Characters from the Argentinian comic book Cazador
Cazador
Nominal Hero par excellence, Cazador is a hedonist whose only interests are alcohol, women and football. He only answers the Call to Adventure when there's absolutely no other choice, and always reluctantly -unless the correct Berserk Button is pressed or a sufficient reward is offered to him. His backstory actually stretches back to the colonization of the Americas: he was the son of a German mercenary who arrived to the New World in an expedition led by Juan Díaz de Solís. Expelled from his town under accusations of cannibalism, Cazador led a group of fellow exiles in a bloody crusade against the natives, whom he blamed for his troubles.
During one of his brutal raids, Cazador spared a native who promised to lead him to a hill full of pure silver and food in return. He was instead lured into an ambush, where most of his men were massacred and he was taken prisoner. As punishment for his actions, the natives subjected him to a ritual by which spirits possessed his body, granting him eternal life, so that he would get to experience the pain of not being able to die. He was therefore cursed to walk the Earth from then on, becoming a bane for those around him. Accompanying this curse, there was a revelation: unbeknownst to Cazador, as his father had kept it secret from him, his own mother was a native, and she died while giving birth to him.
- Been There, Shaped History: If we are to believe Cazador, he was involved in all major conflicts of the 20th Century; in particular he committed the murder that started World War I (by accident, his trigger finger slipped), he was responsible for Hitler's major defeats (out of sheer incompetence, he was working for the Nazis), and he dropped the atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki (by accident again, supposedly their intended target was Tokyo). His accounts are made slightly more believable by the fact that Cazador really has been around for long enough to be involved in those events.
- BFG: Almost always carries one (he steals them from the army and stashes them in his house).
- Berserk Button: Don't mess with his teddy bear Bussi, for starters.
- Boisterous Bruiser: He's more cranky than the usual example, but he does love to drink and party, and that's all he'd ever do if given the chance.
- Deadpan Snarker: He's very vocal in his disdain for whatever is going on at the moment.
- Dumb Muscle: Very strong, very dumb.
- Full-Frontal Assault: He once spent an entire adventure in the nude without realizing it until the end.
- Gentle Giant: Averted, but he'll try to play the part if he thinks it can help to woo a girl.
- Good Thing You Can Heal: Cazador has survived being eviscerated, impaled, having chunks of his body blown away, and worse.
- Gratuitous English: He was making a mess in Disneyworld, so Mickey requested Minnie to call the police.Cazador: ¿Qué? ¿"Police"? ¡Esa sí te la entendí, ratón conchudo! Translation
- Hair-Trigger Temper: Sometimes just trying to talk to him at the wrong time is all it takes to piss him off.
- Heroic Build: Though that's pretty much all that is heroic about him.
- I Am a Humanitarian: He resorts to this from time to time, and it's part of his curse.
- I Love the Dead: He has expressed no qualms over doing this, thankfully we never get to see it.
- In-Series Nickname: He has many; "Caza", "Cazi" and "Cazita" are some of the most frequently used.
- Jerkass: Don't expect him to be nice to you, even if you're on his side.
- Mad Bomber: He is proficient with all kinds of explosives, and has reduced many people to bloody bits with them.
- Multiple-Choice Past: In a special issue, Cazador's origin is retold from the point of view of a historian, and a few details are changed (for example, Cazador knew he was half native all along, and his immortality is hereditary). Whether this constitutes a Retcon or a case of Unreliable Narrator/All Just a Dream (Cazador's Origins Episode was framed as his dying hallucination) is anyone's guess.
- Psychopathic Manchild: He still believes in Santa Claus, collects bottle caps, sleeps with a teddy bear and uses a very childish language.
- Really 500 Years Old: As he was born during the colonization of the Americas.
- Real Men Eat Meat: And it really doesn't matter what it comes from.
- Real Men Hate Sugar: He rarely eats sugary foods. For example, when he was given the choice between having cake or a day-old chorizo sandwich, he chose the latter.
- Resurrective Immortality: Part of his curse.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: He's prone to do this if he's annoyed enough by the people around him and/or the situation at hand.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: Yes, he swears a lot, but... "Sir"?
- Sociopathic Hero: He ends up saving the day now and then, but at the cost of piles of corpses and damage. On top of that, if he finds any attractive women during his mission, he will drop everything to try to seduce them.
- Third Wheel: The very first story arc has him unwittingly caught in the war between the demons Melkor and Balrog.
- Unskilled, but Strong: Cazador can crush skulls with his bare hands; he doesn't need any fancy martial art moves.
- Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist: He may be a mean jerk, but his stupidity and childishness are the most frequent sources of comedy.
- Weirdness Magnet: He tends to attract many weirdos who look for his help or try to fight him, much to his chagrin.
- Would Hurt a Child: Though it's slightly downplayed by the fact that Kids Are Cruel is pretty much always in effect.
Allies
Uncle Pastafrola
An Italian mobster who hangs out with Cazador sometimes. He considers Cazador a close friend, but the feeling isn't mutual.
- Beware the Silly Ones: He's quite clumsy and something of a Cloud Cuckoolander, but a comic shows him to be a highly skilled and renowned ninja. He's also The Don, so he has thugs and assassins at his disposal.
- Bumbling Sidekick: Except that one time mentioned above, he isn't of much help whenever he tags along with Cazador.
- Butt-Monkey: Cazador doesn't respect him, so he's a frequent target of his insults. He's also on the receiving end of a lot of violence, often by accident.
- Edible Theme Naming: "Pasta frolla" is a pastry of Italian origins which is popular in Argentina.
- Fun Personified: He seems to organize more parties than heists.
- Miniature Senior Citizens: He's quite small indeed.
- The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: As mentioned above, he's rarely seen involved in criminal activities.
- Poirot Speak: He speaks Spanish with a heavy Italian accent and some words of that language thrown in.
- The Ugly Guy's Hot Daughter: Averted by his daughter who is quite ugly, but he has beautiful granddaughters instead: the Sailor Senshi!
Hunter (a.k.a. '1st World Cazador')
Cazador's intelligent and polite American counterpart, real name Robert Howard. Working for NASA, he refused to take part in the construction of an explosive device using technology recovered from a UFO crash. Unfortunately, that meant he knew too much, which led to an assassination attempt in his house disguised as a gas explosion. Robert survived, but his family was killed. Angry at this, he donned the identity of Hunter to chase down and kill the persons responsible for the attack.
- Badass Bookworm: He is a former NASA scientist, after all.
- Badass Normal: He only has his wits, guns, and some cool gadgets to take on the likes of Captain America, Superman, or a whole alien army.
- Category Traitor: He is branded as a traitor by other Americans when he goes against the government's plans, but he's just doing what he thinks is right.
- The Comically Serious: He comes off as this whenever he discusses the mission with Cazador, who couldn't care less about it and complains constantly.
- Conspiracy Theorist: Though in this comic's universe, and considering his backstory, that's being Properly Paranoid.
- Defector from Decadence: He left his country to seek out Cazador for help after learning that the US government was planning to stave off an alien invasion by selling out South America to the invaders (perhaps a Shout-Out to the ill-fated remake of El Eternauta, which had that same premise). He also had personal reasons for going against the wishes of his government and fighting the aliens, as many years prior they had abducted Bettie Page, of whom he is in love with, as part of the deal.
- Evil Counterpart: Inverted, he is Cazador's Good Counterpart. Pretty much the only thing they have in common is a blue cowl with a white symbol on the forehead and the meaning of their codenames; even though they both are on the side of Good their motivations for doing so are completely opposite.
- Good Is Not Soft: He's willing to fight with lethal force if it's needed to save the world.
- Guile Hero: Cazador wasn't willing to help him at first, so he convinced him that Bettie would thank them very, very well if they rescued her.
- Heartbroken Badass: His encounter with Bettie Page doesn't come out the way he would have liked (actually, he never meets Bettie at all, the aliens show him a decoy to make him believe that she has become a hideous abomination. The real Bettie is fine, she just doesn't want anything to do with him).
- Hero of Another Story: Besides having his own comic which predated Cazador, a Spin-Off featuring him was planned, but it didn't take off.
- Innocent Bigot: He can be a bit condescending at times, but he means well.
- Jet Pack: He carries some on his jeep.
- Meet Your Early-Installment Weirdness: He is in fact the original Cazador, before the massive Retool that resulted in the comic as it became popular.
- Nice Guy: Especially when compared to his brutish Argentinean version.
- Non-Powered Costumed Hero: His costume is just his cowl, a Badass Longcoat and a Utility Belt, but still.
Enemies
Melkor
One of the demons vying for control of Hell, he has a bone to pick with Cazador for thwarting his plans to control the mortal plane as well.
- Arch-Enemy: Of Cazador, and also other demon lords.
- The Corrupter: He takes pride in how easy it was for him to corrupt the church and the government.
- Demonic Possession: One of his abilities; he first used it to control the president in order to exact revenge on Cazador from a position of power.
- Evil Versus Evil: His feud with Balrog, and later Satan himself.
- Faux Affably Evil: If he's in a good mood.
- For the Evulz: He engaged in random acts of violence in his first appearances, though he became more focused once he had set his true plans in motion.
- Hell on Earth: What he wants to bring about.
- I Have Many Names: A Time Travel story has Cazador meeting him in the past; people of the era referred to him as Arawn, the king of the underworld in Welsh mythology. When Cazador addresses him as Melkor, he recognizes it as one of his names. Presumably, he's the god of the underworld in many cultures.
- I Shall Taunt You: He calls Cazador "fatty", or words to that effect.
- Joker Immunity: Being a demon, he is essentially immortal, so no matter how hard Cazador kicks his ass again and again he's always back in Hell soon enough, ready to scheme some more.
- Muggles Do It Better: As it turns out, an army of the undead is no match for a well-placed H-bomb.
- Necromancer: His original plan was to raise an army of zombies to take on his rival Balrog.
- Orcus on His Throne: Averted; he does sit in a throne and does a lot of waiting, but when the time comes for his army to fight, so does he.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: He seems to feel special contempt for homosexuals; he purposely entered a gay bar to kill all the patrons inside, and later promised to start killing the rest to gain the Church's favour.
- President Evil: For a while, as he possessed the president of Argentina. In a later comic, he takes control of Barack Obama, though this time using vanilla Mind Manipulation.
- Rock Me, Asmodeus!: In his first appearance, he certainly had the rockstar look nailed down.
- Satanic Archetype: Big Red Devil, horns and all? Check. Willing to make deals? Check. Ruler of demons? Check.
- Smug Snake: Underestimating Cazador proves to be his downfall in each of his appearances.
- Unknown Rival: When they first met after the comic was Un-Canceled in the 2000s, Cazador seemed to have forgotten all about him.
- Villain with Good Publicity: When he first surfaced to the mortal plane in the present, he instantly became a celebrity and was invited to conventions and TV shows, with his evil acts being celebrated as "funny" and "charming".
- You Have Failed Me: He killed one of his minions because he failed to steal the Necronomicon from Cazador... Then again, he took an encyclopaedia for children instead by mistake.
Balrog
A powerful demon who can only speak in swear words, usually in long, uninterrupted strings. He shares more than a passing resemblance to the Tasmanian Devil, and characters lampshade it as a Running Gag.
- Blood Knight: He seems to enjoy fighting more than any other character.
- The Brute: He's this when under Melkor's command.
- Demonic Possession: Hilarity Ensues when both he and Melkor possess the same body at once.
- Demon Lords and Archdevils: According to supplementary material, he commands an army of 2,000,000 demons.
- Demoted to Dragon: Despite being a contender to Hell's throne and Melkor's rival in his first appearances, he's seen working for him in later comics. Apparently, his allegiance to him goes back and forth.
- Horned Humanoid: Two on his head and several on his back as Spikes of Villainy.
- More Teeth than the Osmond Family: And he'd be glad to introduce you to them.
- Nothing Personal: He doesn't feel any true animosity towards Cazador, most of the times they fight is either because of a misunderstanding, or because Balrog is Just Following Orders.
- Slasher Smile: He sports one almost all the time.
- Spectacular Spinning: He moves about as a tornado as part of the general Shout-Out to Taz.
- The Unintelligible: Unless he's really just insulting all the time.
- Your Size May Vary: Depending on the Artist, he can vary between being slightly taller than a basketball player, to a towering monstrosity a couple of storeys high.
The Ultimate Abomination
Cazador's malformed brother(s) who grew out of a cyst extracted from his anus. Despite having three somewhat independent heads, he is always treated as a single entity. He has more than a bit in common with Frankenstein's Monster: abandoned by his creator/brother, and feared because of his monstrous appearance, he turns evil in frustration. In fact, many of his lines are practically lifted from the original novel; therefore, many of the tropes that apply to the creature apply to him as well.
- Angsty Surviving Triplet: Cazador cut off two of his heads and kept them as trophies after their first encounter, which left Ultimate Abomination with an even stronger grudge against his brother.
- Apologetic Attacker: He apologizes to two guys, mentioning how much he hates violence, before ripping their heads off to replace the ones he lost.
- Body Horror: He is basically an overgrown teratoma.
- Conjoined Triplets: Three brothers, a single body.
- Full-Frontal Assault: He's always nude except for his cowls, and after he suits up (from the waist up) for a Talk Show.
- Grand Theft Me: He tried to do this with Cazador once, as his consciousness had been implanted in an temporary body.
- Heel–Face Door-Slam: After Cazador agrees to return his heads, he decides to do a Heel–Face Turn and form a superhero team along with other freaks he met at the aforementioned talk show, calling themselves The Malformed 4... But Cazador blows them all up to smithereens shortly thereafter. The Ultimate Abomination survives. The freaks also turn out to be alive as well, and want revenge.
- Losing Your Head: Two of them, actually.
- Multiple Head Case: Though the heads get along just fine.
- Named by Democracy: A terrified man called him the "ultimate abomination" on a whim, and everybody went along with it.
- Names to Run Away from Really Fast: He's not just an abomination, he is the ultimate abomination. Run away, now!
- Same-Sex Triplets: All male.
- Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: He's probably the most eloquent character in the comic.
- Speak in Unison: His speech bubbles have a tail for each one of his heads.
- Why Are My Heads Ticking?: Cazador gives him his missing heads back. How nice of him, right? Wrong.
Captain Cuete
The result of a secret Super-Soldier program helmed by Reed Richards, working for NASA under orders from Stan Lee.
- Ascended Fanboy: Reading comics inspired him to become a superhero, which wasn't that difficult for him as he already had superpowers.
- Battle Cry: He's fond of shouting his own name as this.
- Captain Superhero: He wasn't very original in his choice of codename.
- Church Militant: He was given a stern Catholic education by his uncle, who was a priest. When he is contacted by the turd god (see below), this gives him a new purpose in life, to start a crusade against the Antichrist.
- The Cuckoolander Was Right: He has a drug-fuelled hallucination in which he is contacted by a god made entirely of shit. As it turns out, though, that god is very real.
- Enemy Summoner: He can produce excrements with a limited life of their own; they have eyes, mouths and claws.
- Fartillery: His superpower. He can even use his explosive farts to fly like a rocket, which gives a double meaning to his codename ('cuete', Argentinean slang for a fart, is a corruption of the Spanish word for 'rocket', 'cohete').
- Gasshole: His farts are a Weaponized Exhaust.
- Junkie Prophet: In his hallucination, the turd god instructs him to seek out the Antichrist, and eventually he does: it's Cazador.
- Knight Templar: He isn't above killing criminals, and he killed his own uncle when he found him with a prostitute, in violation of his vows.
- Power Degeneration: As an adult, his skin begins deteriorating and turning into faecal matter, a process that also alters his mind.
- Power Incontinence: He couldn't control his powers as a child, which lead to a couple of nasty accidents.
- Sanity Slippage: He begun losing his mind during his Power Degeneration, a condition which wasn't helped by his drug abuse.
- Superpower Meltdown: He begins one when Cazador injects him with a syringe full of bean soup, which was provided by Mr. Fantastic.
- Talking Poo: The living excrements mentioned above; Captain Cuete also becomes one himself at the advanced stages of his condition. Finally, the turd god takes it to the maximum.
- With Great Power Comes Great Insanity: He was pretty crazy even before his mind and body begun deteriorating.
- You Are Number 6: At NASA, he was branded "256" and showcased as a product.
Serial Killer
A man whose father was killed during one of Cazador's rampages when he was a kid. Cazador also pointed his gun at him, but spared him. This experience left him severely traumatized, with recurrent nightmares of Cazador. He came to believe that he was a powerful demon, and that by killing people in his name he would be able to calm his rage.
- Freudian Excuse: His traumatic run-in with Cazador.
- I Did What I Had to Do: He was convinced that his human sacrifices would calm down Cazador, preventing him from harming even more people.
- Mood Whiplash: There are few, if any, comical elements in his story; it's completely Played for Drama.
- No Name Given: We never find out his name, and promotional material only refers to him in generic terms.
- Perspective Flip: He had been following Cazador's adventures closely since the beginning, and we briefly get to see the events from his perspective. As it turns out, he was actually responsible for an earlier Deus ex Machina: he provided the chainsaw that Cazador found on a bus and used in his first fight against the Ultimate Abomination.
- Self-Made Orphan: Though Cazador killed his father, he himself killed his own mother and her lover as a final sacrifice.
- Senseless Sacrifice: He tried to do a heroic sacrifice to stop Cazador for good; alas, he underestimated Cazador's resilience.
Von Orenstein
Straddling the line between enemy and mere "annoying acquaintance", Von Orenstein is a comic book store owner and amateur occultist who trusted a copy of the Necronomicon to Cazador, who never paid him back. He is obsessed with collecting on this debt.
- Big Red Devil: He often wears a devil costume.
- Can't Kill You, Still Need You: He's not interested in having Cazador killed, as dead men can't pay their dues.
- Determinator: He really, really wants his $600, and he'll never stop pestering Cazador about them. Not even death itself has stopped him.
- Everything's Deader with Zombies: He gets turned into one, but even then he still wants his money back.
- Evil Debt Collector: Or at the very least, highly annoying.
- Failure Is the Only Option: Von Orenstein has no intention to give up asking for his money, but Cazador has no intention to pay him, ever.
- Greed: Earning money is his main motivation in life.
- Harmless Villain: Most of the time he doesn't actively antagonize Cazador, but when he does he's never much of a threat anyway.
- Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain: The poor guy just wants his $600. If Cazador wasn't so stubborn and just gave them to him, Von Orenstein would most likely leave him alone right away.
- Mad Scientist: He has dabbled in mad science from time to time, building a functional Time Machine on one occasion, and genetically engineering dinosaurs for sale in another.
- Never Recycle Your Schemes: Even though all his experiments have been successful, backfiring only by accident or due to Cazador's stupidity, he never tried to just recreate them with improvements.
- Plot-Irrelevant Villain: Sometimes he only shows up to do little more than reminding Cazador of his debt yet again.
- Running Gag: His petty beef with Cazador and his refusal to give up after being turned down every time are one big ongoing joke.
- Time Travel for Fun and Profit: His use for a time machine was to recover first issues of popular comic books to sell them for millions.
- Tuckerization: He was based on a real life comic store owner, but evolved into a character of his own.
- Villainous Rescue: He once saved Cazador's life, anonymously, for the pragmatic reason stated earlier.
- The Von Trope Family: Full name Eduardo Von Orenstein.
- Work Off the Debt: He has proposed this to Cazador many times, but unfortunately Cazador isn't interested, and when he does accept he doesn't make for a reliable employee, quitting at the slightest opportunity (though to be fair, working for Von Orenstein isn't very fun).
Mama Trabuco
The leader of the League of Avenger Nannas, a group of elderly Moral Guardians who want to put an end to Cazador's indecency.
- Culture Police/Media Watchdog: What her organization is, or aspires to be.
- Involuntary Shapeshifter: Professor Neurus turned her into a hideous abomination against her will to fight Cazador on even terms. She's angry at first, but grows to like her new power.
- Magic Panties: She keeps them after Hulking Out.
- Monster Modesty: Once she's turned into a monster, she doesn't bother with putting on extra clothing any more, unless she needs a disguise.
- Nazi Grandma: When agitated, she spews German and proposes gassing Cazador and turning him into soap. By extension, she qualifies as a Racist Grandma as well.
- Never Mess with Granny: Especially after her mutation.
- Old Superhero: At least she used to dress like one.
- Paper-Thin Disguise: Somehow nobody notices that the priest at a wedding has been replaced by a hulking female monster.
- Power-Upgrading Deformation: Her monstrous form makes her strong enough to be a physical threat to Cazador.
- Two Beings, One Body: A three-beings version. She gets fused with two of her cronies in the transformation process; they end up as her breasts for extra Squick.
'Guest' Characters
Professor Neurus
The main villain of the Argentinean comic and cartoon Las Aventuras de Hijitus; here he serves as the bad guys' go-to Mad Scientist.
- Abhorrent Admirer: Cachavacha the witch (also from Las Aventuras de Hijitus) is this to him.
- Animated Actors: He mentions his past as a kid show entertainer.
- Drunk with Power: He becomes this while piloting his Humongous Mecha, Truku 2000.
- Fake Boobs: He gets breast implants at some point.
- Meaningful Rename: After his change of appearance, he calls himself "Professor Glam".
- Omnidisciplinary Scientist: He has dabbled in chemistry, biology and robotics.
- Opaque Nerd Glasses: He replaces them with Opaque Nerd Goggles in his Professor Glam persona.
- Stripperiffic: His Professor Glam attire; quite the Fan Disservice.
Superhijitus
The Super Mode of Hijitus, here portrayed as an adult and involved in a homosexual relationship with his ally the sheriff of Trulalá.
- All Gays are Promiscuous: He cheats on the sheriff with a stripper, and offers to help others in exchange for sex.
- Flying Brick: He's pretty much your standard Superman Expy.
- Heroic Build: His physique has certainly improved a lot since his Kid Hero days.
- Immune to Bullets: They bounce right off his body.
- Macho Camp: Especially when out of battle.
- Overshadowed by Awesome: Despite his superhuman strength, he's still no match for Cazador.
- Queer People Are Funny: His relationship with the sheriff is Played for Laughs.
- Verbal Tic: Like the original character, he uses diminutives and adds the suffix "-us" to nouns.
Patoruzú
One of Argentina's most renowned comic book characters, he's a wealthy Tehuelche chieftain who's as generous as he's strong, which is a lot. He died off-panel of an unspecified ailment, but he was brought back to life later when his corpse, which had been embalmed with an experimental chemical created by Professor Neurus, was struck by lightning.
- Artificial Zombie: Despite being functionally alive, his body is still decomposing and emits a horrible stench.
- Enemy Mine/Fire-Forged Friends: He and Cazador set aside their differences to participate in the 1998 FIFA World Cup.
- Et Tu, Brute?: Cazador defeated him with his godfather's help (see the next section for more details).
- Gone Horribly Wrong: He was supposed to stay dead.
- Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Inherited from the original character; he doesn't take kindly to Cazador's foul language.
- Horrible Judge of Character: He still trusts his godfather Isidoro despite all the awful things he's done.
Isidoro and Upa
Patoruzú's godfather and brother, respectively, who are almost always paired together. They tried to use their relative's dead body to smuggle drugs around the country, but got into trouble with Cazador in the process.
- Brains and Brawn: Isidoro is the brains, and Upa the brawn.
- Chronic Backstabbing Disorder: Isidoro has betrayed or planned to betray practically anyone he became associated with, except for Upa.
- Dumb Muscle: Upa is definitely not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
- Easily Forgiven: The reanimated Patoruzú forgave their misdeeds after Isidoro provided him with a flimsy excuse. Too bad Cazador isn't so easily deterred...
- Fat and Skinny: Isidoro is thin, and Upa fat (though with a dose of Stout Strength).
- Higher Understanding Through Drugs: Upa enters a mystical delirium when intoxicated, which is most of the time.
- Hoist by His Own Petard/Rewarded as a Traitor Deserves: When Cazador started gaining the upper hand in his fight against Patoruzú, Isidoro betrayed his godson and helped Cazador to bring him down, thinking that Cazador would spare him in return. He was wrong.
- Hookers and Blow: This is the lifestyle they lead and are struggling hard to maintain.
- Revenge Before Reason: Isidoro makes a Deal with the Devil in order to be able to exact revenge on Cazador, but he is so obsessed with this task that he neglects to fulfil his end of the bargain. Needless to say, the Devil isn't too happy about it...
Superman
The last survivor of planet Krypton, which was destroyed by the Junians because of the warmongering nature of its inhabitants. He lives up to that reputation while working as a superpowered enforcer for the US government, though he has plans of his own.
- Absolute Xenophobe: He looks down on both humans and Martians alike, and plans to kill them all.
- Beware the Superman: Figuratively and literally.
- The Chessmaster: He had been pulling strings for about forty years to arrange the mutual destruction of Earth and Mars, part of his plans included sponsoring a civil war on the latter.
- Double Agent: He works for both the US and the Martian rebels with the intention to pit them against each other.
- Dragon-in-Chief: To both Bill Clinton and the emperor of the Martian rebels.
- Lack of Empathy: Batman tries to appeal to his human side. Superman doesn't even let him finish a sentence.Superman: I don't strike deals with races that are about to become extinct.
- Smug Super: He considers himself superior to everyone else.
- You Have Outlived Your Usefulness: He kills the leader of the rebel Martians and takes control of his army personally.
Darkseid
Superman's arch-enemy and supreme ruler of Apokolips, though he's actually Uruguayan. He turns out to be an old friend of Cazador; they met while on vacation some time before the events of his appearance in the comic.
- Ambiguously Evil: He's still the ruthless leader of Apokolips, but unlike his official incarnation he never shows any true villainous qualities nor a desire for conquest, helping to save the Earth instead by providing reinforcements to fight Superman and the Martians.
- Berserk Button: Superman.
- Cassandra Truth: He had been warning humans not to trust Superman for years.
- Let's Get Dangerous!: When Cazador and his group come to his house looking for help, he shows up wearing an undershirt, pyjama pants and slippers, and Hunter comments on how unimpressive he looks. Then Cazador mentions his arch-enemy...
- Noodle Incident: Cazador owes him ten cents from a previous encounter.
Celebrities
Diego Maradona
One of the most iconic (and controversial) football players in the history of the sport, and a close friend of Cazador.
- Cigar Chomper: He really enjoys his Cubans.
- Doting Parent: He adores his daughters and is extremely permissive towards them.
- Hands-Off Parenting: He hardly ever bothers to check what his daughters are up to, which is not a good thing.
- Fun Personified: All he ever wants is to party and have fun.
- Hero of Another Story: So much so that he got a spin-off of his own.
- Pretty in Mink: He often wears a fur coat to show off his wealth.
- Screw the Rules, I Have Money/Connections!: He has used his wealth and influence to bail Cazador out of jail more than once.
- Toxic Friend Influence: He tolerates, downplays and sometimes encourages Cazador's sociopathic behaviour; he finds it hilarious.
- Unfazed Everyman: Not only is he unfazed by all the craziness that usually follows Cazador, but actually finds it quite fun.
Others
Inspector Bullshit
A bumbling police detective from England who follows cases involving Cazador and provides exposition.
- Bring My Brown Pants: He's prone to soiling his pants in terror.
- Clueless Detective: He's not very bright; especially not as much as he thinks he is.
- Dirty Coward: His plan to avoid being attacked by a rampaging werewolf? Using his deputy as a distraction.
- Distinguished Gentleman's Pipe: He always carries one.
- Gag Nose: It's as big as the rest of his head.
- Genius Ditz: He seems to be pretty knowledgeable about werewolves.
- Hunter of Monsters: Again, of werewolves.
- Mr. Exposition: This is his main role in the stories he appears in, be it only as the narrator or in a slightly more active role.
- Occult Detective: All his cases have involved the supernatural in some capacity or other.
- Quintessential British Gentleman: Subverted. He presents himself as this, but he's far from it.
- Stiff Upper Lip: Subverted. He claims to have this, but as stated before he really doesn't.