The Dragonzball series has a wide and colorful cast of characters.
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Kaka Carrot Cake
Catholic, Cabbage, Faggot, Kaka Carmen Electra, Kaka Krabby Patty, Goku
"I am real Super Sand!"
Voiced by: Ricepirate
The main hero of the Dragonzball series, and real Super Sand. He possesses power stronger than an ant. If an ant were... this big.
- Abusive Parents: Calls his own son a faggot for wanting a hug and elbows him in the face.
- The Ace: He's a pretty skilled fella.
- Action Dad: He might be a daddy, but that won't stop him from wrestling buff dudes.
- Anime Hair: His trademark mane of spiky black hair.
- Attack of the 50-Foot Whatever: He inexplicably grows to giant size and destroys the earth at the end of the second episode.
- Badass Boast: Gives Freezy-Pop an epic one before their fight.
- Beware the Nice Ones: Kaka Carrot Cake is a very easy-going and kind person who tries to be polite and friendly to everyone, but you do not want to piss him off. Freezy-Pop found that out the hard way.
- Big Damn Heroes: Whenever things look like they’re the most grim, he'll usually appear out of nowhere and save the day (or least give the heroes a fighting chance).
- Blood Knight: Loves to give evil a good slap.
- Boisterous Bruiser
- Bruiser with a Soft Center: A powerful yet gentle man. Noticably cried over Virginia's untimely demise.
- Comically Invincible Hero: Wins fights without much effort.
- Defeating the Undefeatable: His triumphant victory over Frisbee.
- Good Is Not Soft: He'll beat you bloody, even to the point of bisection.
- Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold: As a Super Sand.
- Hard Head: Hard enough to destroy a planet.
- The Hero
- Heroic Build: He has the gorgeous sculpted body of a Greek god.
- Human Alien: He looks like a human, but he is not a human, despite looking like a human.
- Hunk: A tall, brave, mascular man with the sensual voice of Mick Lauer.
- Idiot Hero: He's definitely not smarter than an ant.
- It's Personal: Towards Freezy-Pop after Kristen is killed.
- Lightning Bruiser: Virginia and Freezy-Pop didn't even have time to react before he beat them.
- Make Me Wanna Shout: His screaming is potent enough to seriously hurt Frisbee's ears.
- Manly Tears: Weeps as Virginia begs him to show Frisbee what for.
- N-Word Privileges: Implied. He calls his son a "faggot", and tells Freezy Pop he's gay without a moment's hesitation.
- Shonen Hair: So spiky.
- Signature Move: A flying smack to the face.
- Sizeshifter: He inexplicably ends up at a size bigger than the earth in the second animation, parodying the Sky Face trope.
- Super Mode: His Super Sand form.
- Straight Gay
- Trademark Favorite Food: According to Word of God, he loves cake.
- Traumatic Superpower Awakening: Only awakens the Super Sand Lesbian within him after Virginia and Kristen Stewart are savagely killed.
Virginia
Vagina, Banana
"Defeating a sandwich... only makes it tastier!"
Voiced by: Chris O'Neill
The royal prince of all Saiyans, and Kaka Carrot Cake's rival. Likes to fight people, acting demickey, and hanging out with little boys in spandex.
- 24-Hour Armor: He's always wearing protection.
- Alas, Poor Villain: His death is especially poignant once we learn of his depressing backstory.
- Ambiguously Gay: Apparently hanging out with little boys in spandex is something he often does.
- He also has a heart-shaped tattoo that reads "ANAL".
- Ax-Crazy: He's inSAIYAN.
- Big Bad: Of Dragonzball P.
- Butt-Monkey: Winds up bloody and on the ground in both videos.
- Cold-Blooded Torture: Horrifically subjected to this by Freezy-Pop. No mortal man's buttcheeks should be abused like that.
- Defiant to the End: Holds on to his sprinkle tinkle pride even as he dies.
- Disc-One Final Boss: The first major thread faced, but not the last one.
- Evil Versus Evil: His epic showdown against Frisbee.
- Forehead of Doom: Oh baby look at that thing.
- Freudian Excuse: When he was just a little boy, Freezy-Pop didn't invite him to his birthday party.
- Manly Tears: As he begins to feel the sweet embrace of death.
- Mistaken for Pedophile: By Freezy-Pop, who's rather suspicious about him hanging out with little boys in spandex.
- Pride: A true Saiyan always sprinkles when he tinkles, no matter what.
- Tsurime Eyes: Whenever he's drawn as close to normal as possible.
- Underestimating Badassery: Believes Kaka Carrot Cake isn't real Super Sand. Boy was he wrong.
- Undignified Death: Dies crying after getting his buttcheeks groped.
- Warrior Prince
- The Worf Effect: Frisbee absolutely destroys him just to show how powerful he is.
- Would Hurt a Child: Was fully prepared to give Goo Goo a serious pounding before ol' Freezy showed up.
Goo Goo
Gohan, Faggot
"Daddy!"
Voiced by: Chris O'Neill
Kaka Carrot Cake's son. Just wants a hug.
- The Baby of the Bunch: The youngest in our gaggle of heroes.
- Cower Power: Clutches Kristen Stewart in fear when Freezy-Pop arrives.
- Intergenerational Friendship: He's close with Kristen.
Kristen Stewart
"We're really in for it now, Gohan!"
Voiced by: Chris O'Neill
Kaka Carrot Cake's midget best friend. Often finds himself in for it.
- Half the Man He Used to Be: After being hit by Freezy-Pop's blast.
- Intergenerational Friendship: He's good friends with Goo Goo.
- Killed Mid-Sentence
- Major Injury Underreaction: His response to being blasted in half? A soft "oh nooooo."
- The Noseless
- Skintone Sclerae: His eyes are the same color as his skin, even resembling a firm and luscious pair of breasts at one point.
- Tempting Fate: His reaction to Freezy-Pop's "defeat".
- Wow, I'm glad that's over! For a second there I thought that... oh wow I guess he really-
- This Is Gonna Suck: Makes it very clear that he's not looking forward to fighting Virginia. Luckly, Freezy-Pop shows up.
Freezy-Pop
Frisbee
"Prepare to deeaauuugghh!"
Voiced by: Stamper
A tyrannical evil overlord who is trying to take over the galaxy, and every bit as cold-hearted as his name suggests. After a lot of cat and mouse with the P Fighters on Planet Namek, he comes into confrontation with Kaka Carrot Cake, leading to the single longest fight in the entire series.
- Accidental Hero: His arrival stops Virginia from attacking Goo Goo and Kristen.
- Aliens Are Bastards: This white n' purple lizard guy is a real meanie.
- Authority Equals Asskicking: Emperor of the Universe, and a tough cookie to boot.
- Ax-Crazy: He might not be inSAIYAN, but he's definitely psychotic.
- Cold-Blooded Torture: Subjects Virginia to this, and it ain't pretty.
- When I'm through with you, you'll have to pee sitting down like a girl!
- Depraved Homosexual: He gropes Virginia's ass after beating him down.
- The Dreaded: Everyone stops what they're doing in sheer terror the second Freezy shows up.
- Even Evil Has Standards: He loves Vagina but he can't be hanging out with little boys in spandex, c'mon.
- Finger Gun: He can fire a laser from his finger that's so powerful, it can cleanly cut you in two.
- Half the Man He Used to Be: Speaking of getting cut in half, Kaka Krabby Patty returns the favor.
- Hero Killer: Virginia was more of a sexy anti-hero, but killing Kristen definitely made him this.
- Ironic Death: Sliced in half like Kristen before him.
- Pet the Dog: Gives Kaka Carrot Cake the chance to leave Namek before it explodes.
- Pint-Sized Powerhouse: Frisbee might be a space-manlet, but he sure can pump a chump full of death!
- Smug Super: He relishes how powerful he is. It's delicious to him.
- Villain Respect: Despite everything on Namek, he admits that Kaka Carmen Electra had been a good boy the whole time he was there.
- You Shall Not Pass!: Refuses to give Vagina any room for escape when they have their confrontation.
Pickle-O
