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     Freddy Krueger vs. Wolverine 

Freddy Krueger

Played by: WAX
"One, two, Freddy's coming for you..."

  • Adaptational Nice Guy: A heavily downplayed example: while just as cruel and sadistic as ever, this version of Freddy brags about his fan following, while the canon Freddy hated his fans and considered them useless.
  • Alien Blood: He bleeds green after slashing himself as a Self-Mutilation Demonstration.
  • All Girls Want Bad Boys: He claims that "heavy-metal bitches" find him attractive.
  • Alone with the Psycho: The settings Freddy appears in — an Abandoned Playground, a narrow hallway, a dark alley, and a spooky forest all at nighttime — give off feelings of isolation. Even when Wolverine wakes up in his bed and appears to be alone at first, Freddy is still stalking him in the shadows.
  • Attack of the 50-Foot Whatever: He grows to giant size in Wolverine's nightmare.
  • Blade Below the Shoulder: He's got knives on the fingertips of his glove. Wolverine, whose claws are real, isn't greatly impressed.
    Wolverine: I'll call you tomorrow morning if I need my toast buttered.
  • Body Horror: He's covered head-to-toe in burn scars. Wolverine even remarks that Freddy's face looks like "Deadpool's ballsack."
  • Card-Carrying Villain: As in canon; he brags about being the product of a "twisted mind" and claims that beneath his terrifying exterior, there's nothing but the love of killing.
    You got a healing factor? I got a kill-bitches-on-the-ceiling factor
    Under that mask, you're a singer/actor. Under my skin, I'm a slasher/slasher.
  • Catch Phrase Insult: He uses the word "bitch" four times throughout the battle.
  • Chick Magnet: He believes himself to be one. He says this after turning himself into a giant magnet to defeat Wolverine.
    Freddy: As for me, I'm a chick magnet
    So heavy-metal bitches are real attracted.
  • Dirty Coward: Wolverine berates him for preying on sleeping victims, and Logan can even tell just by looking that Freddy is intimidated by him. This is cemented by the final verse, wherein Freddy would rather surreptitiously stalk Wolverine in the background instead of confronting him directly while Logan is actively looking for him and gearing up for a fight.
  • Dirty Old Man: Wolverine mocks Freddy's fascination with young girls.
  • Dream Weaver: He can enter dreams at will and alter them to his choosing, such as turning Wolverine's claws into miniature copies of himself.
  • Dream Within a Dream: After Freddy's second verse, where he seems to be overpowering his opponent, Wolverine wakes up in his bedroom... or so it seems. Freddy keeps appearing subtly in the background, showing that Logan's still asleep.
  • Evil Makes You Ugly: Wolverine repeatedly mocks his burnt appearance, which itself is the result of a "twisted mind".
  • Evil Sounds Deep: He's got a deep, booming voice, the better to scare people.
  • Fedora Of Ass Kicking: He's a powerful killer with a brown fedora; Wolverine can't help but make fun of it.
  • I Was Beaten by a Girl: Wolverine mocks the fact that Nancy Thompson killed him.
  • Iconic Outfit: His brown fedora, red and green striped sweater, and knife glove — all of which are mocked by Wolverine as a "strap-on" and such.
  • Ironic Nursery Tune: He starts out singing his "One-two Freddy's coming for you" rhyme, even doing it in an Abandoned Playground for emphasis.
  • Knight of Cerebus: He seldom has moments of levity, but it really kicks into effect during his second verse, where he starts messing with Wolverine in incredibly freaky ways, just like in his source material.
  • Magnetism Manipulation: In the dream world, Freddy turns his arms into giant magnets to defeat Wolverine.
  • Medium Awareness: He knows that both he and Wolverine are fictional characters, and even uses their respective origins as a diss.
    Freddy: Bitch, I come from Wes Craven's twisted mind.
    You come from comic books that kids get when they're well behaved at Christmas time.
  • Mirror Monster: In the final verse, Freddy briefly replaces Logan's reflection in his bedroom mirror.
  • Mundane Made Awesome: Uses a pair of giant magnets against Wolverine that would look tacky if anyone else wore, but considering the context, it makes it all the more awesome and terrifying.
  • Never Sleep Again: Freddy warns Wolverine to stay awake or he'll be in within Freddy's power.
  • Nightmare Weaver: Freddy specializes in exploiting people's fears to make it easier to kill them in their dreams. He demonstrates this against Wolverine by growing to giant size, depriving Logan of his claws, and turning his (Freddy's) arms into giant magnets to make sure Wolverine can't escape.
  • Offscreen Teleportation: At the end, when Wolverine appears to have woken up in his room, Freddy continues to appear in several places in the background just outside Logan's field of vision.
  • Pædo Hunt: Unlike the original movies, where Freddy was only said to be a child murderer (and any sexual perversions on his part were merely implied), here Wolverine explicitly calls Freddy a pedophile - which was specified to be true in the reboot - and even mentions R. Kelly in reference to the singer's offenses in this category while he's at it.
  • Sadist: True to form, he takes great pleasure in psychologically torturing Wolverine.
  • Self-Mutilation Demonstration: He cuts off two of his own fingers and grows them back to show he means business.
  • Serial Killer: He's murdered countless innocent people over the course of his series, and is now aiming to add Wolverine to the list.
  • Sinister Scraping Sound: In his title screen, we see Freddy dragging his claw across the bottom of the screen, creating sparks and an eerie scraping noise.
  • Sinister Silhouettes: He briefly appears as a shadow in the window behind Wolverine in his bedroom.
  • Slain in Their Sleep: When he kills people in their dreams, they die in the real world, too.
    Freddy: Better stay awake like a meth head.
    Spread red on your bedspread till you're lying there in your deathbed.
  • Take That!: "I was more intimidated by a tiny Canadian the first time I saw Justin Bieber!"
  • This Is for Emphasis, Bitch!: He uses the word "bitch" quite a lot in the battle, but only two lines truly qualify as this trope.
    Welcome to primetime, bitch!
    Bitch, I come from Wes Craven's twisted mind!
  • Torches and Pitchforks: As Wolverine points out, Freddy was burned alive by a vigilante mob of angry parents as revenge for what he did to their children.
  • Voice of the Legion: His voice has a reverb effect that comes and goes, mainly to emphasize certain disses.
  • Weaksauce Weakness: Wolverine points out that Freddy only has power in the dream world, and can't hurt people when they're awake.
    Wolverine: Don't sleep? That's all you got for me? I could defeat your ass with a cup of tea!
  • What Is This, X?: He uses this line to mock Wolverine's codename:
    Freddy: What the fuck is a wolverine? Some kind of an angry beaver?
  • Would Hurt a Child: He's murdered (and apparently molested) countless children, for which Wolverine mocks him as a loser and a coward.
  • X Called; They Want Their Y Back: He uses this line against Wolverine:
    Freddy: A Flock of Seagulls called; they want their hairstyle returned
    And that wasn't even my main diss; it was just a sideburn.
  • You Need to Get Laid: He remarks that Jean Grey won't be in Wolverine's bed anytime soon.
  • You Will Not Evade Me: Freddy turns his arms into giant magnets to pull the Adamantium-infused Wolverine closer, presumably so Freddy can go for the kill. Fortunately, Logan wakes up before he gets too close.


Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"I'm the Adamantium champion X-Man!"

  • '80s Hair: Freddy mocks Wolverine's outrageous hairdo, comparing it to those of A Flock of Seagulls.
  • Actor Allusion: Both Freddy and Wolverine himself make references to Hugh Jackman, who played Wolverine in the movies.
  • The Alcoholic: He flat out says that the only thing that scares him is a fridge with no beer in it.
  • Atrocious Alias: Freddy mocks Wolverine's nickname, reasoning that a wolverine is just "some kind of an angry beaver".
  • Canada, Eh?: Freddy makes a few jokes about Wolverine's Canadian heritage (ending a sentence with "eh?" and then comparing Logan to a beaver and Justin Bieber.)
  • Catapult Nightmare: He kicks off his second verse waking up from his nightmare, screaming and bolting upright in his bed. Mind you, due to his "Weapon X flashbacks" this is normal for him.
  • Chekhov's Gunman: Has was mentioned twice since Season 4 (first by Stan Lee, then by Boba Fett) before finally making an appearance.
  • Cigar Chomper: He's briefly shown puffing on a small cigar before his verse.
  • Damned by Faint Praise: Does this to R. Kelly in his Pædo Hunt burn against Freddy.
    Wolverine: You're a pedophile from the midwest; at least R. Kelly could sing!
  • Dark and Troubled Past: Wolverine says that nothing Freddy conjures up could ever compare to Logan's "Weapon X" flashbacks.
  • Did Not Get the Girl: Freddy mocks him for not getting together with Jean Grey.
  • Escaped from Hell: "I've been to hell and back and whooped Satan's ass"
  • Guttural Growler: He's got a raspy, snarly voice for better intimidation.
  • Healing Factor: He can heal from any injury. Freddy points this out, but isn't impressed because it won't work in a dream.
  • Height Angst: Freddy repeatedly mocks Wolverine's short stature.
    Freddy: Look at the size of your body! How could I possibly think I'm in trouble?
    I can't tell the difference between your action figure and your Stunt Double!
  • Hot Blooded Sideburns: He's got his signature mutton chops, which Freddy mocks.
  • Iconic Outfit: He's wearing his white tanktop/blue jeans/brown belt ensemble from the X-Men Film Series during the last verse.
  • I'm Not Afraid of You: He gets a little shaken and caught off guard a few times, but Wolverine is not frightened by Freddy's tricks at all. Even after a vivid Nightmare Sequence where Freddy disempowers and nearly kills him, Logan isn't intimidated, but enraged.
    Wolverine: You've got the wrong room if you're looking for fear
    The only thing that scares me is a fridge with no beer!
  • Logical Weakness: Because Wolverine's bones are infused with Adamantium, Freddy manages to slow him down by turning his arms into giant magnets.
  • Monochromatic Eyes: Not quite; Wolverine here still has black pupils, but his irises are white like his sclerae, which gives him a subtly unnatural and feral appearance.
  • No-Sell: While the nightmare with Freddy does unnerve him, nothing Freddy does actually hurts Wolverine, and he shakes off the initial fear quickly.
    Wolverine: That verse stung, bub, but I've already recovered.
  • Not Wearing Tights: Averted for most of the battle, in which Wolverine wears a comic-accurate costume (which he rarely does in live-action appearances.) Then in his last verse when he wakes up, the trope is played straight when he's wearing a singlet and jeans like in the movies. Note 
  • Pretender Diss: Wolverine mocks how Freddy's claws are artificial — unlike Logan, whose claws are part of his anatomy.
    Wolverine: Nice glove, bub, but I'm real from bones to teeth.
    That claw's like a strap on: there's a pussy underneath.
  • Take That!: He tells Freddy, "You're a pedophile from the midwest; at least R. Kelly could sing!"
  • Wolverine Claws: Naturally, Wolverine has razor-sharp claws that, unlike Freddy's glove, are actually part of Wolverine's body. In the nightmare, Freddy disempowers Logan by taking away his claws.

     Che Guevara vs. Guy Fawkes 

Che Guevara

Played by: Robert Rico
"Guevara the terror, fresh Kangol wearer; ill rhyme slayer from the '60s era."

  • Always Second Best: Guy Fawkes claims that, no matter how hard Che tries, he'll never live up to a certain other Communist revolutionary of the time:
    Guy Fawkes: Face it, Ernesto: you're Castro, but less so!
    He's Cuba Commander, you're more of the Destro!
  • Aroused by Their Voice: He claims that even if he's asthmatic, his voice will take your breath away.
  • Bourgeois Bohemian: Guy Fawkes mocks Che for the fact that Capitalists have taken his image and turned it into a marketable brand that rakes in huge profits.
    Guy Fawkes: As a communist it must really hurt
    That your face has been cheapened, weakened, besmirched,
    Being plastered on posters, coasters and shirts,
    Making capitalists rich off of you on merch!
  • Chummy Commies: He's a guerrilla fighter and communist revolutionary, true, but he's shown here to be an idealist and optimist for his cause.
  • Cigar Chomper: He lights up a stogie at the end of his second verse...
  • Cigar-Fuse Lighting: When he’s done, he throws his still-burning cigar at Fawks, who bats it away onto one of the powder kegs in Fawkes’ background. Stuff Blowing Up ensues.
  • Clint Squint: As he boasts, "I'm known worldwide for my steely-eyed look."
  • Cold Ham: Most of his first verse has him speak in a low, almost seductive, tone of voice. He carries no less presence than his opponent because of this, however.
  • Dirty Communists: His communism is referenced as both a boast on his part and a diss on his enemy's side.
  • Do Wrong, Right: He disdains Guy Fawkes not for trying to blow up the House of Lords, but for failing and getting caught.
    Che Guevara: You tried to rebel against James the first.
    Here's a tip for your next plot: try to rehearse!
  • Handicapped Badass: "Asthmatic, but I'll take your breath away!"
  • Large Ham: An expressive presence worthy of the telenovelas that Latin America is also known for (and ironic for a person most often represented as a static image).
  • The Man Is Sticking It to the Man: Guy Fawkes points out the irony of Che fighting for communism while his face is on lots of merchandise and is making capitalists rich.
  • Merchandise-Driven: As both he and Guy Fawkes point out, Che's likeness has been used on various merchandise.
  • No Such Thing as Bad Publicity: invoked Doesn't seem all that bothered that his image has been so thoroughly merchandised, despite his communist ideology — in fact, he seems to encourage it at times (he once boasts that his image appears on fridge magnets.) Any way of getting the message out is good enough for him, it seems.
  • Pædo Hunt: Goes out of his way to bring up Catholic child sexual abuse as a diss against Guy's faith.
  • Signature Headgear: He's a self-proclaimed "fresh Kangol wearer."
  • Smug Smiler: Che is one confident Communist.
  • Take That!:
  • Totally Radical: He uses a fair amount of slang from The New '10s, such as “lit,” “Epic Fail,” and “you had one job!” While this works well enough for the most part, his reference to “What Does the Fox Say” six years after that meme had come and gone makes him seem a little late to the party. Alternatively, it fits with his general theme of calling Guy Fawkes a has-been and only being known superficially, therefore comparing him to said outdated memes. Also befitting the fact Che's general popularity is via his famous picture, ergo, the very definition of a meme.

Guy Fawkes

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"I'm a pious man, and I fight for the Lord!"

  • Astonishingly Appropriate Interruption: In the last verse, right before his powder kegs blow up in his face in the most literal way.
    Guy Fawkes: Is it the 5th of November?
    'cause I'm! On! FIRE!
  • Ax-Crazy: Some of Peter's facial expressions during the battle make Guy look more than a little unhinged — and considering that he was plotting to blow up the House of Lords, he'd have to be.
  • Better to Die than Be Killed: As Guevara points out, Fawkes met his end by falling from the gallows and breaking his neck upon impact, thus sparing him the pain of being hanged, drawn and quartered. Che suggests that Fawkes do the same here to avoid being defeated in the rap battle.
  • Bomb-Throwing Anarchists: He's an anti-government radical with a penchant for explosives.
  • Cold-Blooded Torture: He claims he went through horrible torment twice in his lifetime.
    Guy Fawkes: I was tortured until I could hardly sign my name,
    and listening to you felt pretty much the same!
  • Epic Fail: Che Guevara characterizes his failure to blow up a certain government building as a humiliating defeat on Guy's part, even calling him "Epic Fail Guy" to drive the point home.
    Che Guevara: You had one job, cabrón: to strike a matchstick!
    Got caught with a fuse like your bars: not lit!
  • Face Death with Dignity: He realizes he’s about to get blown up at the end of his verse, and he lets off one last boast before accepting his fate.
  • Fashion-Victim Villain: invoked Che describes him as looking like a "porn star pilgrim".
  • Flipping the Bird: Gives the British two-finger salute variation.
    Guy Fawkes: Revolt all you want; I don't give two Guy Fawkes!
  • Hoist by His Own Petard: Literally; at the end, he gets blown up by his own powder kegs.
    • Made even more hilarious when you realize that the only reason why the powder kegs got lit up in the first place is because Fawkes himself backhanded away a cigar that Che threw at him. If he hadn't, the kegs probably wouldn't have detonated.
  • Hypocrite: He mocks Che for getting his image stolen and flipped for profit by corporations and businessmen, despite the same thing having happened to Guy himself; the famous mask bearing his image (which appears throughout the battle) is heavily associated with atheists and anarchists today, which the devoutly religious and absolute monarchist Fawkes would probably not approve of.
  • Large Ham: He shouts most of his lines and his expressions imply him to be a bit...unhinged.
  • Off with His Head!: Che claims that Fawkes' severed head is now on a spike on London Bridge.
  • Real Life Writes the Plot: Peter grew out his beard for the role, which was then shaved down into the mustache and goatee combo that Guy is famous for. He laments that he was only able to wear it for that one day of shooting, because he needed to shave it clean in order to dress up for the Edward Scissorhands cameo that features in Freddy Krueger vs. Wolverine.
  • Real Men Love Jesus: He's proudly devoted to his Catholic faith.
    Guy Fawkes: I'm a Catholic; I got mass when I'm rapping!
  • Religious Bruiser: "I'm a pious man, and I fight for the Lord!"
  • Sexy Whatever Outfit: Che Guevara mocks Guy's signature outfit as making him look like a "porn star pilgrim."
  • Signature Headgear: He's shown with his now-iconic tall, black hat that is mocked by his opponent.
    Che Guevara: And this porn star pilgrim look, what's up with that?
    It's more like V for Very Bad Hat!
  • Stuff Blowing Up: He ends the battle getting blown up thanks to Che’s thrown cigar landing on one of Guy’s powder kegs.
  • Take That!: "Look at Venezuela: what you're fighting for sucks!"

     Ronald McDonald vs. the Burger King 

Ronald McDonald

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"The undisputed GOAT of putting burgers in bellies!"

The Burger King

Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"Welcome to BK! How can I serve you today?!"

  • Authority Equals Asskicking: He claims that because he's a king, he's automatically superior to anything Ronald can throw at him.
    Burger King: You can't beat the king with your crew, please!
    The whole head of your government's name is Mayor McCheese!
  • Catchphrase: Uses both franchises' catch phrases in his raps:
    One flame-broiled ass-clown? Have it your way!

    I ain't loving shit, even if Timberlake sings!
  • Cool Crown: He's a king, you know, so he has a spiffy crown. Although McDonald claims he's the one wearing the crown at the end.
  • Cordon Bleugh Chef: McDonald mocks The Burger King for using Cheetos in their recipes. Ronald also claims that BK's burgers are made of horse lips and ass meat.
  • Fur and Loathing: He's wearing his fur-trimmed robe while dropping bars.
  • Hypocritical Humor: He calls McDonald creepy, but as Wendy hints at, the general public considers him far creepier.
  • Memetic Molester: invoked Wendy mocks his infamous creepy face.
  • Requisite Royal Regalia: Wears a fur-trimmed robe, a crown, and several gold rings on his fingers, clearly indicating that he is of high rank.
  • Toilet Humor: He's not averse to bathroom jokes:
    Your pink slime meat turns my asshole to a drive-thru!

    You're number one, like the whiz I took in your ball pit!


Played by: MC Goldiloxx
"I'm the fast food queen, mean with a Tweet sesh!"

     George Carlin vs. Richard Pryor 

George Carlin

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"My cocksuckin', motherfuckin' bits are the tits!"

Richard Pryor

Played by: ZEALE
"I'm the original brother to give the scene some color! "

  • Bungled Suicide: Robin Williams makes fun of the time he tried to burn himself to death while high on cocaine.
  • A Dick in Name: Joan Rivers calls Richard Pryor "Dick" while bringing up his romantic failures.
  • Flipping the Bird: Gives Carlin the finger at the beginning of the battle (though it's blurred out).
  • Man on Fire: He makes an Obligatory Joke about the time he immolated himself. Robin Williams does the same later.
  • Sad Clown: Jokes about his own childhood traumas and failed suicide attempt. Later, Joan Rivers reminds him about his repeated heart failures and his six failed marriages.
  • Self-Deprecation: Pryor naturally makes a joke about setting himself on fire.
  • Serial Spouse: Joan Rivers mentions his fifth and sixth wives.note 
  • Son of a Whore: "My momma was a prostitute and grandma ran the brothels!"
  • This Is Gonna Suck: When Joan drops her signature "Can we talk?" towards him, Pryor's only reaction is a very meek, worried shaking of his head. True to form, Joan proceeds to immediately tear onto him.
  • The Whitest Black Guy: George Carlin calls him "the least threatening black dude since Carlton!"

Bill Cosby

"I eat emcees for breakfast like they're made of chocolate cake!"

  • Adaptational Karma: He was a case of Karma Houdini Warranty in real life; here, he is Hoist by His Own Petard while performing.
  • Asshole Victim: He gets drugged, smacked and utterly eviscerated by Joan Rivers, but since he's a Serial Rapist, no one's really complaining.
  • Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Joan Rivers rightfully calls him this as he tried to pass himself off as a loving family man, when he's really a serial rapist taking advantage of his good image.
  • Broken Pedestal: While the battle itself doesn't specify it, Joan Rivers got her first big break in show business thanks to Cosby, whom she now understandably expresses nothing but contempt for.
  • Butt-Monkey: Gets drugged and smacked on the head, and spends almost his entire appearance down for the count while Joan Rivers treats him with pure disdain and Robin Williams refuses to even acknowledge his presence.
  • Casting Gag: In a very meta, Take That!-based case of this, he's played by the actor of Uncle Ruckus, a character who embodies negative black stereotypes and internal toxicity to fellow African Americans.
  • Chekhov's Gunman: Previously mentioned by both Mr. T and Donald Trump, the former reference predating the criminal allegations against him and the latter directly pertaining to them.
  • The Chew Toy: His entire appearance in the battle is just to be laughed at and verbally (as well as physically) thrashed by Joan Rivers, all of which he very much deserves.
  • Dude, She's Like in a Coma: Joan Rivers calls him on his repeated acts of Date Rape.
  • Dynamic Entry: He makes a big entrance, and after which things immediately and rapidly go downhill for him.
  • Elephant in the Room: He tries to ignore the multiple rape charges brought against him and pretend that his public image is still what it was during his heyday, but Joan Rivers doesn't let him.
  • Evil All Along: Invoked by one of Joan Rivers' lines, as he is one of the most infamous cases of hidden villainy within modern celebrity culture.
  • Faux Affably Evil: He tries to pass himself off as a warm and friendly man befitting his former image as "America's Dad", but that doesn't negate the fact that he's a convicted sex offender.
  • Fashion-Victim Villain: invoked As Joan Rivers points out, his fashion sense is just as disgusting as he is.
  • Homemade Sweater from Hell: Wearing one of his signature tacky sweaters, which Joan Rivers proceeds to mock.
  • Irony: The only still-living character at the time of upload spends most of the video KO'ed on the floor.
  • Joke Character: Only gets to say two full lines before falling unconscious, and is completely annihilated by Joan Rivers.
  • Karmic Butt-Monkey: He falls unconscious after his pudding gets spiked, gets verbally destroyed by Joan Rivers, and gets whacked with a lamp. Given he's a sex offender notorious for spiking women's drinks to rape them, it's clearly supposed to be karmic payback.
  • Laser-Guided Karma: He's been known to spike drinks to rape women, but in this battle someone spiked his pudding.
  • Persona Non Grata: Joan stops him from rapping, saying he can't be here.
  • Serial Rapist: His whole presence in the battle serves primarily to be called out for his sexual crimes while being subjected to Laser-Guided Karma in a way that amusingly relates to his onstage career as well.
  • Slipping a Mickey: Cosby's pudding was spiked, presumably by Joan Rivers herself, to take him out of the battle similarly to how Cosby drugged the drinks of his victims.
  • Take That!: As the other tropes demonstrate, most of his appearance consists of him being trashed for his crimes, while drugged and unconscious.
  • Tap on the Head: When the drugs start to wear off and Cosby begins to wake up, Joan Rivers smacks him in the head with Robin Williams' genie lamp; amusingly, his interrupted line of "I think my pudding-" indicates that he hadn't even heard any of what she'd said to him up to that point.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: Pudding and chocolate cake.

Joan Rivers

Played by: Jackie Tohn
"So don't throw down with Rivers! The flow is too relentless!"

  • Brooklyn Rage: Rivers has her signature Brooklyn accent and is relentless in ripping into Carlin, Pryor, and especially Cosby.
  • Catchphrase: She uses her signature "Can we talk?" and "Who are you wearing?" at different points in the battle.
  • Ethical Slut: She's open about her active sex life and multiple cosmetic surgeries.
  • Everyone Has Standards: She tells really offensive jokes, but hates sex offenders like Bill Cosby.
  • The Fashionista: She finds Cosby's sweaters were as horrible as he was.
  • Flipping the Bird: She uses her middle finger when mentioning Richard Pryor's sixth wife. Unlike the part where Richard Pryor flips the bird at the beginning of the video, hers is uncensored.
  • Historical Beauty Upgrade: Played by the much younger Jackie Tohn, with no real attempt to replicate the years of plastic surgery apart from a face-lifting wire that pulls the sides of her face up from behind (and the effect is barely noticeable from afar).
  • Incoming Ham: "Oh, SHUT UP, you stupid son of a bitch! You know you blew it!"
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Rivers is an unrepentantly harsh comedian, but she is livid over Cosby's sex crimes and stops him from rapping.
  • Pay Evil unto Evil: Drugs Cosby's pudding and hits him over the head with Robin Williams' lamp. Notably, she actively denies him the chance to have his own verse at all.
  • "The Reason You Suck" Speech: She really lays into Bill Cosby:
    Cosby, you can't be here! You're making people nervous
    So let me end you real quick like I was Hannibal Buress!
    It turns out you were just like your sweater: monstrous!
    The men that I slept with only wish they were unconscious!
    My sex jokes offend, you're on the sex offender registry!
    Oh, who are you wearing now? Is that State Penitentiary?
  • Refuge in Audacity: She was someone for whom no material was off limits, and this battle is no exception.
    (to Carlin and Pryor) I'd have attacked you two first, but your hearts beat me to it!
  • Self-Deprecation: In true Joan Rivers fashion, she claims that the men she's slept with "only wish they were unconscious!" and describes herself as "more plastic than flesh".
  • Speak Ill of the Dead: She casually jokes about how George Carlin and Richard Pryor died, and even says she's glad Carlin died because he was becoming too much of a Long Runner.

Robin Williams

Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"I'm a genie in a bottle for some comic relief!"

  • Ascended to a Higher Plane of Existence: Upon his final line, he "sets (him)self free" and flies off into the sky.
  • Carpet of Virility: States outright that he has more hair on his arms than Monchichi, a series of stuffed toy monkeys from Japan.
  • Fun Personified: He's shown as a boundlessly energetic, happy-go-lucky fellow whose disses toward the others never get more scathing than gentle ribbing.
  • Genie in a Bottle: Comes out of a genie lamp as a reference to his most famous role.
  • Hurricane of Puns: His verses contains multiple puns based on his filmography.
  • Motor Mouth: As befits the Rockin' Robin himself, he has a very fast-paced delivery.
  • Nice Guy: Unlike the other participants in the battle, his barbs are more good-natured ribbing than anything.
  • Pie in the Face: He brings his face down into a cake at one point, and comes back up with his face covered in frosting.
  • Pungeon Master: Most of his disses are puns on titles or famous lines from his movies.
  • Sad Clown: Outwardly one of the most upbeat and good-natured characters in the series, but makes coded references to his own cocaine addiction and suicide.
  • Self-Deprecation: Like the other comics, he doesn't avoid mentioning his own low points, and references his cocaine addition and depression in his verses.
  • Shout-Out: His verses contain several references to his films.
  • Take That!:
    • His opening line is a blunt nod to the fact that despite his own fair share of movie bombs, he had a more consistently successful film career than what the other rappers can claim.
    • He makes a sarcastic compliment on Joan Rivers' shoulder pads, as she also liked to make fun of other people's sense of style.
    • His line "I love the Prince, but you'll never have a friend like me" is a shot at the live-action remake of Aladdin, where Will Smith a.k.a. "the Fresh Prince" was cast as the Genie.

     Jacques Cousteau vs. Steve Irwin 

Jacques Cousteau

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"Palme d'Or-winning documenter of the ocean!"

  • Berserk Button: He gets particularly snappy when Steve brings up even his flimsiest ties to Fascism.
  • Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys: Irwin encourages him to surrender during the battle, on account of his French nationality. It's an even sharper insult than it sounds, as Cousteau was honored for service to the French Resistance in WWII.
  • Cool Boat: His ship, the Calypso.
  • Dirty Old Man: Irwin mocks the fact that his mistress, whom he married right after his wife passed away, is as old as his eldest son.
  • Disappointing Older Sibling: He'd rather not talk about his older brother, Pierre. See Those Wacky Nazis.
    Irwin: Would you rather talk about your brother? Ooh boy.
  • Distinguished Gentleman's Pipe: He's seen smoking a Calabash pipe in one scene, and makes a point about how he is more respectable than a "desperate sweaty showman".
  • French Jerk: These rap battles tend to be anything goes affairs by default, but he can't resist taking a stab at making fun of Steve's cause of death, and his French accent is clearly apparent.
  • Hollywood Cuisine: Well, he's a Frenchman who talks about eating snails named after his opponent.
  • Old Shame: invoked Steve Irwin calls him out on the violence he and his crew met out towards several marine animals in his documentary film "The Silent World". The real-life Cousteau recognized his bad decisions and began a life of conservation afterwards.
  • Signature Headgear: He wears his signature red knit cap. Steve Irwin doesn't think it's so nice, however:
    Steve Irwin: He's cranky 'cause he has to wear a Papa Smurf hat!
  • Slobs Versus Snobs: The Snob, as a pipe-smoking ship captain, inventor, and award-winning documentarian.
  • Technician Versus Performer: He paints himself — a self-described "Palme d'Or-winning documenter of the ocean" who "invented SCUBA [and] captained the Calypso" — as the technician, contrasted from Steve Irwin, the "desperate, sweaty showman" performer.
  • Those Wacky Nazis: Steve Irwin blasts Cousteau's brother for supporting the Nazis. Said brother, Pierre-Antoine Cousteau, defected to Nazi Germany during WWII and became a pro-Fascist journalist afterwards. As noted above it's a bit of a sore subject.
  • You Are Fat: He mocks Steve Irwin’s weight during his first verse.
    You're chunky and soft, you get on my nerves!
    You're the only manatee I don't want to conserve!

Steve Irwin

Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"I'm Mother Nature's greatest conservationist!"

  • Acrofatic: Despite sporting a girth Jacques Cousteau can see from his side, Steve spends the whole battle crouching, hopping and even dancing in a way that would destroy the knees of most men his age.
  • Awesome Aussie: He’s a fearless wildlife expert who brings strong raps with a thick Australian accent (well, kind of).
  • Be Careful What You Wish For: At the end of his first verse, Steve tells his opponent to “embrace your French nature and quietly surrender”. Then at the end of his final verse, Cousteau attempts to do just that... only for Irwin to call him back because he wasn’t finished.
  • Boring Insult: He uses this against Cousteau, in one instance calling him a "subdued sub dude", and in another:
    And Crikey! You're such a boring guy,
    You could make a whole show about the ocean dry!
  • Catchphrase: He uses his signature "Crikey!" and "Danger-danger-danger!"
  • Dude, Not Funny!: His reaction to Cousteau mocking him for being killed by a stingray:
    Holy smokes, what a place to go!
    need a submarine for a blow that low!
  • Early-Bird Cameo: Revealed during literally the last second of George Carlin vs. Richard Pryor.
  • Exact Words: When Irwin tells Cousteau to “hang on a minute”, it is literally a minute before the end of the video.
  • Fluffy Tamer: He's shown feeding a crocodile during one of his verses, and handling a snake while Jacques Cousteau tells him to "go grope a nope rope".
  • Friend to All Living Things: Calls himself a "wildlife defender" and shames Jacques for his conduct while filming The Silent World. Cousteau, for his part, accuses Irwin of getting a little too friendly with the wildlife.
  • Harmful to Minors: Cousteau brings up the time Irwin brought his young son on a crocodile feeding, and his said son nearly became the croc’s dinner.
    Jacques Cousteau: Talk about sons? Better watch what you say now!
    You almost turned yours into Outback Mistake House!
  • Keet: Much like in real life, he's shown to be boundlessly energetic and jovial.
  • Land Down Under: Both he and his opponent make references to Australian stereotypes and pop culture, from didgeridoos to "Crocodile" Dundee.
  • Named After Someone Famous: Cousteau notes that a species of snail was named in honor of Irwin, then states that he'll turn it into escargot.
  • No Sense of Personal Space: Crosses over to Cousteau's side during his first verse and gets way too close to him, if Jacques' facial expression is any indication.
  • Ooh, Me Accent's Slipping: Lloyd's Australian accent often starts to sound more Bostonian at times.
  • Politically Incorrect Hero: Not in real life, but Steve taunts Cousteau by telling him to give in to his "French nature" and surrender.
  • Primal Stance: Being around all those animals must've rubbed off on him, because Steve spends most of the battle hunched over, knees bent, arms up, in what is clearly a "ready for anything" stance.
  • Slobs Versus Snobs: The Slob, as a "chunky" television host and self-proclaimed wild man who's not afraid to get his hands dirty tussling with the very animals he features on his show.
  • Undignified Death: Cousteau mocks Irwin's death from being stabbed in the heart by a stingray, as they are commonly kept as pets and found in aquarium touch tanks.
  • Waxing Lyrical: He briefly quotes the lyrics of "Down Under" by Men at Work.
    You'd better run! You'd better take cover!
  • What the Hell, Hero?: Steve starts his first verse by pointedly calling Cousteau out for taking a cheap shot at how he died.
  • Wildlife Commentary Spoof: Appropriately enough, seeing as Irwin is a popular source of inspiration for nature commentary parodies, he takes such an approach to Cousteau for part of his first verse, circling around and gesturing toward his opponent as he lists Cousteau's attributes while looking into the camera.
    Have a look at this salty fella!
    His face looks like it's made of pure leather!
    Look out! He's got the body of a naked mole-rat!
    He's cranky 'cause he has to wear a Papa Smurf hat!

     Mother Teresa vs Sigmund Freud 

Mother Teresa

Played by: Cara Francis
"Three stripes like Adidas, and I'm doing it for Jesus!"

  • All-Loving Hero: Mother Teresa's main claim to fame is dedicating her life to helping the poor and downtrodden. Freud, of course, makes some objections to the contrary.
  • Chaste Hero: As a nun, she of course took a vow of chastity. However, according to Freud, it's redundant since no one would want to sleep with her anyway.
  • Double Meaning: As Zach Sherwin explains in the behind the scenes video, when Teresa calls herself an "MC", it is both a reference to her organization, the Missionaries of Charity, and a reference to the fact that "MC" is a term for a rapper.
  • Good is Not Nice: "Got a Peace Prize, but I'm not friendly!"
  • Good Shepherd: Catholic nun providing "food, beds, medicine, and showers" to lepers in the name of her savior. Freud, of course, insists she's a con artist.
  • Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Due to being a nun, she's one of the few rappers who doesn't say any swear words in her rap battle. She says "motherlover" instead of "motherfucker" and "D" instead of "dick".
  • Heaven Above: Her background is a blue sky with clouds, which is fitting for a heavenly saint.
  • Holy Backlight: She's constantly emanating a holy glow, a reference to how she was venerated after death.
  • Holier Than Thou: She's a Catholic nun in a dissing contest with the guy who coined the Oedipus Complex. Of course she's gonna get up on her high horse. And of course, Freud mocks her for her beliefs:
    Freud: I help people live, you watch people die
    To get souls for a man in the sky.
  • Nuns Are Funny: This entire series is pretty silly to begin with, but the fact that it's Mother Teresa making masturbation jokes and referencing Run–D.M.C. adds another layer to the ridiculousness of it all.
  • Only in It for the Money: Freud accuses her of being motivated more by financial gain than true altruism.
    Freud: You were running Project: Pimp the Projects
    To you, Calcutta meant Cal-cut-a-check!
  • Our Ghosts Are Different: Her Holy Backlight implies that this rap battle takes place after her death and veneration.
  • Well-Intentioned Extremist: Freud says she had a nice idea, but went about it in a shady way.
  • Worst Aid: Freud accuses her of this.
    Freud: You had a nice message but your methods were detestable.
    I've seen better care given to organic vegetables!

Sigmund Freud

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"I help people live."

  • All Psychology Is Freudian: The Trope Maker; his theories about human sexuality and familial relationships are mentioned multiple times. Mother Teresa isn't impressed, of course, and openly accuses him of being a sex-crazed buffoon and a quack exploiting patients for money.
    Mother Teresa: Your legacy is people who are mad at their parents
    Complaining on the couch for two hundred bucks an hour!

    Mother Teresa: Everything is sex to you! After I'm through wrecking you,
    I'll have to go and do confession just for standing next to you
  • Belief Makes You Stupid: He questions Mother Teresa's sanity for her belief in holy miracles
    Freud: All these tokens and smoke and miracles!
    You really believe all this stuff? You're hysterical!
  • Bookends: He is seen checking his pocket watch at the start of the battle, and again right at the end. This, coupled with his last line, suggests that he simply sees the battle as one of his therapy sessions and he's timing the beginning and end of it, as further evidenced by his (and the battle's) last line:
    But our time is up, Teresa.
  • Don't Shoot the Message: In-Universe; Freud's main problem with Teresa was not her goals, but how she went about them.
    Freud: You had a nice message, but your methods were detestable!
  • Drugs Are Bad: Mother Teresa brings up Freud's cocaine problem.
  • Freudian Couch: Lays down on one of these at one point during his first verse when talking about his favorite subject, "Me!" Specifically, it's his mouth cancer problem.
  • Herr Doktor: Nice Peter speaks with a German accent when playing Freud; justified since the Austrian-born Freud was the Trope Codifier in real life.
  • Hollywood Atheist: He has a very dim view of organized religion, even asserting that Mother Teresa must be mentally ill for her belief in holy miracles.
    Freud: Thank imaginary God I wasn't in one of your beds
    You'd have just sprinkled magic water on my forehead.
  • Hypocritical Humor:
    • He mocks Teresa for talking a lot about herself, despite having earlier admitted to doing the same.
      • This is somewhat mitigated by the fact that Freud's true complaint wasn't her self-absorption. It was that he at least admitted his narcissism, while she "[hid] her true feelings like they were other people's money."
    • He also derides Teresa for giving people inadequate care because of her religious beliefs, ignoring that his own treatment methods were largely based on discredited pseudoscience.
  • It's All About Me: he openly admits as much:
    Freud: Let's turn to my favorite subject: me!
  • The Shrink: The "father of psychoanalysis", as Teresa puts it (before calling him an egghead).
  • Smoking Is Not Cool: He brings up how his cigar habit eventually gave him oral cancer.

     Vlad the Impaler vs Count Dracula 

Vlad the Impaler

Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"Vlad Dracula, Spawn of the Devil!"

  • Ass Shove: While lots of traditional art depicts the impalings in Kill It Through Its Stomach fashion, a few verses mention how this Vlad takes what we'll tastefully refer to as the "spitroast" approach.
    Count Dracula: The flex of a rear-spearing princeling can't vex me
    Vlad the Impaler: Turn your taint to a 'tis when I shove a stick through ya!
    Count Dracula: Here's a tidbit you can stick a stake up
  • Badass Normal: A normal human warlord who holds his own against Dracula and boasts about being able to spread more terror than the vampire ever could.
  • Bad People Abuse Animals: Brags about impaling rats during his time imprisoned in Hungary.
  • But for Me, It Was Tuesday: His Establishing Character Moment has him making a point to emphasize how mass murder is nothing more than a routine for him. He even references the trope namer.
    Imagine forests of corpses, dripping on a buffet
    You call that a nightmare? I call it a Tuesday.
  • Card-Carrying Villain: He's enormously proud of his reputation for brutality and describes himself as a spawn of the devil.
    I butcher men, women, and children like cows!
  • The Dreaded: Boasts about inspiring fear.
  • Enemy to All Living Things: He alludes to how he impaled rats and other small animals during his time in jail.
  • Eviler than Thou: Proudly boasts about being more evil than Dracula.
  • Evil Sounds Deep: He's got a disturbingly deep voice.
  • Evil Sounds Raspy: His voice is as snarly as it is deep.
  • General Ripper: He alludes to his brutal wartime conquests:
    Vlad the Impaler: Scorched the earth from Hungary to Wallachia!
    I inspire fear; you inspire Count Chocula
    Stepped to the Turks and the bodies started dropping!
    Put my foot on Ottomans like I was furniture shopping!
  • Humans Are the Real Monsters: He's an ordinary human with no powers, but he's far more terrifying than his vampire opponent.
  • I'm a Humanitarian: He mentions how he supposedly ate bread soaked in the blood of his victims.
  • Impaled with Extreme Prejudice: His favorite method of execution is impalement, and he even points out that his opponent is a creature known for being vulnerable to wooden stakes through the heart...
  • The Man in the Mirror Talks Back: When talking about Dracula's Missing Reflection, Vlad the Impaler is seen looking in a mirror, and his reflection moves and speaks independently of the genuine article.
  • Manly Facial Hair: A big impressive mustache, fitting for a man who acquitted himself quite well during his struggles against the Ottoman Empire.
  • Names to Run Away from Really Fast: Both his title "The Impaler", and his real surname, which he points out means "spawn of the devil" in Wallachian.
  • Pretender Diss: He accuses Dracula of stealing his name.
  • Red and Black and Evil All Over: His costume is mostly red and black, his background for the most part is black cobble and blood-red sky, and he's one of the viler characters ever depicted in ERB.
  • Slobs Versus Snobs: The Slob to Dracula's Snob. He boasts about his cruelty and the terror he invokes in people, and regards Dracula as a pathetic effeminate weakling.
    Haven't seen a sucker this soft since Bunnicula!
  • Too Spicy for Yog-Sothoth: Dracula claims to be made nauseous at the thought of biting his filthy neck.
  • Vile Villain, Saccharine Show: He has an occasional Laughably Evil moment, but his crimes are treated far more seriously and for grimdark horror than most ERB villains.
  • Would Hurt a Child: Claims that he butchers kids like livestock.
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: He's quick to assume that Dracula is vulnerable to direct sunlight, seemingly unaware that Dracula's original novel established him as a Daywalking Vampire.
  • You No Take Candle: Some of his lines are said this way.


Played by: Peter Shukoff
"I'm Universally known for intrigue and desire!"

  • Accent Adaptation: He speaks with Vampire Vords, despite being fluent in English in the original novel. Probably a mimic of Bela Lugosi's Hungarian accent.
  • Blah, Blah, Blah: "Does this mic still work after that 'blah, blah, blah'?"
  • Camp: This portrayal of Dracula heavily focuses on the comical and campy aspects of the character as opposed to the dramatic aspects, likely to provide a contrast from Vlad.
  • Classical Movie Vampire: Surprising, isn't it? Quoth the man himself:
    Slick hair, popped collar, and a damn nice cape!
  • Composite Character: Is a combination of his original novel, Bela Lugosi and Christopher Lee versions, with a verbal nod ("bone Winona Ryder") to the Gary Oldman version.
  • Daywalking Vampire: Contrary to what Vlad the Impaler says, Dracula can't be killed by direct sunlight.
    Dracula: You thought the sunlight could kill me? Not true!
  • I'm a Humanitarian: Drinks human blood but he's technically not a human, being a vampire and all. Our Vampires Are Different means either this trope could apply or To Serve Man.
  • Kryptonite Factor: Vlad the Impaler brings up common vampire weaknesses such as garlic, direct sunlight (which Dracula points out does not affect him), crucifixes (which the Impaler says he doesn't need), and impalement through the chest via wooden stake (and that last one just so happens to be Vlad's specialty.)
  • Laughably Evil: In contrast to the dead-serious Vlad, he's played for Camp and vampire-pop culture jokes for most of the battle.
  • Man of Wealth and Taste: "Slick hair, popped collar, and a damned nice cape."
  • Missing Reflection: Vlad the Impaler points out Dracula's lack of reflection in a mirror by comparing it to his skill in a rap battle.
  • Must Be Invited: "I rock the house, once I'm invited into it!"
  • Named After Somebody Famous: He and Vlad the Impaler share the same name, and the Impaler is implied to be pissed off that his name is more commonly associated with the vampire.
    Vlad the Impaler: You leeched my name, you pale son of a bitch!
  • No Such Thing as Bad Publicity: invoked Vlad claims that the Lighter and Softer vampires he inspired, like Count Chocula and Bunnicula have diluted his image to the point that he's no longer considered scary. Dracula doesn't seem to be bothered at all by being associated with such characters, and in his own verses, he proudly references his influence on Count von Count and Edward Cullen as well.
  • Our Vampires Are Different: Typical vampire tropes are commented on throughout the battle.
  • The Renfield: Renfield himself shows up as Dracula's Assist Character.
  • Shapeshifting: He mentions his ability to shapeshift into mist. He can also turn into a bat, as an unimpressed Impaler points out.
  • Speaks in Shout-Outs: The character's a Trope Codifier for a lot of vampire-related tropes, and both him and his opponent reference a ton of vampire-related media. On top of things mentioned in Composite Character above, he alludes to Count von Count, and namedrops Nosferatu, Team Jacob and Anne Rice. To diss him, the Impaler points out the Lighter and Softer vampires: Count Chocula and Bunnicula. The outro of the battle also includes a reference to Castlevania.
  • Slobs Versus Snobs: The Snob to Vlad's Slob. He emphasizes his subtle, sexy method of killing and elegant looks and manner against Vlad's penchant for grotesque, overtly brutal violence.
    Slick hair, popped collar, and a damn nice cape,
    While you've got less taste than an Anne Rice cake!
  • Vampires Are Sex Gods: He proudly proclaims he "nibble[s] necks and make[s] it look sexy".
  • Vampires Hate Garlic: Vlad the Impaler jokes that Dracula could be killed by the garlic breadsticks at Olive Garden.
  • Vampire Vords: Like most depictions of Dracula, he's got a thick Eastern-European accent.
  • Weakened by the Light: Defied; he points out that, in his debut novel, sunlight was not deadly to him as Vlad the Impaler initially assumes.
  • Weaksauce Weakness: Vlad is unimpressed with the weaknesses pop culture ascribes to Dracula.
    I kill you with Olive Garden garlic breadsticks!
    Your weak ass gets beat by the sun at the beach!

     The Joker vs Pennywise 

The Joker

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"I'm the Harlequin of Hate, the Clown Prince of Crime!"

  • Actor Allusion: Nearly every actor to play the Joker in a major production is mentioned in some way, shape or form.
  • Ascended Meme: One of his lines is "We live in a society." Humorously it's used in the context of Joker's occasional Even Evil Has Standards moments to make it clear that he thinks it's one of the better parts of society rather than the meme's usual context of "society sucks".
  • Badass Boast: Claims that he made the Justice League look weak, likely in reference to how he manipulated them in Batman: Endgame.
    I make the Justice League look like just a bunch of super-schlubs!
  • Berserk Button: He loses it when Pennywise threatens to eat Batman, so much so that the green comic book background briefly cuts to black as plumes of red smoke rise up from behind him.
  • Boring Insult: The Joker accuses Pennywise's films — and by proxy the creature itself — of just taking too damned long, even looking at his watch for emphasis.
    I've seen your movies, so I know you don't hurry.
  • Card-Carrying Villain: He embraces his violent insanity and brags about his numerous atrocities.
  • Crowbar Combatant: He's seen wielding a crowbar in the background of one scene, in reference to how he killed Jason Todd.
  • Did You Just Flip Off Cthulhu?: Due to the Joker's opponent being an Eldritch Abomination, his whole rap comes across as this. At one point, he even threatens to take it a step further when Pennywise presses his Berserk Button.
    • He even finds time to throw a jab at another Eldritch Abomination, IT's nemesis Maturin, for being a turtle but not a ninja one.
  • Domestic Abuser: Pennywise brings up Joker's abuse of Harley Quinn, threatening to beat the Clown Prince just as badly.
  • Don't Explain the Joke: Joker's initial manic energy deflates somewhat when Pennywise doesn't get a rather blatant cocaine joke, forcing him to do one of his least favorite things and explain the joke. In retaliation he takes a crack at ITs Forehead of Doom.
    You're a sewer troll that Stephen King wrote between his lines!
    (Ha-ha-ha-ha!) It's like cocaine. You know what I said.
    I don't know how any kind of joke could ever go over
    that head!
  • Even Evil Has Standards: Joker may be a sadistic Card-Carrying Villain that has no problem killing kids (seen by he gleefully mentions beating Jason Todd), but he does not approve anything to that sexualizes kids and is genuinely disgusted by the infamous child orgy scene from IT.
    Tell your author for his next gang-bang scene,
    How 'bout a little more PG, and a
    lot less 13?
    Even I wouldn't stoop to that kind of impropriety
    This is Earth, you space demon! WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY!
  • Eviler than Thou: Claims to be more evil than Pennywise:
    When I compare your antics to the fiendish schemes I revel in,
    They pale like the moonlight you can dance with the devil in.
  • Fashion-Victim Villain: Invoked; Pennywise mocks Joker's purple suit, saying that it makes him look like Steve Harvey. He also pokes fun at the Jared Leto portrayal's fashion sense as well as the Cesar Romero version's painted-over mustache.
  • Glasgow Grin: Alluded to when he boasts, "I take smiles and I leave scars!"
  • Hypocritical Humor: Makes fun of Pennywise for losing "to a herd of nerds who call themselves the Losers' Club." Pennywise later points out the Joker once lost to the Scooby Gang.
  • Insanity Immunity: Pennywise exposes the Joker to his Deadlights, which drive normal people to madness just by proximity. Joker shows no signs of being affected, most likely because he's already insane, and he then proceeds to mock the Deadlights as "three nightlights in a cloud".
  • Joker Immunity: Joker begins the battle boasting about his trope-naming history of cheating death.
    In my first appearance, the Bat was supposed to slay me,
    But I can't be killed—that's why they cast a Phoenix to play me!
  • Large Ham: Lampshaded when he boasts about "Going Mark Ham".
  • Monster Clown: They don't call him the Clown Prince of Crime for nothing.
  • Mythology Gag: References his murder of Jason Todd, emulates his pose on the cover of The Killing Joke, alludes to fighting ninja turtles and Pennywise brings up him losing to the cast of Scooby-Doo (which happened more than once, amusingly enough).
    Ask Robin if I drop bars!
  • No Celebrities Were Harmed: His voice sounds an awful lot like Mark Hamill's version of the Joker.
  • No-Sell: Isn't remotely fazed by Pennywise's horrific shapeshifting. Even the Deadlights — direct exposure to which makes ordinary people go insane or die of fright — does absolutely nothing to the Joker at all.
  • The Only One Allowed to Defeat You: He flips out when Pennywise threatens to eat Batman.
    Don't you lay a finger on my Bat, you little freak!
    Or I will spend a whole week knocking out those prickle teeth!
  • Playing Card Motifs: As usual, he has playing cards as a subtle gimmick, even tossing a deck of cards away during his first verse. Pennywise, of course, flips this into a diss.
    Pennywise: This battle's like poker — the joker is useless!
  • Rage Against the Author: Joker's not above mocking his own creators.
    I steal the show like Bob Kane stole from Bill Finger!
  • Red Baron: He refers to his nicknames "Harlequin of Hate" and "Clown Prince of Crime".
  • Sad Clown: Pennywise claims that, despite being a clown, the Joker isn't that funny.
    Pennywise: Oh, why so serious? You're supposed to be the man who laughs
    But those jokes are like your new movie: mostly really sad.
  • Saying Sound Effects Out Loud: "Oh, and as far as Mr. King goes, I'm a Shining man — wink!"
  • Secondary Color Nemesis: Both Joker's costume and backgrounds contain a ton of green and purple.
  • Toilet Humor: Joker can't resist the low-hanging fruit that comes with Pennywise living in a sewer.
    You're renowned as the "if it's brown, flush it down" clown!
  • Visual Pun: He holds up a Declarative Finger while talking about Bill Finger.
  • Would Hurt a Child: He may be disgusted by media that sexualizes children but he gleefully brings up how he killed Jason Todd in A Death in the Family.
  • WTH, Casting Agency?: In-Universe, Pennywise claims that the Joker is almost always miscast.
    Pennywise: Jack Nicholson played you just fine, but lately the casting's declined
    Jared Leto came out trying to look like he was Tekashi 6ix9ine!

Pennywise the Dancing Clown

Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"I'm the Derry, Maine attraction every 27 years!"

     Thanos vs J. Robert Oppenheimer 


Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist
"I crush tracks like tesseracts in my palm."

  • Adaptational Jerkass: In Avengers: Infinity War, he is shown to be remorseful about having to sacrifice his adopted daughter, Gamora, in order to obtain the Soul Stone. In this battle, however, he gleefully boasts about it. This is more or less consistent with his comic book persona, who can be quite the prick.
  • All Love Is Unrequited: Oppenheimer mocks the fact that everything he did was to gain the affection of Mistress Death, but she rejected his advances.
    Oppenheimer: You want to talk about Death? How about the one that looked at you and swiped left?
  • Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: He brags about defeating the Avengers, killing half of humanity, wielding the Infinity Gauntlet that lets him control all of reality, being part of the most financially successful movie of all time, and... appearing in Fortnite.
  • Badass Boast: His claim to infamy is decimating the Avengers and killing half of all life in the universe, all with one finger snap.
    "I burned the Avengers down to embers, sent half your planet to be slaughtered."
  • "Balls" Gag: Makes one by claiming that Oppenheimer doesn't have "the stones" to overcome him.
  • Card-Carrying Villain: He describes himself as "monstrous" in his very first line.
  • The Comically Serious: An extraterrestrial conqueror of worlds who's got the power and the stature to match...and is also inordinately proud of his personal helicopter and his appearance in Fortnite.
  • Composite Character: Many lines in his battle reference his MCU appearances, but elements from the comics (such as his Eternal backstory, infatuation with Mistress Death, and the Thanoscopter) are also brought up.
  • Cool Plane: Has one in the form of the Thanoscopter, which as he points out, has his name prominently displayed on it.
  • Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: Oppenheimer brings up an instance of when Thanos was on the receiving end of this trope, when the latter was defeated by Squirrel Girl, who is frequently perceived as a Joke Character.
  • Draco in Leather Pants: Invoked and defied. Oppenheimer is flatly dismissive of claims and memes from Thanos' fans that sympathize with him and downplay his atrocities.
    Oppenheimer: Anyone who believes that "Thanos did nothing wrong" crap
    Has obviously never heard you rap! Oh snap!
  • Early-Bird Cameo: Revealed in a Freeze-Frame Bonus at the very end of "Joker vs Pennywise."
  • Glowing Gem: The Infinity Gems on his Infinity Gauntlet are constantly glowing.
  • Gonk: Oppenheimer mocks Thanos' bizarre appearance.
    Oppenheimer: You need an iron, man, for that wrinkly-ass skin
    And that butt-butt-butt-butt-butt-butt-chin!
  • Iconic Item: The Infinity Gauntlet with the Infinity Gems inserted is this for him. In fact, the gauntlet is so ubiquitous as visual shorthand for Thanos that in promotional images for the battle, it is used to represent him, rather than his face, as would usually be the case.
  • Just for the Heli of It: He brings up his infamous Thanos Copter from the comics, and is even see flying it in the background.
  • Ignored Enamored Underling: He is this to Mistress Death, as all of his atrocities were done to gain her affection, to which she still scorned him. Oppenheimer wastes no time in mocking him for this.
  • Large Ham: Delivers his lines loudly and bombastically.
  • No-Neck Chump: Between the bulky body armor and oddly-proportioned mask, this version of Thanos lacks a visible neck, and he is definitely brutish here.
  • Offing the Offspring: He brings up how he killed his adopted daughter, Gamora, to acquire the Soul Stone. Oppenheimer also comments on how his own mother tried to kill him when he was born because of his hideous appearance.
    Thanos: Now I'm offing Oppenheimer like I did to my daughter!
    Oppenheimer: You were born to Eternals, but came out looking so scary
    That your own mother tried to make you a temporary.
  • Omnicidal Maniac: His most famous feat is eliminating half of the universe, and so he brags about it here.
  • Power Crystal: The Infinity Gems on his Infinity Gauntlet are six such crystals that give their holder the power to manipulate all of existence. They are proudly on display and shining in his first verse.
  • Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: Thanos' tendency for dramatic pauses in his dialogue (which isn't really conspicuous in the rap battle) is brought up as an insult by Oppenheimer.
    Oppenheimer: Your dialogue's got too many breaks in the syllables
    You talk so slow, Drax thinks you're invisible!
  • Puny Earthlings: He looks down on Oppenheimer for being a "terran" that breaks and bleeds easily.
  • Purple Is Powerful: Both his background and his skin is purple, and he's an Eternal and wielder of the Infinity Stones. Doesn't stop Oppenheimer from calling him "Tinky Winky," though.
  • Red Oni, Blue Oni: The Red Oni to Oppenheimer's Blue Oni, as he delivers his lines in a loud, bombastic voice in contrast to Oppenheimer's cool, even tone. Ironically, his background is mostly purple, compared to Oppenheimer's firey orange.
  • Terms of Endangerment: While boasting of his superior power, Thanos sarcastically calls his opponent "Oppie" — which, in real life, was an Affectionate Nickname given to Oppenheimer by his students.
  • Tricked-Out Gloves: The Infinity Gauntlet naturally counts as this, and Thanos makes reference to it and the Infinity Stones it was meant to hold.
  • The Voice: For a brief period between the audio release and the video release, on account of the thumbnail not showing his face, focusing on the Infinity Gauntlet instead.

J. Robert Oppenheimer

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"I cause chain reactions when I'm lyrical."

  • Badass Boast: Claimed to have discerned the inner workings of the atom better than anyone before or since.
    "I've mastered the atom more than any man alive."
  • Badass Bookworm: He's a famous nuclear physicist who boasts about mastering the atom and makes physics cracks in his lines.
  • Badass Normal: You have to have some serious stones if you're a middle-aged nuclear physicist with throat cancer talking shit to an alien demigod. It's the most evident when the two are shown side by side, with Thanos towering over Oppenheimer, and the latter being completely unfazed by it.
  • Badass Fingersnap: He ends the battle with a simple snap of the fingers as a wall of fire overtakes him, evoking the effect of a Mic Drop.
  • "Balls" Gag: Oppenheimer brings up Squirrel Girl defeating Thanos once, and remarks that Thanos had his "nuts" handed to him by her.
  • The Casanova: Thanos taunts him by saying the only thing he knows how to wreck is a home. This trait ruined a good few of his friendships because he couldn't stop sleeping with married women.
  • Cold Ham: He rarely raises his voice above an awestruck monotone, but he carries a strong presence with his verbose rhymes, exaggerated facial expressions, and the fact that he overall seems to carry himself with an enormous sense of both accomplishment and horror at his actions.
  • Did You Just Flip Off Cthulhu?: The fact that Thanos is an alien demigod warlord doesn't faze him, and it certainly doesn't stop him from laying it thick.
  • Distinguished Gentleman's Pipe: He's seen smoking a pipe, which goes well with his image as a refined intellectual but also gave him throat cancer. note 
  • Dirty Communists: As Thanos points out, he had pro-Communist sympathies, and was ostracized for it.
  • Early-Bird Cameo: Revealed in a Freeze-Frame Bonus at the very end of "Joker vs Pennywise."
  • Eye Recall: At one point in the battle, the characteristic mushroom cloud of a nuclear explosion is seen in a close-up of his eyes, hinting that the devastation caused by the atomic bomb is weighing on his mind at the time.
  • Good is Not Nice: He's one of the more heroic rappers, especially when up against Thanos, but was something of a homewrecker and his research contributed to the most destructive weapon in history. This is something he deeply regrets even as he acknowledges he didn't really have other options.
  • Handicapped Badass: He famously suffered from throat cancer due to his chronic smoking, and can be heard heaving during his lines, but he doesn't let that stop him from dissing the likes of Thanos.
  • Historical Villain Upgrade: A minor example, but the real Oppenheimer called himself the "destroyer of worlds" as a form of resigned self-admission concerning the immense destruction the atomic bomb would cause if used against an enemy nation. In this battle, he uses the title as a boast. His body language, on the other hand, is very much that of someone who regrets everything to do with the Manhattan Project.
  • I Did What I Had to Do: He uses this reasoning with regards to his involvement in creating the atomic bomb.
    ''I'm a peaceful man, but I do what I must."
  • Kubrick Stare: His Thousand-Yard Stare turns into this a couple times when he tilts his head downwards.
  • Malicious Misnaming: Derisively refers to Thanos as "Tinky Winky" in his second verse, on account of Thanos' purple skin.
  • Mental Picture Projector: Stock footage of the Trinity atomic test, an event that Oppenheimer directly witnessed, plays in the background during his verses. This, coupled with an instance of Eye Recall showing a nuclear explosion and his Thousand-Yard Stare regarding the impact of the destruction caused by the atomic bomb, suggests that these images are what Oppenheimer is thinking of while delivering his lines.
  • Motor Mouth: Goes through the majority of his first verse at an impressive speed. However, it leaves him out of breath at the end, not helped by his health issues.
  • My God, What Have I Done?: He is famously known to have felt great remorse for his creating the atomic bomb, which Thanos comments upon twice.
    Thanos: With bars weighing on you harder than your haunting guilty conscience!
    Thanos: You're a pencil-pushing Terran who never learned to love his bomb!
  • Non-Action Guy: He's a scientist, not a soldier, and Thanos mocks him for being a "pencil-pushing Terran."
  • Radio Voice: His voice is given this effect, mimicking how the real Oppenheimer sounds on most footage and recordings.
  • Red Oni, Blue Oni: The Blue Oni to Thanos' Red Oni, as he speaks slowly and calmly, in contrast to Thanos being loud and bombastic.
  • Serial Homewrecker: Thanos brings up how he propositioned his friend Linus Pauling's wife, slept with his friend Richard Tolman's wife, and also impregnated Kitty Puening, who was married to someone else at the time.
    Thanos: You slept with your friend's wife,
    right there in your friend's bed,
    then got another married girl pregnant.
    You should have gone for the head.
  • Sharp-Dressed Man: Wears a suit to the rap battle.
  • Smoking Is Not Cool: Thanos points out how Oppenheimer's smoking-induced throat cancer ultimately killed him. Oppenheimer is also heard hissing and heaving throughout his lines, ostensibly because he was smoking or due to said cancer.
  • Suckiness Is Painful: He jokes that Thanos' bad rapping made him go deaf, at the same time referencing his famous recitation from the Bhagavad Gita after the Trinity testnote 
    Listening to you took everything I have left
    After your raps, I am become deaf
  • Teeny Weenie: Thanos accuses him of having this.
    Thanos: Stick your tiny nuclear dick back in your pants, Doctor Manhattan.
  • "The Reason You Suck" Speech: A few commenters have pointed out that while Oppenheimer has a couple of lines about himself and his accomplishments, claiming that he "mastered the atom more than any man alive" and calling himself "the destroyer of worlds" as a Badass Boast, easily 90% or more of his rap consists of dismantling Thanos rather than hyping himself up, implying that he would really rather not dwell on the catastrophic results of his own actions more than strictly necessary.
  • Thousand-Yard Stare: He has a wide-eyed stare on his face for much of the battle, reflecting the enormity of his achievements and the heavy toll they've exacted on his conscience. He also turns it into a Kubrick Stare at a few points in the battle by simply angling his head downward.
  • Tranquil Fury: He never raises his voice, no matter how furiously he's calling Thanos out.
  • The Unblinking: He never blinks at any point in the battle, which underscores his Thousand-Yard Stare.
  • Vader Breath: Has trouble breathing at the end of his verse, most likely due to his smoking-induced throat cancer. Combined with the relatively stoic delivery, it manages to make him sound unsettling.
  • Woobie, Destroyer of Worlds: He created the atomic bomb, but was noted to have felt great remorse over the destruction that it caused, and stated that it came as a result of I Did What I Had to Do.

     Donald Trump vs. Joe Biden 

Donald Trump

Played by: Lloyd Ahlquist

See main page

Joe Biden

Played by: Peter Shukoff
"I'm just an old-ass man with some decency."

  • Attack! Attack! Attack!: Biden's entire rap stands out among others because of this. There is a very prevalent lack of Badass Boast. Instead, from the very beginning, Biden targeted every single flaw of Trump in absolutely vicious manner. The closest he comes to talking about himself is a line were he calls himself 'old ass man with some decency' and stating that he is on good terms with the Police, the later of which could also be seen as a diss towards Trump and threat to prosecute him. Other then that all of his lines are an attack with no rest in between.
  • Berserk Button: Biden's real-life berserk button of disrespecting the military comes up when he calls out Trump for insulting veterans and fallen soldiers, combined with his fury at Trump for mishandling a global pandemic that has killed hundreds of thousands of people.
    Biden: "200,000 deaths lying at your door, and you think they're suckers like McCain and the Marine Corps!"
  • Big "SHUT UP!": He ends his final verse with his famous "Will you shut up, man?"
  • Borrowed Catchphrase: "I ain't sleepy, I'm tired — of you, Donald Trump! YOU'RE FIRED!"
  • Catchphrase: Biden uses his signature "malarkey" when asking what the hell is going on when Russian hackers interrupt the rap battle.
  • Cold Ham: He has his moments of being dramatically passionate but mainly keeps a tranquil facade when battling against Trump.
  • Cool Old Guy: Claims to be one.
    Biden: "I'm not a communist, I'm not a socialist, I'm just an old-ass man with some decency!"
  • Cool Shades: Wears sunglasses at several points in the battle, much like the real Biden. Trump mocks them, saying they make him look like the protagonist of Knight Rider.
  • Creepy Good: His behaviour can verge on threatening, either intentionally or unintentionally.
  • Dirty Old Man: Donald Trump mocks Biden's handsiness as a sign of perversion.
    Donald Trump: I'm not a little girl's shoulders, so you can't touch this, MC Stammer!
  • Eternally Pearly-White Teeth: Biden's blindingly white chompers are mocked by Trump and made visually prominent, including on the battle's cover image.
    Donald Trump: The only "white privilege" I see are those teeth!
  • False Dichotomy: Trump throws several at him, leading Biden to shoot back that you don't have to be anti-law or anti-capitalist to favor things like proper oversight for police and progressive taxation.
    Biden: "I don't wanna defund no police
    I picked a DA for my VP
    I'm not a communist, not a socialist
    I'm just an old-ass man with some decency!"
  • Glasses Pull: He dramatically whips off his Cool Shades twice, once when denying being a communist and once at the end.
  • Humble Hero: Presents himself as one. The vast majority of his rap is spent digging into Trump, and the closest he comes to a Badass Boast is calling himself "an old-ass man with some decency".
  • No Sense of Personal Space: Biden's tendency to get handsy with supporters is used by Donald Trump as an accusation that he's a Dirty Old Man.
  • Outliving One's Offspring: Trump makes crude jokes about Biden's lost children.
  • Overshadowed by Awesome: Trump claims that Biden will be forever stuck in Obama's shadow.
  • Patriotic Fervor: He takes particular offense when Trump claims he's anti-America, leading him to accuse Trump of being a traitor in league with Russia.
  • Pretender Diss: One of Biden's many grievances against Trump is how phony he is.
    Joe Biden: You're a wrestling heel! Nothing 'bout you is real!
    Bitch, you didn't even really write The Art of the Deal!
  • "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Gives an on-point one toward Trump throughout his verses, clearly used by the creators as an expression of their sincere opinions on several points. His second verse is noteworthy:
    Donald Trump: It's like I tell criminals, Joe: stop running!
    Joe Biden: Was Breonna Taylor running, you dog-whistling fool?
    Your Daddy would finally be proud of ya: He was a racist asshole, too!

    Keep at it and you'll wind up in jail, Hoss
    I'm taking you down like I'm you and you're a mailbox
    From all your wives to the SATs
    Everything you ever did, you just had to cheat
    Because you're too insecure to even look like a loser
    You're the worst damned Republican since Herbert Hoover
    You scooped up a sycophantic, homophobe Hoosier
    And became the Constitution's domestic abuser
    200 thousand deaths lying at your door
    And you think they're suckers like McCain and the Marine Corps
    I can't tell for which side you're rooting
    When we go high, you go down on Putin
    Truth is, you're scared to lose
    Got nothing in the bank but IOUs
    Y-y-you whine about ballots like a bitch
    But the only thing that's rigged is taxes for the rich
    You're a freeloader; change your name to Tramp
    My campaign's ramping up; You can't get down a ramp
    I'm pulling away faster than your wife's hand
    For the love of democracy, will you shut up, man?
  • Relative Button: Trump pushes Biden's relative button early and often, first by mocking the fact that Biden's daughter and first wife died in a car crash, then later mocking Biden's son Hunter for hooking up with the widow of Biden's other son Beau.
  • Tranquil Fury: Three moments of this: the first in response to Trump bringing up the death of his first wife and son as a buildup to bringing up Trump's ties to Jeffrey Epstein, a second in response to Trump defending police brutality, and a third and final time when he brings up the hundreds of thousands of deaths due to Trump's disasterous handling of the COVID-19 pandemic.

     Luke Skywalker vs. Harry Potter 

Luke Skywalker

Voiced by: Peter Shukoff (visually represented as a Lego figure)
"I'm a rhyming Jedi like my father before me!"

  • An Arm and a Leg: Harry mocks how Luke lost his hand in his fight against Vader:
    Harry Potter: But I bet you're just distracted; you've got a lot on your plate
    On one hand the rebellion, on the other hand - Oh, Wait!!
  • Assist Character: Yoda, Han Solo, and R2-D2 show up to help complete some of Luke's rhymes.
  • Back for the Dead: Harry claims that "The sequels brought you back to meet your demise."
  • Broken Base: invoked In-Universe, Harry says he will split Luke like how his fanbase’s feelings about the prequels were.
  • Brother–Sister Incest: Of course Harry wasn't going to let him live down that he kissed Leia before learning she was his sister.
    Harry Potter: At least when I Slytherin a sister, she isn't mine!
  • Butt-Monkey: Dies in every single one of Harry's verses.
  • Call-Back: His line "I'm a rhyming Jedi like my father before me", may be a reference to the fact that his father, Darth Vader, battled against Hitler 3 different times on ERB.
  • Character Derailment: invoked Harry takes a jab at Luke's unpopular characterization during the sequel trilogy.
    Harry Potter: You let J.J. compact your character to trash!
  • Chekhov's Gunman: Was mentioned during the second Hitler vs. Darth Vader battle back in Season 2.
  • Farm Boy: Harry uses Luke's rural upbringing as a diss.
    Harry Potter: You country bumpkin, you must be dumb
    Who farms moisture on a desert planet with two suns?
  • Formerly Fit: Harry blasts Luke for being out of shape by the time of his death.
  • If I Wanted X, I Would Y: "If I wanted teenage wizardry, I'd call Selena Gomez!"
  • Intelligible Unintelligible: He starts his second verse in a back-and-forth with R2-D2, whom only he understands. Based on his reactions, however, R2-D2 was saying Harry "left all his fire in the goblet" and suggesting that Dobby should come in to rescue him.
  • Like Father, Like Son: Says that he is a rhyming Jedi like his father, Darth Vader, before him.
  • Major Injury Underreaction: He's turned into a Force ghost by Harry with a spell that was a One-Hit Kill, crushed in the Death Star trash compactor by J. J. Abrams and his Endor speeder is crashed by the Weasley twins. He's unfazed by it and immediately recovers.
  • Sequelitis: In-Universe, Harry claims that the first two movies in his franchise are the only decent ones.
  • Speak Ill of the Dead: Mocks Harry with his mother Lily's and godfather Sirius' respective heroic sacrifices. He also calls Dobby (who died in Harry's sixth film) anorexic.
  • Strange-Syntax Speaker: He claims to have learned flow from Yoda and demonstrates it by momentarily using his same word order pattern:
    So of you the end this is!
  • Student–Master Team: Yoda serves as his final Assist Character.
  • They Wasted a Perfectly Good Character: In-Universe, Harry claims that he's a waste of a character, being the franchise's biggest letdown since Snoke.
  • Vocal Evolution: He starts out as the young Farm Boy from A New Hope with a cracking voice. As he grows older and matures into the Jedi Knight of Return of the Jedi, his voice stops cracking.

Harry Potter

Voiced by: Boyinaband (visually represented as a Lego figure)
"I'm the boy who lived — best seller without equal!"

  • Assist Character: The Weasley siblings show up to help him in the third verse.
  • Born Lucky: According to Luke, Harry is only alive because of luck.
  • Cannot Tell a Lie: He brings up the incident with the Blood Quill to explain why he can't say anything nice about Luke.
    I'd say you were brilliant, but I must not tell lies.
  • Cash-Cow Franchise: In-Universe, he brags about how profitable his franchise turned out to be.
    I left J.K. straight Rowling in cash!
  • Fake Ultimate Hero: Luke accuses Harry of this a few times, saying he would be dead if not for his mother and a lot of help from Hermione. In Luke's verses he also says what little Harry did do is peanuts compared to saving a galaxy
  • Follow the Leader: In-Universe, Luke accuses Harry's life story of being a knockoff of Luke's own.
    Luke Skywalker: Your origin story is mostly stolen from me
    You might be Potter, but Harry, I planted your seed
    Let's see: little orphan raised by relatives in solitude
    Suddenly gets taken under wing of funky wizard dude
    Learns that he's been destined to have powerful gifts,
    But between the two of us I think I got the cooler stick
  • The Hero's Journey: When Luke accuses Harry’s backstory of being stolen from him (see above), he ends up telling what the hero’s journey structure is pretty accurately.
  • Hypercompetent Sidekick: Luke doesn't pass up a chance to mock Harry for how useless he would be without Hermione.
  • Hypocritical Humor: He brags about how much money his franchise has made and how disappointing the 2010s continuations of Star Wars were, ignoring that A. Star Wars as a franchise has grossed far more than Wizarding World, and B. the Fantastic Beasts movies, his own franchise's 2010s revival, did worse in both critical and financial reception compared to the Star Wars movies and shows they were competing against.
    • He insults Luke's intelligence repeatedly, including calling him dumb for farming moisture on a desert planet with two suns, failing to realize the fact it is a desert planet with two suns is exactly why you'd farm moisture there - Water would be incredibly valuable.
    • Harry calls Luke a "swamp school dropout," when he himself skipped his seventh year of Hogwarts to search for Voldemort's horcruxes. This technically makes him a school dropout as well.
  • Not Helping Your Case: Harry responds to Luke's mockery that he always needs someone to bail him out by... calling in the Weasleys to bail him out.
  • Old Shame: Invoked as Harry focuses on mocking everything regrettable about the Star Wars Franchise. Contrast with Luke, who keeps pointing out that he saved the galaxy, whereas Harry just saved the wizarding world.
  • Pungeon Master: His rhymes focus heavily on wordplay from both franchises, saying Luke's lines "are 2D too" and making jokes about him trying to "Slytherin" his own sister.
  • Relative Button: Luke closes his first verse by mocking Harry for "using his mom like a bulletproof vest". Harry does not take this lying down, immediately flipping the script on Luke:
    The death of my mother saved the wizarding race.
    Your mum died of heartache when she saw your face!
  • Speak Ill of the Dead: Makes fun of Luke for being Formerly Fit by the time of his death.