Beware unmarked spoilers from anything beyond the most recent ten episodes!
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Main Characters
Player Characters
The Sons
The sons of the Dads, whose disappearance in the Forgotten Realms drives the main plot of season 1. They return as the fathers of the season 2 main cast.Listed in order of their major arcs.
Lark and Sparrow Oak
Lark and Sparrow Oak
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
The identical twins of Henry Oak.
- Always Identical Twins: Sometimes the dads lump them together as one kid.
- Comedic Sociopathy: First seen punching and tearing up a tree, punching each other, and punching their dad. They throw the dads in the dungeon in Neverwinter after knocking three of them out.
- Character Development: After some choice words, Sparrow becomes more open and loving. This even starts to make the twins distinct from each other.
- Crazy Survivalist: Season 2 reveals that Lark turned into something of this nature in adulthood. One of his first actions is to casually offer his nephew a gun to take on his first day of school, and it's later mentioned that he does wilderness survival training.
- Enfante Terrible
Will: I'm so glad someone else has to deal with these f—-ing kids.
- Extreme Doormat: Sparrow becomes this to Lark as the latter becomes angrier and more unhinged well into adulthood.
- Mike Nelson, Destroyer of Worlds: Lark and Sparrow become the Lord of Chaos after arriving in Neverwinter and are about to start killing people until they "spill the blood of The Unsung Hero," thereby summoning the Doodler. At the end of season one, Lark successfully does this by stabbing Henry.
- Hates Their Parent: Lark unfairly blames Henry for Walter's injury.
- Identical Twin Mistake: Happens to most of the Dads, even Henry. The twins take advantage of this to pull a Fake Twin Gambit on several notable occasions.
- Power Fist: Hulk Hands
- Pyromaniac: One of them caused fire damage that was limited to one or two classrooms. He said he'll do better next time.
- Theme Twin Naming: Named after birds.
- Trickster Twins: Lark and Sparrow are identical twins, and they're almost always fighting and causing trouble.
- True Companions: With each other.
- Why Couldn't You Be Different?: Both twins to Normal in early season 2.
Nick Close/ Nicholas Foster
Nick Close
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
The stoner son of Glenn Close.
- Bandit Clan: Joins one when entering the Forgotten Realms
- Human-Demon Hybrid: Is revealed to be this as a result of his altered parentage in episode 58.
- Generation Xerox: The son who is most like his father.
- Ignored Aesop: "I've learned nothing!"
- In-Series Nickname: Narco-las when his reality has been altered and he was raised by Jodie Foster.
- Like Father, Like Son: The son most like his father in the series.
- Meaningful Rename: Twice in the series. First, becomes Nicholas Foster when Glenn has his fatherhood magically taken away. Second, is referred to as Nick Foster after his
- The Stoner: Introduced smoking a joint in front of his dad.
Terry Jr.
Terry Jr.
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
The step-son of Ron Stampler.
- Character Development: He changes from being outright hostile to Ron and the fathers to accepting his father's true death and calling Ron "Dad."
- He initiates a hug with Ron when Ron is about to leave.
- Dead Guy Junior: Named after his late father, Terry Sr.
- You're Not My Father: Has a really hard time accepting his step dad Ron.
Grant Wilson
Grant Wilson
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
The son of Darryl Wilson.
- All Love Is Unrequited: Yeet doesn't see him the same way.
- A Real Man Is a Killer: When the dads find out that one way to get Grant out of the blood pact is if he were to become a totally different person, they come up with the plan to have him kill someone and subsequently become "a man".
- Innocence Lost: Loses his innocence and seems to become a lot more jaded after the For Knights-tournament.
- Straight Gay: Interested in Yeet Bigly.
- These Hands Have Killed: Grant comes out significantly changed after killing the Chimera.
Supporting Cast
Residents of the Forgotten Realms
Paeden
Paeden
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
An orphan who has been a fighter in orphan cage fights for years, Paeden was picked up by the Dads when they entered the bar he was in.
- Breakout Character: A random NPC who would be loved by the daddies and audience alike.
- Combat Pragmatist: Despite his lack of skill, he's still managed to stab someone in the eye to incapacitate them.
- Cut Himself Shaving: Comes up with some terrible excuses when trying to convince Glenn that he didn't hit himself after losing his "fight" with Ron.
- Dark and Troubled Past: Just the fact that evidently he's been in the orphan fighting ring for quite a long time and being exposed horrifying levels of violence from a young age, with no family to call his own. Also later reveals that his father is actually still alive and somewhere in the forgotten realms,which begs the question of what exactly happened to cause him to leave Paeden.
- Dreaded Kids' Table: Paeden is always frustrated when being left out of dad huddles after learning that he is actually Darryl's father Frank, but without his memories.
- Foster Kid: Abandoned by his father and made to fight as one of the Unfortunate Foster Children and later put up for adoption by the dads after they defeat Terry Sr.
- Hates Their Parent: While his hatred might not be as vehement as other examples, his motivation for travelling with the Dads comes from wanting to confront his father for abandoning him at the UFC.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: How he loses after challenging Ron to a fight when Ron said that Paeden couldn't beat up his dad. He wound up his fist for a hit and somehow managed to hit himself in the face so hard that he was knocked out.
- Leeroy Jenkins: Peaden is described as having "the eye of the tiger," though it's really just this. He's willing to fight anyone—yes, anyone—even though he's an awful fighter.
- Little Stowaway: Hides in the back seat of the car and tags along when the dads leave for Ravenloft.
- Mr. Exposition: As with most of the NPC's and side characters, his character is used to convey exposition like history or information about items/characters. Unique in that in-story he has the, "Eye of the Tiger" which allows him to see the power levels and stats of enemies. As he says though, it just allows him to see their strength, not actually help him win.
- The Napoleon: Short? Check. Loves picking fights? Double check.
- Put on a Bus: Played straight with and then hilariously subverted. The Dads, after vanquishing Vampire!Terry Sr. set up a makeshift adoption agency in the town in order to find him a proper home and eventually leave him with the town blacksmith. However it takes almost half an episode for the Dads to actually finish saying a tearful goodbye, and have to awkwardly keep passing by Paeden and his new stepfather as they try and leave town...and even then, evidently they don't actually move far enough away to keep Paeden from overhearing them or being close enough to run back to respond.
- Sociopathic Hero: His solution to Glenn's hiccups is to scare him by cutting his Achilles Tendon.
- Tag Along Kid: For a time, before he was Put on a Bus.
- Walking Spoiler: The dads are anchored to the forgotten realms and he is Darryl's anchor. He's holding the soul of Darryl's father.
Cern/Lizardboy Scales McStuffins
Cern
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
A lizard-man that starts off as an enemy of the dads, but later joins them on their journey.- Drama Queen: After leaving the party when discovering the dad's secret, Will is fairly certain he'll get over it.
- I Owe You My Life: Cern believes he owes the dads his life, since because of them he managed to leave the castle before it was crushed by a giant pyramid. He doesn't know that they're the ones that (accidentally) dropped it. When the truth is revealed later, this trope is dropped and Cern becomes a revenge-bent Death Seeker.
- Lizard Folk: True to his nickname of Lizardboy Scales McStuffins. Not as chaotic or evil as the trope usually is, once he introduces himself after initially being a nameless enemy.
- Poor Communication Kills: While disguised he tricks the dads into pulling cards from the Deck of Many Things. He believes they are in a field where violence can't happen, so they should be safe from many of its negative effects. However the dads disabled the field just a few minutes earlier.
The Library
The Library
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
A wandering creature that loves to collect and lend out books to anyone who wants one. Seems harmless enough at first, but something... seems off about him.Tropes:
- Hoist by His Own Petard: His own strict rules about killing anyone who damages his library books backfires when the dads trick him into destroying one of them, eventually leading to him bludgeoning himself to death.
- Humanoid Abomination: If any of the episodes that involve him retrieving books from his stomach, cutting off Darryl's hand with a tongue that acts like a saw or the hints he drops that he eats the flesh off children don't convince you he's this, the episode where the Dad's fight him and he reveals himself as a mass of rubbery flesh that wears cars as shells and smashes people to a pulp with books will. It seems as if his goofy personality is just a disguise for how terrifying he really is.
- Scary Librarian
- Would Hurt a Child: He'll kill anyone who fails to return his books on time, even if they're children.
Scam Likely/ Well, Actually.
Scam Likely
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
"Don't trust all you hear or see, you've been called by Scam Likely"
A shapeshifting trickster and general scam artist that, despite being a creature from the Forgotten Realms, seemingly has the ability to call the dads on their phones.Tropes:
- Dramatic Unmask: In episode 27, Benedict Cabbagepatch pulls off his moustache to reveal that he's been Scam Likely the whole time.
- Ink-Suit Actor: Anthony Burch says Scam Likely is just High School Anthony when he is transformed into Well, Actually.
- Insufferable Genius: Scam Likely becomes one after being resurrected and immediately alignment shifted into Well Actually.
- Master of Disguise: Can apparently disguise himself perfectly as more or less anyone.
- Names To Trust Immediately: Why wouldn't you trust a mysterious caller named Scam Likely?
- Shapeshifter Default Form: Pre-episode 44 is only ever seen imitating Glenn Close or Benedict Cabbagepatch. Since he's related to the horrifying Library, it may be A Form You Are Comfortable With.
- Shoo Out the Clowns: Killed when stealing the Orb of Dragon Stealing from the Purple Robes.
- Seemingly averted when resurrected by Mr. Moustache. However he very quickly is alignment shifted to Well Actually.
- Split-Personality Merge: Subverted. His opposite identities as Scam Likely and Well, Actually don't cleanly merge and seem to cause the newly-formed Scam Actually some amount of mental anguish.
- The Trickster
Erin O'Neil
Erin O'Neil
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
A garden witch that the Dads meet in Roqueporte. She takes her job so seriously that she considers trees and plants her children. After burning their books due to a misunderstanding, she temporarily joins the Dads as a Sixth Ranger on their quest.Tropes:
- Back from the Dead: Erin was the witch killed and resurrected in the one-off episode, "Interlude - The Witch is Dead." Which came in handy in the main campaign when she was killed by the Librarian.
- Eco-Terrorist: She isn't telling the dads to kill anyone on behalf of the trees. But if they did kill everyone in the forest then that would work out for her.
- Familiar: She keeps various birds as familiars.
- Gaia's Vengeance: Intendeds to overrun Roqueporte with awakened trees and drive out the villagers.
- Green Thumb: As a garden witch, she can command trees and plants according to her will.
- Ms. Exposition: Erin is very knowledgeable about the world, and she answers many questions the Dads have for her while they plan what they're going to do.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: She's exasperated,annoyed and generally exhausted with Daddies, but its pretty obvious that she's secretly quite fond of them.
- Witch Classic: She's the image of a traditional witch.
Walter the Immoral
Walter the Immoral
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
A bullywug blacksmith who lives in Roqueporte and becomes Paeden's adoptive father. He first appeared when the dads searched Roqueporte for a foster dad to leave Paeden with, and continues to help the dads out.Tropes:
- Forced Transformation: He was turned into a bullywug when he was labeled a murderer.
- Gadgeteer Genius: Probably counts as one given that he was able to build a functioning wooden motorcycle after inspecting the Honda Odyssey's engine for a single day.
- Nonindicative Name: Walter the Immoral is actually a very nice guy. Walter was given the title after a local hero using a sword he made was killed by the sword breaking and going into his throat.
- Offscreen Moment of Awesome: Apparently went on a grand adventure while babysitting the sons.
Yeet Bigly
Yeet Biggley
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
A competitor in the For Knights-tournament, brother to Killa Demall, and the Love Interest to Grant.Tropes:
- Cool Board: He has a skateboard attached directly to his legs, in lieu of feet.
- Eyepatch of Power: Always seen wearing an eyepatch that was later revealed to be covering a cybernetic eye.
- Implausible Boarding Skills: Along with being able to ride his skateboard on grass, he has been comboing tricks for literal years.
Doug The Intern
Doug the Intern
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
An intern for the Bad Dogs Mercenaries who joins the daddies when entering the pyramid.
- Heroic Comedic Sociopath: Shows up with a corpse the dads need. It's unclear whether or not he made the corpse or found it.
- The Friend Nobody Likes: In the stinger of the episode that has Doug's death by disintegration Will says Doug is the one character he doesn't care about.
Ratticus Finch
Ratticus Finch
Voiced by: Jenna Stoeber
A prosecuting attorney for Meth Bay. Also a rat with wings.
- Hollywood Law
- Non-Human Non-Binary: Uses they/them pronouns and is also a rat parent of 40 rat children.
- Rat Men: Exactly What It Says on the Tin
Dennis/Mark Likely
Dennis/ Mark Likely
Voiced by: Ashly Burch
Everyone's favorite dad and firefighter Mark.
- Ambiguous Gender: Scam Actually refers to them as a "sister-slash-brother."
- Enemy Mine: Hires the daddies to change Well Actually's alignment back to normal.
- Fake Memories: Only Ron doesn't remember traveling with Dennis.
- Humiliation Conga: When their brother brings up their old fanfiction. Written by Ashly Burch.
- Remember the New Guy?
- You Killed My Father: Blames the daddies for The death of his brother.
Elizabeth Warden
Elizabeth Warden
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
The warden of the Meth Bay Correctional Facility who sounds like United States Senator Elizabeth Warren.
- Talking Animal: Is retconned to be an elk after Beth mishears the word "elf".
Residents of Earth
Carol Wilson
Carol Wilson
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
Darryl Wilson's wife and the mother of Grant.- Happily Married: Averted. Carol is heard in the first episode chewing Darryl out for losing the kids and turning to Darnell, the kid's soccer coach. She's thinking of divorcing Darryl in part because she sees how happy Darnell is with his husband. In the finale they move toward reconciliation when they are reunited.
- Is This Thing Still On?: Accidentally leaves a message to Darryl on his phone where she confides to Darnell about her intentions to divorce Darryl...which she hasn't told Darryl himself yet.
Mercedes Oak-Garcia
Mercedes Oak-Garcia
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
Henry Oak's wife and the mother of Lark and Sparrow.
- Full-Name Basis: Henry/Will almost always refers to her as Mercedes Oak-Garcia, whereas other characters just say Mercedes.
- Granola Girl: Much like Henry.
- Mother Nature: Dresses up as Mother Earth when going into court.
Samantha Stampler
Samantha Stampler
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
Ron Stampler's wife and the mother of Terry Jr.
- Characterization Marches On: In a brief call she's introduced as a fairly normal person. In the second call it's apparent that she's as gullible as Ron in some ways.
- Cool Sword: In the finale she wields one against Barry Oak.
- Parent with New Paramour: Her husband, Terry Sr., passed away some time before the events of the podcast. She started dating Ron relatively quickly afterwards, according to Beth May.
Morgan Freeman
Morgan Freeman
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
Glenn Close's deceased wife. She becomes Jodie Foster's living wife when Glenn loses the court case.- The Lost Lenore: Deceased before the series starts. Glenn is offered the chance to bring her back by the Purple robes.
- Shotguns Are Just Better: Wields one in the finale when fighting Barry Oak.
Hermie Unworthy
Hermie the Unworthy
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
A weird theatre kid at San Dimas High School who takes method acting way too seriously. Initially written off as some weirdo obsessed with Scary, the Teens learn more about him after he accompanies Normal to the school dance and he quickly cements himself as their sidekick.
- Ambiguously Bi: Starts with an apparent crush on Scary and regularly flirts with Normal, though it's not clear how much of these interactions are genuine and how much is role preparation.
- Butt-Monkey: Gets horribly injured in every fight that he participates in.
- Connected All Along: It's revealed in Episode 23 of Season 2 that he's Taylor's uncle, the son of Jodie Foster and Scam Actually.
- Characterization Marches On: There was pretty much nothing in his initial appearances to suggest that he was anything more than some creepy wimp who wanted to score with Scary; it isn't until Episode 6 that his
Method Actor shtick is established. - Drama Club: The Teens eventually learn that he's a member of the San Dimas High drama club, and that his weird behavior when they first met was role preparation for a stage play adaptation of Joker.
- Fanboy: He really likes Batman's Rogues Gallery, and spends much of the Season Method Acting as them (first the Joker, then Two-Face, Poison Ivy, Mr. Freeze, etc).
- Method Acting: He takes this technique very seriously, much to the annoyance of pretty much everyone around him.
- Oblivious Adoption: He had no idea that he was adopted, and is shocked to discover that his real parents are both mysterious magical beings.
Antagonists
The Purple Robes **Major Spoilers** aka the Omega Daddies
Voiced by: Anthony Burch
Three mysterious robed figures who are implied to have brought the dads to the forgotten realms. In episode 29 it is revealed that they are the fathers of the main cast: Willie Stampler, Barry Oak, and Bill Close.The Omega Daddies in general:
- Ambiguous Situation: It starts unclear if they're really the dead grandfathers, or if they're like Terry Sr. They are the real grandads.
- The Archmage: Each of the Omega Dads are capable of casting 9th-level spells, putting them on par with the most powerful adventurers in a typical D&D adventure.
- Archnemesis Dad: To Ron, Glenn and Henry.
- Immortality Seeker: The Omega Daddies kidnap the main cast’s sons to fuel their Daddy Magic so that they can live forever.
- Talking in Your Dreams: They visit the Dads in their dreams to taunt and belittle their parenting.
- Toxic Friend Influence: The purple robes acknowledge that Willie is an awful person, but follow him.
Barry Oak
Henry’s father, a native of the Forgotten Realms, and leader of the Oakvale commune.- Big, Screwed-Up Family: The center of the dysfunctional Oak family and Oakvale commune. He manipulates, neglects, and gaslights his wife and son to the point where Autumn Oak tries to murder him. In response, he casts a nonviolence field around Oakvale and manipulates her into staying despite this.
- As of season 2 episode 23, revealed that he was also abusive to his mother, Hildy Russet.
- Like Father, Like Son: Despite the animosity, Henry's father seems somewhat similar to Henry in his love for yoga, druidic background, and deep anger issues.
- Manipulative Bastard: A cult leader who gaslights and controls Henry and most of his living relatives in the Forgotten Realms.
- Suppressed Rage: Henry calls out that his tranquil demeanor is a facade for this. Crosses over into Rage Breaking Point during both of his fights with the Dads.
- Voluntary Shapeshifting: Uses a variety of high level druid spells and abilities to shapechange into different monsters in combat.
- Would Hurt a Child: Punches and hurls a homunculus copy of Sparrow simply to provoke Henry.
Bill Close
Glenn Close’s deadbeat father and all-around scoundrel.- Big Bad Wannabe: Convinces himself that he can be the Man Behind the Man for Willie, but ends up being an easily-manipulated tool.
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Genuinely likes and (more or less) cares about Glenn, in contrast to the other Omega Daddies who view their sons as disappointments and/or tools.
- Generation Xerox: Bill and Glenn are nearly identical in taste, mannerisms, and worldview, a fact that helps them remain on good terms despite Bill otherwise being a worthless deadbeat.
- Hanging Judge: Serves as an obviously corrupt judge during the trial of Glenn Close. He apparently cares less for meting out justice than he does profiting off civil forfeiture. That said, this corruption nearly works in their favor since he genuinely doesn't want Glenn to be found guilty, but unfortunately Willie Stampler takes matters into his own hands.
- Heel–Face Turn: Turns to the Dads' side midway through the final battle, once he realizes that Glenn is both back from Hell and wasn't killed by the Dads.
- Parental Neglect: His poor fatherhood mostly took the form of this, in a manner very similar to Glenn's own relationship with Nick. He likes Glenn plenty, but he barely raised him beyond teaching him a variety of criminal skills, mostly for his own benefit.
- Quirky Bard: Is both a bard and the least competent of the three Omega Dads by a wide margin.
- The Starscream: In the season 1 finale it's revealed he was planning on betraying Willie.
- Token Good Teammate: Relatively speaking. While he's still a selfish criminal deadbeat, he isn't an outright abusive father like the other Omega Daddies and joined them mainly for the promise of wealth and power without really thinking about the consequences or morality of it. He has the best relationship with his son out of the three, repeatedly attempts to discreetly help the Dads out (albeit in a way that benefits him) and only fights them in the final battle because Willie convinced him they killed Glenn.
- What Happened to the Mouse?: Disappears without much fanfare after the season 1 finale.
Willie Stampler:
Ron Stampler’s father and the apparent leader of the Omega Dads.- Abusive Parents: Willie is constantly emotionally abusive to Ron both in the present and past, going as far as trying to murder a younger Ron in cold blood for ‘‘accidentally’’ stabbing him with a fishhook.
-
Anti-Climax Boss: Early in the finale Willie gets scared into a holding cell in an alternate dimension.
Anthony Burch: I had such big plans for that boy.
- Bad Powers, Bad People: Due to his patron pact with the Doodler. His magic tends to have a distinctly Black Magic aesthetic and favors necrotic damage.
- The Charmer: Described as ‘‘frustratingly’’ handsome by Anthony on multiple occasions. Also implied to get around.
- Fate Worse than Death: In the Season 1 finale Willie is trapped in an alternate dimension with a badly injured throat..
- The Bus Came Back as of season 2 episode 13 when the grandkids free him from imprisonment.
- The Friend Nobody Likes: This to the other Omega Daddies and Frank Wilson.
- Hero Killer: Uses the One-Hit Kill spell, Power Word: Kill, to kill Glenn Close before the season 1 finale. He is the only one of the Omega Dads to kill one of the main characters.
- Like Father, Unlike Son: He is a ‘’very’’ different person from Ron, particularly when contrasted with the other Dads’ relationships with their fathers. He is cruel and cunning whereas Ron is a genuinely kind, if somewhat bumbling step-father.
- Not Quite Dead: Ron assumed he had died after his attempted filicide left him drowning in a lake. He got better due to the intervention of The Doodler.
- Smug Snake: Can’t help taunting his victims and gloating, though it comes back to bite him on a few notable locations.
- The Sociopath: Is a charming, but ruthless and cold person who will use emotional manipulation and violence to achieve his ends. His self-description in Season 2 implies these traits may arise from a psychological disorder rather than simply being a cruel person.
The Doodler
]A seemingly innocuous mascot for the kid's soccer team made by Lark and Sparrow. Over the course of the podcast, the Doodler is revealed as a horrifying outer god whose deeds span multiple generations of the protagonists and planes of reality.
- Brown Note Being: Merely gazing upon its utterly massive form is enough to harm the minds of mortals.
- Eldritch Abomination: In spades. It is a reality warping, utterly gargantuan entity who destroys the minds of mortals through passive contact. In season 2, episode 13 it is revealed that the black sun which hangs over the Teen's world is the Doodler's eye
- Greater-Scope Villain: Directly or indirectly involved in the histories of at least half of the Dads, their fathers, and the twins. Revealed as an active threat as of the season 1 cliffhanger stinger.
- Hero Killer: Directly responsible for the death and disappearance of most of the grandparents.
- Power Incontinence: Implied as of season 2, episode 23 that the Doodler doesn't want to hurt people, but doesn't know how.
- You Cannot Grasp the True Form: Described as chaos incarnate, represented in both the literal scribbles made by Lark and Sparrow and the numerous scratches and blemishes on used film.
