Not Be Seen: Until V.
- Klingon Promotion: In San Andreas, after the original Entertaining America host is shot on air, Lazlow takes the spot.
- The Last DJ: Believes himself to be this.
- Only One Name: Despite having the last name of Jones in real-life, the GTA Lazlow is only ever addressed by his first name. Lampshaded in V by his Chattersphere co-host Michelle, who calls him "Mr. Lazlow I-don't-have-a-surname".
- Only Sane Man: Tries to run his shows normally, but is swamped by insane guests and callers. By GTA standards, Lazlow is fairly tame... at least at first.
- Self-Deprecation: You would think Lazlow would make himself into a Canon Stu, being the producer of the radio shows in the series in Real Life, but even in III, when he had the most virtual air time, the best he could do was snark about his situation. By IV, he has turned his character into a deluded, egotistical jerkass who believes himself to be The Last DJ, and is genuinely surprised and offended when people call him out on it. And in V, when he finally appeared as an in-story character, it was so he could be forced to dance in his underwear and get a dick tattooed on either his chest or back. Plus, he gave some of his Real Life buddies roles on the shows.
- Separated by a Common Language: In San Andreas, Lazlow and OG Loc have two very different definitions of "gang banging"."Gang banging? I never really understood that. I mean, other guys in the room while you're... ugh!"
- Small Name, Big Ego: Becomes this come IV.
Fernando is introduced on Chatterbox in GTAIII as the founder of Fernando's New Beginnings, where where husbands relieve the stress of married life by getting a mistress, to Lazlow's disgust and accusations of being just a cheap pimp from Upstate Liberty. Fernando's career, like Lazlow's, started in Vice City Stories where he was the co-host of Emotion 98.3 alongside Lionel Makepeace. By 1986 he became sole host of the station, but was kicked out for unknown reasons where he eventually became a temporary host of the Lonely Hearts show on San Andreas's WCTR. By 2008 he became the host of Vice City FM, and has admitted to having several children, being a registered sex offender not allowed within 200 yards of a school, and having a sexually transmitted infection. As of 2013, he has returned to San Andreas and WCTR, hosting his own segment The Fernando Show.
- All Guys Want Cheerleaders: Was arrested for trying to take advantage of a cheerleader while working at a school.
- Alternate Continuity: One of the few signs that the radio stations still work on the principle even in the HD era; In III, Lazlow exposes him as a Caucasian fraudster from upstate Liberty, while in V he claims to be a former illegal immigrant, having come to America the courageous way; see below.
- Anything That Moves: Anything.
- Boomerang Bigot: Believes that the immigration hole needs to be plugged. After all, he came to America the manly way — by outrunning the gunboats.
- Catchphrase: "I, am Fernando Martinez" and "I guarantee it".
- Double Entendre: He gives financial and political advice in the form of thinly-veiled sexual metaphors.
- I Didn't Mean to Turn You On: When Sue Murry gets angry during her interview, he admits that seeing her flustered and sweaty turns him on. She immediately storms out of the studio.
- Latin Lover: So he says. He's more like a borderline sex addict.
- Noodle Incident: In San Andreas, he briefly mentions being "chased out" of Vice City and alludes to a "Five Alarm Fire".
- In V, he mentions that he was "a martyr for the justice and truth that lives in the heart of every man and woman" when he was "unjustly imprisoned on entirely unproven allegations''. He elaborates no further, though a few hints are dropped that he may have been involved with an underage girl.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: The purple to Lionel Makepeace's and Jo's blue.
- Serenade Your Lover: Fernando references this."Have you noticed how popular synthesizers are getting? It's not the same as a lonely man with a pony tail, singing of his love on a guitar. At the door of a fair maid's hacienda. But it is not far short."
- Straw Misogynist: He's been in classes to stop thinking of women as objects for his insatiable lust; he relapses constantly, though he Apologizes a Lot for it.
- Teacher/Student Romance: He finds it a Double Standard that people applaud a boy that scores with a female teacher, but when a male teacher tries to "teach a cheerleader in the ways of love", they're arrested.
- Third-Person Person: Always refers himself in third-person.
Double Clef FM
Liberty Tree entertainment correspondent and DJ of Double Clef FM. Makes cameos on Vice City's K-Chat and on the Liberty City Story's Double Clef FM.
- Born in the Wrong Century: "I normally hate anything the world has achieved since 1836".
- Critical Research Failure: Invoked. He claims to read "Proust in the original Italian" (Proust wrote in French), attributes "Lolita" to Federico Fellini, and so forth.
- Hypocrite: During Liberty City Stories, he makes a call to Sergio (then host of Double Clef FM) and criticizes him for playing mostly Italian composers. Morgan does the same thing three years later.
- Know-Nothing Know-It-All: Attempts to appear intellectual through references to classical culture that he often gets wrong.
The energetic co-host of the Drum & Bass station MSX FM (MSX 98 in Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories). He constantly raps over the tracks mixed by the off screen DJ Timecode.
- Motor Mouth: Going on non-stop for 25 minutes in III with only short pauses in-between his lines is quite an accomplishment. His rapping is far less energetic and frequent in LCS.
Introduced as the DJ of Flashback FM in III, later appears as the Host of Flash FM in Vice City and Vice City Stories.
- Born in the Wrong Century: More like Born In The Wrong Decade. As the DJ of Flashback FM, she constantly reminisces about the 1980s. Even alluded to before a commercial break.Toni: So my friends say "Toni, do you remember the 80s?", and I say "Well, I certainly don't remember anything else since then!"
- Brick Joke: In III, after the song "She's On Fire", Toni claims that she's never been on fire, at least not to her knowledge. In Vice City, set fifteen years earlier, she claims to have accidentally set her hair on fire using hairspray.
- Hard-Drinking Party Girl: Most of the time she spends on-air is talking about how good yesterday's party was.
- The Hedonist: As the DJ of Flashback FM, Toni reminisces about her hedonistic lifestyle during the 1980s.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Despite how hyperactive she sounds, she still comes off as the blue (or at least purple) to Teri's red, as Teri is much more intense.
- Running Gag: In Vice City, she constantly states that she expects to do something important with her life by the time she's 30 — the joke is that she is ironically still a radio DJ fifteen years later, in Liberty City's Flashback FM.
- Valley Girl: Very fluent in Valspeak.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: With Teri. They exchange vicious insults regarding the other's sexual and drug habits, with Toni often gaining the upper hand, but they must have a certain degree of affability if Teri considered having sex with her while drunk possible.
- What Did I Do Last Night?: After "Easy Lover" by Phil Bailey and Phil Collins, Teri asks: "Did we screw last night? I was so wasted!", to which Toni replies that if they did, she doesn't remember it.
VCPR (Vice City Public Radio)
In 1980, Maurice Chavez worked as a clown in birthday parties, corporate functions, juvenile correctional facilities, bar mitzvas and Go-Go bars. After constant failed acting auditions and getting work as a fluffer in a sex-education video, he considered getting a sex change before he was discovered and became a radio personality on Vice City's VCPR. He hosted the "healthy" public debate show Pressing Issues in 1984, and by 1986, won several awards and was granted extended showtime on the radio. Though he tries to run his shows normally, they often become out of control due to the insane guests, and Chavez would snap violently. It is revealed in Vice City Stories that he had an affair with VCPR host Michelle Montanius and had a child with her, but refused to give her the money for the abortion.
- Beware the Nice Ones: Generally pleasant, but he can (and often does) lose patience in the face of his guests' shenanigans. He even hits Jeremy Robard in the face with a paperweight.
- Butt-Monkey: Revealed in part thanks to extreme right-wing Congressman Alex Shrub.Maurice: I grant you, 1980 was not a highlight in my career; but I NEVER applied for a sex change!
- Deadpan Snarker: He can be.
- Delivery Guy: His experience with Bryony Craddock, one of his guests during his show's VCPR segment days in Vice City Stories, puts him off going near a vagina ever again.
- Hates the Job, Loves the Limelight: Much like Lazlow, he loves being on the radio but really loathes the guests on his show.
- Only Sane Man: Maurice has at least tried to run healthy debate shows with serious topics such as public safety, morality and positive thinking and is shown to be a history major. When he snaps though...
- Overly Narrow Superlative: He insists that his clown act was good and that he was once voted for "best up-and-coming dietary-restricted comic act in the whole of Vice City." He didn't even win that, though; he lost to Mary the Meat-Free Mime.
Borderline-insane fundamentalist "pastor" whose stated goal is to collect donations from his followers to build a rocket ship/statue of himself and then colonize Saturn with everyone who gave generously enough, leaving the sinful world behind to build a utopia. His real goal is to fleece as much money from his flock as possible, then use it to build a mansion in Hawai'i and live out the rest of his days with his mistresses. He's on the Morality segment, and he makes a small visual cameo at the beginning of the game on Cortez's yacht.
- Artistic License Astronomy: Unless he's looking to colonize The Moons of Saturn, he probably won't have much success building his dreamed-of society on the surface of a gas giant. Justified, given that he's planning to steal all the money for his own personal use, which means he didn't care one bit about coming up with a feasible plan.
- Berserk Button: Don't be naked and loving in his presence unless you want an emasculating gunshot wound.
- Corrupt Church: Between his theology (a parody of "prosperity gospel" taken to the point of lionizing greed as a virtue) and the fact that he's shamelessly ripping off his followers, he seems to be based on any number of infamous televangelists from The '80s.
- Eye Beams: He plans on installing these in his statue/spaceship in order to smite all of the world's sinners.
- The Fundamentalist
- * Greed
- Insane Troll Logic: He seems to be based on this.
- Listing The Forms Of Degenerates: "Liberals, degenerates, the Welsh..."
- Our Founder
A nudist whose ambition is to fund more nudist-friendly establishments in Vice City, such as a casino. He also wrote a book on nudism, entitled As Nature Intended. He is separated from the other panelists by a divider during his time on Pressing Issues.
- Desperately Craves Affection: He gets increasingly frustrated at having to sit behind the divider, complaining that he's lonely and needs a hug.
- Meaningful Name: His first and last name are both references to nudity.
- Multiple-Choice Past: He claims that he discovered nudism while on holiday in Germany. Later he says that as a child he demanded to go to school naked. When questioned by Maurice, Barry admits that he lies a lot.
- Naked People Are Funny: He constantly disrupts the program with his antics, whether it's preaching about nudism or sneaking past his divider.
Host of K-Chat, a celebrity talk show.
- Captain Oblivious:
- The Ditz: Amy is sweet, but anything intellectual flies right over her head.
- Squee!: Has this reaction over meeting Love Fist on air.
A guest on K-Chat. A radical feminist who wrote a book that talked about the "horrors" of man, officially titled "Being and Seeing, From Freud to the Building Sites, a Woman's Journey into the Male Psyche". While being interviewed it is implied Michaela takes on a manly appearance.
- All Men Are Perverts: "You know Couzin Ed always dives for the hole. Hole-y diver."Couzin Ed: Couzin Ed here, as in "cousin" you can sleep with and tell your mom. Hell, bring your mom as well! I probably had her anyway.
- As Himself: Or better, an overly masculine, more Jerkass-y version of himself.
- Jerkass: Constantly makes fun of Lazlow, bashes on liberals and calls all women sluts.
- Guttural Growler: Pretends to have one for most of the time on-air.
- Knife Nut
- Metal Head: The quintessence of one.
- Patriotic Fervor: A straw Conservative, he admires Reagan and calls a caller a "Commie bitch" for insulting his radio nickname.
- The Pornomancer: He even manages to get some gals to show him their breasts on-air.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: The red to Lazlow's purple.
- Ambiguously Bi: On one hand, she openly admits to sleeping with the station's manager, who's stated to be a man. On the other hand, she at one point asks Toni: "Did we screw last night? I was so wasted!", to which Toni replies that if they did, she doesn't remember it.
- Hard-Drinking Party Girl: Most of the time she spends on-air is talking about how good yesterday's party was.
- Put on a Bus: It is hinted that Teri, in her mid-twenties, was considered too old to be hosting Flash FM and was probably fired by 1986, a spoof of the high turnover rate of MTV VJs due to age, leading to Toni's rise as the sole DJ of the station and the reason why she's hosting Flashback FM alone.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: The red to Toni's blue.
- STD Immunity: Averted.Teri: Do there sores make me look like a whore?Toni: Umm... Yes?
- Vitriolic Best Buds: With Toni.
- What Did I Do Last Night?: "Did we screw last night? I was so wasted!"
The DJ of the electro and hip-hop pirate radio station Wildstyle. In real life, he hosted Rap Attack, a New York radio show in the 80's which was the first rap exclusive show to air on a major station. He passed away on the 2nd October 2009.
The host of Fresh 105, a pirate radio station broadcasting from a stripclub who speaks solely in Cluster F-Bombs. Gets really mad when Oliver Biscuit offered him to buy the station, but still ends up selling it by the events of Vice City.
- As Himself: Played by 2 Live Crew member Luke Skyywalker.
- Cluster F-Bomb: Luke's only method of communication.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: Unlike the calmer Mr. Magic.
Oliver "Ladykiller" Biscuit
The host of Fever 105, who seduces as many women as the amount of food he eats in a week.
- Awesome Mc Coolname: Oliver "Ladykiller" Biscuit.
- Big Eater: Talks about this on the show often.
- The Casanova
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: He is pretty much Barry White and every other baritone romantic singer of the 70's.
The DJ of Wave 103 with a love of New Wave and money, alongside a hatred of Music Videos.
- Alternate Aesop Interpretation: In-Universe, he claims that "I Ran" is a satire of the music industry.
- Blue Oni, Red Oni: The blue to Trish's red.
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: Of many New Romantic musicians.
- Off-Model: Interestingly, his official artwork has two variations. His picture on the soundtrack cover◊ gives him grey eyes and black and white clothing with hair to match. However, his wallpaper artwork pictured above gives him a grey and white outfit with black, blue and white hair as well as blue eyes. Also, he only has one glove now.
- Buxom Is Better: Something Trish wholly agrees with while planning to become a VJ on a TV channel.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: The red to Adam's blue.
Fernando MartinezSee Above
- Blue Oni, Red Oni: The blue to Fernando's purple.
- The Eeyore
- In Touch with His Feminine Side: He REALLY is. Fernando even thinks he's taking estrogen as part of his therapy.
- Nice Guy: Not that much, but still way more polite and compassionate than all of the other radio hosts.
- My Greatest Failure: He blames himself for both breakups he went through.
The DJ of Radio Espantoso which plays latin music, Pepe speaks almost exclusively in spanish.
- Gratuitous English: On the few cases where he does speak english.
- Surprisingly Good Foreign Language
Voiced by: Randy Pearlstein
A roided-up action film star, known for appearing in the Evacuator trilogy: Evacuator, Exploder and Special Needs Cop. Once highly regarded, his gradual slide into irrelevance following the end of the Cold War made him incredibly delusional, culminating in him accidentally killing Entertaining America host Billy Dexter on air and had to serve time on death row from 1992 until his parole in 2007, only to get into trouble again with the law three years later, for which he served a smaller sentence. After his release in 2013, Jack, more mentally unhinged than ever, began working in his own reality show "Jack Howitzer is Jack Howitzer in Jack Howitzer".
- Action Hero: Used to play such roles back in his heyday.
- Bald of Awesome: He sported one throughout his career, as shown in his first actual appearance in V.
- Companion Cube: After going into prison again, Jack stole a sock from the prison's laundry room and started talking with it. By the time he got out of prison, he had named it "Ho Chi Sock" and dressed it up as a Vietnamese soldier, making it a co-star on his new reality show.
- Creator Breakdown: In-Universe, he suffers one due to his declining popularity as well as a paradigm shift following the end of the Cold War. Come San Andreas, he believes the Soviets could still attack despite their breakup a year prior to the game, and culminates in him accidentally killing Billy. After his first release from prison, he's still unhinged, and uses his sock puppet Ho Chi Sock to cope.
- Meaningful Name
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: Based off of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone.
- Noodle Incident: Nothing is mentioned as to what crime got him a second stint behind bars, although this may be related to his accidental murder of an infant.
- Patriotic Fervor: He plays up this trope Up to Eleven, both in the movies and in his real life.
- Shell-Shocked Veteran: Combines this with Phony Veteran, as while he is an actor who has never served in the army, he certainly acts like he has.
"Thor"Voiced by: Frank Fava
A modern day viking and motivational speaker. Made his books from the old runes.
WCTR (West Coast Talk Radio)
WCTR's news anchor, who also introduces and closes each individual show.
- Deadpan Snarker: Particularly when doing show intros and outros.
- No Indoor Voice: When reading the news.
- Punny Name: "Lie and" Forget.
- Stealth Insult: Introduces the Billy Dexter-run Entertaining America by calling it "the most exciting thing since the lobotomy".
WCTR's news anchor. Later appears on Liberty City Stories' LCFR, having been apparently fired for participating in the looting amidst the riot at the end of his home game.
- Groin Attack: On the receiving end from the actor who played Jimmy in Vice City's "Just the Five of Us".
- Intrepid Reporter: Zigzagged; while he is heard reporting in rather dangerous places (a detective during a car chase or interviewing a carjacker, for example) he's not exactly a saint, as he goes and eats fast-food with the carjacker just after his interview, can at another point be heard buying drugs and participate in the looting during the riots.
- Kent Brockman News
- Large Ham: Thanks to being frequently drunk or high while on the air.
- Manchild: Even when he's not drunk or high, he tends to act incredibly childish and idiotic.
The host of WCTR's conspiracy show, Area 53, a conspiracy theorist who tends to ignore his viewer's opinions in favour of his own.
- Captain Obvious: Mixed with his conspiracy theorising. He informs listeners of the horrific fact that several species of birds can fly.
- Conspiracy Theorist: Of a different kind from The Truth, who repeatedly phones up to complain at him. Trill favours pro-government conspiracies that make everyone live in fear.
- Noodle Implements: He's doing something in the desert involving a space suit and several Domestebots. One even calls up to tell Trill it knows what he's doing out there.
Peyton and Mary Phillips
The Odd Couple hosts of the political debate show "I Say, You Say". Peyton is a liberal, Mary a conservative and they spout their conflicting interests and opinions whenever they argue with each other or give suggestions to callers about society in San Andreas.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Peyton, since he is implied to be a communist, said that his dream world would be living in a commune with people wearing matching jumpsuits and growing potatoes, which sounds like a stereotype of Soviet Russia.
- Even Evil Has Standards: When speaking with a hypersexualised caller who introduces himself by telling her and Peyton that he is into pleasuring himself, Mary expresses disgust.
- Jerkass: As a strict conservative, Mary has every chance she gets to belittle her callers who do not follow her views, one being an individual who is heavily into diversity in America and sees himself as a transexual.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: Mary strongly supports Fascism, even to the point of telling one of her callers to favour a Totalitarian state. Among other things, she berated a female caller with an eating disorder and looks down on those with lower income than the wealthiest citizens of San Andreas.
- Henpecked Husband: Peyton gets lampooned by his wife's anti-liberal insults.
- Really Gets Around: Mary admitted to Peyton that she slept with the producer, who Peyton claimed to have also did the same, leading to the fact that they may have had a threesome or Peyton might be bisexual.
- Straw Political: Both Peyton and Mary are staunch in their political beliefs and they often go at each others' throats over their contrasting opinions. Their beliefs are so heavily accented to the point that they endorse communism and Fascism respectively. When acknowledging the fall of the Berlin Wall, Peyton only bemoaned that it did as he sympathised with Soviet-run East Germany, with Mary feeling indifferent about it since she is obviously on the capitalistic West's side.
The host of The Tight End Zone, a show based on sports. Despite the show's purpose, Derrick actually talks about the passions surrounding sports rather than the topic itself, which he has little to no interest in it.
The host of his show "Gardening With Maurice".
Forth Right MC
The paranoid DJ of East Coast Hip-Hop radio station Playback FM.
- 0% Approval Rating: Almost every in-between banter has listeners complaining about his self-righteous on-air rants. Even the otherwise good-natured Julio G of Radio Los Santos had something to say about him.Julio G: "They have some cool records, thats cool. But the DJ's whack, let's just face it, he's whack man!"
- Celebrity Paradox: "Rebel Without A Pause" plays on his station.
Radio Los Santos
The calm and collected DJ of Radio Los Santos, the West Coast gangster rap radio station.
- Chick Magnet: The station idents are made up of phone calls from fans of the show. Most of the female callers seem to really like Julio G, to the point that they seem to listen to Radio Los Santos just for him.
- Digital Piracy Is Okay: He forgets to get a radio edit of "I Don't Give A Fuck", but plays it anyway, accepting the fines. As he puts it..."Tupac doesn't give a fuck, and I don't give a fuck either".
- Only Sane Man: He encourages the gangs of Los Santos to find better ways to solve problems and sees Gangsta Rap as a form of escape. This makes him one of the saner guys in the entire series, especially when compared to the other DJs in the game. During the riots he even expresses his more caring side, advising people to keep out of the streets."You people gotta learn the differences between a rapper and a gangster; a rapper is someone who talks a lot and gets paid a lot of money for it, but don't actually run around with a gun. A gangster is a guy with a gun who kills people and spends most of his adult life in prison. They ain't the same thing, yo, no matter what anybody says."
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Despite the music he works with, he rarely swears on the show and is a Nice Guy overall, which lets his reaction to the riots show just how serious the situation has gotten."There's a lot of morons out here really fucking shit up, so I gotta tell y'all, this ain't cool. Chill the fuck out".
The FunktipusThe funky DJ of Bounce FM.
Voiced by: George Clinton
- Celebrity Paradox: Airs "Loopzilla" on the station. Plus, he quotes lines from Parliament-Funkadelic, a music ensemble formed by George Clinton himself.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Very much so, let alone his voice actor being a drug addict. Even one of his callers called him out on his erratic behaviour.
- Keet: Jolly, always relaxed, loves to party and makes wisecracks every time.
The rebellious host of the Alternative Rock station Radio X.
- "Awesome McCool" Name: At least she seems to think so.
- Dead Artists Are Better: Claims that Karl Marx was correct because he is dead.
- Hipster: She hates the previous generation and sees alternative bands not being able to reach a wide market as a good thing.
- Only One Name: She says she can't even remember her last name.
- Perky Goth: Obsessed with death, fire, coughing blood
Tommy "The Nightmare" Smith
The washed up 70's rock star of K-DST.
- Adam Westing: Axl is playing a rockstar who was the frontman of a group that he believes he contributed the most to, but that group has left him behind and ever since, he has been washed up.
- Celebrity Paradox: "Welcome To The Jungle" plays on Radio X.
- Sex, Drugs and Rock & Roll
- Small Name, Big Ego
The outlaw DJ of country station K-ROSE.
- A Date with Rosie Palms: Occasionally sticks a harmonica down her pants and demonstrates her ability to sing along with it.
- Bestiality Is Depraved: Not her, but one heist went wrong when she found her-then husband in bed with the getaway horse.
- Deep South
- I'm a Humanitarian: She strongly implies she's eaten humans before.
- Only in It for the Money: Part of the reason she has so many children is because the government gives her more money with each one.
- Really Gets Around: Says it was nice of K-ROSE to put a saddle instead of a seat, since she's more at home with her legs splayed out.
- Serial Spouse: She has had six husbands (all of which have ended up dead) and nine children. Her six husbands are implied to be in the body bags found in the infamous mass grave Easter Egg.
- Sophisticated as Hell: Not her, but her mother, whom Mary-Beth quotes during "Queen of Hearts"."Life is a transitory set of signifiers, and the dialectic will come out", as my momma said, when daddy got drunk an' horny with the pigs.
San Fierro Underground Radio (SF-UR)
The hypersensitive German DJ of SF-UR who pioneers House Music on the west coast, much to the objections of his father.
- Cloud Cuckoolander: He is apparently on drugs while on air. It shows.
- Gratuitous German: Ja!
- Where Did We Go Wrong?: His father wanted him to listen to Richard Wagner and get into opera rather than house.
CSR 103.9 (Contemporary Soul Radio)
Phillip "PM" Michaels
The DJ of CSR 103.9, who is trying to be very successful despite bad luck.
- Small Name, Big Ego
- Straw Misogynist: He is incredibly sexist towards women, treating them as nothing but objects.
Master Sounds 98.3
Johnny "The Love Giant" Parkinson
The DJ of Master Sounds 98.3.
- Momma's Boy: Despite owning a radio station, he actually lives with his parents; his mother would sometimes interrupt him whilst he is on air.
- The Napoleon: He views his shortness as compact and his sexual organs as large.
- Small Name, Big Ego: Once you have heard from one of his callers that he is actually small in appearance, you know he is less than the giant he thinks of himself as.
- Casting Gag: His voice actor is an actual veteran news anchor of CBS' New York-based 1010 WINS AM.
Another field reporter for Weazel News.
A female field reporter for Weazel News.
- Really Gets Around: She's frigid by admission, and Lori suspects she's having an affair with her own husband.
One of the five studio reporters for Weazel News.
One of the five studio reporters for Weazel News.
Blaine County Talk Radio
Bless Your Heart
Hostess of Bless Your Heart, a program that shares Southern cooking recipes, lifestyle-affirming far-right politics, and tips on creative use of coupons.
- Ambiguously Orange: Her and her producer, but it's a very ''natural'' shade of orange.
- Catchphrase: "Bless your heart(s)!", repeated ad nauseam, at least thirty or forty times within a typical episode.
- Comfort Food: Insists that grotesquely unhealthy fried food is actually healthy, and it's really those "nutri-Nazis" stressing people out about proper diets that causes heart disease.
- Deep-Fried Whatever: Candy bars, butter sticks, cigarettes, onions, hairspray, pets... Bobbi will try them all. She's even mentioned deep-frying Sprunk in the past.
- Enforced Plug: A lot of conversations with her producer Ricky serve only to advertise Bobbi's newest cooking utensil or home spray tan.
- Nightmare Fuel Station Attendant: Describes cheerfully how, because of her anti-vaccine stance, one of her stepchildren died in agony from polio at the age of seven. She then disposed of his corpse in a huge bonfire in the backyard, hosted a family barbecue over his ashes, and — per his dying wishes — named a casserole after him, calling it "Cripple's Crockpot".
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: Of Paula Deen, Georgia-born celebrity chef, complete with references to controversies related to her alleged racism. On a lesser note, she's a general parody of the celebrities who endorse the anti-vaccination movement.
- Nutritional Nightmare: Every single dish.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: She's been accused of saying "hurtful things, y'all"."I don't judge people! ...Well, not white people."
- Sweet Home Alabama: Desperately tries to invoke this trope, though between her thinly-veiled racism and Tea Party-esque political stance she belongs squarely to the Deep South camp.
- Real Men Eat Meat: The descriptions of some of her recipes are absolutely nauseating, even by the standards of dedicated meat lovers.
- Voiced by: Melissa van der Schyff
One of the three guests on Bless Your Heart. She is a famous pop singer who has turned to a conservative Christian route with her new country song "I Like Things Just The Way They Are". She appeared in Grand Theft Auto IV previously in some news articles.
- Blatant Lies: During the show, Bobby asks her about a magazine telling her that she tried to commit suicide and had a fling with a foreigner. She tries claiming both as accidents and not in any way related to a career breakdown or a split up.
- Big, Screwed-Up Family: She adopts kids from several Third World countries, likely to increase her status symbol, yet news reports claims she keeps them away from her because she cannot stand them, and apparently sent one home. In addition, Samantha also has suicidal tendencies and a stressful breakup.
- Creator Breakdown: In-Universe - Going through the early stages of one during Grand Theft Auto V.
- Deep South: What Samantha is trying to invoke in her music route.
- Money, Dear Boy: In-Universe - It's very obvious that her new country route was done as a way to try make her much more relevant.
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: A parody of Madonna. She even mentions trying to switch to Kabbalah.
- Ooh, Me Accent's Slipping: Her obviously-fake country accent slips slightly during the show.
Animal husbandry expert, rodeo champion, and host of Beyond Insemination, a show that has far more to do with Earl's own opinions of what constitutes a real man (i.e., himself) than any sort of farming advice.
- Anti-Role Model: Recalls his days as a grade-school soccer coach teaching his students to do anything to win, from taking steroids to gambling to deliberately injuring opponents.
- Big Fancy House: Duane's description of his estate (including an enormous fish tank in his bedroom), which somewhat negates his claims that he's still just a humble country boy.
- Comedic Sociopathy: Tells Mike, one of his callers, to drown his wife unless she allows their son to play football, so the family can earn enough money for Mike to buy himself a bass boat.
- Early-Bird Cameo: Appears in the "My Blaine County" commercial, which was released on the Rockstar website as part of the countdown to the game's release.
- Everyone Has Standards: Bestiality is a no-no for him."Goddammit. You are sitting there with a hot laptop on your sweaty thighs doing image search for heifers, aren't you? Jesus... I'm tired of you sickos calling up and ruining my otherwise flawless broadcasting flow!"
- Expy: His general scummy-and-proud-of-it demeanor, especially the anecdotes of his coaching days, make him very similar to McBride's much more well-known character, Kenny Powers.
- Noodle Incident: "I was once a fifth-grade soccer coach; do not ask."
- Rated M for Manly: The point of his show.
- That Came Out Wrong"Next caller. Inseminate me. No, no, no, that's wrong. Speaketh to me."
Blaine County Radio Community Hour
Ronald "Ron" Jakowski
A Conspiracy Theorist who airs his own podcast during BC Community Hour, during which he rambles about various sinister plots against the free world, and occasionally fields questions from his equally deranged audience (including his friend "Philip Trevors", who is very adamant against appearing on the show).
- For more information, see Grand Theft Auto V - Friends, Family, and Associates.
West Coast Talk Radio
Lazlow's (unwilling) co-host for WCTR's Chattersphere. A millennial who holds nothing but contempt for her co-host.
- Deadpan Snarker: Frequently.
- Jerkass: Constantly feuds and fights with Lazlow on the air.
- No Sympathy: When Lazlow breaks down on the air about his pathetic life, she doesn't show him any sort of sympathy and instead notes it's proof "male menopause" exists.
- Younger and Hipper: Is relatively new to the radio game, something Lazlow doesn't like.
Dr. Ray De Angelo Harris
Licensed doctor, expert on New Age medicine, and host of Chakra Attack.
- Berserk Button: When Cheryl reveals she sees giving to public radio as being pointless and patronising; "You have to give yourself and your money to public radio, you understand? Do I have to break this down to you, woman? Shut your mouth! That's public radio you're talking about. I am for profit, but many are not. You are barely talking on the show! How am I supposed to teach you the ways of broadcasting, the ways and means, what I means?"
- Catchphrase: "Ommmmm"
- Cloudcuckoolander: The man is obsessed with duality.
- Disappeared Dad: He admits that the only reason he got into talk radio is so that he could find his dad. In the next gen versions of the game, he does end up finding him.
- Hot-Blooded: One might think that a spiritual guru would be a little less excitable, but Harris spends almost the entire program yelling at the top of his lungs.
- I am a compassionate lover and a fierce warrior!
- Hypocrite: In one episode alone, there is mention that he had a "mandatory vegan diet". Later, he claims to only eat raw meat.
- Insane Troll Logic: "When you put sense and nonsense together, what the hell do you got? You got some bullshit going on in your mind!"
- Jerkass: He constantly belittles everyone around him. One of the people calling in does so to give him shit for him wanting to institute mandatory vegan diets and forcing everyone slightly bigger than him to get gastro-band surgery.
- No Indoor Voice: His normal tone of voice is "shouting like a raving lunatic".
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: The red to Cheryl's blue.
Producer for the show and Harris' badgered co-host.
- Bi the Way: She mentions being bisexual when spurning Ray's offer to touch his "special place".
- Blue Oni, Red Oni: The blue to Angelo's red.
- Granola Girl: She's notably called a hippie numerous times both on and off the show.
The Fernando Show
Fernando MartinezSee Above
Fernando's producer who is, as he is keen to point out, a woman.
Republican Space RangersThe television series aired on Weazel about a trio of patriotic American space rangers called The Commander, Dick and Butch.
The Titular Characters
- Bald of Awesome: Dick.
- Big Eater: Butch.
- Cigar Chomper: The Commander.
- Eagleland: Type 2.
- Everyone Calls Him Commander
- FaceHeel Turn: Butch befriends a knowledge-seeking alien in Episode 456. Dick and the Commander were not too pleased.
- Fantastic Racism: They check on and kill "illegal" aliens. This is really a take on the mistreatment of immigrants in the United States and xenophobia.
- Fat Idiot: Butch
- Humans Are Bastards
- Redhead In Green: Butch, although it is just the same suit Dick and the Commander wear.
- Shout-Out: Their helmets are akin to those from the Halo series.
- Take That!: Their personalities are mirrored towards rednecks and conservatives.
- There's No Kill Like Overkill: Once they are done slaughtering aliens, they'll nuke their whole planet.
AliensThey are all friendly and most of them get killed by the Republican Space Rangers.
- Ain't Too Proud to Beg
- Ambiguously Gay: The teacher in the episode "Homecoming".
- Gag Penis: The alien president literally looks like one, who spews urine whenever he speaks.
- Gratuitous Spanish: Julio, much to Dick's frustration.
- National Stereotypes: The Rangers' servants, Julio, Ming Ho and Ivan, who are portrayals of Mexicans, the Chinese and Russians respectively.
- Killed Off for Real
Kung Fu Rainbow Lazer ForceAnimated series about a Power Rangers-esque group of teenage superheroes who stop sex with violence. Aired on Weazel.
The Titular Characters
- Accidental Pervert: Sebastian tried to spy on the Wickenberg High School's stadium but ends up looking at one of their cheerleaders' skirts, prompting his Heroic RRoD.
- Black and Nerdy: Quota.
- Colour Coded Characters:
- Dumb Blonde: Tallulah
- Eye Beams: Sebastian Kaiden uses them to kill his cleaning lady.
- Five-Man Band
- Idiot Hero: Dirk
- Law of Chromatic Superiority: Averted. The leader, Sebastian, is blue, not red.
- Tomboy and Girly Girl: Zoey is the Tomboy, and Tallulah the Girly Girl.
- Token Minority: Quota and Zoey, being African-American and Asian respectively.
- Upper-Class Twit: Sebastian Kaiden
- Valley Girl - Tallulah
- White Anglo-Saxon Protestant: Sebastian Kaiden
Mr. HitzmanThe science teacher of Parvenu Hills Academy and the founder of the Kung Fu Rainbow Lazer Force.
The AntagonistsA quartet of Wickenberg High School students who are the arch-enemies of the Kung Fu Rainbow Lazer Force.
- Ambiguously Gay: The Frenchman.
- Canada, Eh?: The leader.
- Colour Coded Characters:
- Leader: White
- Frenchman: Grey
- Pregnant teen girl: Yellow
- Goth girl: Purple
- Dark Is Evil: Goth girl
- Evil Redhead: Pregnant teen girl
- Good Smoking, Evil Smoking: The Frenchman and pregnant teen girl
- Green and Mean: The leader wears a dark green fluffy hat.
- Light Is Not Good: The rest of the team.
- National Stereotypes: Well... the leader and the Frenchman.
- No Names Given
- Raven Hair, Ivory Skin: Goth girl
Impotent RageTV series following a liberal superhero. Only shown on CNT.
The Titular Character
- Berserk Button: "Eat organic and recycle or I'll have a fit!"
- Blue Is Heroic
- Brought To You By The Letter "R"
- Bourgeois Bohemian
- Clark Kenting: His alter-ego is Braxton Hunter, the entrepreneur of enviro-friendly Braxton Industries.
- Cluster F-Bomb: After he threw his stapler at a vagrant for "not recycling" and killed him, he unleashes a 3-profane-word mutter.Braxton Hunter: Fuck, shit, cunt, piece of...
- Heroic BSoD: He can be very emotional at times.
- Real Men Wear Pink: Wears a pink cape and loves to recycle.
Uber-ManThe right-wing and anti-environmental supervillain and archenemy of Impotent Rage.
Gordon Moorehead Rides Again!Classic detective animated series that once aired on VCPR in 1984 and now on CNT in Los Santos, 2013.
The Titular Character
- Blue Is Heroic: Wears dark blue trousers with work straps, light blue tailcoat, pale blue tie and dark blue fedora and is the central protagonist of his own show.
- Dark Is Not Evil
- Eagleland: He is obviously intended to be Type 1, but his antics makes him come across as Type 2.
- Good Smoking, Evil Smoking
- Would Hit a Girl: He frequently slaps his female partner Molly into keeping quiet throughout the show.
- Butt-Monkey: Gordon usually shuts her up with his slapping whenever she gets very nervous or any other kind of womanly problem that bothers him.
- Buxom Is Better
- Pink Is Feminine
- CIA Evil, FBI Good: Seems to be part of the F.I.B thanks to wearing ID of said agency.
- Da Chief: To Gordon.
Redwood ChiefThe Native American who replaces Pablo's role and joins Gordon.
PabloGordon's good old little Mexican partner and friend.
- Cigar Chomper
- Gratuitous Spanish
- National Stereotypes: Of Mexicans.
- The Pollyanna
- Put on a Bus: Until the end of the episode "Gordon and the Soviet Tit-Wank"; he claimed that he moved back to Mexico for a while to catch a big rest, explaining his reason why he was not seen at the beginning of that episode.
Boris PablovichA Soviet communist behind the Red Scare and the antagonist of the series.
- Artificial Limbs: Metal claws.
- Beard of Evil: Mid-length.
- Big Bad
- Dark Is Evil
- Dirty Commies
- Evil Laugh
- Evil Plan: He wants to dominate America with a Soviet agenda.
- Good Smoking, Evil Smoking
- Husky Russkie
- Red and Black and Evil All Over: Fur coat, black shoes, black ushanka with a red star and a communist.
Princess Robot BubblegumA seinen anime series aired on CNT.
The Titular Character
- Buxom Is Better: To a ridiculous extent.
- Green-Eyed Redhead
- Pink Is Feminine
- Pink Girl, Blue Boy: The Pink Girl to Sword Boy's Blue Boy.
- Ms. Fanservice: Parodied.
Master HentaiPrincess Robot Bubblegum's teacher. Most of the time, he's trying to make money off of Bubblegum's merchandise, and always trying to find new things to market.
Sword BoyA wandering warrior Bubblegum meets in one of her patrols; apparently becomes her boyfriend.
- Ambiguously Bi: Is apparently Bubblegum's boyfriend, but speaks with a stereotypically heavy lisp and is said to "play both sides of the sushi bar" (though it was in a review of a previous episode, and Master Hentai thought it was a terrible analogy).
- Bishounen: Parodied
- Blue Boy Pink Girl: The Blue Boy to Princess Robot Bubblegum's Pink Girl.
- Blue Is Heroic: His hair and the blue torso area on the front of his suit are blue and he is a hero.
- BFS: Obviously a Buster Sword offshoot.
- Heroes Want Redheads: It has been universally declared that he is going to become the main character's official love interest.
- No Name Given: Some call him Blind Swordsman, Wandering Warrior, Gay Cloud, etc. However no one refers to him by name in the episodes proper, he is credited as Sword Boy.
- Not So Harmless: He was pretty mediocre in the IV episodes, in V however he seemly isnt that slow against a Tentacle Rape Plant wanting to tap his girl.
- You Gotta Have Blue Hair
Fame Or ShameA national talent show set in the Maze Bank Arena. The direct parody of America's Got Talent, American Idol and every other real-life talent show across the world. Hosted by Lazlow, aired on Weazel.
See his entry above
Hugh HarrisonThe British judge.
- Alliterative Name
- Berserk Button: He hates it when Lazlow says he isn't really British.
- Deadpan Snarker: As a judge and being British, he really fits the trope to a T.
- Fauxreigner: Lazlow accuses him of only pretending to be British after he votes for Three Masturbating Monkeys over Tracey De Santa. He quickly denies the accusation... in a nasal, American-accented voice.
- The Mean Brit
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: A blatant parody of Simon Cowell.
Anita MendozaThe only female judge for the show and a talented Vinewood actress.
- The Indian judge who is also a yogi practitioner.