Follow TV Tropes


Characters / Dr Crafty Crafty Crew

Go To

    open/close all folders 

Main Hosts

    Doctor Crafty 
Doctor Crafty, AKA Colin Alexander Crafterson
"Hello, hello, hello, my subjects!"
Click to see him in his youth 
Voiced by: Alex Tansley

The titular Villain Protagonist himself, Dr. Crafty is a wildly eccentric scientific artist who indulges in his day-to-day activities with hammy bravado and general hilarity, creating characters through his artwork that (sometimes) result in spontaneous outcomes. Although he failed art college in his youth, he hopes to use his YouTube series to eventually Take Over the World...somehow. Despite his efforts on being a villain, however, he does have a heart buried inside him, and it doesn't take much to uncover it.

Expectedly, Crafty was designed by — and serves as a social media avatar for — Alex Tansley himself.

  • Absurd Phobia: As unveiled in “The Cretinous Critters,” Crafty has a deep-seated fear of Blob Monsters, all thanks to Mr Blobby. While they're Played for Laughs, Crafty's fears aren’t totally unfounded; in this show, Mr. Blobby is a vengeful deity, who, as “Best Yugioh Monsters” establishes, has his own dedicated cult of fellow slimes.
    • When Merry makes him do art involving Mr. Blobby in the first Patreon episode, Crafty desperately (and repeatedly) tries to end the episode.
    • His fear became a bit more complicated when Messibelle became part of the Crew. He discusses this moral conundrum openly with Nurse in “A Well Slimed Machine,” where he justifies both his fear of slime creatures and his reasons for keeping Messi around.
      Nurse: "Well, in any case, I’d say you almost seem to be getting over your fear of slime creatures. I mean, you keep Messi around, don’t you?"
      Crafty: "Well... Messibelle is different. I couldn’t possibly throw her outside — or very bad things would happen."
      (There’s a cut to some footage showing the phone booth death scene from The Blob (1988). The footage returns to Crafty and Nurse.)
      Nurse: "I’d imagine that sexy outfit you dressed her up in helps, too."
      Crafty: "It helps that she doesn’t look like... him."
      (Blobby himself appears, snarls at the duo, then promptly vanishes. Crafty and Nurse look mortified.)
      Nurse: "O-OKAY! Maybe we need to take a break and talk about something else?!"
      Crafty: "YES. PLEEAASE!"
    • In the following commentary segment, Nurse reappears wearing giant googly eyes to evoke Blobby and prank Crafty, who screams in response. They then discuss the possibility of him conquering his fear, and he admits to making some progress. He doesn’t stop easing up on his fear, either; by Season 4, he sees Messi as his surrogate daughter, and the feeling is more than mutual.
  • Alliterative Name: Discounting his middle name, Crafty's real name's parts all start with C's: Colin Crafterson.
  • Affably Evil: In “The Dreadful Doctor,” Crafty goes out of his way to paint himself as the baddest supervillain around, but he remains cordial with his audience and mostly just seems happy to have company. As foreshadowed in this first episode, the series pokes several holes into Crafty's villainous facade, exposing it as (mostly) just an act, and that the real Crafty is a troubled young man who really just wants love of any kind.
  • Art Initiates Life: Crafty's art can sometimes come to life. In Season 1, the exact mechanics of this ability run on the Rule of Funny. Sometimes, he wills an art piece into coming to life, which is how he gifts Nurse Goozie in "The Cretinous Critters." Other times, as "The Monster, the Sniper and the CLOD" implies, it's completely involuntary, leading to a stockpile of now-sentient art being shoved into Crafty's storage. This leads to the Junkrat drawn in "A lovely day for Meihem!" becoming the show's resident garbage disposal from that point forward. Since then, however, it's strictly voluntary on Crafty's part if an art piece comes to life or not. This ability pays dividends in "The Foreshadow Game," where he combines this skill with the Shadow Realm's rules to create an all-new monster card to defeat Bakura once and for all.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance: His lab coat has an impressively large high collar and is very long, with much of it trailing behind him like a cape. It appears Crafty's evoking an Evil Overlord design through the Mad Scientist aesthetic, to make him seem more impressive as a villain. As a bonus, he lives in a giant, dark castle to reinforce the image.
  • Badass Longcoat: He sports a long lab coat that reaches the floor. When Crafty regains control of his body in the "Foreshadow Game," he removes his arms from his coat, letting it trail behind him like a Badass Cape.
  • Bad Boss: Crafty isn’t the easiest person to work with; being egotistical and driven by the need to put on a show, he can be ignorant of other people’s feelings. It’s much less severe with his cohosts — rather, his zombie staff faces the brunt of his mistreatment. According to “Crafty Hearts Re: Grouped,” Crafty doesn’t even remember their names most of the time. He completely misidentifies Nero, who insults Crafty under his breath.
  • Bad Liar: In Episode 33, he claimed he had to take a break because a Greninja injured his spleen, but neither Nurse nor Darksilvania bought it, knowing Crafty just wanted to take a nap instead.
  • Berserk Button:
    • Whatever you do, don't mention Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts to him. He pauses his otherwise heartfelt call for Banjo and Kazooie's Smash inclusion in "Smash Newcomers" to explode — figuratively and literally — over the infamous game.
    • Shown in the "Foreshadow Game," Yu-Gi-Oh! ZEXAL and the Link Monsters system are the two aspects of Yu-Gi-Oh that he absolutely loathes. He'll gladly rant about either for a long while, if uninterrupted.
    • As Nurse learns in "LoveCrafty," Crafty hates it when anyone other than Sasha refers to him as "Colin." When Nurse does so while trying to calm him down, he responds with one of his most intense, venomous bouts of anger on the show. Thankfully, it's cut off by his immediate regret. Unlike the other examples, this one is treated with dead seriousness.
      Crafty: "NEVER call me that name! YOU DON'T GET TO—"
  • Big "WHAT?!": In “Patreon Palava,” Merry decides to add conflict to her script by introducing a Love Triangle between Crafty, Nurse, and Molly. The real Crafty can only respond to her ideas repeatedly with “WHAT?!” Merry’s antics in the sequel episode, “She’s Back… in Pink,” elicits the same response a few more times.
  • Brain Bleach:
    • During Episode 27, Nurse talking about anatomy drawing classes causes Crafty to recall when he was in art college. He was scarred by the sight of a model taking off his robe... As he relives the memory, in place of direct visuals, a picture of two apples next to a banana flies past him in the background.
    • In Episode 41, he yells for bleach after witnessing some of the more...animatedly grotesque attempts to render breasts.
  • Camp Straight: One look at the doctor and the word 'flamboyant' comes to mind. Nurse even mentions how she gets Crafty's sexuality confused sometimes thanks to his mannerisms.
  • Cannot Tell Fiction from Reality: “The Legend of Lonk” opens with Crafty waking up in the world of The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. It turns out he’s hallucinating; he has played the game so much that he started daydreaming.
  • Card-Carrying Villain:
    • While Crafty’s villainy is merely an act, he is extremely insistent on upholding that act. He groans upon realizing that he acted “accidentally inspiring and sentimental” for a moment in “GEMS! Truly Outrageous,” but Nurse talks him into continuing to act that way for the rest of the episode. When she checks in on him later, he admits that he forgot to stay the course, feeling more comfortable behaving as he usually does.
    • As the show progresses, he grows less and less focused on upholding his villainy as much, especially when it nearly comes to bite him in “I Need a Hero Academia.” He plainly introduces himself to Class 1-A as the “Internet Villain Extraordinaire,” which causes the students to initially mistrust him. Had it not been for All-Might’s intuition and Crafty eventually choosing to be forthright about himself, he likely wouldn’t have gotten the help he needed most.
  • Catchphrase:
    • Being the first episode, "The Dreadful Doctor" establishes some of Crafty's most common phrases:
      • He openly discusses his choice of catchphrase while preparing the bust drawing of himself. He decides on "Let's Get Crafty!" (an altered version of which starts most of the episode descriptions), since his original choice — "Watch my show or I'll come to your house and genetically fuse you to your bathtub" — wasn't really marketable.
      • Also starting here, Crafty has a distinct set of cries of indignation. They consist of a scientific figure’s name, oftentimes followed by a zany descriptor. The very first one he uttered in this episode was "Oh, Einstein's Earwax!" Some other notable examples include "By Mendele" and "COPERNICUS" in "Dumb Dingies," in response to Messi's lusting.
    • Any time he tosses the Dragon Vicennial, he shouts “Roll for Dragon!”
  • Cloud Cuckoo Lander:
    • While Crafty touts himself as a villain, he's a wacky eccentric first and foremost. His weirdness serves as the instigator for many plots on the show, whose equally offbeat sense of humor complements his own. For a small example, he spends Fakémon Month insisting that his grass-type starter Pokémon is a donkey and not a rhino. He remains staunchly ignorant of his mistake, continuously driving some mild conflict between him and Nurse until the month ends.
    • By "We're Back! A Crafty Story," Crafty stops committing to his villainous persona so deeply. Consequentially, his mean-spirited sense of humor is downplayed for his zaniness to shine through even more. After Sasha's visit, he starts the episode by hallucinating a grand reintroduction for the show. He later decides to show off how his friends have improved since Season 3 by recording them with a camera in their workspaces. Despite clearly being in the same room as his friends, Crafty acts like he's observing them alone and from a distance. Everyone rolls with it despite their confusion.
  • Delayed "Oh, Crap!": In "The Foreshadow Game" it takes him nearly a minute to realize Nurse is possessed by Bakura, and later, it takes even longer for him to figure out he and the crew ended up in the Shadow Realm.
  • Do Not Call Me "Paul": He takes issue with being called his first name since it reminds him of his time with Sasha. In Episode 58, he briefly snaps at Nurse when she referred to him as Colin. However, he just as quickly collects himself and apologizes to her.
  • Driven to Suicide: A teenage Crafty, overwhelmed by his depression, once tried leaping off a cliff, which led to him meeting Sasha for the first time. "I Need a Hero Academia" reveals he almost tried jumping again weeks after they broke up, but he ultimately didn't commit to it. Nurse Worse's cries for help distracted him, and her dismemberment even more so. At that point, his mind was fixated on repairing the girl, and he's forever grateful for her indirectly saving his life.
  • Emo Teen: As he himself explains in “LoveCrafty,” Crafty was quite a troubled youth, saddled with depression, loneliness, and even some suicidal thoughts. However, he got better over time — his time with Sasha certainly helped, but after she left him, he regressed back into a depressive state. However, a flashback in “I Need a Hero Academia” shows him overcoming this new wave of depression, thanks to getting distracted by saving Nurse’s life.
  • Everyone Has Standards: While he has a preference for women with voluptuous figures, he draws the line at unrealistic Gag Boobs, especially when they're immensely bouncy. In “Bikini Bodies,” he shares Nurse’s disgust and horror over the matter.
  • Evil Brit: A born Brit, Crafty's implied to be very prideful of his home country. Apropos of nothing, a British flag appears in the background when Crafty makes a Rousing Speech about first drafts in "Street Frighters." He also derisively refers to Canadians as “discount Brits” in “Dongs Out for Donkey Kong.”
  • Fat and Skinny: Crafty is chiefly the skinny to Nurse's fat. However, he also shares this dynamic with Pepper over in the Chara-Cafe, who is much chubbier than Nurse. Even Messibelle fulfills the dichotomy over at the Top Ten Tub, or at least halfway — while she has a thin waist, she's very bottom-heavy, whereas Crafty is rail-thin across his entire body.
  • Fainting: Crafty finds himself fainting in fear thanks to the Furry Fandom in “Pros and Comms.” He recovers after Nurse tells him someone donated $1000 to his Patreon.
  • Fed to the Beast: As a Running Gag, whenever there's an unwanted character around, Crafty sometimes tosses them into a special dungeon. There, a voracious Junkrat — specifically, the one Crafty draws in “A lovely day for Meihem” — eats them alive. This is the most consistently evil thing Crafty does on the show, but he mostly reserves it for any unwanted art that comes to life. He also uses this Junkrat as a punishment for fired employees; the focus tester Crafty creates in “Hyde and Shriek” is shoved into a dark room with Junkrat, and she never comes back out.
  • Genius Ditz:
    • Crafty’s not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, but when it comes to talking about pop-culture franchises he likes, he's surprisingly quite knowledgable. When he's not actively trying to be funny, his commentary about certain properties is surprisingly insightful and well-researched. It's something Nurse picks up on in "ORA ORA ORARMS" as Crafty elaborates on his thoughts on Punch-Out and ARMS.
    • He’s also pretty masterful at learning things on the fly; a flashback in “I Need a Hero Academia” reveals how he resuscitated a dismembered Nurse with only a passing glance at an anatomy book.
    • “Dumb Dingies” implies that, on some level, he deliberately makes stupid decisions as part of his supervillain schtick. He drops a piano on himself after growing sickened with how sappy Nurse was acting over her body image, prompting a revealing non sequitur:
      Crafty, dazed: “...Acting like an idiot so I can run away from my problems forever… owww, ohhhh that’s the good stuff.”
  • Given Name Reveal: The flashback in “Aqua Marina” reveals that Crafty’s real name is Colin. He himself proudly declares his full name in the climax of “The Foreshadow Game’s” last part: Colin Alexander Crafterson.
  • The Glasses Come Off: He takes off his goggles before confronting Ring Nurse in "The Foreshadow Game," helping to signify that he isn’t playing around anymore.
  • Goggles Do Something Unusual: As the first episode establishes, Crafty wears Google Goggles, which lets him search for reference pictures with voice commands. He decides to switch to Bing after leaving Safe Search off once too many.
  • Has a Type: Judging by Nurse Worse, Pepper, Messibelle, Madame Crystelle, and Stylene, Crafty seems to prefer Rubenesque, intelligent women. "A Lovely Day For Meiham" supports this claim when he gushes about Mei:
    Crafty: "There's something to be said about a woman of science and intelligence... Plus she has those healthy curves, and cute glasses, and is clearly capable of responsibly carrying a whole team herself."
  • Hidden Depths: For someone frequently written off as a moron, Crafty has demonstrated some surprising intelligence outside of art:
    • Various gadgets that appear throughout the series — a machine that creates simple Pokemon OCs in "Original Characterror," a machine that shocks him if he acts lecherous in "Bikini Bodies," and the oven he gifts Pepper in "I'MA VAMPIRE," to name a few — are designed and built by him on a whim.
    • Meanwhile, Crafty can acquire and apply new skills surprisingly quickly. To cap off Season 3, "I Need a Hero Academia" celebrates this aspect of him heavily. In a flashback to his younger years, he completely reassembles a dismembered Nurse after merely skimming an anatomy book, and he creates a functioning defibrillator out of spare cables and random equipment. In the present-day, he inherits Deku's quirk and utilizes it to brutal, epic effect in just one night.
  • Inelegant Blubbering: The topic of Wizardmon in “Original Characterror” causes Crafty to bawl comically. The species is inextricably linked to the one from Digimon Adventure, during which that Wizardmon meets a tragic end. Crafty hasn’t gotten over it.
  • I Just Want to Have Friends: In "Love-Crafty," Crafty admits that he was a very lonely child growing up. His attempts to reach out to others and stand out above the crowd to do so never bore fruit. When the pressure of that loneliness became too much to bear, he was Driven to Suicide in his teens, only to be saved by Sasha. He eventually made friends with her, and as an adult, thanks to his show's cohosts, his friend group expanded greatly.
  • Informed Attribute:
    • It becomes clear as the show progresses that Crafty's villainy is an act. He's still kind of a jerk off-camera, but he's nowhere near as bad as he claims to be, a dichotomy best demonstrated by "Crafty Hearts Re: Grouped." There, he earnestly apologizes to Nurse for his behavior up to that point, but only after filming finished so he wouldn't break character. After a while, he stops trying to uphold the act as much, allowing for episodes such as "LoveCrafty," where he speaks candidly about some of his personal issues.
    • He verbally entertains several screwed-up ideas while on the air: mutating puppies in “The Dreadful Doctor, and sawing off Nurse's hands to create an Ultra-Hand-inspired ARMS character in “ORA ORA ORARMS,” and chemically halting children's development in “Life as a Teenage Pokémon.” However, absolutely nothing comes out of these ideas; it’s strongly implied he’s only talking about them to make his Dr. Crafty persona seem eviler.
    • With all that said, certain episodes from Season 1 demonstrate that he’s not entirely innocent. It's just that his evilest acts and thoughts — some of them bearing more consequences than others — only ever occur when the show is live, again implying that it’s all an act:
      • Starting with “The Monster, the Sniper and the CLOD,” Crafty shoves any of his unwanted, now-sentient art into storage, where a Junkrat he also drew in a prior episode eats them alive.
      • It's also possible he's responsible for the Pokemon narrator getting shot during “You’re as Cold as Ice-Type.”
      • Before the show starts in "Street Frighters," he meets up with Jedah Dohma to settle a deal. The payment is a soul sacrifice, and Crafty agrees to it without hesitation, all for the sake of making his show more popular. The souls are later returned because they belonged to Crafty’s meme-spouting YouTube commenters, and Jedah feels he was scammed. This act earns Crafty Jedah’s ire for the rest of the show.
  • Iron Butt Monkey: Crafty takes a lot of punishment throughout the series, but usually comes out none the worse for wear. It's revealed in the season 3 finale that this is due to him possessing the last Infinium Heart a relic that is said to hold unfathomable power, that he gained during his relationship with Sasha.
  • It's All About Me:
    • Being the host of the show has given Crafty quite an ego. He often gets lost in the persona he’s upholding. He becomes all too focused on joke-telling at deeply inappropriate times, and he can be ignorant of other people’s issues with him in the moment. “We’re Back! A Crafty Story” showcases this aspect of him prominently. He’s so wrapped up in upholding a bit that he doesn’t pay attention to Crystelle’s incredibly concerning warnings about the future.
    • Often, he claims his opinion is superior to others and won't let others talk about subjects in detail for him just because it's his show. A prominent example is his confusion over what constitutes a Blue-Eyes White Dragon in “Black Magic Woman,” where he thinks one particular dragon from How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World is the Yu-Gi-Oh monster:
      Pepper: “I... *sigh*... I guess you aren’t technically wrong...”
      Crafty: “Obviously! Because I’m never wrong.”
    • When comparing the images of everyone in swimsuits in “Dumb Dingies,” he shares his low opinion of Nurse’s, implicitly comparing it unfavorably to the drawing depicting himself. Then, he later flat-out declares the image of himself to be better than everyone else’s.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Crafty is all too focused on selling himself as a villain, so he tends to be an ignorant jerk a lot of the time. That said, when he’s not upholding the act, Crafty is, while not perfect, actually pretty nice. In "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped," the Season 3 premiere, he even apologizes to Nurse for his treatment of her throughout their time together. From that point forward, he gradually lets more of his true, nicer personality shine through towards everyone, strengthening the bonds with his friends.
  • Kick the Dog: While Crafty can be quite an ass to anyone, Sasha sometimes brings out the worst in him. When Sasha's brought to her lowest point and appears before him in "The Foreshadow Game," Crafty starts ranting about their unresolved personal issues unprompted, which makes Sasha feel far worse. During their shared dream in "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped," he tauntingly asks Sasha if he should throw himself off a cliff again to get her to return for good. Both times, Crafty is rightfully called out, and after having some sense talked into him, he backs off and recognizes his poor choices. Thankfully, their interaction in "We're back! A Crafty Story!" demonstrates some growth on his part. He's frustrated at first since Sasha doesn't show up in his dream... Because she's shown up to him in person and wakes him up. After the initial shock, he quickly calms down to listen to what Sasha has to say, even taking a moment to thank her for his Infinium Heart.
  • Lame Pun Reaction: There are times where a pun is bad even for Crafty, and he’ll be very vocal about his displeasure. For example, in “Dumb Dingies,” he demands to know why Messibelle would lust after her own chibi drawing. Her response straight-up offends him:
    Messibelle, coquettishly: "Because... chi-bi dead sex-seh~..."
    (Here, the camera zooms in on Messi while text appears to enunciate each individual syllable in Messi's sentence, really driving the pun home. When she finishes, the camera zooms out to show Crafty stewing in offended silence.)
    Crafty: "... COPERNICUS! That's the worst pun I've ever heard, and it's not even mine!"
  • Large Ham: Crafty can get quite into it, especially with his maniacal laughter.
  • Laughably Evil: His commentating style tends to be focused on joking around and snarking, especially early on in the show. Of course, his unending streak of bad luck and massive ego means he also invites many kinds of gags unintentionally. “Dumb Dingies,” for example, has him slam himself with time-traveling pianos, and him shamelessly commercializing his artwork earns him the scorn of his coworkers, who finish the episode by chasing him out of the lab as he lets out a goofy scream.
  • Lean and Mean: He's pencil-thin, and is a Card-Carrying Villain to boot. This facet of his design gives him a distinguishable silhouette compared to his cohosts, who range from curvy to very heavy-set.
  • Let's Get Dangerous!: With or without assistance, Crafty can be a legitimate force to be reckoned with in combat. It’s best shown throughout "I Need a Hero Academia," where he confidently and competently leads the charge against Mindstein to take his castle back while putting Deku’s loaned quirk to exceptional use.
  • Mad Scientist: Crafty dresses like an early depiction of an evil scientist, and he lives and breathes the aesthetic like no other. At the end of the day, however, it seems to be just a costume. It's not that he's incapable of mad-scientist-shenanigans, but most of what he calls "experiments" are just his drawing sessions.
  • Manchild:
    • Almost every aspect of Crafty’s life in the present-day — whether the show is airing or not — hinges on his elaborate game of Dress-Up. Because he's upholding the Mad Scientist shtick 24/7, he’s consequentially quite petty, entitled, and bad-tempered. His commitment to his act is highlighted as early as “The Cretinous Critters.” Even though his goggles are interfering with his perception of color, he petulantly refuses to take them off.
    • A lot of his tastes in character design are influenced by what his inner child enjoys most. “Super fighting monsters! MEGAMON” houses a microcosm of this child-like glee:
      Darksilvania: “Mega Manectric just looks like something the artist’s 9-year-old child drew.”
      Crafty: “What a load of bollocks! Look at that cool lightning bolt!
      Nurse: “I always thought you were twenty-nine going on nine!”
    • “Socialising is Arcane” shows off an extremely direct sign of his childishness: he not only collects toys, but he also roleplays with them. His sessions show off some creativity that is as cuckoo-bananas as a literal child’s imagination. Nurse lightly pokes fun at this activity at first, but Crafty later holds a session with her to cheer her up after her mood takes a dive.
  • Mean Character, Nice Actor: Dr. Crafty is a brash supervillain who, despite his mostly harmless antics, tends to be a bit of a dick. This is a consequence of him being the only member of the Crafty Crew who is fully committed to villainous aesthetic. By contrast, Colin Crafterson, the man behind the act, is quite a kindhearted person despite his issues. As the series progresses, Crafty reconciles these two sides of himself, to the point where he stops upholding the villainy as much. "LoveCrafty" is where this transition starts taking off; there, he candidly elaborates on some personal issues from his past with both Nurse and his audience, not even bothering to maintain the act. From that point forward, Crafty slowly becomes more comfortable expressing himself, allowing him to create an even stronger rapport with his crew in and out of the show.
  • Meaningful Name: He's a mad scientist who regularly dabbles in arts and crafts. His literal craftiness, meanwhile, often leaves a lot to be desired.
  • Megaton Punch: Despite lacking a muscular physique, he’s able to perform an uppercut strong enough to launch people into the stratosphere. The heavyset Disgustilda receives such a punch in “Fighting Game Characters,” and it’s the only punch Crafty needs to take her down.
  • Minor Injury Overreaction: In "Those Wascally Wabbids," he's left overreacting after Mario grazes him with a gunshot wound, tearfully requesting a glow-in-the-dark band-aid for it.
  • Morally Ambiguous Doctorate: Nurse calls out Crafty for owning a PhD that isn’t even his in “The Dubious Duo.” It’s in viticulture (the study of grapes); apparently, Crafty swindled the degree from its original owner after he got him drunk on his own supply of wine.
  • Never My Fault: He claims he's not responsible for planning a beach vacation or forgetting to bring sunscreen, but of course, he is.
  • Nice to the Waitress: In "New Season, New Friends," Crafty recalls the time he met Pepper, which was back when she was working as a waitress at the Fish'n'Fish. Just by looking at her, he could tell she was restricted and miserable in her position, so Crafty decided to hire Pepper to work under him. This time, however, he hired her to work as a chef once more. The moment is notable as an early demonstration of Crafty's inner kindheartedness.
  • Oblivious to Love: Crafty doesn't seem to notice Nurse Worse's clear affections for him at all. Messi points out how, by the time of “Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped,” he’s still somehow the only person in the castle who doesn’t recognize Nurse’s crush on him.
  • Oh, Crap!: In Episode 19, he grows apprehensive upon realizing the trick-or-treaters dressed up as witches on Halloween aren't actually witches. It's justified because he used them to "keep the fireplace warm" (read: used them as kindle).
  • Old Flame: Before the show, he and Sasha used to be an item. Despite them being separated for fifteen years, he still has romantic feelings for her, something he makes all too clear in the final moments of "The Foreshadow Game." However, succeeding episodes highlight how his outlook on her is more complicated than mere longing.
  • Only in It for the Money: While initially hesitant to let Merry co-host the first Patreon episode, he later changes his mind when he hears he'll get paid for doing the episode (complete with dollar sign Wingding Eyes for added emphasis). However, he puts up an effort to resist when Merry returns with a fresh check for a second episode...only to give in when she threatened to commission Shadman instead.
  • Parental Substitute: Messibelle, despite being born a young adult, is effectively Crafty’s daughter, being a sentient mixture of cleaning chemicals that Crafty poured down his sink. Having no one else to turn to, Messi slowly starts regarding him as her father, starting with “Crafty Fan Characters.” Both of them are fairly uncomfortable with the idea at first, but they quickly come around to it by “Disney Characters,” where Crafty briefly banters with Messi over her allowance. Even so, they treat each other as peers most of the time.
  • Peek-a-Bangs: As a teenager, Crafty’s hair concealed much of his face. Symbolically, it represented his feelings of sorrow and loneliness, almost to the point of killing himself. "I Need a Hero Academia" reveals that he lost this hairstyle, and much of his depression, after fixing Nurse Worse — the hair became what it is today thanks to a mild electrical accident.
  • The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: Despite being a self-proclaimed diabolical scientist, he never does any real schemes, plotting, or any supervillain-related activities. He just seems content with doing his web series.
  • The Power of Love: Crafty proves time and time again that he is somehow, despite his lanky frame, Made of Iron. It turns out there is a very good reason for why he's this way: his body contains a completed Infinium Heart, and it was apparently created when he and Sasha made love, as they figured out in “We’re Back! A Crafty Story.” The heart gives Crafty incredible durability; when he's under great stress derived from his friends being in danger, it can boost his physical prowess as well.
  • Pungeon Master: A huge portion of the show’s humor comes from Crafty’s pun-cracking. Though, when his co-hosts get into the pun-making, he sometimes gets annoyed, even if their puns happen to be no better than his. Among those in the main cast, Pepper’s jokes receive Crafty’s disapproval the most. “Best Skullgirl” shows what happens when she tries salvaging her attempts with more weak puns:
    Crafty: “I’ve been… dying to get started on this one. Pepper, take it away!”
    Pepper: “Abs-SKULL-loutely!
    Crafty: “... Really?”
    Pepper: “Ehehe... Sorry. That joke didn’t have a ghost of a chance at landing, did it?”
    Crafty: “Just... just get to the art.”
    Pepper: “R-right away!”
  • Screw the Rules, I Make Them!: In "Yugi (Yugioh) vs. Sakura (Cardcaptors)," even though he and Nurse tied for the final Death Debate score, he thought he could change it to make himself the winner, just because he's the host.
  • Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: He threatened to quit if Nurse did another "Sister Suffrage" joke, even though he couldn't quit because it's his show.
  • Seen It All: He's seen so many weird things throughout the series that the sudden appearance from Team Rocket in Episode 34 doesn't even phase him.
  • Small Name, Big Ego: Crafty tends to think he and his web show are more famous than they are. Most people tend to mistake him for Dr. Insano or other villainous fictional doctors, a misconception that offends Crafty greatly. Even though Nurse admits Crafty's not exactly a household name, he thinks that everyone will soon recognize him aside from just being "that guy who does Linkara's title cards."
  • Sore Loser: He just couldn't accept Yugi was defeated by Sakura in their Death Debate and claimed himself the winner by default, just so he and Nurse wouldn't be tied.
  • Spiky Hair: His current hairstyle, fitting in with the Mad Scientist look. It was revealed in a flashback in "I Need a Hero Academia" that his hair became this way while reviving Nurse. He mishandled his makeshift defibrillator and shocked himself, causing his hair to billow out and refuse to relax ever since.
  • Suspiciously Specific Denial: In "All Grown Up," Crafty indirectly lets it slip that he watches Glee. A shocked Darksilvania asks to confirm what he just heard, but Crafty declines with a peculiar excuse:
    Crafty: "What? No! Of course not! I just... watch it for the commercials in between!"
  • Third Eye: Crafty has a concealed third eye, one that appears right before he finishes off Bakura in "The Foreshadow Game." As "I Need a Hero Academia" reveals, it's because he has the Infinium Heart within him, and the eye appears whenever he taps into its power.
  • Token Evil Teammate: Downplayed as he's not exactly that evil, but he the only member of the cast who's proud of being a self-proclaimed supervillain.
  • Too Dumb to Live: In "Aqua Marina," He makes several bad ink puns despite knowing full well that Nurse would hurt him for doing so. At that moment, his worst decision is repeatedly singing "ink" in time with the musical buildup and payoff of Tommy Walker's "Charge..." right after Nurse beat the hell out of him. And she continues beating him up over the puns he continues to crack throughout the episode.
  • Took a Level in Badass: From "The Foreshadow Game" onward, Crafty's a little more willing to participate in fights. Thanks to the combined efforts of Sasha and the co-hosts, he was able to defeat Ring Nurse in a completely one-sided battle, thus boosting his confidence on that front greatly.
  • Took a Level in Kindness: After a massive wake-up call from Sasha in "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped," Crafty realizes how big a jerk he's been to his cohosts, who he very quickly starts regarding as friends. Thus, he apologizes to Nurse for how he's acted, and since then, he's made a conscious effort to be nicer to everyone. Notably, he stops going out of his way to provoke Nurse (for example, he ceases the fat jokes altogether), becomes more patient and praiseful towards Pepper, and even bonds with Messibelle like a father to his daughter. And in general, he's much quicker to apologize for his mistakes.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: According to Curious Cat, McDonald's.
  • Trauma Button: The mere mention of his old life-drawing class in "New Season, New Friends" causes him to fearfully flashback to seeing a naked model. The same reaction returns in "Bikini Bodies" because Nurse unknowingly mentions the trigger again. Both times, the issue is Played for Laughs.
  • The Wonka: Throughout the series, Crafty's weirdness is a perennial talking point, especially for Nurse. He pathologically adheres to a villainous aesthetic, complete with a hammy, egotistical, assertive persona, to fulfill an unending power-fantasy — and this is even after he became outwardly nicer in Season 3. He knows almost anything and everything about popular culture and whatever he finds cool, but he sometimes skimps out on common sense and practical knowledge. To wit, he can be reckless with money, prioritize materialistic things, and put himself in unnecessary danger. These traits combined give him fairly questionable chemistry with just about anyone. And yet, as "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped" highlights, Dr. Crafty seems reasonably successful in-universe. Crafty himself has amassed a team of skilled co-hosts and an even bigger behind-the-scenes staff — thanks to all their efforts, the show has four seasons to its name. It helps that, though he doesn't see himself this way, Crafty truly is a decent person. At the end of the day, it's his heart that keeps the show growing and staying together.

    Nurse Worse 
Nurse Worse, AKA Greta Franzisca Wunderwurse
"This bulk isn't just for show, y'know. It's what keeps the show together!"
Voiced by: Megami33

A Frankenstein's Monster-esque girl reanimated and revived, Nurse Worse is Crafty's short, stout, yet strong right-hand woman, and the main co-host of the Dr. Crafty series. She tends to give drawing tips frequently, often proving to be more knowledgeable than Crafty himself. Although her patience occasionally wanes with his constant oblivious attitude, Nurse Worse has no trouble indulging in the fun that Crafty's antics provide. Her past is also shrouded in mystery, with her memory only extending as far as when Crafty brought her back to life.

Nurse Worse's final design was established by Alex, then finalized by his wife.

  • Acrofatic: Despite her plumpness, Nurse is quite agile and limber as a result of her frequent exercise regimen. This is notably demonstrated in the 6th Patreon episode "Now It's S(he)Hulk Time!" when Nurse is working out to a She-Hulk exercise video and doing particularly difficult stretches such as pulling her leg up to the top of her head.
  • Action Girl: She has the best fighting ability out of all the characters, as many unfortunate victims would attest to. For this reason, Crafty almost always calls upon her to deal with any unwanted guests, something "I Need a Hero Academia" celebrates when Nurse finally breaks free and comes to Crafty's rescue.
  • Ambiguously Brown: Her original human appearance has tanned skin, but it's not entirely clear what ethnicity she truly is, especially with her German-sounding real name.
  • Anguished Declaration of Love: In Episode 51, she softly says to Crafty that she loves him. Crafty didn't catch what she said and asked her to repeat it, but she denied saying anything, and she proceeds to punch Crafty in the face.
  • Apocalypse Maiden: As part of Mindstein's plans, she was destined to harness the powers of the Infinia through her Heart, becoming the tool needed for Mindstein to conquer the universe in the name of science.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance: The bolts placed across Nurse's body are proportioned like modern Tesla coils, with wide heads and skinny bodies. How fitting for someone addicted to electricity like a drug. "I Need A Hero Academia" reveals that the bolts also act like actual coils; they help generate the electrical energy that powers her up.
  • Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny!: In "Super Fighting Monsters! MEGAMON," she gets distracted by the diamonds on Mega-Steelix's body, requiring Crafty and Darksilvania to chase her down and get her back on track.
  • Badass Adorable: She's cute, quirky, and very skilled at hand-to-hand combat.
  • Badass in Distress: Her predicament in the finale arc "I Need a Hero Academia." While a capable fighter in her own right, a plotted-out surprise attack — in combination with her freezing in fear — led to Mindstein capturing her. And since the evil doctor knew Nurse could fight back, she created a machine specifically made to restrain her and prevent escape attempts. And just to prove she wasn't completely helpless in this situation, she managed to escape by tapping into the power of her Infinium Heart, breaking free and kicking ass once more.
  • Bathing Beauty: Nurse takes multiple formaldehyde baths a day (since, well, she's a patchwork made of dead body parts and the formaldehyde prevents her from rotting). She has appeared with just a towel on more than once.
  • Berserk Button:
    • Certain things Crafty does — like using his d20 die against her, interrupting her, and calling his Rhino Fakémon a donkey — are enough to make Nurse go ballistic, though this was heavily toned down after Season 2.
    • In an example not related to Crafty, she gets furious when talking about people who draw unrealistic breasts.
  • Beware the Nice Ones: There's no doubt that Nurse Worse is as cheerful and kind-hearted as a Cute Monster Girl can be, but if you interrupt her one too many times or so much as threaten to harm her friends, she won't hesitate to unleash her more "Monster Girl" side.
  • Big Beautiful Woman: Nurse Worse is quite hefty but is no less attractive for it, mismatched green skin aside.
    • Her weight is first acknowledged twenty episodes in, as a reason for her not being affected by the cold.
  • Big Eater: According to Crystelle, Nurse devours dozens of double-A batteries daily.
  • Big Fun: The "Big" part was already a given, and the "Fun" part comes from her bright and cheerful personality.
  • Break the Cutie: Once her Repressed Memories of her mother Mindstein were brought back by Bill Cipher invading her mind, she broke out into terrified tears because of all the terror inflicted on her. And that continued to happen during the Season 3 Finale arc, as she got to experience Mindstein's evil firsthand.
  • But She Sounds Wonderful: Nurse's VA, Megami33, is a diegetic presence on the show. Whenever she comes up in conversation, especially during "Dragon! Mock the Dragon!" where Team Four Star is brought up, Nurse has nothing but praise for her.
  • Cannot Spit It Out: While she has a crush on Crafty, she's afraid to admit it to the others. Messibelle is the only one who knows Nurse's true feelings for him.
  • Catchphrase: A probable one is "Here's a useful tip!"
  • Cloudcuckoolander's Minder: While she has her own eccentricities, Nurse usually has to help keep Crafty on track. She's quick to reprimand him for stepping way out of line, and she's also very useful for getting him out of any trouble he encounters. She mentions in "Going Poster" that these are some of the main reasons she's part of the Crafty Crew, and succeeding episodes demonstrate how, despite getting annoyed by Crafty occasionally, she wouldn't have it any other way.
  • Clingy Jealous Girl: By "New Season, New Friends," Nurse is very content being the show's only co-host — it keeps her close to Crafty, who she has a huge crush on. She's none-too-pleased with Pepper and Messibelle's introduction in the same episode, especially the former, who immediately draws her ire due to some superficial similarities they share. Not wanting to be outshone, Nurse makes a point to assert herself as the show's "best girl." Thankfully, this behavior didn't last — her outlook on Pepper, in particular, did a total 180.
  • Cute Monster Girl: She's an adorable parody of Frankenstein's Monster.
    • She even called out this trope by name in Episode 28, citing it as the reason she's frequently objectified in commissioned artwork.
  • Cuteness Proximity: She reacted this way upon seeing Crafty's Fakémon starters. And while she was initially disappointed with getting the Water-Type, she grew to love it because it was so cute.
  • Deer in the Headlights: Thanks to Bill Cipher unearthing repressed memories about Mindstein, this led to her freezing during the latter's surprise attack, and getting captured without any resistance.
  • Emotional Bruiser: She's an exceptional bare-handed brawler, but Nurse is also an openly cheerful and sensitive person. As "I Need a Hero Academia" demonstrates, she invokes this trope on another level — her power output is directly tied to her emotions, thanks to her Infinium Heart replica. If a loved one is in critical danger, her heart will kick into overdrive and overflow her with energy.
  • Fat and Proud: By "Dumb Dingies," Nurse has grown more comfortable with her weight thanks to her popularity with fans. Doesn’t stop Crafty from making fat jokes at her expense, though.
  • Fat and Skinny: Nurse is the fat to Crafty's skinny, and together, they are the most prominent representatives of the dichotomy on the show.
  • Fat Best Friend: Nurse Worse is quite plump and being Dr. Crafty's trusty assistant and co-host could qualify her as his best friend, though he might not admit it out loud.
  • Fear of Thunder: She doesn't like the lightning effects Crafty uses in his episodes. Doubles as an Ironic Fear considering what she uses electricity for...
  • Flesh Golem: Like her basis, Nurse Worse is comprised of multiple spare body parts of indeterminate origin, a quality demonstrated by the discolored patches across her body. Consequentially, she requires frequent formaldehyde baths to keep her body in top condition.
  • Genius Bruiser: Her brawn is matched by her brains, and she's got plenty of both to spare.
  • Genki Girl: She has her moments, especially whenever she's featured in an episode's artwork.
  • Golden Super Mode: Upon tapping into the power of the Infinium Heart, her bolts, eyes, and colored hair streaks all turn golden. And in this form she's powerful enough to take down a half-turned Screw, when it was already established that a quarter-turned Screw is a One-Woman Army.
  • G-Rated Drug: Nurse racks up high power bills by applying electricity to her bolts, excusing it as being for "medicinal purpose." Her addiction even got her banned from certain auto-part stores.
    • With Nurse dressing up as Sandy at the end of Episode 21, she is holding a battery in place of a cigarette.
    • In the first Patreon-sponsored episode, Nurse is unable to host the episode due to attending a meeting for "Electroholics Anonymous."
  • Given Name Reveal: Her real name is Greta, though she doesn't recognize it at first. By the time of the season 3 finale, she finally recalls it in full: Greta Franzisca Wunderwurse.
  • Gratuitous Japanese: She does this in Episode 30 right before JoJo punching Gilgamesh.
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: She tended to have this around Crafty in the earlier episodes, though she's since made amends with him and mellowed out. She's even gone on record saying these things don't annoy her anymore... because she's always annoyed.
  • Has a Type: If her lustful reactions to the Magician of Black Chaos and Crafty convey, her interest in men seems to fall under the Tall, Dark, and Handsome category.
  • The Heart: Whenever Crafty or the others are feeling terrible, she tries her best to listen to them and take care of them, no matter how hard it is. And as revealed by Crafty himself, she was the motivation that prevented him from attempting suicide again.
  • Hospital Hottie: Nurse Worse has been established as being quite gorgeous both in-universe and in real life.
  • Hyper-Competent Sidekick: She seems far more knowledgeable about the ins and outs of the art process than Crafty is.
  • Hypocritical Humor: On two separate occasions, she physically attacks Crafty for continuously making puns. Then caps it off with a pun of her own.
  • Identity Amnesia: Being revived by Colin gave her this side-effect, which he got around by coming up with her new name "Nurse Worse." However, she eventually gained her memories (and her confidence) back when she used the Infinium Heart to take down Screw.
  • I'll Be in My Bunk: She quotes this line verbatim when Crafty said she could write fan-fiction about him, and again when seeing an image of the Magician of Black Chaos.
  • Imagined Innuendo: Nurse gets aroused when the Sanderson Sisters talk about their desire to "eat" her, unaware that their true intention is they want to consume her body and soul.
  • It's All My Fault: She considered the events of "The Foreshadow Game" to be her fault, as she was the one that opened the package the Millennium Ring was in.
  • Jerkass Realization: The events of "The Foreshadow Game" revealed problems from Crafty's past that she didn't know, and it caused her to see him as more than a whiny manchild. As such, she's apologized for how she treated him in the past and vows to treat him with more respect and be a better friend.
  • "Just Joking" Justification: Nurse claimed the only way to purchase the alternate armors in Breath of the Wild was to sell Crafty's Nintendo Switch. This made Crafty angry until Nurse told him it was a joke.
  • Literally Shattered Lives: A non-fatal example, but a significant one nonetheless. As part of her backstory, she accidentally fell into an open grave running away from Mindstein, leaving her naked, in pieces, and covered in dirt and blood. Fortunately, Colin heard her cries for help and managed to repair her.
  • MacGuffin Super Person: As it turns out, a replica of the Infinium Heart was used in her construction. While not the true artifact, its power is still equal to its basis, which wasn't known to exist in a completed state during Nurse's creation. Mindstein intended the artifact be used as a power conduit to absorb the energies behind the Infinium Door, creating the perfect being.
  • M.D. Envy: She has a PhD in psychology, but is unsure if she should be called "Doctor Worse" because of it. Crafty shoots down that idea because he doesn't want to pay her a doctor's salary.
  • Meganekko: She wears glasses, and it just adds to her overall adorable appearance.
  • Megaton Punch: She delivers one to Screw after using the full extent of her power, sending her flying and leaving her incredibly damaged.
  • Morality Chain: To Doctor Crafty. Saving her from her old life and becoming close friends with her both played significant parts in why Crafty isn't either dead or a much worse person.
  • Non-Indicative Name: Despite her name, she seems reasonably competent at her job. Although, in the Season 3 premiere, Nurse invokes a subversion of the trope during her reflections during the time gap between seasons. She admits she had been "a terrible nurse and a worse friend," and she wishes to improve her character.
  • Not So Above It All: Despite normally being The Straight Man to Crafty's Cloud Cuckoolander, there are a few moments where it's the other way around. A prime example is when she wanted to use the electric shock machine from episode 41. When Crafty refused to let her have it, she acted like a child who's been denied sweets.
  • Nice Girl: No matter what happens, she'll always make sure to show kindness to her fellow co-hosts, even the ones who sometimes annoy her like Crafty and Messi.
  • Perverse Sexual Lust: She has a crush on Maleficent.
  • Pint-Sized Powerhouse: Due to the show's format, it's not obvious most of the time that Nurse is only five feet tall. This makes her one of the shortest characters in the cast, beaten only by Pickles. However, her power is immense. She's the resident fighter of the Crafty Crew, quite a successful one at that. And, as "I Need a Hero Academia" reveals, she runs off of an Infinium Heart, which makes her even more powerful when Nurse is placed under sufficient stress.
  • Rage Breaking Point: Crafty is constantly annoying or frustrating her, but it takes thirteen episodes for him to prompt her into physically attacking him.
  • Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: The fourth Chara-Cafe shows that when confronted by several Drop-In Characters invading the lab, she just backs away slowly and leaves.
  • Shameless Fanservice Girl: Downplayed as she has a little shame in being depicted in sexual content, particularly when Crafty draws it, but seeing herself in Not Safe for Work fan-art is still a guilty pleasure for her.
  • Silent Treatment: She gave this to Crafty in Episode 29 due to him constantly interrupting Nurse.
  • Smart People Wear Glasses: Nurse wears a rounded pair of glasses almost all the time, and she's generally the go-to hostess for drawing advice and interesting trivia. She also has a PhD in Psychology and an enduring interest in biology.
  • Stout Strength: Nurse has a heavyweight Olympic weightlifter physique — big and bulky, not just due to fat, but underlying muscle. True to form, she frequently works out and knows how to throw a decent JoJo Punch.
  • Talk to the Fist: Whenever Crafty annoys or insults Nurse too much, she doesn't hesitate to take a swing at him. This is especially true during Season 2, after which Nurse realizes she was going too far. She's since reeled back her aggression, with it now taking much more to coax such a reaction out of her.
  • Territorial Smurfette: In Season 2's premiere, "New Season, New Friends," Crafty introduces two new co-hosts to help with his spin-off segments: Pepper and Messibelle. To Nurse's dismay, both are young women around her age, and she spends the episode noticeably upset about their presence. Her ire is especially directed at Pepper due to their physical similarities. Once Pepper's promotional art is finished and she's out of earshot, Nurse cruelly suggests that she and Crafty have calamari for dinner after Nurse slips on Pepper's (clearly unintended) ink puddle. Thankfully, Nurse abandons this behavior and befriends both Pepper and Messibelle. She becomes invested in both Pepper's well-being and strange biology, giving her encouragement and comfort when she needs it and studying her very thoroughly. Nurse also becomes sort of a big sister figure for Messibelle, despite occasionally getting annoyed by Messi's sex drive.
  • Theme Naming: Her real name is Greta and her sister's name is Hazel. Does that sound familiar to you? The reference extends past the names, too, with Mindstein easily fulfilling the role of the witch. Also, both women are heavyset, like they've been kept well-fed.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: According to Curious Cat, battery acid.
  • Trophy Child: In a more fantastical use of the trope, Nurse was born and raised to be Mindstein's greatest scientific achievement: an artificial goddess infused with Infinium technology. "The Foreshadow Game" and various moments throughout season 3 emphasize Mindstein's disinterest in raising Nurse — rather, she'd just experiment upon her daughter in the most painful, non-lethal ways she can manage. In response, Nurse eventually escaped her torturous living situation, and she blocked out those memories as best she could.
  • Took a Level in Jerkass: In Season 2, Nurse takes a somewhat nasty turn. While she tries to maintain her kindhearted disposition, she's quick to lose her temper and make surprisingly bitter remarks, indirectly or not. She also becomes especially hostile towards Crafty, even flat out attacking him for mostly petty reasons. The most prominent example is "Aqua Marina," where Crafty makes one too many ink puns until Nurse pummels him into silence. "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped" has her reflect on her behavior; she concludes she was too cruel and seeks to improve herself, which she starts by personally apologizing to Crafty.
  • Took a Level in Kindness: During the show's inactive months leading up to Season 3, Nurse had ample time to reflect on her vitriolic behavior across Season 2, and by "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped," she sets out to make amends. As Season 3 progresses, she becomes more patient and accommodating towards her coworkers, Crafty in particular. While she still has no issue disciplining Crafty when he gets out of hand, her approach is more restrained; similarly, her snarkiness becomes more playful. She also becomes nicer to Pepper, who she regarded with one-sided disdain in her debut, "New Season, New Friends," over very superficial reasons. By Season 3, episodes like "The Art of the Con(vention)" and "Going Poster" showcase the two women's strong, mutually supportive friendship.
  • Undying Loyalty: No matter how annoyed she gets by his antics, Nurse will always stay by Crafty's side. Nurse claims as much in "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped," and from that point forward, her bond with him grows even stronger. Presumably, her loyalty is birthed from her crush on Crafty, but "I Need a Hero Academia" reveals a reason that runs much deeper than that: Crafty saved her life. He not only reassembled her from a nasty fall, but he unknowingly rescued her from an abusive household. She hadn't remembered the true reason behind her loyalty because she had blocked out many of her memories. Her abuser, Dr. Mindstein, resurfaces those memories in the present day. The revelation cements Nurse's devotion to Crafty, especially after she spent the entire season up to that point improving her relationship with him.
  • Virgin Power: In "Hocus Mansion," She's able to summon the Sanderson Sisters by lighting the Black Flame Candle. When Crafty asked if she was a virgin after he failed to light the candle, she embarrassingly responds that it's none of his business.
  • Vocal Evolution: In her official debut, "The Worst Nurse," Nurse's voice was much closer to Megami33's natural cadence, while also bearing the slightest hint of a British accent. However, Megami33 soon exchanged the accent for a slightly higher, peppier voice for Nurse.
  • Wolf Whistle: Nurse is unknowingly on the receiving end of one by Bill Cipher upon finding a specific memory of her from Episode 21 "Grease Frightening" dressed as Sandy.
  • Workout Fanservice: Gets this treatment in the She-Hulk Patreon episode, showing off her generous curves in the process of stretching to a She-Hulk workout video. As usual, Crafty responds with utter obliviousness.
  • You Are Fat: She was often insulted this way by Crafty throughout the series until he stopped out of respect for her friendship in "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped." In "Hocus Mansion", Nurse is subjected to this as well as I'm a Humanitarian by the Sanderson Sisters who not only gleefully call Nurse "plump and juicy", (with her only inches away), but also jab that Nurse's body will keep them fed for centuries.

Spin-Off Hosts

    Pepper & Pickles 
"I-I'm mostly known as "the Octo-Chef". E-Even though that tends to be my alias nowadays..."
Click to see her and Pickles when outside the Dr. Crafty series 
Voiced by: Katy Johnson

A highly-reserved chef with life experience to spare, Pepper is a humanoid cephalopod mutant who was introduced in Season 2 as the co-host for the first of Dr. Crafty's spin-off serieses; Crafty's Chara-Café. She is considered the most kind-hearted of the cast, as her commentary appears more gentle and encouraging than the other co-hosts. While this causes Pepper to have difficulty maintaining discussions due to the show's sense of humor, her world knowledge more than makes up for it, thanks to her perpetual travels as a nomad before being hired into Crafty Industries.

Pepper and Pickles were created by Blue-Paint-Sea, an artist who also created several assets for the show. Notably, they have developed Pepper and Pickles even further on their Deviant Art page. It's been confirmed that anything they do with the characters is canon to the show, so tropes involving Blue-Paint-Sea's pieces will appear here.

  • Adaptational Curves: Blue-Paint-Sea's artwork of Pepper makes her quite a bit fatter all around. These chubbier assets tend to be presented in aesthetically pleasing ways.
  • Ambiguous Situation: She's unsure whether she's more human or octopus, and she also doesn't know if she has Zora or Octarian DNA. It turns out her DNA, in general, accounts for several other sea creatures as well — which ones specifically are discovered gradually, as a Running Gag.
  • Apologises a Lot: If she feels she's done something wrong, Pepper apologizes profusely. Take her debut, "New Season, New Friends," where she lets loose some ink on the floor and Nurse slips on the resulting puddle:
    "Oh gosh! Oh gosh! I'm so-so-so-so sorry!"
  • Asexuality: Pepper reveals in "Ad-ORC-able!" that she's asexual. Specifically, she's gray-ace with an extremely slight romantic streak — as the description of this reference sheet explains, while Pepper can experience romantic attraction, she seldom acts upon it. The joys of cooking are more than enough for her. Still, should the need arise, she'll happily experience romance vicariously; "Going Poster" and "Pirates Vs Doctors" both imply that she enjoys love stories a ton.
  • Art Evolution:
    • Blue-Paint-Sea went on to simplify certain elements of Pepper's design. The most prominent changes were made to her hip tentacles — they were thinned out to match her head tentacles' proportions, but to keep them distinct, they're now conjoined by webs of skin, which maintains their resemblance to a skirt. The green portions of her design were redistributed to emphasize her yellow skin, as well. The Dr. Crafty Quickie "Pepper Motion Plus" showcases an Early-Bird Cameo of Pepper's Season 4 promotional artwork. It reveals that Alex has consolidated some of these changes into his own take on Pepper's design.
    • Starting with "We're Back! A Crafty Story," Pepper's expression set became scaled up slightly. This makes her height above most everyone else more apparent.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance:
    • Pepper has a ribbon wrapped around her mantle. This combination evokes the idea that she's tied her hair back, which is a good practice among cooks with long hair. Her Dr. Crafty design even has her wearing the mantle like an upward ponytail.
    • Everything below Pepper's shoulders creates the vague, slightly exaggerated likeness of an octopus. Counting her legs, she has eight tentacles that all merge into a bulky mantle — her belly — complete with protruding eye sockets — her breasts.
  • Awesome, but Impractical: Octo-bloat grants Pepper profound defense utility, but it's difficult for her to maintain, let alone set up. Another drawback is that the ability sometimes activates at inopportune moments, as shown in "A MERMAID MELODY FANDUB," where Pepper reflexively balloons twice after being startled.
  • Balloon Belly:
    • Being such a Big Eater, Pepper's prone to bloating up. Her food babies hardly come up on the show, but they occasionally happen in Blue-Paint-Sea's pieces, such as this one.
    • On Dr. Crafty, this trope manifests as her "Octo-Bloat" ability. Using air, ink, or water, she can inflate her belly and boost her defensive prowess. It's apparently rather difficult for her to use it voluntarily; more often, she balloons up accidentally when under sufficient stress, as seen in "A MERMAID MELODY FANDUB." The same episode demonstrates that, when expelled, the excess air can propel her forward with great force.
      • "GEMS! Truly Outrageous!" shows her using "Octo-Bloat" again. While the crew reinforces the castle against a potential riot, Nurse accidentally catches a very on-edge Pepper by surprise. The chef bloats abruptly, sending Nurse flying out of the kitchen.
  • Bare Your Midriff: Across all her outfits, her tops leave her navel and most of her belly exposed. Even her Crafty Industries attire, which covers her the most out of every option, exposes her love handles. This piece implies her exposed midriff is due to her wearing slightly under-sized clothing.
  • Berserk Button:
    • While her tolerance level is impressively high, "Pirates VS Doctors" reveals that she holds deep contempt for bullying. It's one of the few things that can induce her into going on the offensive, which is somewhat surprising for such a normally pacifistic character.
    • "The Foreshadow Game" demonstrates that she'll get frustrated if someone refers to anime as a "Japanese cartoon". However, she seems to have outgrown this viewpoint. It was partially motivated by her initial distaste for Western animation, but ever since then, her view on the medium has softened significantly.
  • Big Beautiful Woman: In tandem with being quite tall, Pepper is very fat — fatter than Nurse, even — with a large, doughy belly, very plump limbs, and a rounded face. She's consistently regarded as one of the most attractive characters on the show, in both personality and looks. The (in-universe) audience greets her with overwhelming applause during her debut and the Chara-Cafe's premiere, and the same audience showers her with Valentine candies in "Ad-ORC-Able!"
  • Big Eater: Due to being perpetually hungry, Pepper's absolutely gluttonous, something furthered by the euphoria she experiences from eating. Her eating habits are partially out of necessity; lacking a nose means she relies strictly on taste-testing to ensure her meals are correct.
    • In "Ad-ORC-Able," she receives some candy hearts in the mail and offers to share some with Crafty. She sheepishly admits that she could probably finish all the candy herself, including what she offered to Crafty — which is impressive because her candy stash completely fills up the kitchen.
  • Big Fun: While she's atypically reserved compared to other examples of this trope, Pepper still has a big, indulgent heart. Finding great happiness in eating food, she wishes to spread this joy to others through her cooking. She's also just as well-versed in pop culture as the other hosts.
  • Bizarre Alien Biology: Like a real octopus, she has a mantle. Instead of containing her vital organs, however, her mantle contains an ink sack and a water tank, the latter of which allows her to live on land.
  • Breakout Character: At first, Pepper and Pickles were initially just conceived for Dr. Crafty. However, their overwhelmingly positive reception and Blue-Paint-Sea's own enjoyment of the characters caused them to be fleshed out far beyond their presence on the show. Now, they're major characters in Blue-Paint-Sea's work, contributing hugely to another set of stories entirely.
  • Bring My Brown Pants: She involuntarily inks herself whenever she gets sufficiently nervous, something that Nurse finds out when she slips on her ink puddle in "New Season, New Friends." As she adjusted to the show's environment, this quirk was quickly superseded by her involuntary Octo-Bloating.
  • Can't Hold Her Liquor: Surprisingly enough for someone so big and indulgent, Pepper has a low alcohol tolerance. The trope is played with, however, in that she can't get drunk under normal circumstances — the alcohol just makes her very queasy. Consequentially, her ink develops an intense, wine-like taste.
  • Chameleon Camouflage: She can blend into her environment like a real octopus, although her clothes remain unaffected.
  • Character Tics: If she's particularly happy or content and her arms are unoccupied, Pepper holds her lower arms aloft, with her hands folded into gentle fists. It's a frequent sight between both Alex's and Blue-Paint-Sea's takes on her.
  • Chubby Chef: She's quite a heavy-set mutant, mostly due to her insatiable appetite and all the taste-testing she must perform. Crafty explained on a now-deleted Curious Cat question that this was the reason he knew Pepper would be a good chef, claiming it was "a gut feeling."
  • Cuteness Proximity: In "Dumb Dingies," whereas Messibelle's turned on by her chibi drawing, Pepper jumps for joy at how cute hers is.
  • The Cutie: The in-universe audience absolutely adores Pepper. It’s because, to complement her soft appearance, she has a soft personality. She's never seen apart from Pickles, her pet and best friend, and her whole motivation for becoming a chef is to make other people happy. She also has an almost motherly disposition, easily being the gentlest and most understanding of the Crafty Crew.
  • The Confidant: As they grow acquainted with each other, Messibelle starts turning to Pepper whenever something serious is on her mind. Seeing as the former has so little life experience compared to the latter, combined with the latter's gentle nature, it's no wonder why Messi views her as approachable. For example, in "We're Back! A Crafty Story," Messi discovers a Journal in Crafty's possession, one that has a section dedicated to the Infinium relics. She immediately seeks out Pepper to discuss her disturbing findings; Pepper herself is quick to lend an ear.
  • Deadpan Snarker: To the surprise of everyone — even herself — there are a few times where Pepper has some mildly choice remarks for her companions. However, her immediate regret or her assurance that she's just playfully teasing undercuts them somewhat. It's best shown in "This is Crack(ship)," when Nurse asks if she ever watched Naruto. Pepper giggles a bit, then nonchalantly remarks that she only watches good anime. She tries to backpedal and apologize, but she only digs herself deeper when she outright calls Naruto trash.
  • Depending on the Artist: There are quite a few noticeable differences between Pepper's two major designs:
    • After Art Evolution took into effect, Alex tends to play with the number of tentacles around Pepper's hips in certain pieces. Typically, she's flanked by two sets of three tentacles on her left and right, which, combined with her legs, gives her lower body a complete set of eight tentacles. On her Dr. Crafty model sheet, Alex added a ninth tentacle, which sprouts from Pepper's back like a tail. Other pieces of his sometimes add three more than that.
    • Pepper's mantle is another peculiarity; Alex has her wear it up as though it were a ponytail. It's also nearly twice its original size, and because she wears it up, it takes up a good chunk of her height. Consequentially, if she were to wear her mantle downward, she'd actually stand only a little over 6 feet tall. The original design, however, has Pepper wearing her much smaller mantle downward. Here, her height is capped off by the top of her skull. But she remains 7 feet tall, meaning her original design is a full head taller than the Crafty design.
  • Does Not Like Spam: The only thing she won't cook is seafood — not because she can't, but because she equates it to cannibalism. Being an octopus, Pepper naturally craves crab meat and shellfish once in a while, but she never gives in to her urges. More infrequently, she can't help but enjoy Seafood Fettuccine, even if she won't prepare it herself.
  • Dork in a Sweater: When off the clock, Pepper wears a pink sweater with puffy sleeves. It complements her social awkwardness and her gentle, sweet personality all at once.
  • Endearingly Dorky: She perpetually struggles to keep up with the show's eccentricities, sometimes stumbling a bit when she tries to contribute herself. Yet, she's also immensely sweet, sincere, and practical. All these traits have endeared Pepper to Crafty, the rest of the crew, and even the in-universe audience, whose members unanimously cheer her on in "New Season, New Friends" and "Salt and Pepper." For these reasons, "Ad-ORC-Able" would later reveal that Pepper has accrued a mountain of admirers, each of them overwhelming her with Valentine's requests and candy.
  • Establishing Character Moment: The first time we see Pepper in the Season 2 Update Video, she's hiding behind Crafty and acts embarrassed after he introduces her.
  • Expy:
    • Pepper takes inspiration from both Marina and Fluttershy.
      • Like Marina, Pepper is a humanoid octopus who is associated with the color green. Their eyebrows tend to be downturned by default, and they both have long, draping tentacle hair. Both traits help reflect their reserved and sweet-natured personalities. Both are also very tall among their respective casts, and their default outfits expose their bellies.
      • Pepper draws similar inspiration to Marina from Fluttershy, alongside her furious, zero-tolerance outlook on bullying. Additionally, this influence extends to Pepper's voice — it's very gentle and quiet, but not without enthusiasm. Word of God confirmed that Katy uses Fluttershy as a frame of reference for Pepper's voice.
    • Thanks to Author Appeal on Blue-Paint-Sea's part, Pepper and Pickles have quite a bit in common with Banjo and Kazooie: Both are inseparable pairs of animal friends who experience many zany misadventures, the smaller member prefers to take refuge somewhere on their larger companion (be it Pepper's hair or Banjo's backpack), and both duos have a member who's personality contrasts with their partner (Pepper and Banjo are kindhearted, easy-going and level-headed, while Pickles and Kazooie tend to be snarky, quick-witted, and combative).
  • Eye Take: Some of Pepper's most common poses give her a dumbfounded expression, with wide eyes and shrunken pupils. They're commonly made in reaction to Dr. Crafty's daily weirdness. They appear more frequently than anyone else's similar poses, due to how low-key Pepper is as a person compared to the show.
  • Fat and Proud: She would never admit it outright, especially since she still holds some embarrassment over the matter, but there's a part of Pepper that enjoys how chubby she is. This piece shows her caressing her belly and admiring its doughiness. Also, when describing her physical exams with Nurse in the third Chara-Cafe episode, Pepper blushes — she likes having her belly touched.
  • Fish Person: Pepper's an anthropomorphic octopus, and her genes account for an untold number of other sea creatures.
  • Foil: Pepper serves as a distinct counterpart to Messibelle, the other cohost introduced in Season 2. Messi can be crass and is decidedly extroverted, while Pepper tends to be well-mannered and introverted. Meanwhile, whereas Messi is homosexual and incredibly lecherous (even after she toned things down later on), Pepper is grey-asexual and doesn't act on her romantic feelings. Ironically, despite the adult edge to Messi's character, Pepper carries significantly more life experience by comparison. This is because Pepper was a seasoned nomad before settling down at Crafty's, whereas Messi was born only a few days before her debut appearance and has barely ventured beyond the castle. As a consequence, Pepper exhibits some motherly tendencies, while Messi exhibits some childish tendencies, a contrast that is occasionally highlighted in their interactions.
  • Form-Fitting Wardrobe: All of her outfits highlight her generous curves. Thanks to her belly's motions, the hems of her tops tend to lift and expose her navel, often without her knowledge. It's justified because, being tall and wide, it's difficult to find clothing tailored for her size.
  • Gentle Giant: Like Nurse, Pepper's height can be hard to discern during a typical Dr. Crafty episode. She is in fact 7'4'', being the biggest of the protagonists in height and weight. However, there's not a mean bone in her body; if anything, she's immensely caring, accommodating, and affectionate.
  • Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Notably, despite Dr. Crafty's lenience on low-tier vulgarity, Pepper never swears, even using "gosh" where appropriate. The same goes for her appearances in Blue-Paint-Sea's work.
  • Grew a Spine: Starting with Season 3, her timid nature was toned down while her confidence was boosted. While she remains soft-spoken, she's far less camera-shy than she used to be and even stood up for herself on a few occasions, including being instrumental in Mindstein's defeat.
  • Growling Gut: Due to her body carrying so much water, ink, and food, Pepper’s stomach tends to make plenty of gastrointestinal sounds. It can be from hunger or digestive growls, her midriff being compressed/squeezed, or even when she's walking or running thanks to how easily her body bounces and jiggles. Amusingly, her belly growls perpetually, but one would need to be very close to Pepper in order to hear it.
    • In "Magic Kingdom Mania" her belly audibly grumbles — not due to hunger, but out of disgust for Crafty's convoluted carnival idea, where people eat Pepper's food, get on a ride that makes them sick and regurgitate it, then immediately come back to Pepper for more.
  • I Am Not Pretty: It's implied now and then that Pepper has some body-image issues. When offered a diminutive bikini top in "The Beachles," Pepper admits that she doesn't want people to stare at her while she wears it. Messibelle looks upon the top with utter glee. Later in the episode, she practically orgasms when she overhears Nurse's observations of Pepper's body. "Ad-ORC-Able" later reveals that Pepper's received tons of unwanted romantic attention.
  • I Have Boobs, You Must Obey!: Some part of Pepper recognizes that bigger is often better, so to speak. In one of Blue-Paint-Sea's pieces, she flaunts her breasts on social media to help generate interest in a friend's business. The description mentions how Pepper is only slightly oblivious to how appealing her chest is.
  • Jiggle Physics: Because of her soft stretchy skin, flexibility, and all the fluid she retains, Pepper's body jiggles fairly easily whenever she moves. Combined with how audible her belly can get when it bounces, she often finds it embarrassing when wandering through public areas.
  • Mundane Utility:
    • She never really uses her ink for defensive purposes. Instead, she uses it as ingredients in her cooking.
    • Her tentacles — both sets, on her head and around her hips — are very practical for multi-tasking while cooking and serving food.
  • Mysterious Past: In "The Art of the Con(vention)," Crafty decides to ask Pepper about her past before he found her at the Fish'n'Fish. Curiously, Pepper draws a blank. She can only recall the most basic details, that she was a nomadic chef who was frequently short on cash. Supplementary details reveal that she became a notable figure in various culinary circles worldwide, but that information can only help so much. The mystery motivates Nurse to research Pepper extensively. She's not only intrigued by her anatomy, but she hopes her efforts will help Pepper reconcile with that missing knowledge.
  • Nice Girl: Despite her shy demeanor, she treats everyone around her with kindness and respect.
  • Non-Standard Character Design: Among the spin-off cohosts, Pepper is the only one who adheres directly to the Crafty Crew's green-pink color scheme. Every succeeding co-host's color scheme represents only one of the two colors and deviates from there. This distinction is discussed plainly in "La Lamia, Do Doo Do Doo Doo," where Crafty explains how Pepper was designed before those color deviations were commonplace.
  • The Noseless: She doesn't have a nose, requiring her to taste-test everything she cooks.
  • Not Quite Flight: She can launch herself into the air by coiling her legs and shooting a stream of ink below her. It was initially based on the Super Jump of Splatoon, but the ability is also reminiscent of how squids escape their predators in the same way.
  • Occidental Otaku: She enjoys watching anime (well, good anime), so much so that she gets frustrated whenever someone compares them to Western cartoons in any way. While she eventually grew to like Western cartoons as well, she prefers watching anime instead.
  • Punny Name: Pepper and Pickles' names loosely reference the term "Pickled Peppers" when paired together. Pepper's name alone invites the others to make puns based around it.
  • Pursue the Dream Job: Played with. Long before joining Crafty, Pepper was actually an accomplished traveling chef. She worked in various places around the world so she could learn a plethora of cultural culinary techniques. Unfortunately, this nomadic approach tended to yield undesirable results. At one point, she ended up becoming a waitress at a seafood joint, where she was singled out for being the only monster-girl in the staff. Thanks to the discomfort this caused, she instantly took the chance to leave once Crafty made a deal, and she seems to be here to stay this time.
  • Reluctant Fanservice Girl: In "The Beachles," Pepper tacitly refuses to wear her swimsuit — a laughably undersized bikini top — thinking it would draw too much attention to herself. However, In the next episode, "Dumb Dingies," she's back in the comfort of the castle. There, she feels free to express her love over a developing chibi drawing of her, where she's wearing the same outfit.
  • Required Secondary Powers:
    • Pepper's capable of some pretty impressive squashing and stretching. However, her ability to do so is limited compared to other octopi; this limitation is necessary to maintain her humanoid figure. This compilation piece shows the extent of this ability, with one sketch of her crammed into a very narrow crevice for someone of her size. Her discomforted expression implies this is the most distortion she can handle.
    • The reason Pepper can survive on land at all is thanks to the water tank in her mantle. Presumably, she refuels it just by staying hydrated with drinks, as a human would.
  • Serious Business: She takes table manners very seriously.
  • Shrinking Violet: She's rather shy, and in her first appearances, she usually takes a while before appearing on camera. Occasionally, she stands further away from the camera so Crafty can be the main focus, such as in the introduction for "Send in the Clowns."
  • Statuesque Stunner: She stands at over seven feet, making her the tallest of the hosts. Her chief appeal stems from how utterly adorable she is, in tandem with being immensely curvy.
  • Stock Animal Behavior: Being an octopus, Pepper can produce ink, squeeze her bulky frame into tight crevices, use camouflage, and make liberal use of her many tentacles for problem-solving.
  • Super Senses: Turns out she's also part whale and can use echolocation. This was discovered during "I Need a Hero Academia," where she and Kyoka Jiro combine their powers to locate Mindstein's exact location, allowing Messi to restrain her with her stretchy arms.
  • Supreme Chef: Crafty absolutely struck gold when he hired Pepper. Thanks to her globe-spanning travels, she has some expansive cooking knowledge. As this poster demonstrates, she knows how to prepare very specific meals for the likes of Nurse Worse and Messibelle, who feed on electricity and cleaning products, respectively — and they're evidently enjoying them. In addition, Pepper's many tentacles allow her to cook several great-quality meals at once. Sometimes, this renders her a bit accident-prone, but overall, her skills are simply too good to pass up. The only thing she can't cook is seafood, and that's only due to her moral principles.
  • Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Nurse initially suspects that Crafty hired Pepper to replace her in "New Season, New Friends." The first impression didn't help — they're both kind-hearted, green-skinned, humanoid rubenesque monster women. However, past those superficial similarities, it soon becomes abundantly clear that they couldn't be more different. Nurse stands at 5 ft. tall and looks to be a mid-sized Big Beautiful Woman, while at 7 ft. and 4 inches, Pepper is larger than Nurse in height and weight. In terms of personality, Pepper is shy, quiet, and happy to work in her usual position, Nurse is out-going, talkative, and ready to host the show should Crafty be indisposed. Thus, Nurse no longer views Pepper in this light, becoming quite fond of her and her enigmatic biology and offering comfort and support when Pepper needs it.
  • Sweet Tooth: She really enjoys eating candy, even taking some of Crafty's after hers was stolen.
  • Team Chef: Crafty hired her so he'd stop having to eat Hot Pockets every night.
  • Team Mom: To the Crafty Crew and Blue-Paint-Sea's cast, Pepper has the sweet, mediating, and nurturing approach of many good mothers, all despite not actually being one.
    • Messibelle, the youngest of her coworkers, tends to consult her when something's on her mind for this reason. Some notable instances are the Season 3 premiere, where they discuss Nurse's complicated, possibly unreciprocated feelings for Crafty, and the Spin-Off Crossover. In the latter, when Messi breaks down sobbing due to missing Crafty, Pepper immediately rushes to her side and holds her. Messi doesn't object, even laying down in Pepper's lap as she cries. Pepper also tends to Crystelle in the same way, after Crystelle nearly goes catatonic from her visions of Disgustilda.
    • Meanwhile, among Blue-Paint-Sea's characters, this aspect of Pepper is highlighted in this piece. In the description. Blue-Paint-Sea explains that Blucy, the character tearfully embracing Pepper, never knew what having a mother was like until Pepper came into her life.
  • Tempting Fate: Poor Pepper tends to invoke the show's wackiness without even trying. If she audibly questions or doubts something, it's common for shenanigans to ensue — often with her as the butt of the joke. For example, in "A MERMAID MELODY FANDUB," she and Crafty muse about whether her genes contain Pufferfish DNA. She says she doubts it, but a loud noise startles her into bloating up. In the very next Chara-Cafe episode, she notices that everything has gone on without incident. Soon after, she's immediately accosted by Ryu and Ken, who then steal her Halloween candy (accidentally — they were targetting Crafty's stash).
  • Trademark Favorite Food: While she doesn't discriminate when it comes to meals, she has a particular taste for pasta. Also, her favorite fast food restaurant is Wendy's.
  • Unwanted False Faith: According to this piece's description, Pepper was mistaken for a goddess upon visiting Inkopolis for the first time. It's strongly implied this wasn't the kind of interaction she expected or wanted, but she still stuck around and adjusted to the city and its customs.
  • Victoria's Secret Compartment: The Chara-Cafe intro shows Pepper pulling a cooking ingredient out of her bosom.
  • Wardrobe Malfunction: According to Word of God, the main reason why Pepper doesn't wear pants is not due to her size or weight, but rather her thigh tentacles prevent her from pulling any kind of clothing up to her waist. Because of this, leggings tend to be Pepper's substitute for pants.
  • Weight Woe: Pepper's chubby and rather self-conscious. Some of it isn't strictly due to her weight, which she sometimes appreciates; her tendency to jiggle uncontrollably, the sloshing sounds her belly makes, and just being a monster girl make her uncomfortable being in the spotlight.
  • Yank the Dog's Chain: Pepper spends much of Season 3 operating without an oven before finally receiving one in "I'MA VAMPIRE!" From then on, she barely has time to use it; a handful of episodes later, the Season 3 finale sees her locked up and unable to cook for a long few days. And after the Season 3 finale, a troupe of animals wrecks the oven as they rampage about the kitchen in "La Lamia, Do Doo Do Doo Doo."

A sea cucumber capable of living on dry land, Pickles is Pepper's small yet nimble traveling companion who is always seen riding somewhere on her body. He was introduced alongside Pepper in Season 2's premiere and sometimes partakes in an episode's commentary whenever Pepper is on-screen. While infrequent, the times Pickles voices his opinions demonstrate that he may be smarter than the cast gives him credit for.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance: Pickle's lengthy tongue evokes a regular sea cucumber's expelled Cuvierian tubules... which come out of their anuses. While that's definitely Pickles' mouth and tongue we're looking at, his raspberrying still makes a ton of sense due to this trait.
  • Blood Knight: When confronted with a combat situation, Pickles is quick to urge Pepper to engage alongside him. This trait shows up during the Spinoff Crossover when the co-hosts discuss how they can escape their prison. Pickles immediately, aggressively suggests that Pepper perform something so violently powerful that she refuses to perform it again.
  • Empathy Pet: Whatever Pepper is feeling at the moment, Pickles will mirror her emotions as much as he realistically can.
  • Hidden Depths: It's strongly implied that Pickles is quite a bit smarter than he seems. A single raspberry he makes during "Salt and Pepper" leaves Pepper awestruck:
    Pepper: "Wow... that's deep, Pickles."
  • Intelligible Unintelligible: Despite speaking strictly through raspberries, the other characters can understand Pickles just fine. According to Pepper, Pickles can be surprisingly profound.
  • Meaningful Name: Pickles looks exactly like his namesake. In fact, considering what a pickle is — a fermented cucumber — Pickles is also A Dog Named "Dog", in a roundabout way.
  • Parrot Pet Position: Pickles typically rides Pepper's shoulders or head, poking out from beneath her tentacles.
  • Ridiculously Cute Critter: As if Pepper wasn't adorable enough, Pickles contributes to the adorableness with his small, friendly face and tendency to mimic Pepper's facial expressions.
  • The Unintelligible: Pickles is only able to communicate by blowing raspberries, although everyone seems to understand what he's saying.

"Did someone say 'Bath~?'"
Voiced by: ToxicSoul77

Born within the pipe system of Crafty's lair, Messibelle is an energetic and lecherous amalgamation of cleaning products who managed to morph into a young slime girl. She was introduced in Season 2 to be the co-host for the Dr. Crafty spin-off series; Crafty's Top Ten Tub, shortly after being created by Crafty himself (being the one who dumped said cleaning products down the castle drains in the first place). This not only makes her the youngest of the Crafty cast but also, by all accounts; Crafty's surrogate daughter. She has an off-beat style of commentary that is somewhat similar to Crafty’s own, though many of her contributions are motivated by lust, occasional naivety, or other strange trains of thought. Because of this, her comments even catch Crafty off-guard at times.

Messibelle was designed by Scribbled-Death, an artist who created some assets for the show. Their original concept art for her can be found in this screenshot from "New Season, New Friends", during which it flashes onscreen for a split second. Currently, this is the only method to view Messibelle's original design, as the file that includes it has yet to be posted publicly.

  • Animal Motifs: Messibelle's design evokes snails in some subtle ways. Aside from her snail shell bonnet, she's a cleaning lady in much the same way a snail is a scavenger — a creature that provides natural sanitation for its environment. She also leaves slime trails behind her, much like snails leave behind mucus whenever they move. In pre-production, her design used to have a gastropod-like foot instead of legs.
  • Anything That Moves: When it comes to showing her affection to women, she certainly doesn't discriminate. The first Top 10 episode has her drooling over a demoness, a cyclops, and a spider woman, just to name a few examples.
    • The very next episode shows that not even Pokémon are safe from her lustful gaze, as seen through her flirting with Tsareena. She does have standards, though, as she reacts with clear disgust to drag queens.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance:
    • Messi's bonnet resembles a snail's shell; much like snails, she tends to leave slime trails behind her whenever she moves.
    • The way Messi's slime dress drapes down onto the floor evokes a gastropod's foot, continuing the snail-theming in her design.
    • Because the slime dress is technically a part of her, she's effectively naked from the waist down — how appropriate for someone so lewd.
  • Badass Adorable: She may not be as combat-capable as Nurse, but Messibelle nonetheless knows how to throw down — especially with her mop and stretchiness.
  • Berserk Button: "Couples" reveals that the very concept of Stockholm Syndrome angers her to no end. The mere mention of it causes her to go into a rant with some surprisingly harsh comments towards anyone who believes in the concept.
  • Big Eater: She's not as gourmandizing as Pepper, but Messi still has quite an appetite. She admits in "Couples" that she celebrates Valentine's day by gorging on ice cream, and she happily snacks on a surplus of Girl Scout thin mints that piled on Crafty in "Funniest Characters." After a cut, the entire stash is gone; it's not hard to imagine that she emptied every single box.
  • Brilliant, but Lazy: She's not usually lazy when it comes to cleaning — in fact, Messi's very good at her job, despite her occasional exasperation. However, if someone's conveniently around to help her clean... well, Messi lets them do all the work, as Pepper finds out in "Going Poster."
  • Broomstick Quarterstaff: She's frequently depicted using a mop as a weapon, and she can swing it hard enough to send things flying. This improvised weapon briefly gives her a fighting chance in "Magic Kingdom Mania," during Mindstein's siege of Castle Infinia.
  • Butt-Monkey: Quite a few jokes taken at her expense, not unlike her old man. For example, in "The Legend of Lonk" Nurse jokes that she sold Messi to pay for alternate Breath Of The Wild armors. Crafty takes the statement at face value and doesn't mind Messi's departure one bit. There's also the time in "GEMS! Truly Outrageous!" when she accidentally hit Nurse with a mop, and she retaliated by punching Messi in the face.
  • Casual Kink: Out of everyone in the Crafty Crew, Messibelle is the most willing to discuss her favorite kinks and sexual activities — perhaps all too much. This openness quickly starts disturbing her co-workers throughout Season 2. Almost every time she starts lusting in the Top Ten Tub, a panicked Crafty rushes to cut the camera. During Beach Month, Nurse quickly starts to lose her temper around Messi, and even the ever-patient Pepper seems disquieted. The discomfort all comes to a head in "Dumb Dingies," where Messi's horniness gives Crafty several consecutive panic attacks. Nurse finally caves and directly, but calmly, reprimands Messi for not keeping her lust under control. The warning seems to stick with Messi; she's restrained herself considerably since, especially during Season 3. She still has her moments, but she's noticeably more considerate of others when she drools over women.
  • Characterization Marches On: Towards the end of the second season, her salaciousness was toned down significantly. While she still proudly touts herself as a "thirsty girl," it's no longer the forefront of her personality. Come Season 3, there's now more emphasis placed on her energetic personality and her father-daughter relationship with Crafty.
  • The Cobbler's Children Have No Shoes: Messibelle is well-versed in couples counseling and romantic relationships. However, she's rather hopeless with managing her own love life. She's only managed sexual flings at best, and she's laughably ignorant of Serena's unsubtle crush on her. Even when Serena — dressed in a full wedding gown — flirts with her in "Couples," Messi obliviously continues treating her like a friend.
  • Distracted by the Sexy: In several of her Season 2 appearances, she lusts after nearly every lady who appears onscreen. She eventually matured from this mindset over time, keeping her lewd, flirty side in check without erasing it altogether.
  • Ditzy Genius: She's far from stupid, though she nonetheless demonstrates bouts of naivety or literal-mindedness. Both are demonstrated as early as the first episode of "Top Ten Tub," where Crafty comments on an OC who is dark in concept. Messi comments that she can still see him, thinking the OC was supposed to be in the dark.
  • Double Entendre: She tends to drop a lot of innuendos whenever she's aroused by someone.
  • Establishing Character Moment: She's introduced in the Season 2 Update Video excited to finally be on screen, eventually pressing her face against the camera and teasing the audience.
  • Exotic Eye Designs: Her pupils are shaped like hearts. They even change into broken hearts whenever she's mad or upset.
  • French Maid Outfit: She wears the upper-half of one as her typical day-clothes. In addition, she wears a lengthy skirt crafted from her own slime, one that drapes over her figure. "A Well Slimed Machine" reveals that the outfit was Crafty's idea — but not for his titilation. It just downplays whatever resemblance Messi has to Crafty's worst nightmare.
  • Foil: Messibelle serves as a distinct counterpart to Pepper, the other cohost introduced in Season 2. Pepper tends to be well-mannered and introverted, while Messi can be crass and is decidedly extroverted. Meanwhile, whereas Pepper is grey-asexual and doesn't act on her romantic feelings, Messi is homosexual and incredibly lecherous (even after she toned things down later on). Yet, despite the adult edge to her character, Messi lacks the concrete life experience that Pepper has. This is because Messi was born only a few days before her debut appearance and has barely ventured beyond the castle, while Pepper was a seasoned nomad before settling down at Crafty's. As a consequence, Messi exhibits some childish tendencies, while Pepper exhibits some motherly tendencies, a contrast that is occasionally highlighted in their interactions.
  • Genki Girl: She's very excitable with a bubbly personality.
  • Good Bad Girl: Messi is an absolutely flirty and promiscuous lesbian with a good heart. Notably, even before she toned down her behavior in Season 3, if it turns out a woman is taken or is interested in someone else, Messi will gracefully retract her advances. If it's a woman she personally knows, she stops trying to seduce her to instead ensure her happiness as it is. This quality is primarily demonstrated in Messi's friendship with Nurse. She goes from flirting with her the moment she sees her in "New Season, New Friends," to encouraging Nurse to be true to herself and embrace her feelings for Crafty in "The Beachles" and especially "Crafty Hearts Re:Coded."
  • Hartman Hips: Messi's unambiguously the most bottom-heavy of the cast proportionally. Her hips are wider than her shoulders, and she has a surprisingly large rump and well-defined legs.
  • Hidden Depths:
    • As revealed in "Couples," Messibelle takes couples counseling courses during her off-time, to help her understand Nurse and Crafty's relationship. Her behavior throughout season 3 (and even late into season 2, in hindsight) implies that she's also applying these lessons to herself; she develops a more nuanced outlook on her taste in women.
    • "Pros and Comms" establishes that Messi has some deep-seated abandonment issues. Upon witnessing Crafty drawing a picture of himself with Maidbot, she starts sobbing and begging not to be replaced. To give an idea for how drastic her reaction is, "Pros and Comms" was uploaded right after her debut episode, "New Season, New Friends." It's for this reason that, in the spin-off crossover, she takes her imprisonment the hardest. At first, she's irritable and displaces her frustration onto her coworkers. Then her temper gradually fizzles out, and she begins crying and pleading for Crafty to save them.
  • Ideal Illness Immunity: She's immune to every disease since her slime kills all germs that it encounters.
  • Irony: Most of the mess she cleans up comes from the trail of slime she leaves behind her.
  • I Need a Freaking Drink: Her predicament of being banished to the Shadow Realm with the other co-hosts led to her wanting a beer to drink.
  • Lady Swears-a-Lot: Even though her expletives are censored, she has sworn on the show more than anyone else combined.
  • Like Father, Like Daughter: Messi slowly transitioned away from calling Crafty her "Master," and she soon prefers to address him as her father. Accordingly, she emulates his traits in her own ways as the series progresses. Like Crafty, she tends to be eccentric, a little crude, immensely Oblivious to Love towards certain people, and prone to cracking cheesy puns — sometimes even more than Crafty himself. Also, it's thanks to these qualities that they both sometimes get on Nurse's nerves.
  • Lipstick Lesbian: Every character she's flirted with has been female. As she states in "Aquatic Characters," Prince Sidon is the one guy Messi would ever contemplate going straight for.
  • Lovable Sex Maniac: She always acts horny in every on-screen appearance she makes, but she's kind and helpful around the lab regardless. Even after she's mellowed out in Season 3, "Disney Characters" reveals that she regularly visits strip clubs with the ladies of the Top 10 Dr. Crafty OCs, paying for each visit with her weekly allowance.
  • Mad Scientist's Beautiful Daughter: While Crafty is by no means ugly, his surrogate daughter Messibelle is a bombshell. And unlike most examples of this trope, she knows just how beautiful she is and plays it up, both audibly and visually. As many of her appearances demonstrate, she can transition from goofy and energetic to flirty and sultry at the drop of a hat.
  • Married to the Job: She's quite dedicated to her job as a maid under Crafty. She even gets emotional when she thought Crafty was going to replace her, a conclusion she mistakenly came to in the very next episode after her debut.
  • Meaningful Name:
    • A twofold example. As a maid, Messibelle's job is to clean up whatever mess befalls the castle. However, she must frequently clean up her slime, which itself can be quite messy.
    • Her surname — Deluge-Latrine — has a few layers to it. At face value, it means "severely flooded toilet." Scrubbing toilets would obviously be something a maid could do. The surname also coincides with her French Maid Outfit, since the words comprising it are partially French in origin.
  • Ms. Fanservice: While all the cohosts show some fanservice now and then, Messibelle knowingly fulfills this role the most frequently. She has an hourglass figure adorned with a French Maid Outfit that highlights her breasts and exposes her large rear (though she does cover it with a slime gown, the gown is transparent). All of her poses emphasize her figure in certain ways, such as her hips swaying from side-to-side when transitioning between poses. She also has a sultry voice and loves to press up against the camera to flirt with the audience. Over time, the fanservice she provided was toned down, but it's nonetheless still present.
  • Ms. Vice Girl: During her debut season, Messibelle is often distracted by her lust, seeking to satisfy it first when she could be doing other things. She got her libido under control by Season 3, in exchange for emulating some of Crafty's vices. Nevertheless, she's still a kind soul who freely gives out legitimate praise.
  • Naked First Impression: Crafty gave Messibelle her maid outfit since she was naked when he first created her.
  • Oblivious to Love: For someone who actively pursues romantic companionship, Messi can be very ignorant when she's being chased. Starting with "Crafty Fan Characters," infrequent extra Serena develops — and can barely contain — an attraction towards Messi, who is utterly none the wiser. At most, she thinks Serena is a nice girl.
  • OOC Is Serious Business:
    • In the season 3 premiere, the normally excitable and perky Messibelle becomes calm and sullen, having spent nearly four months ruminating over "The Foreshadow Game's" events. This change was motivated by her concern for Nurse Worse and how she regards Crafty.
    • A heartbreaking example occurs in the spin-off crossover. When Messi brings up All-Might to conclude her segment, she describes him as the ultimate dad character... upon which she starts choking up. Soon after, she starts sobbing in Pepper's lap for Crafty — her "daddy" — to come back.
  • Perverse Sexual Lust: According to some assorted trivia posted on Twitter, she has a special crush on all the Disney Princesses.
  • Polyamory: She wants to get married to as many women as possible.
  • Porn Names: Apparently, her porn nickname is "Sloppy Suzy." Scout derisively addresses Messi as such in "Crafty Fan Characters," without realizing that the alias is used elsewhere.
  • Precision F-Strike: Episode 36 features Messibelle calling the Great Mighty Poo "a little shit," only to immediately apologize for swearing since this is (mostly) a family-friendly show.
  • Pungeon Master: She has her moments with making non-sexual puns, such as the time she caused a pun overload around Shovel Knight in the third Top 10 Tub.
  • Rubber Woman: Her slimy body allows her to stretch in any position she wants, seemingly with less limit than Pepper. This came in handy when she stretched her arms from the dungeon all the way to the roof, restraining Doctor Mindstein long enough for Crafty to finish her off.
  • Screw Yourself: Messi grows aroused by Crafty's chibi drawing of her in "Dumb Dingies," then attempts to create and have sex with her own clone. It's this moment where Messi's libido finally crosses too many lines: offscreen, Crafty suffers several consecutive panic attacks in response. Nurse arrives for damage control, and she addresses the matter head-on in an impromptu therapy session with Messi. Judging by her later appearances, the session firmly put Messi in her place.
  • Shipper on Deck: She thinks of Dr. Crafty and Nurse Worse as a couple, no matter how much the latter tries to deny the truth. She's even taking couples counseling courses online should they need it. Consequentially, as "Crafty Hearts Re:Grouped" reveals, she's Nurse's biggest critic. She disapproves of her friend's half-hearted secrecy and wishes Nurse would just confess her feelings already. Even so, Messi's mainly concerned about Nurse's emotional wellbeing, especially once they're made aware of Sasha's history with Crafty.
  • Signing-Off Catchphrase: "Until next time, goo-bye!"
  • Slime Girl: Notably, her slime is made up of random bathroom chemicals that Crafty accidentally spilled together.
  • Stupid Sexy Flanders: In "Aquatic Characters," Messi admits that she has quite a crush on Prince Sidon. It isn’t a passing fancy, either; when he makes an in-person appearance, she's so aroused by him that her ovaries rupture.
  • The Tease: It was initially pretty much standard for her to flirt with almost everyone she sees. To drive the point further, Messi has a unique set of poses where she presses against the screen; most of them have her smiling broadly or coquettishly.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: According to Curious Cat, shampoo.
  • True Blue Femininity: Messibelle is primarily a neon blue. She chiefly represents the beautiful and lonely aspects of the trope:
    • For the beauty aspect of her character, she willingly provides Fanservice the most out of the Crafty Crew. According to Sidon in "Aquatic Characters," Messi has developed a prominent reputation for her good looks.
    • For the lonely aspect of her character, she flirts with just about every woman she comes across, especially during Season 2, but she never seems to land a long-term date. As "Couples" reveals, she's consequentially desperate for love, with her romantic advances being incredibly forward. Starting with Season 3, her couples counseling courses taught her to dial everything back.
  • Verbal Tic: She usually says "goo" in place of "good" or "god." "Original Characters" shows that she also uses "goo" as a cry of indignation.
  • Visual Pun: Messibelle, a woman made of cleaning products like soap, has a bubble butt.
  • Womanchild: Despite being born a young adult, Messi harbors some childishness that surpasses Crafty's in some areas. She requires constant attention and feels most comfortable when Crafty is nearby. She fixates on satisfying her needs at inappropriate times, and she generally doesn't read the room because of it. As time goes on, she grows up a little bit, going from immediately making out in public in "Original Characters" to calmly articulating her crush on Belle in "Disney Characters."
  • Younger Than They Look: Given she was born mere days before "New Season, New Friends," her debut, Messibelle is only 4 years old. She came out of the castle pipes looking exactly as she does now. The audience is reminded of how young she really is in the spinoff crossover, when she starts crying like a young child about how she misses the doctor, calling him daddy the entire time.
    "I miss my daddy!"

    Madame Crystelle 
Madame Crystelle
"My abilities can reveal plenty about this series... Thankfully, they cannot speak for themselves. *giggles*"
Voiced by: Inrezairo

A mysterious Fortune Teller who spends her time inside one of the closets within Crafty's lair, Madame Crystelle is a sentient crystal ball introduced in Season 3, alongside her spin-off series; Crafty’s Questionable Qloset. Unlike Crafty’s other companions and spin-offs, Crystelle hosts the Questionable Qloset herself, giving her room a relaxing atmosphere to help her concentrate. She is deeply knowledgeable about the universe she resides in, and she always looks forward to answering peoples’ queries (albeit at a tiny financial cost) in the hopes that her powers will put them on the right path. While she appreciates the company of those who visit her, unwanted guests like Disgustilda and Jedah Dohma, whom she has had past quarrels with, in particular, do happen to get on her nerves.

Crystelle was created by Dollwoman, and their original concept art for Crystelle can be found here.

  • Ascended Extra: Despite being a core cast member and helming her own spin-off show, Crystelle is otherwise quite insulated from the cast throughout much of Season 3, her debut. It's not until "Magic Kingdom Mania" and the Spin-off Special that she gets to interact with the cast a bit more. She continues to be included in the cast's ensemble interactions throughout the Season 4 Premiere Month and onward.
  • All-Powerful Bystander: This is discussed for the first question about her. While she is aware of several futures, she can't always tell which one would come true in the current timeline, and the ones she does know about she can't interfere in, lest she disrupts the flow of the timeline. She also can't see into her own future, as she feels that would make her far too powerful and scatter the time flow, which is why she couldn't predict being captured by the Doc-Drohnes.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance:
    • Crystelle embodies the fortune teller archetype wholeheartedly. Not only does she dress the part, with ornate, mystical clothing, but she also goes as far as being the trademark crystal ball.
    • The rings that adorn her wrists and shins are way wider than where they're placed. It's as if they're held aloft by a mystical power — just as she happens to possess.
  • Bald Woman: Justified as her head is a crystal ball, which obviously can't grow hair in the first place.
  • Celestial Body: Her magical construct body is light purple with several stars inside.
  • Chrome Dome Psi: A rare female example, as she's a psychic with no hair.
  • Crystal Ball: A living, sentient example of one.
  • Endearingly Dorky: While she tries to maintain a stoic, mystical demeanor, she has plenty of moments where her serious act is broken and she proves to be just as quirky as the other characters. This is especially the case whenever she does an adorable giggle following a pun or a question for her.
  • Extradimensional Power Source: While she's a skilled psychic, her powers work best inside of her closet. She explained that it's the source of her mystical energy, which she uses for sustenance instead of earthly means like food. If she's removed from the closet, then she would lose her construct body until she returns to it.
  • Fashion Model: She admits she used to be one back in her younger years, even being a front-page model for "Forture Fatale Psychic Weekly" multiple times.
  • Hartman Hips: They're pretty noticeable, especially thanks to the color balance on her skirt that stands out from most of the purple. Unlike Messi, Crystelle carries a slightly larger upper body.
  • Heroism Incentive:
    • Crystelle will gladly answer people's questions... provided they can spare a dollar, and she's quite eager for money. Not even her coworkers are exempt from paying for her services, as shown in "Magic Kingdom Mania":
      Crystelle: "Crafty, I don't need clairvoyance to see that this whole scheme of yours is a disaster waiting to happen. But, y'know... It's kind of my thing, so — yes. This is a disaster literally waiting to happen."
      Crafty: "Oh, come now. What's the worst that could possibly happen?"
      Crystelle, instantly lighting up: "Well, for a dollar, I can tell you —"
      Crafty: "Oh no, you don't! You're squeezing blood from a stone if you think I'm paying for your psychic services! Sheesh, you're almost as much of a shill as I am..."
      Crystelle: "*Sigh*... I foresaw that wouldn't work, and yet I'm still disappointed."
    • In "We're Back! A Crafty Story," she tries the same spiel when Nurse enters her closet. Once again, she doesn't even get to finish — unlike Crafty, Nurse pays up, forcing a dollar bill into Crystelle's hands and firmly demanding her help. After her initial shock, Crystelle gets right down to business.
  • I Am Very British: She speaks with a refined British accent, which helps convey her elegant and mystical nature.
  • Madame Fortune: It's right there in the name.
  • Magical Barefooter: She's a fortune-teller who doesn't wear any shoes.
  • Non-Human Head: She has a crystal ball head that doesn't provide any facial features except her eyes.
  • OOC Is Serious Business: If Crystelle cannot understand something from her visions of the future, something is very wrong. Ever since her terrifying visions in the Spin-Off Special, Crystelle has been trying to investigate further... but something indescribable is keeping her future sight at bay. She tries letting Crafty know about this issue in "We're Back! A Crafty Story," but he's too focused on upholding a skit to pay attention.
  • Purple Is Powerful: Her primary color scheme is purple and she's quite a skilled psychic.
  • Remember the New Guy?: Unlike Pepper and Messi, Crystelle never got a proper introduction. The closest we got was in the Season 3 trailer that revealed her show, but it's still unknown how she met Crafty.
  • Seers: The main thing she uses her psychic powers for is seeing the future.
  • Star-Spangled Spandex: In addition to the stars on her body, she has some on her cloak as well.
  • Statuesque Stunner: Her official listed height is 6' 4", making her one of the tallest characters on the show. She's third only to Pepper and Sasha in terms of height.

"So, this the place, huh? Well, if I gotta do this, may as well do it with style."
Voiced by: Elsie Lovelock

Forced into Crafty Industries thanks to her restrictive probation from Salem Prison, Stylene Salagadoola Bouffant is an ex-convict witch introduced in season 4 to co-host the spin-off series, Crafty's Shake-up Salon. A stylist by trade, Stylene specializes in character makeovers, whether it be with hairstyles, outfits, or facial applications, often done through her skills in the art of spell-casting. Unlike the other co-hosts, however, she is not afraid to be upfront with her own level of sass, as her blunt demeanor gives her a more abrasive attitude by comparison. Despite her thoughts on the Crafty crew as a whole, Stylene still aims to do her best with what she's now stuck with.

Stylene was created by the artist Chronnellian, and their original concept art for Stylene can be found here.

  • Anime Hair: Impressively, her hair is styled like a giant witch hat.
  • Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance: Stylene's hair is woven into the shape of a typical witch's hat. It's done so well that you'd be forgiven for regarding it as a true hat. It's both expected witch iconography and a testament to her skills as a stylist.
  • Blood Knight: Comically enough, Stylene actively enjoyed her rowdy time in prison, more so than her time with the Crafty Crew at first. In "Player Select," she's quick to reminisce about her prison days and the many fights she started, and all the talk of fighting games gets her rearing to shiv someone with her hair clippers.
  • Boxed Crook: The only reason she's working for Crafty at all is to reduce her sentence from Salem Prison.
  • Brooklyn Rage: Her accent very much hints at this.
  • Burn the Witch!: A downplayed example as she was just incarcerated, but this is pretty much the only reason she was arrested in the first place.
  • Can't Take Criticism: As Pollo finds out in "A Pollo Loco Premiere," Stylene has a loose temper when it comes to snide remarks at her expense. She almost attacks Pollo after he talks down to her too many times, but Pollo handily blasts her away with his chest gun.
  • Chatty Hairdresser: Even if her discussions are quite demeaning to the person she's talking to.
  • Cleavage Window: The hole in her shirt leaves little to the imagination.
  • Dark-Skinned Blond: Stylene is a black woman with a voluminous blond hairstyle, which makes her look like she's wearing a witch's hat.
  • Deadpan Snarker: She will not hesitate to dish out snarky remarks on anyone.
  • Establishing Character Moment: In her debut episode, "We're Back! A Crafty Story," Stylene is dropped off by a police car outside the castle. She looks and sounds very displeased with this parole arrangement, but she still vows to follow her conditions. After all, she can easily put her skills to use while working with Crafty.
  • Grumpy Bear: Due to her parole requirements, Stylene is only working with Crafty out of obligation rather than any innate desire. She has little patience for the rest of the Crew's antics; whenever she's onscreen, she puts forth the bare minimum before retreating to her quarters. She does just that in "Player Select," and as everyone else is deciding on a fighting game to play that night, Stylene suddenly gives her opinion of them from offscreen:
    "HEY! KEEP IT DOWN IN THERE; I'M TAKING A BATH! I swear, it's like friggin' torture listening to you guys sometimes!"
  • Hartman Hips: Like Messibelle and Crystelle before her, she's got a pretty wide set of hips.
  • Hot Witch: She's got some generous curves, along with clothes that show off her breasts and legs.
  • Ice Queen: Out of all the hosts, she's pretty much the meanest; unlike the others, she's not too happy about working for Crafty, not to mention she'll dish out blunt insults to everyone she meets.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: While abrasive and very open about her issues with the Crafty Crew, Stylene does have a friendlier side. "A Pollo Loco Premiere" shows that she's much more pleasant when working on her spin-off and in her salon. She also offers a reassuring hand to Crafty in "Happy Crafty Day," when he starts tenderly sobbing over the cohosts' kindness.
  • The Makeover: Stylene is a hairdresser, but she also reveals in "Player Select" that she's good with makeup. Her skillset is put into practice in the Shake-Up Salon, where she works on enhancing the designs of Patreon-supporter-voted characters from other properties with Crafty.
  • Meaningful Name: "Stylene Salagadoola Bouffant" can be broken down into three digestible chunks:
    • "Stylene" directly calls attention to her job as a hairstylist.
    • "Salagadoola" comes from the name of a magic spell from Disney's Cinderella, befitting of a witch such as herself.
    • "Bouffant" is a hairstyle, which, like her first name, also concerns her profession.
  • Peek-a-Bangs: Her left eye is obscured by her hair.
  • Salem Is Witch Country: Referenced in her backstory, as she was previously serving time in a Salem jailhouse. She was offered probation, under the condition that she works for Crafty.
  • Sassy Black Woman: She's got brown skin and is described as being sassy and blunt.
  • Shout-Out: Her middle name — Salagadoola — comes from one of the Fairy Godmother's spells from Disney's Cinderella.
  • Token Evil Teammate: Stylene is the one Crafty Crewmate with an active criminal background, which she's extremely proud of. She's quite brash and has little patience for her coworkers; she's happiest when hosting her spin-off segments, away from most everyone else.

Additonal Members

    Zombie Minions 
Zombie Minions
From top to bottom: RJ Grid, Whyboy and Nero, ToxicSoul77, Katy Johnson, Alex, and SkittlezJuice.
The writers, editors, and additional artists of Crafty's videos. They're zombified versions of Paladin Taim, RJ Grid, Nero, and Whyboy of ToonGrin, ToxicSoul77, Katy Johnson, Alex Tansley, and SkittlezJuice.
  • Amazing Technicolor Population: Katy has pink skin, which is quite an unusual color for the undead.
  • Artificial Limbs: RJ has a metal claw for a left arm.
  • Author Avatar: Zombie Alex is the zombified avatar of the show's creator and Crafty's VA, though he is seldom used since Crafty fulfills a similar purpose.
  • Bare Your Midriff: Katy's shirt exposes her abdomen... or what's left of it, as all that remains of her torso is her spine and pelvis.
  • Butt-Monkey: Unless they directly threaten to attack the doctor, they get no respect from Crafty as employees.
  • The Cameo: They briefly appear in Part 4 of "I Need a Hero Academia," where they're seen standing in a doorway watching the action unfold.
  • Celebrity Paradox: Katy and ToxicSoul77 are the voices of Pepper and Messibelle, yet they also exist as zombies in-universe.
  • Frankenstein's Monster: SkittlezJuice has more in common with the likes of Nurse and Screw than a typical zombie. She has a giant head-bolt, multicolored stitched skin, and a clean body for what she is, unlike her decaying zombie coworkers.
  • Flesh-Eating Zombie: According to AskFM, the zombies eat some of the fan-art characters Crafty keeps in storage.
  • Glowing Eyelights of Undeath: The ToonGrin zombies have these.
  • Killed Off for Real: To symbolize Paladin Taim's permanent departure from the show, his zombie self is unceremoniously shot dead in the Season 3 update video.
  • Put on a Bus: During the transition between seasons 2 and 3, Paladin Taim was fired from the show — for reasons that can't be discussed here. Katy and her zombie persona took his place.
    • RJ Grid has also stepped down as editor, though on much friendlier terms.
  • Reused Character Design: Zombie Alex bears heavy resemblance to Crafty, seeing as they have the same VA.
  • Revenant Zombie: They're intelligent enough to use the software and grammar required to do their jobs.
  • Satellite Character: Their only defining characteristic is that they write and edit the show. They don't have much of a presence on the show besides that.
  • Sir Swears-a-Lot: Whenever Crafty tries to take advantage of them, they usually respond by spewing several (somehow grammatically-correct) profanities.
  • Suddenly Speaking: After all the cameos the zombies made, Episode 51 finally gives a speaking moment to Nero... though how he can talk when he's missing a jaw is anyone's guess.
  • Those Two Guys: Nero and Whyboy are commonly seen together. This is because the writers they're based on host their own show: ToonGrin. They speak for the other zombies and their displeasure of working under Crafty, calling him out more viciously than the main characters could ever hope. Nero, in particular, delights in attacking Crafty's appearance under his breath.
  • Who Writes This Crap?!: This is their preferred method of getting back at Crafty: by making him say embarrassing things they write in the script.


How well does it match the trope?

Example of:


Media sources: